#am seriously gonna explode
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dreamyberry · 1 year ago
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/ 20.7.23
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dj-wayback · 1 year ago
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NS aint that smart, he doesnt even know what sugon is
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bumps in the road
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phantomrose96 · 2 years ago
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My manager and my project lead both gave me glowing glowing reviews on this project (my lead even CC'd my skip-level and skip-skip-level with his praise and they both responded) even after I spent all of January and February worried that I was slipping behind with work because I was busy being an overwhelmed shell of a person
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notlivys · 3 months ago
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i have this recurrent dream 1d someday broadcast a documental telling everything about modest and what happened between them bts kind of like daisy jones did
HAHWFSKD i love you treating daisy jones like a real band. u are me.
but yeah i totally get where ur coming from when i was a kid i wanted to become a lawyer to save (in my words) them from syco. in my head it was that easy. wish i could be that person again tho
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darkpitlesbian · 5 months ago
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HI JUST. SSENDING THIS IN QUICKLY
hi! so i’ve been staring at your art for like over a year now and just been being amazed by it and now i finally have a tumblr account so i wanted to send this in to say thank you!! your art was by far one of the hugest inspirations for me to keep working on my art and keep trying to get better and it also intensely fueled my bedman hyperfixation (which i still have) ^^ i would spend HOURS back in like april and may last year studying your art style and trying to figure out how to do poses and things like you did and i think it was one of the biggest steps that i took towards where my art has ended up today!
thank you for making all your gorgeous art!! it really encouraged me to keep trying with my art and studying and admiring your works helped me learn a lot! you’re super super cool, keep up the great work 🫶
HEY..!!! oh my god 😭💖💖 thank you so much!! this is one of the nicest things anyones said about my art Seriously i feel so touched right now 😭 im so happy…!!!
idek what to say i never thought someone would study my poses and such i always feel like my art is kind of stiff even when i put effort into it… i draw for fun so its not a big deal but sometimes im not happy with it… remember to always use references whenever you want (i never do this)
your art has developed so nicely into your own style also!! the poses are great and i love the facial expressions and coloring 🥺🥺 i can tell you work hard on it!! TYSM again for the message it really made my day!! lets both do our best to keep improving 💖💖
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bunnyboy-juice · 6 months ago
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me (not joking, very stressed): i think im going to have a mental breakdown if something else goes wrong here.
everyone irl: hahahhahaa ur so funny(:
#i am literally 2 secobds from vomiting over how stressed i am about some worm stuff#*work stuff#but im glad my discomfort is entertaining for them 🙃🙃🙃#(im seriously fine i just have crippling anxiety to the point i speedran the medcard process in my state from how mt assessment went)#(and this would stress Anyone out so yk. i feel like im dying hahahaha)#im also aware mt reaction 8s an over reaction#it just like. kinda sucks that even when im being genuine no one believes me ;~;#no one really believes me unless im like. Actively spiraling in front of them#and then instead of offering support 9/10 ppl get mad and scared and upset that im having a reaction Period#bc they are so large and disproportionate 🤩#anyway. i may actually vomit about this cauze.my stomach wont calm down#and like theres truly solutions there#theres truly things that can be done#im just..so crisised out#between work and personal i have literally not had a SINGLE MONTH this year w/o some major crisis happening around me that im pulled into#i feel so sick#and i have to isolate myself to fix this but dont have the tiiiiiiiiiime available#so yk. doing Great (':#yes this is why ive been extremely online the last few months and Shari everything#i Cannot keep this in and i Cannot talk to people abt it#bc im at a place now where if im asked probing questions theres a 80% chance im gonna wanna explode#and ethically kt doesnt feel ok to go to people Knowing this will happen#im so deeply bot ok rn i am like. woozy#oh no
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sleep-nurse · 1 year ago
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hey umm... taps my little fingers together n hands u this and scurries off 🏃‍♂️💨💨💨💨💨
HHEGKEHG£TY()T£()=UT£()U()()££()TT()U()T£T WHAT!!!!!!! WHAT!!!!!!!OMGNMJKTJGKJKHGGHJKHJGKHGJK 💥💥💥
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cosmoknightchaos · 11 months ago
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Me when the robot/AI with a female voice who serves as the antagonist for most of the game while also becoming your friend and becoming a fan-favorite in the fandom sings a song during the end credits
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roosterbruiser · 2 years ago
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"and then it's you and Jake looking at your son as he goes through all five stages of grief in mere minutes." - poor August 😂 hope he finds the acceptance stage real quick and finds that he can let go of the trauma 😂😌
""family meeting. now," your son says with all the authority of a parental figure, pointing to the living room." - haha, how the turntables... Jokes aside, I love poor boy so much, trying to get his life back after his parents shattered it 😂
