#am i still sobbing rn? yeah.
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Brb about to cry myself to sleep about Haldir dying in the films and the emotional damage that had to have caused Celeborn in particular.
I can only imagine Celeborn and Haldir being friends and becoming close for centuries upon centuries, and perhaps even Celeborn himself (not Galadriel, but him alone) specifically choosing Haldir to be Marchwarden.
Because he would trust no other more with such a title and task.
And then off Haldir goes with a final goodbye, off to Helm's Deep to fight alongside the race of Men.
And Celeborn waits. And waits. And until all the bodies of elves from the battle get brought back home to Lothlórien, he worries.
And he sees Haldir's bow. Then his quiver, then his sword, and then- his body.
And all he does for weeks is cry. He ponders leaving his own kingdom for Valinor- but what use is it, when his people need him?
Even so, until time comes where he finally leaves Middle Earth- he is miserable and dimmed and lonely, even with Lady Galadriel by his side.
He is only made happy again when he crosses to Valinor, and there are countless familiar faces waiting, banners risen high in honour of his arrival.
And out from behind one steps Haldir, face softened and chin held high, before he dips it to his Lord, like he always had.
Celeborn has never found himself moving faster, and he hugs his beloved Marchwarden so closely Haldir can feel just how much he trembles.
#celeborn#lord celeborn#haldir#lotr#lord of the rings#technically hcs i guess but#i can just see celeborn hurting when losing haldir#and it isn't that life isn't worth it without him#but it's not exactly as warm as it was before#galadriel can see that she misses him. she encourages him finally to leave. her word is all it takes for him to be gone within days#she is happy for him- and she will see him soon enough#and greet their marchwarden when she makes her way there too I'm sure#helm's deep#am i projecting my own deep love of haldir onto celeborn bc i cry every time i watch the films? maybe.#did i watch the films at all recently? not not yet been busy#am i still sobbing rn? yeah.
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whaddafuq who let the links connect to actual google chrome who is the idiot that updated tumblr for that <- procrastinator.
#💜.talks#I AM NOT DEAD. I MADE THIS SO YALL KNOW I AM NOT DEAD#I STILL HAVE PLANS ABT DOING STUFF BUT IM JUST. REALLY GOING THROUGH IT RN#no not mentally its about my show omfg im gonna make a whole post abt that drama#mentally besides that shitshow we're doing great !!!#yeah i promise im not abandoning yall i just need some time bc. yeah.#my homies know. they know. its hell right now.#BUT BY APRIL 21 OR 22 IM GONNA BE FREEEEEEE i should start working on the smau#if i am good enough i can crank out chapters like i used to#BUT YEAH THIS IS YOUR FRIENDLY REMINDER THAT I AM NOT DEAD#i am just chilling (almost started sobbing today bc of this stupid production)#best part is i CAN tell yall
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well. i finished ch 17 of hi3. but at what cost
#avil plays hi3#tbf majority of me playing through hi3 just looks like This.#yes the acheron trailer made me get up and finish ch 17#i. :(#the fight between kiana and mei was so painful :(#ok also i suck ass in the combat and i was so scared of having to restart#BUT I THINK I HURT MORE THE FACT THAT KIANA JUST REFUSED TO GIVE UP ON MEI#BUT MEIS ALSO DOING THIS BECAUSE SHES TRYING TO SAVE KIANA#AND THEY WERE BOTH FIGHTING TO STOP AND TRY TO SAVE EACH OTHER#MEI YOU SAVED KIANA BUT LIKE..... DONT YOU WANT TO LIVE ALONGSIDE HER.... MEI PLEASE#tbh. the way i was going through ch 17 for hi3.#kiana and mei remind me a lot of oz and gil's relationship back in pandora hearts but#now it makes me want to hit my head on a brick wall because#'wow. i really just gravitate tO THE SAME FUCKING MEDIA EVERY DAMN TIME AVIL STOP IT FFS'#also idk i was thinking about it too#mei tried earlier to use the herrschers powers to try and protect kiana but it wasnt enough. she failed that time#and with no other option to save her she just HAD to and it makes me HURT that this was her only option#IN HER HEAD. I BELIEVE IN YOU MEI I THINK THERE COULDVE BEEN ANOTHER OPTION HERE (IDK WHAT BUT I AM SOBBING)#sprawls on the ground#at least i can have an emotional break for a little bit.... hsr update so i can chill w that#and then when i finish catching up w that. then i go back to being hi3's punching bag#can i get off this train now? why'd i sign myself up for this (welt yang doomed me and then i got fucked over by everything else)#idk also the way that both mei AND kiana resorted to using their herrscher powers to stop the other. two stubborn people....#but its done because they just... they just care so much and want to save the other#okay yeah we did beat each other up about it bUT STILL#MEI I BELIEVE IN YOU YOU CAN TURN THIS AROUND 😭😭😭😭😭#anyways. glad i did. i have the worst stomach ache rn so i was Going through it#but my brain hit a reset so i feel normal now. save for the crying
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I wonder how many tags i can add on to this
#there must be SOME kind of a limit otherwise posts would get suuuuuuper duper long like is it just 30?#idk but i'm going to find out by simply maxxing out the character limit for each tag and finding out the limit of tags for each post lololo#this is gonna be great. i just have to remember to type without ever using the comma. it shouldn't be too hard right? fuck i almost typed#the comma i'm already bad at this smh my head. also if your still here i commend you. you have a better attention span than i do.#i'm already starting to get bored holy shit this is not happening. i gotta power through this. FOR SCIENCEEEEEEEEEE. or somethinggggggggggg#but fr idk what else to say. maybe just saying that i don't know what to say will be good enough? but does that even count?#I don't even know anymore. ffffffffuck. this is gonna be a while huh? also holy shit if you're still here omg u deserve like. a prize or#something because u definitely didn't have to stay and read all of this bull shit. lololol i typed out bs but decided to just spell the who#thing out just to make it go by faster. i'm so lazy. this is only the nineth tag HOW will i make it to 30. i am sobbing the adhd is adhding#very hard rn. are you still here? bruh this is insane. i have somehow managed to keep ur attention this long and it's just me spouting#absolute balderdash. wait do you know what balderdash even means? i don't care if you do already i'm gonna tell you anyway. balderdash is#basically just another word for nonsense. boom. you learned something new today. balderdash equals nonsense equals this damn post.