#Young Sheldon quote

[random-twst-things]

Grim: This isn't the Hello Kitty store?

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: It looks...

Lilia: Nope, it's Burning Discussion

Grim: What's the discussion? Devil worship?

Mc/N/Yuu: GRIM!

Grim: WHAT? THIS PLACE LOOKS SCARY

Mc/Y/N/Yuu: No it doesn't! It looks unique and interesting

Mc/Y/N/Yuu, turning to Lilia: I apologize on Grim's behalf 😔

Grim: The great grim has nothing to be sorry for! All I did was give an opinion 😒

(Burning Discussion was supposed to be twsts version of Hot Topic 🧍🏽‍♀️)

(I couldn't bring myself to change "Hello Kitty" to "Greetings cat" 😭)

Dividers by/from: @/cafekitsune

[carrythispictureforluck]

Sirius and Remus in jail on the Canadian border after trying to smuggle cigarettes across to pay for adoption fees.

Sirius: Oh! We could name the baby after cigarettes

Remus: Excuse me...

Sirius: Yeah, what a cute funny story it would be to tell. Virginia like Virginia Slims..

Remus: Mmmk that's enough from you today * slides across bench seat away from him *

[lung-worm2023]

“-And now I’m gonna have to get a new note book because mine has missy and Marcus written all over it.”

[vivianthepigeon]

Tim: “I need to tell you something”

Bruce: “What did you do??”

Tim: “when Alfred was doing our taxes he noticed a missing check”

Bruce: “what did you do???”

Tim: “Before I answer do you trust me enough to understand that it was for a good reason and just leave it at that?”

Bruce: “What. Did. You. Do.”

Tim: “it’s all Jason’s fault! He is a BAD person, I’ve been telling you for years!”

—————

Bruce to Jason: “WHAT DID YOU DO?”

Jason: “okay now before I answer that-“

Bruce: “just tell me whatcha did”

Jason: “I got a DUI”

Bruce: “Jason!”

Jason: “it’s not as bad as it sounds”

Bruce: “How is driving drunk not bad???”

Jason: “I wasn’t exactly driving”

Bruce: “I don’t follow.”

Jason: “I was at the bar with Damian and I had a few”

Bruce: “DAMIAN?!”

—————

Damian: “With God as my witness I’ve never been to that bar in my life.”

Jason: “He knows.”

Damian: “Oh I’ve been there a bunch”

[batfamgalore]

Jason: You’re gonna believe Catwoman over your own brother?

Dick: Well one of you called me super smart and the other one is yelling at me right now.

[liv45no]

Sirius, brushing his hair: ...98, 99, 100!

Regulus: you missed eleven numbers.

Sirius: I don’t need to be good at math. I have BEAUTIFUL hair.

Regulus: that’s the saddest thing I’ve ever heard.

[dead-sane-stuff]

Batsis: you guys, I just bumped into Damian's Mom on the way over here.

Damian: WHAT!? Are you Insane?

Batsis: nah, Bruce had me tested.

[incorectquoteswlw]

Kate and Yelena are arguing when Yelena mutters something under her breath.

Kate: Wait, what did you say?!

Yelena: Nothing, I didn't say anything!

Kate: Hmmm...

Yelena, under her breath: ... I'm gonna say it twice. I'm not stupid.

[mackerel22]

Dazai: And then Chuuya walked by ignoring me like I wasn't there.

Odasaku: Does he even know you like him?

Dazai: Idk, I've been ignoring him, been mean to him. What else can I do?

Odasaku:

Ango:

Odasaku: Sounds you've tried everything.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

Karai, about Mikey: It's my only brother's birthday!

Leo, Raph & Donnie: Excuse me??

Karai: Fine. It's my FAVORITE brother's birthday!

Leo, Raph & Donnie: Better.

[pooks]

Charlie: Oh no, we're going to jail! Percy: Bill's going to jail. I'm saying I was kidnapped. Charlie: That's a good plan. You and I were kidnapped. Bill: If I'm going to jail, we're all going to jail!

#disaster older siblings

[sxphr]

Bianca: Wait, Enid, how much is your car insurance a yeah?

Enid: I don't have car insurance.

Bianca: You don't- How do you drive without car insurance?

Enid: Slowly.

[raphael-angele]

Tummy Ache

Nico: *gets a tummy ache and raises his hand* Chiron: Yes, Mr. di Angelo? Nico: I have a tummy ache, I'd like to see the doctor. Octavian: A tummy ache? Nico: Yes, OcTavian. I have a tummy and it aches, ergo, tummy ache Octavian: Ergo? Nico: It's latin, OcTavian.

[incorrect-bhaalspawn-quotes]

Halsin: That reminds me of the time when there was two frogs on one of my nature walks and I accidentally licked the hallucinogenic one.

Wyll: Why lick either?

Halsin: Low blood sugar combined with an insatiable curiosity.

[incorrect-maraudersaandco-quotes]

Lily: Have you lost your mind? James: Okay, in our defense... Lily: You have no defense. You're idiots. Peter: That was a big part of our defense.

[liv45no]

Sirius: how come math is easy for Reg but hard for me?

Andromeda: I don’t know, Sirius, but you have your own gifts.

Sirius: like what?

Andromeda:

Sirius:

Andromeda:

Andromeda: you have very pretty hair.

Sirius: true.