#are the reasons for that in any way her fault or even /because/ of her? NO THEY ARE NOT.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
cloversnstrawberries · 1 day ago
Note
Can I request a platonic yandere Stars members (Wesker, Jill, Chris, etc) with a fellow stars member
If won't/don't do multiple people, could you do Wesker or Chris
All of your work has been very good and I love the layout of your blog and the actual work
Have a good day or night
platonic!yandere!S.T.A.R.S & S.T.A.R.S!gn!reader headcanons ! !
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
masterlist !
includes albert wesker, jill valentine, chris redfield, and rebecca chambers !
additional notes; hello!! i absolutely can do multiple people, and thank you so much for dropping this request, i had a lot of fun writing it :) and aaugudhg,,, i literally died when i read this,, you're so sweet (˃̣̣̥ ︿ ˂̣̣̥) i'm sorry i took so long to finish this!! i really wanted to make sure they all had a lot of content/were equal (more or less) in word count :D i also hope i got their characterizations correct,,
the dynamics for this is fatherly albert, big sister jill, big brother chris (+sister claire, because i find myself incapable of not including her), and little sister rebecca!! yandere found family dynamics.. yandere found family dynamics save me...
warnings; Overprotectiveness, possessiveness, jealousy, (very slightly) implied kidnapping(?), manipulation, guns, light violence/mention of, Reader being left out of the loop, isolation, and probably more that i may have forgotten :[ if you think there's any I should add, please let me know!! :D
w/c; Albert (3.0k) | Jill (2.6k) | Chris (2.9k) | Rebecca (3.3k)
Tumblr media
Albert Wesker
Even if you weren't qualified for it, he'd have you on the Alpha team. You’d been shooting for a position in the Bravo team, but somehow-- someway, you managed to charm your way into the captains good graces, enough for him to put you in the Alpha team,
Don't get me wrong, that doesn't mean you're going on missions with them. There were a few times where you did-- only because his higher ups (Umbrella, though you didn’t know that’s who he had to answer to) forced Wesker's hand, saying that you'd need to be demoted if you weren't actually going out in the field.
No, you were usually stuck behind, doing paperwork. You weren't complaining-- not usually, anyways. Yes, it often got boring and repetitive at times; but it's leagues better than the chaos you'd had to endure on the few required missions you went on every now-and-again.
And even then, your captain claimed they were some of the more mild missions the team had gone on. If that was mild, you sure as hell didn't want to see what the extreme could possibly be.
All in all, you were pretty alright with being saddled with all the technical things-- there were some you couldn't do, like the personal recounts that members had to fill out after a particularly high-stakes mission; but you did a good chunk of it.
One time, when you were heading to the break room for your lunch-- passing by Wesker's office, you heard him being... unusually loud. Animated, you're sure; the frosted window giving way to the interior obscured the finer details, but you could still see how he paced back and forth.
His hand was pressed to his ear-- no, his hand was holding a phone; the kind that can detach from their bases, that he was pressing to his ear, and you could practically feel the agitation that was just radiating off of him in droves.
It's not your fault-- that your curiosity got the best of you. That you tucked yourself against the nearby wall and pressed your ear to the door. If Wesker ever found out that you'd been eavesdropping, then he'd surely demote you-- or fire you entirely, was the more logical conclusion.
Which gave you all the more reason to not get caught. Despite it all, you liked this job. You liked the people you worked with-- you couldn't bare the thought of losing this job, if only because of your beloved co-workers.
The door was thick, but your captain was loud enough that you could catch most of the conversation.
It seemed like he was talking to his higher-ups-- strange, the thought of him having to answer to anyone but himself. It makes sense, though-- now that you've come face to face with it.
"I'm not sending them with the others," was what you heard first. You wondered who he was talking about-- and what he wouldn't be sending this mysterious person to, that seemingly, all other S.T.A.R.S members were going to.
...Quickly, you realized the only logical conclusion was that he referring to you. Maybe it was a high-stake mission, and whoever held authority over him (God, that never stops feeling like a strange concept to you) was saying you hadn't met whatever mission-quota required to stay on the Alpha team.
Which checks out, seeing as you were trained for the Bravo team-- graduating in the same class as Rebecca Chambers, not a single lick of real-world experience under your belt; you got the job on the basis that it'd be smaller stuff. Easy stuff, something a rookie like yourself could easily do without much trouble or personal harm.
For some god-forsaken reason, Captain Wesker was certain you'd make a fantastic fit for the Alpha team.
Whoever his higher-ups were, didn't seem to agree with him at all. And you wouldn't blame them! The last mission left you so shaken that Wesker told-- no, demanded-- you to take PTO. Reluctantly, you'd gone along with it. he sent you away with a pat on the shoulder, telling you to relax-- not worry about work for the three days he'd allotted you.
You weren't even sure if he could do that, just hand you PTO out of the blue. But then again, he is your boss-- and you have no personal experience in being such a thing to anyone, so who's to say.
Suddenly, a crash sounded out behind the door-- you jumped, leaning just a little further forward to make sure nothing seriously bad happened--
One of the chairs opposite from Wesker's own, the ones he'd tell anyone from interviewees to employees to have a seat in-- had somehow tilted over, and the loud crash was from when it collided with the ground. If you didn’t know any better, you’d assume that Wesker had, in a fit of uncharacteristic (to your knowledge) and explosive anger, shoved the innocent piece of furniture over.
A funny though— your captain, usually so calm and collected, doing something as silly as shoving a over a chair because he was having a tough time with his boss(es),
Really, you should've pulled yourself back-- but you felt rooted to the spot, watching as the clouded, but still recognizable, figure of Albert Wesker was absolutely just seething inside the office-- even through the barrier, you could see how tightly he was gripping the phone. Any harder, and it'd probably turn to dust in his palm.
Okay, maybe that was an exaggeration-- but he was holding it very, very tightly; his jaw clenched so hard that you worried for his teeth. If it'd been you, your teeth would've cracked ages ago with how tightly he grinding them together.
"I don't care what the execs want, Birkin! They're not going. I'm not sending them in like the others." Huh. That was the first time you'd ever gotten a name to the mysterious, possible higher-ups of your captain. You don't recognize the name from the precinct-- or any branch of Raccoon City law enforcement.
Maybe not a higher-up, then? Perhaps an acquaintance, or someone on a similar level of work hierarchy as Wesker? Maybe even a friend, if you were feeling so inclined.
But that didn't explain why they appeared to be talking about something relating to S.T.A.R.S, about a mission that you (you assumed he was talking about you, but you could be wrong) were being completely barred from for seemingly no reason.
Then, Wesker laughed-- an incredulous sort of noise, equal parts angry as it was mocking to whoever was on the receiving end of this phone call.
"What's got him so riled up...?" You mumble to yourself, unable to keep in your confusion-- as soon as you realized your mistake, Wesker paused. You darted back, heart pounding-- you should just head for your lunch break already. you were afforded a generous 30 minutes, but you'd probably used 1/4th of the time allotted,
If you weren’t careful, you'd waste half, or maybe even the entirety, of your break; if you didn’t restrain your curiosity soon,
And yet, you didn't leave. Didn't turn on your heel and run away like a dog with its tail between its legs.
Warily, you stared at the door-- willing the knob not to turn, praying to whatever would answer you that your boss hadn't heard that little question you'd intended entirely for yourself.
When you pacing started up again, his heavy boots thudding against the scratched hardwood floor of his office-- you breathed a quiet sigh of relief, and continued the task at hand.
This time, you didn't dare lean forward to see what he was doing. Having learned your lesson, you stayed far from the window; but just close enough to hear clearly.
A heavy, heaving sigh came next-- and you could practically visualize it now, your captains ever-present sunglasses pushed up to rest on his head, disturbing his perfectly gelled hair just a tad-- fingers pinching the bridge of his nose in exasperation.
"What am I going to do with them, huh?" He... was repeating what the other person, this Birkin, said over the phone-- you think. That's the only way you could make sense of why he could've possibly said that.
A few moments of silence followed, before Wesker-- tone eerily calm, such a stark contrast to the irritated-- no, dare you say enraged-- demeanor he'd had less than five minutes ago.
It was giving you whiplash-- Wesker didn't make much sense with his emotions and personal actions on a good day, when he was actively trying to make himself understandable to you and the other S.T.A.R.S members.
He must be pretty damn close with this Birkin person-- making no attempts to hide his strangeness, the almost cryptic and archaic way he experienced and expressed his feelings.
"Well, you know better than to think I'll spill it all over the phone, Birkin." The name was said more fondly, supporting the idea that this Birkin was a friend of your captains-- we all get annoyed with our friends form time to time, yeah? Maybe that was it.
Maybe... this wasn't even about S.T.A.R.S at all? Would that be considered a stretch? You aren't too sure, the nerves eating away at you eased at the thought-- the idea that Albert was simply speaking about his own personal affairs.
In the absence of your anxiety about being involved in whatever he was talking about, you felt an immense guilt settle, heavy and suffocating in the back of your mind.
You had half the mind to just turn on your heel and head back to work-- to eat lunch at your desk, and work twice as hard on your assignments that day. Either because you wanted something to take your mind off the fact that you butted in on your Captains personal life (something he's obviously very cagey about in the first place, god knows how he'd react knowing that you'd pried some information about it from listening into his conversation, while he stayed entirely unaware to your presence) -- whichever made the most sense. Both, if you were feeling like being honest with yourself.
But, the next thing he said made your blood run cold-- your muscles lock up and your spine straighten. You're sure you resembled a rabbit ready to bolt than a trained (albeit new) member of S.T.A.R.S.
"But I'll let you in on a little secret," His voice wasn't as loud as it was clear-- precise, and it felt as if he was directly addressing you-- but you knew that couldn't possibly have been it.
"I've grown rather fond of them, and I don't feel like giving them up to be one of our little lab rats.” After that ominous bit of information was dropped like a bomb on you, Wesker went quiet.
The person on the other side of the phone must've been responding-- within half a minute, Wesker continued speaking himself.
"I wouldn't call them a pet, Birkin. More like a companion. To call them a pet would suggest they're so much lower than me; which isn't true at all." For a split second-- despite all the... strangeness of his other words, and the context of it all (no matter how disjointed and incomplete it was with you), you let warmth curl around your heart and ease any aches and pains.
For a second, you'd imagined that-- minus the clear superiority complex, he could've been giving you this odd compliment. Could be complimenting you to his friend.
You knew it wasn't so, but you couldn't help but dream for it. You always craved Wesker's praise and approval, no matter how pathetic it'd be to admit that, it was the truth. Honestly, you're surprised you haven't accidentally called him dad before.
And if you did let something like that slip without catching yourself, you'd hand in your two-week notice yourself-- given that you don't die of embarrassment before you had the chance to.
He laughed-- you'd never heard him do that before. Sure, he’s chuckled before; and he'd snickered a few times, but never laughed.
You were shocked by how he laughed-- it seemed more fit for a cartoon villain rather than a specialized police force captain. Maybe that's why he didn't do it often? Previously, you'd just assumed he found very little amusement in most things; or was just physically incapable of laughing for some unforeseen reason.
He'd stopped pacing a little while ago-- you'd been far more focused on his words, that you hardly saw a point in keeping track of his movement, or lack of such.
But, oh god, did you realize it when he started moving again--
It sounded like he was heading toward the door.
"I know, Birkin." Your captain said-- his voice closer. Fear gripped your heart; you had to move, you had to move now, or he'd find you out and you'd be absolutely done for-- That's something you can't really get past in this line of work, eavesdropping on your bosses private conversations-- whether or not he was speaking with a higher-up or a personal acquaintance.
