#This is the source of me hating my writing btw
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Yes yes yes to all of this. As a person who is very weird but neurotypical (at least to my knowledge) it's honestly sad to me how literally any character who is just the slightest bit weird gets labelled as "neurodivergent". On one hand yes, it's great for neurodivergent people to have their representation and see themselves on the screen, good for them! We need stories about characters with autism and ADHD - but we don't need every story to be about them. Cause on the other hand, no one sees how it's alienating them even more and how hurtful it is to weird neurotypical people. Right now every character I can identify with (Maya Fey, Perry, Lilo, Mabel, Newt Scamander, the list goes on), every weird scrunkly blorbo is labeled as autistic and/or ADHD not because they show the characteristic traits of neurodivergent people but because they're different. And what it tells me and others like me is:
You have no right to be different in this world unless you have a diagnosis.
Which is an awful message to send. It hurts. It makes one feel bad about being themself as if they didn't deserve it. It makes one wish they were autistic to be able to be themself. It perpetuates desperate need to conform to "being normal" (which is something that doesn't exist actually) and that's not something we want, is it? Don't we have enough harm with social media influencers, ever-present beauty standards, and the constant disappointment from our elders? Do we really need more stomping on originality and uniqueness in the world?
And might I add, the same goes for "transgender-coded" characters. If a girl doesn't wear make up, acts like a little gremlin, and/or is buff and plays a lot of sports, she's either lesbian, trans, or both. Whatever happened to "just a girl who is different"? The same goes for guys of course. How did we go from saying you're not feminine/masculine unless you fulfill a stereotype to saying you're not a woman/a man unless you fulfill a stereotype?! It's so much worse!
and another thing.
if every character that has a unique characterization in their thought process, or fictional perspective, MUST BE âautisticâ or âneurodivergent-coded,â that character is no longer relatable to people who donïżœïżœïżœt self-diagnose, or identify with, or are not diagnosed with, autism or anything on the neurodivergent spectrum.
I mean honestly I see you guys out here telling me that Mulan is neurodivergent, that ROZ from the Wild Robot is neurodivergent and gee, so is Brightbill, that Hiccup is neurodivergent and Ariel is autistic.
Ariel. The âgirl next doorâ princess.
The whole point of characters, especially main characters, especially main characters in childrenâs media, is to be believable and relatable, on some level. If theyâre all âspecial brain-different,â theyâre only relatable to people who accept that label or are given that diagnosis.
AND. It does a huge disservice to the storytelling techniques.
A story is supposed to get under the mental guard of a person. Youâre supposed to take your hands off the âthoughtâ wheel and your feet off the âemotionâ pedals, and let the story drive your brain and heart to a new place. Or an old place you havenât been in a while, or were forgetting.
One of the best ways to do that is to create a character that, on the surface, seems special and unrelatable. Like a girl living in the Imperial Dynasty of China, or a literal non-human robot. You canât, on the surface, relate to them as easily, so you naturally start to think, âwhat would it be like to be seeing the world through these new eyes?â And then youâve given up the wheel and pedals of your mind to the movie. You find yourself relating to concepts like motherhood and protectiveness, which the robot character is experiencing, but youâre looking at those concepts through new eyes.
That is why the character is a robot. Not so that she can be an allegory for your âspecial-undefined-perspective-on-life which is sometimes called neurodivergence.â Sheâs not a robot for that reason. Sheâs a robot because a robot character flips the âwhat would it be like to learn everything over again?â switch in your brain, and then the story can show you itâs focus, (like motherhood and kindness in The Wild Robot) after the switch is flipped.
and itâs flipped for everybody, (âneurodivergentâ and âneurotypicalâ) not just people who identify as the vague term âneurodivergent,â or have been diagnosed as autistic. Stop fitting everything into vague-enough-to-be-claimed, but named-enough-to-be-a-special-identity boxes. Youâre ruining the universal, unifying value of it all.
#yup this will definitely get me internet hate bring it in#for so long i was confused whether i'm actually cis or not#and then i realized in my case it's stupid to ponder it anyway (in my case cause i know everyone's different)#neurodivergent#autism#btw i'm not saying it's not okay to HEADCANON characters are neurodivergent or trans or whatever#you can headcanon everything you want if it corresponds well with the source material!#if it doesn't you can make an au or write something ooc which is fine as well!#but saying one interpretation is the only correct one when it isn't is not good imo#adhd
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that moment you realize you lost a handful of followers after you stopped regularly posting fanfics lmao
#Sorta venty#Iâll delete in a bit like most of my other posts made this evening#But like#I donât ever pay attention to follower count#But the fact that I lost followers after I stopped posting fics (and started focusing on my own links) is hilarious#Like thanks! Nobody ever read those pieces of shit! And I got unfollowed when I stopped lmao#This is the source of me hating my writing btw#Gonna delete the fics list from my pinned post and redo that entirely tomorrow or something when I can think reasonably#But like. Iâve gotten more since then. So I think I am doing something right?#Idk I currently hate myself and I wanna cry
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(Staring at essay Iâve been trying to finish since 2pm)
#itâs 8 now#this interterm class is so fucking stupid she assigned two essays this week bc she couldnât bear to just. remove one#four week class btw and she has piled SO much work into it#and instead of having one final we basically have 2#a presentation WITH AUDIO NARRATION and 5 essays with sources as a written final#as in essays aside from the ones Iâve been writing. completely different prompts#I canât stand this college#it doesnât even matter getting this stupid degree doesnât mean anything#people with masters and doctorates work at coffee shops#the hell is a bachelors gonna do for me#the job market is a nightmare and the economy is just waiting to crash#and weâre about to have one of the most evil men alive running our country#thereâs no point Iâm so sick of this#you want me to go to school so Iâm distracted from it all#just donât be surprised when I get that piece of paper and am offered the exact same jobs I was offered beforehand#donât be surprised when Iâm still living at home into my 30s because everything is so expensive itâll make your eyes cross#sorry. for rambling in tags#my head hurts and I hate nothing like I hate being human#god why didnât you make me a bird#Iâll post a drawing or something eventually provided this winter storm doesnât knock our power out for a couple days#lol. lmao. :D#j.yammering
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THE OTHER GUY PT.6 | FC43
an: and we've reached the final part of the series! i hope you guys have enjoyed this as much as i have, it was very fun to write and i can't wait to write something soon :) remember my requests are always open!!
part one | part two | part three | part four | part five |
ynpiastri
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, landonorris and 30,382 others
spain, i'll miss you đ„Č
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userone: spain yn was my fav yn
usertwo: is that franco? đ
userthree: it's probably oscar or logan
oscarpiastri: i have an idea, i pay you to stay in spain for the rest of your life and you never come to the track again
logansargeant: i need her there, you're not a reliable source of gossip
ynpiastri: if you don't invite me, i have other ways of being there
userfour: franco? đ
userfive: your honour i love them
lilyznimer: can't wait to see you again
ynpiastri: @/oscarpiastri HA SHE LOVES ME MORE THAN YOU đčđ«”đčđ«”
usersix: yn, we're all here for franco confirmation. give it to us.
twitter
francolapinto
liked by alex_albon, williamsracing, ynpiastri and 985,352 others
back to work, i hate this country đ§ïž
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alex_albon: next time take me to spain too
francolapinto: yes boss
userone: no yn confirmation âčïžâčïž
williamsracing: franco...
francolapinto: no amount of media training will make me lie about this country
usertwo: where's yn?
userthree: we want to see FRANYN!
userfour: she's in his likes. im connecting dots.
userfive: stop being delusional, you ain't connecting shit.
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ynpiastri
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, francolapinto and 29,453 others
me when i remember that i actually have a big girl job and living off of oscar's money in his spare room isn't actually what i do with my life.
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userone: wife
usertwo: she has a job?? i thought she just went to gp's with oscar
ynpiastri: SHE has a masters in engineering design and technology đ
userthree: cleared
oscarpiastri: move out please
ynpiastri: no đ
userfour: still no franco
userfive: girl they both have full time jobs
usersix: MOTHERRRRR
logansargeant: you're a psycho for bringing your laptop to the beach btw
ynpiastri: i don't think i asked for your opinion, hope that helps lo! đ
interview with franco colapinto
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ynpiastri
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, mclarenracing and 31,439 others
supporting my favourite mclaren driver (not oscar)
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userone: I WANT TO BE HER
usertwo: I WANT HER
oscarpiastri: funny joke
logansargeant: or is it..đ
userthree: imagine living her life
landonorris: i thought your favourite driver didn't race for mclaren [this comment has been deleted]
userfour: she's so pretty
userfive: still no sign of franyn
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francolaptino
liked by williamsracing, alex_albon, ynpiastri and 924,235 others
the only women in my life btw (not that anyone asked)
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userone: ohđ
usertwo: i don't believe it
alex_albon: this guy
userthree: he's so unintentionally funny
williamsracing: how cute
imessage between logan and yn
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twitter
ynpiastri
argentina
liked by oscarpiastri, logansargeant, francolapinto and 31,435 others
would rather date traffic cone (holiday dump coming soon x)
*comments have been turned off*
offseason 2024
The golden Argentinan sun hung low in the sky, casting a warm, amber glow across the quiet, coastal villa. His family home sat nestled on the edge of a cliff, overlooking the endless blue stretch of sea. The scent of saltwater drifted in on the breeze, mingling with the fragrant citrus trees that lined the garden.
You and Franco sat on a cushioned wicker sofa in the sunroom, the wide-open windows framing the breathtaking view. The room had a rustic charmâwhitewashed walls, terracotta tiles, and soft, earth-toned furniture. His arm was draped lazily around your shoulders, pulling you close as you both idly scrolled through your phones, the sounds of crashing waves and distant seagulls filling the peaceful silence.
But neither of you were really focused on the phones. The fan speculations and social media drama had become a background humâamusing, but distant. For months now, youâd both kept this secret relationship hidden, playing the game of cat-and-mouse with the public, teasing and trolling them into thinking you were still enemies.
âDo they really still think I hate you?â you muttered, your lips curving into an incredulous smile as you glanced at a fan comment. âIâve done too good a job convincing them.â
He chuckled, his voice low and smooth as he leaned in closer to peek at your screen. âWell, you have been pretty savage online. You didnât hold back with that last post, hermosa.â
Your eyes flicked up to meet his, playful. âSays the guy who told the press Iâd have to beg for a date. I never forgot that one.â
He grinned down at you, his light brown eyes twinkling with amusement. âI mean, to be fair, you did tweet that you wouldnât date me if I were the last man on earth.â
You rolled your eyes, nudging him with your elbow. âTouchĂ©.â
His laughter faded, replaced by a softer, more thoughtful expression. His fingers tracing slow, absent-minded circles on your arm, and his gaze shifts from the ocean outside back to you. The silence stretched out between you for a moment, and you could feel the weight of whatâs unspoken.
âWe canât keep this up forever, you know,â he finally said, his voice quieter now, more serious.
You paused for a second, his words catching you off guard. Youâd grown so used to the secrecy, to sneaking around and playing up the rivalry for the fans. It had become a game, but now, here in the warmth of his familyâs sunroom, with the sea breeze gently ruffling your hair, the reality of your relationship felt different. Realer. More solid.
You sat up a little straighter, turning to face him fully. âWhat are you saying?â
He met your eyes, his lips curling into a small, meaningful smile. âMaybe itâs time we tell everyone. Stop pretending.â
Your heart skipped a beat. The thought of going public, of finally letting the world see whatâs been building between you, sent a thrill through you. But it was also terrifying. What would people say? How would the fans react? Youâve been holding onto this secret for so long, the thought of exposing it felt almost... vulnerable.
Still, as you sat there with him, in this secluded little bubble away from the world, the idea didn't seem so scary anymore. It felt exciting. Liberating.
A slow, playful grin spread across your face. âIf weâre going to do this, we have to do it in the most ridiculous, out-of-pocket way possible.â
He raised an eyebrow, intrigued. âLike what?â
You leaned back against the sofa, the sunlight warming your skin as the wheels in your head begin to turn. âSomething so cheesy and over-the-top that people wonât even know if weâre serious or still trolling them.â
His lips quirked into a smirk, rubbing his chin as if considering it. âWhat, like one of those cringey TikTok couple challenges?â
You nodded eagerly. âExactly. The kind of stuff that makes people cringe, but they canât look away.â
He let out a low chuckle, clearly warming up to the idea. âYou mean the ones where people do those obnoxiously cute couple things, like finishing each otherâs sentences?â
You grin. âExactly. Go so hard that no one can tell if weâre serious.â
He leans forward, grabbing his phone from the coffee table. âI like it. Letâs do it.â
You blink, a little surprised at how quickly heâs jumping on board. âWait, right now?â
He shrugs, that familiar mischievous glint in his eyes. âWhy not? Weâve kept this quiet long enough. Letâs have some fun.â
Your pulse quickened with a mixture of excitement and nerves as you both adjusted your positions on the sofa, sitting up a little straighter, leaning in close to each other. His arm slid around your waist, pulling you just a little closer, and you could feel the warmth of his body against yours. The soft hum of the waves and the distant calls of seagulls faded into the background as the moment intensified.
âAlright,â you said, barely keeping a straight face, âletâs do this.â
He raised his phone, the camera pointed at both of you, and the screen lights up, casting a soft glow on your faces. âFirst question,â you began, doing your best over-the-top rom-com voice. âWho said âI love youâ first?â
He smirked, nudging you playfully. âEasy. You did.â
You gasped dramatically, placing a hand over your heart. âI did not! That was totally you.â
The playful banter flowed easily, the chemistry between you undeniable. The air between you crackled with tension, but the laughter kept things light. Each question grows sillier than the last, your teasing jabs masking the real emotions simmering beneath the surface.
As the game continued, the joking faded. The answers become more meaningful, more intimate. He reached out and takes your hand, his thumb brushing over your knuckles, and the teasing spark in his eyes shifted into something softer.
