#but that doesnt mean they dont care and love and have social behaviors of their own that shouldnt be judged less than
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whenever i think abt writing Nandor and i get going thru a series of sequences of him behaving like a well-adjusted, caring, adult i have to stop myself, backspace several mental paragraphs and remember that he's basically a semi-captive lion being observed in a nature documentary and he functions on 92% Id
#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#nandor#nandor the relentless#neat fanfic trick: if you're nandor is behaving ooc like a normal well adjusted empathetic human being just ask yourself#āwhat would a lion do in this exact scenario?ā#and whatever the absurdity it's probably closer to the truth than not#anyways i have a lot to say abt the amorality of the vampires and how they simply don't function with the same human ethical thought#but that doesnt mean they dont care and love and have social behaviors of their own that shouldnt be judged less than#and will express those emotions in ways that might feel foreign to most humans#...is what i say to myself to keep from crying as i delete 3 pages of nandor talking out his feelings ššš#(also brief note: when i say he functions on Id its not that he lacks intelligence or the capacity to use it along with his ego/super ego)#(as seen in the s5 finale)#(but rather he's an apex predator so his whole being is funneled into traits for hunting. not other things we think show intelligence)#(in the mordern non hunting/gathering world)#(which is partially why he's so disconnected from the world and struggles to find purpose in an environment that no longer values him)#(truthfully nandor is human but simply the definition of humanity has changed rapidly from what it valued centuries before)#(and leaves nandor lost)#(except for guillermo. his one connection to humanity and what anchors him to the modern world š„²)#(...looks like i got lost in the tags again...)
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you were not mine to save -> to be loved is to be changed
i keep thinking about how
if you boil down alhaitham & kaveh's akademiya-era fallout fight, it was that alhaitham wanted to change kaveh & kaveh could never agree with his proposed course of action
but now, as full grown adults, alhaitham isnt trying to change kaveh anymore
that core conflict does reoccur, as it did during Parade of Providence when alhaitham lectured kaveh after Act II & kaveh got annoyed
(even though Alhaitham was obviously just worried about kaveh's health/wellbeing...)
this is a common pattern of behavior for them: alhaitham is worried about kaveh & kaveh reacts defensively to it
which speaks to how stubborn & hyper-independent kaveh is
despite being someone who's dedicated to giving back to the community and contributing towards the larger social good, he's quite determined on his own path in life
he'll bear the consequences (ie bankruptcy) all by himself if necessary...! and he's much too stubborn to be talked out of his own decisions
i dont think there was any possible way kaveh could have walked away from the wrecks of the first build of alcazarzaray and still be at peace with himself
and kaveh even admits he was naive (in his teapot dialogue), but he doesnt regret it still even now
so i think its cool alhaitham realised that there's no point in trying to convince kaveh to change who he is
such is kaveh. kaveh will not be someone different, not even for alhaitham. his work & altruism are parts of his core identity
why fight a mountain who will not be moved?
instead, alhaitham goes for more "harm reduction" strategies:
help cover kaveh's bar tabs, which means he's also the one lambad calls to pick up kaveh & see kaveh home safely
snark at kaveh when he's ranting about clients to keep him in a righteous mood instead of getting depressed
there's a quote about how to be loved is to be changed....
and alhaitham certainly has changed so much from that smart-mouthed student who had pinpointed what he thought was the root of kaveh's overbearing altruism and figured he could fix kaveh's problems with that knowledge!
to now as an adult with a lot more life experience: alhaitham knows that kaveh isn't his to save
and the more he tries to force kaveh to changing, the more likely kaveh is to dig his heels in
alhaitham doesnt need to be kaveh's minder or overbearing best friend--
he wants to be kaveh's partner, his equal, which means respecting kaveh's choices for what they are
anyways kaveh's drowner analogy works rly nicely for this core conflict between them (changing people vs supporting them and protecting them from harm)
& i cant believe its canon
i really appreciate this aspect of their relationship too-- it feels very mature & realistic...
how easy it would be if you could just TELL someone how to fix their problems!
its very frustrating to see someone you care about run straight towards problems again & again...
but you can't change someone's mind bc you want it to be that way. they have to decide on their own, on their own volition, and to truly believe in their decision, for the changes to really stick
as much as it sucks that you can't just solve people's problems for them
the human experience is so much richer for all of our different perspectives and ideas and principles that will not be compromised bc someone else wanted it to be
you can't control people's thoughts & that's for the best (also alhaitham's SQ is literally about this lmao)
#genshin impact#kaveh#alhaitham#hkvh#dev thoughts#meta#twt crosspost#haikavetham#kavetham#haikaveh#obsessed with how their story ultimately boils down to#you can't force someone to change no matter how much you love them#you can only decide for yourself if you're willing to support them through life's struggles#they may change as we all do when growing older#but you can't expect that of them
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ASTRO NOTES - 1
These are notes not observations because yes these are factz onlii šæ Take it with a pinch of salt
ā ļøTW- sensitive, my cry soft babies š„ŗ this is not for u honey just take my virtual hug š« and take care of urself š
Capricorn moons are a disgrace to Capricorn community it is because of them the "capricorn sun" is stereotyped as judgemental and close minded for being so rigid when in reality it is true for moons onli the cap suns are the sweetest and most open minded people ever infact they are observational and not judgemental which indicates a higher level of intelligence unlike the cap moons (we get it its in detriment and you got a ton loads of mommy issue but baby whos gonna heal them? š¤”forget being the joker now, past is over)
Same way libra suns are petty and pathetic esp with their manipulative as well as people pleasing behaviors they are disgrace to libra community its other libra placements that represents true beauty and not shallowness or over rationalisation
I have to break it up to you but aquarius venus does not move on that easily infact many times it fails to move on they are just good at hiding it wanna know why? Because it is ruled by saturn daddy that means it is disciplined, determined and focused AND NO THEY ARE NOT CHEATERSSSS!!! Also being ruled by uranus means they will keep on bringing new changes (cant say for good or bad whoops!! ) in the relationship because it is a visionary sign they are probably daydreaming about marriage š„ŗš„ŗ and yall are here throwin misiformationšš PLUS ITSSS A FIXED SIGN WHAT YOU EXPECT FROM A FIXED SIGN SOCIETY?? TO MOVE ON IN THE SNAP OF A FINGER LIKE THANOSSSS BRO??
Now speaking of fixed venuses (aquarius, taurus, scorpio and leo) all of these fixed venus people at least have one lover they can never move on from they might feel they have moved on then suddenly the memories resurface šš»āāļøšš»āāļø you thought it was over huh?š¤ŗš¤ŗ
Whats up with SCORPIO placements having a love for dogs and having a dog pet at least once in their life (esp moon) and then scorpio suns usually hating cats? šæ is it because they are willful and wont be manipulated by u? I suggest u seek some psychopath diagnosis this is some serious underdeveloped energy SIS/BRO IT IS UNHEALTHY
Aries and Scorpio mars would love the idea of tearing your clothes while making out or making love ššš„µ
Libra moons with air rising should actually consider polyamory
All libra moons are true romantics or should i say hopeless romantics
Cancer suns are pathological liars Its not Gemini yall need to stop giving them fake rep of lying
Leos suns talk a lot and they do not mix well with earth suns even if they try to earth sun will eventually find themselves pissed and drained bcuz of how much they speak and boast they are constantly speaking š (gives headaches in worst case scenario)
Virgo sun and risings really do a lot of stuff and chores despite having phone addiction and even if they are not good in academic or dislike what they are studying they will still be seen suffering with books and notebooks
Venusians suns with leo moon are pretty miserable they are pessimistic and overthinkers it feels like they dont have touch with their emotions at all because they are constantly rationalising emotions to the point they are repulsive to deep feelers and feels almost inhumane š¬like you would not like forming deep connections with them because you will realise they lack emotional capabilities to connect with they sometimes can even make you loathe them or very annoyed its like you are dealing with someone who doesnt make sense at all as if their brain is underdeveloped or something you just dont wanna deal with them
Scorpio placements are not loyal
Sagittarius placements and doms laugh a lot š
All capricorn suns and virgo risings are skinny or petite
Aquarius suns do love posting on social media a lot and they do care about ur instagram š
Air venus can easily stay loyal with online relationships infact they are all loyal idk where the stereotypes are stemming from
#astronotes#astrology observations#astrologyobservations#astrology#capricornsun#libramoon#leosuns#leo#air venus
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Tell me about Rook if you don't mind
I honestly haven't paid much attention to anyone from pomefiore so I have a very basic idea on who Rook is and I would like to read someone's thoughts about him
HI HI THANK YOU I LOVE YOU /P
(also shout out to @natsukishinomiyaswife who asked me to talk about him in the comments of that post š)
OKAY SO. THE THING IS. it kinda annoys me when people are like "oh hes weird" "oh hes creepy" and i tend to get a bit defensive about it because YES!! YES HE IS!! AND THAT'S WHY I LIKE HIM!!