""oh, I know what you were just doing," he says. "don't worry, I won't forget it. neither will the therapist you're gonna pay for."" - this cracks me up so much 😂 now, I am no therapist myself, but I imagine August just laying there on the couch, telling the therapist how outrageous what his parents are doing is, and the therapist just saying "you know that is how you were created too, right?", and August just gets a whole lot of more trauma 😂 poor kid 😂
"your husband is only teasing--you know this. but August sure doesn't. you're fairly certain August is about to crumble to the floor." - the kid has much to learn still 😂
""is nothing sacred?!"", ""just your mama's smokin' hot bod--!"", ""NO!" August firmly presses his palms over his ears and shakes his head. "I CAN'T COME BACK FROM THAT!"" - hahaha, poor, poor kid, but this does make me laugh so much 😂 I can just imagine him avoiding his parents for a day or two as much as he can
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octaviaabadassblakee · 2 years ago
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It's 11:50pm on Friday and absolutely no one asked but ima tell you insanely personal details about me anyway. I am insanely submissive it aches sometimes. Like physically I can feel the need to just totally submit for a while, get outta my head. And I've never had that, ya know? Never had someone to trust to take control like that. Someone who knew how to get me so deep in my head that I'm somehow out of it completely. And y'all I fucking want that. I want a proper soft dom. A proper scene. I wanna get into a headspace that's so clear and fuzzy and free and safe. I need it. I need it.
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froggy-paws · 7 months ago
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this post pisses me off so badly bc OP where the FUCK did you get those colors from???
comparing the actual colors picked from the example images (which yes are lovely on a color composition scale) they look so dark and desaturated which gives such a dead washed out vibe... there's no Balance!! where's the shade contrast!? they all blend together and end up looking more like muddy browns than anything else!
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the pallets on the right are all directly color picked from the images and are so much brighter and interesting to look at!! what the fuck even happened to the poor yellow for the boy colors?? WHY IS IT OLIVE?!?! and where did the ultramarine blue come from?? the girl colors are slightly better just because red and green are complimentary so they're going to look good together no matter how weirdly desaturated...
i cannot handle the color theory slander because those pallets ARE FUCKING UGLY!! AND DO NOT ALIGN WITH COLOR THEORY!! anyways heres my personal version of boy and girl colors that were also color picked from the example images just to prove that there are good pallets that do use these colors just not those exact shades or tones
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PSA
avoid conforming to traditional gender norms by avoiding this common palette:
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try using these palettes instead!!
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bulletbilltime · 2 months ago
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"Did you hear the stupid bigoted thing this known outrage farmer said? What a stupid thing he said! Let's post it everywhere and make the news 24/7 about that thing and make him the center of attention so more people can see the shitty things he said! There is no downside from giving the stupid bigot more of a platform!"
"What do you mean he is the president now. What do you mean he's the president a 2nd time. Nobody could have predicted this."
#bulletbilltime rambling#ok I promise I won't keep making political posts but this is a sore point for me#we as a people seriously need to start being more critical of the ways in which the world around us is pushing us to be outraged#and especially how we're motivated to share the thing that outraged us#bigots are popular on social media because they get people to share them from being mad at them#I'm just as guilty of this don't get me wrong#but also like... so many of these alt-right grifters are banking on people talking about them#the more ppl talk about them the more reach they have#if you spread their bigotry even in the spirit of dunking on it#you are giving their bigotry a platform and it will reach ppl it couldn't reach before#you are literally helping them break into a new audience#'oh but my audience knows I'm a leftist!' it doesn't matter#every time you share someone's reactionary takes it's one more node on the tree of reach that it has#and it's more likely it will reach the people who are more susceptible to their messaging#dunking posts in water on tumblr is like... a start at least in signaling that the take is bullshit#but idk I feel like we can do better#we do need to discuss and disarm the stupid takes but your clapback meme won't do it.#in fact memes and clapbacks as a whole are a godawful way of educating people#we need proper dialogues not fucking debates#unfortunately on a national level this is probably not gonna change bc the news love their controversial topics. it gets views.#so we need to at least start refusing to platform them in our own spaces at the very least#just. stop sharing the bigot. you'll live.#AND FOR FUCK'S SAKE DON'T TURN THEIR RACISM INTO A FUCKING MEME#yes this is about the haitian quote. yes if you are non-haitian and made jokes about haitians eating cats or dogs you did racism.#it isn't okay just bc you did it ironically#AND YOU ARE PLATFORMING RACISM ANYWAY SO WHAT THE FUCK#I am going to grab all of you fuckers and shake you around like snowglobes until you get this through your thick skulls#the post is stored in the tags#I hope social media explodes
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taintedcigs · 5 months ago
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can’t stop thinking about firefighter steve x chief’s daughter and it’s your fault </3333
— switched
firefighter!steve harrington x reader.
