#Social connections and well-being

[artisticdivasworld]

The Science Behind Mental Health and Mental Health Treatments

Mental health is a complex subject that involves our emotions, behaviors, and thought processes. Scientists have made great progress in understanding how the brain works and develops insights into mental health issues and treatments. Here is an overview of some of the key scientific findings: The Brain’s Role The brain is the control center for our thoughts, emotions and behaviors. Mental…

[yardsards]

i needed to express a sentiment in the creative stylings of @dunmeshiminimumwage

[positivelyadhd]

i know the mortifying ordeal of being known ect ect but what about how much of a gift that can truly be?

people are reminded of you when they see something you love the same way you are reminded of them, the baristas at the coffee place remembering your order, getting to be the kind stranger that made someone feel a little better on a bad day.

each time you go out, whatever you touch, whatever you do, can have an impact on someone. while that can sometimes feel like the scariest thing in the world it's a huge part of the gift of being alive

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

Standing in the town square ringing my bell and yelling like Harry is the special one!!! Draco is the one who is just some guy!!!! Harry literally saved the world twice and had a prophecy made about him!!!! Draco is simply mean, blond, and rich!!!! Harry is the bold, adventurous, and self directed one!!! Draco is the one who does exactly what is expected of him!!!! Draco is a bad person, but he is not a bad boy his behavior sucks but it’s not subversive in the context of their culture!!! Harry literally overthrew the government!!! He robbed a bank and stole a dragon!!!! Hello?? Hello???

[weather-phenomenon]

anyone know if we have isolate harder tomorrow

[enbysiriusblack]

thinking about sirius being the one who hangs out with evan as a kid (their parents being friends and forcing them to have playdates) but sirius and evan don't get along and their playdates consist of them arguing and chucking toys at each other

[icewindandboringhorror]

sometimes looking at like Self Help Strategies lists for the symptoms I'm having is always just like:

thing that I already do

thing I have tried 10 times

thing I already do

thing that I don't have the money to do

thing I already do

thing I've been doing since I was 10yrs old to no avail

thing that is impossible given my situation

thing that doesn't apply to me

thing that I already do

thing I have already tried

hrmm, oh wait, maybe finally- OH, yeah.. okay. thing that I already do but it was just phrased slightly differently

thing I have already done

[creatingnikki]

notes to self: existing delulu land edition

knowing yourself and your needs and accepting then instead of ignoring them or forcing yourself to change is the first step towards most of what you want. once you understand that, you can work around it, you can work with it.

your need is connections. human connections that are authentic and warm and present. you don't like people who are absent and those that are inconsistent in their communication. it makes you anxious and triggers your overthinking qualities. you want to feel secure in the connection you share with the person and presence, consistent communication, and actions aligning with words are the basics of that.

so you don't force yourself to not want connections. you just make sure your life is full of wholesome, fulfilling, beautiful ones. you pick the good ones and you say bye to the bad ones before they develop into sources of unnecessary agony and hurt. you realize how to limit the impact of a connection with someone and how to deal with disappointment.

feeling good about yourself and being at peace with yourself, at least a little bit, is what will help you have clarity about what you want in a relationship and in your life. because then you won't be using people and situations as maladpative coping mechanisms or a way to soothe your insecurities or fill holes instead of fix them.

what do you not feel good about right now? the lack of stability across most aspects of your life? you're working on it, I know. and it's hard, I know. but you have to continue. for yourself. and to also form the kind of connections that you seek the most with others in life.

you have to lower the volume of social media and all these cross connections. meme culture and reels and echo chambers that make you feel like being delulu is the only solulu and that everyone is depressed and everything is fucked and adulting is the worst. because the truth is that it may make you laugh and humour helps but subconsciously you start believing these narratives and then it becomes the normal. but when the fuck did it become okay to normalize feeling tired and sleepless all the time? girl dinner and sad boi hours? situationships and casual dating when such intimacy means something to you? if you were 19 maybe you could let all this be a part of your vocabulary and life. but at 26 when you're seeking a balanced, healthy, good life and future, you have to reduce your consumption of the internet content and really protect your brain.

[giantkillerjack]

Uh-oh! You are like, SOOO awkward!!

You're so awkward that it is occasionally mildly uncomfortable for people!

You're so awkward that sometimes people are confused by you and then there are awkward silences!

You're so awkward ...... that ultimately no one is harmed!!

Oh damn!!! What a vile crime you have committed! What an unforgivable thing it is to make a fellow human briefly confused!

Why, if *I* were ever briefly confused and kind of uncomfortable as a result, I'd be devastated.... by the absolute net zero change in my happiness and health! - From which I might never recover!! Yes indeed! No punishment can ever be enough for you!!

So you better absolutely hate yourself for it.

Better be SO MEAN to yourself about every single missed social cue so you don't forget your horrible crime! Meaner than you'd ever dream of being to someone else for the same thing! This is YOUR responsibility!

