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dykedvonte · 12 days ago

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Curly's little blurb on his steam trading card just keeps reminding me he is a much more miserable person than people realize.

We don't get a lot of his thoughts, inner confliction that aren't bogged down by what Jimmy says or does. Even in the The Last One and Then Another, his dialogue is reflective, not the Curly before the crash but the result of everything. Parts of the him he was are there of course, but also disfigured and warped beyond recognition just like he is physically.

Curly really doesn't think much of himself and desires. He clearly chases fleeting moments of happiness. He doesn't really have prospects for himself, assumes in a similar way to Swansea, that if it should make it happy then he is happy. Though, he hasn't reached the point Swansea did to admit it doesn't. He neither sees the glass half full or empty, it's just water, something he needs and he'll take it from any perspective.

He wasn't running from anything but he's never really been going towards something either. He's listless. I've been using the term complacent to describe how he feels about his life and the closest people (really just Jimmy) in it, but now that word feels too neutral, too nice. Happier than Curly really was. There isn't just one word for it, he's unfulfilled, uncertain, uninspired. There are no active problems he faces and that's the issue, why should he be upset?

I believe he really is a person who doesn't know who he is or wants to be. He follows a structure. I don't think he's suicidal, but he clearly doesn't think about what makes him happy. He's numb. I suppose that is a better word than complacent, used to the feeling even if he hates it. It doesn't hurt so why stop it?

#like curly is very much does his job goes home takes care of self repeat i dont think hes like an asocial person but he doesn't take the tim #time to indulge in himself the way he thinks hes a bigger picture guy so as long as nothing is disrupted hes relatively okay even if its #slowly chipping away at him and making him feel hollow like he thought space was endless that he could never reach a point of feeling finis #he never had to predict what to do after the end and suddently he realizes there was no end to it because there cant be an end to nothing #hes accomplished so much objectively but hes done nothing with his life outside of his work like he mentions no hobbies other friends or an #thing of the sort he doesn't even feel like he can vent it cause what? hes complaining about how hard it is to get promoted to have securit #in a job you hate and a position that keeps weighing you down like I feel like if he explained himself at the party and didn't let Jimmy t #talk for him hed actually have made points the others would get cause even if they envied his position he still is justified in being unhap #not everything that you think would bring you happiness does or fulfills even a small part of that desire #idk hes a lot more fucked in the head but like towards himself than people realize like how he lets Jimmy treat him is indicitive of that i #mouthwashing #mouthwashing game #captain curly #curly mouthwashing

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rikdraws · 7 months ago

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Happy Zineday errbody! Checkit out at https://www.patreon.com/rikdraws or not, I'm not your dad! But I do love you. So give me money. That's how this works, right?

#sonic boom #sticks the jungle badger #sticks the badger #boom eggman #boom knuckles #knuckles #knuckles the echidna #dr eggman #sonic the hegehog #riks adventures in shameless self promotion #no but really can you spot me a fiver money is pretty tight right now and there are some guys outside that look kinda shifty

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cuteniaarts · 4 months ago

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Small drawing collection of my latest creation Emran as a teenager/freshly minted Air Acolyte, for my dear partner in unhinged OC shenanigans @katkastrofa, as promised <3

