#They're so polycule its insane

[theperrylleluniverse]

Lest you think the rest of the aftermath of Della calling Clay a misogynist wasn't also hilarious.

[ruvviks]

it's been a hot sec since i've talked about cyberpunk and i was initially working on a fic that would tell the story of this whole thing, but i've abandoned it many months ago and cannot say when i'll be picking it up again SO! i've decided to instead make this timeline. sorry in advance for how much information is in this thing the cyberpunk extended blorboverse essentially refers to the story parallel to the in-game events of cyberpunk 2077 that @mojaves and i came up with. we don't really have a better name for it but at this point the term has been used so many times that i feel like everyone here knows what it is by now, but at the same time we've never really explained the full scope of what the story is by now (it's a lot sorry). so in an attempt to get you guys a little bit more up to date with it all, here's a semi coherent timeline that describes the core events of the story and every branching story that came out of it! for additional background information, you can check out the following posts (timeline 1 / timeline 2 / timeline 3) to catch up with the continuation of the in-game storyline that's referenced in this timeline, but it's mostly irrelevant to everything here save for a couple of referenced events that cross over between the stories. it all ties together very intricately sorry about that. don't worry too much about it i've included my taglist down below to make sure people who are interested won't miss this post, but feel free to skip over this if it's not your thing! won't be doing a lot of this kind of stuff in the future but i'm trying to get back to the cyberpunk roots so this is kind of like, a good starting point and reference point for later posts!

The story starts in early 2077 and is centered around Sebastian Vidal, gang leader of the Cobras and previous test subject of Arasaka Special Programs (the linked page is a lot of information but gives the most coherent overview of what the branch actually is). The current director of the SERPENT projects, Andrew Colton, and Dr. Alana Cartier, both want him dead, to tie up their last loose end before the rest of Arasaka can find out and shut down Special Programs once and for all.

Over the past months they’ve been hiring various assassins in secret, to try and get Seb killed; however, these assassins keep failing, and their latest attempt lies in the hands of Cassidy Shaffer, an ex-corpo turned assassin with a strong moral code and plenty of experience to his name. With little to work with, as his mysterious client doesn’t give out much information, Cassidy starts with what he thinks is gonna be a quick and easy job– but he ends up hunting after Seb for essentially a year.

During this year, the two men have a series of wild encounters that get more and more insane the longer it goes on; it includes, but is unfortunately not limited to, Cassidy biting off a chunk of Seb’s ear, the two of them running over the highway, the two of them getting handcuffed together and chased by the NCPD then hit by a car right in front of the hospital, and Seb sensually licking blood off Cassidy’s face after having stabbed him when Cassidy wanted to strike at a concert Seb is visiting.

All of it comes to a sudden stop when Cassidy learns his client has been lying to him the whole time, and since he does not appreciate lying clients he ends up jumping sides and teams up with the Cobras to do some cleanup duty in Arasaka Special Programs. He and Seb work together to go after a list of targets to get the still ongoing projects mostly to a halt, while remaining in the shadows themselves as to not draw too much attention their way; and during this collaboration they meet several people from their past, bringing back both good and bad memories.

One of these people is Hanan Chisaka, the Head of Security at Special Programs. She ends up becoming the next test subject of Project Cobra after the last successful subjects, Xavier and Gabriel Mason, end up escaping in the midst of the chaos of Hanako Arasaka’s capture in mid-2077. Once Seb’s best friend and Cassidy’s mentor, she’s now forced to hunt the both of them down; but in their final confrontation she snaps out of the controlled mode Arasaka keeps her in and runs away with them, effectively leaving Special Programs without any test subjects. Another one of these people is Reid Bennett, Cassidy’s ex and ex-coworker back at MaxTac. He still works for the corporation and has been on an ongoing investigation into Arasaka Special Programs; seeing Cassidy alive and well, working together with Seb no less, piques his interest and he continues to look further into the case, which will cause him to make a very big mistake later on in the timeline.

By September 2078, Seb and Cassidy have successfully taken down all their planned targets and retreat back into the shadows, leaving Special Programs with many losses and no test subjects. With the APEX program discontinued a month earlier (incident discussed in this fic, which is a continuation of the in-game events), and Hanako Arasaka recovered and ready to take the corporation back from the hands of her corrupt brother, Special Programs ends up having to retreat for the time being, and cook up a new plan in the background.

Special Programs by this point is run by Andrew Colton, Alana Cartier, and Kaida Akiyama, three players who have been in the game for a long time already in the SERPENT projects’ runtime. Colton and Cartier are married– Cartier used to be married to Seb and cheated on him for a good amount of time when he was still at Arasaka– but their marriage is starting to fall apart. Akiyama has had to watch over Special Ops agent Ambrose Hawthorne for a while during his chase after the Mason twins, which ended up with the twins dead and Hawthorne going into early retirement (Arasaka doesn’t know the twins faked their death and Ambrose is now dating one of them lol), and xe is now determined to help Colton and Cartier get Seb back into Arasaka so the projects can continue.

Cassidy’s initial plan was to leave as soon as the collaboration would come to an end, but he has found his place with the Cobras and instead ends up officially joining them.The next chapter in the story is a more laid-back and easygoing chapter, in which Cassidy learns to be part of real life again, and in which Seb learns to let people get close to him again after spending years trying to convince himself he doesn’t need any help. Over the course of a little over a year (all the way to November 2079), the two grow even closer than they had already done, going on gigs together and, you guessed it, slowly but surely falling in love until they inevitably end up together at the end of it.

Not long after the two get together, Reid returns into Cassidy’s life. He wants to try and be friends again and Cassidy gives him a second chance, though this soon enough turns out to have been a mistake, with Reid trying to create distance between Seb and Cassidy and then going as far as trying to sell Cassidy to Kang Tao (one of the few corporations that have been hunting Cassidy down for a while now) in exchange for his own freedom from MaxTac (where he would have otherwise been stuck at for probably the rest of his life). Naturally, Reid can’t watch Cassidy get tortured for long and leaks his location to the Cobras, who find and free Cassidy and take Reid into captivity instead– he does not get killed, but instead has to sit out some time at a safehouse somewhere in solitude, where he gets to decide what kind of person he wants to be in the future.

