#a social life
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I had issues with my vestibular system that got so bad i had to drop out of college and stop working for 8 years. I always explain the 8 year gap in my resume with "medical issues" and people except that just fine but if when getting to know people better i go into further detail every time i say "i would get dizzy" people would kinda give me this vibe like "oh thats it?" They wouldn't say it, i would just kinda get a vibe like they thought i was battling cancer or something serious but its just the spins so thats not that bad.
Hey, I know chronic pain is absolute hell for physically disabled and chronically ill people, but can we also talk about the chronic discomfort symptoms?
Like, it doesn’t hurt per se, but it sucks ass.
Like involuntary movements, making it hard to move or function
Nausea, the absolute BITCH
confusion, brain fog, forgetfulness
Getting lightheaded or dizzy or problems with the vestibular senses
RESTLESSNESS
Numbness and tingling
Fucking fatigue. Like the kind that makes you feel like a rubber noodle that weighs 800 tons and you can hardly left an arm.
Weakness in general, like that’s annoying as hell. Why can I not open this bottle.
I haven’t experienced this, but I imagine full or partial paralysis is pretty sucky.
Trembling. Like, sometimes not even because something hurts. Your just shaking, vibrating, man. What.
So yeah. Complain about discomfort from your disabilities and illnesses, you deserve it.
#but actually i could barely leave the house#i lost everything#friends#a social life#college#job experience#im battling to get back on track#and#the psychological issues of always feeling like im behind#but it wasnt a life threatening illness so nobody takes it seriously
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"We know too well that our freedom is incomplete without the freedom of the Palestinians."
~ Nelson Rolihlahla Mandela.
#my people#southafrica4palestine#palestine#free palestine#free gaza#free west bank#gaza#gaza strip#israel#social justice#human rights#apartheid#genocide#middle east#south africa#the starbucks boycott is for life#jerusalem#tel aviv#🇿🇦🫶🏻🇵🇸
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This is for the people who didn’t party in their teens and twenties. For the people who didn’t have that “coming of age” movie experience with shenanigans and revelations. This is for the people who mostly keep to themselves. Who maybe prefer things to be quieter and gentler. This is for the people who don’t feel like they belong in a culture that values loud parties and flashing lights. I see you. And you are valid.
#teenagers#early twenties#late twenties#growing up#childhood#nostaliga#introvert#homebody#quiet life#outcast#shy#college#university#high school#neurospicy#neurodivergent#mental health#mental illness#social anxiety#it’s okay
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Networking/Knowing A Guy: A Guide
This is the autism website. Now, as an extension of the power of love and friendship, there are few things more useful than Knowing A Guy. Knowing A Guy means you have a support network. Knowing a plumber, or a tax accountant, or just that one dude that's really fucking good at finding the information you need when you're really overwhelmed, can be the difference between being able to pay rent and having a fun party with friends to fix your shit.
How does one end up Knowing A Guy? It's a skill you can develop called Networking and it is one of the foundations of society. Unfortunately making those connections with people is fucking hard and nobody makes a tutorial for it. So, here you go:
The golden rule is you scratch my back and I scratch yours
It is necessary for survival to seek out useful people
Great news! Everyone is useful in some form or fashion - including you! When given the opportunity to learn about someone, do it! Extroversion does not come naturally to some people and that's okay. Just take whatever falls in your lap.
Types of usefulness: trade skills, connections of their own, personality you jive with, pleasant to talk to, niche interest in shared hobby, security - the list is pretty much endless. I know a guy that lives in the metro area - no job, no major hobbies, inoffensively annoying to me personally, kinda ignorant, not attractive to me, but you know what? He knows how the fuck to get around the city by foot. My rural-raised ass APPRECIATES the guide.
Remember important information: general personality, background, skillset, likes and dislikes. You can find this information by making smalltalk about their life. There is no such thing as pointless conversation. (Yes, even the annoying smalltalk)
The more people you know, the higher the likelihood that one of them will be useful in a given situation - or will know someone who is.
It is overwhelming. In a given clique/community/workspace/whatever, there is A Guy Who Knows The Other Guys. This Guy is a shortcut. Find them. They're often elderly, extroverted, a little bit annoying, a secretary or in some otherwise forward-facing position. Look for people that are gossipy/talk about other people a lot but not in negative ways. If they constantly talk shit, they'll talk shit about you too. They're still useful but be careful with the information you share
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.