No matter what, if that door opened and he saw you-- then you could kiss your job goodbye, and probably any chance to get a different job in this field ever again.
Nobody liked a Nosy Nancy, did they? Especially not Wesker-- who'd snapped at nearly everyone (noticeably, everyone but you) who'd had the misfortune of even entering the goddamn breakroom while he was in there and taking a call.
He laughed again, far too close for comfort-- you had enough wits about you to stumble back; if he were to open the door now, your position wouldn't as incriminating as before. No longer bracing against the wall, ear pressed to the door of his office.
But still, not a very good look; you just standing there. But your curiosity would be the end of you-- it made you stay stuck to the spot, wanting to catch the last bit of the conversation, even if you didn't understand it at all.
"Yes, yes. I'll be sure to keep them out of your work. As long as you keep your work from them, You know how I feel about my things getting damaged." The knob began to turn-- and as the door began to creak open, the beep! from his phone signaling that the call was over--
You still didn't move, not until the very last minute; turning on your heel, you barely got a few steps forward before your heart dropped your stomach, at the sound of--
"How long have you been out here?" He... didn't sound mad. A strange undertone of... amusement, you think, colored his tone. Fear and relief flooded your body at once-- relief at the idea that he didn't know any better,
And fear that you'd have to either fess up, or lie to cover your ass.
"I just got here, sir." You said, lying through your teeth. It's moments like these, where the fact he's always wearing sunglasses makes you feel even more nervous then if he wasn't-- because, as it was, he was absolutely impossible to get a read on, expression wise.
Then again, there's no real telling if him losing the sunglasses would help at all-- but it still gave you immense anxiety. Not being able to see the look in his eyes, not being able to see any possible emotion he may hold in them.
A few seconds pass by, spent by internally queueing up your goodbyes to your fellow co-workers-- bracing yourself for the worse, for him the reveal that he knew you were lying; because obviously, he'd know. You were an awful liar, and he'd told you so numerous times before,
Though, always with a sort of fondness in his tone-- the kind he never seemed to spare to anyone besides you. At least when you're present, that it-- could be a completely different story while you out of the room.
...Probably not, given how your colleagues always seem to surprised by how 'soft' Wesker was with you-- it'd gained him the nickname 'momma bird', only whispered when you all know that there's not chance of him finding out about it.
"Hm," He said-- before stepping to the side, pulling the door with him, his arm outstretched, silently inviting you inside. You didn't take it, still so nervous-- had he seen you? did he see through your lie?
"Well then, aren’t you going come in? There is something you wish to speak with me about, yes? Or were you just checking in on my well-being?” Finally, you felt the pressing weight of absolute hopelessness lift from your shoulders, the tension visibly leaving your body all at once.
He quirked a brow at your silence, at your immobility-- you jolted, and nodded enthusiastically, scanning your brain for anything you could possibly talk to him about. You'd just been on your way to lunch-- that was it, you had nothing to speak with him about.
But he seemed... expectant. And you swore you saw a smirk on his face--
Well, it was better not to overanalyze it. You followed his 'invitation' (more like a command) and headed into his office; he gestured to the two chairs opposite of his own bigger, fancier one-- he hadn't picked the chair up from the ground yet, you realize.
You stood there for a moment, before picking it up for him. However, you sit in the other one. He gave you a token "Thank you." Before walking around the desk and sitting in his own chair.
Never in your life had you been so quick to bullshit some random, silly question-- that strange little smirk never left his face, but you opted to ignore it in its entirety. If you kept thinking about it, that'd only serve to make you even more anxious.
You didn't know it-- you didn't know how he was looking at you from beneath the sunglasses, like he was studying you. Like he was planning something-- and maybe if you had, maybe if his eyes hadn't been obscured and you would've somehow caught the concerning glint in them, then maybe you could've saved yourself a hell of a lot of trouble down the line.
Jill Valentine
When you first joined S.T.A.R.S, you and and Jill hit it off in an instant-- getting along like a house on fire, Chris jokingly remarked.
You could either be on Alpha or Bravo team, but no matter what, Jill latched onto you like nobodies business. Showing you around the office-- at times hijacking the tour your boss was giving, just so she could give it herself. She always got away with it because she was so enthusiastic about it.
If you were on Alpha team, she'd constantly be pairing up with you during missions; no doubt about it, she's keeping you as close as humanly possible. You don't have a choice in it.
Now, if you were apart of Bravo-- she'd definitely try to change that, to put a good word in for you to Wesker... only to get shot down, and for him to tell her that you were right where you were supposed to be. And unless you showed a 'great deal of talent he otherwise hasn't seen', then you would stay with the Bravos.
Suddenly, after that conversation, she started to drag you from your desk and take you to the shooting range-- like, daily. She'd try her best to help you improve anyway she could, including (but certainly not limiting) how to handle a gun, how to properly utilize a melee weapon against both an unarmed and armed perp, hand-to-hand combat, how to pin someone bigger than yourself down and keep them down,
and of course, her Specialty, lockpicking. You took to it like a fish to water, she said-- it was by far what you were best at among the things she tried to teach you at the point, and she could barely contain her glee at that fact.
However... it was a completely different story for the other things she tried teaching you. The kinds of skills that you develop naturally over an extended period of time, over multiple missions. Something you can't just... learn.
You weren't skilled enough in aim to hold a gun like she tried to teach you to, and in the same vein-- you weren't skilled enough in handling the gun to use the tips and tricks she gave you for aiming.
It was like a never ending cycle, where you couldn't do one thing, and when she tried to target it form another angle-- that didn't work either, because you couldn't do the first thing.
It was extremely frustrating for the both of you, particularly Jill. She did great at not showing it, though. She was all smiles as she gave you a pat on your shoulder, and said you'd get it eventually.
Eventually was the keyterm-- but Jill refused to believe that'd it'd take any longer than two weeks tops to get you up to Alpha team status.
That, evidently, did not happen. She had to switch tactics, and came up with the idea of doing more joint missions with Bravo.
Jill is very... protective, and at first, you thought nothing of it. You saw it as normal for this line of work, for her to be watching your back-- always checking in on you after missions, trying to push you to be your best, so on and so forth.
But then, you started to notice just how... far she could go with it. Apparently, if she was in the office and you were out on a mission-- she wasn't able to get anything done, and all she could do was just wait for you.
Her captain-- the head honcho, someone you don't like interacting with all too much out of pure, unexplainable primal terror at his very presence, often referred to her as 'your dog', 'your guard dog', your 'lap dog', or something else along those lines.
You wanted to tell him to stop, that it was degrading to Jill and just plain rude-- but you were too scared to stand up to him. It was silly, how a S.T.A.R.S member-- even if you were apart of the secondary team-- could go on missions and be just fine, but tremble at the idea of asking your boss to 'please stop calling your employee, my co-worker and friend, a dog'.
However, when he'd say it in front of Jill, she never seemed too bothered by the title.
If anything, she looked proud to be labeled as your guard dog-- one time, you asked her about it. Asked if it bothered her, and told her that if need be, you could probably sic the regular RPD police captain on Wesker if she was too afraid to speak up against it (God knows you were).
That conversation... didn't go how you were expecting it to. Actually it didn't go anywhere, not by your measures at least.
Jill laughed, said "Oh, that's just how he is!" and then completely switched topics, asking you if you'd watched Blade yet-- and if you wanted to tag along to the theaters with her to see it.
You didn't have the heart to steer the conversation back, so you just let her dodge it. But hey-- at least you got to see a movie out of it? Granted, she was probably going to ask you anyways, but still. It takes away a bit of the guilt you have for not pushing the issue, weirdly enough.
At some point, whether or not you get on the Alpha team doesn't matter anymore-- because somehow, for a completely archaic reason that nobody (including yourself) but the two main people involved could figure out, Wesker begins planning and executing more joint missions between the two teams.
It'd be a good thing, if you could just believe that this was entirely the A team captain's doing-- of course with the involvement of your captain as well, but he was much less involved from what you could tell.
But the thing is-- you just couldn't bring yourself to believe it. The proud, almost victorious looks Jill kept giving you on the first few joint missions-- like the cat who caught the canary, or a gladiator who just won the match of the century-- made you question if the decision had laid solely on Wesker.
During this joint missions, Jill was hard-pressed to let you out of her sight. Even when your captain suggested the teams go opposite ways; you always stuck behind. Maybe because you didn't want to worry Jill,
Or maybe, just maybe, it was because of the way her grip tightened on your hand, arm, shoulder-- wherever she was holding you-- tight enough to bruise (if you didn't have your tactical gear on, of course).
Whatever the reason was, whether it be one of the two, or an unseen third option, you never split off with you team on these joint missions.
Neither captains said anything of it-- sure, Marini would give either Wesker or Jill a strange, almost suspicious, look-- but he never commented on it. At least, he never commented on it with you.
It was strange, yes, but you chocked it up to her history in the military-- for lack of a better reason. Maybe she saw a rookie in need of help, and took it upon herself to help you any way she could; that much was evidenced by her rigorous training sessions she'd been subjecting you to until the joint missions started up.
But still, it didn't feel like... that. It didn't feel like she was simply a co-worker-- you saw her as a friend, and you're sure she felt the same about you; she never seemed to have viewed you as her subordinate, like you'd viewed her as your superior for a(n albeit short) amount of time.
You and Jill hung out all the time outside of work, completely unrelated to S.T.A.R.S at all-- movies, skating rinks, and carnivals; anything and everything interesting happening in and around Raccoon City, Jill was always sure to drag you along.
Then, it escalated to hanging out at each others apartments/homes. More often than not, it'd be her place-- it was nicer than yours, an actual home and not just a residence. There were pictures and posters hung up all over the place, her own personal touch having reached every corner of the apartment.
Sometimes, you'd forget how you met her-- that she was really just a co-worker, at the end of the day. You were fresh out of training, slapped right in the workforce, where you'd met Jill. You don't know how these things work, in all honesty, you never quite understood how to make friends past the kindergarten way of going up to someone, hand extended, and straight-up asking "Wanna be friends?"
Eventually, you progressed to practically living with Jill. It was unofficial-- but with how many sleepovers you two had, you were barely at your own place anymore. Hell, you had your own toothbrush at her place!
She didn't comment on it much-- the one time she did, you two were camped out in her living room; the couch pushed back, chairs pulled from her kitchen table and various sheets and blankets draped over them; pillows and cushions below, along with more blankets.
A pillow fort, to say the least. Right in front of her big CRT TV-- you were watching X-Files, something Jill had expressed interest in started, but only wanted to if you started with her.
You were dropped right at the start of Season five-- there was a marathon going, preparing for the new season that was preparing to release 'soon' (it never said a specific date, just an ominous 'soon' was all the network could afford at this point), but you two picked up on the little bits and pieces pretty quick, piecing it together with things from previous seasons that'd you'd hear here and there from others.
both of your were laying on your stomachs, propped up by pillows so you could 'sit up' comfortably, your arms braced against the floor, while Jill was more or less laying down, her chest resting on her folded arms as she watched the TV diligently.
When it cut to commercial, she turned to you, and out of the blue, just...
"When I was a kid, I always wanted a sibling, y'know?" You turned to face her, and hummed in acknowledgement, "Oh?" You said, prompting her continue the thought.
She turned back to the TV, mindlessly staring at the Mr Clean ad playing at the time-- but it was obvious her mind was elsewhere, she probably didn't even register when the ads switched, or what it had switched to.