This brings us to Elysium; a gorgeous spaceship which was supposed to be a relatively cheap escape from reality for everyone who wanted a refreshing break from Earth, but through Arasaka sponsorship has become just another cash-grab project to compete with the Crystal Palace– and considering the megacorporation has its greasy hands all over it, the secret labs in the spaceship are used for a series of very unethical experiments. Naturally so, it would be the perfect place for Colton to continue his SERPENT projects without the risk of Hanako Arasaka finding out and shutting the place down. He sends forces up to Elysium (obviously after his other attempts at relocating the project to space have failed tremendously, having lost contact with every single crew in the smaller Arasaka stations in orbit around the planet), but since he’s not there himself his cousin (one of the CEOs of Elysium), Maxwell Crane, unbeknownst to Colton, takes control of the SERPENT projects in space instead. From the earlier linked Special Programs page: “Project Eryx used the technology of previous projects, but took a completely new approach in the hosts it used; rather than focusing on the human psyche it attempted to create a new type of cyborg which would lack the humanity that caused previous projects to fail. The Cobra chips were no longer used and the software was instead installed directly onto the host’s mainframe. The flexibility of the new hosts– more robot than human, and in some cases the entire human aspect was lacking altogether– allowed for experimentation with highly advanced cybernetic enhancements and military grade tech and upgrades, turning the test subjects– dubbed ‘prototypes’– into dangerous, unstoppable killing machines.”

Things settle down for Seb and Cassidy, but this moment of peace does not last long. In January 2081 the two find themselves traveling to the spaceship Elysium, to investigate a curious situation in the laboratories– they’ve been hired by Arasaka without their knowledge and it’s a setup to get Cassidy killed and Seb back in Cartier’s control.

While in space, they learn that the secret labs have suffered an outbreak of the above mentioned prototypes. They quickly connect the dots and realize Special Programs is back in the game, and they work together with security guards Aubrey Valentine and Leon dello Russo to try and fix the situation before it gets out of hand. Obviously this fails tremendously and Elysium ends up on a complete lockdown after a ship-wide outbreak, which is eventually contained in late March of that year, with CEO Maxwell Crane dead, leaving only his wife Kinsley Osborn behind.

Elysium continues to exist and is rebuilt after the crisis, and Kinsley Osborn can now finally turn it into the retreat it was always meant to be. Previously, most Elysium employees were to be stuck in space for the rest of their lives; however, with Arasaka out of the picture they are free to leave as they please, which results in a gigantic cut in total employee count in the months that follow.

Seb and Cassidy return to Night City and take Aubrey and Leon with them. Aubrey reunites with his sisters; Becca, James, and Rikki, and soon after his return to the city he opens an LGBTQ+ nightclub called Bodytalk with them, found Downtown, City Center, in June 2081. Not only is it a fun place to hang out at, it’s also his main hub as a fixer, and he starts a collaboration with the Cobras to get business going between the gang and the club; and soon enough it grows into a large and powerful network of connections, which is the foundation on which the rest of the stories are built.

After this point in time, many many more things happen but it would take me another hour or ten to go into full detail of all of that, so instead here’s a quick rundown of some of the other things that Bodytalk gets involved in:

Reid Bennett is handed over to Aubrey and he starts working at the club, and he becomes a very valued employee as well as a good friend to many now that he’s no longer fucking insane

Kaida Akiyama returns from Elysium and shows up to Hanan’s doorstep, to ask for her help with getting out of Arasaka for good; much later on, xe starts working for Bodytalk as well, in an attempt to put xyr past behind xem and become a better person

Urban Dynamite starts performing at the club regularly, and it becomes their home base

Luna Serratos, Cassidy’s ripperdoc friend from all the way back to killing era, gets involved in the Harbinger case from Maelstrom (one of the gang’s most feared members); turns out the Harbinger is in fact Reuben de la Rosa, a by then 22-year-old kid who has ended up in Luna’s care with his friend Noah Telavera after the two got caught up in an explosion. She requests the Cobras’ help with getting Maelstrom to let Reuben go

Officer Michele Diaz from Militech (who used to be Cassidy’s boss) is demoted following the lawsuits after the Elysium incident, and her investigation into the incident in hopes to get her job back leads her to Bodytalk; she begins threatening them and sends the whole club and their allies into uncertain times

Many people get married. There’s so many fucking guys here we went a little insane with the numbers but there’s several weddings and there’s a whole polycule going on too feel free to send asks about this if you’re interested

Cobra Cybernetics releases a new line of cyberware, which is incredibly buggy and dangerous to the public; it’s brought to the club’s attention and it makes them realize that Luiza Vidal (Seb’s sister), who not that long ago asked them to kill her husband (William Colton (Andrew’s brother), CEO of Cobra Cybernetics), has gone missing; they now need to get involved without getting the news out that they actually didn’t kill William and that he is still alive somewhere, while also balancing out dynamics between Biotechnica (angry at Cobra Cybernetics for stealing their designs) and Arasaka (the actual reason why Cobra Cybernetics’ designs look like Biotechnica’s designs, because William stole designs from Special Programs after halting their partnership after the Elysium incident, but these designs had been stolen by Arthur Jenkins from Biotechnica even BEFORE that to be able to hijack the European Space Council’s cybernetics following the Frankfurt incident. Are you still with me)

Vitali Dobrynin (fixer and main character from the in-game events storyline and the continuation of it; Vincent “V” Mayer’s boyfriend) ends up visiting Bodytalk after meeting Aubrey at a Fixer Council meeting, which happens in late 2083; this essentially ties the two main storylines together, which means that yes, a lot of the characters from the two separate storylines end up meeting :]

Officer Ulysses Dimakos (used to work with Reid at MaxTac) is sent to investigate Bodytalk following the Cobra Cybernetics scandal, and ends up teaming up with the club to get MaxTac on a dead trail in exchange for his freedom of the corporation

On top of the Bodytalk / Cobras centered storyline, there’s a couple of side stories that are still connected to the whole thing but are more of a standalone thing with only a few touching points to the rest of it all:

This obviously takes place a lot earlier because it’s already mentioned above, but Special Ops agent Ambrose Hawthorne is tasked with chasing after the escaped Mason twins; naturally he lets them go and ends up going into retirement, and Xavier Mason later on ends up becoming Bodytalk’s part-time repair guy on account of knowing Kaida

Gabriel Mason ends up in a car crash with retired security specialist Ames Ortega, who was also in Elysium during the incidents there, and the two end up babysitting Ambrose and Xavier’s kids together while those two are helping Hanan with getting Kaida out of Arasaka (Are you still with me. Blink if you can hear me)

Mercenary Frankie Sayyad gets a promotion from his fixer, Vulture (real name Diana Crane, Maxwell Crane’s older sister and cousin of the Coltons), and becomes one of her Bloodhounds; he works together with Evelyn Harris, Nimue Nkuna, and Beckett Rydel, the latter being one of the very first test subjects of Arasaka Special Programs, and the four accidentally get themselves mixed into a mystery concerning their secretive fixer

