#love how this started super fluffy and sweet and just got progressively angstier. ended it on a sweet note though

[dirtytransmasc]

random avatar hc's cause I'm bored. (these fall closer to canon, and not for one of my au's, so like... vaguely 'normal' spider, not so nice neytiri, etc. unless specified otherwise)

spider and tuk are besties. the way she sorta hides behind spider when she blows a raspberry at lo'ak? she knows he'd take her side in a fight. spider will never tell her she's "too big" for anything, he literally works out partly because he wants to be able to carry her for as long as possible. he goes out of his way to play with her when her siblings ditch her. take whole days to just follow tuk around and do what she wants to do. she made him a songchord and goes to sit with eywa with him so he won't be alone. doesn't get why people don't like him, cause she thinks he's the best. so she tries to make him happy when they're together. pisses neytiri off, cause she always wants to spend time with spider, even when she tells tuk not to (it makes spider sweat bullets, cause tuk refuses to let go of his hand and neytiris just glaring at him, and he almost wants to beg her to let go)

ao'nung is also tuks best friend. they bully each other, but get offended if anyone insinuates they don't like each other. she's still mad at him for being mean when they first met, won't let him live it down, even years after the fact. braids his hair all. the. time, he can't get her to stop touching it.

even outside of my blessed spider au, spider has connected with eywa, cause she accepted him no matter what, he just doesn't tell anyone. she knows how to connect to humans now, via her roots, so she connects with the boy. he feels like if he points it out he'll get in trouble or he'll be 'using eywa' to get what he wants (which isn't true, but the boy has some irrational fears cause ✨trauma✨)

ao'nung and rotxo 'dated' as kids, like schoolyard crush type dating, cause they were really young. it lasted a few years (on and off) from like 6ish to 10/11, but to this day, they're still very close. like, its odd to find them not touching each other or cuddling or holding hands. they're inseparable and have no clue what personal space is, at all. they still say "I love you", kiss eachother's cheeks/foreheads, ao'nung is possessive, roxto is always talking about him. they're platonic they swear (not a soul believes them).

neteyam doesn't want to be chief, sometimes he hates being jakes son because of the weight on his shoulders, but he doesn't complain cause he doesn't want to be a disappointment, and he doesn't want to watch his siblings struggle to carry the weight themselves.

spider self soothes by brushing a thumb over his own cheek or running his fingers through his hair or holding his own hand. he's so insanely touch-starved its not even funny.

he's also a maladaptive daydreamer. I got no solid reason, it just feels right. gotta deal with his loneliness and metric ton of big feelings in one way or another.

he also feels the urge to talk to himself, a lot, especially when he's out alone in the woods. he just happens to think the ato'kirina are a coincidence (eywa listens to him attentively like a mother should).

spider tends to 'ignore' signs of eywa when it comes to himself, because he can't accept that eywa would ever wish to connect to or guide him. (its a running theme in my hc's)

after sorting out their drama, ao'nung is really close to lo'ak. after neteyam's death he sorta becomes his big brother. their dynamic is a mess, but they make it work. ao'nung is sorta like a punching bag for lo'ak a lot of the time (like hopper and mike in that one scene in season 2 of stranger things). ao'nung hates watching him mourn (he wishes he had died instead. for more then one reason, but that's a big one). other times they're super sweet on each other, play roughhousing, just hanging out, lightly teasing one another. they're my messy boys.

kiri refuses to pick between spider and rotxo. they don't mind. polycule for the win.

spider isn't immediately accepted by the metkayina, but he tries really really hard to prove himself, and does make some sort of name for himself. they may not all like him, but they respect him.

spider learned to treat bullet wounds after having to sit behind neteyam, staring at the bullet hole, and not knowing what to do. he blames himself for neteyams death, but he thinks that if he knew what to do, if hadn't frozen, if he'd known what to do, maybe he would have lived.

ao'nung has a disproportionate level of big brother instinct, relative to his general asshole personality. he's insanely protective of anything smaller them then him, even if he himself hates it. aka, even before he accepted spider into his friend group, or the village as a whole, he was instinctively protective, embarrassingly so. still kicks himself for getting lo'ak hurt (he meant to scare the piss out of him sure, but he never wanted him to get hurt) and he genuinely cringes, one of those full body shakes type cringes, when he thinks about it. he hates its.

spider doesn't know how to properly show affection after always being denied it, having to suppress it (not being able to affectionate with the other sully kids in front of the elders), etc. so now he sorta just struggles. the sully kids don't really notice how he hides his affections, how he's timid about it, what he considers to be affection. the metkayina kids are not used to it, they are genuinely concerned. spider is genuinely afraid to be nice to people when not in private. he's deathly afraid of receiving affection in front of others.

tsireya and ao'nung (sorta rotxo too, but he's dating him, so its kinda different) forcibly adopt him after a while, they can't help it. he's like a kicked puppy, its hard not to love him.

roxto's grandma (who raised him, canon, cause i said so) and all his brothers and sisters (he has a big family, mostly adopted siblings,) love spider, so he has a little makeshift family.

spider would, whether he was accepted as one or not, become a warrior after what happened that night in the forest (getting kidnapped) and what happened on the ship/to neteyam. he won't let himself be taken off guard again, he won't let the people he loves, even if they don't love him back, get hurt again. he vows his life to the na'vi, to pandora, to Eywa herself; he will die before he loses someone else.

spider and lo'ak orange cat energy, kiri and tuk have tortie energy (sassy queen), roxto is a tuxedo cat, ao'nung and neteyam are black cats, tsireya has tabby vibes (sweet but sassy). (fight with the wall)