"Yeah," She started off with, as the ad transitioned to Taco Bell "A little one, specifically. One I could share clothes with, give advice to," She turned to you again, a sly little smile on her face as her arm reached out and lightly-- playfully, barely any force behind it-- pushed you.
"Sleepovers in the living room-- all that jazz. The stuff they showed on TV and I read about in Babysitters Club." You felt a smile break out over your own face-- a warmth blooming in your chest.
Maybe this wasn't normal for co-workers-- to view each other as family, just like you two did; but you didn't care. Whether or not it was a normal thing remained unseen by you, but even if it wasn't...
You wouldn't trade it for the world.
...Even if Jill got a little too protective at times-- acting more like those dads in films, that'd come to greet their daughters prom date with a shotgun in hand and a violent threat on their tongue than the sister figure you viewed her as.
On one of your more low stakes joint-missions, one where you all had to track down a group of lost frat boys from the local university (who'd gotten turned around in the local forest while high, and cried about zombified dogs hanging around when you'd found them), one of the aforementioned frat boys had the grand idea of hitting on you.
His bad pick-up line was cut short as a gun shot whizzed by you two-- just narrowly missing his head, and loading itself into a tree about 30 feet back.
Understandably, he started freaking out-- he pointed to Jill, and yelled about how she tried to kill him. Wesker shot her a glare-- you think he did, couldn't really tell with the sunglasses, but the way he tilted his head gave you that vibe-- and Jill just shrugged her shoulders.
"I thought I saw a wolf." Was all she gave for an answer-- flimsy at best, an obvious lie at worst. Wesker let it go, though-- to your knowledge. Sure, he told her "This'll have to go in the report.", but when you read over the report later-- there was no mention of the shot Jill took at a 'wolf' during that mission.
After the mission was over and you'd got the group back to where they were meant to be, she threw her arm over your shoulder-- pulling you close and saying "That's why I don't like dealing with these college-types all too often, they always do this. Don't let 'em walk all over you though, 'kay? You deserve better than that." before she pushed off, leaving you with that... cryptic piece of advice.
It was a good piece of advice-- don't get me wrong! Jill was just... like that sometimes, giving you cryptic, almost archaic in nature, pieces of advice before bouncing off to somewhere else-- smiling like nothing was amiss.
maybe to her, it wasn't. But to you, these behaviors of hers weren't getting rather concerning. Maybe because they were becoming more frequent, or maybe because they were getting more intense. A mix of the both, honestly.
Still, you didn't confront her about it.
You kept having sleepovers with her-- to the point where you like, actually lived with her. You don't even remember what color your bedroom walls in your apartment were-- or even what the kitchen looked like.
Eventually, she asked you to move in with her. Saying it'd be easier, since you were basically wasting your money-- paying rent for a place you hardly ever visit anymore. Not many of your things remain, most were packed up and placed in Jill's guest/storage (or, what was once her guest/storage room, but you'd now taken it over) room. You could probably get all the stuff left in one trip-- except maybe the furniture, but even then, the furniture wasn't too much of a loss.
You'd be surprised what college students will put out on the curb at the end of the school year-- or, to be more specific, the private university students. Still, you were a little proud that nearly 95% of your furnishings had come from that method-- walking along the alleyway of streets with a lot of rental places for the local university's students.
It was a logical step and you knew it, officially moving in with Jill, that is. But the way she worded it was... odd.
"C'mon, what am I good for if I don't help out family?" She could've meant that figuratively-- if anyone else said it, then you would've defaulted to that;
But knowing Jill, that just wasn't the case. Hell-- you got called Rookie Valentine by one of the regular cops just a couple weeks ago, and when you went to correct them-- they just laughed and brushed you off,
"Fightin' with ya sister, huh? I used to do that-- with my dad, 'a course. Deny my last name 'n all that." Then, the cop gave you a pat on your shoulder and walked by you "Whatever you're upset about, it'll blow right over; trust me, bonds like you's two have don't go away like that."
Maybe it was stupid-- how quickly you folded, simply nodding your head; within a second or two, Jill had practically flown into you, her arms outstretched. She pulled you into a tight embrace. You reciprocated it-- no reason not to, after all.
But... hey, at least you don't have to deal with your landlord anymore, yeah?
Chris Redfield (and claire)
In some ways, Chris and Jill act pretty similarly when it comes to you. In others, they were near opposites.
For example, If you happened to be on Bravo Squad, he would much rather have you stay there indefinitely. He knows how mentally and physically tiring the Alpha team's work can be compared to Bravo's, which were pretty much just backup, in simplest terms.
He'd want to distance you as far away from Alpha teams work as he could manage. There's not point in putting you through that-- his way of protecting you is shielding you from it all by keeping you uninvolved, where Jill would much rather prefer to have you involved, by keeping you right next to her at all times.
You two hit it off the moment you stepped into that office- of course you did, who didn't get along with Chris? He was a literal ray of sunshine, and every morning, you couldn't help but look forward to that beaming smile he'd always give you once he spotted you.
It was normal-- run of the mill. You two were just friendly in a way co-workers were friendly; you saw yourself as no different then everyone else, when it came to how Chris treated you.
But it was small things-- at first, but they began to pile up, and up, and up-- until you couldn't help but notice them. It's not like you're painfully oblivious to everything,
...Just this, you reason with yourself. Listen, it's not your fault you didn't realize you were a special case to Chris! You thought it was normal, how he'd always drop by your desk when you both had morning shift, and slide a muffin, danish, a doughnut-- whatever he'd gotten that day, over to you.
He'd always check up on you, make sure you were eating properly-- he didn't try to cover it up either, didn't try to pull the tried-and-true "You need the proper nutrients to do your job well!", he just straight up admitted that he wants you to be healthy. No ulterior motives-- just... wants you to take care of yourself, because that's what you're supposed to do, for your own good.
He's a very caring person-- you assumed that he had this same level of caring for everyone in the office.
One time, when Claire swung by the office during her winter break-- she immediately beelined it to your desk. It was a little intimidating, because for a split second, you didn't know who she was; to be honest, you were a little afraid she was here to yell at you for messing up on a mission somewhere along the line; either as a civilian or a higher up, even though she didn't seem too far in age from yourself.
But as soon as it clicked-- right before she got up to your desk, that she just had to have been Claire Redfield, Chris' younger sister, you relaxed just a bit. She was probably just introducing herself to the newest addition; after all, most everyone else seemed to know her personally, or have at least met her once or twice before.
She was pretty nice, actually-- you two had a good conversation, and you're pretty sure you left a good first impression on her. But meeting her-- how she greeted you for the first time, was what tipped you off to the fact that no, Chris does not go out of his way to make sure all his co-workers are eating well, or keeping up with a solid sleep schedule like he does to you.
"Hey, you're the new addition to the family, right?" is what she said, word for word. At first, you thought nothing of it; thinking that she was referring to S.T.A.R.S as a family-- Jill did that pretty often, and you'd caught Chris doing the same a few times before.
You nodded, and you two got to talking. She was nice to talk to-- lively and animated, and you found yourself falling into a comfortable sort of routine. It was as if you'd known each other your whole lives-- she knew a lot about you, but just stuff that you'd told Chris, or he'd picked up on in passing.
"Does he talk about me a lot?" You remember asking, anxiety tinging your tone. Claire clocked it immediately, and leaned over slightly, from where she was sitting atop your desk; and gave you a pat on your shoulder, as you sat in your office chair.
"Hey, don't worry about it. It's all good things, and you sure as hell live up to how much he hypes you up during our calls." Yeah, you remember Chris saying he called his sister as often as he could. You were always impressed by how family oriented Chris could be. It was sweet, how often he'd talk about his sister.
A little bit of weight eased off your chest, as you let out a breathy little laugh "Hah-- that's good." You felt a little silly for being worried about it. Of course Chris told Claire about you, he's proudly boasted before that he tells her everything-- you were sure he treated the others no differently.
Even if you weren't on the same team as him. Even if, more often than not, he had to go out of his way to interact with you. You're sure Claire heard a lot more about the newest Alpha recruit-- you'd never spoken in depth with them, just passing "Hello"'s and "Good morning"'s as you pass each other on the way to your respective sections of the S.T.A.R.S office.
When there was opening in the conversation, you casually asked "Do you know anything about the new Alpha team recruit? I think their birthday is soon, and I want to get them a card." You were trying to take a page out of Chris' book-- being nice to everyone, going out of your way. It was a small operation in the grand scheme of things, S.T.A.R.S. It was best to try and make everyone feel at home.
Claire paused, her brows furrowed "...There's a new Alpha recruit?"
Why did that give you such a bad vibe? Why did it feel like an ill omen, you'd asked yourself at the time-- you quickly responded, unease curling in your gut for a reason you couldn't quite place at the time.
"Uh-- yeah, his name is... Mark, I think. He joined about a month ago, from what I know. Tall guy, ginger hair, seems to be in his mid to late 20s." Even as you described the man-- a very distinctive person, you think; there was no flash of recognition in Claire's eyes.
Claire seemed to think it over, before shaking her head slowly "No-- I don't think Chris has ever mentioned a Mark."
"Huh..." You said under your breath-- never mentioned him? They work together, on the same team-- you haven't been here much longer than Mark has. It set off alarm bells in your head, that he told Claire so much about you, and yet... she didn't even know Mark was with you guys in the first place.
There was a beat of tense silence between you two, then another-- until Claire suddenly said "How do you feel about roller skating?", obviously trying to divert your attention from the matter at hand.
You let her-- and you two fell into a conversation about roller skating, that eventually progress to ice skating, skateboarding, surfing-- those kind of activities/sports.
It had to have been at least an hour and a half before Claire got pulled away-- Marini approached you two, and shooed Claire off, like, literally. Made the motion with his hands and everything, as he told her "Redfield, you're distracting my team member. Go bug your brother."
Claire huffed, rolling her eyes as she pushed off your desk "Yeah, yeah. I'm going." It surprised you-- how casual she was with Marini, and disrespectful. But, she doesn't work under him, so you guess she has nothing to fear with upsetting him, since he isn't her brother's superior either.
...You just hope she's a little more delicate with Wesker.
Before leaving, she gave a quick little side hug, and told you "Catch you later, okay? It was nice meeting you.", you nodded and smiled, returning the hug best you could "Same goes for you. It was nice talking to you."
Claire laughed as she pulled away, giving you a light, playful punch in your shoulder "Hey, no need to be so formal. We're family now, I won't gut you for talking like an actual person.", Marini cleared his throat, and Claire rolled her eyes again-- leaving without another word to either of you.
She did, however, give you a little smile a wave, before she headed over to the A team's part of the office.
'we're family now', she said. Did that mean anything, or were you just overthinking it? She was just being friendly, you told yourself-- the Redfield's did this with everyone, you assumed.
After that, you and Chris started to go from work friends-- co-workers who were friendly with eachother, to actual friends. The first time you two hung out outside of work, was in a quaint little 24/7 diner near the RPD station.
The two of you had gotten off at the same time, 10 PM-- and Chris had dragged you along with him, saying that he wanted to get to know you more, without Marini or Wesker showing up at any given moment and telling their respective members to get the hell back to work, or for the member of the other team (often Marini to Chris) to leave the other alone, so they could do their work.
Chris always took it with a laugh and a smile-- but... well, it was stupid, you think. That look in his eyes couldn't have meant anything-- you'd never seen him look like that, but it was scarily close... hatred? No, irritation, it had to be. You don't think Chris is capable of hatred directed towards anyone short of a war criminal, in all honesty.