Caleb Harris, ex-security at Biotechnica, ends up back at Club Bodytalk not long after the conclusion of the Cobra Cybernetics scandal, and starts working for Aubrey; he is partnered up with Ramiel Al-Masri, a mercenary who has been working for Vitali Dobrynin for a while and has recently joined Aubrey’s mercenary roster too, and together they dive into a series of gigs neither of them had expected

Journalist Bodhi Shankar has finally found more evidence and information surrounding the mysterious cult gang Umbra and its so-called Prophet, Thiago Salazar; however, his antics have led to him accidentally becoming part of the gang himself, and he has to figure out a way to get Thiago to stop listening to the supposed deity that the gang worships known as Scintilla, before she makes him do things that will get many people killed

taglist (opt in/out)

@velocitic, @deadrlngers, @euryalex, @ordinarymaine, @gurathins;

@mojaves, @shellibisshe, @dickytwister, @mnwlk, @rindemption;

@ncytiri, @calenhads, @noirapocalypto, @florbelles, @radioactiveshitstorm;

@strafethesesinners, @fashionablyfyrdraaca, @aemondtargeryen, @radioactive-synth, @katsigian;

@estevnys, @elgaravel, @aezyrraeshh, @carlosoliveiraa

[br1ghtestlight]

inanimate insanity is gonna end w/ mephone deciding he's going to end the cycle of abuse and then there's a heteronormative compilation of mephone meeting his Beautiful wife (identical copy of mephone except she's pink and has eyelashes) and having three kids and a dog and living in a home with a white picket fence. we never hear from mepad, toilet or any of the contestants again. mephone is straight. THE END

[19871997]

.

[gay-carmy-berzatto]

i love seeing iasip shipping discourse bc its literally fucking sunny

we're talking about it's always sunny in philadelphia and ur getting upset about macdennis or charden or smth

theres definitely nothing else in this show to talk about except which men kiss

[yellowocaballero]

i very much enjoy the extremely scientific analysis of the naruto verse in which there are three genders, aka naruto, sasuke, and Woman.

AM I WRONG? AM I WRONG? pulls down projection screen and plays powerpoint

Obviously let's give room for nuance. A ton of Naruto characters don't fall into these gender norms. This does predominantly apply to the rampant proliferation of the three-person dynamics that were assigned by the government and dictate your entire life. And, like, society. It does not end. Gender isn't a biological factor in Naruto, it's a social dynamic constructed entirely by your homoerotic tension with other men. And there are so many.

Madara (S), Hashirama (N), Mito (W). Izuna (N) and Tobirama (S) - tragically, Izuna died before women could be invented. Sarutobi (N), Danzo (S, horrifically) - see above about women not being invented yet. Jiraiya (N), Orochimaru (S), Tsunade (W). Yahiko (N), Nagato (S), Konan (W). Obito (N), Kakashi (S), Rin (W). Shisui (N), Itachi (S), that little deeply unimportant girlfriend (W). Um, fucking, Naruto (N), Sasuke (S), Sakura (W). Even - even, fuckin, Rock Lee (N), Neiji (S), Tenten (W).

And what do they all have in common????

(OT3. They're all OT3s. Is what I'm saying).

There is some room for alternative gender expressions here, like being butch or femme. Naruto gender expressions: teacher, otouto, woman who you can't even tell is woman gendered because she has no backstory but you just have to kinda assume that she has a polycule-based backstory where she was Woman Gender. I feel almost as if 2/3rds of the Rookie 9 are liberated from this. InoShikaCho just doesn't fit (their chaotic cousin energy is just too strong and Ino's too much of a lesbian). Hinata's too busy being defined entirely by a different throuple's N to have codependent dynamics with her own N and S (and I'm hesitant to even say that, since I actually don't know if Kiba and Shino have a codependent rivalry - do they?).

I get, like, the reason for all of this. Curse of Hatred. Cycles. N and S Genders being sourced from demigods or something. Narrative parallelism. Sympathy points. It's not the bad guy's fault he's evil, his N and W gendered counterparts died :(. But an extremely strange side-effect of this is that all of the male characters are, like, Just Naruto or Just Sasuke. But the vast majority of the female characters are - like, completely defined by the men in their lives - but also they are more likely to be a unique person. Mito, Sakura, and Rin have actually nothing in common. Writing so sexist it creates more interesting characters?!?!

Unironically, this is why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the ship of all time, nothing will ever top it, you will NEVER do it like Sasunaru, etc. Every important relationship in the series is meant to evoke Sasunaru. (Notably, none of the explicitly romantic ones. But we're beyond such paltry understandings of the most iconic pairing of all time as fundamentally based in romance. We're operating on a higher level than that). This unbroken chain of toxic yaoi has culminated at the end point of Sasunaru, and it exists to parallel Sasunaru and define their relationship by the dysfunction of generations of tragedy. That's why Naruto has to consciously break the cycle and free them from the generational hate - it was the only way to save Sasuke. This is also why I'm always saying that Sasunaru is the point of Naruto, and that the entirety of Naruto is about Sasunaru. Come back to me when your work has invented new genders in the all-encompassing pursuit of toxic yaoi.

This also means that the only truly gender non-conforming individuals in Naruto are its mightiest heterosexuals: Minato (W) and Kushina (N). Truly insane. The N/S/W configuration is the societal norm, it's bonkers to make a major good-aligned male character a wifeguy. By Naruto standards Minato and Kushina are the only queer couple.

[skythealmighty]

why am i just now finding out about thisisnotawebsitedotcom i feel a little stupid.. then again i dont have the Book of Bill so maybe im lucky to know about it ???

#rocket talk #gravity falls #miss this show. anyway twink cipher fuckign jumpscared me

(3 notes)

👓 the-nerdiest-glasses Follow

Why Flatland counts as an object show: an essay

Keep reading

🔧 warp-pipe-sfx Follow

Why Flatland does NOT count as an object show: a rebuttal

Keep reading

⛓️ chainsaw-massacres Follow

why flatland isnt an object show: its a book + movie you assholes

#this argument is fucking stupid its just flatland

(3,821 notes)

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020 asked: Im going to tear apart your circuitboard until its broken irreparably

🌈 super-rainbow-epic-computer Follow

lol ok have fun w that 👍

also do u know any recipes for roasted pumpkin seeds the internets failing me rn and im cooking a big dinner for me and my bf

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020

Oh yeah sure https://www.jessicagavin.com/how-to-roast-pumpkin-seeds/#wprm-recipe-container-35845

🔘 join-my-evil-polycule-deactivated08142020

Wait why am I telling you this go die I hate you

🌈 super-rainbow-epic-computer Follow

thx for the help!