#why did i decide to do this in the first place. it was a dumb idea. i don't know if i can even keep going. this is only the *counts tags*#it's the 14th tag. we've got a long way to go boys. men. soldiers. comrads. friends. besties peeps. marshmallows.#where was i going with this? oh yeah. trying to max out the limit for tags. dang i almost typed a comma there. i haven't done that since#i think the third or fourth tag. dang that feels like such a long time ago. not for you guys probably. it feels longer because i have to li#type it all out and stuff. so it's definitely gonna feel longer for me. are you still here? good lord don't you have better things to#be doing than reading all of this? we're already on tag number 18. it feels like i should be on the thirtyeth by now. or however it's spell#'toast' you might be wondering 'why are you typing out the names of the numbers instead of say '9' or '5'?' well you see. young one.#this is a strategy i'm using to make each tag slightly longer. even if i don't know how to spell it. it'll make it just a little bit longer#anyway. i got off topic. not that there was ever a topic to begin with. unless it's about making this as long as i can.#which i am apparently good at doing. i guess. are you STILL here? do you seriously have nothing to do? i guess i'm flattered you stayed thi#whole time. instead of reading something else you stayed here. with me. listening to me talk. on the twenty-third tag. oh yeah its tag 23#except now it's tag twenty-four. how crazy is that. this little talk is almost over. only 6 tags away if memory serves right. this's strang#i kind of don't want this to end. but i know it should. after all there is a limit. but all things must come to and end at some point i gue#i'm running out of things to say. it's probably a good thing it's almost over. hahahahah............... but i don't want to go. i don't wan#to leave this post. i've worked so hard on it. and for what. just for it to end. are you still here? yes? good. i'd hate to end this alone.#thank you for indulging me and my craziness. the end is only 2 tags away now. you can go ahead and leave. i'll be okay on my own. really...#...you're still here? i- i don't know what to say. i suppose a toast is in order. perhaps. for this journey. this stupid dumb post i though#would be fun. i'll make it short. it's the last tag after all. this was fun. but i will never do it again. so long as a i live. i'll miss y
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got scammed at work guys!! my top surgery savings (the one time ive actually been consistent with it!!) are gone :'p
#it was 400 dollars whoch i guess isnt huge but still. i have 5 dollars to my name rn#had a whole breakdown at work#that hasnt happened since like 2-3 years ago AND EVEN THEN it was in the bathroom in private but nope#i had 3 other managers w me in that room while i just sobbed and kept saying sorry and it was my fault#it was 400 from my money and then it was 900 from the company (my dad paid it back right away and i wasnt fired or suspended (to my#knowledge at least....) but yeah very embarrassing and i almost had a full on anxiety attack lol fun times#(i am trying to cope with humor so i dont give in and slice up my everything)#des is tired
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*(sigh)* how come I came up with an OC for Mr dumbass cringe fail male wife- Nack/Fang the hunter.....
And I can't even pick ONE thing for Clutch who I'm somehow more obsessed with- ( ´-`) misery I tell ya...
#misserryyyy MISSSERRRYYYYYY!!#(record scratch) - I AM IN MISSSIOUR-#(sobbing) im sorry pimp daddy i can't figure out a character for you all I can think about is a Jessica rabbit situation im sorry-#IVE FAILED HIM!#i say about a fictional possom-#....yeah anyways- that.....#i legit cant think if anything aside from....a skunk...rabbit....or mouse rat#I COULD DO A FUCKING FERRET!?!? AYEE YOOOOO!!!!?!?!?#making a list of ideas becuse i have a million HELP ME GOD DAMN IT HELP MEEEEE#HOW DID I CHOOSE A BOBCAT FOR NACK SK FAST AND IM STUGGLING WITH FUCKIN CLUUTCH!???!?@#....still like the whole jessica rabbit idea tho- aka human with a...snthro chsrscter#i mean she was basicalky ace-#believe in cuddles and holding their animal partner becuse cuddles- (its very sweet to me)#...anyways-#fang the hunter#nack the weasel#sonic#clutch the opossum#sonic posting#idw sonic#sonic idw#losing my fucking mind rn over this all i swear....
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hakuno has received ... an egg!! that's right, this fragile-seeming, half-phantasmal pod that was nevertheless large enough to take two arms to lift and hold ... was absolute proof that anybody here was not human. a black fog rolls about in the murky, semi-opaque shell, like thick wildfire smoke encased in lighter cigarette fumes. was that nothingness drifting about the center an embyro? regardless, it was up to hakuno to decide what to do with it now. nobody would have blamed her if she handed it off to the authorities in the manner of a dutiful citizen, (after which, it certainly might not see the light of day ever again,) or fed it to a snake just to see what might happen. the enormous pool of blood is quite telling of an unfortunate mishap as well, yet the egg says nothing, its inhabitant fast asleep and subdued. who knew when it might wake up and be born again? who knew what, or even who, it would be born as, into?
unprompted, always accepting ! @tenkoseiensei ♡
there had been no issue in transporting the item to her quarters, though to the unassuming they'd think it to be a workload ill - suited for a lady of her stature, the size of it merely obscuring her sight, but such a thing didn't matter when one had the route to their destination memorized perfectly. there was no delay to her movement speed, nothing particularly of note. if anything, it was the blood that was ... unpleasant. ultimately, it was inconsequential, but it lingered in the back of her mind faintly. the scent of iron, the knowledge that it must've stained her clothes, it was so much. that amount must've resulted from—
the plastic bag tied to a close, the red color on the fabric still prominent against the translucent material, and hakuno tosses it into the bin. she washes her hands afterwards, a sigh coming from her as the water runs clear. her mind is similarly calm, no longer distracted by what shouldn't have taken that much of her time, she returns to the task at hand.
temperature, humidity, gaseous environment — verified. it is unclear what stage of incubation the egg is at this moment, but these conditions should be ideal ...
