#The first person to die is gay
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"Its bury your gays because a character struggling with internalized homophobia/repression comes out and is happy and then dies at a later time" first of all, thats whats not bury your gays or internalized homophobia is. Second of all, Stede Bonnnet is right there and also still alive and happy. You know. The main character you are supposed to care about and be invested in?
#Its not like Im not sad or that the guy hasnt grown on me#Its that I just care a lot about words and terms being used correctly#Bury your gays is like#The first person to die is gay#only gay people die#HIV/AIDs as a punishment for being gay#not “guy who happens to be gay among an all gay cast dies”#Also this was the man who called edward a “namby pamby in a silk gown pining for his boyfriend.”#did we just like... forget how fucking homophobic that was?#Using other queer people as a receptical for your own self hatred isn't internalized homophobia#It's just homophobia.#And there's a section of the fandom who /relate/ to this guy?#I mean. I get it. Character growth. Improvement. Sopping wet meowmeow.#But#I was severely bullied for basically all of school for being queer and gender expansive#If I found one the people who called me a faggot in highschool had come out#I would be fucking PISSED#like. Good for him that he discovered stuff and improved. I feel bad for what he went through#is the fact that he was in a shitty situationship supposed to be an apology for all the shitty stuff he said and did?#Certain parts of the fandom sure treated it like it was and you know what#It kinda sucked seeing fans say that the show doesn't have homophobia when it very much does#It's just that the homophobia isn't the focus. So it doesn't feel like trauma porn.#Anyway I'm glad Izzy finally apologized to Ed. That's the bare minimum. I wish Ed could have apologized to Izzy more but like#how do you even properly apologize for taking a man's leg? “sorry. That was wrong of me (obviously). won't happen again (I sure hope not)#ofmd spoilers#ofmd season 2#ofmd#ofmd s2#ofmd 2#our flag means death spoilers
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Forsan miseros meliora sequentur
#yeah no good things will come he gon die but the quote is still cool#fnv#fallout new vegas#arcade gannon#legion#legion be like no gays and then puts cock and balls on their flag smh#im guessing his clothes are gonna be in a worse state#and more bloody i dont think the legion is gonna care about cleanliness#this is more like under lanius#yes i am an evil person#arcade with graying hair save me#my art#slave arcade is such a tragic fucking thing#trust one person and get sold out#probably not the first one judging by him sayng lovers make poor confadants#no one is more damaged by reality
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I feel so vindicated knowing that we all read those many microexpressions correctly. Laura was really playing an anxious queer woman in love with her best friend so accurately that we couldn't help but pick up on all the little nuances.
#critical role#critical role spoilers#cr spoilers#cr lb#laudna#imogen temult#imodna#laura bailey#its just nice to know we werent reading into it too much#and that what we all saw was real#maybe some of it wasnt intentional but so much was#laura has been acting her heart out and i love her for it#now i just wanna know when imogen realized she was in love with laudna#personally i think it was when laudna almost went down the first time with fhe shade mother#i think she realized then that laudna could die#she definitely knew by the time they left for the heartmoore bc you cant convince me she wasnt pining when she was holding laudnas hand#she had it inna death grip and wanted laudna to go into her dreams#thats so gay shit right there#anyway
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the more photos of Sophie T I see the more I understand why she’s so beloved in the fandom. she’s just a whole fucking mood. like
first one she’s completely dead pan doing a perfect thumbs up
second one she’s doing an exaggerated stereotypical Italian hand gesture
and in the third one she’s just fully stanced up with her fucking coffee. what an icon.