☝i-date-iconic-posts Follow

Date of origin: November 3rd, 2021

(216,025 notes)

❌ mephonex-deletes-your-favs Follow

~~Welcome to MePhoneX deletes your favs!!~~

I'm mod Xav (the only mod rn - -"), here to cause trauma to your favorite characters :)! PLEASE keep in mind that submissions will take a while to get to, because I have to photoshop out the limbs + background or even completely recreate someone's object if they're transparent!

The background flag is in the header and the X (recreated from an image of MePhoneX) I overlay on top is the profile picture if you want to make your own :) just @ this blog and I'll reblog it!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~❌~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RULES ABOUT SUBMISSIONS:

NO INANIMATE INSANITY CONTESTANTS. I would like to avoid Apollo's Dodgeball thanks (plus it's insensitive)

No algebralien or algebralien-adjacent characters! I love those guys too I get it but I honestly don't have a good method of 'deleting' them planned. Feel free to do it on your own time though!

If someone asks me to take down a submission with them in it I will do it without questions. This is for a variety of reasons, but I think you get it.

Alright, that's it! Have fun :)

#not xed out #mod xav #pinned post #your fav is #your fave is #mephone #mephonex #inanimate insanity #ii2 finale

(681 notes)

📁 sticky-note-hit-post Follow

has anyone else wondered why this spaghetti code webbed site can connect across DIFFERENT UNIVERSES??? or is that just me

(2,416 notes)

🦀 thesamepictureofbaxtereveryday Follow

follow for the same picture of my crab every day!!!!! look at him :D

(3 notes)

anonymous asked: greeny how does it feel to be technically a higher being than most other people on the site

🟢 greenyguy Follow

sir this is a wendys

#i didnt order an existential crisis today :(

(37,102 notes)

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

todays liveblog!! B)

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

knife and suitcase made it to the finale!! hell yeah so proud of them

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

balloons talk with suitcase didnt go so well :/ i hope they can get some alone time without anyone else so they can like talk properly next time

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

mepad???

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

oh i think the finale challenge is happening

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

baseball looks worried but lightbulb's brushing him off :|

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

ojs backing away from paper??? wh

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

WHJDT THE FUCK

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

WAIT I HAVENT SEEN SOAP IN A WHILE WHERE IS SHE???

🎤 screamintothemic Follow

OH GOD

#mics ramblings #SOAP???!??

(11 notes)

anonymous asked: evil woman are so hot <3 i will do whatever you want queen

🌐 dr-who-could-never Follow

Awwww, this means a lot to me, anon! Could you find Film Reel for me and doxx him? That would be really helpful <3

#He's been evading me #It's really annoying #Hard to take over the world when I have to worry about him 🙄

(6 notes)

🥄 only-a-spoonful Follow

WHY DO I KEEP GETTING SENT ASKS ABOUT PREGNANCY?!

#I'M GOING TO QUIT TUMBLR AT THIS RATE.

(47,284 notes)

📗 journal-of-secrets Follow

if this fuckass hand keeps showing up at the edge of my vision i'm going to hit something

📗 journal-of-secrets Follow

#maybe hes in love with you

what the hell is wrong with you.

[chipperchemical]

it's time for my annual insanity arc, so here is every hermit/traffic ship that i actively enjoy and 1 headcanon for each one! (worth mentioning that i love most ships, these are just my favourites)

Grian x Mumbo (Grumbo) -> Grian is the only one who can bring Mumbo out of his redstone hyper-focus mode by cooking him unnecessarily gourmet meals and pretending to be sad when Mumbo doesn't instantly sit down to eat with him.

Grian x Scar (Scarian) -> When Scar's in his wheelchair, Grian will run around while pushing him and sing the Mario Kart star song at full volume.

Grian x Bdubs (Gridubs) -> They have a STRICT nighttime routine and if anyone interrupts then they will never hear the end of it.

Grian x Doc (Gridoc) -> Grian keeps bringing different animals home and Doc keeps trying to say no, but every single one grows on him eventually.

Grian x Mumbo x Scar (Mumscarian) -> Mumbo keeps trying to convince the other two to eat redstone, but he's only successfully convinced Scar.

Bdubs x Doc (Bdoc) -> The absolute embodiment of the sunshine/moon trope, but Doc is the sunshine and Bdubs is the moon.

Bdubs x Etho (Ethdubs) -> Etho likes trying on dresses and skirts and gives Bdubs little catwalk fashion shows.

Bdubs x Impulse (Impdubs) -> Extremely sweet to each other while destroying their enemies.

Bdubs x Keralis (Kerdubs) -> They spend every Sunday eating cereal and watching a movie in bed.

Bdubs x Mumbo (Bedstone) -> Mumbo's fast food order is always incorrect and Bdubs is the one who has to ask the worker to correct it.

Bdubs x Zedaph x Impulse x Tango x Skizz (BZITS) -> The ONLY thing that makes them all chill out after hard days is a massive cuddle pile in their nest of blankets, pillows, and stuffed animals.

Cub x Scar (Cubscar) -> When they're close to each other, their eyes get slightly bluer and their prankster urges get stronger, like a physical biological change.

Cub x Doc (Docub) -> They constantly dress up as Dr Frankenstein and Frankenstein's Monster for Halloween, and they switch who is who every year.

Doc x Etho (Detho) -> Doc leaves little gifts and bouquets around Etho's base, but Etho either doesn't see them or has zero idea who they're from until Doc brings it up.

Doc x Ren (Rendoc) -> The fathers of the server.

Doc x Joel (Doel) -> They are the most stubborn and competitive couple to the point that the others can't tell if they're on the verge of breaking up or not -- they never are.

Doc x Zedaph x Impulse x Tango x Skizz (DZITS) -> They regularly smoke zaza together and bake brownies.

Etho x Joel (Smalletho) -> Their only petnames for each other are vicious insults.

Impulse x Skizz (Skizzpulse) -> Impulse doesn't typically like touch, but Skizz's hugs are so warm and comforting that he doesn't mind one bit.

Impulse x Zedaph x Tango (ZIT) -> Tango and Impulse have amazing body heat while Zedaph is always cold, so their cuddles are the perfect temperature.

Impulse x Zedaph x Tango x Skizz (ZITS) -> The other Hermits figured out that they were a polycule after extreme confusion over why they all kiss each other.

Impulse x Tango x Skizz (ITS) -> Impulse and Skizz both use Tango as a heat pack for their wings and chronic pains.

Tango x Jimmy (Ranchers) -> They're both the absolute best gift-givers and always give each other the perfect presents.

Skizz x Tango x Jimmy (Jizzango) -> Jimmy goes non-verbal sometimes so they all know sign language and are experts at Charades.