❛ if there is anything not to your liking, please let me know. ❜ she blinks at her own voice, uncharacteristic for her to speak when alone, thoughts kept all to herself without an issue— but, oh. vacant eyes turning to the egg ( carefully kept in an impromtu and specially made area ) , cool caramel eyes blink once more. to already be recognised as a presence by her should signify a sign of life; at the embryotic stage, at the very least.
this was something she should've confirmed at the scene where she'd first stumbled upon it, but even she could've picked up on the vague sense of a lingering threat. ‘ instincts ’ had seemed to kick in at that moment, and although bringing along this large egg was not the ideal choice to make in such a situation, the thought of leaving it behind was out of the question.
and now that the two of them are within safety, it seemed that she was able to speak with more ease; that was the logical conclusion to be made, anyway. ❛ do you know what it was that caused that— ❜ recalling that sight, hakuno's mouth briefly presses into a thin line. ❛ —blood spill ? ❜ it may be out of her field of concern, but she'll look into it. though at this moment, first priority comes to ... her guest.
it is ... what is it, exactly ? it looks somewhat ominous, if she were like a regular person / human, perhaps that would be the conclusion made. with how she is though, she merely accepts that as an aspect of this creature — the murkiness of its shell covering what lay beneath, she wondered if it was hiding. idle thoughts don't last long, thoughts turning to trying to find out just what this embryo was — as it was right now, she'll have to make do with what little she knew and ensure that the conditions were right for its sake.
it's unlikely. but, the possibility of— being able to hear the sounds and noise of the world around you, being able to hear everyone, yet to be unable to utter a single word. that is ... so unbearably lonely. taking a seat next to it, she faces forward in the same polite way of sitting, hands folded neatly by her lap. though her side gaze lingered upon the .. individual. ❛ i apologise, if you are speaking right now, i'm afraid i cannot hear you. ❜ what is she even doing ... well, to bombard the egg with questions in the first place was odd. ( not to mention, rude .. ) ❛ if you would like, please feel free to speak as much as you'd like when i am able to listen. ❜
shifting slightly in her position. ❛ and, if you have the intellectual capability for it in the future, please do tell me what it's like— to be born. ❜ how curious, even without any ties connecting the two, hakuno found that the outcome of the egg perishing was incredibly ... unsatisfactory. could this be the miracle of a life ? ❛ i wouldn't know. ❜ i was made, after all. whether her creation brought ‘ joy ’ or ‘ sadness ’ or maybe nothing at all, she wouldn't know. it doesn't matter. not anymore.
eyes crinkling just a bit, hakuno resists the urge to pat the egg — contact is unnecessary, lest she do so to turn it for the sake of the incubation process. instead, her mind wanders within her still frame. who are you ? what are you ? even without the answers, she tilts her head to face it fully, a vague flicker of warmth in the still pools of her eyes.
❛ you have a long life ahead, i hope you may soon hatch to live it. ❜
#tenkoseiensei#&&. message#q.#GENUINELY abt to pass out ovah this TSSUUUUNNNNN MY GODDDDDDDDDDDD#THIS MADE ME FEEL LIKE U INJECTED ×2 CAFFEINE DIRECTLY INTO MY BLOODSTREAM.!!!!!!! I LOVE IT SM SOBS#THANK YEW R DIS TSUNNIE DEAREST 🫶🫶💖 as u can see i . Enjoyed answering this a lot 🧎♂️#fun fact i cut some parts out bc i feel like it wasnt cohesive enough with the stuff here#(twas her theorizing what happened; she has a lil hypothetical situation abt the mom of the egg being unalived by sth#and felt guilt for not being able 2 prevent it </3)#also a lil bit where she pondered abt playing music or reading sth for the egg GEKVJSKFJSK#<- CAN STILL SEE THESE VERY MUCH HAPPENING BTW but jst not in this post specifically rn 🫡#also i still dk anything 4 this verse so i am levaing things Vague(TM) BUT YEAH I ADORE THESE TWOOO 🥹🥹🥹🥹🥹 IM GNNA DIE FR#also sorry for the wall of text egad but SNIFFLES THIS JUST- SUCH GOOD FOOD AUGGH /CLENCHES FIST/
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What songs have u been thinking of adding to strengths playlist :0 [and the others if u have any you’ve been thinking of for them] Also you could make a streatney+ playlist, just sayin
I have been creating a list of Set It Off songs to put in here, and this is on top of the ones ive already added. I am also just now realising that even tho i associate the band in general with Strength the distribution of songs does Not favour Strength much if at all.
Theres a few of the songs where its just the general vibe or just so much of the song works its hard to pick one section, but i went and grabbed some of my fav sections
Peekaboo; like i mean it LITERALLY says this what do you want from me
Why Not Me?; it feels alot like things a Strength vessel would say. I especially like the bit about „a little voice is shouting get up“
Catch A Break; i mean isnt that such a Witney concept, shes put thru so much bullshit after bullshit and everyone is So mean to her Constantly. And „same tragedy different day“ thinking about Witney,,,, hhnnnggg
Playing With Bad Luck; a very similar idea to Catch A Break because the guy is literally the whole time just talking about how all this bad stuff keeps happening but hes done nothing to deserve any of it, which again, yeah. Man thinking about Witney makes me Feral
Unopened Windows; honestly a streartney song to me but i feel like Witney would be the most nostalgic about it like this. Like hes def the one to look back at it like what-could-have-been the most
Who‘s In Control?; it especially makes me think of Anne at her peak blaming herself for Heart and all that, like „living in fear living afraid/hysterical every day“ TELL me that doesnt remind u of Heart and Anne in ibybf
Me W/O You; it feels vaugely manipulative and vaugely genuine in a way i can only compare to Heart. Plus the whole „theres no me without us“ over-reliance and codependence feels very Heart as well
And i didnt add a part of the song because i cant EXPLAIN it but. Dancing With The Devil in my head just makes me think of Streart. imagining it as like the two of them alternating screaming the lines at eachother, they both see eachother as the counterpart in the song. And this song also lead me to for some reason learning how to draw partner dancing Just so i could draw streart partner dancing and then also went a bit insane about who would be lead dw about it
#i dont know wjat to SAY to you about DWTD it just IS okay i thought it by accident and then Went Insane#maybe in the back of my head i was thinking about sashanne knife dance who knows#its like. a very violent but beautiful dance i think they would have#ANYWAYS SOBBING OVER WITNEY DONT TOUCH ME#admit it and taste of the good life. same sorta idea as liar and no disrepsect thats already on its playlist#i didnt include a ss of it because its the whole thibg but BETTER THAN THIS HEARTNEY REAL PLEASE#i have developed a version of the heartney dynamic in my head that im terrified to talk about because im scared i misinterpreted or am wrong#but yeah better than this is So hearts side to me. them lovibg her but being terrified they didbit wrong and scared her off before they coul#before they could fix it. mmmmmmm tasty mmmm munchy#and ohhh myyy fucking helllllll Different Songs. im feral about that song real#the lyrics r all about like they lived eachother they still live eachother but can they fix it/get along now theyre all so different#none of them are the same people they were the first time round can they even still make it work?#hnnnngggggg insane feral why do these ppl make so so FERAL HHNNNGGGGG eating biting ripping to shreads w/ my teeth rn maiming killing biting#also when i went to find that list i had put anti-hero by taylor swift beneath it and labeled it heart ????#i have not listened to antihero enough to make an educated call on that one but sure okay#Tree Man Posts#asks#wjh#strength#witney#heart#gem playlists#is that a tag i have?? What?? sure
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Final. Fantasy.