hes weird!!! hes weird and hes offputting!!! and he talks too much and hes overly theatrical with his emotions (while still hiding So much) and people think hes annoying!!!! and like- ME TOO!!!
i feel like i see myself a lot in him because im also too loud and too theatrical and too poetic in how i talk and dont always know how to interact with people in a "normal" way and people think im weird and annoying. except Rook is just so?? unashamed about it?? he just does what he wants and doesnt seem to care if people find him weird or creepy ā he clearly respects Vil so much and would do So much for him, yet when Vil tells him that he's being weird or annoying Rook just. carries out with his thing. and i kind of love that. its so so very sweet to see somebody who just fully accepts his weirdness and embraces it and doesnt let anybody bully him out of it
kind of on the same topic ā he always felt very obviously neurodivergent coded to me?? like he comes off as so obviously autistic that its basically canon to me. like, yes, hes often obvious to social cues but also. theres a moment in his Halloween vignette where he says that as a kid he didn't know how to express his emotions and he had learned it from watching theatre. or in one of his birthday vignettes when he says that once he focuses on something, it seems to consume him completely (not a direct quote but you get the idea shfjshf). and thats another thing that makes me like him more because ā again, relatable
and while i do thing that the in-universe explanation for a lot of his more creepy behavior is a mix of him being very passionate about his interest and being obvious to/ignoring social cues (NOT saying that being autistic makes you act like a creep or anything YOU GET WHAT I MEAN). HOWEVERā i dont like him despite his stalker tendencies, i like him BECAUSE of them.
okay. listen. would a lot of the things he does be suuuper creepy irl? yes, obviously. but theres a lot characters that i like even tho i would probably hate them irl (cough, Vil, cough, Riddle, cough). and i do have a thing for characters who tend to get obsessive over other people ā its good story potential!! its entertaining!!! i love watching him be a little weirdo and talk about hunting people its simply fun
AND THATS THE THING!! hes just entertaining!!! he has so many moments that are simply funny alright. i love when he's being dramatic when other characters are done with him when hes being so Out There. like,,, everything he did in book 6? peak comedy. that one vignette where he tells Malleus that he has hunted lizards but never caught a dragon? insane thing to do, so fucking funny. also him wanting to drink Vil's poison even tho there was No reason to do so whatsoever? unhinged. i love him so much
another thing (kinda related tho) is that while reducing him to his relationship with Vil would be doing him a HUGE disservice, it IS one of the things that drew me to him. it's just so interesting and tells a lot about who Rook is as a character and i feel like people missinterpret it a lot which is very sad. i love that Rook decided to change dorms simply so he can follow a guy around because he thinks said guy is pretty ā again, insane thing to do, so fucking entertaining. i love how he talks So much about Vil and his admiration for Vil. but hes not blind in his devotion!!! hes by Vil's side because he choose to be and he could as well walk away if he choose to, Vil doesn't hold him on a leash. he can be harsh on Vil, criticise him and its BECAUSE he cares so much for Vil. he wants Vil to become even more brilliant, after all!! and Vil knows that!!! Vil knows that Rook is by his side On Conditions, even if he's not always sure what those conditions may be and id say he likes that. i mean, come on that man loves a challenge. and that's what makes their relationship so compelling to me! Rook is not a guard dog, the two of them are equals, theres a back-and-forth between them and yet Rook is always there when Vil needs him. okay i may have gotten off track a bit but i have A Lot of feelings about their relationship and i needed to get it off my chest lmao
ANYWAYS! i love his obsession with beauty and specifically, i love how it manifests. hes not focused on the "conventional" meaning of beauty, but instead hes able to find it anywhere. again ā even if some of the things he fawns over others may find weird, it's actually so sweet that he's able to find beauty in things that other people may not even consider.
AND SPEAKING OF THAT ā HES ACTUALLY SO SWEET!! like yes alright he can often be too blunt and say things without considering how they may impact other people's feelings, but i dont think hes unkind. there's actually so many moments where he's being sweet. like,, (in the main story at least, cant remember anything about any of the events dhfjsjf) he was basically always nice to Yuu. one of my favorite Rook moments is when he's comforting Deuce in book 5 (comparing him to a chicken in an egg no less which like. amazing). or the way hes always so supportive of Epel? i LOVE the whole part of book 6 when Epel discovered his UM. Rook was so proud of him!! i love that scene where Rook helped Epel with using it, it was so sweet
a smaller thing but his interests are so dear to me. like, yes hes a hunter and an archer but he also likes history!! and historical fashion!! and classical music!! and poetry!! and theatre!! idk there's something very sweet to me here (especially that i do happen to share a lot of his interests shfjshf). ALSO THE FACT THAT HE'S INTERESTED IN ARCHEOLOGY THATS SO SPECIAL TO ME. tho i DO also love that hes an archer, im always weak to archer characters
also hes one of the most queercoded characters in the game imo and as a gay bitch i have to appreciate that
okay i think im done thank you so much for the question writing all that made me feel very normal and sane š«¶
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I've seen you pop up in the #sparkletag quite a bit recently, and as both a Patron and as a friend of Kneeby, I think I've had enough of your antics.
It's really depressing to see someone dedicate their entire online presence towards hating someone. It's extremely creepy and weird to obsess over every single thing kit does like this. I urge you to go find a better hobby, and I mean it. This kind of parasocial behavior is toxic and only serves to hurt everyone including yourself. Take a break from this and use that time to reflect on yourself and what you really want. Do you want to dedicate all of your time constantly rambling and raving about everything kit does online? Does that sound like a productive use of your time? I don't think it is.
all my posts boil down to "the pacing and prioritization of this comic could use a lot of improvement + i find it weird that the creator isnt raising awareness to a literal genocide going on rn" and you react by writing an angry essay. your ask seems to boil down to "you cant criticize my favorite comic because it might hurt the creators feelings" so im gonna respond with an angrier essay
there are good things about sparklecare, obviously. i resonate with it in some regards. but that doesnt mean its perfect, as nothing is. i dont even tag my shit under the main sparklecare tags (apart from the stuff about kneeby not raising awareness towards palestine) because i know people like you are gonna get upset if you see a conflicting opinion on your dash. the only tags i tend to use are #sparklecriticism and #sparklecare criticism, none of the main tags. block those tags if you dont wanna deal with me.
my criticism is valid (i think) since yeah. the comics writing has a huge problem when it comes to letting things happen naturally instead of rushing them, which results in kneeby having to explain things on the blog (which 99% of the time you have to scroll deep into since the main blog is constantly reblogging the cometcare one) rather than having the comic clarify it on its own. thats a genuine issue in storytelling so i feel like it should be addressed and worked on.
i have way more of a presence online than this blog, obviously. i just dont want this blog connected to my real identity for a wide variety of reasons (mainly not wanting to be harassed even further than i already am)
if youre a friend of kneeby then i think you should tell kit to actually DO SOMETHING to raise awareness to the genocide going on in palestine and other targets, PUBLICLY. not just an announcement in a private discord, a public statement, or AT LEAST reblog the fanart of uni waving the palestinian flag. all the social commentary ive seen (yes im still taking the social commentary into account since the comic was described as such until my blog popped up) has come across as performative to anyone besides the clowns themselves, id love to see kneeby talk about issues that dont just apply to kit.