[drdemonprince]

woof. your recent posts really resonate with me especially now that im making more gay and trans friends, im meeting so many cool nonmonogamous trans people that seem to have casual sex with basically all their nonmonogamous trans friends and like. its almost giving me a complex where if i think someone is cool and want to be friends with them, even if im not attracted to them, i have a perception that the only way to befriend them is to pursue them sexually. or that if they dont wanna fuck me when they fuck all their other trans friends that means there's something wrong with me (again even if i don't particularly want to fuck them!)... i love being trans and poly, and i love having more trans and poly people in my life, but sometimes i think about this one reddit comment where a dude said he noticed his gay friend had way more fun at straight bars than gay bars bc at straight bars he wasn't worrying about his appearance/body image/validation/sexual prospects

yeah honestly i get this so much and it's a very dismaying swirl of emotions to have. i don't like fucking friends. at all. it actively makes me feel unsafe and like i'm only useful to someone insofar as i'm satisfying a desire for them. it makes me feel more disposable. plus im insanely jealous if i have an actual emotional connection with someone i'm fucking so i wouldn't do well in a whole poly queer mish mosh of dear devoted friends who also sometimes bang. i would be plotting the downfall of the people i was most primed to view as a threat and sowing discord between people and shit. not good.

i also think it is a little fucking concerning when people only date/have sex as their sole way to make friends, and are only friends with people they want to fuck. this tends to create a very homogenous friend group that is heavily restricted based on desirability politics. it's also just really objectifying and unsustainable.

now i must say!! this is very much in the minority of poly people -- poly people are generally fucking AMAZING at being friends because even as just their buddy they treat hanging out with the same degree of intention and care as they would going on a date. they can hang! they want to go out and do things! they're more practiced in building a new intimacy of *any* kind than most monogamous people are.

it's just that there are some weird culty up their own ass bad boundaried polycules out there, in the same way there are abusive, codependent, jealous, miserable fucking monog couples.

but even tho most queer and poly people are more ascended than that, yeah, there is a weird unsettling constant self-evaluation that can happen in spaces where fucking almost anybody is theoretically on the table. some of that is a problem in how people treat one another, and some of that is just insecurity in between your own ears.

i get it fully. im hyper conscious of myself and how i imagine im being perceived and how people are seeing me when im out in queer spaces. and most of it is me being fully insane and making myself miserable based on nothing. because literally who cares who is attracted to me in that space and who isn't??? what matters is what i want in that moment, and my behavior, which i have control over. i should be able to just float around smiling at people and dancing and chit chatting and if someone is feeling my energy and we can talk, great, if they try to make it sexual when i dont want it to, i can just walk away. like it fully does not need to be that deep.

but it's a hard internal hurdle to overcome and every time someone hits on you, ignores you, misreads your identity, etc it can be used by your mind as fodder for The Narratives and The Insecurities and make things worse and it really has to be an intentional practice to not do that to yourself.

if you can bounce along carelessly in the straight club because you're not worrying about how people see you, you can bounce along carelessly in the queer club and not worry about how people see you. literally treat queer people the same way you'd treat straight people who seem perfectly fine but are not your problem and not a focus for you. you can stop trying to mind read the intentions of every queer person and stop sizing yourself up in their eyes and not worrying about who is fucking who and who is in love with who and who is secretly jealous but pretending not to be. and just. hang out. and feel things out. and exist in your own body and pay attention to what interests you and what you are experiencing rather than how they are experiencing you.

i say this as a reminder to myself!!

[caligvlasaqvarivm]

ok im not going to tag this but i need you guys to know that my endgame ships for eridan and karkat are

eridan ♦️ karkat

eridan ♥️ roxy

roxy ♦️ calliope

eridan ♠️ calliope

karkat ♥️ calliope

i call it "the polycule only a blood player could love" and although it manages to be perfectly healthy, from the outside, everyone looks like they're cheating on everyone else. nepeta is staring at it going ":33 < dodged a fucking bullet!!!"

Eridan ♦️ Karkat

the ship with the most canon backing. this ship needs to be true before all other ships can be true because it keeps the two of them normal enough to have a shot at romancing anybody else. nobody realized they were pale for each other for an embarrasingly long time because their regular day to day conversations feature slurs and death threats. sometimes looks pitch or flushed from the outside because karkat is a mess who can't stop yelling at people he's trying to romance in the red quads, and because eridan gets really needy sometimes.

Eridan ♥️ Roxy

They get together within five minutes of knowing each other and, despite Rose's protests, never ever break up. Eridan is into cute, pink, bubbly, nice girls, and Roxy is into eccentric troubled princes. Not to mention she fucking loves wizards, and Eridan is a wizard, and that they're both hipsters who use rifles. Also Eridan is weird as hell and Roxy thinks he's hilarious for it. Despite the fact that he puts on this unpleasant, nasty act, he'll pretty much do anything Roxy tells him to, and she likes that. She thinks he has himbo energy. Everyone else thinks she's deranged. Like girl that guy is an insane murderer. Girl he will not stop saying slurs

also their specific abilities are diametrically opposed in an interesting way? prince of hope = can destroy anything he believes he can destroy, rogue of void = can create anything by stealing away its nonexistence. neat!

Roxy ♦️ Calliope

since they aren't trolls and don't need to calm each other down, it's not really a proper moirallegiance, but they're bffffffs and the kinds of silly fun-loving gals who would call their friendship a moirallegiance even if it doesn't have the biological components or serve the social function of one. Two girls that just love each other.

Eridan ♠️ Calliope

biologically, cherubs only engage in pitch romances and are attracted to other cherubs that remind them of the other half they lost in predomination. what i'm saying is that calliope - unfortunately for her - has brother issues. initially put off by eridan's superficial similarities to caliborn - his bluster, his riflekind, his insane logic and thick skull, and how damn often he talks about murder - as they get to know each other, the feeling becomes mutual. eridan is generally totally ok with outright hostility, but calliope's faux-nice smugness when taunting an opponent would drive him nuts, as would the earnestness with which she approaches magic (what kind of POSER needs to RELOAD their WAND), and in general, i think he'd take her genuine well-wishes toward other people as a personal affront, a la "i didn't ever need anybody to look after me!"

they somehow have a 50/50 win ratio at the board games they play, which drives calliope nuts. "believing in your pieces" is not a valid chess strategy!!!!!!!!!

also i think it's fun and thematic, the angel killer and the cherub, whose adult form features hope-shaped wings.