#🌙.rambles#oh no. i accidentally ended up rambling so much on my priv twt bcs of drk. again 😭😭#i think that's uhm enough for tonight though bcs i shld srs sleep soon (will definitely not but Still)#looking at old notes i have other ff quotes here n. vivi. sob. i rlly. rlly. want to replay ffix soon#this is embarrassing reading these n i srs see how much ff has influenced me. it's actually. really really embarrassing#my attention span help#ffxiv eden's promise. specifically promises to keep oh my god it's so. perfect. it's. heaven. to my ears.#i miss raiding T_T#NOOOOO SORRY MY ATTENTION SPAN JUST CHECKED MY SWITCH RQ#my aunt indeed has chrono cross the radical dreamers edition & girl oh my god that 225 hours on octopath#i. am just listening to music rn i cannot write i'll just do more later yeah FR THIS TIME#fr though just. i miss raiding so much. i rmb me n apollo being so woah bcs like. our static back on twintania had ppl from over europe ofc#from uk to france to germany. n some had turkish blood too iirc. damn i still rmb the accents oh my god.#apollo n i were like around 14 when we were raiding. which is pretty impressive oh my god we cleared the whole of eden's promise#i rmb how they'd ask how school was 🥺 n our fc/static lead was so kind i rmb how he'd check up on us too#I STILL RMB LIKE. smth like 'you two have been sick a lot lately' & 'you good? :c' or smth.#n then awww the way they'd say gn bcs we used to raid till 12 am n apollo n i had school yeah#i'm. really happy w my improvement. from sprout drk me i was so anxious to tank n now look i've cleared uwu <3#i miss the old twintania static. honestly i still wish that. i cld've unmuted even once yk? but. anxiety.#my social anxiety was really so bad back in 2021 but i guess i had to manage yk. ffxiv rlly helped a lot goddamn#i miss those days a lot. but i'll cry if i think more on that n of other stuff too so i'll just sleep soon#i. genuinely do know that i ramble too much but. actually nvm i'll ramble even more if i say that#i'll just. leave this at here. i'm really going to organize myself this week#sigh i wanted to do. more before i slept. like work on smth rq or. idk. but nah. anxiety. i'm tired. nah. gn#my playlists r a mess my notes r a mess heck even my room is a mess n i look like a mess n my mind is. even more of a mess#but being self-deprecating isn't.. really me but. oh no if i go on i'll ramble to myself abt my dilemmas again fuck this i need to shut up#rn at least i just need my mind to shut up. n oh in the end i guess tonight i won't rlly be able to do anything again but#nooo fuck it i'll just end it at that. so much to do.. so much to think about. but. nah sorry tonight i think i'm too tired. sorry#tbd
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its times like this when i really wish i had an SO's shoulder to cry on
Because I think i factrued/sprained my foot the other day it happened wednesday but its still pretty swollen and pops when i try to walk on it without hobbling. i know i signed up for health insurance through work. i wrote down the insurance company name as Bayside and I have my personal insurance id number but the card never came in/got lost in the mail (and i already called for one replacement that never came so idk if theyll send me a third) so i cant confirm the insurance name nor call them, but i need to because ive called/visited 5 health care facilities around me and NONE of them have even heard of Bayside. So im calling the phone number that my manager provided me with telling me that was the insurance company. I keep calling the number (and mind you ive called them before to try to get a second insurance card sent to me but that was in like April) and i get that its saturday but theres no answer and the stupid automated machine wont let me leave a voicemail. the automated answering voice on the phone also says that theyre called National Benefit Plans by SafetyNet and google says the phone number im using belongs to National Benefit Plans out in San Antonio Tx (i live no where near there). I found National Benefit Plans' website on SafetyNetPlus dot com but National Benefit Plans doesnt have their own website, just through SafetyNet, and also the SafetyNet website says on a side panel that "this is NOT insurance" and instead keeps saying "health benefits" instead so idk what the fuck ive been paying for for the last 6 months tbh and im having an emotional breakdown bc i dont want to fuck my foot up for life just cause i couldnt figure out my health insurance/benefits shit
#ive been fucking sobbing on the phone for 20 minutes calling the phone number over and over again#im about to mcfucking lose it and im sad and confused and scared because my foot is still so swollen even though it doesnt hurt very much#and google says if swelling on an injury like this persists after 48 hours to go get it looked at#all the walkin clinics near me dont have any xray techs til monday & quoted me anywhere from $130-$300 if i dont have insurance which i can#provide proof of nor am i even sure i actually have at this point and im ngl my guys i only have like $180 to my name until next friday#but then basically my entire next paycheck is going to Geico#and overall im just having a really really really bad time rn and im scared that if my foot is actually fractured im gonna fuck it up worse#by walking around on it without a boot/cast. yeah ive been sitting at work the last few days#but its front desk at a hotel so at least for the first hour of my shift and last 1.5 hours i HAVE to be standing#my foot was so swollen after work today it hurt to get my shoe off#im just really fucking stressed and anxious and confused and im sitting here sobbing my eyes out realizing theres literally no one i can#call just to vent and cry it out with#cant call my mom cause i busted my foot leaving her place after her husband got in my face & screamed at me for saying you cant hit people#cant call my siblings cause none of them can help/we dont talk often enough that i feel like i can burden them with this#i have a few casual friends but same sitch im not close enough with them that i feel comfortable venting while sobbing to them#i could call my ex but shes got a new boo now/its not her problem/we rarely talk anymore/she cant help so no point in calling#only other person who knows/is worried about me is my ex's mom but she wont be home from work for break til 2pm & its 11:30am rn#not close enough to any of my coworkers either#its times like this that i realize how truly alone i am these days with no one that can physically comfort me#which of course is only making me more upset#thats what i get for being depressed and reclusive the last 2 years and only letting people get an arms length reach from me emotionally#there is a medical clinic i can go to that is a 50 minute drive from me and without insurance you just pay a $20 sliding fee plus a little#extra for the care services but again theyre not open until monday and also its a 50 minute drive from me#so all im learning is i shouldve gone some place thursday morning after it happened and im fucked at least til monday#FUCK my STUPID BAKA life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#whatever. guess imma keep icing it try to keep it elevated and just endure it and hope it doesnt get worse#emma rambles#vent tag#DONT REBLOG