Then, as if the playful mood couldnât hold any longer, he lowered his phone and set it down on the coffee table, turning to face you fully. His gaze was intense, his eyes locking with yours in the fading sunlight. âMaybe we should stop messing around and just... tell them.â
Your breath caught in your throat. âFor real?â
He nodded, his voice a little quieter, a little rougher. âYeah. Iâm tired of hiding. I want people to know.â
You hesitated for a second, the weight of the official decision settling in. But then, a surge of boldness rose within you. âOkay. Letâs do it. But firstââ You held up your phone, turning off notifications before tossing it onto the sofa. âI donât want to deal with the chaos immediately.â
He chuckled, grabbing his phone, posting the video and then,following your lead and shutting off his phone. âSmart. Weâll get spammed for sure.â
Once the phones were off and forgotten, you exchanged a glance, and then both of you dissolved into laughter, the weight of secrecy lifting off your shoulders. The relief, the excitementâit was overwhelming in the best way.
As the laughter died down, the air between you shifted slightly, becoming heavier, charged with something far more intense than before. His eyes darkened as they traced the curve of your lips, and your breath hitches, feeling the pull between you like a magnetic force. Neither of you speak for a long moment, the silence thick with unspoken desire.
Without warning, he leaned in, his hand sliding up to cup the side of your face, his thumb brushing tenderly along your cheek. The touch sent a shiver down your spine, and your heart pounded in your chest, anticipation crackling in the air around you. He was so close now that you could feel the heat radiating off his skin, the scent of his cologne mixing with the salty sea air.
Your pulse quickened as his gaze locked with yours, and for a second, time seemed to stop. Then, he closed the gap, capturing your lips in a kiss that was slow and deliberate, yet filled with an undeniable hunger. His lips were soft but firm, moving against yours with a heat that left you breathless.
You responded immediately, your hands gripping the fabric of his shirt as you pulled him closer, needing more. His kiss deepened, and the intensity built. The taste of him is intoxicating, like you had both been waiting for this moment for far too long. His other hand snaked around your waist, pulling you flush against his chest, and you could feel the strength of his body against yours.
The kiss grew more urgent, your bodies pressed together as if the space between you was unbearable. His fingers threaded through your hair, holding you in place as he kissed you harder, deeper, like he couldn't get enough. You lost yourself in the sensationâthe way his lips devoured yours, the heat of his breath mingling with yours, the low, barely audible groan that escaped from deep in his chest.
As you kissed him back with equal fervor, your entire body tingled, your senses overwhelmed by himâthe way his hands gripped your waist, the way his lips tease and explore yours.
When he finally pulled back, his forehead resting against yours, both of you were panting, your hearts racing in sync. His eyes, dark and full of desire, met yours, and a slow, satisfied smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.
âGuess I can do that more often now,â he murmured, his voice husky and low.
You smiled back, your lips still tingling from the kiss. âWith my brother in that same paddock? Not a chance?â
francolapinto and ynpiastri
liked by logansargeant, schecoperez, oscarpiastri and 984,348 others
it wasn't a joke btw
*limited comments only*
williamsracing: franco...
oscarpiastri: that's my sister pal
francolaptino: oops?
logansargeant: this hurt more than my replacement
ynpiastri: shut up?
logansargeant: yes ma'am
the end.
taglist: @iimplicitt @isaadore @iamred-iamyellow @justheretoreadthxxs @obxstiles @how-what-why-huh @raizelchrysanderoctavius @sainzzreputaticn @xxx-betty @dukeofjjune @dejavuontrack @littlegrapejuice @mxdi0 @st4rgirl-ellie @dullypully @cinderellawithashoe
#f1#f1 imagine#f1 smau#f1 fanfic#logan sargeant#williams#franco colapinto#franco colapinto x reader#franco colapinto x you#franco colapinto x yn#oscar piastri#oscar piastri sister#williams f1#williams racing#williams formula 1#logan sargeant angst#logan sargeant smau#f1 social media au#franco colapinto smau
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I want to write something sort of meta, hear me out on it. Sorry, if this hits too close to home. The idea came to me and I needed to get it out of my system. And...would you look at that, another half-written fic.
Steve ends up getting really into Star Wars after Dustin shows him to it. Like, so much that he gets himself involved with conventions, cosplay, collecting anything and everything he can. He's involved in a fandom space. Learns the world of fan fiction. And let's say that maybe, during his time figuring out where he wants to go with life, he picks up writing fanfic as a hobby.
It encourages him to get an English degree. Encourages him to lean more into that hobby, but then expanding upon it to write original short stories and small novels that go published. But he holds strong to Star Wars and fandom and finding his spot cemented in it. He's been a fan for...nearly forty years at this point (set in 2024, ugh I know).
And maybe he dabbles in online spaces here and there. He ignores the insufferable adults in the Star Wars fandom (the "um, actually..." guys, btw). Indulges the effort of typing out his handwritten fan fiction, ones he used to bring and pass around at conventions, ones he'd let Eddie read with a shy look in his eyes. And he posts them online, has a Tumblr account, maybe does a few short things on Twitter, definitely is on AO3 (albeit newer, having never attempted online fan work before).
But then...then he gets his first little bit of hate. Vicious, gross comments on his work. Sometimes in private messages. Even publicly, once, on Twitter. It irks him. He holds strong, he does. But then it gets worse and worse and somehow, worse. Younger people claiming he's too old, others claiming that he can't write for certain characters because they're out of his age range, that he can't ship certain people, he can't say that a character would do this or that, that Star Wars is media for a younger audience (despite being somebody who saw it "back in the day"). But that he...That he's not supposed to be there.
And that last little comment sticks with him for a long time. It makes his effort and his attention and his love for writing fanworks falter. He stops. Thinks about the characters he loves, of Leia and Han or even Luke and Han or Lando and Han (listen he loves writing Han). But then he wonders if it's even worth it, to indulge this interest anymore. Yeah, maybe he's older than the source material. Sure, maybe he was introduced to it a little later than most, but that doesn't mean he doesn't love it. Yet, his attention towards Star Wars completely falls away.
He stops watching it. His DVDs going dusty and unused. Starts putting away all his action figures, because what if he posts a photo one day and somebody sees them and claims that that's not for him andâ
Then, he goes completely offline from fandom. Even if he still gets the emails from users who actually enjoy his stuff, ignoring them completely. Focuses on using the internet for work. For his novels, for the little stories he actually gets paid to write. But his work just isn't the same. The passion, despite being an original story and original source material, is completely dwindled.
His hobby has been stripped from him. His interest has been knocked straight out of his hands. And he just...moves on.
Even if it hurts to go down into the basement of he and Eddie's home, eyes catching on the see-through bins of original action figures, Lego sets, comic books. Even if it makes something strangle in his chest when he opens up the browser on his phone and it immediately opens to a new ship he'd been getting into: Din Djarin/Luke Skywalkerâbecause he finally picked up The Mandalorian, because he was finally talked into watching it when he had the free time.
And then it all bursts over when Eddie finally approaches him about it, when they're enjoying a night-in, sitting around lazily on their sofa.
"There's a convention coming into town," he comments, "supposedly, Hayden Christensen is going to be there. We should go, try and meet him."
Steve just grunts in response.
"Oh-kay...or we could just stay home and watch the movie?" Eddie suggests. "Been a while since I've seen Darth on screen, telling Luke about"â
"I don't want to," Steve cuts in quietly, "isn't really my thing anymore."
Silence then follows. For a beat. Then two. A third.
"Not your thing?" Eddie asks him incredulously. "Not too long ago you were raving all about that new show that's coming out! That you saw they were doing lightsaber whips and you were excited to see how they worked! What do you mean it's 'not your thing'?"
Steve shrugs. "Grew out of it or whatever. Got more important things to focus on now." He sniffs, trying to keep himself held together, grumpy and firm in his decision.
Eddie's stare drills into the side of his face. Scalding, just like that lava was in Revenge of The Sith. "Baby," he speaks softly, "did something happen? You haven't even...you don't read your beautiful little stories to me anymore. In fact, now that I think about it, I haven't even seen your lightsabers around here. What's goin' on?"
He fiddles with the hem of his shirt. A ratty plain white t-shirt that he wears now when he's lounging around the house. It used to be one with the Millennium Falcon on it, but that's tucked down far in his dresser. Not for him anymore.
"Steve," Eddie presses, "did something happen?"
His stare stays down at his lap, still fiddling with his shirt. Fingers flexing unfamiliarly in the strings, unlike the loose ones on his Star Wars shirts. "I just"âSteve heaves a deep sighâ"it's time I grow up. It's...not for me anymore. Too old for it now, I guess."
"You guess or you know? Because nobody's too old for anything. Unless, y'know, you're like eighty-nine and in terrible health and trying to hike Everest, then..."
Despite everything, Steve finds himself chuckling. A giddy little sound here and gone in a breath. He shrugs again, albeit smaller this time. Crumbling within himself. Quietly, honestly, he admits, "People were being mean to me about it online. About my writing. That I'm doing it wrong, that Iâthat I'm too old for it. That I don't belong because of my age." He finally brings himself to look at Eddie, blearily because his eyes are aching and wet. "I got to thinking and I...maybe I've just been too caught up in my own bliss to realize that those people are right. They're right and I shouldn't be into kids stuff anymore."
Eddie makes a soft, sad cooing noise in the back of his throat. "Oh, baby," he breathes. "Baby, those people don't know a single damn thing about your love. But...but I do. I know that you've seen every single Star Wars movie more times than I've probably eaten in my entire life. And what about all those Halloween costumes over the years? I didn't dress up like Leia for nothing, Mr. Solo."
Steve scoffs wetly. Goes to protest, butâ
"And...and that handshake! The one with Dustin? You guys have had that for nearly forty fucking years! So, why bother indulging any of these...these hardasses on the internet? Did they sit next to you on the sofa as you fucking curled yourself like a shrimp and wrote every little intricate detail of a kiss between Luke and Han? Have they read your work while you blushed all shy, while you tucked your hair behind your ear and asked for the most earnest of feedback, to make sure you spelt things correctly or put a comma in the right place? These people, did they get to see you blossom and grow like a fucking bushel of roses over your hobby?
"Because I know I did. And even though you were nervous about your words on the paper, you still came to me. You still wrote and wrote and wrote until I had to bully you into breaks, just so you wouldn't ruin your poor wrists. If they had even an ounce of the passion that you do, they could write their own stories. They can make their own endings and make the characters the way they imagine them.
"They choose, instead, toâwhatâmake fun of you because you have a space to express yourself? Because you found passion and turned it into something so beautiful, even Iâa dungeon master, someone supposed to be amazing at storytellingâcan't put into words? You found a way to do that, Steve. And you do that with kindness. You do it for free, mind you. If their only passion sits within sending you vitriol over people who aren't even remotely close to real, then they're the ones who don't belong.
"If I've learned anything, fandom is a space to share and bounce off each other's words. It's community and it's belonging and it's sharing what you love because you just love it. Fandom isn't bullying. Bullying is just bullying, Steve.
"And everything you've ever done in your life, in regards to fandom and outside of it, is so much better than hate. You may be a nerd or...or a little bit overzealous or whatever, but at least you aren't hateful. I think being hateful, that's worseâdon't you think?"
Steve can only stare in response, fast tears down his cheeks, hands shaking in his shirt. Mind reeling. Because, yes, Eddie's right. And he maybe should've talked about it initially, but the hurt festered and festered and tangled and grew until he was nothing but an unhealed scab. And Eddie, he's the antiseptic to his uncovered cutsâthe ones deep on his heart, where all his love isâeven for things considered mundane, like movies, like TV shows.
"Steve," Eddie carefully murmurs, wrapping Steve's hands with his own, "you don't have to do something right to love it. You don't have to be a certain way to be happy. If Star Wars made you happy, then why give it up?"
He sniffles and chokes back on a sob. Because, againâdamnitâEddie's right. "I miss it," he admits quietly, "all I've done is miss it."
Eddie gives him a small smile. Something achingly soft that reaches deep within Steve. "Then open your arms and welcome it back, baby," he whispers, "even if you can't be online anymore, do it for yourself."
"I...I want to try it again, I'm just...scared. What if people hate it all over again? What if they're just nasty to me and shut me down and push me to the side and"â
"But what if they love it? What if your readers have missed you just as much?"
"You think?" he meekly asks.
Eddie's eyes widen and his eyebrows shoot up his forehead. "I know, actually. Your emails keep coming in on the computer's desktop because I keep forgetting to log you out. And, baby, you would not believe how many people have been eager for updates, for your return." His thumbs work into the backs of Steve's hands, warm and sure. "And, if it helps, maybe I can moderate your comments before you look at 'em? I'll read them to myself and if they're mean, I'll delete them."
Steve blows out a breathy little chuckle. "You'll just get mad at them," he gently teases. "But that doesn't sound too bad. Maybe I should try again. Not yet, though. I'm not ready."
"That's okay," Eddie assures, "take things slow. Maybe we start with watching the movies again? Getting your lightsabers back on display?"
"Can we go to the convention, too?"
"We can do whatever you want, Stevie."
For the first time in a long while, Steve finds himself smiling. "I love you," he whispers.
"I know."
#stranger things#steddie#steve harrington#eddie munson#future fic#modern day#Steve gets involved in a fandom space#established steddie
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I finished Veilguard btw so here's my long thoughts (be warned I've been writing notes during my entire playthrough so this is very long) for folks who want it:
My favorite parts of DAV:
Best level design in any DA so far. The platforming grew on me, and I think the levels were well-thought out and mostly fun to navigate. Arlathan Forest was exhausting but other areas felt nicely balanced with branching paths, hidden rooms, etc. Exploration in smaller contained maps done right imo.
Mage combat is really satisfying at higher levels. Pure ranged combat is totally impossible unless you have Davrin and Taash popping taunts back to back, but dropping a massive AOE while fighting close-range feels good too.
Being able to auto-equip and compare new gear is great.
Same with the codex entries. Not having to hunt down whatever note I just picked up is a huge improvement.