Karkat ♥️ Calliope

We know two things from his crush on terezi: the first is that karkat is into clever, cunning gals, and the second is that he's really fucking messy, the kind of guy who would tell his flushed crush to "set the table on his bone bulge for their candle light hate date." Fortunately, or unfortunately??? for calliope, the fact that he will scream obscenities at her is kind of what she's into. everybody, please, a moment of silence for calliope, who somehow manages to have worse taste in men than roxy.

but yeah more seriously, karkat has a big and loving heart, and so does calliope, while calliope maintains a cleverness and intellect that karkat would be into.

normally, it would be a huge problem for your moirail to be pitch for your matesprit, and we have that both ways here. however, a few factors are mitigating that here. first, eridan will always prioritize karkat or roxy over calliope when they're around. this actually does kind of piss her off, although she feels annoyed that it does. second, calliope is generally mature enough to compartmentalize. third, karkat WILL auspicetize if they aren't careful, and nobody wants that. and fourth, everybody wants to keep roxy happy.

but yeah everyone else watching it is like. are you guys okay? blink if you need help

ofc ship what you want to ship this is not at all me telling you what you should be into. im just saying that these ships have been calculated for Maximum Funnyness, which as we know, is the only objective measure for what makes a good homestuck ship

[mcytshipsandmore]

*faceplanted on the floor kicking my feet because I'm actually going kind of insane about them*

ETHO X LIZZIE, DONT KNOW THEIR SHIPNAME BUT LIKE *vague gestures* YA KNOW

Why are they so cute, like aaaaaaaahhhhh, to me Etho seems scary but is actually just a weird little fella and Lizzie seems really sweet but could kill you instantly if she really wanted to. They're both equally as awkward as eachother and that awkwardness is ampted up by 300% when together, its adorable

This started out as a dynamic in my Etho Joel Lizzie Cleo polycule but even them on their own is just so cute

Gonna go read as many ao3 fics as I can find about them bye

lizzie: I get why Joel is obsessed with you now.

Etho: aw :)

-🍫

[rotting-ink]

I’m curious are there any RO’s who are exclusively monogamous or are all them fine with a poly relationship?

SO!

L Rawlins: Old fashioned, doesn't really like poly. Doens't like open relationships either. They're ride or die and not sharing.

S Della Rovere- Yep! Into poly! Just no one in the cast has captured their attention as much as the Witch and would feel like they would be showing A LOT of favouritism towards the Witch. Would need someone they have been friends with and can be close with while obviously being heads over heels for the Witch. Any other time? Happy with a polycule.

Z Chambers- Fully hasn't heard of any of it before and a bit confused by it, until meeting Starling and the Witch. Loves being poly then. Two people that mean everything to them and they get to be all together!

V De Winters- Very good with Poly and in some cases prefers it to monogamy. Quincy was always going to be deeply important to their life and they were always worried that their partner wouldn't be able to take the pressure of Quincy being around as much as they are. Also V finds themself somewhat lacking so very grateful for another partner to help them take care of everyone.

Seir- Weeeelll.... It would be more of an open relationship where its obvious Seir is way more into the Witch than anyone else. Very monogamous for the Witch, but if they ever met someone who intrigued them the same way as the Witch does, would think about it.

Saleos- Somehow both deeply possessive and profoundly open for more partners. But not in the poly way. More like concubines who share the same level of access to them. Then comes along the Witch and they are all forgotten. Then insanely monogamous and obsessive.

Starling Knight- Doesn't mind poly in the least, as long as they're at least friends with the other person. Like with Z, they would slowly develop feelings if things were meant to be. But is happy to keep it monogamous.

A Lancaster- Weirdly, starts out very monogamous. To be fair, they belong to an organization that doesn't allow romantic relationships etc. They don't have a lot of soft spots for people around them, but when its on the same level as affection for D Woolf and the Witch, then it actually makes them relax their own rules. They allow their own poly relationship because they are very close to D and doesn't want them hurt, so they both date the Witch, which, in turn, leads them to discovering their own gentle feelings for D. They're super flexible like that.

E Rawlins- Nuh uh. Nuh UH. NO. MONOGAMY, YOU TWO WILL DIE AT THE SAME TIME, BURIED IN THE SAME COFIFN, NEVER BE PARTED ARF ARF ARF- Oh? Share you with a close personal friend? Maybe. The only people E would ever think about sharing the Witch with by Book 3 is S (even though their friendship is a bit rocky), Saleos and Quincy, even though it won't happen. (Also would still be tumultuous as fuck as the one vying for their attention the most and kicking the other one AWAY) They're obsessed with only the Witch.

Quincy Beaumont- Was way way way more used to open relationships and affairs. Their poly route with V and the Witch is the first one in their life, and they're happy for that. With anyone else, they'd be unsure of it, but in their defense, no other romantic relationship was ever going to be as deep as it becomes with the Witch or as loving and accepting as the one they share with V.

D Woolf- Actually, very poly. Can feel his relatives and family screaming at them for being a disgusting sinner from across the water. Having a support system like the one they have with A and the Witch has done wonders for their nerves. Open to both honestly.

[scummy-writes]

The hurricane went by me, but ended up going through and hitting where my family and friends live. My family is fine despite some issues in town, however the town they live in mainly just got hit on the side. But my best friend, who I've known since we were children, lost their home and car. They lost everything that they didnt bring when they evacuated.

Obviously, I am preoccupied trying to help them out, but realistically all the roads near them got damaged and I can't GO there and help them, and it will likely be Weeks until I can.

They have food and water and they're in a safe place with their polycule. So instead I'm focused on building up some stuff for them for when this calms down a bit, like homegoods and similar. I'm hoping FEMA will help them too, even if its limited.

All of this to say that I am stressed. Understandably so, I hope!!!!! I don't know what this will mean for writing, honestly writing is a stress reliever despite how I talk about it, but I may just be too busy for a little bit. Or, when I have downtime I'll go insane and write a lot.

I want to like. Apologize in advance if I seem Very Fucking Odd in the upcoming weeks, like sounding frazzled or sporadic posting or really odd fanfics/writing quality decrease/etc. At the end of the day its my blog so like, i'll post whatever, but like. Still. I'm not very worried about writing stuff moreso than accidentally misreading tone more often than usual.

I may end up uh. Stopping the @ikemen-daily-questions too? Unless i hit some sorta zen moment and write out a buncha new qs and fill up the queue for a while. Idk im not thinking too hard about it right now.