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CAN'T STOP WON'T STOP... I AM SORRY!!!... also ignore my lazy caption i cant find anything better woops... warnings: MINORS DNI!!! just filthy piv smut, maybe a bit of mean!steve, some dirty talk and DUH switch!steve and switch!reader bc i can't help myself. </3 wc: 1.1k+
But seriously imagine Steve with Captain's daughter... you meet him when your dad takes you down to the station, and of course, Steve charming Harrington lays (or at least tries to) the moves on you the SECOND he meets you, and sure enough, captain WARNS him to stay away from you.
Not realizing forbidden fruit is much more juicy when it's prohibited. and it quickly turns into a dirty little secret.
So casual and fun, the sneaking around, the hidden dates, having sex wherever and whenever you can, and of course, having sex while the others are busy and he's not, and now you convince him to have sex in one of the trucks.
Lodged in one of the backseats, you're on top of him, his uniform folded to his ankles, he looks good with it, but much better out of it.
With slow movements, you tease him, milking him for his worth, hips rolling so skillfully that all he can do is mutter out a few "F-fuck!"'s and a whole lot of "S-shit.... mhmm... jus' like that, honey."
You're perfect, but your teasing is straight-up torturous. "Baby," he whispers, lips grazing over your ear, pathetically and heaving, just needing more of you, even though you're sure he can't go in any deeper.
"We have to be quick." It's almost like a warning, he doesn't want to get caught, and neither do you, but it's so much fun with the risks, with the what-ifs, with the sneaking around and the secrets.
You pull back from his neck with a hearty giggle, the smile adorning your face is sweet and deadly, picking up your pace just slightly, bouncing up and down his veiny cock, feeling him stretch you open, nice and wide.
And as much as you want to pretend that it doesn't have any effect on you, it does. He's big, so big that you can almost feel him splitting you open, feeling him throbbing, can imagine his pink tip going red, tired of all the teasing, but you're nowhere near done. "Oh, do we?"
You throw him another sultry look and at this point, you can barely see his pupils, gaze overblown by desire, the tight hold he has on your hips is almost bruising, marking you, heavy breathing all over your already marked up neck. you know he's going to explode soon. "I don't think you get to decide that, Steve."
Another smirk thrown his way, "What happened, Stevie? gonna cum?" you ask, voice filled with desire, hips grinding against his thighs, every movement is met with his loud moans.
Not even bothering to stifle it.
It's like he wants everyone to know that you're his.
"You're evil," he groans, it's much less pathetic, almost sinful coming out from his salmon-pink lips, the tip of his cock hitting spots inside of you that you didn't know existed.
And you try, so hard, to play it cool, like grinding down on his huge cock is not making you want to scream out.
Like his thick thighs that you are sitting on and heavy balls that are slapping against your sweetest spots aren't making you squirm, like you're not about to whine and beg for him to make you cum.
And, shit, you know he can tell, by the way his big hands grab your hips, guiding you roughly, a bruising hold that makes you let out a mewl, yet, you still hope he doesn't notice.
But he does.
"You love it, don't you? Love me having all the control and being all mean to you?" Your last attempt to have all the control and you fail.
Because his padded thumb rubs circles against your clit, and your voice cracks, turning you into a mewling mess.
He can feel you slipping over the control, it's all so quick, one more move from him and he knows you'll be putty in his hands, begging to have his cock stuffed inside you forever.
Just the thought of that makes him want to spend his load inside of you, a half-smirk is quick to form its place on his freckled cheeks. "That's funny," he grunts, realizing that your movements are slowing down, allowing him to finally drive his cock into you slowly, regaining some sort of control, intently watching the way your eyes roll all the way to the back of your head.
"W-what is?" You try to hum confidently, attempting to mask your submissiveness, but it's too fucking late, and that infamous smirk grows on his cheeks, spreading all over.
He chuckles, the sound bellowing from his stomach, it's downright pornographic, making your pussy flutter in more ways than one.
His movements pick up, fucking into you with short but rough thrusts, filling you all the way in.
"That you think you even have an ounce of control, sweetheart," he growls into your ear, making you moan with need, the room filled with slapping noises, heavy balls hitting against your clit.