Upgrading equipment via duplicates incentivized treasure chest hunting, which I would have otherwise skipped lol. It really helped me slow down and take time exploring areas, and I appreciated that.
The final act didn't make the previous 70+ hours feel better, my fault for spoiling most of it for myself, but it was neat. Cool set pieces, cool fights. I was worried Elgar'nan was gonna have the same moveset as the Regrets, but his final battle was great.
Oh, I forgot Felassan! His notes were a tragic delight. Such a good man. Funny too. They didn't need to kill Varric to make Solas less sympathetic...I think Felassan's betrayal(s) serve that purpose well already.
Rook & Their Faction:
Without rehashing what I've said over the past few weeks: this is my least favorite protagonist.
Being a funny and sarcastic and irreverent hero in a DA game is not new. Not having a choice in the matter is. The Inquisitor was pretty fixed in their tone too (cant even choose a personality for them in CC) but even they had better aggressive options available.
Folks say not to judge Rook's depth by a Lord of Fortune playthrough but since factions are asymmetrical on purpose here are my impressions:
The Lords of Fortune didn't contribute to my run in any meaningful way other than getting Emmrich hot which is not unique, as it turns out, to any particular background. In fact, learning Natalene was a galley slave as an aside detracted from my experience. Being a former galley slave, former Circle mage (again: Rivain doesn't have Circles), semi-Dalish city elf with DIY vallaslin is unreal. Especially as characters continuously imply Rook is a young 20-something. The fact this wasn't immediately caught and course-corrected shows -- to me -- how hectic and spread-thin DAV's development really was. :(
Story & Antagonists:
Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain have cackling witch disease. No motivations outside of power. That was a little disappointing. Was also hoping they'd at least comment on Rook/Davrin/Bellara's vallaslin but they're too busy plotting world domination to really notice. Love their designs though. I'd love to hear a deep dive on how they animated Ghil's tentacles.
Veilguard feels like an immediate follow-up to Trespasser, not the ten year timeskip it says it is. I wonder if that's a symptom of adapting the live service story (content that was likely meant to stretch, similar to Anthem and Destiny, over a decade) for single-player.
I miss the politically-motivated meddling. Every villain is allied with the Evanuris. We needed some that aren't. The Right and Left Hand of the Black Divine, corrupt brothers of the Imperial Chantry, the agents of the Archon, a Minrathous street gang, some Rivaini pirates, anything, anyone.
It's crazy how all elven resistance seemed to evaporate with the dissolution of the Dread Wolf Army. As much as I'd hate seeing them duped and betrayed by SolasâŠI prefer that to just pretending everything's fine now. I could easily see alienage elves and slaves take Cyrian's path, desperate for change no matter the source, especially since oppression is all they've known and there's no end to it in sight. Especially with their gods confirmed as the source of the blight. All downhill from here I fear.
The Butcher. Would. That voice and that frame....it purred I fear. But even he was not immune to cackling witch disease. Wish he stuck around longer for personal reasons. My South is under siege and I aint talking about Ferelden.
Combat:
I found myself switching builds a lot, which was nice and kept things fresh. That being said: DAV needed loadouts for skills and equipment and a menu showing active passive skills + enchantments. A QOL update for this stuff would have been amazing. I want to try an archer run, but I dread (đș) fussing with skill tree nodes again.
After fighting Mythal (my first full dragon fight) I was disappointed how all dragons share her same attack patterns. They didn't have to reinvent the wheel or anything -- this was the case with dragon battles in DAI and I thought it was fine -- but Mythal of all enemies should have been unique.
High-level demons are limited to Rage and Pride. High-level darkspawn are limited to Ogres. I miss those little scrungly lookin' despair demons and nasty ass hurlock emissaries. After 60 hours I did get a little tired of the same handful of mobs over and over.
Companions & NPCs:
The Veilguardians feel like my kids. Except Emmrich who's absolutely convinced he's in an age-gap relationship with my older lady Rook. It's not that they're uniquely dependent or rudderless, it's that their struggles are solved with nurturing pep talks. Reaffirm their worth, give them a hug, and all that inner turmoil is cancelled. Rich coming from the 'I should have been able to influence my companions more in DAI' girl, but Rook's impact on the Veilguard, the way their doubts vanish completely via some life coaching, feels off.
Speculation: I think the companions were originally planned to be NPCs. Their written banter in some of the notes, their verbal banter throughout the Lighthouse, they feel like they're meant to stay in the hub and act as quest-givers in the live service game. Especially with how Rook is excluded. That's fine btw it just helps explains some things. (Just remembered something else: when you talk to quest NPCs out in the world and the camera focuses in on the conversation, you can't see your companions. They chime in with disembodied voices, always hidden out of frame. That also gives me the feeling they were added later. Not confirmed btw just my hunch!)
Torn about Taash. I love them for breaking the 'agreeable companion' monotony but hate the ~animalistic race~ tropes they were saddled with. I've had issues with Weekes' handling of race and culture in the past. I'm disappointed to see it continue a decade later. I'll leave it there. Sten cannot smell ovulating coochie!
I tried to kill Lucanis during the final assault. Had full faction strength but I didn't complete his personal quest. It didn't work. Sorry Zevran!
Shathann's VA was acting her ass off. Great performance. Absolute bars from Taash's VA during their scenes too.
I dreaded (đș) opening the Lighthouse map to see who wanted to talk. I usually love chopping it up and getting to know my party; that's my favorite part of any DA game. But so many conversations were just spent restating the obvious (Bellara is worried about The Gods and her brother, Harding is worried about her powers and Solas, Davrin is worried about the griffons and Gloom Howler, you know like in case you forgot). Running person-to-person-to-person and feeling no sense of accomplishment or progress for it seriously drained me.
The Inquisitor⊠I assumed vowing to stop Solas would block my Lavellan from pining and questioning herself after a decade apart and two very clear rejections. She kept asking whether he could still be reasoned with even in the midst of the final operation. I'm disappointed how little that choice mattered in the end. The second-hand embarrassment was crazyyy.
Romance:
Now this part is a little unique. Sorry for what I'm about to say about Emmrich. If it helps: I found him the most fun of all the companions. He's handsome, thoughtful, and has a fascinating past. But I ended up being dissatisfied by the end, and not just because of being soft-locked into a May-December fling, cringe commentary from Rook, and feeling like I was straight-up harassing Emmrich in early flirting dialogue.
The main issue: I don't care for the Mourn Watch. I like the Mourn Watch characters, but the organization makes me crazy. We hear so little about how they function in the context of an Andrastian nation like Nevarra. Summoning the dead in a world that still believes souls join the Maker's side in the Fade is huge. I wanted to really dig into discussions on the afterlife but in the end I'm supposed to go 'waow cool skeletons' and forget that religion is such an important facet of Thedas. I was so bummed!
I made him a Lich because he didn't seem to care either way. Reuniting him with Manfred is morally good, turning him into an eternal protector of the Necropolis is morally good. Emmrich is happy with whatever, so I gave him whatever, and I said 'whatever' when it was all over. My god is that man cute, but the romance overall just didn't do it for me.
Should've known when I saw his rotunda lol Bioware you sly dogs you got me again!
Personal final thoughts:
Well? I don't think I'm sad anymore, but I am left with complicated feelings. Obviously things are a little different for me being an EA Partner and getting an idea of just how much work has gone into making the game exist period. And I think because I can't blame it all on one person, shit all over it, and move on that these feelings are just kinda churning with nowhere to go.
Things could have been handled better. Didn't like the attempt to hide the world states until launch, or the dismissive comments from writers about it. Didn't like the AMA answers. And this isn't really my business but I'll say it anyway: I feel like the community council was thrown to the wolves, having to base their DA4 impressions around the sliver of content they were allowed to see, and having a much more hands-off role than implied.
I hope DAV is taken as an opportunity to refocus, double-down on what makes Dragon Age so beloved, and lean into those strengths unapologetically. Easier said than done -- as much as I loved Swen's speech about creating games free of marketing expectations and mimicking the latest trends that's often times impossible -- but I want to believe it can be done in this case.
Anyway both Sabine & my antibiotics are complete and I'm overcoming my moodiness and getting back to work on commissions! I've cured the Blight in more ways than one! đ
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BAD IDEA RIGHT?
PAIRING lee juyeon x f!reader
WORD COUNT 4.10k
GENRES ⊠smut
WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT, literally porn with plot. like iâm so insane, enemies to âwe fuckinâ as reese put it đ„°, frat boy tbz again!!!, juyo is literally so irritating in the first half im not even gonna lie, heâs also a manwhore, making out, reader is a bit of a brat, juyeon has a dirty mouth, kinda dom!juyeon, vaginal fingering, oral (m! receiving), SHOWER SEX !12!1!, heâs hitting it from the back btw, unprotected sex, creampie, juyeon is actually⊠i donât even know how to describe him writing his character made me want to claw at the walls lol
SUMMARY deep down youâre fully aware that youâre probably making a huge mistake by giving into juyeon just like every other girl on campus ever has. but paired with how intoxicating his mouth feels on your own and the steam filled bathroom clouding your head, you canât seem to find a logical reason to stop.
MORE heheheh im back đ€ oh my god this was actually the cause of a week full of sleepless nights. i genuinely drove myself crazy writing this bc NEED FRRRR like idk iâm so đ delusional. ANYWAYS. ANON. THIS ONE IS FOR U. U REQUESTED THIS AND I RAN WITH IT. u wanted more juyeon, i deliver more juyeon ;) also shout out to ally, moni, AND reese for betaâing đ„ș i love u my cupcakes!! prompt used: 18 <3
PERM TAGLIST @winterchimez @maessseongs @itsbeeble
If there was anyone on Earth that you hated more than anything, it had to be Lee Juyeon.
To put things plainly, he was quite literally the bane of your existence. Being around him made your blood pressure skyrocket and gave you migraines that lasted for days. It was insane how one person could affect you so much by doing so little. It seemed as if he thrived off of getting under your skin.
Considering he was the captain and the pitcher of the baseball team, it wasnât shocking. He was also a member of one of the most popular fraternities on campus. But he happened to be roommates with one of your best friends, and that made it ten times worse.
Youâd known Changmin since third grade, along with Kevin and Chanhee. When he mentioned heâd be joining a fraternity in college, you were a bit apprehensive. All you knew about them was what youâd read in YA books and seen in movies. Neither gave them a good rep. Part of you wanted to talk him out of it, but you knew this was something you had to let him do, given you were adults and it was his college experience. At least you still had the other two under one roof.
The first time you met Juyeon was also the first time you attended a frat party. Changmin had just passed his initiation after waiting a year and he invited all of you to celebrate. You were excited for the most part since high school parties were more for an adrenaline rush due to the fact that your parents never let you go to them and you either snuck out or lied about going. You didnât have to worry about the limitations of parents this go around.
The boys disappeared almost immediately upon arrival, leaving you to fend for yourself in the very crowded fraternity house. You could hardly pass through a room without bumping into somebodyâs shoulder or elbow, huffing as you maneuver around the house equivalent to a sardine can. Your drink nearly spilled onto your top multiple times and you were glad you decided against the heels for the night.
You chugged the rest of the jungle juice in your cup as you stepped onto the patio, where itâs just as noisy and just as packed. Youâre lucky enough to find an empty lounge chair near the houseâs pool, unoccupied and calling your name. When your legs touch the plastic chair, you flinch at how hot it is, most likely from being in the sun all day.
âWoah, do you want a cushion?â
You look up at the source of the voice. Youâve seen him around campus before, and even at Changminâs games. Lee Juyeon was just one of those people that you had to know, unless youâd been living under a rock. Just like everyone else in the world, you couldnât deny how attractive he was. From this distance, you truly understood why girls would giggle like high schoolers over the guy.
âUh, sure. Yeah, that would be great actually.â You nod, watching as he wanders towards the shed in the corner of the big ass backyard. He returns promptly, holding his red solo cup between his teeth and one hand on your lower back guiding you to a standing position so he could place down the cushion.
âAs a thank you, can I get your name?â He gives you a cocky little smile that shouldâve been a warning. And looking back on it, you shouldâve seen his true personality sooner, to be completely honest. The way his lips curled at the corners, like a conniving bastard who got off on irritating others.
âItâs Y/N,â you say, messing with your empty cup. âIâd ask for yours, but I kinda already know.â
He laughs at that, scratching the back of his neck. âThatâs not surprising.â Itâs at this point that youâre starting to see through his sweet facade, but despite knowing betterâ despite always keeping your guard upâ you let yourself fall for it just this once. All because you didnât want to fuck things up for Changmin. He owed you big time.
âWell, you are a talented athlete.â You didnât want to fuel what is probably already a massive ego, but youâd rather compliment his baseball skills than the fact that he was infamous for screwing around with half of the girls on campus. Technically, that was a feat of its own since heâd only been in school for a year.
âOh, so you think Iâm talented?â He rested a hand on your chair, leaning down to your level. Confidence oozed from every corner of his being and if you werenât so self aware, perhaps you couldâve ended up like all those other victims of his charismatic behavior.
âI go to the games for Changmin,â you scoff, glancing away from his face to stop the heat rising up your neck. âIâve only paid attention to you once or twice.â
âYeah, sure. Let's go with that,â he bites his lip, blatantly checking you out. âI wouldnât mind paying attention to you a little.â
âIâm unimpressed, Juyeon,â you snort, raising an eyebrow at him. âDoes this shit really work on everyone?â
âI can drop the act if you want, baby. Just let me know when youâre ready to stop playing hard to get.â He stands upright, running a hand through his hair.
Every time you ran into Lee Juyeon after that, he was more and more insufferable. He knew his influence on you, too, if his smug fucking grin was anything to go by. You wish you could just slap it off of him. However, you stood by being the bigger person in any given situation, so that was off the table. (And half of you still felt a moral obligation to not get your friend into hot water.)
âWould it kill you to play nice every once in a while? I do live with the dude, you know.â Changmin whines, trailing you in the supermarket like a lost puppy.