Edit: gonna queue this to post a few times

[lloydfrontera]

I am sooo tempted to read the novel just so I can write a fic with Lloyd and Javier in a happy relationship with a mutual benefits agreement with Alicia and Silluria (who are of course also in a happy relationship) with the right characterizations.

honestly. that's such a fun dynamic. putting all of them in a happy polycule resolves so many issues at once and gives us such insane possibilities. i am now obsessed with this concept.

but also i'm bi so like. in my head. this is their arrangement.

lloyd and alicia get married so he can have the tax benefits of being the royal consort and she can get rid of the annoying people that say she needs to be married and have someone to make an heir with, but he still lives in the frontera estate and they see each other every weekend when alicia gets visitation rights to yongyong because they share custody of him. once charlotte is born, she alternates between spending two weeks in the palace, one with only alicia and the other with both alicia and lloyd, and then one at the frontera estate with only lloyd.

as for why javier and silurian get married it's mostly so she can also get rid of the people who think that if she's her father's heir then she should at least be married so she can have an heir of her own. and well they spend a reasonable amount of time together, when they meet in the capital while accompanying their respective lovers so. yeah why not. they have two babies, the eldest a namaran and the youngest an asrahan, who spent two weeks at the palace, one at the frontera estate and then visit their grandfather at namaran one week every two months.

all four of them are Stressing™ about all those trips and poor yongyong and ggoming get so much work out but they're committed to giving their kids the chance to get to experience everything they have to offer them. but also they run a tight schedule and trying to organize anything is a nightmare, they get the hang of it eventually but the first couple years were An Ordeal.

everyone in court pretends not to know about their arrangement but it's really hard when the royal consort only spends two weeks out of three at the palace, bringing and taking with him lady namaran's husband, while lady namaran lives almost permanently in the capital with the queen.

that and also all three kids call alicia 'mom', silurian 'mama', lloyd 'appa' and javier 'papa'. so like. it's an open secret.

the facts its rumored that more often than not lord frontera and sir asrahan will share a room, while the queen and lady namaran have rooms next to one another, that may or may not have a secret passage between them and that more than once all four of them have been seen going in and out of the royal chamber is really not anyone's business either.

i do want to say this does not solve the fact that lloyd emphatically did not want to marry into a position of power and that silurian had a whole arc about not needing to marry, but. it is much funnier and gayer than the original ending so i'm a lot happier ajksdhjkahfkjds

of course this is just. what came out of my brain once you oppened that possibility ajskdhjkafds

please do try it out your own way, i'm sure you have some truly wonderful ideas!!! please. give us gays everything we want <333

[dirtytransmasc]

random avatar hc's cause I'm bored. (these fall closer to canon, and not for one of my au's, so like... vaguely 'normal' spider, not so nice neytiri, etc. unless specified otherwise)

spider and tuk are besties. the way she sorta hides behind spider when she blows a raspberry at lo'ak? she knows he'd take her side in a fight. spider will never tell her she's "too big" for anything, he literally works out partly because he wants to be able to carry her for as long as possible. he goes out of his way to play with her when her siblings ditch her. take whole days to just follow tuk around and do what she wants to do. she made him a songchord and goes to sit with eywa with him so he won't be alone. doesn't get why people don't like him, cause she thinks he's the best. so she tries to make him happy when they're together. pisses neytiri off, cause she always wants to spend time with spider, even when she tells tuk not to (it makes spider sweat bullets, cause tuk refuses to let go of his hand and neytiris just glaring at him, and he almost wants to beg her to let go)

ao'nung is also tuks best friend. they bully each other, but get offended if anyone insinuates they don't like each other. she's still mad at him for being mean when they first met, won't let him live it down, even years after the fact. braids his hair all. the. time, he can't get her to stop touching it.

even outside of my blessed spider au, spider has connected with eywa, cause she accepted him no matter what, he just doesn't tell anyone. she knows how to connect to humans now, via her roots, so she connects with the boy. he feels like if he points it out he'll get in trouble or he'll be 'using eywa' to get what he wants (which isn't true, but the boy has some irrational fears cause ✨trauma✨)

ao'nung and rotxo 'dated' as kids, like schoolyard crush type dating, cause they were really young. it lasted a few years (on and off) from like 6ish to 10/11, but to this day, they're still very close. like, its odd to find them not touching each other or cuddling or holding hands. they're inseparable and have no clue what personal space is, at all. they still say "I love you", kiss eachother's cheeks/foreheads, ao'nung is possessive, roxto is always talking about him. they're platonic they swear (not a soul believes them).

neteyam doesn't want to be chief, sometimes he hates being jakes son because of the weight on his shoulders, but he doesn't complain cause he doesn't want to be a disappointment, and he doesn't want to watch his siblings struggle to carry the weight themselves.

spider self soothes by brushing a thumb over his own cheek or running his fingers through his hair or holding his own hand. he's so insanely touch-starved its not even funny.

he's also a maladaptive daydreamer. I got no solid reason, it just feels right. gotta deal with his loneliness and metric ton of big feelings in one way or another.

he also feels the urge to talk to himself, a lot, especially when he's out alone in the woods. he just happens to think the ato'kirina are a coincidence (eywa listens to him attentively like a mother should).

spider tends to 'ignore' signs of eywa when it comes to himself, because he can't accept that eywa would ever wish to connect to or guide him. (its a running theme in my hc's)

after sorting out their drama, ao'nung is really close to lo'ak. after neteyam's death he sorta becomes his big brother. their dynamic is a mess, but they make it work. ao'nung is sorta like a punching bag for lo'ak a lot of the time (like hopper and mike in that one scene in season 2 of stranger things). ao'nung hates watching him mourn (he wishes he had died instead. for more then one reason, but that's a big one). other times they're super sweet on each other, play roughhousing, just hanging out, lightly teasing one another. they're my messy boys.

kiri refuses to pick between spider and rotxo. they don't mind. polycule for the win.

spider isn't immediately accepted by the metkayina, but he tries really really hard to prove himself, and does make some sort of name for himself. they may not all like him, but they respect him.

spider learned to treat bullet wounds after having to sit behind neteyam, staring at the bullet hole, and not knowing what to do. he blames himself for neteyams death, but he thinks that if he knew what to do, if hadn't frozen, if he'd known what to do, maybe he would have lived.

ao'nung has a disproportionate level of big brother instinct, relative to his general asshole personality. he's insanely protective of anything smaller them then him, even if he himself hates it. aka, even before he accepted spider into his friend group, or the village as a whole, he was instinctively protective, embarrassingly so. still kicks himself for getting lo'ak hurt (he meant to scare the piss out of him sure, but he never wanted him to get hurt) and he genuinely cringes, one of those full body shakes type cringes, when he thinks about it. he hates its.

spider doesn't know how to properly show affection after always being denied it, having to suppress it (not being able to affectionate with the other sully kids in front of the elders), etc. so now he sorta just struggles. the sully kids don't really notice how he hides his affections, how he's timid about it, what he considers to be affection. the metkayina kids are not used to it, they are genuinely concerned. spider is genuinely afraid to be nice to people when not in private. he's deathly afraid of receiving affection in front of others.