#anyway i’m just starting to understand the hype around her sorry i’m late to the party#I DO LOVE Natalie Scatorccio#i just saw these photos and was suddenly like. yeah. I get it.#I know they’re not technically in character for all of these but also they definitely are#Yellowjackets#Yellowjackets cast#Sophie Thatcher#Natalie Scatorccio#(also bc JackieShauna brainrot and I know these are loosely in character but the fact that Jackie/Ella and Shauna/Sophie N)#(are next to each other in each of these and esp the way Jackie/Ella is looking at Shauna in that first one)#(adorable)#(I know people have different takes on who would have figured out their feelings first Jackie or Shauna)#(but I firmly believe that Shauna is oblivious through sheer force of will. like ‘of course I love her so much that I hate her.’)#(‘that is normal and acceptable.’)#(meanwhile Jackie like. knows how she feels about Shauna she just hasn’t really put together what it means.)#(like ‘yeah she’s the most important person in my life and I love her infinitely more than my long term boyfriend’)#(‘and prefer being held and touched by her and yes i’d let anyone die to save her and i cannot imagine a future without her in it’)#(‘and that i couldn’t imagine us losing our virginities separately. that’s not like. gay or anything.’#(last point a paraphrase of something Ella actually said about Jackie)#anyway this turned into a JackieShauna ramble whoops
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Sometimes it's okay to beat things up *grabs baseball bat* PENNYWISE GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE
#just thinking about all the times richie visited eddies grave- OH WAIT HE COULDNT#because eddie didnt fucking get buried and his body is stuck in the sewers and richie tried HE TRIED to get eddie out#but the other stopped him so the sewers wouldnt crumble on him and kill him too#so he had to leave the person he grew up loving and was tormented for by bullies and a clown#so not only did he get picked on for being gay but he also had his best friend and first lover probably only lover die in his arms#eds richie would whisper when they would sleep over as kids#eds richie whispers now in hopes that eddies ghost can hear him and feel his loneliness as he stays awake for days thinking about eddie#and the face he made when he died and richie will sob in the dead of night just begging for eddie to come back#all because i liked a boy#he thought because he thinks pennywise did all this because he's gay and queer and gross and a freak and he deserves this#so he feels like pennywise did him right and eddies death was his fault#fuck pennywise#reddie#welcome to my ted talk#richie tozier#eddie kaspbrak#richie x eddie#eddie x richie#it 2017#it 2019#it book#it movie#pennywise#pennywise the dancing clown#pennywise the clown#homophobia
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Doing a bit of a Santa Clarita Diet rewatch, and while I don't know intentional any of Abby's queer-coding was (and how much was just Hewson's vibes), her relationship with Eric has such teenage comphet energy. Like whenever Abby's like "I really care about you, more than anyone, but it's hard for me to pretend I'm into the physical; this has maybe a 2% chance of working out," my lesbian ass is just nodding so hard. Like, yeah! Exactly! You don't know you're gay yet, or you sense it in yourself and try to veer away, so what's the easiest option? You find the soft nerd boy, your best friend in the world, someone you absolutely trust to have your back no matter what, and go, "Yeah, uh huh, sure. I'll try that one." You absolutely look for the most non-threatening dude in the vicinity. And then it's improved by Eric's whole thing being like "yeah, this is absolutely someone I am down bad for, but if she doesn't wind up digging me that way, she's still my best friend." It reads so true. No idea if they were ever going to actually walk down that road, but in my heart of hearts? Here for it.
#santa clarita diet#i do not have a meta tag for this show and...i do not think i need one#but i get this a little more every time i revisit the show#some of it is almost definitely hewson's powerful queer energy but like. looking at the awkwardness of the sven thing lends to it too#you're trying really hard not to see yourself as a lesbian so what's the OTHER natural option to cling to?#the popular pretty boy#and it's just so awkward and uncomfortable#and then you get the winter friendship where there's so much chemistry and that just dumbass teen recklessness#that is innate to abby as a character but also SO present in first relationships for queer kids who are just incredibly excited to be In It#and then all the lil rainbows and shit in the costuming#yeah i'll die on this hill. lesbian vibes all the way for abby hammond i love this character so much#fun fact: my soft easy-cling friend of choice also happened to be gay#and while we literally never talked about it until we were adults i know we both clocked each other in like middle school#so shoutout to my buddy alex for being a safe 'yeah sure that can be a crush i never have to do anything about' person#a true legend of a man
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literally begging people to take 5 minutes to learn about the american military industrial complex, the poor/poverty to military pipeline, and how the american military treats its soldiers before condemning every single veteran because you think "muhmuh all soldiers evil!!1!!!1!1!11".
#directed at the person who said “glad the faggot died” in reference to the first openly gay soldier#leonard matlovich was a hero in the queer community and you can condemn the military without being awful to the people forced into#matlovich was a vietnam vet which means he was likely drafted#and back then your options were serve; face jail time; or die. they werent and still arent kind to deserters#if you hate all veterans and soldiers you're doing exactly what the military & government wants you to do#they want you to hate the individuals who were exploited and traumatized instead of the military itself#so you'll blame the individuals and not the system#so many people are trapped in service and dont want to do this anymore but have to#We all saw Aaron Bushnell self immolate; it was because legally he could not refuse orders#when you join the military you become legally government property and you have no say in what you do anymore#anyways i will always be pro-veteran & anti-military#do some fucking research before being awful thanks#the bad people you hate in the military are not foot soldiers are not airmen are not naval guards are not marines#theyre the generals and commanders and the people in charge#not the majoritoraly poor & poc people who were exploited with promises of wealth and safety#and b4 anyone takes this the wrong way i am pro-palestine & dont support the american military being used to assist a genocide
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Davos 1917 (2023)
#davos 1917#perioddramaedit#mine*#gifs*#i am making this my entire personality this christmas#the trailer quality is. not good.#also giffing trailers generally isn't fun#what do you mean this shot is only 30 frames..........#so i made this entirely for the last gif. look at them. gay.#even if they attempt to push the mother-daughter angle in press...i have eyes. lesbian behaviour all through those first two eps.#that said kann die ard bitte auch einen trailer machen der länger ist als 40 sekunden. danke.