âHeâs got a point, N/N,â Kevin adds, humming as he tosses a boxed dinner into the cart. âI get that heâs a little bit of an overconfident douche, but rolling your eyes at him when he hasnât even done anything just makes it worse on you. And JiChang, too, I guess.â
âBroâŠâ
You werenât even sure why he decided to tag along with you and the other boys when you mentioned grocery shopping. In fact, he might as well have stayed his ass home if he was just going to gang up on you the whole time. Chanhee sighs dramatically, bringing your shopping cart to a halt.
âCan we not have a peaceful grocery trip? Is that impossible or something?â His lips form a thin line. âI swear, all we do is talk about how much Y/N hates Lee Juyeon. Can we please move on?â
âThank you, Chanhee, I agree,â you nod along, walking backwards as you do so and ignoring the faces your friends make. âHe makes me want to kill myself.â
âWho makes you want to kill yourself?â
You jump up, frightened by the sudden voice in your ear. Your friends all give you sheepish smiles, as if theyâd already tried to warn you. (What shitty jobs they did.) With a hand over your heart, you turn around to meetâ speak of the devilâ none other than Lee Juyeon himself.
âWhat are you doing here?â Your eyes narrow and your arms cross over your chest. Luck could never be on your side when it came to this guy.
âUh, last I checked, this was a public supermarket. Where I can publicly shop. I wasnât aware that I had to run that by you. So sorry, sweetheart.â He pouts, his expression so theatrical you nearly give in to your constant urge to punch him in the face.
You feel your eye twitch, and it takes everything in you to step back and assess just how bad it would be if you committed murder right now. Changmin comes to your rescue, doing damage control as best as he can while Kevin attempts to talk you out of becoming a criminal.
The two frat brothers do their little fraternity handshake thing and then finally heâs out of sight, out of mind, allowing you to visibly relax. Chanhee purses his lips. âOkay, so maybe I do see where the anger comes from. And holy shit, Y/N, you have the patience of a saint.â
âThe person you have called is unavailable! At the tone, please leave a message. When you have finished recording, you mayââ
âGoddammit.â You curse, ending the unsuccessful call.
The downside of working far from campus, was working far from campus. You didnât have your own car and usually relied on one of your roommates for a ride to and from. But now here you are, stranded at work while itâs pouring cats and dogs outside. Kevin was in class and Chanhee wasnât picking up his phone. You could call Changmin, but youâre pretty sure he also had a class around this time.
Just as youâre about to succumb to your demise, you receive a text from Chanhee.
[2:57 pm] michael jackson: IM SO SORRY AJNSSJNW BUT SOMETHING CAME UP WITH A GROUP PROJECT
[2:57 pm] michael jackson: DONT WORRY THOUGH, IVE GOT IT COVERED UR STILL GETTING PICKED UP
âCould today get any worse?â You mutter to yourself, locking your phone and tossing it into your purse. As if your timing couldnât be better, you spoke entirely too soon. Your eyes squint at the unfamiliar car rolling up under the carport. Your brows furrowed in confusion, because you had no idea who could be your saving grace. Chanhee was a wild card so who knew who he had on speed dial.
But then the passenger window rolls down and you wish the ground would just swallow you whole. Lee Juyeon grins that stupid fucking grin of his, beckoning you to his car as it unlocks when he shifts into park. You shake your head.
âNo way. There is absolutely no way I am getting into that car.â You shout over the pelting rain.
Juyeon tsks, his eyes rolling when he reaches over the center console to open the door for you. âIs there anyone else who would drop everything theyâre doing to pick you up in this weather?â
Your lips pull into a flat line. The answer was no, you didnât have anyone else who would drop everything they were doing to pick you up in this weather. That was the reason Juyeon was here, you supposed. It didnât mean you werenât at least going down without a fight, though. Except, Lee Juyeon was a man who was all too comfortable with how expressive you were. Most notably towards him.
âWhat? Cat got your tongue, sweetheart?â
âFuck you. Iâd rather walk.â You seethe, starting straight in the direction of your apartment. Juyeon groans at first, your constant need to prove yourself getting on his nerves for once. Then his eyes widen slightly when he realizes youâre not joking.
The truth was that the rain was freezing and youâd love to be in the shelter of a warm car. In fact, you didnât really care that Juyeon was the person driving. But you were too deep into the bit now. You couldnât just turn around and get in the car, for you had a pride to protect at this point.
âShit.â Juyeon swears under his breath, reaching into the backseat to grab an umbrella. Sure he loved to tease you and rile you up, but he wasnât cruel. Your friends would have his head on a silver platter if he let anything happen to you.
You pause in your steps when youâre no longer being showered in rain water. Juyeon holds the umbrella over your head with a worried expression. You feel kind of bad for making him chase after you even though heâd already gone out of his way to pick you up. Sometimes you wish your ego wasnât so fragile. Maybe then you could accept help when you needed it instead of making things worse.
âCan you please stop being so stubborn and just get in the damn car, Y/N? Do you have to make everything difficult all the time?â Usually, pissing you off made him over the moon, but you can tell heâs not exactly pleased at the moment. You swallow thickly, nodding quietly and following him back to his car.
The whole drive to your apartment is silent save for the song playing on his speakers. Itâs not as loud in comparison to the storm outside, but youâre grateful that itâs filling the space between you. If only Lee Juyeon hadnât done such an excellent job ticking you off like a bomb, then maybe you wouldâve just hopped in the passenger seat with ease. But no, he had to goad you until you made an irrational decision and now here you are.
As he pulls up to your building, you say a little prayer that you donât regret your next actions. He stops as close to the stairs as he can, but you turn to him before unbuckling your seatbelt. With a deep breath, you ask, âWould you like toâ uhâ come inside?â
He glances from you to the stairs and then shrugs, parking in the nearest empty spot. He holds the umbrella over both of you as you make your way to your unit, lightly sprinting so you donât get anymore soaked than you already are. You figured the least you could do was invite the dude into your home and offer him some hot tea, just so he could warm up before heading back to the TBZ house. Your roommates not being here to make fun of you was also a plus.
Thereâs still an unspoken tension even after youâve shed your raincoats and shoes by the front door, settling into your apartment and its coziness. Juyeon sits at the breakfast bar as you busy yourself with preparing the kettle and getting a couple tea bags. His watchful gaze is a little intimidating now that youâve seen his serious side.
Once youâve finished making the tea, you set his mug in front of him. You look everywhere but him when you say, âIâm gonna take a shower if youâre okay waiting out here by yourself.â He doesnât respond verbally, so you take it as your cue to leave.
You turn on the water to let it heat up before gathering your essentials. When youâve completed your back and forth trip from the bathroom and your bedroom, youâre finally ready to just relax in your shower and forget about todayâs events. But how could you ever truly relax with Lee Juyeon in your space, permeating your peace?
As youâre shutting the bathroom door, a foot jams itself between the threshold and stops you. You glance up from the floor to meet Juyeonâs eyes. Theyâre darker than youâre used to, a deep shade of brown that has your stomach twisting into knots.
âYou know, Y/N, this game of cat and mouse is starting to get old,â he takes a step into the steaming room, locking the door behind him and trapping you. âJust admit to yourself that you want me.â
You sputter at his bold words, because you donât. You donât want Lee Juyeon. Why would you want Lee Juyeon? âIâm not gonna lie to myself. I donât want you.â
He laughs humorlessly, closing the gap between you just a little more. You donât have it in you to back away from him. He reaches a hand up to tuck some damp hair behind your ear. Youâre still wet and cold from your stupid idea to walk in the rain, but Juyeon plans to warm you up perfectly. âYou sure?â
âPositive,â you breathe.
âWhy donât we test that theory?â Now heâs got you backed into the wall, his face a hairâs breadth distance from your own. âI have a feeling I can change your mind.â
You donât know if itâs the heat of the bathroom or Juyeonâs lips being so close, but so far simultaneously that has your brain turning into static. Your head feels fuzzy, like youâre watching TV on an empty channel through a blurry lens. You lick your lips, vision trained on his. âWhy donât we?â
Thatâs all the confirmation he needs to press your mouths together in a searing kiss, hotter than the temperature of the room. You feel him smile against you when you make no move to push him away, instead carding your fingers through his hair. He groans when you tug a bit, twirling the longer strands around your index.
His hands slip under your top, thumbs rubbing circles into your waist. This is a terrible idea. Deep down youâre fully aware that youâre probably making a huge mistake by giving into Juyeon just like every other girl on campus ever has. But paired with how intoxicating his mouth feels on your own and the steam filled bathroom clouding your head, you canât seem to find a logical reason to stop.
When you part for air, you both start stripping your top layers, resuming your attacks on each otherâs lips once youâre left in nothing but undergarments. Juyeon trails kisses along the side of your neck, nipping and sucking wherever he feels fit. You gasp when he finds that particular spot that contributes to the butterflies fluttering about your stomach. âGod, youâre so annoying.â
âYeah?â And despite getting ready to give you the pleasure of your life, his grin against your skin still manages to irritate you. âYou hate me so much, huh?â
âMhm,â you whine as his fingers dip beneath the band of your panties, toying with your sensitive cunt. âHate you so badâ ahâŠâ
âYou might wanna shut up soon, sweetheart,â Juyeon warns, sliding his ring finger between your lower lips. âOr else Iâll give that mouth something to do.â
âIâll do whatever I want,â you pull his hand from your underwear, kneeling in front of him when he furrows his eyebrows in confusion. Your nails scrape lightly down his abdomen before hooking into the waistband of his briefs, freeing him from the material. It takes a lot out of you to not visibly react at the sight of his cock, hard and flushed to the tip. You couldnât dare inflate his ginormous ego, the situation you were currently in already doing enough on its own. His size is impressive too, making you wonder just how he expects you to take him like a champ.
âWhat a fucking brat,â he hisses, your tongue swiping along the underside of his dick. âAlways gotta have the last word, donât you?â
âMmmm,â you moan, mouth full with just the tip. Youâd never been the type of person who cared about size. As long as they knew what they were doing and made you finish, you held no qualms with their length. In fact, you donât think you ever even paid much attention to anyoneâs dick in your life. But if there was anything to back Lee Juyeonâs cockiness, it had to be, well, his cock.
âYou have no idea how many times Iâve imagined this moment,â he confesses, wrapping your hair around his hand into a makeshift ponytail. âBut, fuck, this is so much better.â
The admission shoots straight to your core and you find yourself whimpering, the vibrations against his dick driving him crazy. He has to support his weight with one hand flat to the wall, the other still tightly fisting your hair. With every suck and flick of your tongue, he tugs a little more, the sting on your scalp providing you with more pleasure than pain. You pull off of him to take a breath, jerking him off as you do so.
âAm I meeting your expectations?â You bat your eyelashes up at him, drool sliding down your chin and makeup smeared under your eyes in tear streaks. He groans at the sight of you, forcing you to a standing position so he could kiss you again.
You start dragging him towards the shower, unhooking your bra and stepping out of your panties. He raises an eyebrow at you, amused. âYou want me to fuck you in the shower, baby? Have you slipping all over my cock?â
âDuh,â you canât help but roll your eyes at his question, practically pawing at his underwear to get him out of them fully. âDid you think I sucked your dick on the bathroom floor for fun?â
âThat mouth of yours is gonna get you in trouble one of these days.â
He kicks them off, reconnecting your lips as you step into the shower. The hot water hits your back almost like a massage, synchronously getting in your mouth as you make out with Juyeon aggressively. Itâs like he canât get enough of you, big hands kneading and groping everywhere and nowhere all at once. You feel insane, especially with how good of a kisser he is. Itâs like youâre on cloud nine and nothingâs capable of bringing you down.
When heâs finally lost his patience, he spins you around, pressing you cheek first to the shower wall. You feel him against your lower back, his lips leveling with your ear. In spite of acting as if he had himself under control, you can hear the pant in his breathing, deep voice a little desperate than usual. He has a hand gripping your thigh and picking up your leg.
âNo protection?â He asks, his cock already gliding between your folds in anticipation.
âMm-mm,â you shake your head as best you can with his body sandwiching you to the tiled surface. âWanna feel you raw.â
âFuck, you canât say shit like that to me,â Juyeon groans into your ear, giving no warning as he spits down your front and hikes your leg higher, thrusting into your cunt. âYouâll make me wanna stay buried in you forever.â
You moan, hand coming up to hold the side of his head as he fucks you into the shower wall. If someone were to ask about this very moment, you werenât too sure how youâd defend yourself. A moment of weakness, perhaps? But if a moment of weakness felt this fucking good every time, you might fall into a habit of judgment lapses.
He nuzzles his face in the crook of your neck, nibbling and biting your shoulder and the surrounding area with each snap of his hips. The angle he drives into you at has stars forming at the back of your vision, the tip of his cock brushing that one spot deep inside of you whenever he thrusts up. You donât even think his entire dick is in you as he does this, but you also donât really have the mind to care, way too focused on memorizing the veins of his shaft with your walls.
Youâre far too gone to consider the consequences of your actions, the horizon of your release just beyond your fingertips now. Youâd never needed someone so viscerally before, so carnally. Yet here you were, sucking Lee Juyeonâs cock in with your pussy like you were a damn vacuum. The sounds youâre making bounce back and forth on the walls, no doubt louder than the shower water itself.
âIâ I-Iâm soâ fuck,â you mewl, words wobbling. âIâm so, so close, Juyo.â
âYeah, baby?â He sighs in your ear, nudging your sensitive clit with his thumb while raising your leg as much as he physically can. âMe too, where do you want me?â
âInside,â you donât think you even make sense anymore, babbling as he continues to fuck you stupid. âPlease. Want you to cum inside me.â
Juyeon grits his teeth, pleased with himself that he didnât orgasm right then and there. He uses his last ounce of strength to get the two of you off together. âCâmon, sweetheart, cum for me.â
The fogginess subsides pretty quickly after youâve finished, your brain registering what just happened almost instantaneously. If you werenât so hypersensitive, you wouldâve pulled him out yourself and scrambled to flee the scene. (And maybe even the country.) There are many more rational thoughts running through your head now. The entire trajectory of your life has just been changed, whether you realized it or not. But the biggest issue was:
What the hell do you do now?