All so stimulating.
"I let you have it, and I can take it away just as quick, hmm?" He barely gives you any time to adjust to his words, abusing his cock inside of your soppy pussy, making you gasp as your gaze glistens with tears.
He's just so fucking good.
And you're perfect like this.
"S-steve!" You yelp, driving him more and more to the brink of insanity, hands grabbing any globe of skin he can find, teeth sinking into it, while his cock hits inside of that sweet spongey spot that makes you sing.
You have that fucked out look on your face, plushy lips slightly apart, hair disheveled and brows knitted, Steve wants nothing more than to fuck your drooly lips next, and fill each of your filthy holes with his cum.
"God, I love it much more when you go all cock drunk on me like this.... Can't even form a coherent thought when I'm poundin' into you, can you, honey?" The name sounds sickly sweet rolling off his lips, but in the dirtiest way, and all you can do is nod meekly, grabbing onto his shoulders for some sort of support.
He hums contently, watching the way his cock disappears in and out of you, covered in your juices, perfect fucking sight.
"Singing like an angel the second i have you bouncin' on my cock, that's right, sweetheart, love it so much more when all that's coming out of those pretty little lips are those whines," he whispers in the shell of your ear, mouth running more and more the closer he gets, and his gaze darkens.
"Now be a good girl and take my cock, yea?"
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herrscherofmagic · 10 months ago
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First of all: this is absolutely amazing and I can't thank you enough for this analysis of Acheron!!
Second: I just wanted to add a mention of Honkai World Diva, which is Mei's signature song from the GGZ days when Mihoyo was literally a smol indie company; a cover of it was used in Lament of the Fallen in HI3rd!
"Crimson moon shines upon a town that is smeared in blood…" Cried the diva given into lament All those sweet little dreams buried deep in memories until the very end -Honkai World Diva lyrics
I'm really far behind on the story and haven't even started Penacony nor seen most of the promo material, so all the little glimpses I've caught of Acheron & Black Swan content have confused me, and in general I've been losing interest in HSR's main story and have been trying to get back
but with all the context you've given in this analysis, plus the lyrics of Honkai World Diva, it feels like Acheron is a totally different character for me now
like, Mei never truly "lost" Kiana in most versions of their story. Yes in GGZ when God Kiana ended the world at the end of the Retrospective arc, but otherwise they managed to hold on and fight together for most of the time. and in HI3rd ditto, Mei never truly "lost" Kiana. She was close, yes, but Kiana endured and they reunited eventually.
So Honkai World Diva always fit Mei but in a sorta loose way, it always felt almost like a parody of Mei's actual story, y'know?
BUT NOW WITH ACHERON??? HELLO?????
Like at first in Genshin with Raiden Ei I thought her story sorta fit HWD as well because of the loss of Makoto, and the whole "red moon" thing from the Khaenri'ah cataclysm. But with Acheron it's so painfully clear in that teaser image and with all the other context you've given.
If Acheron lost her "Kiana" then all the lyrics would fit her story nearly perfectly!
O your smile is tainted and your face is cold There's no more comfort in your lips and cheeks The whirling noise is pulling me within The tainted carcass of this world
[Pre-Chorus] All the incandescent stars of heaven will die at the end of days Your gentle soul given to damnation
The death of the person closest to Acheron and the disaster in which it happened. (also... "your gentle soul given to damnation" is such a powerful line and I pray to Da Wei that we get something like that in HSR's story!!)
[Chorus] "Crimson moon shines upon a town that is smeared in blood..." Cried the diva given into lament All those sweet little dreams buried deep in memories until the very end
[Verse 2] Lost and faded truth of bygone memories Hiddеn deep in my corrupt body
Imagery of the disaster and Acheron's despair, along with the memories being "buried away" with Acheron seemingly unable to remember neither the good nor bad of her past life; also the "corrupt body" of her white-and-red form
[Pre-Chorus] I can hear the voices of the people I miss in this final song I would tremble just to hold them once more
[Chorus] "Florid moon shines upon a world that is doomed to die..." Wailed the diva given into lament All our pale, fleeting dreams are where the truths are hidden Until they fade away
"Crimson moon shines upon the town that is smeared in blood..." Cried the diva given into lament All those sweet little dreams buried deep in memories until the very end
The mention of the truth being "hidden" in fleeting dreams, paired with the teaser when Black Swan was diving into Acheron's memories to find the "truth" about whatever happened w/ the Annihilation Gang...