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Sooo... Not being able to sleep and crying for 3 hours didn't do me any good huh
#miranda talking shit#I want to die but otherwise I'm good#Learning in real time how little I mean is not a fun bonus when that's what I'm already crying about#I guess I'm just too hard and everyone is different but man being told “I don't want to see you suffering” as I am#And then having the person ignore me as I'm sobbing on the other side of the room... Jao#Words means less than dirt then. Men's solution to any bad emotion someone feels being “ok ill leave you alone”#Without asking... No. I don't expect therapy or extreme care but even just sitting next to me would have done so much more#But at least I get to practice my quiet crying skills#I went out on an 50 min walk at 3 am and the reaction I got was an text that asked where I'm going#His cats showed more concern for me and they have brains like babies#“if something happened you can tell me” why is it always with men that something must have happened suddenly?#No nothing new has happened but my life situation is garbage rn and I feel alone and isolated and unloved? But that's not something that#Is new. So no. Nothing happened I can't say that uh#Feel like dewie in mitm “I expect nothing and still I'm let down”#Ok rant over its 9 am yeah
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That tengen picture unleashed something inside me-
His fingers knuckle deep inside while he listens to your symphony of moans..
After he's done he licks them clean but he isn't done, nights still young after all
bestie, we are on the same page. And because I’m feeling a certain type of way, enjoy this scene from Tengen’s upcoming installment of Tell Me to Stop
VIOLENT DELIGHTS — NSFW SNEEK PEEK
bodyguard!Tengen x Assassin!Reader • enemies to lovers AU
A/N: giggling and kicking my feet rn.
CW: explicit sexual content • MDNI • fingering • edging • Tengen referring to Reader as a villain (affectionate) • rough sex • alley sex
“You’re a bastard.” But the ferocity of your insult is weakened by the way your back arches against the rugged stone of the alley wall; how you widen your thighs, a soft moan vibrating on your lips as Uzui sinks another finger into your wet heat.
The silver-haired asssassin only smirks as he leans in, close enough that the slightest movement would mean his lips would brush against yours.
He stills, leaving less than a millimeter between your mouths.
“But I am yours,” his breath is sweet and warm as it fans over your face. “And I’ll make you mine, even if I die trying.”
It is difficult to focus on anything but the hand between your thighs, pushed down the front of your trousers that he’d hastily untied when he’d cornered you in this dark alleyway.
Thick. The Sound Assassin’s fingers are so gods’ damned thick. He’d had you whimpering from just one, sliding in and out of your honeyed warmth with ease, your damn body betraying your desperate hunger for his.
The presence of the second finger stroking along your inner walls with each languid push of his hand has you gritting your teeth as the pleasure he bestows becomes edged by the faintest hint of discomfort.
It is maddening, how easily your body gives into his cursed touch. So much so that it sinks into your skin, ignites an itch that grows more incessant with each heaving breath.
You seek to take out some of your frustrations on his mouth. You stretch up on your toes, biting back a whimper at the way the tension in your legs and the new arch in your body pushes those wretched fingers deeper into your body.
Your hand seizes the nape of his neck and tries to jerk him down toward you.
Uzui tenses for a moment, his eyes widening before his mouth settles into a smirk, and he pulls back.
Those damnable magenta eyes flash with amusement at your responding snarl as you try and pull him down again, all to no avail.
“If it’s my lips you desire, then you’ll have to beg for them, sweet devil.”
The rough cobblestone of the wall scrapes against your back as you push harder into him. Your fingers twist harshly in his hair and you yank his head forward. “Kiss me, you damn brute —“
Your legs spasm as Uzui crooks his fingers inside you until he’s pressing directly on that rough patch of flesh deep inside your innermost wall — the one that had made you sob as he’d bullied it with the thick head of his cock weeks ago, when you’d thrown him down and taken him under the stars.
“Ah ah,” Uzui tuts, and the smug set of his mouth threatens to boil your blood. “Beg nicely.”
The slow, torturous massage of his fingers against that damn spot forces a trickle of drool from the corner of your mouth. Your tongue grows far too swollen, you head far too fogged, to even try and form the request he seeks.
Uzui, it seems, does not care that his hand is fucking you into a dumb stupor.
“Is your pride so great that you cannot muster a simple ‘please?’” He jeers, his eyes flashing with both lust and challenge.
He smirks, revealing a row of pearly white teeth as your thighs begin to quiver around his hand, your inner walls fluttering around each measured stroke of his fingers.
“It doesn’t matter. You’re about to come, aren’t you?” And his grin widens at the way you sink your teeth into your bottom lip, desperate to hold in the soft, breathy moans he knows you want to make. “Yeah, you are.“
His fingers wrench cruelly out from between your legs, leaving you with nothing but the ache of a rapidly fading high. But before you can howl you protest, before you can curse his name and his mother for the insult of his birth, Uzui flips you around and slams you into the alley wall.
His hand forces space between your groin and the stone, and without warning, he plunges his fingers right back into your soaking heat, clenching heat.
The moan rumbling in your throat feels distant and foreign as your eyes roll back. Uzui resumes his messy, hurried movements as though he hadn’t broken pace to begin with, and soon, your legs are vibrating where they’re pressed against the wall.