But at any rate, it's still an odd idea-- Chris being irritated at someone who isn't in the wrong. Objectively, Marini was doing nothing wrong; he was your boss, and he wanted you working while on shift.
But the way Chris would look at him suggested otherwise, like Marini had just kicked his dog or burned a belonging of his.
It was weird.
You forced yourself to-- well, not get used to it per se, the weirdness of it never went away, but you tried not to dwell on it too much. Tried to ignore it best you could, and while it was difficult, more often than not you could manage just fine.
Anyway-- it went well, hanging out with him at the diner. It was fun, and light-hearted; no imminent threat of the fun being broken up by a mission for work (while the chances weren't necessarily zero, they were very low while you two were off the clock-- unless it was like, a world ending sort of deal. if that was the case, then you'd have more problems at hand then getting called into work abruptly...), just you, Chris, and the local family diner that was done-up to look like a time capsule of idealized 1950s Americana.
He dropped you off back home-- insisting that you don't walk home so late. After that-- after he learned that you walked home after every shift, come rain or shine, and despite the time of day (or night), you always walked.
When Chris realized this-- every time you got off shift together, whenever he was available; he'd drive you home. You thought it was sweet, but... confusing to say the least.
Surely, he'd do the same for anyone else, right?
As the months passed and your friendship progressed-- where you hung out almost every weekend, completely unrelated to work in any capacity, it hit you like a ton of bricks that Chris wasn't just like that. Not to the level he was with you-- yes, he was kind and accommodating to everyone, but wasn't going above and beyond for anyone but you.
But... why? What was so special about you? How come he didn't do this for other new recruit-- that joined not so long after you, who was on his team. He definitely naturally sees/runs into the guy more then he sees you in passing.
It just didn't make sense, and no matter how much you thought and thought about it-- it never managed to get any better. You never understood it any further, and you all but gave up on trying to understand the reason behind it.
You could ask Chris about it, but then that'd be awkward, and you don't want to deal with that-- you don't want to seem like you're coming at him or anything. It might just be because you're younger, so assumed that sort of mentor role because he was in that position one?
By now, you've come to terms with that. That it doesn't make sense, and you'll probably never be able to make sense of it on your own-- and you were too scared of upsetting Chris to actually ask the guy.
So you kind of just... stuck in a loop. But that's fine-- because you had things to distract yourself with! Like your hobbies, and work, and hanging out with your friends;
...Maybe not the last one, thought. For some reason, all of your other friends have all but dropped off the face of the earth. You tried reaching out to one--
Only to find out that they were... in jail. It was a minor offense, but still. That wasn't like them at all-- it'd been their sister to pick up the call, and you'd been subjected to a very, very heated telling off by her.
She seemed to think it was your fault, that you sicced 'your brother' on them for some perceived slight-- one that you couldn't think of, and neither could she.
You tried calming her down, but it only ended with the call abruptly ending-- her screaming at you to "Leave my family alone! Yours has done enough damage to ours ot last a lifetime!"
Then it was over.
Whether or not you have brothers-- you know that couldn't be right. If you did have brothers, then you know they wouldn't-- or just didn't have the means to-- lock your friend up in jail for... whatever it was, you think it was some traffic related violation.
Something that you know can be easily staged-- Marini had told you so before, as you sorted through some old cases. These sorts of violations were usually a dead giveaway that the recipient had pissed off a cop, who wasn't above faking an offense to get back at them.
You could only think of one person who'd possibly fit that weird description-- Chris was sort of a brother to you, in loose terms. He acted brotherly with you, is what you'd like to call it.
Really, you want to confront him about it, but you don't have enough evidence.
He wouldn't do something like that, yeah? He's a good guy, he wouldn't fuck up someone's life by wielding his position of power over them for no reason at all. It had to be unrelated-- just a weird set of coincidence. You don't think you've ever told Chris about that friend, so how would he even know about them?
You didn't bother reaching out to your other friends-- hoping they'd reach out to you. It was stupid, your fear of getting an earful from a pissed off family member again-- or getting blamed for whatever happened.
So you just... well-- you wouldn't call yourself a coward, but Chris couldn't be it. He just wouldn't have done something like that, especially without clear reason-- it couldn't have been him.
Again. Nothing made sense-- it hurt, knowing you'd probably lost a treasured friendship for something you don't know anything about,
But at least Chris is there to ease your ills, right? At least he answered your phone call at 10 PM, and stayed with you for an hour after that, comforting you as you cried and told him that you didn't know what was going on.
he was so genuine as he comforted you-- even over the phone, which you knew had to be harder to do than comfort someone face to face-- that you ended up letting it go.
You ruled out the idea that Chris had been behind it all-- maybe because you really didn't think it'd ever been a viable explanation,
Or maybe, deep down, you know Chris could-- if pushed far enough-- probably be capable of something like that. Despite how you interact with each other, how you talk like you've known each other your whole lives, you'd known each other for under a year by that point.
But you selfishly hoped-- and presented this hope as fact to yourself-- that he didn't do it, because he really was one of your closest friends; especially since everyone else drifted away from you.
You couldn't lose him too-- or Claire, because you know that if a falling out happens with one, it's sure to follow with the other. They're like that, the Redfield siblings, as you've come to learn.
And you'd rather not be caught on the receiving end of Claire's world-ending death glare, thank you very much. You don't think you could handle it-- emotionally wise, that is.
Rebecca Chambers
Surprisingly, You'd probably be better suited on Alpha team when it comes to Rebecca.
Still, you probably graduated in the same class as her; however, you weren't a child prodigy like she was. You being older then her gave you leg up in the recruitment process, which landed you in the Alpha team and her in the Bravo team.
You may not have interacted with each other a whole lot during school-- no real reason, you two just never crossed paths all that often.
But after joining S.T.A.R.S at the same time, you two made a sort unofficial pact to stay together; despite being on two different teams, you'd try to look out for each other. For one, you were a little worried about hazing.
Was it a silly thing to be afraid of in workforce? Well, yeah-- but there was still a possibility. If any field of work would incite some sort of frat-esque hazing ritual, it'd be law enforcement!
So you exchanged landline numbers, and kept tabs on each other as much as you could. You took initiative a whole lot, and kept watch on both your and Rebecca's co-workers.
In the end, nothing happened. Obviously-- since there was such a miniscule chance it would, but the 2-3 week period of this, of constantly checking in each other (usually you to Rebecca, since Bravo members tended to be a little less mature on the basis of the less real-world experience and such; and she was young, an easy target in the eyes of people who didn't quite know her), built up a pretty solid rapport with the younger rookie. One that couldn't just easily fall to the wayside.
Even though you're on different teams, you still encounter each other pretty often. At first, it was a practical thing-- you checking up on Rebecca,
Until Rebecca started seeking you out for more normal things. Like to tell you about her latest mission, or a funny thing her captain did-- to exchange stories of your respective team members being absolute goofballs, so on and so forth.
it was nice, these little chats you'd have. They were never very few and far between, not even at the start-- Some were accidental, like bumping into each other in the break room, clocking out at the same time and having a little chat before heading out, so on and so forth.
But as the weeks went on, turning to months of working under the same roof-- If there was ever a moment where she could come find you, you better bet your ass she was there.
From the moment you stepped in the building in the morning, to whenever you came back from a mission; when you were getting ready to leave, Rebecca would do whatever she could to be near you. Sometimes they were conversations-- where you put your own thoughts and whatever into the topic, but sometimes it was just Rebecca explaining something she was interested in, or telling you every single tiny, microscopic detail of a story she'd already told you before.
You never stopped her-- it never hurt anything. Due to her being the youngest, people let her get away with it. As long as both your reports were turned in on time and done well, then what does it matter that you talk to each other while you were at it?
At some point, Rebecca would definitely just pull a chair up and do her work at your desk. Her own desk at the section with the other Bravo members went unused for long stretches of time-- you were fine with it.
Again, it was nice having someone to hang out with. She didn't talk to whole time, most of the time, you two lapsed into a comfortable silence as you did your own reports/paperwork at your own leisure. Sometimes, one of you would pop up with a little comment, spurring a response from the other-- but it never went much further then that, in those moments.
...That's when Marini cut in though. Saying it'd be better for Rebecca to head back to her own space-- to stop bothering you. You tried your damn best to reiterate that "No, she's fine. I swear, I work even better when she's here--" But a quick, withering glance from Marini made you reluctantly shut your mouth.
Rebecca looked heartbroken-- you met her eyes, and tried to convey your apology that way. She didn't look angry or upset with you, just sad about the circumstances. Understanding, that you'd done all you could in the moment, as she grabbed her papers and went to push the chair-- that'd you'd known as her chair for a few weeks by then-- into where it was actually meant to be, in an unused desk right by yours.
Marini was watching the whole time, arms crossed and one eyebrow raised. You saw how Rebecca's hand trembled ever-so-slightly under her captains scrutinizing gaze, and you reached out to pat her hand comfortingly; stopping her in her tracks. "Hey, it's okay. I'll get the chair, you go to your desk, okay?"
She looked up, and you gave her a reassuring little smile. She looked kind of like a kicked puppy-- it tugged on your heart, made you wish you really could do more.
She nodded, and softly said "okay.", and you'd expected her to pull back, to straighten up and walk off. Soon enough, you realized that, for whatever reason, she wasn't moving as long as you kept contact with you.
You removed your hand-- she looked saddened by the loss, but took it in stride, as she turned and trailed after Marini as he (presumably) led her back to Bravo's section of the S.T.A.R.S office.
it's not like they were really separate from each other-- or even blocked off per se, not in a purposeful way. You were just stationed on the far side of Alpha's side, the little dividers interspersed here and there primarily blocked your view of most Bravo team desks.
However, Rebecca's was right on the edge between Alpha and Bravo's unofficial-official sides of the room, and you were able to still look over at her from time to time.
After that-- you considered going to Wesker about it, but you were certain he'd either do nothing, or throw thinly veiled insults your (and indirectly, Rebecca's) way. Something along the lines of "Do you think this is grade school? That I'm a teacher you can negotiate a seating chart with?"
No matter how much you cared for Rebecca, you couldn't bring yourself to face that possibility of the utter mortification that talking to Wesker would undoubtedly bring you.
Two weeks passed, before Wesker pulled you into his office. He told you to sit in one of the two chairs opposing his own.
You bit your tongue, stifling the burning question of "Am I in trouble?" and waited for him to start on his own.
Apparently, Rebecca's performance had been experiencing a sharp decline during you two's times apart. Instead of firing her, Wesker sought to find another route to it.
"Would you say you two are close? Chambers and you?" He asked, and you had to question that yourself-- do you? You certainly see Rebecca as a friend, but a work one. Separate from a 'full-fledged' one, since you only see each other during work.
Finally, after a few suffocating seconds-- sat across from Wesker, his elbow resting on his desk as he held his face in his hand. You could feel him staring intently, even if you were unable to actually see that that was the case.
"Yeah-- I'd say we are. Why?" And then, that's when he told you about her performance, and presenting you with an opportunity that you took readily;
"How about you take a sort of mentor role for her? It seems she's having trouble acclimating to the workforce, which I wouldn't quite blame her for. She may be a child prodigy academically, but ultimately, she lacks the experience someone of your age does."
Immediately, you nodded-- before pausing, and asking "Have you talked to Marini about this?", and Wesker shook his head "No, I thought it'd be best to discuss this with you before going to him. Knowing Marini, he'd probably be less then stoked by this. I wouldn't want to go through the trouble of readying him only for you to decline the offer."