© juyeonszn. do not steal, claim, or repost.
#the boyz#the boyz x reader#the boyz smut#tbz#tbz x reader#tbz smut#the boyz juyeon#tbz juyeon#lee juyeon x reader#lee juyeon smut#juyeon x reader#juyeon smut#juyeonszn#juyeonszn.100đȘ©
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Hi, was wondering if you could write a dadrry social media au? Could be about anything, just love to see that content â€ïž amazing work btw!
pairing: Harry Styles x famous!reader
summary: just dadrry and his sweet family of five
a/n: a little fic based in the famous!reader universe!
masterlist taglist famous!reader
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
harryupdates
liked by ynupdates, hArrysbtch and 65 292 others
harryupdates HARRY and his youngest baby were seen hiking in Italy!!
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ynupdates that's certainly a way to hold a baby!
harrysmoustache FATHER IS HERE
stylesbabie you're the real one for putting this emoji on baby's face! i saw others not being so considerate
‷ harryupdates of course! it's a child and besides the as it was bts neither yn or harry posted their face
harrysmylife here i thought he would stop walking so much after having children. nope! now, he's bringing them with himself!
ynsmymama i saw photos with their oldest baby there as well, yn's having some me time
hArrysbtch y'all here praising him for being a father and here i am staring at his arms. my man got some guns on himself
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yourinstagram
liked by harrystyles, ynupdates and 6 492 392 others
yourinstagram being heavily pregnant during winter >>>>> during the summer
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harrystyles You look flawlessly.
‷ yourinstagram nothing you say will give back my biscuit
‷ harrystyles We have two packs in the pantry.
‷ yourinstagram yeah? but that one had the most raisins i've ever seen on a biscuit. and you ate it.
annetwist As soon as you'll be back in London I am taking kids for a week. I miss them!
‷ yourinstagram you're the best, mum. can you take your child as well?
‷ harrystyles Rude.
‷ annetwist Of course! You need some alone time!
gemmastyles hello, sexy mama. are you single?
‷ yourinstagram i am for the next twenty minutes. let's make the most of it. gelato?
ynupdates you're glowing
harryupdates what a beautiful family
ynsmymama how do you like the ball exercises? because i hated them during my pregnancy
‷ yourinstagram hi child! and tbh i don't exercise on that ball. i just roll on it
‷ ynsmybestie ICON
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YN via IG story
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harryupdates
liked by ynupdates and 34 202 others
harryupdates HARRY was seen walking to the hospital in London! It's the hospital where YN and him went to a few days ago.
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ynupdates ohhhh, this is a fresh dad Harry
hArrysbtch that's the man that for the third time, THIRD TIME became a father
harrysmoustache DILF
ynsmybestie i love how cozy he looks
stylesbabie finally that big ass bag is full of necessary shit
harrysmylife when is he going to start wearing dad clothes? i can't wait to swoon over a man dressing like any father on the planet, because I will
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Harry via his IG story
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harryupdates
liked by hArrysbtch, harrysmoustache and 45 392 others
harryupdates HARRY was at the playdate with both of his and YN's older kids!
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hArrysbtch hot dad at the playdate???
stylesbabie i hope those mums and dads are respectful
harrysmylife i asked for a dad outfit and he delivered
‷ harrysmoustache definitely! my dad dresses the same
ynupdates he looks good, fatherhood is treating him good
‷ hArrysbtch i wouldn't expect anything else
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
dailymail
liked by user45 and 279 302 others
dailymail Harry Styles and wife, YN YSN, were asked to leave the restaurant after customers and staff were disturbed by YN breastfeeding their newborn. Our source says that after having a conversation, led by YN, the manager of the restaurant didn't change his decision. Harry escorted YN and their child to the car and then came back to have a talk with the management of the restaurant. Apparently, he was visibly furious and on the edge of losing his temper. After a discussion and manager's attempts to apologise, Harry stormed off.
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harryupdates I'm not surprised he was furious! was yn supposed to starve their child?
ynupdates it's 21st century and people are still scared of women breastfeeding
ynsmybestie who was disturbed, men or women?
‷ stylesbabie the article said it was three men complain
‷ ynsmybestie I'm sadly not surprised
ynsmymama if they were so bothered by her breastfeeding near others, they could propose her some private room and not throw them out of the restaurant!
‷ ynsmybestie but they shouldn't have a problem with it. she shouldn't leave restaurant for feeding her child
‷ ynsmymama of course! but wanting to please all the customers you adjust to the situation. they didn't do thag
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
yourinstagram
liked by harrystyles, annetwist, ynupdates, harryupdates and 8 302 302 others
yourinstagram Hello, you little people in my phone! As most of you know (because of Daily Mail) two days ago, my husband, our child, and I were asked to leave the restaurant we ate at, because of causing disturbance to other customers. The said disturbance was me breastfeeding our child. Before our waiter and then the manager talked with us, my husband took a picture (above) (he really takes pictures of everything) showing what was visible while breastfeeding (A BREAST !!). There really was no conversation between two parties. When asked if covering myself with a cloth would be more comfortable, I was just once again asked to leave the restaurant. No person should be forbidden to feed their children in public. I shouldn't have asked if covering myself would be more comfortable with others. No. We shouldn't accept this kind of non written 'rules'. With everything said, I wasn't going to let our child starve and went to feed her in a car, so no stranger eyes could see a breast. In the link in bio you can find a great article about breastfeeding in public and what parents go through to please the strangers being bothered by a flesh of naked skin. Be kind to each other. YN.
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harrystyles You are the best mother our children could have. And the best partner I could find and share the life with.
‷ yourinstagram I love you.
annetwist â„ïžâ„ïž
gemmastyles You tell'em sister
ynupdates I am so mad that you needed to made a statement about it. sick.
harryupdates people are very delicate when it comes to breastfeeding but have no problem with parading without a shirt on
hArrysbtch im just gonna focus on how precious that picture is, and the fact that harry is that type of a father to snap pictures of everything
‷ yourinstagram he really is, those 256gb are straining and in need of expanding
‷ harrystyles Not my fault they don't allow SD cards anymore.
‷ hArrysbtch we love a millennial
harrysmoustache that restaurant is going to flood with negative reviews right now
ââââââââââââââââââââââââââââââ
harrystyles
liked by yourinstagram, annetwist and 11 291 492 others
harrystyles To the best woman I know, thank you for choosing me to be your partner and father of our beautiful children. There is no moment in the day or night when I don't think about how lucky and fulfilled I feel spending my life with you. Happy birthday, my love. Your, H.
comments to this post have been limited
yourinstagram Come downstairs. There are now words to describe my love.
annetwist Happy birthday, YN. I believe there could be no other person more perfect to be in our lives.
gemmastyles Happy birthday, wifey!!!
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a/n: should i write some blurbs about dadrry?
#harry styles#harry styles x reader#harry styles x you#harry styles imagine#harry styles fanfiction#harry styles instagram#harry styles fake ig#harry styles one shot#famous!reader#dad!harry
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â€ïžđ€đ #RWRB #RWRBMovie #RedWhiteAndRoyalBlue
Casey being iconic-i just love Them so much!!
#CaseyMcQuiston
. https://twitter.com/ThisIsGSage23/status/1791335511728013403?s=19 .
"I just really wanted to explore both of those characters and I wanted to do it in a way that I hadn't really seen before, and also just like as a queer person I want to make queer art and that's what I'm drawn and that's what I'm interested in. So I kind of had these two different ideas, it was like one idea was that I would write a book about this rebellious first kid who's like figuring out that they're queer and what does that mean for their like political aspirations; and the other was about you know sort of a member of the royal family under all of this pressure to carry on this legacy and like what does that mean if they're gay. Um-And I'm just like kind of weighing these two different stories and deciding where I wanted to go and then I just kind of had this moment of like What If I didn't have to choose and it was the same story because they fall in love with each other? And-Um-You know in a classic bisexual fashion I was like I'm gonna have both, so I did!"
"It was really important to me that Alex was explicitly bisexual because like, you know, I really wanted the representation of like this bisexual character and then it was important to me that he was also Mexican like he is in the book and that he was played by a Mexican actor. (..) It was really important to me that, um, I didn't want any, I didn't want Alex or Henry, no matter how their stories were translated to the screen, I didn't want either of them to have any type of, um, like shame or resentment towards themselves for being queer, it was really important to me that the stakes of their lives and their like inner conflict was much more based on like the circumstances that they're in. It's like they don't hate themselves for being gay-or for being bi-they just wish that it was easier to be who they were in the world that they live in."
"..Taylor embodies that so beautifully. (..) I think he's just killer in that role. And Nick, I mean, if you like turned me upside down and shook me like he would fall out my brain as Henry (..) doesn't have blue eyes but they sure are sad eyes and that is exactly what they need to be."
"I see myself in Alex, tremendously, I'm very much in Alex, I relate to him so much, uh, truly, I think he's the most like me of all my characters."
"I very much would love screenwriting to become part of what I do, I'll say it that way."
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BTW for everyone interested: Red, White & Royal Blue: Collector's Edition Henry PoV bonus chapter by Casey Mcquiston : https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/752528941905018880?source=share
CMQ spotify (characters' playlists!!) https://open.spotify.com/user/p873j0jdmqn5hye7cakdnub7e/playlists
+ also queer history/facts from RWRB(Alex engaging with queer history)(thank you SO. MUCH. CASEY MCQUISTON!!)-GREAT POST here on tumblr!!-many links here, lots of information! (Waterloo Vase, Stonewall, SCOTUS decision 2015, Walt Whitman, Laws of Illinois 1961, The White Nights Riots, Paris Is Burning, THAT David Wojnarowicz photo 'If I Die Of AIDS-Forget Burial-Just Drop My Body On The Steps Of The F.D.A' https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/757305651356729344?source=share (I encourage you to research more about David!!) , Thisbe & Pyramus, The V & A, James I & George Villiers and MORE!!) https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/757308307835895808?source=share (Learning about things referenced in Red, White & Royal Blue, thank you @ elipheleh)
+https://www.vulture.com/article/casey-mcquiston-red-white-and-royal-blue-the-pairing-interview.html
+https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/taylor-zakhar-perez-casey-mcquiston-interview-red-white-royal-blue-1235975977/
.https://ew.com/taylor-zakhar-perez-honors-nicholas-galitzine-entertainers-of-the-year-2024-8759399 +CAST OF RED WHITE & ROYAL BLUE |FYC Panel - Consider Amazon:https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/769737016086839297?source=share
.https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/758778031058862080?source=share
+
youtube
youtube
#casey mcquiston#cmq#rwrb#red white and royal blue#rwrb 2#rwrb movie#rwrb 2023#red white and royal blue 2#rwrb sequel#red white and royal blue movie#firstprince#matthew lopez#nick galitzine#nicholas galitzine#taylor zakhar perez#tzp#henry fox#henry fox mountchristen windsor#henry fox x arthur fox#alex claremont diaz#prince henry of wales#prince henry rwrb#nora holleran#cmq is a god#cmq4#cmq5#the pairing#more cmq#kit fairfield#theo flowerday
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Exploring Kurosawa's internalized homophobia and compulsive heteronormativity
oh yea baby we bustin out the Big Words for this one đ
This was supposed to be posted at the end of pride month but Life happened and it got delayed a lot đ© So yea happy pride month (and happy birthday Kurosawa I guess đ)
(btw I think I've never mentioned this on any of my other posts but english is not my first language, so if anything I write ever sounds awkward, that's probably why đ
) (also I had to merge a bunch of images to get around the image limit, this post is really long, the word count is at 1930 words đ)
Hope you guys enjoy the read! đ
Spoilers for anything up to vol 11
Let me start this by saying that there's no actual textual evidence of Kurosawa being gay (rather than bi/pan), so this interpretation is definitely veering towards headcanon territory. I'm also not trying to establish this as the only Correct opinion and anyone is of course allowed to have their own sexuality headcanons, this is very healthy and valid đ
Kurosawa's internalized homophobia
The first scene I want to put under a magnifying glass is this one.
Let's examine what's going on here: Kurosawa has just tried to kiss Adachi, whose hesitation he perceived as disgust. Then he pretends it was disgusting for him too, because he thinks that is the average reaction anyone would have, extending this to Adachi as well. The way he says "who'd be into that?" is already lowkey homophobic, but the japanese line makes it even more evident: "æźéć«ă ăăȘ" (= "Normally, you'd dislike that right?"). Keyword here being "æźé" = "normal, ordinary", implying that anyone who would like that is abnormal. So what does that say about him then, who was so happy to get the chance to kiss another man? This is pretty much textbook internalized homophobia, where he has accepted what he perceives to be the general opinion on gay people and has made those values his own, hating himself for it (albeit only briefly here), which is why he internally apologizes to Adachi.
This is not the only instance of him feeling like that, although this next part is slightly more speculative than the more obvious example above.
So we all know that Kurosawa is a jealous, jealous man. It's one of his defining character traits and it's often the source of conflict and comedy alike. But he does not express his jealousy equally across genders. With men he has this strong rivalry where he needs to prove himself better and more worthy of Adachi's attention.
But with women he has a different approach: gently coaxing them away from him, lest they realize what a catch Adachi really is.
So, why this difference? The answer I have is that he doesn't actually believe he can compete with a woman. If Adachi wants to be close with a man, Kurosawa thinks it might as well be him, he's the best option after all. But if Adachi wants a woman, he cannot offer anything and is therefore the inferior option. He believes this even after he found out Adachi's not completely repulsed at the idea of being with a man. Even if Adachi's okay with men, he'll always prefer a woman.
And whenever he imagines anyone else with Adachi, it's always a woman, specifically Fujisaki, which he believes is "his type".