obligatory post before acheron's release
obviously, it's established that acheron is a variant of raiden mei. her real name is not actually acheron (confirmed through the livestream, but...come on, we all already knew that). specifically, there's loads of similarities in her design to the herrscher of thunder above all else
similar hair structure, hair part, n hairpiece (n obviously the color, too),
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sword structure, patterns, n nearly identical handles,
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one "red" arm,
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the bust/halter,
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and of course, the color scheme as shown in acheron's "emanator" form, n the horns shown in the livestream
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with all that in mind, i imagine acheron is a variant of mei who failed to save the person closest to her (her kiana, to simplify it), n/or watched them die, or even killed them herself. it's shown during her dance with black swan that there was obviously someone important to her in her past, conflict arose in a setting much like the one featured in the livestream, n there's even imagery of her walking alone with only the moon in the sky to keep her company
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kiana has been associated with the moon n moon imagery since the flyme2themoon days; her origin was quite literally a game about blasting off to the moon
this teaser resembles thunders over nagazora to me, as well as mei watching kiana's end in honkai gakuen
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there's also the fact that the type of emanator acheron is, an emanator of nihility, is classified as a self-annihilator; those who have felt the pull of nihility n been unable to escape drowning in it. self-annihilator's take the meaning of nihility to heart, so much so that it erodes their bodies n memories
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acheron has been confirmed as the self-annihilator type in her character introduction posted recently. what really strikes me about this line is the phrasing of "existence is nothing"
sounds familiar, doesn't it?
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mei is characterized by the tragedies in her life, n how they impact her. growing up isolated, a kidnapping at a young age, bullying at school, suicidal tendencies, n the constant reminder that the girl she loves more than anything in the world will always put the overall well being of humanity over herself
to me, acheron is a mei shaped by loss. the mei we remember from hi3 had the chance to grow n change; to learn from her mistakes, n to fight for a better world, bc she had the support of her friends n her most important person. acheron doesn't seem to have that level of support from anyone, at least not anyone still in her life currently
which brings me to my next point. she HAD a "kiana," but ultimately lost her. n this is the result
acheron is incredibly powerful, but her power seems incredibly volatile. she carries this innate sadness with her wherever she goes, n the very path she walks n the very aeon she became an avatar of strips life of all meaning, all the beauty from the world
it's a far cry from the mei we know, bc clearly, there was a very pivotal change in her development that i can only attribute to the loss of her world's "kiana"
#im gonna be SICK i stg#i am going to explode into a bajillion tiny pieces#i demand financial compensation for the critical emotional damage this post dealt to me#so i've been somewhat ambivalent about acheron so far#even w/ the design parallels to mei#but i didn't realize the other thematic parallels like the moon imagery or nagazora-like scene#this is DEVASTATING and i think i'll never recover#the thing is I love the idea of “what if [alternate path/ending]?” for characters!!!!#like a “what if kiana fell to honkai and fought side-by-side with HoV” or “what if bronya rand & seele no-last-name swapped roles in life?"#that kind of thing right???#so realizing that Acheron is basically a “okay but what if Mei DIDN'T get the help she needed” is like#idk it feels like one of my favorite headcanons made actual canon >~<#obvi it's not officially confirmed yet but still... holy shit#i'm saving for kafka but this is actually swaying me to consider acheron now#and i've been dragging my feet on penacony but this is seriously motivating me to do it#if nothing else at least to figure out acheron's story T_T#ALSO I LOVE NIHILITY SO MUCH#one of the core pillars of a recent fanfic idea i've been brewing up has revolved around Nihility#specifically the idea of Kiana in the HI3rd setting falling into despair and becoming a “self-annihilator” of sorts#basically being struck to the core by the path of Nihility#so this is such an interesting parallel to that#a million-plus-one thanks for this post because i certainly wouldn't have put 2 and 2 together to figure this out myself#thank you thank you thank you thaaaaaaaaaaank you!!!
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killerpancakeburger · 7 months ago
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KNIGHT IN SHINING KHAKI
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Gif by @bastardcompany
SUMMARY: You've angered the wrong officer. You think you're a goner when Johnny sweeps in to save the day.
PAIRING: Soap x f!Reader ("her" is used to refer to reader once, that's it) (+ Reader's hair is long enough to grab)
TAGS: Civilian!Reader, Depressed!Reader, Insecure!Reader, Angry!Soap, Protective!Soap, GuardDog!Soap, canon violence, hurt/comfort, swearing, blood mention. Ghost makes an appearance as a matchmaker lol. The love is requited they're just insecure idiots. Making Shit Up for the Plot/military inaccuracies.