A sharp prodding against your backside brings you back down to earth long enough to realize Uzui is grinding wantonly against you, the rotation of his hips matching each thrust of his fingers.
There is no where for you to go; no where to escape. Not when your front is mashed against the alley wall, pinned in place by the heavy, suffocating mass of the Sound Assasin at your back.
Uzui’s teeth catch the lobe of your ear. “I know you, my darling nemesis. I know your body better than my own.”
The rational part of you screams to bite back; to fight, to show him exactly how he doesn’t know you at all, and how he’s an idiot for believing otherwise. But then, Uzui adds a third finger inside you, and the resulting stretch and burn between your legs is nearly as great as it had been when you’d first impaled yourself on his cock, all those weeks ago.
It was a sensation you’d been chasing ever since, only to be bitterly disappointed upon realization that no tavern boy, no cocky palace sentinel, could ever compare to the sheer mass of the King’s closest guard.
Resigned, you brace one palm flat against the stone wall, willing the bite of the rock against your skin to keep you grounded even as the silver-haired guard’s fingers threaten to send you free falling from some internal ledge. The other grasps wildly behind you in search of him, clutching at his hip and pulling him closer.
Uzui groans his approval into the side of your head, and he allows his great weight to smother you against the wall as he leans forward.
“Do you think I could have forgotten how it feels to have you climax around me?” His thumb swirls that bundle of nerves at the apex of your thighs as his fingers continue to pump steadily in and out of you. “Do you truly think I don’t spend my nights imagining you, perched atop me, using my cock the way you desire? That the memory of your face screwed up in pleasure — the feeling of your divine cunt wrapped around me — doesn’t haunt my every waking thought?”
He plunges his fingers inside you, all the way to his third knuckle. “You must answer for the torture you’ve inflicted, you cruel, wicked creature.”
You cry out right as Uzui strokes that inner spot once more, your hips twisting and grinding desperately against his hand as the thumb working your bead increases its pressure.
The bulge pressed right against your ass is rock-hard, and the thought of what lies beneath his trousers makes your mouth water.
The coil in your gut begins to tighten once more, this time more quickly than it had when you’d been facing him. Its pull is stronger, and the way his thick fingers keep grazing that sweet spot on your innermost wall all but guarantees you’ll be turned to liquid right there in that seedy alleyway.
You need his lips — otherwise, your screams will alert everyone within a fifty-meter vicinity of exactly how capable the Sound Assassin was of breaking you.
You try and warn him. “Uzui —“
“All you have to do, my sweetest torment, is beg.”
Your walls pulse violently around his fingers, a warning that you are mere seconds away from succumbing to brutal pleasure. Your hips begin moving on their own, grinding and checking desperately into his hand as the rough stone wall bites and scrapes against your exposed hips.
The need for him — for his lips — burns hot in your blood. It is maddening, this desire for his intimacy, and yet, try as you might, you cannot squash it.
You need it — need his kiss, need him to consume you whole.
“T-Tengen.” It slips out before you can stop it, your mouth forming the syllables with a startling ease.
Behind you, the Sound Assassin freezes, his hand stilling its maddening exploration of your core.
Never before had you called him by his given name; normally, you were in the habit of calling him every derogatory insult under the sun. At best, you’d called him Uzui.
Though you are turned away from him, you can feel the shift in him; the dark lust that settles over him, clouds whatever common sense he claimed to possess, replacing it with base need.
“That counts,” he growls in reply, and then the hand between your thighs resumes its task with more vigor than before, which the other snares in your hair and wrenches your head back.
The strain in your throat amplifies as Uzui roughly claims your mouth with his. He does not bother to wait for your permission before deepening the kiss; instead, he only tightens in hold in your hair, forcing you to gasp into him. The moment your lips part, his tongue sweeps past, branding you with each lick at the roof of your mouth.
You suppose it’s a good thing Uzui has smothered your moans with his feverish lips and demanding tongue. For the second his hand pulls away from between your legs, right as you’re on the precipice of cumming to pull that thick, monstrous length of his free from his trousers, you surely would’ve cried out in protest.
And that wicked mouth of his also manages to swallow the scream of pleasure that follows as Uzui enters you in a single, deep plunge, as well as your subsequent groan as you climax around him, just as he begins roughly fucking you against the alley wall.
#demon slayer#kimetsu no yaiba#tengen uzui#kny#kny x reader#kny uzui#kny fanfic#kny tengen#tengen x reader#demon slayer uzui#uzui x reader#demon slayer fanfic#demon slayer smut#kny smut#uzui smut#tengen smut#kny hashira
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:/
#why was i upset again???#diary#personal#i had like a meltdown last night. and i sorta just sat there sobbing for like an hour. then i went to bed.#when i woke up i was just like#anyways. i now am trying to eat breakfast. very unsuccessfully bc i am not eating currently.#id like porridge. but we dont have the one i like rn. so i have to settle for something else. its taken me 40 mins to decide#anyways now i have to MAKE the porridge. and im so burnt out from the meltdown its like. not gonna go well :/#like. ur telling me that while i feel like utter shit i gotta be around people????? and stand at the stove for GOD knows how long????#im gonna make the quickest porridge i can but still its not my day#i rly hope i dont have another meltdown today. bc im already like primed and raring to go for another.#god i hate them so much tho. bc i gotta be quiet i dont want anyone to hear me crying.#and like. honestly i generally get super agitated and lose my mind for a while. so like. if i was alone id probably be super loud n shit.#theyre very painful tho. internally that is. probably in part bc of how much i need to be quiet#cuz like. since i cant cry loudly. i just hold my breath! like!!! i probably sound like im hyperventilating!!!!#and honestly!!!! i have before!!!!! soley bc i cant breath enough when crying.#yeah. but you really can only cry for so long. so generally i eventually get tired and fall asleep.#or my mind sorta blanks out on me and i decide fuck it time to sleep.#so yeah. idk. meltdowns are very painful. its been a while since ive gotten that bad tbh?#whats more hilarious is i was perfectly fine until i tried to sleep. well. i wouldnt say perfectly i was stressed n tired#but nothing to indicate i was gonna meltdown or shutdown. i probably just got so overwhelmed that it sorta broke on me#and like. before i was in bed i had a task to complete so i had to focus on that and not how im feeling. so yeah.#idk. ill try to take care of myself today. but theres not much to be done. im gonna feel like shit for a while.#of course unless i get high or something. id feel a lot better instantly bc it sorta erasses the rough edges on things for me#so rather than feeling like my skin is pricked up and on edge (like i do now). id probably be just focused on food or vids#idk. its weird. and im tired. imma go eat.#drugs tw
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oh the yj batgirl is barbara!! cass cain is the second batgirl after the events of killing joke (she does not stay batgirl though)
also losing it at the playlist titles. i havent watched titans (didnt like the jason characterization for like half an episode and dropped it :pensive:) but it's what got me reading into dick hehe
ok i thought so!! also barbara is in titans
rip on jason tho i loved his arc bc fucked up anti heroes are the shit 😭
but also i have no context for how he is in other universes so *shrug*
BUT ALSO I LOVE HOW RAVEN IS??? an actual child?? when they started filiming she was like. thirteen and so she’s like. pretty much literally my age and i love that so much. also everyone in that fucking cast is gorgeous so i started for stargirl and i stayed for the mentally ill found family </3
EXCEPT. they just seemed to totally skip over him in young justice?? i think?? there are some moments in that show where im like. hey woah slow down i know nothing who is this???