You do not have to like someone for them to be useful.*
If you have low self esteem, you're going to feel like you're using people. You're not. That's the devil talking. People like feeling valued and the connections you are making are the threads holding community together. Recognize people for their talents. It's only a problem when you're taking advantage of people
So: don't feel scummy about it. You're an animal. You have to claw out your right to survive and people will respect you more for it.
Luckily mutualism is the name of the game in the animal kingdom. Offer something back. The foundation of a Know A Guy relationship is Mutual Benefit
Sometimes that Mutual Benefit is just spreading news of the The Guy far and wide. My plumber friend is my actual friend and I love her to death, but I'm maintaining our backscratch relationship by pimping out her plumbing business to anyone that'll listen
Food is a good Mutual Benefit. People across cultures for all of human history have bonded over food. I have good success asking people for a favor and then offering to buy them lunch in return **
General compensation is also good. Offer a service in return and always do your best to offer financial compensation as appropriate. Having your plumber friend take a look at your drain: doable with a case of beer. Having your plumber friend redo the pipes in your entire house? You need to pay for that.
Being transactional is not necessarily a bad thing. I would advise against keeping an itemized list of things owed, but fish don't seek out cleaner shrimp just because they enjoy their company. Everyone gets something
Unfortunately being extroverted and generally personable is a huge benefit here, but that's the value of the Guy That Knows A Guy. There's someone out there that has consolidated All The Guys so you don't have to be the local expert. Always remember nobody can do everything and you don't need to master every skill
* This is the foundation of a functioning community. I have many acquaintances that I find incredibly annoying. They include doctors, welders, artists, social workers, lawyers, construction crew and random fuckers at the grocery store. I do not hang out with them. I do not have to in order to maintain a civil Know A Guy relationship. I can drop them useful tidbits and fuck right off so I don't have to spend any more time than necessary with them
** People may assume romantic intent. Be prepared for that. I generally denote that it's a friendly/work lunch by calling them bro at some point if they're my age. Otherwise my general demeanor is sufficient to show that I do this with everyone
Source: personal experience, mother's teachings of crime, booth vending and poverty
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sorry danny, sam will never think you’re cool
#danny phantom#danny fenton#sam manson#theres some ocs#college au#sam’s goth book club#i feel like she’d make a lot of good friends at a college#the trio has a highly rehearsed excuse for danny being weird#nobody has any idea what ecto-contamination is bc it doesn’t exist#ghosts are common-ish knowledge by now and amity is the known epicenter#stranger: holy shit your hand just went through that wall#danny: yeah it’s a medical condition :(#fentonworks is in on it too#for credibility#too bad the goths wanted vampires#moving to a new city did wonders for dannys popularity though#he’s got a lot he’s hiding so he can’t really take advantage#he probably knows more people number wise#but has less friends than sam#Tucker has a thriving social media life#but doesn’t get out much#hence that technus comic#can’t believe I finished this#lit took a whole ass week#hahahaha
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sometimes it's not even enemies to lovers. sometimes you get handed the leash of a snarling, barking dog against your will and realize with dawning horror that you are now responsible for teaching it not to bite
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#Social media#true#keep going#keep moving forward#don't take it personally#don't take it too seriously#living in the present#living for myself#new life#new beginnings#new me#new day#new you#reminder#life lessons#life
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having good & true friends will literally save and protect you in a million unfathomable ways. like okay we have written so many times about lovers. but the way a platonic friend laughs and cries with you. the way they hold your hand at 14 years old and at 34. the way they keep a little silver tie to you, touching base over and over and over. how you can go years without talking, only to re-meet and discover: oh shit! you're still cool!
there are people who have been in my life for more than half of it, and i have loved every version of them. do you know how fucking beautiful that is. yeah love will save the world. but the way friends love you is gonna save the you.
#and before one of u is like '' i have no friends :(" i used to be there too actually#abusive partner cut me off from ALL of 'em. i didn't think i was lovable#it made me EXCEPTIONALLY shy. i still am actually!!!!#i just ... started saying ''yes.''#i would take pictures of flyers in my library and go to whatever events they had#i started taking community classes#if someone mentioned like ''i am gonna start x group'' i actually took a deep breath#and approached them to be like . okay i want in.#i started making the first move with new people - a small compliment#a smile or a little joke. just to share the space with them.#i have MASSIVE social anxiety. bad parent and bad relationship will do that to ya.#but i just... kept going. and going. and going. to each of these little things. and then...#like. .... idk i just am very blessed. i have a STUPID number of friends#a lot of which i reconnected with. bc it turns out love is never wasted. adult life just.#like. gets in the way. but also... i loved u as a weird little kid. i love u now as a weird big adult.#i promise i PROMISE ur friends are out there. u just have 2 find them. and btw#i didn't make friends with everyone. but i did get a lot of people to smile or laugh.#aint that something.#this process took me something like 2 years. it was HARD!!!!!!!!!!#i love u!!! hard things are often worth it!!!