WORD COUNT: 2.7k
A/N: My original prompt for this was: civilian!reader sees Soap in action and gets Horny. No Scared Just Horny.
Then I found out that Soap canonically beat up an officer. I am also obsessed with this video.
Part 1. Part 3.
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This is it, you thought to yourself. 
This is how I die.
The day had unfolded like any other. Your shift was over and you were locking up your office, as usual. Your attention was focused on your hands’ motion, your guard dropped, your back exposed.
This explained why, when the stranger grabbed your hair and bashed your head against the door mercilessly, you didn’t see it coming in the slightest. The fact that you had zero combat experience while the person manhandling you was a decorated military officer obviously made matters worse, but at the moment of the assault, you didn’t know that.
The thud of the collision was eclipsed almost immediately by the pain exploding in your face. Half-stunned, all you could comprehend at the moment, every single signal sent by your brain was compacted in one word: suffering. Sharp, all-encompassing. You yelped, your hands vainly pushing against the cold, hard surface to get away.
“I've finally found you, you little snitch. Didn’t think you'd get away with it, now did you?”
Despite the blood thumping in your ears, and how groggy the hit on your head made you, his words reached you perfectly. They were seeping with fury and disdain. His voice didn’t ring a bell, so you tried to turn your head to glimpse him, if only at the corner of your eye, and he granted you some leeway to do so.
Perplexity filled you as you finally caught sight of your aggressor: you've never seen that man before.
“I don't even know who you are,” you winced.
Talking back in your situation would be judged stupid and reckless by a majority of people. Laying low assured more chances to avoid harm.
However most people hadn't been mugged at knifepoint like you had been, and most people valued their lives way more than you did.
Once the confusion and incredulity subsided, the pain still vivid but manageable, you were left with frustration and anger towards your interminable bad luck and the man behind you. His aversion was harder to take seriously when it seemed to have no foundation.
The grip on your hair tightened, making you grit your teeth.
“I'll refresh your memory, then.”
One part of you managed to be pleased to know that this mystery would be solved; the rest was ringing alarm bells when hearing the underlying threats in his tone.
“Weeks ago, you filed a report for embezzlement.”
You frowned, having no recollection of his claims, before a memory emerged. You saw them in flashes: the sudden, abnormally high spendings, the certificates full of anomalies, the incoherent dates; all this lead you to complete a reporting form, just as your job required you to. It was just a formality. You hadn't even even paid attention to the name attached to the expenses, therefore the officer was still anonymous.
Your aggressor scoffs menacingly, easily reading on your face that you remembered.
“They're gonna strip me of my rank and throw me in jail because of you. I'll make you pay even if it’s the last thing I do.”
That last sentence was finished in an almost shout, making you flinch, wishing you could pass through the door.
You quietly resigned yourself to your fate. No one was coming for you. You were no stranger to the inner workings of the military - no one would dare cross an officer that high-ranked for your sake. 
I've lived a good li- well, no. A pretty shitty life, actually. But at least I can say I did the right thing.
Just as you closed your eyes and braced yourself, hoping this wouldn’t drag on, a Scottish-accentuated roar resonated in the empty hall.
“Get yer hands off her-”
You had never heard Soap sound so enraged, nor his pitch so gravelly. Relief flooded through you at the sound of his voice, blended with gratitude. Tears stinged the corners of your eyes.
All of a sudden the unyielding grip on your hair was gone, the sound of something violently hitting the wall punctuating your newfound freedom. 
“-ye fucking bastard!”
You immediately turned around to see what was happening, leaning against the door behind you. Your legs were too shaky to be reliable. The harmed side of your face was throbbing in pain as you took in the scene with wide eyes.
Johnny had pinned the officer against the wall with one forearm across his chest. He dealt him a punch to the face powerful enough that the resulting thud made you grimace, despite not feeling any sympathy for his target.
He managed to administer a second blow before his adversary snapped out of his stupor, and the advantage he gained from taking him by surprise ran its course.
As your assailant defended himself with the strength of someone backed into a corner, you couldn't help but fear for Soap's safety for a moment. Despite knowing that one's rank didn’t reflect their fighting prowess, a rush of anxiety passed through you at the idea that he could lose that confrontation.
Nonetheless, he quickly put your mind at ease as his skills proved to be largely superior. The gap between the two was deep enough that it was obvious even to a neophyte like you.
Paralyzed, you couldn’t do anything but stare at the display of violence with a mix of morbid fascination and sadistic satisfaction. Honestly, if you could borrow Soap's body, you would without a doubt inflict the same treatment on that man. Maybe worse. Fair payback for the threats, the smashing of your face, the probable trauma you'd get from this. Maybe not that fair. But maybe for once you'd stop trying to act like a paragon of virtue.