"...Yeah, makes sense." Was all you said-- You stayed there for about 15 more minutes, before being excused.
As you opened his door, a question crossed your mind. On a whim, you turned and asked "How long will it take, do you think?" You feared you might've been too vague at first, but Wesker seemed to know exactly what you meant, answering with his own "It shouldn't take too long at all, perhaps a few days at the most. I'd like to have this system integrated as soon as possible, before Chambers' performance rate drops low enough to where I have to consider letting her go."
You nodded, internally praying to whatever could be out there that she could keep it up for a little longer- long enough for your captain to talk to hers, to get this sort of mentorship up and a running so she can get back on track.
True to his words, three days later, and you walked into the precinct with your desk having been moved around; the empty desk besides yours had been moved, your desk turned sideways and the unused desk pushed to meet with yours.
It was set up to have someone there, no longer empty, it had a lamp, a computer, and some organizers and office supplies on it. Obviously, Wesker had gone through with the mentorship-- and when Rebecca came in a few minutes after you, her bus having been a little slow than usual, she was absolutely ecstatic.
She was talking a mile-a-minute, saying she didn't actually think Wesker would go through with it. In the end, she gave you a celebratory little hug; and you didn't hesitate in returning the favor, wrapping your arms around her and giving her a light squeeze before releasing her,
She took a few moments longer to unwind her arms from your waist, but you didn't mind. You were sure she was happy to be sat next to you.
Wesker never called you in about Rebecca's declining report quality/performance again, and that led you to believe that the issue was completely resolved.
Marini would come over sometimes, pull Rebecca off for a mission or something that needed the entire Bravo team present to hear. Every time, you would see her off with a little encouraging gesture. At first, it was a simple smile or squeeze of her hand-- then, the occasional hug.
But now, she borderline refused to leave with anything less than a hug from you. It wasn't bothersome-- it was comforting, actually.
And all was well and fine for a while-- until Alpha started to be called away for more and more missions, leaving your desk unoccupied more often than not.
While it didn't seem to be taking a toll of Rebecca's work performance, she was looking a little worse for wear. She was always so worried-- you didn't understand it, but you tried your best to be accommodating. The missions you went on were hardly dangerous, sometimes you'd be pulled in to answer a larger scale call about nuisance-- it always got like this around this time of year, Chris had lightheartedly told you before.
Move-in day for the local university brought a lot of traffic offences, and RPD usually outsourced some of these to S.T.A.R.S; rush week brought about a lot of nuisance complaints, frat parties obviously needed to be broken up from time to time-- things that the RPD were meant to do, but their hands got so full that S.T.A.R.S ended up stepping in where need-be.
But what worried you was, as weeks passed by with this uptick in missions, Rebecca was starting to seem so tired. Like she wasn't sleeping properly, and she was stiff and jerky in her movements.
Like she was sore. like she overexerted herself, and you asked her about it. She gave you the same bright, cheery smile as always-- and just said she was training harder than usual.
You didn't have the heart to go any further with it, just telling her "...Okay. Just make sure to take care of yourself, and don't push it, okay?", and she'd eagerly nodded, promising you "I will! Don't worry about me."
That didn't help anything, because she seemed to get worse-- during her off day, you bounced on over to the Bravo team's side of the room, and asked one of her teammates "...Hey, have you noticed anything strange with Rebecca recently? Has she been doing okay on missions?"
And Forest, the one you'd approached-- didn't look too worried at all. "Huh? Oh, yeah! She's been doing great! better than usual, actually." You made a questioning little noise, thinking over what that could possibly entail.
"...Has she been doing a lot of overtime, too?" And Forest paused, thinking about it "Uh... Yeah, I think she has."
"And has she told you why she's doing this?" Forest shrugged, giving you a little smile, none the wiser to Rebecca's less than stellar state, no doubt. "I think she wants to get on your team-- I know she's been hitting up the shooting range more than usual. Probably aiming for a different position than medic, 'cause Alpha doesn't really have a need for it."
Okay that... explained a lot, but did nothing to ease your worries. You thanked him, before heading back to your own desk; you made up a plan to confront her on it the next day, but the right chance never presented itself.
The first time you two hung out outside of work, was after she collapsed right before heading off. Just... fell right into yourself arms-- exhaustion and overexertion having taken its toll on her. You hadn't been able to ask her about it, before she keeled over from it.
You bit your tongue, preventing yourself from mumbling a little "i told you to take care of yourself..." but decided against it. And you'd stood there for a little while, just holding her-- then, you shook her awake, gently.
"mm?" She questioned, her eyes fluttering, and you asked "Rebecca, how do you get home? Do you walk or take the bus?" You don't feel good about leaving her on the bus like this-- hell, you don't even know if they run this late, the clock hung on the wall shining proudly, proclaiming it to be 11:07 PM.
But if she walked, you literally wouldn't ever forgive yourself if you made her go through that in a state like this. She mumbled her answer-- Walk.
Goddamnit.
"...I'm gonna have to drive you home, you okay with that?" She huffed, and leaned further into you. "'Kay." It's not like you feel good about this either, per se, it was just the best option at the time.
So, you carefully set her in the passenger seat of your car, buckled her in, shut her door and headed to your own side. You managed to get an address out of her-- a better part of town, thank god, so that made you feel at least a little better.
Through the whole thing, you had to keep yourself from trying to poke and prod about it all. About her pushing herself to her limits-- seemingly to join your team. It made you feel bad, guilty; as if you were the cause behind it.
Realistically, you probably were.
When you got to the quaint little one-story rental Rebecca resided in, you were just as careful to get her out of the care as you had been to get her in.
You helped her along and up to the porch; she took out her keys, but just before inserting them, asked you to stay. That she'd feel more comfortable if you stayed. You got a closer look at her face, under the glow of her automatic porch light, and realized how she was a little... thinner.
"Yeah, but I'm gonna make you some food. That okay?" You tried to frame it as a command at first-- but went back on yourself mere moments later. This was her house after all-- if she didn't want you cooking, then you couldn't do much about it.
She gave you an almost... mischievous little smile before chirping back an "Okay. That's fine by me." Before inserting the key and letting you two in.
You ended up cooking her something simple-- it wasn't a problem of she didn't have the food, that she wasn't eating. She just either forgot to between all the training, or didn't have the energy to make anything. That's okay-- you suppose you understand it, even if it was to such an extreme that you worried deeply for the younger S.T.A.R.S member.
And then, she asked you to stay the night. You two set up camp in the living room, with you on the couch and Rebecca on the trundle-esque pullout below; and watched some late-night TV (namely Murder, She Wrote; which put you right to sleep no matter what). When you two woke up-- you'd been the first to rise.
You were stiff from sleeping in your work clothes; it was off day, thank god, but it wasn't Rebecca's. Despite any apprehension you might have about it, you got up and set yourself to getting a good breakfast ready for her. You let her sleep as long as possible, before nudging her awake, a plate of pancakes in one hand, and some maple syrup in your other; since she had the half-used bottle on her countertop, beside of ready-made pancake mix, your assumed she was pretty fond of the breakfast food.
her eyes lit up, and sprung up to hug you-- the plate almost slipped from your hand, but you managed to narrowly escape tragedy as you readjusted your grip, and hugged her back best you could, with your hands full and all.
You pushed the trundle bed back into the couch while she added syrup to her hearts content, then you two sat down.
Really, you wish you could've just let her eat in peace-- but you had to confront her about the cause behind your impromptu sleepover. You two had a long, productive talk about it; about how she should care for herself more.
It ended in a truce, where she wouldn't do so much overtime or train so much it exhausted her, if you two hung out outside of work hours. Because at the core of it, that's why she'd wanted to get on Alpha. So she could be with you, even on missions.
You thought it was sweet.
And in a way, it was-- but... maybe not as textbook sweet as one would assume. You two were nearly inseparable, joined at the hip less than a month later. You stayed over at each other's places a lot-- and you started to view her as more than a friend, far more like family than anything.
You had silly fights-- bickered over dumb stuff that didn't mean anything in the end, you play fought, you poked fun at each other; really, it was no fault of passerbys to think you two were a pair of siblings; that you were her older sibling as you helped her tie her ice skates before you two went out on the rink.
That wasn't the problem-- you didn't mind it. However, you did start to notice how people seemed to... swerve you two. How you became more and more isolated, little did you know, that was entirely on purpose.
Rebecca cared for you a lot-- cared for you like an older sibling. She just wanted to keep you safe-- can't get hurt if she's the only one you interact with, right?
38 notes · View notes
yannaryartside · 2 days ago
Text
Michael and Sydney: let yourself be
Tumblr media Tumblr media
I just had this thought; I hope I can make sense of it. I want to talk about the show"s themes on what allows people to be themselves, pursue their dreams, and defend their identity, particularly amid toxic and abusive elements (family, industry, surroundings).
Long post under the cut, a yappy, unorganized meta. tw discussions of depression and addiction.
If you had to go on personality alone, what character would you say is the opposite of Michael? Michael was an outgoing guy who would command the attention of a room, making sure to read everyone and dial all situations. You may think Carmy is his opposite (we will talk about him later).
But in reality, the character who is shown to struggle with social situations the most throughout the whole show is Sydney.
Sydney has struggled with her leadership skills (commanding a room) and her ability to dial social situations (hiring new staff, dealing with the berzatto antics) for 3 seasons now.
And I think that is pretty interesting. These characters were constructed in a certain way, and there may be an extra theme in the background here: the audacity to be real to the world and to yourself.
Michael spent most of his life pretending to be a version of himself that could carry out his role in the family. He was the glue that kept the family feeling like family, making gatherings enjoyable, minimizing Donna's faults, and bringing everyone together. Is it possible that Michael never had a chance to show his real feelings growing up, and that is likely the reason he learned to use drugs to manage his emotions and hide his depression (because living a lie 24/7 has a toll on the heart).
Tumblr media Tumblr media
He had a genuine talent with people (the same one Richie has), but he slaved himself into the role of "glue of the family," preserving the toxic systems around him and, more importantly, never recognizing how that dynamic had hurt him so much. He never gave himself a chance to dream his own dreams, maybe because he was afraid of being nothing without the role he had been fulfilling for so long. In that family restaurant, the one his father left behind, the same way he left him behind, the restaurant he desperately wanted to keep his siblings out of. He was protecting them, and he was also hiding.
(pause to cry, I love Michael so much)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Sydney is a person who is always herself; she has her heart on her sleeve and shows who she is and what she cares about constantly despite being brought down over and over again. Despite how much it hurts her, she doesn't want do do things in a way that is contrary to her nature and values. When presented with the toxicity of the kitchen (that Michael used to run and that Carmy made even worse), she battles fire with little drops of water (patience and firmness) that build up to create the ambiance of trust within the staff today.
Sydney wanted to make a difference because she believed everyone has a chance to do better. And Michael thought it was his duty to keep things the same, despite how awful it all was even to himself.
He believed in Carmy's potential to the point of excusing his belief that he could never do better than what he had done.
This is also illustrated by the show of how much the staff felt threatened by Sydney in s1, because they believed (kinda like Michael) that they never could be better of what they had, that there is no better, not for people like them. Better is for geniuses and people without baggage.
They believed change would prove them inadequate, and Sydney showed them the chance is to support you, not destroy you.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT THE WORST PART OF THIS IS?
Neither of them had any choice. Yes, we are all creatures of fault with a chance to change, but 75% of our being is preprogrammed. We are the people that we have built ourselves to be to survive in the world around us.