i know damn well the sparklecare blog is kits biggest platform, kit should use it to raise awareness, i dont care if the topic makes kit sad, it makes me sad too, but i still retweet as much shit about it as possible whenever it crosses my mind because i actually care about issues that dont involve just me and i actually want to do something to change the world. im a teenager and i do more to raise awareness than a group of adults.
im just a kid with opinions
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is kip sabian a tumblr sexyman
//kinda heavily edited 7/28/23. im trying to be more neutral about this, still keeping this within just the on-screen character. added in a few more things that are on the list linked below, so the results have actually kinda drastically changed now these are still just my opinions and ofc this doesnt negate how hes really perceived, its just interesting to see this being called out so many times but when you put actual evidence on it, boy how the tables turn lmao
so we all have probably heard the question by now
seeingĀ this postĀ on my dash, i have foundĀ resourcesĀ now to see for myself, collect data and give you the actual result to this burning question
i got you tropes, my takes on them and whether they apply to him under the cut. things to note, this is my personal view tho im trying to keep it neutral, and im only tackling the on-screen character as its been portrayed on tv and some other special occasions when it has specifically shined through (take him invading ocs streams for example)
green is yes red is no yellow is maybe anything in italics are an edit from the original post
4th wall blurring - technically wrestling is already very blurred lines, but take the kip/oc feud for example and the lengths he took it to on social media, twitch etc. outside the ring
Androgynous - arguable, its the eyeliner for me bro. that and the way he carries himself. currently this also includes the hair/hair colors and the eye shadow. gender is a social construct
Animal theming
Angst - it depends how you view it. its not like full blown angst sadness, but it sure does exist, especially with how he talks about himself tbh
Bait - he just organically formed into this shape. i dont believe he specifically designed this style or characteristics to make himself be perceived as a tumblr sexyman
British
Burton
Capitalist
Chaoslord
Chronokinetic
Criminal
Cosmic
Clown
Controversial - i dont know why some of yall hate him so much but apparently people do so. whatever
Deadpan snarker - he can be, but not to a point of a defining character trait
Dealmaker
Detective
DILF - not yet
Distinctive voice - so the source list updated this to feature catchphrases and yes. "embrace the change", "time doesnt heal it changes you", "underrated and over it". you get the deal
Divorced
Dominating - there are cases. but mostly i think hes just a pathetic fool idk. but also this is a theming in wrestling in general so like. go figure
Duality - with and without the box, there is a difference
Egotistical
Eldritch - only in fanon i think ive seen this one. and partially personally applied this one lol (tho i mean idk if we get the box back in some form we might see more hints about this so it might turn into a maybe!!)
Eye imagery
Fanon splintering
Forest Dweller
Gay/LGBTQ+ coded
Girlboss
Glowing neon
Goo
Himbo - okay listen. as much as i would LOVE to mark this one as a solid yes, since we are strictly talking about boxman era and after on-screen kip, this doesnt stand, as he doesnt show himbo behavior on camera. im keeping it as a maybe tho, just for the sake of showing that im aware and i care <3
Hot-headed
Intelligence - also counts for the sub category smartdumb. an idiotic mastermind
Johnlocked - dont get me wrong, ive seen ships, but i dont think its ever been super extensive or overpowering. yall need to work harder lol. unfortunately despite my personal bias and seeing its growth in popularity, i still cannot mark this even as a maybe
Knifemurder
Mad scientist
Magnificent bastard - im just gonna copy the definition here. "As per TV Tropes, a Magnificent Bastard is a "villain (or morally gray character at best) portrayed as confident, charming schemers who thinks on their feet, outsmarts their competitors with style and grace, and remains graceful even in the event of defeat"."
Marked canon/fanon divergence
Monster features
Mysterious - boxhead in the crowd for months building intrigue + the unadvertised meet and greets at events. plus seemingly extensive lore we never get/got, unexplained box mysteries, etc.
Neurodivergent - i was thinking about excluding this, but he talks about his adhd so openly PLUS a big part of boxman came from the depression and anxiety of when he was on the shelf after surgery so. it counts for me
Nonhuman
Object head
Obscured face - technicality, but i count it as he wore the box for so fucking long. we didnt see his actual face for literally a year
Obsessive - HAVE YOU SEEN HOW OFTEN HE TWEETS AT OC i rest my case
Oncelerization
Pale twink - im making a personal decision to say no on this as none of the definitions really hit the mark like, at all. literally the only ones on the list are 'young' and 'dude' like. nope
Parental figure
Parental issues
Pathetic - A THOUSAND TIMES YES
Perpetual smiler - he gets the shit kicked out of him in the ring and still fucking laughs at it on the spot
Power
Power of love - yall have seen penelope, right?
Religious imagery - no, but marking sub category demonic as a maybe since connections to penelope
Retro - this is interesting, im putting it down as maybe since its not really showing but the current design choices with the grayscale gear makes me think about old timey stuff
Robot
Royalty
Scars
Secret agent
Short
Tall - im withdrawing this one, since the definition is "really/abnormally tall" and hes only 5'11 so. this was marked as a 'maybe' before
Teacher figure
Theme song
Thin - "characters that are fairly slim but dont fit under pale twink" i can accept this lol
Traitor/Twist villain
Twisted freaking cycle path
Unkempt
Upper class - i dont necessarily consider it but i guess. keeping this as a maybe since the suit aesthetic is very high class so
Urban legend aesthetics - CRYPTID RIGHTS FOR KIP
Villain/Morally gray/Refined villain/Technically antagonist
Well-dressed/Suitguy/Long coat - suit, pinstripes, long coat. i kind of want to also say the alt fashion counts here since he can be very emo but you know
White twink humanization - all im asking is that you dont humanize that box. please
White hair
29/75 40/75 6/75
final thoughts:
so i see where this thought comes from. he definitely hits like some of the biggest tropes (fancy british man with an object head, a stupidly catchy theme song and catchphrases, a hot wife and a plan to dominate orange cassidy the world), but we are also missing some obvious ones like him being just a stupid murder whore so like. go figure
this is a very subjective list im aware, there are a few things that could probably be seen differently but i, as a self proclaimed Expert And Conspiracy Theorist In The Kip Sabian Spaceā¢, will hold this belief system until someone tells me otherwise lmao
anyways this was just for fun dont take this as seriously as i did the first time around lol. enjoy, just dont argue with me. if you need any tropes need explaining, look at the link above and/or just ask and i'll let you know what i was thinking with marking them if there arent notes explaining or if they are confusing
ā
#this is still the single stupidest thing ive ever done but behold#i spent so much time on this originally and now going through it again wow#anyways. have fun im gonna have coffee oof#kip sabian#my beloved#kip in a box#i need to tag this now in case i need to find it again fuck me#wrestling musing
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why is that bad? he's been through so much. I can't see mike complaining, in fact I see mike insisting he do stuff because he likes to and it doesn't mean will doesn't show appreciation back.
and thank you for pointing out that in times he has pillow princess energy it doesn't mean he's inactive during sex, he loves sex too much to not be participating, he's just being treated well by his gentleman haha
WOW im also learning about myself during these discussions, because i think i subscribe to these ideals in my own life but am perhaps completely unself aware about what others would think of me?
likeā¦ something about the term pillow princess suggests a negative judgement - and in fact when its used in the context of straight women in bed especially, it IS used pejoratively. As in: shes lazy, she just lays back and relies on being hot and does no work. Its definitely something people use as a negative descriptor. Same for trophy wife. In general, thats not seen as an admirable thing to be by culture. so seeing people using that same pillow princess terminology in a positive light for will is what i couldnt get my head around i think even tho i agree with your reasons why he should be pampered. But i dont think what you described is pampering! I think its just being normal? Isnt it just will behaving in a way that he (and everyone!) deserves to some of the time: being doted upon and kicking back and letting someone else do the work! So i think i couldnt see how that was a specific thing that needed labelling, because its just a normal part of being human
or am i unknowingly revealing that some people would call me an accidental pillow princess lol? I dont see that as me getting special treatment though - literally who doesnt deserve to kick back and have people do things for them sometimes? Am i missing the point? I mean, as a woman maybe its different. I have known women who want a man just to do the man jobs around the house so they dont have to, whereas im the kind of person who would be embarrassed to not be able to do things for myself. Feels like feminism taking some steps back, you know. So i can do the stuff, but sometimes if others want to help or do it instead, i let them because thats the give and take of life haha!