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main take aways from Halloween (1978) rewatch:
michael myers is canonically 21??? this bitch should be at the club
*sees tiddies* ***MURDEROUS RAMPAGE NOISES***
that's it that's the movie
outside of the fact that everyone who has sex is murdered by the narrative, this is a surprisingly chill portrayal of female sexuality? these teen girls are horny and actively enjoying Getting It On with their boytoys. no pushy boyfriends sneaking in through their bedroom windows--these ladies are taking the initiative to sneak out and GET SOME. one of them gets laid and then immediately orders her boyfriend to get her a beer. (yes she gets Slashered soon afterward, but so does the boyfriend so honestly, gender equality.) yes the Final Girl is the only one not having sex, but she's not bullied for that, nor are her friends slut shamed except possibly by being murdered by the narrative
actually the only character who is shown being morally condemned on-screen is michael myers. specifically FOR his violent overreaction to other people's sex lives. (people he is spying on). metaphorically, the villain is American Puritanism sticking its judgy nose into other people's business.
aka Michael Myers Is A Republican
but actually the real villain is the doctor. guy's a judgemental, shaming, pathologizing asshole. and he's been in charge of michael's care since he was SIX YEARS OLD? kid never had a chance. i'd go on a killing spree too
also the parents. where are the parents? it's halloween night and all the teenage girls are home babysitting their younger siblings? come to think of it, michael's first victim was his own older sister, whom he killed while she was babysitting him. teen girls are really shouldering a labour burden here. maybe parentification is the true villain
side note: mike commits his first murder wearing a clown costume...which is never referenced again? his 'iconic' costume is a generic mask and wig and jumpsuit, when we coulda had a Killer Clown Michael Myers??? travesty
i like how the Final Girl and her friend casually smoke weed in her car. yeah she's an honor student and her friend is the sheriff's daughter. yeah they smoke weed. so what it's 1978
(to reiterate, mike is 21 and should be at the club. im not saying he shouldn't be rampaging, im saying it's sad that he broke out, tasted freedom for the first time in his life, and immediately snuck back into his childhood home to go rampaging. let's have a remake where he goes to a nightclub and has a few beers. maybe some slutty dancing. then rampage)
oh no he's hot
#HALLOWEEN#halloween the movie#michael myers#do you think he's a mike? mikey? to his friends? if slashers had friends?#i'll be honest i was expecting this movie to be way more of a bitch to its female characters#i mean yeah they died but so did some dudes#there's just a lack of cattiness compared to the way most later movies portrayed teenage girls idk#yeah the Final Girl is a Virgin and a Bookworm. but there's no bullying or any strong sense that's she's morally superior to everyone else#mostly she AND the other girls feel a bit sorry for her lack of a social life. one even tries to set her up with a date to the school dance#solidarity! trying to get your nerd friend laid!#overall it's just teenagers being teenagers and then a slasher comes in and ruins everything with his Lack Of Chill#like yeah dude sometimes teenagers have sex. get over it#also something to be said about how while the girl who survives is the one who isn't sexually active and dresses conservatively...#ultimately those things aren't ENOUGH to prevent her from being targeted#you could say that the other girls 'provoked' the villain (the same way women irl are so often accused of provoking their attackers)#but ultimately that doesn't keep the Final Girl safe. it just delays the inevitable.#because violent men never need excuses. no matter how eager society is to provide them.#ultimately she is at the mercy of the same violent whims because it was never her behavior that invited the violence.#gendered violence doesn't need an invitation.#also she doesn't save herself the doctor saves her#it's not her actions or choices that put her in danger OR save her from it--once again it is the whim of a man#no this wasn't intended to be a feminist movie it's just fun how you could argue it that way
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when grian lowkey saved scar from dying
#grian#goodtimeswithscar#tangotek#desertduo#wild life#life series#mcyt#my art#Linktoo art#that ep was sooooo goooddddd#this was a quick warmup but people seemed to really like it on twitter so im throwing it up on other social media
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I think all dating norms need to get like 30% more aspec and polyamorous and everyone in the universe would be so much happier
#imagine if we lived in a world where ppl entered romantic relationships because they liked each other and not to broadcast social status...#marina marvels at life
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Thinking about the time I lost a game of Overwatch and I was so mad about it that I genuinely considered getting into shit with the other team in chat and then realized that it was a colossal waste of my living breathing Human Time and uninstalled Overwatch instead because it was only making me angry.