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My 3 little cousins were baptized today. "Triggered" is kind of a strong word but being in a catholic church again... I'm a little fragile rn ngl.
#butch speaks#it was hard not to shake as i held J over the basin to have the water poured on his head#when he was cleansed of sin. as if a little kid could ever knowly or intentionally offend a so-called loving god#the words came naturally to me#but they meant nothing#i remember when they used to mean something. when i begged gods forgiveness for my sin (being a lesbian) and tried to pray the gay away#i remember how much i wanted to die bc i could never truly embrace the sacred#i STILL deal with the complex of catholic guilt. its a very real thing. its hard to shake#i cant help but wonder if the catholicism ingrained in my brain is why i have a hard time with casual dating n sex#fun fact: there was a point when i was a teen that i got REALLY catholic#i prayed everyday. i talked to my patrin saint (st agnes) every day. i wantsd to become a nun#the thought of marrying a man mad me more sad than feeling like an alien did. so id marry the church as a nun.#not the way to hide being a dyke when ur fam is catholic btw LMAO#the first priest i knew was father joe. i loved that guy. he was so kind. friendly. briming with love.#he was one of my biggest references for what a good person was like#he talked about gods love a lot. how its for everyone. no one is exluded. ever.#he used to look right at me when he said stuff like that. a few other kids too. all of whom grew up to be queer#then father joe passed away. our church merged with another church. father jeff was the priest there.#he was kind but not as kind. he talked about hell and sin more. he looked at the same kids father joe did.#but the kindness in his eyes wasnt there.#that wasnt for us.#my family wasnt even THAT catholic#i went to church every sunday i did vacation bible school and catechism classes and youth group#i was an altar servant and in the choir#i even used to speak/understand a little latin#imagine how much worse id have been if my mom could have afforded catholic school lmao#grateful to have grown up poor in that regard#hm. actually... reading my own tags. mayne we were pretty catholic actually.#fucking hell.#i need to have lesbian sex in a church before god and everyone. mayeb that would fix me.
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actually every time thorsten was a bit of a bitch to nika in the next ten years was just revenge for this
#nika i miss you every day.#thorsten in the first half of hart an der grenze is really like. hello. i'm gay i'm carless and i'm new in town.#i am not going to volunteer Any of my personal information to my new coworkers. outside work hours i will stand here silently until i die#tatort stuttgart
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just reread the mortal instruments for the first time in like seven (?) years and like it's fine and all but the concept would've been so much more interesting in the hands of a queer author
#expand tags to read more lmao#the mortal instruments#anti cassandra clare#my take with any body of work tbh#alec is my favourite but also very much gives Tortured Gay Written By Straight#clary should've ended up with simon (à la peeta mellark effect)#i love jace but he loses all personality as the love interest#also i will live breathe and die on the jalec hill they should've got the storyline that emma and julian did#the fact that the forbidden parabatai love story was given to a STRAIGHT couple is absolutely ridiculous#also i fucking hate malec it seemed so romantic when i was like 15 but now i cannot read it without thinking of my first relationship#ie. young and inexperienced me VS. what may not legally be grooming but technically is#à la rhys and feyre i HATE this immortal falling in love with a teenage mortal bs#red flag#magnus is also a gay character written for straight people#like he's fine but he's not giving yknow#i just relate a lot to alec and hate how him and magnus are so romanticised#IT SHOULD'VE BEEN JACE#imagine how good a jace and alec slowburn would've been in the last three books#talking of gay shit get izzy a girlfriend (and have it be me)#i jest but not - all of the lightwood siblings are gay wbk#clary is their token straight#all this to say give this idea to ME not to the ex ron x ginny author#anyway rant over#some teenage books live up to the hype (hunger games) and some don't (these)
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literally just found out Foucalt died in 1984 and not like 1701. They should have stopped letting people be philosophers. that shouldn't have been a career option at that point in history. wtf.