Yeah I think there's different connotations and usages with different people. To be honest, I've really rarely heard it certain ways used outside of kind of deep online social media/fandom spaces. Like for me, even if maybe irl a certain dynamic is slipped into, it's not like the whole thing was given a definition or terminology. It just is what it is. And I'm super versed in the history, but my understanding was from an origin in bedroom dynamics of the lesbian community? But as many concepts, warped and turned into multiple uses through colloquialisms.
And I see what you mean, the pampering/doted upon situations just being a normal part of life. I think the difference is turning it into something a little extra? Intentional behavior, not just just the standard sweetness and taking care of each other that comes with a healthy, happy relationship. I think it just depends on how you personally view concepts.
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BPDtistic Diaries - 2 October 2023
finally here i am deciding to bite the proverbial bullet and follow my therapists advice and put my feelings out into the void.
what can i really say besides that i really hate existing. its difficult and messy and it sucks absolute bollocks. lately ive been feeling especially alone. usually i am comfortable in my aloneness so perhaps its more accurate to say that ive been incredibly lonely. trapped in my own head.
i know ive got some semblance of a support system but it never seems to be enough. nothing ever really seems to be enough. ive been leaning on my boyfriend a lot especially and i can see it taking a toll on him. and i want to give him a break but im totally incapable of taking normal distance and not just completely withdrawing and making everything worse.
it also just totally sucks to be so aware of my own selfishness and yet completely unable to control it. i cant help but chime in with my own perspective even when i try to listen. i know socially people dont see it that way but to me it seems like a pretty good way of connecting through mutual experience. i do desperately wish i was in fact not like this. but really what can i do at this point. it feels desperately hopeless.
and honestly my life currently doesnt seem to help. because what am i? a university dropout with no job who cant even take a fucking shower. my boyfriend keeps saying he loves me the way i am but i just cant believe it because i dont see much to love.
plus since last week i keep splitting on him all the time. i need his approval and reassurance and love. but the switch flips and i dont give a shit about him, i want to lash out and make him feel hurt like i do. i suddenly dont even care about him. seven months and i just keep ruining our relationship more and more. i mean splitting because he cant come to my cousins wedding because of exams? like what.
to be fair its like right at the end of his exams so really why cant he be bothered? ive only got the two cousins, i dont have the big family that he does with like 15+ cousins. so its a big deal to me and somehow despite my saying that he doesnt seem to get it. its a really big deal to me and i dont know if i can get past it with all the big feelings of rejection and abandonment its brought up for me.
i do so much for him and i sacrifice and i adjust my behavior for him. and i logically know hes good to me. hes a good man. but the emotions are overwhelming and i want to leave him. i wont do that, ill try to communicate instead. i really will. and ill try my hardest not to be super manipulative.
i work hard at that. i know i can be very subtly manipulative but im getting better. im doing all the DBT stuff and trying my best. im worried it wont be enough.
AnguishedAndAmiss
#AnguishedAndAmiss#actually bpd#bpd#bpd vent#bpd blog#actually autistic#autism#autistic adult#actually neurodivergent#actually mentally ill#actually cptsd#living with cptsd#actually audhd#actually borderline#actually cluster b#actually traumatized#personal#blog post#bpd thoughts#living with borderline#living with autism#tw depressing thoughts#depression
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alright ive mentioned these headcanons before but since it is currently autism acceptance month and this show is my special interest i wanna go more in depth on my autism headcanons for the gravity falls characters!!!
dipper: obviously his interest in the supernatural can be considered a special interest, and he also tends to be very organized and gets upset when things dont go how he planned (best example of this is in double dipper). he also has trouble a lot in social situations and a lot of his behavior is stimming (like chewing on/clicking pens, chewing on his shirt, pacing, etc). also gf is a cartoon so its not too weird that he wears the same outfit every day but i am choosing to believe its because thats his routine.
mabel: very creative and eccentric i love her. she also stims a lot and tends to miss social cues, but unlike dipper she doesnt get nervous, she just tends to be a bit sillier and more outgoing in situations where it may not be appropriate. shes also pretty high empathy; she cares a lot about people and objects and in the hand that rocks the mabel its shown she has a hard time saying no because she doesnt want other people to be upset. she also wears the same outfit everyday (not Exactly the same but shes always wearing a headband, sweater, skirt, and the same socks and shoes).
ford: like dipper, ford also seems to have a special interest in the supernatural, as shown by the journals. ford is also a bit socially awkward and tends to only keep a few people close. he also gets stressed when things dont turn out the way he planned. ford is also shown to have trouble with empathy and understanding others, especially stan. he doesnt understand why he does what he does, and its hard for him to grasp decisions that arent logical.
stan: honestly i dont have too much to say about stan, hes a bit stubborn but beyond that i dont think theres too much explicit evidence from what i can remember. this one is less about actual traits and more just about vibes.
soos: hes interested in a lot of tv shows and games and has a somewhat unique sense of humor. he also has trouble in social situations, the best examples being in soos and the real girl. he also has interests in things that may be considered childish, which isnt an autistic trait in and of itself, but it is common. also soos is just awesome
wendy: once again this one is more about vibes. shes just really cool
fiddleford: i have less to go on for him, but theres still a lot. fiddleford very obviously has an interest in mechanics and technology; this strikes me as especially important as a special interest because even after losing his memory he still retains lots of mechanical knowledge and skill. hes also shown both in the show and the book to be stimming a lot, specifically bouncing his leg. he also gets overwhelmed easily, which is shown a lot more in the journal.
bill: HOOO BOY now this is where it gets rambley bc bills my personal favorite and we have quite a bit in common so i'll be listing off more stuff here. obviously bill cant really be judged by human standards because hes. not one. but personally i think he has a lot of autistic traits. number one his low empathy swag. bill is like ford and has difficulty understanding others and why they do things. he also gets thrown off when things dont go his way. his dialogue also tends to be pretty blunt (hes good at being vague about his intentions but in general he doesnt really use idioms and if hes not trying to hide anything he'll usually say what he means). his speech is also relatively flat; hes basically always yelling but beyond that he isnt super expressive with how he talks, at least not in comparison to some other characters. he also does a lot of stuff that can be considered stimming, which you can see a lot in sock opera (like ive picked up several stims from stuff he does in that episode). also, weirdmageddon is just what happens when you get understimulated. You know how it is
obviously these arent the only characters who i think are autistic, but these are some of the main characters that i have a decent amount of evidence for.
#YIPEE#gravity falls#gfposting#dipper pines#mabel pines#ford pines#stan pines#fiddleford mcgucket#bill cipher#autistic#autistic headcanons#autism acceptance month
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omg idk how far along u are in the crown so pls feel free to answer this later but the press was droning ONNNNN about how both charles and diana r portrayed as equally to blame and i dont think thatās particularly true? š yes i believe diana was given a much more complex character than shes usually afforded in biopic adjacent media (i actually gasped when they let her be as charismatic as weāre often told she was irl) but that doesnt mean it was a negative portrayal? even in her more āselfishā moments, and this might just be me being biased lol, but i was fully on her side. its almost like people dont think diana can be sympathetic if she actually fights back against the the system and the people that have trapped her š this all being said i think charlesā portrayal was tooo positiveā¦. but i dont expect less from PM
Lol the press is ridiculous.