And then thought about the OTHER time when I was on TikTok and realized I was Not Enjoying Myself and was, in fact, seeing so many sad videos and fake influencer ads that I felt Truly Despondent and then just…Deleted it.
Imo I want my social media /general media experience to be a pleasant break from real world and I get to decide what I get to cull to make that a reality for myself. I highly reccomended it! Life has improved considerably!
#look not having social medias is not My Personality#however like. no twitter. no insta. no tiktok.#do I know anything???? no.#am I up to date on literally anything pop-culture????? also no#and if that stuff’s important to you absolutely stick with it!#maybe this is a direct reaction to growing up terminally online from 2012 onward but i am freeeeee#it’s honestly made a huge difference in my life! i CAN just say no to these apps that want to suck all my time away!!!!
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Traits I’ve Noticed in Confident People
Disciplined - if a target is set, it is achieved
Speaking - Can speak multiple languages. Can express thoughts clearly even if vocabulary is limited. The listener understands their point.
Strong extroversion socially - can approach and talk to new people with ease, but also make them feel comfortable. Good at following up, asking questions and inserting little stories about themselves without exposing too much
Strong general knowledge / industry knowledge. They know what they’re talking about
Hard to please but not arrogant about it. They won’t readily accept a fact or opinion, even if the majority agrees - they’ll debate with it, think over it, play the devil’s advocate
Good posture
Strong set of principles and self control. There’s no shame in wanting to say, help someone, choose not to drink socially, buy a coffee for a poor person on the street; they don’t hesitate to do good deeds
Hygienic. Clean, groomed, well dressed, well maintained.
Observant and proactive at the same time. Can pick up on body language relatively easily - can sense discomfort or unease in someone and do something about it.
Have a strong sense of self identity. Can be opinionated but open to challenges.
#c suite#powerful woman#strong women#ceo aesthetic#personal growth#that girl#productivity#getting your life together#balance#Confidence#confident traits#how to be confident#How to be yourself#being social#socialising#stand out#glow up
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A post for Hilda
When I was a kid, I had lots of room to run around outside. It was a beautiful place to live. Running from one side of the property to the other would take you probably about a minute. There was plenty of grass, plenty of trees, plenty of wildlife. I couldn't ask for better.
Hilda, pregnant with her firstborn child, has been lying awake all night; fretting over the slow trickle of the donations that just barely keep her alive. Knowing that the water is contaminated and the little food she is lucky enough to eat is insufficient nutrition for the life kindling inside her, no doubt the little one feels her stress already.
When I was a kid, we had a few plastic barrels lying around, and we had enormous fun kicking them down the slope to watch them roll away. We'd chase them all the way down to the bottom of the hill, and then push them back up again. Push, push, push. And then we could do it all over again.
It's a great and daunting thing to ask for help. Yet Hilda has braved this uncomfortable, exhausting charade for days upon days upon months upon months, and is still struggling. She needs to eat! She needs to be warm and healthy and safe! She needs to know that there are good, kind people in the world who care what happens to her. She needs our support. Today, tomorrow, and the day after that. Every day until she can say, "Thank you. I am okay now."
Hilda, sister I didn't know I had, I hope you can rest a little easier soon. I hope these words stir the hearts of our community and they push the barrel with me. Every pair of hands that pushes this barrel moves it a little further up the hill to where it needs to go, and I promise, when we're done, we can admire the view together.
Follow @hildanasr1 and maybe frigidwife and veryveryvomit too (they care about her just as much as I do) Vets: gaza-evacuation-funds #6 | bilal-salah0 | khanger | ana-bananya | a-shade-of-blue | dlxxv-vetted-donations
#Support Hilda Fight for Life and Family in Gaza#gaza#free gaza#palestine#free palestine#vetted#funds needed#go fund her#human rights#social justice
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trc twitter au ✨
#thanks u mr siken for being active on twitter i owe u my life#trc social media au#ronan lynch#trc#the raven cycle#the raven boys#pynch#Richard siken
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