for not-stranger-things stuff; he/him, 21; minors DNI
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he's just a silly goofy little guy. how could anyone NOT love this face??
@spec-squared took out a double slot of my timed commission for this cutie!
If you need some last minute holiday gifts I have timed slots open! $20 for 20 minutes, shoot me a DM if you're interested!
#mom is gonna love it. of this i am sure.#pepper the pupper#also he's lucky he's so cute because he's a literal ankle-biter#he's a foot freak. he likes licking toes. i have to wear socks around the house lest i fall victim to his nasty little tongue.
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we all got really lucky that alexander fleming wasn’t allergic to penicillin huh
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the curse is lifted! you are no a beast no more! congratulations! but you'll never forget the way they looked at you, will you.
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so my brother is visiting for the holidays and he keeps doing this shit
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special defense
does this count as anything ???is this art
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when i went to alaska last summer, at all the parks and nature reserves and stuff there they of course had safety warnings about the wildlife.
for bears, the safety warnings were like, make noise, wave your arms, talk in a normal speaking voice, stay calm, don’t run, wait for the bear to move on which it will do 99% of the time, and you will be ok! 👍
for moose, the safety warnings were like. RUN.
#and now matter how big you THINK moose are. they are always Much Much Bigger.#also you tend to smell em before you can see em#they fuckin STANK
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where the FUCK did all the froyo places go...
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I’m visiting my friend right now in her 18th century home she’s restoring where the lights don’t work in one part of the house, creeping to the bathroom like some sort of haunt, feeling for the walls with rising dread, utterly lost in the perfect darkness, like Jonathan Harker in Dracula’s castle, if Jonathan Harker were the sort of person to trip and stand there cringing in the night as his can of trader joe’s sparkling rhubarb-strawberry juice bangs all the way down the oaken staircase, one step at a time, the cacophony of a freight train, and then proceed to practically crawl through the remaining dark to the bathroom for a washcloth, to wipe up the trader joe’s sparkling rhubarb-strawberry juice before it can soak into the wood floor, with the fevered terror of lady macbeth hallucinating blood on her hands
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Never trust an asexual who says “for fuck’s sake.” They do not hold stock in the sake of the fuck they are lying and manipulating you
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there's this annoying tweet going around on twitter dunking on "cringe Tumblr Prose" i.e. overly flowery or trying-too-hard-to-sound-literary posts and whatnot and god it's sparked such a miserable conversation because all im thinking while going through people pointing and laughing at all these posts and pieces of writing is. lord, yall dont know how to have fun or be genuine. i'd rather read a thousand cringe but earnest pieces of writing than read constantly irreverent uber-ironic pieces done out of fear of the social media panopticon of shame. like so what if it's goofy and pretentious-sounding at times. it's fun. do you guys remember when you did things for fun?
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I cant STAND a bitch that doesnt eat. What do u mean u only had an iced coffee. You know french dip exists right. Like there’s roasted brussel sprouts and burgers and tiramisu and taquitos and lox bagels and miso glazed salmon and beef vermicelli and apples with peanut butter and margs with tajin on the rim because we live on a newly discovered planet called EARTH. Idiot
#my coworker just told me she only eats one meal a day#and she's like “yeah I don't understand why I'm not losing weight. i only eat like 1200 calories a day :/”#like. GIRL.#YOUR BODY IS IN STARVATION MODE#YOUR POOR CELLS PROBABLY THINK YOU'RE GOING THROUGH A FUCKING FAMINE
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my cat Meatball’s hanukkah sweater started kinda coming off, so my girlfriend went to fix it, and as she did so she said to him, in her most tender and maternal voice, “aww, is your shirt coming off? whore”
#IT'S BACK#MY FAVORITE HANUKKAH POST#tumblr heritage post#my cat meatball's Hanukkah sweater#i love him
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