Sydney had a chance to let herself be and Michael didn't.
Sydney had an incentive (a loving parent) to recognize her own feelings and identity growing up. Michael didn't. Despite how flawed she may feel, at least she knows the basics of who she is; Michael could never look at himself and his wounds because that would be admitting he didn't want to play his usual part anymore in the facade that was the happy Berzatto family.
Both the Berzatto and the Adamus are working class (besides mafia links that may have put them in a financial crisis). Yet, Mr Adamu can encourage her daughter to follow her dreams in an industry as unreliable as fine dining. Meanwhile, Michael was told: "you are gonna do the same shit as your father because that is what you are supposed to do"
My last point is back to the dinner and the party afterwards.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
It is not an accident the most confident we have ever seen Sydney is at a table surrounded by mentors and peers. She values her experiences and dreams and is eager to share, be nurtured, and nurture others. That is the basis of connection. You cannot connect if you are hiding.
Carmy was in the same party, hiding in his fear of his abuser, and previously, he had desperately tried to fit in the frat party to the point of pretending to be someone else. Carmy pretends to be Michael, but Michael never allowed himself to meet his true self.
27 notes · View notes
zeroseuniverse · 7 hours ago
Text
Idiot in Love
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Word Count:562 Summary: Nice disguise, loser. Pairing: Jake X Fem Reader
Jake was not jealous. Nope. Not even a little.
…Okay, maybe just a tiny bit.
Look, it wasn’t his fault. She was the one who decided to dress up all cute and go out with some random guy while he was still very much in love with her. What was he supposed to do? Just sit at home and not spiral about it?
Which is how he ended up here—hunched over in a booth at the campus café, wearing the most questionable disguise of all time: a hoodie pulled low over his face, fake glasses (which he absolutely did not need), and for some ungodly reason, a baseball cap. Indoors.
If anyone asked, he was not spying. He was just… observing.
From three tables away.
Sunglasses on.
Like a complete idiot.
Jake tapped his fingers against the table, watching as she laughed at something. His jaw clenched. Who was this guy? Did she actually like him? Did he make her laugh like that before?
His phone buzzed. A message in the group chat.
[Jay]: Why is Jake wearing a hat and sunglasses inside?[Sunghoon]: Is this another bad life choice or am I missing context?[Niki]: It’s giving ex-boyfriend in shambles.
Jake groaned, ignoring them and instead, doing what any sane, mature person would do—he texted her.
[Jake]: You could at least pretend to be heartbroken.
Across the café, she picked up her phone and smirked. Then, slowly—too slowly—she turned her head toward him.
Jake froze.
The second her eyes landed on him, her smirk widened. She knew.
Her response came a second later.
[Her]: Nice disguise, loser.
Jake cursed under his breath, yanking his hood lower. Busted.
[Jake]: You weren’t supposed to see me.[Her]: Yeah, because a baseball cap and sunglasses are so inconspicuous.[Jake]: Don’t act so smug. Shouldn’t you be paying attention to your date?
She glanced at the guy across from her and snorted.
[Her]: You mean my project partner?[Jake]: ???[Her]: Yeah, we’re working on a psych assignment. But please, tell me more about how you stalked me for no reason.
Jake sunk lower in his seat.
[Jake]: I didn’t stalk you.[Her]: Then why are you still staring at me?
He immediately looked away.
[Jake]: I wasn’t.[Her]: Liar.
She leaned back in her seat, tilting her head slightly as she watched him. He was so easy to mess with.
[Her]: So… you’re still in love with me, huh?
Jake nearly choked on his own spit.
[Jake]: Shut up.[Her]: Cute.
His ears burned. He needed to get out of here immediately.
But before he could make his escape, she stood up, grabbed her things, and—of course—made a beeline for his table.
Jake barely had time to react before she slid into the seat across from him, propping her chin on her hand. "Well, well, well," she mused. "If it isn’t my mysterious admirer."
"Go away," Jake muttered, face burning.
"Why would I do that? I like having an audience," she teased. "Especially when they’re as obvious as you."
Jake groaned, dragging his hands down his face. "I hate you."
"No, you don’t," she grinned. "You’re still in love with me, remember?"
Jake peeked at her through his fingers, and for a second—just a second—his usual confidence wavered. Because yeah. He was. And from the way she was smiling at him, She knew it too.
23 notes · View notes
vicstarskiez · 16 hours ago
Text
Okay but imagine if Belos HAD been cursed but it wasn’t in any way that would make what he did not his fault. No. No not at all, but instead Evelyn placed such a random curse on him. After sobbing over the corpse of her lover she looks at Philip and curses him with the fate that his undoing and death will ultimately be by the hand of this very bloodline.
For years Philip assumes that the curse is the reason the grimwalkers keep betraying him, but it isn’t, because they aren’t actual members of the bloodline.
He still subconsciously avoids the Clawthorne family though, until Lilith. He remembers her punching him in the past but allows her to be the leader of the emperor’s coven because again: he thinks it’s the grimwalkers
Lilith leaves and that’s fine. The curse is about the grimwalkers.
Hallow Mind happens. Belos’ theory is proven even more by this in his own head.
It isn’t until his final moments, melting in the boiling rain and watching Edalyn Clawthorne— the youngest and last blood related descendent of Evelyn and Caleb— walking towards him to stomp him to death and realizes; THIS was the curse coming to fruition. It was never the grimwalkers.
21 notes · View notes
thewoollyviking · 2 days ago
Text
Wanted to take a point I made in a reblog chain and make it its own post because I feel it put to words something that’s been bothering me about SU and the Diamonds in particular.
The Diamonds did not actually mourn Rose for those thousands of years after the war. And trying to get us to sympathize with their grief while turning around to denounce Rose felt so incredibly tone deaf.
Let me explain a bit why I feel this way…
So, according to the art books, all four Diamonds are rough around 20,000 years old. To give you an idea how old that is compared to irl history…
There are figures early humans carved from mammoth ivory and spear tips carved from flint that were made when the bottom of the North Sea was still a mammoth steppe in Doggerland.
Subtract the time Rose spent on Earth after the war (give or take a few centuries) and assuming the craptastic treatment she endured under the Diamonds has pretty much been the norm for all that time, and she had been abused for roughly 10-12,000 years.
Rose’s abuse predates agriculture and written language.
I. Do not. Give. A single. Chicken. Fried. Fuck. How sad or sorry the Diamonds think they were after losing Rose.
Oooooh booo fucking hooo Blue sulked in the middle of a human zoo Rose never even wanted in the first place.
Yellow knew Rose wanted to spare Earth and apparently thought the best way to honor her memory was to blow it the fuck up.
And White’s first action seeing “Pink” return was to send a mind controlled version of her original Pearl to greet her as a power move. To remind her what happens when she doesn’t control her power.
They didn’t mourn Rose. They mourned the person they wanted her to be.
I struggle to think of any other example of behavior both in the show or just in fiction altogether that’s this self destructive, self righteous, and self entitled.
This wasn’t morning, this was a 5,750 year long temper tantrum from the three of them.
And that’s made all the more clear once they realized Steven isn’t Rose.
Barely a few years after the end of season five and they seem completely unphased by the revelation that Rose really, truly is gone. And that her passing was not the act of some rogue gem, but their own abusive behavior chasing her away and being haunted by personal demons they inflicted on her.
Nope, their only goal now is getting Steven to take her place and live with them.
“Aww Pink’s gone? Gee that sucks. Welp, time to find a new pink!”
Suddenly now that they don’t have some villain to blame for their misfortune, they’re all too happy to sweep it under the rug.
Fuck dude, some people mourn Healthcare CEOs more than the Diamonds actually mourned Rose.
And yet the Diamonds get that nice fairy tale happy ending where they can be quirky space grandmas who think what they’re doing will ever hope to make up for the suffering they caused.
Meanwhile, Rose’s own loved ones feel like they have to apologize for daring to mention her in a positive light and worry they’re making excuses for her.
The Diamonds have been the instigators who made everything worse without fail. They’re the reason Rose came out as such a broken fucking person and yet we’re asked to pass more judgement on her for not being enough of a perfect fucking princess to solve things Steven’s way?
Rose spent her entire goddamn life clawing her way out of that pit of misery but we’re supposed to scoff at her for getting mud on her dress along the way?
What the fuck was the point in showing that Rose spent that lifetime trying to be better to just end it with “maybe her family would be better off if they just stopped thinking about her altogether.”
I still love this show. But I cannot and will not ever be able to rewatch Future.
The Diamonds are a gaggle of entitled, selfish, miserable, wretched hags. All of the grief they endured was entirely their own damn fault and they only have themselves to blame. They do not deserve a single fucking shred of sympathy. Especially not if the show wanted to end with leaving their most notable victim on such a bitter, hateful note.