And he at least thinks he's very far away from that ideal. (He's not but that's a topic for a different essay.) If anyone's wondering why he even bothers at all then if he's so sure that a woman will out-compete him, I think the lyrics from the anime opening actually put it best, specifically the last verse:
I have these impatient feelings I doubt this love will come to fruition But still I can't give up this happiness There's a feeling here I can't resist A love like a castle in the sky
So basically, his plan is that he might as well ride the high of his first ever crush as far as it will go, intercepting where he can to prolong it just that little bit further, until it all inevitably comes to an end. (a castle in the sky = an unreachable dream) This plan kind of fluctuates throughout volumes 1-3 as Adachi gives him a bunch of mixed signals, but it holds true most of the time.
Adachi's side
Now I'd like to highlight the way Adachi actually thinks about their relationship, because it serves as a great contrast to Kurosawa's assumptions about him.
Throughout the first three volumes we see him grapple with his newfound feelings for Kurosawa, but he (almost) never puts his gender at the forefront of his musings. The manga makes it very clear that it's his lack of romantic experience and low self esteem that make it hard for him to accept Kurosawa's affections, and not the fact that he's a man.
This second page here being his own little gay awakening, where he realizes that he is not, in fact, disgusted by intimacy with a man.
It's also worth mentioning that when he later introduces Kurosawa to his parents (ch 41), they are immediately welcoming of him, suggesting he grew up in a very tolerant environment.
And it's not like he's completely unaware of heteronormativity/homophobia either, especially after he does his research in vol 8, but he is slightly more defiant in responding to it.
(I love how he just buys that bag he probably doesn't need that's supposed to come with all the wedding magazines, just as this very tiny act of rebellion.)
So now that we can see how different Kurosawa's thought patterns are compared to Adachi's, the next question we should ask ourselves is: Why is he like that?
Heteronormativity in Kurosawa's life
(yes we're finally getting to the comphet part of the essay đ)
First let's look at the environment he grew up in. There are not many scenes with his family, but from those that we do have, we can at least make some assumptions about how he must've been raised.
His mother is clearly the authority figure in his life, judging by how she's described as "strong" and how terrified he is at her merely setting down a teacup (while Adachi has a more mild reaction). Her reaction to the news of them dating and Kurosawa expecting his parents to go as far as disowning him for it would suggest that she might just be generally homophobic.
But when they actually go meet her we see this slightly more nuanced perspective.
She's not entirely against it, but she does believe they are making a mistake by choosing to be together, hence why she thinks they might "regret it". There's many hardships that gay couples in Japan face, some of which we even see discussed in the manga, so it's not hard to see why she would be concerned for her son. The way she talks about Kurosawa never causing any problems, but "changing" ever since he fell for Adachi further supports that conformity is what she believes will ultimately lead to a successful, happy life. And that's also why she accepts Adachi later, when he's made it abundantly clear in his speech that they are happier in this non-conforming relationship than they were without it.
To contrast, her other child Mari is shown to have a very progressive stance (see: her pep talk in ch 47) and it would not surprise me if that is the reason she's rarely in japan and is never seen together with her family, save for the one time they're all at the wedding. She might find the conforming environment too restrictive and preferring to keep her distance. (shoutout to naina for this bit đ)
So that's Kurosawa's family situation. Now let's check how his social circle holds up.
From what we see of his friends, they never even seem to consider him possibly being with a man.
And his work environment seems rather toxic to say the least.
It clearly dictates traditional gender roles as the ideal. Nobody except Fujisaki even clocks any of Kurosawa's advances on Adachi as romantic in nature, even though he seems to be quite obvious about it (see: ch 34.5). And it's not like dating in general is discouraged at Toyokawa either, as we can see from all the women constantly vying for Kurosawa's attention.
From all this we can conclude that Kurosawa's upbringing and social/work environment is painfully heteronormative and until he falls for Adachi it seems he never questioned the status quo either.
The famous onsen scene, while funny, also reveals the sad truth that Kurosawa, in his 30 years of life, probably never even had the chance to explore his sexual orientation, rather focusing on being "perfect" in his straight relationships.
Speaking of those relationships...
He apparently had a bunch of girlfriends, who all seem to have dumped him pretty early on. His mother's surprise at him expressing a willingness to commit also makes me think he's never brought anyone home either. He also only seems to have a surface level understanding of what a proper relationship is supposed to entail, if his idea of an ideal date is just "what the average person" thinks is romantic. So why were all of his relationships so short-lived? Before I answer that...
Intermission: Kurosawa's smiles
It has come to my attention that this is not common knowledge, so let me explain: There's a way to tell apart Kurosawa's fake smiles from his real ones, without any context clues, just purely visually.
Real smiles: (ch 23, 24, 37)
Fake smiles: (ch 5, 13, 32)
The difference being very simple: Blush = real, no blush = fake đ And before anyone mentions it: No he doesn't just blush when he's around Adachi, that last fake smile is actually directed at him. (ch 32)
Edit from the future: This holds true like 90% of the time, but as Toyota's art style becomes more detailed, this doesn't apply as much in the newer volumes. I think there's also new details added that I haven't quite figured out yet so take this bit with a grain of salt. (The images below are still from her early art style though.)
So now that we have this additional knowledge, let's take a look at every instance Kurosawa is paired with a woman.
He's smiling in all of these. Not a single one has a real smile in it though.
I think he's never actually had his heart in any of his relationships, and the girls probably noticed it and that's why they dumped him.
And, of course, the first time he actually falls in love...
... just so happens to be with a man.
Even his friends comment on this, who have known him since high school.
It's almost funny how perfectly this aligns with real life gay people. Having numerous, short-lived relationships with people of the "wrong" gender is one of the more common traits of compulsive heteronormativity. (source: me oof) (but also shoutout to the "Am I a lesbian?" masterdoc, google it if you don't know, it's truly eye-opening)
After dating Adachi
So we have already established that he's far happier when he does finally get to date Adachi, but do any of his other thought patterns change?
Honestly it seems like he throws every single reservation about being seen as gay out the window.
He starts bragging like crazy about his new relationship to anyone willing (and unwilling) to listen, he has no qualms about PDA, he marks Adachi up and down so everyone knows he's taken and the only thing stopping him from proclaiming his love for Adachi to the whole world is the still very much existing societal homophobia. But he is a lot more easy-going about it now than he ever was before.
And I think the best way to describe this mental shift is, hear me out, the date song from volume 4...
... specifically the last 2 verses as a whole, and this section in particular:
"I won't let anyone divide our fraction! You couldn't pry this thrill from my hands when they're cold and dead!"
Horrible lyrics aside, this perfectly encapsulates how Kurosawa simply couldn't care less anymore now that he finally has what he's wanted for more than a year, maybe even his whole life. All the societal pressure pales in comparison to the sheer euphoria he feels at finally having someone that he loves and who loves him back just as strongly, feeling cared for and seen like no one else ever did.
And, you know, just happens to be a man. đłïžâđ
#cherry magic#my essays#this is the mother of all essays I've ever done jesus christ#this thing spawned like 8 other post ideas btw#can't wait to finally get to those lmao
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Reveal â Part two: editing
Pairing: Yoongi x fem!reader ( camboy!yoongi x camgirl!reader )Â Wordcount: 1,735 words Genre: 18+, mdni, remainder to not use fanfics as your only source of sex ed. Summary: Yoongi is just helping a friend help you, but is he even supposed to listen to this?. Part 2 of Reveal: recording. Read it for context. This is just why and how we got to that ending. More warnings under read more.
Includes: Mentions of selling sex content. People recording sex acts. Mentions of sexual activity ( doing things and also talking about doing things and thinking about doing more things ). Mentions of past and not past masturbation ( f and m ). Dirty talk? I guess?. Sprinkle of possessive yoongi? Is not my fault i sweaaaar Author's note: Remember when I started writing something short and silly lmao, what a time. Btw, I have never used OF so if something I say about how they use the website is actually not true / completely wrong just pretend please lmao. Anyway, I thought it'd be fun to write Yoongi's side, hope you like it! If you do please remember to leave a comment, reblog, ask, follow and what not. Thank you for reading <3
Saturday is probably Yoongi's favorite day of the week. No waking up early, no work, and not worrying about having to do any of those the next day.
That's why he groans when his phone rings with messages from Jungkook. He knows is him because he is the only one who still insists on sending him a million messages instead of just one.Â
Love the guy, but he can be annoying.
The fifth ring comes and hopping is the last one, Yoongi finally reaches for his phone and rolls to his back.Â
JK: hey JK: are you awake? JK: and free today? JK: i need a favor JK: yoongi?
Yoongi: with what? If I have to leave my house is probably a no.
Both of them know that actually, even if it ruined his plans of relaxing, he would say yes. Because that's what friends do.
JK: no no. You can do it at your house JK: I need to edit an audio for my friend JK: but I'm on the schedule today JK: and if I don't send it back quickly she will back out JK: please?Â
Yoongi: ok. Send it to me. Yoongi: you own me, tho.
Throwing his phone on the bed, he gets out of it to grab a bottle of water from the fridge, getting ready to sit in his studio for at least an hour. He knows is probably a bit extra to use his expensive equipment for whatever this favor is, but if he is going to help, he is going to do it right.
Opening Jungkook's messages on his laptop, Yoongi almost wants to laugh at himself.
JK: [ killmepls.mp3 ] JK: is and OF thing, btw JK: don't listen to it in public lol
Yep, definitely Poducer Min equipment is too extra for this. But, fuck it.
The archive is already downloaded when he opens the software, starting a new project and naming it the same as the audio plus final, to not get confused. Plugging in his headphones he starts playing it, already noticing whoever this is, is pretty quiet at the beginning and he would most likely have to cut it off, still, he listens to make sure.
A few taps followed by a âhi..â is the start, and he chuckles at their giggles.
He decides to let that in, but cuts the next few seconds where only their breathing can be heard along with some clicking and fabric moving. Is too long of a pause for this kind of thing and the clicking gives a way they weren't ready to start. Sure they wouldn't mind.
They put music on? It sounds familiar but is pretty fade out, so he can't really be sure, and then âThis angle is kindaâŠâÂ
That's him.
That's his voice.
âHot,â the voice continues before he can rewind.
âYou can't tell me I'm mean anymore. I'm spoiling you,â his own voice travels again on his headphones. âI'm giving you this view and I'm giving you what's probably the thing you all ask the most: hands.â
What is this? Some kind of joke?
Did Jungkook put them up to this?
âI hate him. I'm gonna sue him,âÂ
That gets a laugh from him, even if he is still confused about what is happening.
Maybe it's just his imagination?
Should he ask his friend?
More movement of fabric. Maybe bed sheets or clothes. More breathing, a bit faster than last time and then, a groan.Â
He can leave that in.
Wait, that's right. He is supposed to be editing this. He has to go back andâŠ
âThis angle is kindaâŠâ his voice says and he hits pause. Is really him. Is that possible?
He feels like he is imagining things.
âJungkook, I swear if this is some kind of joke or something,â he rambles taking his phone out.
Yoongi: did you listen to it?
JK: no, didn't have time JK: why? something wrong? JK: don't tell me it can't be used JK: she is gonna be sad :(
Yoongi: who is she?
JK: dunno if i can tell youÂ
Yoongi: technically I'm doing a favor for her. I think is fairÂ
JK: good point JK: is afterhours(y/n)
He opens a new tap on his laptop, goes to the website and searches for the username through his followers. And sure enough there it is. Subscribed a month ago.
He clicks to see your perfil. The first post he can see without being subscribed is a picture of a lilac lingerie set on a bed with the caption âvery early birthday presentâ, from a week ago.Â
He considers subscribing to see more, but he stops himself from clicking, remembering Jungkook didn't even want to tell him who you were. Oh, shit. What would you do if you knew it was him editing your audio? Would you back out? Or be sad?
Now it feels kind of wrong, like if he were invading your privacy.
He clicks around on his computer again, audio track back to the zero seconds mark. He hears the âhiâ and the giggles and stops it before his voice appears.Â
âOkay, this is going to be posted. It was recorded with the intention of being posted for people to hear,â he reasons. âIf it's not posted I'd just forget about it and if it is⊠I'd⊠subscribe? To make up for listening?â
Clearly that part is not completely made up on his mind, but he doesn't have to decide what to do right now, he has to finish editing. And so, Yoongi clicks around the software again, cutting and deleting another section, the one where you can hear his voice and even his music before.
That's it. It was a familiar track because it is his. He composed that himself to put in the background of his videos exclusively. He figured putting his own touch would help if something was posted outside his page, never imagining hearing it in the background of someone else's video or audio was even possible.
It shouldn't affect him this much. After all, people touching themselves to his videos is half the reason he likes making them. What can he say? Is a turn on to have that effect on others, it builds his confidence up.
But actually hearing it is different.Â
Groan and fabric moving, a bit too close to the mic he considers doing something about it, but âI want you to touch me,â is the perfect whisper. Just the right volume, just the right words.
No more audio of SugaD can be heard now, you probably turn down the volume of the video or pause it. Yoongi is curious about it. The idea of your sounds being a reaction to his past self is doing things to him, and Yoongi would like to ignore them before getting too distracted, but is kind of a boomer not knowing exactly what your reactions are for.
Maybe he can open his video, it wouldn't be hard for him to synchronized it with your audio andâ
No.
That would cross the line. Is enough that heâ
âAre you hard?â your voice continues, timidly he thinks.Â
Is this your first time doing this? That's why you couldn't edit yourself?
What would you do if you knew he was listening and his dick was calling for attention at all your little sounds?
He stops your recording, considers taking a break, going back to bed. But he knows just forgetting about this would be hard and in the end he would have to come back and finish helping.
He unpaused it.
More moans echo throughout his headphones and he fixes them on top of his head, as if that would help him concentrate. You just sound so pretty, and when you plead he wants to give you anything you ask for, his dick twitching with desire.