The thing is that there absolutely are people who want to put Diana up on a pedestal as this poor little girl lost who had the best of intentions but was fragile and craaaazy and only acted out because other people (not the Windsors) manipulated her poor, silly self. That is what the Windsors are putting out there. That is what the press is playing into. Fuck, that's what William put out there. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that Martin Bashir acted entirely ethically; but frankly, if it hadn't been him, Diana would've eventually said that shit to someone else (and she PRETTY MUCH DID to Andrew Morton, lmao). She was spitting mad.
And the thing is? She had a right to be. Diana was seduced into a horrible marriage with a man 12 years her senior as a literal teenager. She had two kids with the man, was continuously gaslit by him, his mistress, his entirely family, most of their social circle... She wasn't perfect, and she had mental health issues that would've likely existed without Charles, but lmao. The woman was emotionally abused by those people for like... her entire marriage. Which covered most of her adulthood. She had a right to be angry.
If you think that her reacting and acting badly in turn is like... less sympathetic, you just have a very black and white view of the world. Someone can be very kind to those in need and have a mean streak towards people they clash with. Someone can be serious about charity work and enjoy the attention. All of these things can be true, and these things all existing in one person doesn't mean they're suddenly shitty lmao. You have to evaluate people (and their behaviors) as individuals.
Idk, to me Diana being selfish at points makes me more sympathetic to her than I would be if she were just a long-suffering angel. She was a fucking human being. She was very loving to her children (and most children), she was incredibly charismatic, she genuinely cared about serious issues and did what she could to bring attention to them... She also had a partygirl streak (lmao the company she kept--Elton John, George Michael, Gianni Versace, COME ON SHEEPLE), could be self-absorbed and catty, and was very needy. She was super genuinely hurt by these people, and knew how to play her audience like a fiddle. All of this... can be true. I think she was, at heart, a good but complicated person. And I appreciate that. That's why I am so fascinated by her--she's this goddess figure in the press, but when you research her she's deeply relatable. I loved that they brought shit up like her calling her stepmother Acid Raine. Anyone who's had a shitty stepmom can relate to that.
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u always have good things to say about pds and relationships and all that. do u have any advice when u have a very hard time forming connections at all much less any secure attachment, but u lose the one person u had that with? how to keep urself from regressing with ur pd when that person helped lessen ur symptoms n u feel like u cant form it with anyone else?
thats a really relatable worry and I actually do have some advice that helped me widen my social circle so hopefully it helps for u to
I kinda consciously dissected what it was about that first person that made me feel safe and that I enjoyed and that lessened my symtpoms
I picked apart her as a person and what made me like her and made a kind of list of what traits I enjoyed and what was compatible with my needs
some of them were personality traits like having a sarcastic sense of humor, being of similar intelligence to me, having interest in weird niche information, enjoying learning about new things, playing video games, ect.
some were about ppls values, things like notices and appreciates small gestures, doesnt need a lot of constant emotional attention, is compassionate and patient with others, enjoys spending time together in ways I also enjoy like just chilling in the same room but doing our own tasks or voice chatting about our day while I cook dinner
and other parts were about how they treat others, things like is very upfront and says what they mean so I dont have to guess, speaks up when something is bothering them right away and doesnt expect me to figure it out, doesnt mind being asked for reassurance on things I'm anxious over, doesnt do behaviors that trigger me or that I find unpleasant like suicide baiting, is very openly affectionate and says they love me or care about me often
this helped me realize that it wasn't so much that I hated everyone, but rather I am very particular and picky and only enjoy a very specific kind of person. but this gave me a good guideline to realize what that was and what I was looking for in another person which made finding them so much easier. I could quickly and easily look at a group of ppl and know who I was going to enjoy and who I wasn't so I didn't waste time trying to get close to ppl I was ultimately going to hate or be incompatible with, which often would make me feel demoralized when the friendships didn't work out
hopefully that made sense and is something that could be helpful for u anon. I hope ur able to find some more people soon and have those connections again
#jack.speaks#anon#aspd#aspd tag#cluster b#cluster b personality disorder#also thank u very much for the compliment I deeply appreciate it
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What do you think someone would need to know to be able to decide if they could care for a pet pigeon or what would they need to provide? Also, what to pay attention to when getting one and where to get it from to be sure youāre not supporting anyone who is not treating pigeons well, that the pigeon is healthy and well etc?
My friends made a wonderful basic FAQ about pigeons here that may answer some of those questions
The most ethical places to get pigeons are rescues, companion breeders, show breeders who give a damn about birds and even racing lofts.
Not all racers are bad people and some are working to make racing better. Ususally they are younger adults who own those lofts but really the best way to gauge the care of the birds is to just talk to the breeder.
Avoid any mail order bulk pigeons they tend to be extremely unhealthy and traumatized due to poor handling.
Birds who are healthy will have nice smooth feathers and a meaty keel. They should be bright and alert and preening every now and again. Like Fluffernutter below
Compared to Arga who was injured, full of worms, and a little jostled from a car ride
Compared to now when she is feeling better, her eyes are brighter and her stance more upright.
Before taking on single pigeon you should know they should be free roam most of the day. Their cage should be treated the same way you would treat a dog and its crate. They should only be in there for sleeping or when you need them somewhere secure.
Pigeons are also social so if your going to be gone for long hours while working it may be better to get a pair rather then a single bird because the single bird will be lonely without someone to socialize with if you dont live alone this is less of a problem.
A pair typically wont bond with you like a single pigeon would but that doesnt mean you cant have a wonderful connection and relationship. Males of pairs love to use their humans as stages to impress their wives and may even attempt courting you for fun.
Pigeons live for a long time so its important its a responsibility your willing to take on to care for a bird its whole life.
Finding a good avain vet knowledgeable in pigeons who wont treat them like a parrot is paramount and very important as some diseases in pigeons are hard to diagnose without a vet.
Pigeons also make noise, will sometimes court humans and try to mate with hands and feet regardless of gender same thing with asking to be tread. Some people may be to freaked out by this to actually own a pigeon long term. Though their are ways to redirect the behavior if it makes you uncomfortable.
Pigeons also poop so even if your bird wears a diaper you will still have to handle poop and clean its cage so thats something to keep in mind.
In terms of feeding an houseing pigeons are very easy. They need more floor space then height so dog crates are good cages for them but so are critternation cages
Pigeons are strict grainivores so they need to eat a variety of seeds and grains along with a mineral grit and a calicum source but you could also just add a supplement to their food.
Food is as simple as a buying a bag of Economy bird seed or as complicated as making your own mixes and measurements, really its up to you and their are plenty of commerial pigeon foods to choose from.
Pigeons arent destructive and dont really play with toys to much but do like to play with cat toys like balls and crinkly paper sometimes. They get most of their enrichment from socializing with you and each other
Hopefully that gives you more of an idea!
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Gender variance and it's link with neurodivergency
Okay so this is it going to be another long one
All quotes will be sourced with a link to the scientific journal I took it from
Okay Tumblr, let's talk gender (I know, your favorite topic) my preface on why this topic matters to me is: I'm autistic ( diagnosed moderate to severe autism) I'm nonbinary trans ( in a way that most non-autistic people don't understand and actually look down on) Ā and I went to college for gender study ( Mostly for intersex studies but a lot of my research was around non-binary and trans identities) I will be using the term autism as pants when I have experience with however when ADHD is part of the study I will use ND which stands for neurodivergent and yes this is going to be about xenogenders and neopronouns.
autism can affect gender the same way autism can affect literally every part of an identity. a big thing about having autism is the fact that it completely can change how you view personhood and time and object permanence and gender and literally all types of socially constructed ideas. let me also say hear that just because Society creates and enforces an idea does it mean that it doesn't exist to all people it just me that there is no nature law saying that it's real and the ārulesā for these ideas can change and delete and create as time and Society evolves and changes. Ā gender is one of those constructs.