#reading something citing him and i was like oh he was gay? thinking it was like a speculative thing#no he literally was the first well known person in france to die of AIDS#god. humbled#post.me
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i love that the TLK movie kinda implies that england becomes the christian majority country it will be in small (but significant) part because aethelstan — considered by modern historians as its first king — was a gay man who believed that his piousness would absolve him of his sin. even believing in the movie that spreading christianity would balance out his sin of sodomy... inspired by a pagan man (masquerading as a christian — as a holy man at that—) he was so besotted with he was willing to choose said man over his country. the concept of it all... incredible creative vision.
apart from the tragedy both political and personal in the actual movie, there is something so strikingly meta-tragic about the story's implication of generations upon generations of future queer suffering happening because a powerful gay man believed he was powerless under the chrisitian god. obviously i don't know if this was intentional because the movie ends after uhtred pledges northumbria to the king so we don't know for sure what TLK aethelstan would have done afterwards. but the historical and fictional implications are still there and boy are they juicy
#like the more i think of it the more i truly am like. damn i'm so glad he was a self-hating gay man in the movie#because as fun as it would be to have him gay but not agonized over it#that wouldn't have been as interesting personally. maybe in a different‚ more modern story but not here#like i get that TLK aethelstan had more of a chance to not be high-stakes gayngsting due to having uhtred#but bringing in the aspect that he was known for being pious and a promoter of christianity in history#was a better addition vs. not acknowledging that facet#like showing him as a girlbossing (gaybossing?) king whose sexuality didn't define him and his story#(had the writers chosen to still write him as gay) would have made a much weaker character to me personally#if ever anybody in fiction had the rights to a gayngst story it's the first king of england#because of again. the implications!!#man it's so fun to write about TV shows again#ku blarghs#the last kingdom: seven kings must die#sorry for tagging if this isn't welcome
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a quiz team consisting of a trans couple, and their friend known only as "Dennis", brought to tears because they got through to the semi-finals of the BBCs quiz show Only Connect.
Queers keep winning <3
#i know no one on this app gives a shit about only connect but it's important to me#crustaceans I love you. I'd die for you#(+ poly. maybe bisexual? trans couple)#i made a post when they first appeared about how it's so cool to me personally seeing people like this#on random quiz shows with an older. more conservative (?) audience#i am not checking twitter because i dread to think#but over on tumblr it's just me here to talk about them#only connect#sorry this makes no sense.#I'm so sleepy i love being gay and i love seeing gay people gn#woes of emily
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i literally likw felt sick hust now bc i thought abt gay people and ive just realized as i was about to hit post that this sounds homophobic. it was pure envy unfortunately
#i need to have a gay moment or im going to die in real life. guys its so hard#mfw i never leave the house and im extremely closed off and distant from people and i never talk to anybody and im a shutin: When will i#meet my love.#ITS NOT GONNA HAPPENNN MY LOVE WILL NOT MATERIALIZE INSIDE MY STUPID GARAGE. PUNCHES THE WALL#also you may think connor youre not closed off you literally yap constantly about every single thought in your head. Yes. but thats to you#guys as a whole so it doesnt count#one on one conversations im so scared im like acat hiding under a bed. genuinely shaking crying#BUT I DONT NOT LIKE ONE ON ONE CONVERSATIONS I MISS THEM BADLY. i used to talk to online friends Everyday. and ugh. obvioisly.#i just like. idk. i wanna make friends but i feel like im so bad at being a person that its wah too much work to befriend me#i dont mean that selfdeprecatingly i mean like. i need the other person to make the first moves always which sucks bc thats a bad thing to#expect of someone but if i ever made the first moves i. well i just couldnt my brain would shut down its a whole thing. connor doesnt speak#unless spoken to etc. and again ik i yap on here#but thats bc this is like my diary. dms or discord or whatever Is a conversation.......sigh#but ya. and with time i think id warm up and be able to initiate congersation and reciprocate properly but thats a long time to make someone#wait. bc i also when ppl do reach out i like. im like . like w my old coworkers we were i think friends but i was like Im the only one who#thinks that they dont actually like Me so whenever they talked id be like Theyre just doing tjis to be nice or out of pity#which is a rude thought to have abt someone inknow but its like. idk .. im nonsensical#but it takes me a while to like. actually understand somebody is trying to be friends bc im obtuse as fuck#and im like Well theyre saying hello to me and amiling whenever rhey see me just to be nice or possibly bc they hate me <- stupid guy on 🌎
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sorry. wait. sorry. do you guys experience memories where you're sort of picturing it actually from your point of view? is it like you're actually imagining/remembering the frame-by-frame progress of events?? or am i just overthinking.
basically, do most other people just sort of remember things as like, word thoughts of "this happened and then this happened" with occasionally a still image or two and/or a scent? or do some people just have like freakishly good memories
#memory#sorry im being weird#but ive had a shit memory for forever#and just saw somebody mention SDAM#and it's absolutely gobsmacked me#like what do you mean people can vividly experience memories from first person POV?#the only time that's happened to me was my repeated nightmares about the time an ex friend told me gay people should die and go to hell#and in hindsight. that was middle school. middle school was when my memory was getting bad. and my vivid remembering of that is nightmares#hold on a moment maybe there's a new question i'm having here.#what makes an event a traumatic event
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