He could justâ no. That'll be wrong. Is enough he is letting it affect him this much, he can't justâ
His leg bounces under his desk, hand glue to his mouse even when he is just listening now. Only stopping and going back a couple times to fix the volume of background noise, making it less or more obvious depending on the flow or your moans.
A groan of his own cuts the silence in his studio when you form words again. âIt feels so good, oh god.â And Yoongi wishes he knew what. Wishes he could see you, could touch you. Could make you sound and feel that good in person.
âUh uh,â short moans leave your lips, and it sounds so much like you're agreeing with his thoughts he really considers sneaking a hand down his pants. Allow his mind to wander and imagine what you would look like under him. Or on top. Or just coming undone by him.
But he doesn't. He just listens to your recording, your breathing, your pleas and your cut out warning when you cum.
âFucking hell,â Yoongi angrily whispers. And for a second he considers doing the SugaD special of cutting it out of the final audio, but that's too selfish.
Or perhaps is more selfish leaving it. Considering he wants the world to hear how you sound when listening to him.
Yoongi managed to leave the studio without touching himself. But is not really as impressive as it sounds since his hand is on his dick the minute he goes back to bed after listening to the final edit of your audio one last time. The excuse of being just to make sure is perfect is just that, an excuse. And your pretty sounds replay on his head while he jerks off until orgasm.
JK: thank youuuu JK: she says thank you too!
Does that mean you know he was the one editing it?
He opens the app on his phone, looks for your perfil again and debates a couple minutes his options.Â
What's the worst that can happen? You blocking him? He would understand, but if he actually doesn't do anything, doesn't play his chance, he wouldn't forgive himself.
And so, he subscribes. Page refreshes instantly and a new post greets him.
[ afterhours(y/n):
Surprise, surprise. Is my birthday month but I keep spoiling you, ain't I the best? đÂ
     [ VoiceReveal.mp3 ]
                                                                        ]
Doesn't even have to listen to it, his fingers move on their own, âthe cutestâ, he comments.
⥠Tag list: @m00njinnie , @sexytholland , @seoullove96 , @thelilbutifulthings , @disneyprincessshuri ,
( is hereee! I appreciate u guys hehe <3 ) ( if anyone else wants to be tagged in the future, let me know )
âȘ Part one. | âȘ Part three. | âȘ Updates for this verse | âȘ Ko-fi
âȘ Main masterlist. | âȘ Updates in general | âȘ Request & chats âĄ
#( writing. )#( reveal )#( reveal: editing )#min yoongi x reader#min yoongi smut#min yoongi fic#min yoongi fanfic#yoongi fanfic#yoongi smut#yoongi fic#yoongi x reader#bts x reader#yoongi x f!reader#yooglefics
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Wade would bully Peter bc someone said he would and wrote it happening and bc y'all are so boring and annoying. Fanfiction isn't about what's canon or strictly in character thats why they're called transformative works. I think y'alls weird obsession with what's cannon while also trying to heavily police what and how ppl make fiction is honestly been the death of fandom and creativity.
There hasn't been a large scale cross over in fandom in years that either wasn't completely ironic or torn down by bullies that it fizzled out bc y'all don't know how to have fun. Even that recent debate over how sans would react to his brother death is further proof of y'all's lack of understanding of interpretation and fan works. Fanwork are supposed to exist in the reality of the fiction of the person who wrote it. NOT what IS the right interpretation bc there are NO right interpretation except for what is made canon which can be anything bc WE aren't the creators.
Who cares what happens in the comics. The comic themselves don't care what happens in other comic runs unless it's specifically meant to be a spin off/continuation.
Wade is SUPPOSED to be a morally ambiguous character. I know y'all have washed him of all the ambiguity bc ppl have told you that how ur supposed to approach fiction and y'all can not perceive a protag who might not be the best person who ur also NOT supposed to hate (god forbid a protag not have Jesus adjacent morality) but thats what he is. He'll do whatever anyone wrote him doing bc he's not real and also anything thats morally ambiguous or toxic bc that's one of his character traits and what was supposed to set him apparent from other heros he's not even a hero he's an antihero. I can not believe y'all are moralizing something as tame as bullying. Bullies making up with their victims happens in DISNEY movies now y'all tryna make that into some problematic take. OMG. And this is from someone who WAS bullied briefly until I learned how to fight and stand up for myself.
Thinking that someone who romanticizes something morally wrong couldn't have possibly been through that experience is the direct antithesis of fiction. It also makes no sense. Plenty of ppl write from experience but also sometimes turning it into a story in which they control how they interact with a bully does A LOT FOR REGAIN CONTROL OF THOSE NEGATIVE EXPERIENCES. STOP TRYING TO SUS OUT WHO HAS TRAUMA OR NOT. also STOP thinking that you are an authority of certain traumatic experiences you aren't every experiences are very VERY personal and the portrayal of those experiences should have NOTHING to do with yours bc there is NO way to encapsulate all lived experiences. And even if someone hasn't been bullied who cares again decenter yourself from a fictional scenario that should in now way be a representation of you bc u are not the center of the universe.
(THIS SECTION UNDERNEATH IS MY HEAD CANON U DONT HAVE TO TELL ME U DONT LIKE AGE GAPS IDC)
Secondly wade only wouldnt bully Peter TO ME bc I'm not a teenager in highschool like some of y'all and highschool fics don't interest me and wade to me shouldne even be in highschool and always be the much older one in the dynamic. They shouldnt even be near the same age for me. But whatever floats ur boat. You can do whatever you wan't but when y'all make these long posts telling OTHER ppl what they can and can't do OR how you think YOUR interpretation of the character is the most right your crossing a line frl.
Edit: I read both Deadpool and spiderman comics btw plus the very wonderful spiderman/Deadpool run. GASP I know someone who likes the source material but doesn't adhere strictly to it bc I actually have an imagination and like to have fun instead of kissing marvels feet and remaining in a narrow interpretation of a character. A rare breed I guess.
Edit edit: I also think alot of y'all have a very romcom take on spideypool. And thats definitely fine love my fair share of fluff. But I have a much more complicated take on them. Again I think an age gap compliments these complications. It adds to an imbalanced perspective of both of them towards each other. I'm also very uninterested in a spideypool that grow healthy together or peter "fixing" wade. I want them to overcomplicate their relationship but for it to also be a healthy balance of comedic and fun and hot monkey sex that keeps them interested in a less than perfect relationship. A sorta push and pull from both sides.
#im tored of yall frl yall so annoying#discourse#Spideypool#spiderman#deadpool#wade wilson#peter parker#gall are just boring antis policing ppls fun for no reason#even something as tame as BULLYING has yall cruing and whining#proshipper safe
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this is probably stupid to ask, but do you like snape? or the marauders? there's always fanwars happening between marauders stans and snape stans. tbh i'm just curious where you stand (i like both, and prefer their canon selves rather than the fanon which is btw really stupid. they feminized sirius so much its not even sirius anymore.) what made you like snape? if you do, or are you neutral with him? just for a change of question since i always ask about harry.
Thanks for the ask! I don't think it's stupid.
I prefer their canon counterparts as well, the Marauders fanon has so little to do with canon I can hardly call the characters by the same name. They just aren't the same characters. Anyway, I'm gonna try and summarise my highly subjective opinions about them here.
1. Sirius Black
He's my second most favorite character and my favorite among the characters you mentioned. I wrote about him a lot on this blog, so I don't really feel the need to write more.
But, he's smart, resilient, and goofy on occasion. His love for Harry is one of my favorite aspects of his character because he loves Harry so much. And he has his flaws. He can be cruel, cold, and arrogant and I wouldn't like him as much if he wasn't visibly a member of The Noble and Most Ancient House of Black regardless of how much he tried to get away from his legacy. I love how messy his feelings about his family are. He left Regulus' room as it was, even though the rest of the house got cleaned by the Order. He stayed in his mother's bedroom even when all the conversations he had with her portrait were in screams. I love his distrust in Dumbledore after everything he's been through and how he chooses to remain for Harry's sake â he's willing to do anything for Harry's sake.
I just truly love Sirius.
2. Severus Snape
He's the next on this list because I do like Snape, he's not a character I'm passionate about, but I like him. I think he shouldn't be a teacher (I think he hates being a teacher more than his students hate him teaching them) but he's a talented potion maker and wizard. And he is a very entertaining character, even without knowing everything about him.
But what really makes me like Snape is that I find him interesting. I think his psychology is interesting, as is his dynamic with Lily, Dumbledore, and Voldemort. Snape is a fascinating character to study from a lot of angles, and even as a reader, there is quite a bit that's up in the air about him because he's that good at being a spy and not giving us anything.
The other major thing I like about him is his competence as a spy and wizard. If there's one thing I love in my fictional characters â it's competence (and intelligence). I often joke with my irl friends that Snape is the only competent Death Eater and the only competent member of the Order of the Phoenix. We then joke that if we were in his shoes, surrounded by a lot of people who don't actually do anything and we're the only ones affecting this war from both sides, we'd probably be bitter too.
A little note that seems overlooked about Snape often in the fandom, in general, is how we think, "Oh, he's so great at Occlumancy and not being emotional" â that's not strictly true. When it comes to Lily or the Marauders all his well-crafted Occlumancy kinda goes out the window. In books 3 and 5 he throws actual temper tantrums about Sirius Black. Like, I feel Snape, deep down is actually super not well adjusted and is an emotionally unstable mess, but he learned to pretend otherwise. Basically, all the cold facade is just that â a facade. He isn't really that stoic.
3. James Potter
I'm weird about James. Like, he's almost a nonentity and what we do hear about him is either negative or comes from biased sources.
I do tend to give him more of the benefit of the doubt than a lot of other fans who prefer canon James do. He was awful when he was younger, he was a bully and he assaulted Snape and there is no excuse for his actions. That being said, I can believe he changed. War changes you and you'd be hard-pressed to find a 21-year-old who isn't ashamed of a lot of what they did or said when they were 15. And yes, some of what James did is definitely more extreme than that of the average person, but it isn't that extreme compared to the environment he grew up in. Remus tells Harry everyone was casting Levicorpous on each other in the halls. I'm not saying any of the bullying is okay, I'm just saying it probably seemed normal to him and this is important context. Same as I don't think Snape is abusive towards students when put in the context of their culture and environment where, until recently, they caned students (Snape actually seems very averse to corporeal punishment. He also likely treats Harry very different than he does literally any other student, but this is the James section).
I just, like the idea of James changing for the better. I'd like to think he did. That life and war and loss taught him something.
4. Peter Pettigrew
Probably an unpopular opinion, but I like Pettigrew more than Lupin. He's awful, he's pathetic, he's a cowardly rat man and I find his sniveling funny. Whenever I try to think of a what-if scenario in my head, Pettigrew is somehow the key to it. Because he's a character that affects so much of the plot in some incredibly crucial moments â he betrayed James and Lily, he resurrected the Dark Lord, and later, he allows Harry's survival. Idk, I just find his situation and just how pathetic he could get fascinating. It's, like, there is no rock bottom for this guy, he keeps digging. Like, you can't get more pathetic than living as a rat for 12 years when you could've moved to Argentina or something.
And at the same time, he clearly has some residual care for Harry for his father's friendship. He has so many opportunities to kill Harry or kidnap him when he runs away to join Voldemort â but he doesn't. Even after Sirius escapes and he knows his time is up, he still leaves Harry alive. When he is supposed to kill him in book 7, he doesn't, he again lets him go and pays with his own life for it. Like, again, idk, it's just how I feel.
5. Remus Lupin
I know I placed Lupin last, and it's because I don't personally like him that much. Pretty sure this is a little controversial, but I don't really like book Lupin, he does not vibe with me, at all. (Though I'd choose book Lupin over Marauders fandom Lupin every time)
Like, it bothers me that he doesn't actually care about Harry (the only one on the list who willingly physically harmed Harry, in a moment of anger, but still). It was Harry who asked to be taught the Patronus, if it was up to Remus, he wouldn't be involved in Harry's life at all. He tried to run on his wife when she got pregnant because he was scared. Like, Petttigrew is given shit for being a cowardly Gryffindor, but, look, you need some guts to betray your friends, so I'd argue Remus is the most cowardly Marauder (it's easy to be brave when you don't care for your own life).
But, all of this is part of his character and the story wouldn't be what it is if Remus bothered to get his head out of his own ass and check up on Harry. How he behaves makes him my personal least favorite Marauder, but I want Lupin to be a cowardly guy who runs away from attachment and responsibility because he doesn't trust himself with anything (especially not anything good). He's not cool, or suave, and he's desperate for people to like him but without actually knowing him because he thinks that if they do they'd run away screaming like he wants to run from himself. Honestly, I don't get why the Mauraders fandom made James the people-pleaser when Remus Lupin is right there always telling people what they want to hear so they'd like him.
Again, these are all my own personal subjective opinions, but yeah.
#harry potter#hp#asks#anonymous#hollowedrambling#anti marauders fandom#the marauders#severus snape#sirius black#james potter#peter pettigrew#remus lupin
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(Different anon) I agree with and understand your points re: ~why you watch GMMTV if don't like??~ and why the question is/feels hostile.
But taking the question itself in good faith as "why do you (should I) keep watching shows I think/know I will not like based on how others have been handled?" in the genuine spirit of "explain like I'm 5 because I don't understand the lingo and background but want to understand the concept, how would you explain it to people not as into/knowledgeable/etc BL and the history of GMMTV?
Hi anon! This is an interesting question, because it depends so much on you as an individual and what makes you happy.
I think there is often a misconception that people who post critical meta are having a miserable time and torturing themselves with media they hate, but it's just not true. For folks like me who enjoy thinking critically, this is how we have fun. When I love something, I want to rip open its guts and see how it's all assembled. It's what stimulates my brain and gets me excited. And when I don't love something wholeheartedly, I am interested in figuring out why. I've often had the experience of watching something that I know should be working on me, and if it isn't, that creates an intellectual puzzle that I find very satisfying to solve. Why isn't it working, and what can that help me learn about storytelling? This is also fun for me.