#my art #artists on tumblr #the legend of korra #original character #I need to figure out a way to tag these guys #like with renny and dori I just put sotrl in front of their names and that works #but emran is technically an LaF character. though not uniquely tied to that verse. and idk what to do with Ila and Alasie #maybe I need to have some unique oc tag or smth. I’ll figure it out #if you’re wondering why I stayed up until half past 7 a.m to draw this it’s because I needed some way to cool down #after the kuviren smut absolutely broke my brain #and what better way to do that than by drawing my sweet baby boy?#yes lmao he went from baby girl to baby boy in like 24 hours. fucking sue me #but actually. actually!! they’re both. they contain multitudes :)#they probably haven’t even realised that at this point and are still in disguise #convinced that she’ll be punished for her deceit if anyone found out that she’s actually a girl #(okay off topic but the switching pronouns are really fun lmao)#but give them time. they’ll figure it out soon enough. in these pieces they’re slowly getting used to temple life #and that is the first step to self acceptance #I’m actually extremely proud of these. especially the one with the apple basket. I feel like the androgynous vibes are really there #and he looks like his brother the most in it #but the others are fun too. I loved doing the portrait. I should do them more often #and.. I will admit. I traced the lemur. I can barely draw people okay how do you expect me to draw animals #but I just think that Aiza would really love a little lemur friend #animals don’t judge and she doesn’t have to watch herself around them. she can just be. plus the lemurs are really cute <3 #I want to eventually do a companion to this with Aiza instead. maybe from back before she ran away #probably something based on reflection from Mulan too bc the vibes are there. though.. to be completely honest #I’d say they have a lot more of Shurochka Azarova’s vibes than Mulan. but that’s just my love for Soviet cinema taking over #it’s essentially if mulan fought napoleon instead. and when discovered instead of left to die they promoted her to lieutenant 😁#I realise the comparison is completely incomprehensible to everyone but me but.. go watch the hussar ballad. it’s free on YouTube with subs #okay enough rambling. i shall now go to bed. @ Kat I hope this brightens up your morning at least somewhat. I love you!!

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sparky-is-spiders · 2 months ago

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tell me about the Jon Isolation AU!

This ask carried me through microeconomics homework, econometrics lab, microeconomics class, econometrics class, AND worries about Big Future Assignments! So thank you very much <3

This is a fun one cause I actually have the first draft of the first part written!! It's basically a version of one of my favorite personal Jon plotlines where he moves into the Archives and has no social support system. Desperately in need of a rewrite to sand away the rough edges tho lmao.

Alright I won't lie: this AU was born when I was thinking about creating an Archivist, and why it wouldn't work if you just stuck someone in a room, made them read a bunch of statements, and then dropped 14 marks on them (because that would be much easier, faster, and more efficient than what happened in the podcast, but that's not what Elias did). And then I (world's most normal Jon enjoyer) thought about Elias doing that to Jon. And then, I (and I cannot stress this enough: world's MOST NORMAL Jon enjoyer) started thinking about. The most reasonable. Effective. Low-effort. Jon kidnapping plot. And then I wrote about 5k words. And then I left those to languish in the WIP folder, just like Elias leaving Jon to languish in the basement Archives.

In hindsight, it's also a spiritual precursor to my vampire JE fics. Like. Same basic setup.

Huh.

(Believe it or not I'm actually even more of a freak about Jon NOW.)

Just to be clear, warning for:

Unhealthy relationships (I mean it's JE lmao)

Dubcon captivity?? I guess?? Like Jon agrees but Elias manipulates the scenario and Jon is. Not super happy about the situation.

Anyway the plotline is: Gertrude is missing (how mysterious and worrying!) and Elias needs himself a "temporary" Archivist to take care of the Archives until either she returns or until it becomes clear that he needs an official replacement. Jon is a very hardworking institute employee with a dedication to research and a knack for organization (autism requires everything be Sorted). Elias (who only wants to help Jon realize his full potential and has no ulterior motives whatsoever) decides that to promote him to the position. For career development reasons!

Jon:

Wants to prove that they are an asset to the institute and that they are up for the task.

Is hoping they can maybe be promoted to Head Archivist? Like Elias implied might happen if they did a good job?

Maybe. Possibly. Potentially. Fancies Elias a tiny bit.

Would appreciate the opportunity to do his own research on the statements there without their supervisor asking why they're so invested in statements involving Lietners and spiders.

Hypothetically wants Elias to praise them and validate them and respect them and profess his undying love for them make them employee of the month.

So. Obviously. They agree.