25 notes · View notes
fcdcdmcmories · 2 days ago
Text
Tumblr media
"... YEAH. I KNOW. DOESN'T MEAN THAT OTHER PEOPLE DO, THOUGH." shaking his head. maybe, she had learned it, but.. did it mean that other people were going to stop coming after her? probably not and.. god, he wished that he could stop shaking, because it would make this a LOT EASIER. he didn't feel like himself. his hands were shaking, he felt fucking destroyed and god-- fuck. he didn't want to bother her with any of this. he didn't want to stand in the way and he didn't want to lose himself and above all, to lose.. this. god, her. them. "NO. YOU KNOW, WHEN I WAS DOWN THERE.. ALL I DREAMED ABOUT WAS YOU. that we got to have a real wedding. that i made the cake. it was.. SOMETHING." maybe it wasn't fair of him to say so, but.. right now, he had needed something to hold on to and he had a feeling that so did she. wasn't that it? "i know, i know, i.. i'm sorry. it's just that down there, they.. you have no idea of the things they said. DID. what they said that they were going to do to you." shaking his head, as he attempted to take some very deep breaths. he wasn't there anymore. he was here, with her. they were together. it was going to be okay. WASN'T IT? ".. i don't know what i believe. okay? HE HAD VOICE RECORDINGS OF YOU THAT HE WAS MORE THAN HAPPY TO PLAY FOR ME. AT A SO CALLED DATE. SAYING YOU WANTED TO GO AWAY WITH HIM. how am i supposed to feel? yes, maybe it was all a lie and god, i hope that it was, but.. but.. you don't know, okay? you. don't. know. WHAT HE DID TO ME. HOW HE GOT IN MY HEAD. IT'S LIKE I CAN STILL HEAR HIM HERE." he shook his head, attempting to brush some of the tears away. she didn't know what he had been through and what he had heard but this wasn't her fault, he knew, but.. scoffing. "because he gave a shit about that during our last talk, where he pretty much made sure i knew i was never going to be good enough for you. I DON'T NEED TO SAY WHO THAT REMINDS ME OF, DO I? he doesn't want you anywhere near me, let alone married to me. suppose he must have been real happy." pederson. how many times had he heard that coming from him, too? enough of it already. oh, now he wanted to throw his hands up. "OH, GIVE ME A BREAK. HE TOOK A LITTLE BEATING FOR HURTING SOMEONE. SO WHAT? POOR LITTLE WILL GRAHAM. while everyone was off cuddling him because of a little paper cut, you... you have no idea of what i saw down there. of what i fucking went through, because if it wasn't me? IT'D BE YOU. IT'D BE THE KID. and unlike him, who you seem to be so keen to defend? i don't sit around and let the people i love get hurt. i protect them." because if it hadn't been him, it would have been gwen. or her. or laney or evie or gabi and.. no. no. "and? don't act like we've not all lost people we love at one point. he's not fucking special. what was i to do? wait around and clap him in the back for the fact that thanks to him, i nearly had to go and tell my daughter her mother was gone? SHOULD I?" because no. no. he knew what that was like. he'd never put evie through it. shaking his head. "if he was in trouble, it's because he deserved it. WHAT KIND OF FREAK DOES WHAT HE DID TO LANEY AND JUST.. LEAVES? MAYBE IT'S TIME YOU ADMIT THAT HE'S NOT THE PERFECT FATHER FIGURE YOU'VE WANTED YOUR WHOLE LIFE. he's not even a good man. there's a reason your father loved him. maybe because he's as fucked up as finn. or worse. neither of them want you with me. surprised they haven't set you up with cooper or randolph yet. and it's fine, cee. honestly, you.. i get it. i knew. i knew what was probably happening up here. THAT YOU HAD PROBABLY MOVED ON. WITH JOE OR ANYONE ELSE, I.." he only laughed. bitterly but he did. "right. rest. when there's a chance i could wake up tomorrow and hear you were taken by them. by joe and his.. employer. NO." stubborn, maybe, but.. but.. but. WHAT ELSE COULD HE DO? / @xtinyslip
Tumblr media Tumblr media
"multiple times is an exaggeration. i learn from my mistakes." she wasn't even going to get into what some of those were because she knew their time was limited. it was precious and she wanted to use it wisely. "parker, i'm already stuck with you for good… as you are me. that's how we like it. now you bring it up…" she did smile, even if she didn't feel like smiling. cecilia wasn't doing that for herself, she was doing that for him. "i do miss you cooking my favorite dishes. we never got a do over on that cake either, did we?" smiling again, and again not for herself. her lips parted, ready to argue, ready to hold his hands even tighter but she didn't. she lowered her hands, keeping the same closeness between them ; not wanting him to pull away altogether. "i won't, not if you don't want me too. you know that i'm right here." it was understandable and yet the realisation of how traumatized he was made her so damn fucking angry. honestly, how dare these people? it may not have worked in her favor that she wasn't always quick to defend herself. it wasn't that she was struggling to do so. after all, joe was full of literal shit. it was just… well, parker may not realise how much information he was providing her but she was learning as much as she could. "… now we know who apparently bugged the apartment. he has never been invited in, that doesn't mean he didn't find another way in but it wasn't with permission. you're not seriously believing any of this?" was he? because it was beginning to sound like an accusation. "… involved in hurting you? don't be outrageous. hurting you is the same as hurting me, and he knows that." honestly, the pain all merged, it all felt the same. "besides, he's been bed ridden. i don't have to defend him to you, you know he didn't do this!" no, will hadn't been behind this, she was that positive on it. on him. "she might be the mother of your kid, but she's the reason will lost his younger daughter." she should have let it go, she should have not acknowledged but it was always going to be a sore subject for cecilia. the nerves that elaine had exposed were still RAW for her as were the scars she had because of it. THIS WAS ON HER NOW? THIS WAS HER FAULT? LIKE SHE DIDN'T FEEL LIKE SHIT ENOUGH. "he required medical assistance, i knew he was in trouble. i had his location. if there was a choice? i would have been with you, wherever you were being held, giving whoever is doing this to you the worst time of their lives! me and paul have been putting every waking moment into finding you! to finding a solution for all this!" how dare he say it was otherwise? that she had made her choice? it was bullshit and she needed to be clear that it was. she did not want him thinking that of her. she actually couldn't believe he did. "you're not in any condition to be telling me what matters. you just get as much rest as donna will allow you to have, eat, build up your strength. hm? you've made it clear to me… this is urgent. YOU CAN'T WAIT." @fcdcdmcmories
20 notes · View notes
trauma-bot · 2 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
sin eater
#sorry its been a minute!!! the horrors. you understand.#anyways yall ready for another gloom tag essay because here we go!!!#im constantly thinking about the ramifications of uzi literally eating cyn and her now being apart of her.#specifically how it impacts uzi mentally. like dgmw i LOVE the silly cyntail shenanigans in fanart (ive also contributed to this) however#when i really think about it in relation to uzi's arc i go crazy insane#uzi is a character who is grasping for control after a lifetime of not having it.#she has no control over how her peers treat her. she has no control over khan neglecting her for reasons that arent her fault.#she quite literally has no control over the solver taking her over and making her do monstrous things against her will#which solidifies her feelings of being a freak monster who everyone was right to outcast and mistreat.#because im Unwell i interpret her calling herself god as a way to convince herself of having control- and to lock away feelings of impurity#if anyone is in control- if anyone is loved and cherished despite any and all wrong doings- its a god.#and that all comes to a head when she eats the heart of cyn thereby destroying the AS- a literal manifestation of a corrupted god- for good#finally taking back control from the entity that had been terrorizing and traumatizing both her and her loved ones. but did she really?#cyn is apart of her now. powerless sure- but that doesnt take away the horrors she wrought previously#and even so- has uzi ever stopped being just a host? do you think shes terrified of cyn regaining power out of the blue?#do you think uzi ever stops feeling like a monster?#“sin eating” was a thing that happened where someone would consume ritual foods to take on the sins of a recently deceased person#thus absolving said deceased person of any sins and putting them onto the sin eater. being a sin eater ensured eternal damnation.#and i just think about that a lot. when applying that (symbolically ofc(somewhat literally. she very much is a cyn eater)) to what uzi did.#“gloom you're reading way too much into this” THE LITTLE GOTH ROBOT. MAKES ME INSANE IN THE HEAD. OK!!!!!#gloom.art#murder drones#murder drones fanart#murder drones uzi#uzi murder drones#uzi doorman#uzi md#md uzi#uzi fanart
324 notes · View notes
dykedvonte · 2 months ago
Note
I was rewatching mouthwashing, and I ended up thinking of the different reactions that Curly and Jimmy had in doing their tasks. How during the scene of Anya evaluating Jimmy and showing dread towards the idea of doing his evaluation, Curly was the one that offered to take it off her hands. He had no issue with adding more to his plate, because he knew - or well, thought, he knew that Jimmy wasn't going to "bullshit" with him since he's known him for a long time. When Anya hands Curly a note from Swansea, Curly goes to check out what the issue is and he takes care of it without a complaint, the only "complaint" he has is how this incident could have damaged the pods. Which is reasonable, those pods are their only way to be saved if anything tragic happens on the ship. However, in comparison to Jimmy being asked to do things, he's passive-aggressive about it. When Anya asks Jimmy if he could help her out with Curly's painkillers, he tells her that people should be worth their titles, specifically using her title as a nurse when she asked him for help and then when she says forget it, since he made her feel insecure, he still goes "Oh no, I'LL take care of it" as if he was doing a chore, a favor for her. Then, there's that part where he blows up at her for things that she didn't even ask him to do - more so the others asked him about it, like the code scanner, him deciding he needed to find the axe for the foam, and then, there's the medicine part (which when she does ask, and she reconsiders - going to do it herself, he takes that away from her). Jimmy complains about the tasks he has to do and he treats it like a big issue, a "woes me" that he has to do this and that - wanting the praise of the capital without actually doing any work. While Curly doesn't complain about it, in fact, he even mentions that he's aware of how well he is doing at his job as a Captain during that cockpit scene with him and Jimmy. If Jimmy only had to do a small amount of tasks to get irritated and annoyed at being captain, while Curly didn't which I feel like encapsulates their personalities. Curly understands what he's doing is a job, it's a responsibility, why would he complain at any point for doing what he's suppose too? Why would he be upset at people asking him to do tasks? While Jimmy on the other hand, isn't used to it at all and it's different to what he's had before and he's realizing that he doesn't actually like doing the work he has too. I just wanted to ramble about it even if it seemed kind of obvious xd
It’s obvious but it is a thing people miss or understate when trying to find parallels in Curly’s and Jimmy’s relationship/personalities.
Like the way people portray it as neither taking responsibility when it is almost split down the middle of Curly taking responsibilities and faults that shouldn’t be his and making himself unequipped to handle the ones that are while Jimmy refuses to handle the responsibilities he has because he wasn’t expecting the work that comes with them.
Not a lot to say but people forget that another thing the game comments on is prioritization of issues and responsibilities and how the guys fail at it in one way or another in the situation.
#this talk of responsibility is more so about me be very annoyed with people acting like Swansea was the most responsible man on that ship#when he immediately takes a break after his intern in stuck in the foam starts drinking the moment he find out the mouthwash is alcoholic#doesn’t tell anyone about the cryopod or explain himself and did nothing about Jimmy either until it was too late#like I’m sorry but he is also the last guy I’d like to hear about responsibility from cause he did just as bad as Curly post crash like he#wasn’t even nice to Anya outside the one conversation we see he was actually just as rude to her as he was Daisuke when they cracked open#the crates and dismissive before hand like I’m getting more mad at the glorification of one guy vs the woman whose doing the most 4 herself#like I get his speech and the recognition of his faults but he still had them and they still were his downfall in the end and part of the#reason Daisuke listened to Jimmy and it’s not his fault that happened but it’s the same way it’s not Curly’s fault Jimmy is like that#but I digress cause people don’t exactly like when we actually discuss the responsibilities the crew mates should’ve and shouldn’t have had#or what they actually did to help cause idk Anya likely would not feel supported by any of them after the fact if they survived like girl#only ever got attention for her problems when they were literally at the worst that’s not helping or taking responsibility like she had to#kill herself to feel some sort of relief also the irony about Curly’s concern about killing herself only#for it to get to the point she actually did because there was no safety for her they all failed her#Swansea would’ve just told her to tell the captain and he’d watch Jimmy and ultimately it would play out the same cause he’s tries to not#get to involved cause he’s old and been through enough already and she’d feel just as unheard like he was closer to Daisuke#and not once after the crash did he really try to steer him away from liking Jimmy which again he points out himself#like I love Swansea and Daisuke but they were just as complacent in Anya’s suffering and Jimmy’s behavior even if they knew less that should#not make them more viable options or it more excusable like crazy conclusions to comes to ig on my part but yall hate#the idea that maybe a major point is that Anya was alone as a woman and overlooked#mouthwashing#ask#mouthwashing game#anon#curly mouthwashing#jimmy mouthwashing
64 notes · View notes
leori-the-unlearned · 1 month ago
Text
the way digimon does conflict/drama between two characters who should be or are close: chef’s kiss <3
the way sonic idw handles creating conflict/drama between two characters who should be or are close: *wilting flower*
#keyword: adding#in digimon conflicts come about as a result of independent viewpoint differences#ie takuya vs kouji. taichi vs yamato#or (since i just watched 02:the beginning) lui and ukkomon’s conflict is SO GOOD#it BUILDS to something. lui and ukkomon’s disagreement builds up to: they need to communicate. they both come from a good-faith angle#ukkomon so desperately wanted to make lui happy and failed to look closer to see what WOULD - and lui didn’t know how to express#what he actually wanted to ukkomon. or try to reach out to ukkomon in turn instead of basking in his life finally going ‘right’#but then not as much in idw gives me that good feeling of ‘ahhh they built to this and it is so nice’#or when conflict is created it isn’t because despite best efforts people clash and have to work together#it’s when someone does a stupid and someone else has to pick it up#it means a lot when you see kouji driven to press takuya to the wall and see them shout at each other#because they both have to realize that with words they will never convince the other of their viewpoint.#even though they both think the way the other looks at things will get the group killed#and of course it makes sense that the group would follow takuya. he’s their heart. their core#takuya’s the reason tomoki stayed in the digital world and junpei and izumi find confidence being there because he’s there rallying them#and in this case that good trait winds up being wrong. he gets everyone captured by the enemy and thinks theyre all better off if he wasn’t#part of the group from the start. but THAT isn’t true either - he just needs a BALANCE of his excellent helpful determination and willpower#and seeing things as they are and not as he believes them to be - more like kouji#he WAS wrong but not for HAVING the traits he had - for leaning too much on them#or (also going to a media im currently engaging in) sundered star. things go bad between people a LOT but it’s not frustrating.#it’s SATISFYING/ENGAGING seeing feferi leave eridan and watching eridan go insane and give in to the horrorterrors. of course it couldnt-#-go any other way for them. eridan wouldnt change until he realized he could lose feferi and feferi wouldnt bring him any real consequences#-to make him consider that until she was leaving and would never come back. and it was never her fault that leaving eridan lead to-#-catastrophe and devastation. it just happened as a consequence anyway#anyways i guess. if i see the characters do their best and things still fall apart it’s better than#seeing an idiot plot or characters written to be worse than they were to make conflict happen#with takuya he wasn’t suddenly bad or misjudging everything. he just didnt have to deal with negative consequences for misjudging before-#-because they hadnt met someone like duskmon that they COULDNT eventually beat before. even gigasmon who wrecked them all at first-#-was beaten once they had beast spirits and were on equal footing. so takuya assumes the same for duskmon without realizing that#they arent on the same level. so the issue didnt come from nowhere - it just comes to a head now
3 notes · View notes
pureconancommentary · 6 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
"We can't do anything"? How about invite her inside your house, Agasa? She's been waiting in the snow for three hours, just standing there doing nothing else, and you just watched and thought 'oh man, that's sad. ...Anyways, shame on you Shinichi'.