Another misconception I often see in fandom is that if you like something, you can't have negative thoughts about it and you have to pretend it's perfect to be a good fan. Nonsense! Being a hater is fun, especially about things you truly love. I'll give you a really concrete example: Bad Buddy is one of my all time favorite shows. It first aired three years ago and I still think about it nearly every day. It's a show that stimulates my brain but also hits me straight in the heart. But I do not think it's perfect and I get a lot of joy from thinking about the parts that did not work (Wai's redemption, that stupid fake out in the finale, all of episode 9) and making fun of it (have you heard that PAT GOT SHOT??). This, too, is a form of love and source of joy.
So with those misconceptions addressed, why do I keep watching shows I suspect I won't like? First, because you truly never know until you try, and I like to be pleasantly surprised. Two of my favorite shows of this year, Cherry Magic Thailand and Knock Knock Boys, shocked the hell out of me. I went into CMT deeply skeptical only to be charmed against my will and so impressed by how they adapted it, and I went into KKB expecting it to be like 95% of weak Thai pulps only to realize its writing and themes were stronger than they had any right to be. If I stayed away from all media I thought I might not like, I would have never had the amazing experience of watching and discussing those two shows live with friends who also loved them.
Second, like I said above, I still have fun examining shows that are not quite working for me, and sometimes I am compelled by the ambition of shows even if I don't think the execution is serving. A great example of that is The Sign. I wanted to support that show because of who was making it, and it had so much early promise that when it fell apart halfway through, I stuck it out to try to make sense of what went wrong. In cases like that, I like to figure out what a show thinks it's doing, what it's actually doing, and where the disconnect is. It's a fun puzzle for me to sort through such an ambitious mess of a show. This is why, btw, I am never really moved by fanwanks to fill in gaps in story and characterization. I understand why others enjoy fixing shows in their brains and then pretending that's what they actually saw, but it's not what motivates me. My goal with shows like this is not to get myself to like it no matter what, it's to figure out why I don't like it and what could be changed to address that.
Third, I care about ql as a genre, and I like to be aware of how it's evolving and be part of the collective experience of watching it. QL fandom is tiny and I like to know what my friends are talking about! I can't watch everything because there is simply way too much content these days, but I like to watch or at least pay attention to most of the big buzzy shows to track trends and see what's getting the fandom frustrated or excited. I didn't watch We Are because I knew enough about what it was doing and who was involved to understand it was not for me, but I did pay attention to reactions to it. Watching Jack & Joker with Thai bl fandom right now is some of the most fun we've had since Only Friends killed our spirit. J&J is directed by my parasocial frenemy Tee Bundit, whose shows often frustrate the hell out of me and whom I have ripped to shreds on this platform many times over. But I'm not gonna let that stop me from having fun with this new show, because Joke is The Moment and we're all in this together.
So truly, anon: whether or not you should be like me and watch things you may not like or continue watching shows you don't think are very good depends on what motivates you. You should figure out what is most fun for you re: media consumption, and do that. You can seek out people who enjoy media the same way you do, and also befriend people who think differently if you want to learn from each other and don't mind a bit of productive discomfort from time to time. I have gotten better recently at recognizing when I'm just getting nothing out of a show and dropping it like a hot potato (because some shows are not bad in an interesting way, they are just bad), or realizing which shows I will like better on a binge (usually the ones with terrible pacing, that is not as tortuous for me when I can just watch it all in one go). You gotta do some testing to figure it out.
All of this has all been a really long-winded way to say you should do what makes you happy, and don't assume that just because someone else's happiness looks different from yours, that it's wrong.
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Do you ship it?- RPF edition!
Heya gamers- do you like rpf? If so, send in a ship and weâll see what others think!
Inspired by @do-you-ship-it-polls but not associated with them!
Also check out @new-proshipping-polls!
RULES
NO DISCOURSE REGARDING RPF ITSELF. If you donât like rpf, please just block this blog and move on with your day. I wonât engage in any discourse, but any hate sent to me will be deleted and anyone being a dick in the notes of a poll will be blocked. This is meant to be a positive space
This should go without saying but nothing pedophilic or involving minors in general. Also, no incest (Iâm personally uncomfortable with it but if you ship it yall are fine idc)
Originally I had a rule about no ultra-pieces of shit but then I started getting a lot of Stalin yaoi so honestly no rules anymore. Iâll decline things that make me personally uncomfortable tho
Regarding MCYT ships: Iâll be polling based on the content creators and NOT the characterized versions they play. If you ship the content creators, then send them my way! But if you just ship the characters, then donât submit them here
I literally always screw up when getting pictures or writing names btw sorry gang
I donât have discord so if you submit an image thatâs a discord link odds are I probably wonât be able to access it, so Iâd rather you use other image sources. If you really want to use that image and canât find another way, just dm it to me.
Also: the key word in âreal person fictionâ is âfiction.â In the end, we all need to acknowledge that these ships arenât real (and if the people in question are together irl, understand that their relationship is different than how it is in your head). These are fictionalized versions of celebrities and we shouldnât intrude on their personal lives by harassing them or their loved ones- especially their partners. No matter what side of the argument youâre on for rpf, just be civil and respectful and weâll all be fine!
SUBMISSIONS
And hereâs the google sheet for this blog! Submissions in green have been posted, submissions in grey are posts that have been queued, submissions in yellow are ones with an image link I canât access so are on hold, and submissions in red are ones Iâve rejected for any reason (the last column is one Iâve added to explain why). This is manually updated by me, so donât expect this to be accurate 100% of the time.
#poll blog#shipping poll#rpf#real person fiction#rps#real person shipping#not a poll#do you ship this rpf ship#mod talks#not not a poll but not a main poll
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i wanted to write something else in regards to diasomnia, and you could say twst in generalâin fact you can consider this a part two to:
but today i wanted to talk about one thing in particular:
mages, ( or at least fae ), and them being a minority group
* iâm treating these as different but connected subjects btwâseparated by a header. youâll see it, trust. el oh el.
more below the cut!
thinking about my last post, i came to the realization that i didnât exactly specify what i meant by fae being a canonical minority raceâother than of course sebekâs ordeal as a canonically mixed character. so for starters, letâs dive into that.
( there will definitely be b7 spoilers, but itâs necessary!! plus itâs restricted to liliaâs dream, so donât worry about outside of that. )
while iâm not a fan of yana, i can admit she did an AMAZING job in realistically depicting the oppression the minority races face in twst.
you can refer to this thread:
but iâll also be explaining it myself. fae go through a lot throughout the game, and iâm surprised people donât think about it more often.
the vargas event sheds a good amount of light onto how fae ( specifically pixies ) are treated, which is basically dog water. their home is basically getting invaded whenever the event occurs, and each time the students are essentially being tasked with kicking them out, especially in the instances where you see how the students canât understand what the pixies are saying due to the language barrier.
you can also refer to the fairy gala event, where the students sneak into the gala to retrieve the mage stone used for the fairy queenâs tiara. and here..sam basically admits to possessing fairy dust illegally, which is explained to be a source necessary for fae survivalâwhich basically implies thereâs fairy dust trafficking occurring in the world of twisted wonderland.
( by the way if anyoneâs curious, this is occurring on chapter four of the fairy gala event ).
we even see these sorts of things outside of eventsâcrowley keeps fire pixies in the fireplaces of nrc as a heating system, a cheap power supply.
not to mention..apparently, itâs normal to be taught how to summon them for them to do menial labor FOR you.
( * i honestly donât get how people side with humans knowing all of thisâŠeither you missed them ( werenât able to get to certain events ) or are late to the fandom, all of which is understandable,, or you just didnât read. also brings me to another reason why sebek hating humans is understandable, el oh el ).
now moving on to the bit that involves the book 7 spoilers, which i believed i addressed in the first part, actuallyâthe fact that in liliaâs dream, the fae are actively being colonized as they fight in a war against the humans. reminds you of how in real life, white people were jealous of pocâs rich land and therefore wanted to take it, no? honestly i get disgusted thinking about why people would ever have a reason to like or side with henrik. fae are effectively the minority among the minority ( like bipoc, considering theyâre basically what the âiâ stands for, indigenous people who had their land being stolen by the white colonizers. honestly, itâs very obvious people who side with humans in twst donât know anything about our real world history at all ).
also, like how the thread i mentioned before talks about, thereâs other things with reflect how the minorities of twst are treated: in the first halloween event with the magicam monsters, malleusâs horns are tugged on and compared to bike handles ( and i know itâs not meant to be intepreted that way but i worry about how fans do, considering how fae age works and heâs a minor, but thatâs a post for another day. if you guys want to hear it, i wouldnât mind ). the reason this being something to note is because horns are live bone, based on dragon anatomy. they have feeling in themâso when thereâs a significant amount of weight on them, it hurts.
also, nocturnal species having virtually no assistance from the school ( after all night classes are never mentioned ), octopus merfolk, hyena beastman, etc., are considered lesser. like i said, the thread is good to look at if you want more, but anyway.
( i have realized that this post is getting a big lengthy, so iâm using a header ( banner? ) to cut it up a little..patooey! not to be mean, but this is sometimes me when people purposefully are ignorant to these things. )
anyway, we now move on, finallyâto mages in general and why i consider them a minority group as well, even if theyâre definitely not on the scale of the fae race.
i understand where people may think that things like this arenât just numbers. but thereâs a reason why itâs referred to as âminorityâ and âmajorityâ. i,, kind of thought it was obvious if you took any math class ever, but whatever. i mean even if youâre white, if you were in say, japan, youâre the minority compared to the majority which are asians/japanese in specification. i will NEVER act like white people should be considered a minority group in GENERAL considering world history ( reverse racism isnât a thing, i reccommend looking at this. itâs a myth really ), but it is literally statistics. plus, even white people can be discriminated against, and i can admit this as a person who is bipoc ( but letâs be real you cannot be racist towards white people ).
anyway, back to twst. no matter how you look at it, mages are a minority group given the literal statistics given to you in game. only 10% of the human population hold enough magic to even lift a cup, basic level. we donât know the percent for other races, but this is still a very telling statistic in the rarity of mages, thus making them what i call themâa minority group.
now iâll say this; fae are born with magic, and fae have magic ingrained into their society ( plus they donât even have experience with modern technology ), itâs a part of their day to day life, though as i mentioned before, seeing as theyâre the minority among minorities especially considering the human-fae war mentioned before, that just affirms that fact that mages are to be considered rare. ( plus itâs mentioned again in b7 humans greatly outnumber the fae, and even in the world map you can see briar valley is small ).
something iâve noted and will say right nowâthe fact there are mages that belong to high society doesnât automatically mean theyâre not a minority/not oppressed. like, consider actual human history. can nobility/royalty, major world leaders not be a part of an oppressed society? african leaders, mexican leaders, etc, all who are people in power, world leaders who were oppressed by colonizers and killed. being someone in power doesnât mean youâre not oppressed. not to MENTION present day celebrities and people in power ( i mean look at meghan markle ).
itâs true, while i say âthere are magesâ, you can look at twst to see that a majority of them are actually well off. but personally, i see this as a fact when we look at mages, weâre focused on night ravenâwhich is quite literally a PRESTIGIOUS and PRIVATE academy meant for mages who are the cream of the crop. of course weâre going to be presented with many mages who possess power at least even if just influentially. also, of course weâre going to be shown how mages are perceived in society comfortably. weâre in a place where mages are the majority attending night raven as the prefect, though this is about in general to the world, so thereâs that.
also, the idea that non mages are the ones being marginalized against, i kind of doubt it. i think thereâs a clear reason why, at the very least, it would be happening inside night raven. remember how i said white people can be discriminated against, just never be racist against? i think thatâs whatâs happening here, given the way riddle acts with the prefect and the fact they had a magicless upbringing in book 1. while mages are the minority in general, in night raven theyâre the majority. so among the mages we see, of course itâs easy to interpret it as non mages being the ones suffering the most in twstâs society. but i donât see it that way, especially since unreliable narration exists, like with fae vs humans.
( yk how like, restaurants based around a specific ethnicity will give people not of that ethnicity a different menu with higher prices? when mages discuss magic levels, i feel like this is the equivalent el oh el )
( and anyway, that argument clearly falls apart when you look at ruggie.. i can see him fading away right now.. a large part of his character is that he and his village are in poverty if that. wasnât obvious. if he can belong to a prestigious academy like night raven but still be in that kind of financial state, there are obviously mages who go through the same, he was just the lucky few to manage to make it into nrc. )
also, before society became accustomed to mages. again looking to the human-fae war, there was a large period of fear where rather than mages, they were referred to as âwitches and wizardsâ. i donât have much to emphasize there, but there having been a period of fear like that is rather telling.
while i understand mages have a special place in the workforce ( i mean fourth year students at night raven go off-campus for hands-on learning and to go job hunting ). but also..i think thatâs pretty obvious given how magic is a very important resource even still among twisted wonderlandâs society. after all, henrik was mining briar valleyâs resources without permission, and since one of faeâs must valued resources involved the fairy dust mentioned earlier ( aka magic based ), even though mages were still feared at the time, itâs clear that magic itself is and back then was still valued even so ( i mean obviously, who wouldnât want magic..which brings me back to the fact of colonizers wanting pocâs rich lands and such ). itâs just now in present day twst society, mages are considered âequalâ. ( riddle mentions that their current society has âgrowingâ diversity, so i can only guess things still need change ).
which is ALSO why i donât think rollo was right about magicâŠuhm..because you know, fae rely on magic to live. their day to day lives. if exterminating magic means basically also exterminating a raceâŠi donât know you guys i donât think thatâs right!! sweats!!
but, anyway..thatâs the wrap up of this rant. if you want to ask questions, brings things up to me or anything, i donât mind comments!! just like..be respectful yk, heh.
#inside kayâs mind#kyupidos#twst#twisted wonderland#disney#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#book 7#twst book 7#diasomnia#twst diasomnia#twisted wonderland analysis#twst analysis
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