The thing is, it's only temporary, and Elias doesn't want to disrupt the other departments too much, you see, and surely Jon can handle a little tidying all by themselves? And obviously Jon can't say no to that! Haven't they always sort of wanted to not have to deal with annoying coworkers constantly chattering and bothering them and demanding their attention? Haven't they always wanted to work by themselves and be responsible for their own tasks? And Elias makes it sound like such an inconvenience to hire additional hands. Besides, Gerturde managed just fine without. Surely they can do this by themselves. Surely it will be fine.

It goes from there. The Archives are, obviously, a much bigger disaster than Elias had let on. But Elias expects Jon to handle it and handle it they shall. They just need to work harder. Come in early. Stay late. Miss lunch, sometimes. Work while they eat. It will be fine. What would Elias think if they asked for help? If they essentially admitted that they couldn't live up to his expectations? And other people would disrupt their ability to work. Might ask questions about any areas of interest they try to focus on.

They come in earlier and earlier. They stay later and later. Elias stops by occasionally to congratulate them on what a good job they're doing. To commend them on their dedication. So they have to keep it up. Can't slack off. They had friends before, sort of. Tim and Sasha were nice to talk to occasionally. But now Jon doesn't work near them, can't talk to them as much. Doesn't have time to get drinks with them after work, doesn't have the energy to answer their increasingly sporadic texts. Jon doesn't speak to much of anyone these days. It's fine though. It's fine it's fine it's fine.

There's something about the quiet stillness of the Archives. The echoing silence of the rest of the institute in those few moments Jon spends there in those long, lonely halls (not lifeless, per se, but lonely). There's some deep ache inside of them. It feels almost hollow, but it feels like home, too.

Elias is there, sometimes. To tell Jon how proud he is, how well they're doing. He likes to show up in the moments when Jon's thinking about leaving, maybe to eat in the cafeteria, maybe to stop by Sasha's desk... but that's probably paranoia. How would he know?

Every night, it feels so difficult to leave. Every night, Jon worries that Gertrude will come back and take the job from them, that Elias will find a replacement, that they'll lose their Archives. It's ridiculous, they know it, but it doesn't change the impulse to stay as long as possible. To prove to Elias that this is where they belong. It is an itch deep in their soul.

They think someone might be going through their desk. Something is watching them. It doesn't feel safe, leaving the Archives unattended over night.

(The Archives need an Archivist. The vacuum needs to be filled, and there is a perfect candidate right here, visiting them every day. Of course Jon is feeling the pull.)

And then it's been months, and Gertrude just hasn't been found, and Jon's done such a very good job, and it would be much easier if Jon would just... continue what they were doing? And if they think the work might be too much they can always ask for assistants, of course.

The itching in their soul soothes when they sign the contract. They try not to think about it.

Aaaaand that's about it as far as detailed plot goes. I do have some ideas for later on that are less well defined?

On the angstier side of things:

Things get easier when Jon is made Archivist officially. He feels more comfortable leaving at night, but he still spends a lot of time there. So many secrets, so little time.

He's paranoid. He knows something is up, that he might be in danger, that he's being watched... he can't involve anyone else. Not if he can't trust them, not if they might be in danger too.

Some of it is also the wearing effect of isolation. It's very easy to see other people as a threat or disturbance or unknown variable if you spend so much time alone.

He's looking into Gertrude's disappearance too. What did she know? What happened to her? Is he in danger too?

He can't trust Elias. He knows it. And it's so stupid that he's still maybe in love with him, just a bit.

Months pass. Relationships have surely withered and atrophied from Jon's absence. He still spends some time at his flat, but it's the Archives that feel like home.

And then, one night, the shadows in his flat come alive. Reaching ink-slick hands out to grasp him and pull him in.

It follows him. Shadows reaching with a dozen hungry hands as he races for the institute. Out of walls, street posts, parked cars. One catches on his side, and the flesh tears like paper.

It was midnight when he left. It was almost daybreak when he arrived at the Archives. He knows he's safe as soon as he crosses the threshold.