I mean, there are other concerns, such as 'how did she arrive to wait for three hours and Conan seems to have only arrived'. If I were to assume, he had to talk with Megure for a little while as Shinichi for case reasons, and then slip away and return to the agency, only to find that Ran wasn't there. Though it also brings up how it'd take three whole hours, and also why Ran decided to wait in front of Shinichi's house in the cold when she'd previously just waltzed inside when she thought he might have gone home. Even now, right when the lights turn on, she just pushes the gate and front door open, so there's no reason we see for why she'd stand there for three hours. She's not even wearing pants, she's in a skirt with long socks, there is no reason to have her do that.
2 notes · View notes
ourceliumnetwork · 9 months ago
Text
it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such
#if i say it enough i will remember it's true#can you guess which aspect of capitalism i'm struggling with today?#it does not help my bones are somehow WORSE than yesterday even after all of the rest i took so that's Super Fun:tm:#so i've got that on in the back of my head#ugh#i... am putting off calling my grandma - i meant to do it last week but i got too in my head about it#and uno reversed myself into forgetting to do it at all until the Worst Times Possible#(generally around Normal Fuckin Meal Times)#i want to call to wish her a belated mother's day and check in re: grandpa but also...#also i don't want to have to do a phone call i don't want to talk to them about anything at all#they stress me out to talk to and it makes me super uncomfortable to be on the phone in general let alone with a Heavy Topic over our heads#like.... i'm comfortable with where i'm at acceptance-wise with Grandpa's whole situation#and i know i am late for a better relationship with the pair of them in general#like i'm not going to repair a relationship that wasn't built to collapse down to this point this is as far as it got built up to#i'm not building more relationship between me and someone who i know is passing soon when they didn't take the opportunity either#like they had just as much chance as me to improve our relationship after i became an adult and they chose to use my mother as#an intermediary which has stunted their connection to me and that's not my fault#i admittedly did not reach out but i was not taught i could safely do that to anyone#because my parents badmouth literally any person they know for one reason or another#i regularly fuck up in conversations with my grandparents because i'll say somethign that is a holdover from my understanding of them#through my parents and it's like. kind of really insulting! and i've been doing it my whole life and i know as soon as i get their reaction#and i can't recover because i don't actually know them at all#so i can't be like ''oh my god i know that's inaccurate i have no idea why i said that'' because i *don't* know until after i've done it#every goddamn time it happened the last time i got a call from them too#like... my bio fam/family of origin is just not good at keeping in touch and i know i'm a product of that#and i know theoretically how to adjust for it but it does require work on the other end of the line too#and unfortunately i know my bio family too well and know they won't do their part#i grew up in the group project everyone hates#and i'm on my way to deciding they can show up to the presentation day without me#i've started a new family project over here with blackjack and hookers
4 notes · View notes
redriverstyx · 1 year ago
Text
turns out i have fasd (fabulous amazing silly disorder) 👍
#all the symptoms except the face thing#but thats actually a misconception and many people with fasd dont have the face#every single symptom matches up#every strength and weakness i have matches#which is kinda sad because it feels like my whole personality is just a Symptom lmfao#but its nice to know that there's a reason why i cant concentrate or do any studying and why im so forgetful n stuff#and im glad i found out so i dont hate myself for the rest of my life#and theres a reason im the way i am#and it isnt my fault#so yeah lol#hey guys im joining the neurodivergent gang wassup#it sucks though that theres no community for us#like with adhd and autism theres like a community because its so well known#but with fasd theres nothing#but there must be so many people who have it cuz all it takes is just a few drinks to fuck up the baby#but who get it misdiagnosed as autism or adhd because theyre similar#and cuz its such a bitch to get fasd diagnosed cuz no one wants to listen to you if you dont have The Face#i wont ever get it diagnosed probably or not at least whilst im a kid#because my mum doesnt want me to and doesnt listen when i tell her i have it even tho she has enough evidence that my bio mum drank#and i know she'll say theres no point because theres nothing we can do about it and itll just look bad on my resume blah blah blah#but it would be nice to and i would like to have it diagnosed just so its official and i can feel better about it a little#maybe one day ill do a campaign or something and spread awareness of it cuz that would be nice#and thats actually something i want to do maybe and get a purpose#and to help the kids like me who used to feel there was something horribly wrong with them and they couldnt concentrate or do anything#and who felt they were lazy and who were so miserable#because ITS NOT THEIR FAULT!!!#youre not lazy youre trying your best and doing so well#i want it to be more well known so people dont feel as awful about themselves and spend their life hating themselves#but for now ill just try to survive until adulthood#red meows
3 notes · View notes
flippedorbit · 1 year ago
Text
sure mom. get mad at me for napping most of the day
2 notes · View notes
fatelcved · 1 year ago
Text
Tumblr media
i love when songs make me think :' )) bc it occurred to me that aside from maybe her family members, chiyo's probably never?? really spoken about kojirou to anyone, and if she has, it was the bare minimum. like her relationship ended with him in high school, he moved away, and then chiyo never spoke about him again, which wouldn't be totally unusual if it wasn't for the fact that the way that relationship ended continued to impact her as she grew older.
chiyo's issue with kojirou was that while they had great chemistry and understood one another really well, chiyo was still just a kid. kojirou was just a kid. love was this big and scary concept that kojirou wasn't afraid of but wasn't ready for, and chiyo was terrified and not ready. love meant fully opening up to the possibility of getting hurt; love meant forever, in her mind; love was too much to ask of her at a time when she was still growing used to the idea of being wanted in the first place, still recovering from years of feeling unwanted and troublesome.
the fact that chiyo never talks about kojirou means that she can't move on and heal from that experience. just bc she couldn't love him doesn't mean she's incapable of loving someone else, and it doesn't mean that she's going to ruin future relationships. chiyo has a mindset of, " of course i'm the problem. i always make things difficult, " and that stems from being bullied and needing so much attention from her family and from her relationship with kojirou. she doesn't place any fault on the guy who told her he loves her right before moving away :' ) like what was even the point ko :' )
i sure am rambling asdfg but all of this is to say!! make chiyo talk about ko. make her talk about why she hasn't been in a relationship since high school. make her talk about something hard that she avoids and ignores bc that's what she'll always do unless it's pulled out of her :' )
3 notes · View notes
kavehayati · 8 months ago
Text
Wow that was a very good session of haterism this is why I love this account 😻🤞✨
Tumblr media Tumblr media
^^ also me cause I’d go right back to her wahoo
#I still hate her but <333 I feel a bit better#better enough to reply back to her but I’ll leave her be#oh one thing I forgot to mention is that she ALWAYS wants what’s mine#btw I don’t even have that much !!!! “I wish I could be stressed at all”#bitch I can’t stop shaking and nothing is sticking in my brain#“at least you could wake up early” BITCH. waking up early is hardly a flex when I wake up at fucking five am and study from day to night#STRAIGHT with NO BREAKS !!!!!#it’s hardly a good thing when I cannot comprehend a word#because I’m so stressed that I legitimately developed insomnia#you piece of shit I hope you get every bad thing that you’ve caused for me all the hassad the jealousy you disgusting human being and I wis#it multiplies a thousand fold for you#so that you don’t need to look down on me any longer like you look down on me AND dahlia#you’re so cruel#I wonder how any of your friends like you#and it’s pathetic that the only way anybody knows me is that I’m fatemas friend#I HATE YOU !!!! I don’t want to be tied to you for the rest of my life#why the fuck do you think I went insane after I found out the only reason Eris liked me was because I reminded her of someone else#THIS is why I feel like I’m a fucking nobody because I’m never ever myself I’m always someone else#how is that fair exactly huh#?!?!)!:$8392/@102@:&:9292/&/&29#dora daily#such a jealous piece of trash she should’ve begged more to be my friend and I should’ve laughed at her face#these are not the only things she’s done#she was neutral and blamed me at times when a girl was bullying me and getting everyone to gang up on me#now she says it’s not my fault#after what hmmm ? after I went clinically insane ? after the panicking after loosing my family support after everyone hating me#when I say life is unfair I don’t mean generically#I mean quite literally life is more unfair to myself than most people#because I know it’s unfair but according to my analysis of others��� lives most cannot dream to compare to the shit this bitch put me through#for most of my developmental years
0 notes
batboybisexualism · 11 months ago
Text
my stupid fucking doctor not only waited too long to submit my top surgery authorization but she put it down as an inpatient procedure when it's an outpatient procedure so now they have to postpone the surgery until april 23rd when it was supposed to be this fucking tuesday I'm going to fucking kill someone
#on top of all this I was like an hour late to all my dog walks this morning because my family people were delayed getting home#so I got back to nj from brooklyn way late and I have like 20 dog walks today also a surprise dentist appointment for no fucking reason#and my dentist is also a fucking idiot so that was annoying as hell#apparently the fucking surgeon's office isn't allowed to send me those authorization papers to give my doctor before 30 days before surgery#so they had several months to get me the information and have me talk to my pcp but they weren't allowed to??#and then my idiot doctor took forever to send it in despite me calling her every fucking day reminding her#and on top of that she didn't even fill it out correctly when the necessary info was right in front of her#I had to work so hard to free up two weeks to heal from this surgery and three days before the date they tell me this happens all the time#the woman on the phone was like scolding me about my doctor messing it up as if it's my fucking fault#and as if I had any way of knowing that this would all get fucked up and I'd have to force her to do it like idk four days before she did???#then she told me to calm down when I got mad at her for being a jerk about it#god I want to fucking diiiieeeeeee#all this is happening while I'm running on like three hours of sleep too by the way :)#just did my pre-surgery telehealth appointment too and the surgeon was all smiley and like 'oh yeah I'm sure it will work out!'#this was like two days ago too lmao like thanks for the heads up you piece of shit!!!!
0 notes