#AND FR ON THE TITANS DICK GRAYSON I AM. ON THE FLOOR#if the playlist title didnt explain it i would let that man get away w ANYTHING and id be like ‘yup valif af he has his reasons’#AND RN IN TITANS HES LIKE. HAVING FUTURE VISIONS OF HAVING A KID AND I AM SOBBING BC HE JUST LOOKS SO HAPPY AND#*screaming*#i also love him in young justice bc this mfer really went ‘yeah i dont wanna be a leader’ in his FRESHMAN YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL#and like he’s just such a good guy but he still has flaws and UUUGH#ask#creetchure
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𝒏𝒐𝒕 𝒂 𝒍𝒐𝒕, 𝒋𝒖𝒔𝒕 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓, in which lando and his fiancée joke about having kids (cats), but they randomly just drop an actual pregnancy announcement! ౨ৎ lando x mexican!fiancée!reader
Liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, mclaren, oscarpiastri, and 109,122 others
yourusername que feo
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user get this girl a kid for christmas!
→ landonorris 😉😉
→ user bitch WHAT
→ user plot twist he gives her an actual kid instead 🤷♀️
→ user OH NAAH..😭
user QUE PRECIOSA
user are u guys still trying for a baby
→ yourusername yes i rlly want a kitten for Christmas landonorris
→ landonorris yeah and i want a hippopotamus for christmas
→ user okkk xmas king ‼️‼️
user i love u queen 🙏🏼 and your lil white boy 🫶🏼
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user jump-scare warning for the 1st pic yn
→ yourusername LMFAOO
→ landonorris babe you’re supposed to defend me
→ yourusername lo siento 😞
carlossainz55 por fin, un caption que es la verdad 😂
→ yourusername yo solo digo la verdad 😇
→ landonorris stop shit talking me guys!!!!
→ carlossainz55 pobrecito 😪
→ yourusername no, you THREW ME IN THE SNOW
landonorris SOOO HERMOSA 🤩
landonorris i don’t regret the last slide.
→ yourusername i see how it is.. calling off the marriage rn
→ landonorris BABY I WAS KIDDING I FELT REALLY BAD
→ user smh i’m already a child of divorce 😞
lilymhe 😍😍 become a runaway bride for me
→ yourusername ofc baby
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yourusername when he hangs out with the opposition… he’s cute though, I guess?
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user the opps 😒😒😷😷
user WHERES RHE CAT CAFE LOCATED QUEEN
→ yourusername tiki’s cat cafe in mexico city x
user my babygirl perfect angel pink princess bubblegum honey sweetheart sunshine shmuckums
→ landonorris that’s actually what i call her every morning
→ alex_albon good morning baby
user shes so gorgeous I just died dead
yourmom que preciosa mija ❤️❤️
→ yourusername te amo mami !!
landonorris DIOSA 😍😍😍
→ yourusername okkk mexican king 🤩🤩 !!
landonorris mi chula novia 👰♀️
→ yourusername 💕
maxfewtrell no
→ yourusername who r u
→ maxfewtrell fuck off
→ landnorris erm actually 🤓 don’t talk to my fiancée like that
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landonorris we found a cat in our chair after we finished swimming, welcome to the family zanahoria 🥕 (this is her only Christmas present)
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user OMG 😊😊 THEY HAVE A KID!!
user she’s so pretty
user LANDO U ARE THE LUCKIEST MAN ALIVE.
→ landonorris i know 😌
user UGHHHH IM SOBBING
user real baby next xx
→ user NOO GET OUTT 😭😭
user katnapped ❓
lilymhe she looks absolutely beautiful! uhm- and you’re there..
yourusername MY ONLY PRESENT?? YOU KIDNAPPED THE CAT
→ landonorris it was stray
→ yourusername u right.. i still deserve christmas gifts
→ landonorris i’m broke
→ yourusername …….🌝
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yourusername life update: back in my hometown, lando brought the helmet he quite literally dnfed in (🌝🌝), and my mom won’t stop showing him my baby pics. p.s. flo, can you please send me lando’s baby pics so he can stfu xx
December 21st, 2023
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user tbf the helmet is rlly nice
→ user his rep era 😢 gone too soon
user WAAAHHHH
user best couple ever idc
user she was such a cute baby 🥹
→ user imagine their kids 😭😭
landonorris flo please don’t send her my baby pics
→ yourusername too late baby xx
landonorris wow u are so cool!!!! i am your biggest fan 🤩🤩
→ yourusername I’M (getting) MARRIED!!!!!!😡😡😡
→ landonorris he doesn’t have to know…😉😉
alex_albon u look disappointed in the first pic
→ yourusername i am
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landonorris she isn’t dead!!
january 4th, 2024
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user YN 😭😭😭 its been a year daddy
user i missed them so bad
user dont talk to me im sobbing
user SHES ALIVE!! AND HEALTHY!!!
yourusername 😇😇❤️❤️
alex_albon is your cat studious
→ landonorris duh, just like his dad 😉
→ alex_albon didn’t u like… not go to high school?
→ landonorris i can still be studious, mate!!!!