Now I'll take it by you reading this you know what transgender people are Ā (if you don't understand what a trans person is send me an ask and I'll type you up a pretty little essay lmao, Ā or Google it but that's a scary thought sense literally any Source or website can come up on Google including biased websites so be careful I guess LOL) anyway to be super basic trans people are anyone who doesn't identify as the gender they were assigned at Birth (yes that includes non-binary people I could do a whole nother essay about that shit how y'all keep spreading trying to separate non-binary people from the trans umbrella) Ā some people don't like to use the label and that is totally fine by the way.
now autistic people to view the world in a way differently than allistic (neurotypical) ppl do. Ā we don't take everything people teach us at 100% fact and we tend to question everything and demand proof and evidence for things before we can set it as a fact in our brains. This leads to why a lot of autistic people are atheist (although a lot of religions and this is not bashing on religious people at all I am actually a Jewish convert) Ā this questioning leads to a lot of social constructs being ignored or not understood At All by a lot of autistic people and personally I think that's a good thing. Ā allistics take everything their parents and teachers and schools teach them as fact until someone else says something and then they pick which ones to believe. autistic people study and research and learn about a topic before forming an opinion and while this may lead to them studying and believing very biased material and spitting it out as fact it can also lead them to try and Discover it is real by themselves.
because of this autistic people are more question their gender or not fall in a binary way at all as the concept of gender makes no sense to a lot of us. ā if gender is a construct then autistic people who are less aware of social norms are less likely to develop a typical gender identityā
no really look: ā children and teens with autism spectrum disorder ASD or Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder ADHD Ā are much more likely to express a wish to be the opposite sex compared with their typical developing peersā That was posted in 2014. we have been saying this stuff forever but no one wants to listen. the thing is gender variance (being not cisgender or at least questioning it) Ā has always been closely hand-in-hand with autistic and ADHD people I'm even the doctor who did that study understood right away that it all made sense the whole time: ā Dr. Strang said they were initially surprised to find an overrepresentation of gender variance among children with ADHD. However, they later realized that prior studies have shown increased levels of disruptive behavior and other behavioral problems among young people with gender varianceā Ā SEE YOURE NOT WEIRD YOURE JUST YOU AND YOURE NOT ALONE IN THIS!!
5% autistic people who did the study were trans or questioning. it was also equal between the Sexes fun fact. that may not seem like a lot till you realize that the national average is only .7% that's literally over 700% higher than the national average. That's so many! and that's just in America.
Ā in Holland there was a study in 2010 ā nearly 8% of the more than 200 Children and adolescents referred to a clinic for gender dysphoria also came up positive on a assessment for ASDā they weren't even testing for ADHD so the numbers could be even higher!
now I want to talk about a Ā certain section of the trans umbrella that a lot of autistic people fall under called the non-binary umbrella. non-binary means anything that isn't just male or just female. it is not one third gender and non-binary doesn't mean that you don't have a gender. just clearing that up since cis people keep spreading that. non-binary is an umbrella term for any of the infinite genders you could use or create. now this is where I'm going to lose a bunch of you and that's okay because you don't have to understand our brains or emotions To respect us as real people. not many allistics can understand how we see and think and relate to things and that's okay you don't have to understand everything but just reading about this could be so much closer to respecting us for Who We Are from you've ever been and that's better than being against us just for existing.
now you might have heard of my Mutual Lars who was harassed Ā by transmeds for using the term Autigender (I was going to link them but if it gets traction I don't want them to get any hate) Ā since a lot of people roll their eyes at that Ā and treated them disgustingly for using a term that 100% applied correctly. Ā Autigender Ā is described as " a neurogender which can only be understood in the context of being autistic or when one's autism greatly affects one's gender or how one experiences gender. Autigender is not autism as a gender, but rather is a gender that is so heavily influenced by autism that one's autism and one's experience of gender cannot be unlinked.ā Now tell me that doesn't sound a lot like this entire essay I've been working on with full sourcesā¦..
xenogenders and neopronouns are a big argument point on whether or not people ābelieveā in non binary genders but a big part of those genders is that they originated from ND communities and are ways that we can try to describe what gender means us in a way that cis or even allistic trans people just can't comprehend or ever understand. Same with MOGAI genders or sexualities. A lot of these are created as a way to somehow describe an indescribable relationship with gender that is so personal you really cant explain it to anyone who isnt literally the same as you.
Even in studies done with trans autistic people a large amount of them dont even fall on a yes or no of having a gender at all and fall in some weird inbetween where you KINDA have a gender but its not a gender in the sense that others say it is but its also too much of a gender so say youre agender. And this is the kind of stuff that confuses allistic trans people and makes them think nonbinary genders are making stuff up for attention, which isnt true at all we just cant explain what it feels like to BE a trans autistic person to anyone who doesnt ALREADY know how it feels.
In this study out of the ppl questioned almost HALF of the autistic trans individuals had a āSense of identity revolving around interestsā meaning their gender and identity was more based off what they liked rather than boy or girl. That makes ppl with stuff like vampgender or pupgender make a lot more sense now doesnt it? We see that even in the study: āMy sense of identity is fluid, just as my sense of gender is fluid [ā¦] The only constant identity that runs through my life as a thread is ādancer.ā This is more important to me than gender, name or any other identifying featuresā¦ even more important than mother. I wouldn't admit that in the NT world as when I have, I have been corrected (after all Mother is supposed to be my primary identification, right?!) but I feel that I can admit that here. (Taylor)ā and an agreement from another saying āMine is Artist. Thank you, Taylor. (Jessie)ā now dont you think if they grew up with terms like artistgender or dancergender they would just YOINK those up right away????
In fact āAn absence of a sense of gender or being unsure of how their gender should āfeelā was another common reportā because as ive said before in this post AUTISTIC PEOPLE DONT SEE GENDER THE WAY ALLISTIC PEOPLE SEE IT. therefore we wont use the same terms or have the same identities nor could we explain it to anyone who doesnt already understand or question the same way! Participants even offered up quotes such as āAs a child and even now, I don't āfeelā like a gender, I feel like myself and for the most part I am constantly trying to figure out what that means for me (Betty)ā and also āI don't feel like a particular gender I'm not even sure what a gender should feel like (Helen)ā
Now i know this isnt going to change everyones minds on this stuff but i can only hope that it at least helped people feel like theyre not broken and not alone in their feelings about this. You dont have to follow allistic rules. You dont have to stop searching inside for who you really wanna be. And you dont have to pick or choose terms forever because just as you grow and evolve so may your terms. Its okay to not know what or who you are and its okay to identify as nonhuman things or as your interests because what you love and what you do is a big part of who you are and shapes you everyday. Its not a bad thing! Just please everyone, treat ppl with respect and if you dont understand something that doesnt make it bad or wrong it just means its not for you. And thats okay.
#autism#actuallyautistic#trans#nonbinary#xenogenders#neopronouns#lgbtq#adhd#nuerodivergent#gender identity
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Headcanons of Krel living on earth because heās my favorite and I love him and I havenāt seen anyone do this yet so I feel like I have to
^^^^^because of this very moment I love the idea of Mary and Darci befriending Krel.
Since Aja,Vex and Eli went back to Akaridion-5, Mother was destroyed, and Claire was busy with Trollhunting stuff, earth gets pretty lonely. So Mary and Darci adopt him into their friend group.Ā
At first Krel was a little apprehensive to joining their friend group, but he quickly warmed up to it because, he, being Krel, loves the attention.
like I can totally see Mary and Darci taking Krel to like a mall or something and doing those like teen romcom movie shopping montages where he goes into a changing room and the girls judge the outfit until they find the perfect one.
I personally believe Krel would adopt a soft boy look, with like oversized button ups and t shirts tucked into jeans, but thats just me.
anyway, because heās friends with Mary and Darci, Krel has a new found social popularity in Arcadia.
because of this, Krel would prolly get nominated for Spring Fling king and shit
I would say Krel wouldnāt really care about being nominated, but seeing how he cared so much about the science fair and the Battle of the Bands, he would definitely care
Steve is conflicted because he wants to be Spring Fling King, but he canāt mess with Krel like he did with Jim and Eli cause Krel is his girlfriendās brotherĀ
Krel notices this and takes advantage of it to mess with Steve and actually tries to win.
like Krel would just dominate the contests, and his theme presentation would be the flashiest and most appealing and people would just generally like him, and that would really worry Steve
like Krel, with four arms would be really good at the Touch-a-Truck-athon or whatever its called.