You should have been scared, you realized. You had never been involved in a fight before. You had never witnessed firsthand the brutality Johnny was capable of, despite being aware of it, between his status as a soldier and the reports you read. The dog tags jingling from his neck and the khaki of his uniform were like so many visual reminders that he was a killing machine. His ferocious wrath, his yelling and his punches should have made you cower in fright.
However the only feeling inhabiting you was safety, as paradoxical as it sounded. Soap was safe, you were convinced of it, consciously or not.
This whole ordeal felt like it lasted an eternity and a minute at the same time. You blinked and out of nowhere, Johnny was straddling the officer on the floor. Blows kept pouring in but they were one-sided - the sergeant had gained the upper hand. The rhythm of his strikes seemed attuned to the beatings of your heart. Each resonated inside of your ears with your skull as their echo chamber. The noise was loud enough to cover your own thoughts.
As you focused on your breathing, you managed to slow down your heartbeats, and the blood-fueled pump between your ribs no longer felt like it could burst out of your chest at any moment. You failed however to contain the tremor in your hands.
You chose to focus on Soap's hands instead. They were soaked red from blood spilled, but not his. Specks of crimson sprinkled his hair, his face, his neck, his t-shirt.
There was a certain sort of lethal beauty to this brutal display that you couldn't help but contemplate in reverent silence: the way his bicep swole when he threw his arm back before hitting his target. The tightening of the muscles beneath the tanned skin of his arms. His icy stare. The harsh line of his jaw. His stern, inflexible expression, one he usually wore in meetings or after Price gave the order to leave.
The expression of someone who would stop at nothing, provided a bleak little voice in the back of your mind. The idea didn’t bother you nearly as much as it should have.
“Not gonna make him stop?”
The familiar grunt of Ghost's voice almost made you jump out of your skin. You pivoted and the behemoth of a lieutenant was there, in casual clothes, right by your side. You had no idea when he arrived or how long he's been standing there, quiet like a shadow.
Something dark flashed in his brown eyes as his gaze lingered on the hurt side of your face.
“Why would I show mercy to someone who would have granted me none?” you scoffed bitterly.
“Someone's bloodthirsty.”
“You're one to talk.”
“Didn’t say it was a bad thing.”
You turned your attention back to Soap and Ghost did the same.
“I doubt he would listen to me.”
“He would,” stated the masked man, with the assertiveness of someone announcing a conviction. 
“But if ya don't believe me…”
A beat, then.
“Oï, Johnny!”
The shout was nonchalant, like it was something he did often, calling off his sergeant from some prey like the Scotsman was his personal attack dog.
The effect was immediate.
Soap abruptly froze, blinking a couple times as if awakening from a trance. Then he perked up, and turned around, eyes searching. The first sound that left his lips was a call of your name. His gaze latched onto you and didn’t let go as he stood up and rushed towards you. The naked vulnerability, the raw openness in his voice and on his face were so earnest that they felt like a Cupid's arrow shot straight between your lungs. It left you devoid of speech and motion, so as Johnny reached for you, all you could do was try to convey your reassurances through your eyes; that you were mostly fine, and so grateful, but worried for him, that he made everything better-
His arms closing around you made the outside disappear, and suddenly the whole world came down to Johnny, and only him. His embrace was enjoyable for a second before the pressure of his body against your face woke up your contusions. You let out a muffled cry of pain and he released you immediately, swearing and apologizing. However his hands didn’t leave you, grasping your shoulders.
“C'mere hen, lemme have a look at ye.”
“Oh, I'm fine, you should worry about-”
Your voice pathetically died in your throat as he cupped your face, leaning over, way too close for your heart to not start stammering uncontrollably.
The combined attention of his fingertips on your skin and the turquoise of his eyes roaming your visage turned your cheeks into a blazing inferno.
Unable to maintain eye contact, your gaze wandered over his own injuries, a split lip and a couple of bruises.
Suddenly he grabbed your chin between his thumb and index, tilting your face one way and the other. Your skin flared up at the contact, pleasant yet nervous tingles scattering all over your body.
“Ye sure he didn’t hit ye on that side? Yer a wee bit red.”
You bit back a whine of complaint at that comment. He couldn’t be that oblivious.
“Yer makin’ it worse, Johnny.” sneaked Ghost, the amusement manifest in his voice - at least to you.
Soap looked up to him, frowning in incomprehension, indignant. 