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yourusername and it’s all just too much for little lando norris… surprise!! i am pregnant ❓(have been for like 3 months now)
tagged landonorris
march 1st, 2024
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user OH MY GOD. THEYRE HAVING A KID????
user i am hyperventilating shut up
user LMFAOO THE 2ND PIC
user what about us….. your og children ☹️☹️
→ yourusername don’t worry 💕 you guys are the og!!!
user whats it finna play.. WOAAAHHH
user im throwing up i. Jsut fell on the floor
landonorris te amo mucho mi vida ☀️🤍🫶🏼
→ yourusername i love you more 🫶🏼🧡
lilymhe CONGRATS BABY 🎉🎉
→ yourusername thank you 💙💙💙
carlossainz55 i guess he isn’t so little after all? 😂
→ yourusername LMFAO CARLOS 😭😭
oscarpiastri is he crying over your cravings? cause they’re horrendous
→ landonorris yeah i am, but anything for my girl
→ yourusername STOP 🥹🥹
→ oscarpiastri ew don’t get all corny on me
yourmom por fin!!!
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landonorris daddy norris 🔜
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user THE CAPTION? 💀
user i am so unbelievably happy for them
user mama y papa 💞💞💞
user who CHEERED
user omg she can’t have sushi until after the baby 😭😭
→ landonorris good.
user so i guess they were trying for an actual baby 😃
maxfewtrell mate get out with that caption
→ landonorris make me
→ maxfewtrell woah, you’re a soon-to-be-married man
→ landonorris 😐😐
yourusername 🔜
mclaren congratulations you two 🧡
→ landonorris thank you 🧡 (give me a life time contract??)
→ yourusername 🤍🤍
danielricciardo let me be the godfather (congrats mate 😁)
→ landonorris yourusername opinions?
→ yourusername uhmmmmmm
→ carlossainz55 let ME be the godfather
→ yourusername no güey
→ oscarpiastri pick me, choose me
→ yourusername 🐨🐨🐨
lnfour the soon to be better norris-l/n 💚
→ yourusername agreed
౨ৎ hi guyyysss 🤍🤍 sorry for not posting, i just didn’t have any motivation :,) but hopefully my motivation will come back though xx also i will prolly start writing part two of ‘say don’t go’ 🫶🏼
#𓇼 landitolover#꩜ my writings#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris x you#lando norris x y/n#formula one#f1#f1 fanfic#female reader#smau#latina reader#mexican reader#f1 x female reader#f1 x reader#carlos sainz#oscar piastri
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Award Season
Pairing: Charles Leclerc x hair stylist!reader Faceclaim: Jaylen Barron
✷✷✷✷✷
yourusername Salon de Platine, Monte-Carlo
Liked by kristin_ess, dakotafanning, charles_leclerc and 31,027 others
yourusername Last minute award season prep!
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kristin_ess So you're setting up your station next to mine right?
yourusername You realize the amount of chaos this would cause, right? dakotafanning Yeah but fun chaos
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charles_leclerc Do I get a spot in the chair?
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yn.wag16 Patiently waiting for mother to give us Charles red carpet content
bananas_for_leclerc Pls give us the red carpet content 🙏
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc Rest and recharge before the crazy
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pierregasly YOU LEFT WITHOUT ME THIS MORNING TÊTE DE BITE
charles_leclerc You were late, I have a beautiful girlfriend, what else was I supposed to do? yourusername Mon trésor, you make me blush ☺️
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yn.wag16 We are going to get FED this winter
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yourusername Los Angeles
Liked by charles_leclerc, amandlastenberg, kristin_ess and 34,193 others
yourusername Award season's here! Next stop: Oscars
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dakotafanning I owe you my LIFE
yourusername Girl, I have never seen that many broken bobby pins
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yourusername As long as you keep supplying me with cookies
yn.wag16 MOTHER
yn.wag16 Oscars Charles content incoming
bananas_for_leclerc The way that I will simply pass away
dakotafanning The Oscars
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dakotafanning 5 minutes ago @/yourusername was redoing @/charles_leclerc's hair for the ninth time and now look at her
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yourusername And he's still not ready 🫠
charles_leclerc I am to! yourusername Then why are we all waiting by the elevator on you? landonorris She got you on that one bananas_for_leclerc He better look amazing with how long he's getting ready for
amandlastenberg We look GOOD tonight
kristin_ess Yes babes!
yn.wag16 Literally about to vibrate out of my chair with excitement for tonight oh my GOD
dakotasfan The fact that they're all posting each other tonight instead of themselves I'm going to sob
bananas_for_leclerc GRASPING for any Charles red carpet content I can get my hands on PLEASE I am no longer asking
yourusername The Oscars
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yourusername Not him being the reason we were the last ones on the carpet
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charles_leclerc I was not, you speak lies
yourusername No I don't amandlastenberg No she doesn't dakotafanning No she doesn't kristin_ess No she doesn't charles_leclerc ...damn
pierregasly So he can clean up
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yn.wag16 IT'S HERE
yn.wag16 CHARLES RED CARPET CONTENT IS HERE
lechairs_love I can't.... I'm done... he looks like he's about to cause so much chaos in the first one
bananas_for_leclerc I can't breathe
charles_leclerc
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charles_leclerc Afterparties after afterparties yet she still manages to look gorgeous
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yourusername Only because I have the world's best eye candy
charles_leclerc No I do dakotafanning y'all are making me feel incredibly alone
amandlastenberg It is four in the morning and we're just getting back to the hotel now
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pierregasly I'm coming along next year, no arguments
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bananas_for_leclerc I need to get myself a Charles...
yn.wag16 GOD I'm so feral over them
lechairs_love If you'll excuse me I'll be sleeping on the highway tonight
yourusername Monaco
Liked by charles_leclerc, amandlastenberg, dakotafanning and 43,488 others
yourusername Back home and ready to relax
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charles_leclerc My favorite audience
yourusername Play for me again, Charlie charles_leclerc Anything for you, mon cœur
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yourusername ☺️
yn.wag16 GOD
yn.wag16 I can't do this anymore
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#f1 fanfic#f1 social media au#f1 x reader#f1 x you#social media au#charles leclerc x reader#charles leclerc social media au#charles leclerc fanfic#charles leclerc smau
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