From there, I'm not sure what happens next. Tempted to say Elias was there waiting for him (I think the formatting maybe implies more continuity than there is there, how much Jon knows by the time he has to leave his flat behind is... debatable). Maybe Elias comes in to visit him and pretends to be shocked and worried about all the very unexpected blood. Maybe Jon has to phone him, begging for help because he can't go to the hospital (he knows it'll come back, the next time he's left alone in the dark), and really, who else does he have that will believe him?

Elias stays with him, tends to his injuries, spends his nights in the Archives with Jon. It's Jon who begs to stay in the Archives. Who needs the safety. The surety. Maybe Elias suggests that he stay there forever. Maybe he doesn't have to.

On the much goofier side of things: I do have an idea of them (once Jon is healed) going to Ikea to pick out some furniture. I'm thinking maybe Jon would know about the Eye, just for some fun bickering over picking out furniture or assembling a dresser or whatever. Idk, I just really like the idea of JE making the Archives into a cozy little home for Jon, somewhere he can comfortably live forever <3.

Jon has a lot of complicated feelings about the Archives and living in them and being the Archivist. Maybe he even tries to leave and go back to living a normal life. Maybe the reaching shadows break that idea for him forever. Either way, one way or another, he will learn that there is no point and there is no freedom in trying.

Despite this AU's beginnings, I don't know if Elias is working towards some big ritual. Maybe he just wants a perfect Archivist to keep in his basement forever.

And. I mean. Can you really blame him??

Not sure if JE ever become like. Official Romantic Partners. But Jon is Elias' Archivist and Elias is Jon's Watcher and that's kind of the same thing, really.

(Maybe they can have some sort of binding ritual ceremony at some point. As a Treat.)

Okay that's. God this has been a bit of a ramble, huh? Anyway I hoped you enjoyed hearing about this AU. I did get excited to take another crack at it while writing this! At the same time, however, I recently saw a post about Love that annoyed me a bit and which has made me think about the Subway Monster AU (and how those two concepts are connected is a WHOLE other story lmao) so we'll see which I end up doing (the answer might be neither for a while. I have. Big Graduation Responsibility due Oct. 1st). But yeah anyway thank you again for the ask! It was fun rambling, and actually really nice to sit down and Think about my AU lol.

#can i. can i get away with not putting this in the jon/elias tag??#please i'm so shy.#and this is so long and self indulgent.#anyway yeah #jon isolation au #man this is a fun one. i just want to put this guy in the isolation chamber!#i just want to take away all his friends until he has no one but him manipulative morally dubious crush!!#it's his natural habitat and he needs it #also fun fact this au is a he/they jon au #because Projection #but yeah. i think jon could work as an avatar of the lonely.#but he'd also be a perfect victim of it #(which is one of the reasons i love jon/peter so much btw)#i didn't really get as much into the captivity aspect as planned. and tbh i'm not sure how much it counts?#but basically elias' plan was:#make jon unofficial head archivist. let the institute's need for an archivist pull him in.#step in when he tries to reaffirm what few threadbare connections he has but do so subtly.#become his only remaining connection.#through both words and actions create the expectation that jon can manage the archives on his own.#heavily imply disappointment in the slowed progress if jon goes too many days in a row entering and exiting at a reasonable hour.#get him used to coming in too early and leaving too late to see anyone #wait until he is totally cut off from others. until you can be sure he would not ask for assistants. before officially promoting him.#he has to choose isolation. he has to choose the decay of his relationships. he has to choose loneliness. he has to choose the Archives #eventually when he moves in everyone will assume the reclusive antisocial workaholic is being a reclusive antisocial workaholic #and that's why they never see him anymore.#almost nobody has any reason to enter the archives if they aren't a statement giver and jon HATES being disturbed.#so they learn not to bother him. eventually he will stop being a person #he will be a distant figure. a rumor. forgotten except for lunchtime chatter and spooky stories at the pub after work.#he will only truly exist to elias.#and that's how you kidnap an archivist to be marked 14 times.

