additional fuck marry kill: rita, cage, blue alpha mimic. i trust you have Thoughts on this one already. personally i would kill cage bc he’s into that kind of thing
You’ve got me in a devilish trap. If I kill the alpha and get its blood on me, which lets be real im not skilled enough to avoid that, I end up in the worst situation anyone can imagine—becoming the third person ever to experience the loop. Which means I would inevitably end up in a billrita poly situationship. Shudders
On the other hand billrita survival is important to me…yes cage is into dying but only in a controlled environment where he knows it won’t be the end. Outside of that his interest in death looks less fun and more like a death wish. My answer I guess would be highly specific. If Cage currently had alpha or omega blood, I’d kill him, knowing he’d probably be fine. And I’d make it really sexy it would be great. Marry rita, fuck the alpha really quickly before it managed to kill me. If that wasn’t an option, I’d probably bite the bullet, sacrifice myself to a near-eternity of resets & end up becoming a miserable member of the Worst People Ever gang but hey at least i’d get to supervise the babygirlification of bill Cage (fuck) with my emotionally constipated guywife rita vrataski (marry)
7 notes
·
View notes
not even JRR Tolkien, who famously developed the concept of the Secondary World and firmly believed that no trace of the Real World should be evoked in the fictional world, was able to remove potatoes from his literature. this is a man who developed whole languages and mythologies for his literary world, who justified its existence in English as a translation* simply because he was so miffed he couldn't get away with making the story fully alien to the real world. and not even he, in extremis, was so cruel as to deny his characters the heavenly potato. could not even conceive a universe devoid of the potato. such is its impact. everyone please take a moment to say thank you to South Americans for developing and cultivating one of earth's finest vegetables. the potato IS all that. literally world-changing food. bless.
69K notes
·
View notes
could you imagine trying to navigate this bar drunk, this is the 9th circle of hell
67K notes
·
View notes
Since you guys liked Marcille as Kermit that much, it seems fitting to thank you for my 12k milestone with MORE Kercille.
And this time, Miss Falin is also here.
Thank you so much again everybody! MWAH 💗
69K notes
·
View notes
The way most autism literature describes "literal interpretation" is often not at all similar to how I experience it. Teenage me even thought I couldn't be autistic because I've always been able to learn metaphors easily.
In fact, I love wordplay of all kinds. Teenage me was fascinated to learn all the types of figurative language there are in poetry and literature.
But paperwork and questionnaires are hard, because there's so much they don't state clearly. Or they don't leave room for enough nuance.
"List all the jobs you've had, with start and end dates." What if I don't remember the exact day or month? Is the year enough?
"Have you been suffering from blurred vision?" Well, if I take off my glasses the whole world is blurred, but I'm fairly sure that's not what the intake form at the optometrist is asking.
Or the infamous (and infuriatingly stereotypical) "Would you rather go to a library or a party?" What sort of party? Where? Who's there? I work at a library. Am I currently at the library for work or pleasure? Does it have a good collection?
It's not common figures of speech that confound me. It's ambiguity, in situations that aren't supposed to be ambiguous.
64K notes
·
View notes
"I would kill for you. I would die for you" would you take a break for me? Would you sit down and rest? For a day, a week, a year? Would you let others take care of your needs for me? Would you let yourself be held for me? By me?
192K notes
·
View notes
Guy just walked in with a shirt that said “I don’t question my wife’s choices because I’m one of them” and frankly I’m obsessed
79K notes
·
View notes
stuck between "psychological horror statement" and "objectively the funniest thing you could say to your real flesh and blood dad" in the father's day card aisle
64K notes
·
View notes