Krel would prolly let Steve win anyway because watching Steve squirm and freak out over prolly losing the crown and not being able to do anything about it cause he's Aja's brother is much better than any highschool dance crown
also the school 100% asks Krel to DJ future dances and events to save money, and Krel absolutely loves it
He would also definitely do the school play. Seeing how much he enjoyed being in Toby and Eli's short film, and again, he loves the attention, he would totally be downĀ
Also it would just be another chance to mess with Steve to be the lead.Ā
Because of this, Ms. Janeth would do another Shakespearean play, but do one of those modern renditions. Like it's the same play just in a modern setting, to take advantage of Krel's Akaridion form like they did with Jim's armor.Ā
If not in the play he would do stage crew/tech.
Like he would create elaborate settings for them using A5 tech and Ms. Janeth would adore itĀ
moving on, because home life is pretty lonely with just the Lucy and Ricky for company, Krel loves to host his friends for parties and sleepovers and whatever
and since Krel lives in the coolest house on the block, they love coming over
He hosts girlās night every other week with Mary, Darci, and Clarie (becauuse she deserves a fucking break)Ā
since weāve all agreed that Krel is 100% a gaylien, I love the idea that he casually comes out during a girls night
like Mary would be like āSo Krel, are there any girls you like?ā and Krelās just like, ā*snort* Girls? Who ever said I like girls?ā and the others are like āā¦.....?ā and Krel just rolls his eyes and says "I like boys, ladiesā and theyāre like āooooohhhh, okay. Cool.ā
So now they spend girls night talking about boys. Claire and Darci about their mans and Mary and Krel about cute boys.
One day the girls give Krel a little rainbow pin and Krelās just like āwhatās this?ā And the girls tell him that itās an earth symbol for the gays and heās like ātheres a symbol for that here? I didnt think it was that big of a deal. On A5 itās pretty normalā and the girls explain why theres a symbol and heās like āoh shoot wow, thanks" and he put it on his backpack.
Heās pretty confused the first time someone is homophobic towards him cause like that kind if behavior doesnt happen on A5 and hes just like, āwhy does this bother you? I hardly know youā and just brushes it off. Its doesnt really bother him, mainly cause he doesnt know the earth insults towards gay people so he doesnāt even realize, but if the girls (or Toby, or even Steve, too) catch anyone being homophobic towards their friend they will attack that asshole on sight. Especially Mary and Steve
Random person on the street: Ha, *slur*
Marry: WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HIM BITCH???
Krel: Marry its fine, itās not that big of a dealoHSEKLOSANDGAYLENMARYGETOFFOFHIM
Marry: SAY IT AGAIN ASSHAT, I D A R E YOU
Claire and Darci: *trying to hold Mary back* maRY NO
Steve: THATS MY NINJA KICKING SPACE ANGEL GIRLFRIEND'S BROTHER BUTTSNACK I'LL END YOU
Toby: *now chasing after Steve to stop him* stEVE NO
Mary would 100% find out who the rando is and destroy their life on social media. Like she would leak their job, phone number, email, school/college (if applicable) to her thousands of followers and absolutely ruin them with no remorse. And honestly, good for her
Also whilst on the subject, Krel can not drive or cook for 2 reasons: 1. Hes gay and 2. Heās a prince so heās never had to do either before
Like he can obviously do math but thatās it.
Proof? That one scene in Wizards when Douxie had him drive the airship. You know the one.
Coach Lawrence refuses to get in a car with him at Drivers Ed after the 3rd day Krel shows up.
Krel gets addicted to sugary coffee shop-esc drinks thanks to Darci. Not coffee cause we saw in 3Below Part 1 that he doesnt like coffee, but refreshers, coolattas, frappuccinos etcā¦? Definitely.
As for warm drinks, heās more of a tea person.
Moving on
He face calls Aja everyday because he really misses her
He tells her all about school and his friends and whatever and Aja tells him about the changes sheās making to the A5 government
Thanks to the wormhole they visit each other often. Sometimes Steve tags along cause he misses his ninja kicking space queen angel girlfriend. (And Eli, but that's also for another post)
They take turns housing Luug.
Krel genuinely loves it on earth, but he hates the primitive technology so he begs Aja to send him supplies and materials for his projects.Ā
He would 10000% apply to HexTech for an after school job. Seeing his reaction to HT in Wizards and the fact that āAkaridion tech and magic are so compatibleā, he would be the perfect addition to the HT staff.Ā
The Wizards wouldnāt be sure at first but after he shows them A5 tech and Douxieās email of recommendation about the time loop thing they made together, the wizards are like āoh yeah we definitely keeping this kid. This is going to be so much fun.ā
Their inventions become more and more extravagant because Krel can and he's just extra and the wizards love it.
He would definitely find a way to use magic using A5 tech. But he would have to study magic in order to figure out how, so the wizards help him learn all about magic. And since he's learned everything there is to learn about science and technology and whatever, he's super excited to learn about something completely different and interesting. The wizards are happy to teach him. He would be the first Akaridion to learn and use magic
Like he would make his own staff with his serrator and everything. He's like "earn a staff? Nah fuck that going to make my own"
Speaking of which he really likes human swear words. But he doesnt know when it is and isn't inappropriate to say these swear words so he's gotten in trouble a few times for swearing at the wrong time
For example:
Ms. Janeth: excuse me Mr. Tarron?
Krel: what the fuck do you want?
Everyone in the room: krEL NO
Anyway, back to Krel at HT, thanks to Toby, he would definitely have a bowl of candy in his little lab. More like multiple jars of different candy just scattered around the room. Small candy like fun sized chocolate and skittles and jelly beans and whatever
And a mini fridge, of course.
Steve, Toby and Arrrgh come over to the lab alot to mess around.
Toby has a lot of sci-fi requests for Krel to make
Toby: do you think you can make a shrink ray? Laser blasters? Invisible ray? My own hoverboard? My own serrator *gASP* WITH A WARHAMMER SETTING???? WITH SPACE ARMOR TO MATCH???!!!???!
Krel: Toby you already have a warhammer and armor why do you need more?
Toby: I dont have a space warhammer and armor Krel!!!!!!
Going back to school life, I feel like Krel would take an interest in Spanish class. I mean, his human form is latino and in Trollhunters (I'm pretty sure the lightning in a bottle episode) he said "Si" in response to a question someone asked him, so I feel like he would like to learn another human language.Ā
I also feel like he would just like to learn about Latin American culture in general since Mother gave him that form. He'd like to get in touch with his human self.Ā
Claire (when she isnt busy Trollhunting with Jim and the gang) is happy help him learn about Latin American culture and help him with his Spanish.Ā
Krel, being a fast learner, becomes fluent quickly with a perfect accent.Ā
SeƱor Uhl, who already liked the Tarrons to begin with, would really appreciate this.Ā
Claire's dad would also appreciate this.
Since he has such a fascination with human music, Krel would especially love Latin American music. Specifically reggaeton, since its kind of like techno music in a way and he already likes techno music.
And naturally, he learns to dance. All the styles of latin american dances. And he becomes quite the favorite on the dance floor.
He and Claire become great dance partners cause they both have the natural Latino rhythm and because Jim respects and trusts his girlfriend he doesnt mind them dancing together at parties and stuff
Although, Jim does ask for dance help at some point cause it looks like fun and he wants to dance with his beautiful talented incredible amazing gf and Krel is happy to teach him and anyone else who wants dance help.Ā
GUITAR LESSONS with Douxie cause in 3Below Krel said he really wanted to learn how to play guitar, steals Shannonās guitar from the bonfire and is seen multiple times strumming it throughout the series. So of course this is included.
Toby introduces Krel to YouTube and Krel instantly makes his own channel.
of course his channel is called DJ Kleb and he posts his tracks and remixes. and maybe even some vlogs
its a little slow at first, only Arcadia Oaks students are subscribed to it but Mary blows it up by posting one of Krelās tracks on her own social media and now he has thousands of subscribers
he also gained other forms of social media like Instagram and Tiktok, platforms to post his music
At this point every girl in school wants to be friends with Krel but not in the toxic GBF (gay best friend) way, girls just genuinely think he's 10x more interesting than every other boy in Arcadia Oaks
I think that's it for now sorry this is really long I just really love Krel and I had so many ideas. Feel free to add on!!