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sportsthoughts · 7 months ago

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thanks to all who have sent me awesome podcast and book recommendations etc. my next question is this - what is your all time favourite, must read hockey fic rec? I'm keen for any pairing, any team.

#seriously you guys are the best! so many great ideas and interesting things!!!#hockey rpf #also feel free to self promote! I need to stop rereading the same 6 fics over and over on a rotation #can actually also not be hockey tbh because I am quite open with the fic I read

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smile-files · 12 days ago

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this might be a hot take... but if you care about disavowing media made by bad people out of fear of looking like a bad person yourself more than you care about actually doing good things... you might have your priorities (and your morals) screwed up a bit :/

(see my tags for more of my thoughts on this topic! please try to avoid making make bad-faith assumptions about what i mean!)

#melonposting #there is a good case for not wanting to associate with something on account of the creator being harmful. sure whatever #but people have talked at length about the sort of moral ocd that it promotes when that idea is fervently preached and enforced #i don't know about you but i think there's a big difference between #a) not wanting people to associate with something because the media itself spouts harmful rhetoric #and because its bigoted creator both benefits from people engaging with the books and is idolized by many of the books' fans #and b) not wanting people to vocally enjoy ANYTHING made by ANYONE who's held any harmful ideology at any point #because doing so 'inherently' supports and spreads those harmful ideologies #it's true that you cannot separate the art from the artist #but good people can make bad art and bad people can make good art. artistic talent is not inherently correlated with the artist's morals #the goodness/badness of a person CAN seep into the art they make. and it often does. and that can affect one's enjoyment of it #but even then there's nuance to be had on how to deal with it #like my hero academia for example. when i started watching it in middle school i didn't know how misogynistic it would be #of course i ended up seeing it in the show (and god it's so misogynistic)#and i ended up learning that the 'joke' sexual-harasser character is a self-insert for the creator #which of course i could never get behind. the creator is undeniably a horrible guy #at the same time though the show means a lot to me and i've gained a lot from watching it #i won't elaborate here on how but believe me it isn't superficial. if you want to ask me about it i'd be happy to share #i can hold both in my mind. the disgust and the enjoyment. i don't think those have to be mutually exclusive #of course not everyone is like that; you could immediately stop liking the show on discovering the gross stuff. and that's your prerogative #i don't know... i agree with the values behind avoiding media made by people known to have moral failings #and in some cases (like harry potter and jkr) i fully endorse the values and the practice. but such cases are very specific #but in most cases i fear the practice is misguided and unnuanced and ultimately unhelpful in fulfilling one's values #it is largely a philosophical matter: about how an individual regards their moral standing in the context of themselves and other people #which is important to discuss - especially in our globalized internet age! speaking of which feel free to disagree with me #if you want to have a civil discussion i'm more than open to it #but no matter how important this matter... there are way more important ones in the world. especially right now #calling out people who watch a youtuber who said something bigoted 5 years ago does little to stop that bigotry overall #just have good morals and practice them! support oppressed people! be thoughtful and understanding and compassionate!#callouts and dni lists rarely make for impactful advocacy!!!

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cloverpurr · 2 years ago

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GOOD LORD YOU GUYS REALLY LIKED THE FIRESTAR DRAWING HUH

#warrior cats #....... YOU CAN STOP GIVING IT NOTES NOW PLASE IT TOOK ME LIKE 10 SECONDS TO DRAW IN MS PAINT #KJLAJLKASJLKJLKG #ive never gotten this many notes on a post IT HAS 500+ NOTES. HELLO???????????#ONE OF THE TAGS SOMEONE REBLOGGED IT WITH WAS 'sent to me"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#ND THAT MADE ME GO <:O BC LIKE WOAH. SOMEONE LIKED MY DINKY FIRESTAR DRAWING SO MUCH THEY SENT IT #TO THEIR FRIEND. HOW AMazing is that #peace and love on earth i love it here i love this fandom LKALKAJLKSG #...would you guys be mad if i reblogged the post with a shameless self promotion for like my actual art #AJKSALKJLKJG #kasper meows