“The hell ya on aboot L.T.? How am ah makin’ it worse?”
You panicked.
“Shut up Riley!” you hissed, in a desperate attempt to put a stop to his shenanigans, forgetting that you were supposed to be severely intimidated by the masked man.
That drew a gruff chuckle out of him. Your sudden outburst caused Johnny to release you.
“Not that I'm not glad to see you, but why are you two even here, anyway?”
You were kind of proud of your ability to change the subject.
“Was comin’ tae get ye fer a game,” smiled Soap, and it reminded you of a pet proudly presenting its owners with its findings.
“This one wasn’t coming back, and neither of you were answering your phones, so we figured somethin’ went wrong. And we were right. This poor fucker is wanted. Called in reinforcements to deal with him.”
Footsteps’ noises caught your attention. A group of soldiers in uniform seized your aggressor and brought him to his feet, before unceremoniously shoving him in the direction opposite of you.
“Gotta tell Gaz the game ain't happening tonight.”
By the time you took in what Ghost had said, and turned away from the procession, he had already disappeared.
“This isn’t over,” menaced the officer, passing by your spot as he was hauled away. “When I get out-”
“Shut the fuck up,” snarled Soap instantly, protectively positionning himself in front of you.
“Found yourself a faithful guard dog, uh?” the other man taunted.
One one hand, that last remark wasn’t so far from the truth - he had been acting a lot like that: barking threats, baring his teeths, standing between you and the menace, reducing a man to a bloody pulp for hitting you…
But on the other hand, letting that piece of shit talk to Johnny this way was simply out of the question.
Before thinking, you found yourself walking in front of the sergeant and retorting.
“What, jealous he's ten times the man you'll never be?”
Fortunately for you, he was dragged away before he could snap anything back. That didn’t prevent you from regretting your snarky comment immediately. It had been a purely impulsive urge, the kind that could make you feel heavy remorse for days, if not years. As if this seasoned combat expert needed your aid to defend himself. The idea was ludicrous.
You didn’t get a moment to mope around however, as Johnny proceeded to grab you by the hips and press you flush against him with a jubilant smirk. You couldn’t do much except prop yourself with both hands on his pectorals to avoid stumbling.
“My hero.” he praised like a smitten damsel in distress.
“Look who's talking.”
You lowered your gaze despite yourself, mumbling your reply, a half smile on your lips, embarrassed but amused.
“Going after bastards is mah job, not yours. You gutsy little thing.”
You refrained a sarcastic laughter at the nickname - gutsy and little were two things you have never been called, as far as you can remember. But you weren't about to argue with the man who just saved your sorry ass.
His fingers pressed into your flesh, sending tickles at the bottom of your spine.You were about to ask him to let you go, the position too incriminating for this public setting, when you noticed how dilated his pupils were. He had to be high on adrenaline from the fight.
You may have let yourself get lost in the blue pools of his eyes, until his expression turned grave.
“Ye sure yer good? Yer too calm about this. No need tae put oan a brave face fer me, aye?”
The genuine, serious concern in his eyes made the inside of your stomach twist.
“I'm good. You arrived just in time,” you assured.
How peculiar it felt to be the one to comfort Johnny, rather than the opposite; that the lionhearted, superhuman sergeant Mactavish might even need such a thing; that he might require it from you, of all people.
“He didn’t get to do much.”
His pretty features contorted into a scowl at the reminder of your attacker.
“That sonuvabitch… raising a hand on ye in broad fuckin’ daylight… if he ever touches ye again, I swear I’ll…”
As he kept fulminating against your assailant, you couldn’t stop an endeared smile from spreading on your lips. Listening to one of Soap's rants brightened your mood; it was familiar. The sincerity in his words and his tone was welcome. He wasn’t able to fake those emotions even if he wanted to; they spilled out of him like a waterfall. His honest worry and righteous ire towards someone who hurt you was… flattering, in a sense. It made you feel cared for, like you mattered.
Then red started dripping.
“Johnny… your nose is bleeding.”
He wiped it negligently with the back of his hand, only succeeding in smearing it over his face. You couldn’t hold back a snort.
“Bend over. It will stop faster.”
“Buy me dinner first.”
He punctuated his quip with a suggestive wriggle of his eyebrows. You rolled your eyes.
“Let's just go to medical already.” you grumbled, starting to walk decisively, albeit stiffly, in the right direction.
“Aye, aye,” acquiesced your savior, jogging a bit to catch up to you.
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whisper-and-tangle · 2 years ago
Text
oughhh. so many fic ideas. so little time.
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