tsireya and ao'nung (sorta rotxo too, but he's dating him, so its kinda different) forcibly adopt him after a while, they can't help it. he's like a kicked puppy, its hard not to love him.

roxto's grandma (who raised him, canon, cause i said so) and all his brothers and sisters (he has a big family, mostly adopted siblings,) love spider, so he has a little makeshift family.

spider would, whether he was accepted as one or not, become a warrior after what happened that night in the forest (getting kidnapped) and what happened on the ship/to neteyam. he won't let himself be taken off guard again, he won't let the people he loves, even if they don't love him back, get hurt again. he vows his life to the na'vi, to pandora, to Eywa herself; he will die before he loses someone else.

spider and lo'ak orange cat energy, kiri and tuk have tortie energy (sassy queen), roxto is a tuxedo cat, ao'nung and neteyam are black cats, tsireya has tabby vibes (sweet but sassy). (fight with the wall)

[akaikali]

TMAGP EP 16 REACTION (SPOILERS)

CELIA HOLDING ALICE HOLY SHIT MAN THE SAMALICELIA POLYCULE IS GOING SOMEWHERE I also think this might be Celia's instinct to comfort from being a mother maybe??? BUT ALICELIA FEELS. My God their ship name could be a palindrome. Insane.

DEAR LORD DID ALICE SEE HER PARENTS DIE???? MY POOR GIRL.

Tape recorder is gone??? And yeah I suspected that the woman had been dead the whole time. Something was using her as a mouth piece, maybe something relates to ep 11 with the deep??

I think Celia and Sam saying they believe Alice is gonna bring them closer. I know people are sus of Celia so it could be a ploy to get closer to the OIAR employees, but I don't know, with her disliking Lady Mowbray, I'm more inclined to trust her.

The fact that Alice says "paid my horror dues" makes me think she knows more about said horrors and is working at the OIAR specifically to avoid it. Were her parents killed by The Horror?

"I think there's plenty of it go around at the moment" Yeah she's talking about Lady Mowbray. Seriously, I have respect for Celia, she really stood her ground last episode.

Man the fact that we were like "omg what if Alice's phone call ends up being a statement!!" In a serious way meanwhile Alice is like "yeah no Freddie will probably spit out in a few days so nothing to be concerned about". What if. Tho. Gwen ends up hearing the phone call. That would be interesting. Speaking of, where is our corporate girlfailure.

Sam you awkward little bean I love you. I'm sure Celia and Alice just gave him the fondest, "You're such a dumbass" look.

SOCIAL MEDIA INFLUENCER TIME????

OH NO. OH NO FUCK AM I GOING TO FALL IN LOVE WITH INK5OUL. THEIR VOICE.

I'm sorry I now understand what Alex meant when he said this episode was social-cringe-horror. The misuse of AAVE is actually so accurate please help my I'm on the floor screaming this should not be this funny-

Damn so does Ink5oul tattoo....pain or something? I don't have a tattoo myself (yet. I'm gonna get one. As soon as I stop being squeamish about needles. Oh. Needles.) But I don't think they're meant to hurt THAT much???

...I genuinely SHOULD NOT like Ink5oul this much. Please. You cannot do this to me I cannot have a Michael Part 2.

OH MY GOD ITS A YOUTUBER DRAMA VIDEO IM GOING TO FUCKING DIE I CANNOT BE LAUGHING THIS HARD.

I'm sorry THE SITUATIONSHIP FUCKING SENT ME YOU'RE TELLING ME INK5OUL IS IN A SITUATIONSHIP WITH A GOTH GIRL INFLUENCER PLEASE RUSTY QUILL I NEED TO BE SERIOUS I CANNOT DO THIS.

OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD I CANNOT DO THIS I HAVE PAUSED 7 TIMES NOW JUST BECAUSE I WAS LAUGHING TOO HARD TO KEEP HEARING. INK5OUL IS HOT AND A GOTH CONFIRMED.

Shut up. SHUT UP. NOT FUCKING DIG. ARE YOU SERIOUS. NO WAY.

Also let me add all the video sound effects are taking me out I LITERALLY cannot do this PLEASE-

OH MY GOD. WAIT. IS THIS WHEN INK5OUL WAS LOOKING FOR THE BODY WITH THE TATTOO FROM EP 11. HOLY SHIT.

"Hell no i ain't gonna call it in" girl by making the video you are basically calling it in what the fuck

THE YOUTUBER DRAMA IS TAKING ME OUT PLEASE THIS IS SOME NICOCADO AVODACO VS STEPHANIE SOO TYPE SHIT (Stephanie Soo all the way honeyyyy).

So...Does Ink5oul have the ability to make people feel pain through the tattoos they do? It's seeming like that's the case.

"The views are cutting me" HUH???? THATS. LIKE. THE EDGES ARE CUTTING ME??? WHAT IS HAPPENING??? HELLO?????

IS SHE DYING. THATS HORRIBLE RN WHAT THE FUCK ALICE LITERALLY JUST SAW SOMEONE DIE NOW SHE HAS TO HEAR SOMEONE ELSE DIE????

Okay wait now that Sam has let go of his "be professional" bullshit I'm back on his track SAMALICELIA LETS GOOO

THERE SHE IS THE CORPORATE GIRLFAILURE

Ohhhh Lena. Oh boy. I can understand her tbh, Gwen has no idea what's happening and she's just doing her own thing. Whether she's evil or not, Lena still knows better what's going on and can avoid unnecessary risks. Especially since Lena does seem to care if other employees get hurt.

I SEE HOW IT IS GWEN. SO YOU'LL BE HORRIFIED BY MR. BONZO BUT NOT OF THE CANNIBALISTIC HUNTING WOMAN BECAUSE SHES A LADY OF THE ARISTOCRACY. CLASSISM AT ITS FINEST. I HATE MR. BONZO BUT AT LEAST HES A WORKING CLASS...CLOWN MONSTER THING.

Okay so the Externals are like. A Thing here. Kind of like avatars? I'm not saying in the sense of fears, I mean they're beings that are not human anymore and possibly dangerous.

Wait but I understand Gwen though "You can't take this away just because I did something you never bothered to tell me not to do" this happens to me so much Gwen my babygirl you are So Autistic.

I saw someone say that Gwen needs to be dommed. I cannot say I disagree, especially when Lena tells her to sit down. Anyway we're gonna move away from that thought.

I am not joking. I paused a total of 17 times throughout this episode because I started laughing too hard. I think I have a new favorite episode.