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crystaleevee4 · 8 months ago

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i am going to start a collection

if you have any other posts of this kind please send them to me

update: this one thanks to @iputmcytsintohydraulicpress (great url, by the way)

this one courtesy of @catamaurrr-star

So I didn’t want to separate it into two images, this was the best I could do- thanks to @blocky-tides! also art is by @/cheeryfairies

thanks @o0recipme0o

hey @igotthisaccountunderduress. less mcyt related but thanks anyways :D

heheh

found another one from my favorite game in stars and time go play it

WE'VE GOT A BIG ONE TO ADD TO THE LIST TODAY. EVERYONE SAY HI XKCD. it's my favorite guy ever... skizzleman mention!

...so anyways here's my self-promotion now that this has almost 15,000 notes and you guys sure as hell won't see it if i reblog

My AO3! Not much there right now besides OC stuff, but more to come!

Situations ask game! pleasepleaseplease send me hc/life series stuff here i need enrichment (some of these are shorter, but i can promise you i will deliver!)

@traffic-smp-headcannons! me and mod tides like seeing your ideas :)

(of note: i also take art requests, but only traditional)

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rubydubydoo122 · 9 months ago

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Guys, check out ‘the ghost that live outside the grave’ which is a de-aged Jason fic

and ‘in every universe; still I rise’ which is Jason, Dick and Bruce traveling to different universe where Jason died

And fuck, while you’re at it, check out ‘the War within me’ which is Jason angst with Bruce after Gotham Wars

While we're on the topic of De-aging AU's I wanna talk about Jason and Damian if Jason was 14 again real quick.

Do you guys think that Damian looks at this version of Jason, so different from the version he knows, nothing like the person he was told Jason was, and feels uncomfortably seen?

Damian was always told that Jason died because he was reckless, because he disobeyed orders, he was fired as Robin and he got himself killed. A cautionary tale, not a threat to his position. He dismisses Jason because Bruce does, because Dick does, because sometimes even Babs and Alfred do.

That's not the kid that he's looking at now. This Jason is happy, and smart, and full of love that has not yet soured into grief. He hangs on Bruce's every word, trains until his hands bleed and his body gives out to perfect the moves Bruce teaches him. He looks at Bruce with stars in his eyes and he calls him dad.

And Damian can't help but think, that this is the perfect Robin. The perfect son. And if Jason - sweet, loving, strong, Jason - can be fired, can die and have his room locked away and his pictures torn down, can have his last memory as Robin be as A Good Soldier, how could the rest of them ever compete? What could Damian do to stand a chance?

Jason will never grow out of the shadow of Robin, like the rest of them did. As long as Bruce, and Dick, and Babs, and Alfred look at him and see a dead kid who came back wrong, he will never get to be anything else. He will not get to be looked at through who he is now without the shadow of a dead boy looming over him.

And the worst part? Jason is exactly the same person he was back then. Bitter, sure, angry, justifiably, but he is still the boy with too much love in his heart and righteous fury festering in his gut. He is exactly the same boy who threw himself in front of an explosion to save his mother.

(The lines between the mother that betrayed him and the father that disgraced him are so very blurred. Fire or blade or crowbars or fists it does not matter. It ends the same way it always does because Jason Todd always dies, in every universe, in every timeline, Jason dies and crawls out only to be killed again and again and again.)

#this is shameless self promotion #but somehow op subtly mentioned all the fics I have written #so I feel like I have to #dc #jason todd #damian wayne #de aging #i personally am obsessed with the headcanon that they met in the league which lends it's own sense of tragedy #but this is a more canon take on it #bruce wayne critical #do you guys think he watched jason fall back into old routines and is so unbelievably angry because none of it matters #do you think he listens to jason talk about homework and his grades and his clubs and the colleges he wants to go to #and all he can think of is how unfair it is

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