You need to show the world that you KNOW you are bad by punishing yourself constantly! After all, think of all the people who BENEFIT from you punishing yourself! - No, really! Think about it! Think about who benefits from your pain.

Think of alllllll the definitely-good people that your definitely-necessary self-torment definitely helps! I mean, you can't just cut off their definitely-life-sustaining supply of your suffering, right?? Sure, everyone else has a breaking point, but you're probably the only person in human history who doesn't, right? Best not to question it probably. Sure, it's a symptom that billions of people with trauma have had, but who knows? You could be a one-in-seven-billion exception. Anything's possible!

Instead, better just accept that idea that bullies carry like guns in holsters - the idea that people who have trouble with social cues deserve to suffer. Better carry on the burden they placed on you until you drop. Aid the cause of the callous by enforcing shame and suffering upon yourself extra hard; try your best to do their work for them. They're very busy.

Better not recognize that you need patience and kindness to heal from your trauma. Better not find out that it was trauma rather than personal weakness filling your head with self-hating thoughts. Better not find out it wasn't your fault.

Better not find out that awkwardness is not inherently harmful or unkind, and, in fact, the people who act like it is *are the ones enacting harm and being cruel.*

Better not get righteously angry when you realize just how much unnecessary damage this has done to you. After all, if you get mad, you might realize you deserve better. You might even feel brave enough to DEMAND better! You might build boundaries that keep you safe! You might make other people think they deserve to feel safe too! And we obviously can't be having that, so...

Better not show yourself even a little kindness a little bit at a time.

Better not make a habit out of it after all that practice.

Better not get confident.

Especially if you can't first wipe out every trace of awkward. (And you probably never will. Because people who experience absolute social certainty at all times tend to be insufferable assholes that enforce the status quo. And you just don't have the stock portfolio for that.)

Better not be confident and awkward because then you might confuse and delight people

- you might accidentally end up making other people feel less shame for their social difficulties

- you might make isolated, traumatized, and shy people feel like they deserve to be included in social situations

- you might even make them feel they can be themselves around you

- you might start loving the effect you have on a room

- you might enjoy conversations more

- you might forgive yourself and bounce back from shame more easily and frequently

- you might come to enjoy some of those moments of harmless confusion you cause because NOBODY expects the Confident Awkward, and that can genuinely be an advantage in social situations

- you might stop apologizing so much.

- you might find that socializing is like a video game: it requires practice but also a safe space for it to be fun and positive.

Or if you can't become assertive and confident, better not remain awkward and shy and quiet, and then love and forgive yourself anyway!

Why, it would be carnage!!

In either scenario, you run the risk of finding out that it's not your fault that safe spaces full of kind people can be really hard to find, create, and nurture. You could end up building a skillset that helps you do those things if you're not careful!

If you start giving yourself even the tiniest amount of grace at a time, you will find that you've accessed a gateway drug with extreme long-term side effects:

- You might realize that it was never your fault that it took so long to like yourself.

- You might realize that you were always worth talking to, even when you didn't like yourself and communication felt impossibly difficult.

- You might realize that you'll still be worth talking to even if communication becomes harder as you age and/or experience disability.

- You might come to know that you deserve to be heard even on bad days when words come slow and blurry.

You might discover that you were always deserving of kindness, first and foremost from yourself.

So. As you can see, it's FAR too much of a risk to start granting your awkward self free pardons for your many heinous and harmless crimes. Better to just leave it there.

[manasurge]

I’m so sad I can’t partake in art fight stuff due to the really bad timing on my end bc it’s the busiest season at work, as well as I haven’t been able to finish any art for myself for ages now and I’m trying to catch up on it bc it keeps getting pushed back (basically I wish I had more time to draw 😔 I’m also slow af so I’m triple cursed, ugh)

(Granted I’ve never done any kind of art fight before, but even then… maybe next year…? Lol. Tho I so wish it wasn’t in July bc it’s such a cursed time for me /sobs. I’ve always watched it happen as a spectator but I’ve only ever been a lurker).

[jamethinks]

Twilight getting caught up in the illusion of having a family and then feeling bad for Nightfall since she's so lonely and has no one and no one likes her at all (like Handler can't even get to assign her with any other agents cause they all hate her) so he tries to get her to socialize with the other ladies at her job and tries to get her friends but she's so disinterested and doesn't even try

[chryblossomjjk]

...

[bottombaron]

whenever i think abt writing Nandor and i get going thru a series of sequences of him behaving like a well-adjusted, caring, adult i have to stop myself, backspace several mental paragraphs and remember that he's basically a semi-captive lion being observed in a nature documentary and he functions on 92% Id

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

love the idea of transhet laios

[herrmit]

not to start shit but. tell me you didn't understand princess jellyfish without telling me you didn't understand princess jellyfish

[wisterianwoman]

How to Regulate Your Nervous System for a Balanced Life