#tales of arcadia#krel tarron#toa krel#3below#toa 3below#3below krel#Trollhunters#toa trollhunters#jim lake junior#jim lake jr#james lake jr#james lake junior#toby domzalski#toa jim#toa toby#claire nuƱez#toa claire#wizards#tales of arcadia wizards#toa wizards#Toa Douxie#tales of arcadia douxie#hisirdoux casperan#toa hisirdoux#toa aja#aja tarron#3below aja
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Ace attorney characters when you pack a bento box (boxed lunch) for them:
(In japan that's a indirect expression of love and in this case a confession)
Phoenix gets it right away. He smiles and blushes. And as he kisses y/n for the first time realizes he might not need to chase rivals away. Out of all of them hes probably the softest receiving a bento box. He jumps straight to calling you his girlfriend. Phoenix thinks about it all day and when he opens it come lunchtime and finds a little love note above his rice he tears up.
(Also if you make two, one for him and one for trucy he will melt)
Miles DOESNT get it right away. He doesnt understand why, when he has so much money, y/n would feel the need to pack him a lunch. He doesnt understand why his confusion causes y/n such a blush for a good five minutes. By the time he remembers the cultural significance they already left. He texts them something between sweet and formal. At noon (though I think he does have a tendency to skip lunch to work) he opens it and finds a little love note. He feels a lot of things at once and just like him ends up very smug
Franziska is silent for a second. It's not that she understands the implications, it completely flies over her head. No shes quiet cause she believes she should be taking care of you and not vice versa. Then she tells y/n to set it on the table, and is very confused when they leave the room practically skipping. It isn't until shes having lunch and her brother and gumshoe walk into the room to give her paperwork does she understand. Her brother asks her were she got it (idk if she's a good cook or would bother learning Japanese cooking) and when she relays your confounding behavior miles has the nerve to laugh. Then gumshoe surprisingly explains it to her. She turns pink and carefully opens it. Sure enough theres a love note in a sealed bag to keep it clean. That evening she buys a locket.
You have to know Diego for a very long time before he let's you cook for him. And he will never again accept open drinks from anyone. So y/n ever the sweetie invites him over in the early morning and hopes it doesnt irritate him. ( it doesnt cause hes already normally there). When he shows up y/n invites him in and leads him to the kitchen and they cook together so he can see whats in everything. He doesnt admit it but it makes him feel like they're married. It's when she hands him not his lunch but a bottled coffee still sealed does he go from crushing to love. Though he didnt like the extra sugar and milk in Japanese bottled coffee, they validated his trauma and therefore is not getting rid of him now.
Dahlia is an odd case. She pretends to not understand. She laughs her laugh like silver bells and thanks them as sweet as she can but I dont think she actually eats it. She worries shes been found out. That your trying to poison her. I can see her being better safe than sorry. Still she opens it to take a picture to post on her social media and sees the love note. She reads it once then again. And smiles sly. Her plan was working
Iris on the other hand completely understands and let's you know she knows. She asks if their seriously ok with dating someone already under oaths and vows. If thier ok respecting such boundaries. When y/n nods she begins to cry. At lunch time when she opens it she begins to cry again for two reasons
1) it's made specifically with her eating restrictions in mind. Y/n did their research
And
2) the love note. Oh goodness the love note. Never before has such a small paper made a girl so happy.
Wocky feels guilty that you pulled the bento thing first. His parents are Japanese and run a cafe and he couldn't make you a bento. When he voices his concerns and they take it as him accepting the confession and kiss him he feels a little better. He normally eats what his parents make for lunch but today. Is different. When he finds the love note he cries. He feels safe with s/o for the first time. Alita never wrote love notes or cooked lunches.
Mia the sweet women she is, flushed but tries to stay somewhat level headed, somewhat her normal level of cool. She sets it on her desk and takes y/n into her arms. She doesn't ask if they mean it cause shes scared they dont. That...it would destroy her, so she doesnt give them a chance. She would return the favor the next day but imagine be honest. I dont think she can cook either. She keeps the love note with everything else that reminds her if y/n. In a jewelry box under a floorboard.
Klavier doesnt understand it.... Much like franziska, he has no clue. But In a way he does? He knows this is something y/n put time and effort and money into, all for him. So he accepts it, calling y/n beautiful in the process. He doesnt get the fact that it was a confession...at first. Then he Googles what it means and sure enough it was a confession. And hes relieved cause he had accepted it and complimented them. He had agreed to their confession.
(before anyone says it, yes, I know Kristoph isnāt actually German, but I donāt care. Capcom can rip myĀ āthe Gavins are Germanā headcanon from my cold, dead hands)
Aight, so, ya girl is back. Iām gonna keep the ask box closed for a bit until I clear out all the asks I have (and finish a request) so please be patient. Thank you!
Damon: Doesnāt get it right away, but thinks itās sweet that you made him lunch. He may google it later assuming he knows how to use google or ask someone about it, which is how he finds out the meaning behind it. Rather than make you a bento box in return, heāll get you a bouquet of roses and invite you to join him for dinner instead. Between the roses, though, youāll find a cute little love note with a smiley face scribbled onto it.
Shelly: Heās been around the block a few times, so he likely knows what it means. Heāll thank you and give you a peck on the cheek, promising to make you lunch as well. Once he finishes eating, heāll put the note somewhere safe so he can reread it whenever he wants.
Matt: Has a security guard try it before he does, for safety reasons. Once he sees how upset you are by that, heāll apologize and ask you to explain the meaning behind it (he knows he fucked up lmao). After you explain it, heāll apologize (while being so fucking smug internally) and thank you for the lunch. He canāt cook to save his life, so donāt expect him to return the favor, but he will leave you a little note where you can find it; something along the lines ofĀ āI love you, dude <3ā.
Kristoph: Prides himself on knowing a little about everything, so for him not to know the meaning behind your gift is unlikely. Heāll happily accept it and give you a gentle kiss on the forehead, all while hiding how smug he feels. Heāll also give you bento box in return, but with German cooking instead of Japanese. Oh, and that little love note you put in there? Expect to find a three page-long love letter in your lunch.
Ray:Ā Pretty knowledgeable about romantic traditions around the world, so the chances of him getting it are pretty high. Heāll thank you for it rather sheepishly, as this is one of the few times youāll get to see him flustered. Once he reads the note, though, heāll pull you into a big hug, tears brimming at the corners of his eyes. Afterwards, heāll immediately set out to make you a bento box in return, or take you out to dinner if you prefer.
Sebastian: Bless his dense heart, heās clueless. Heāll be very thankful though, and promise to make you something in return (despite his nonexistent cooking skills). Heāll likely eat it at work and brag about how you made it for him, which is when Miles steps in to explain the meaning behind it. That + the love note is enough to make him cry tears of joy, and heāll tackle you in a hug the moment he gets the chance to.
Simon K: Doesnāt know how to feel at first because heās never had someone make him lunch before. Once he sees the note inside, though, he realizes what it means and becomes even more emotionally confused than before. Heāll thank you, rather awkwardly, and promise to make something for you. Heļæ½ļæ½s not much of a wordsmith but heāll still add a note, expressing how grateful he is for the lunch.
Katherine:Ā Will be on the verge of tears when you give her the bento box, and will flat-out start crying when she reads the love note. Sheāll cling to you, thanking you profusely and promising to make you one as well. She keeps her word and makes you a wonderful bento box the very next day. Instead of a love note, however, youāll receive a song she wrote about you (and sheāll even sing it to you while you eat).
Bobby:Ā Another very dense yandere who is definitely going to get scolded by Blackquill for not understanding what your gift means. Heāll make up for it though, by going above and beyond to make you the best bento box youāve ever eaten (it wonāt be the prettiest and heāll likely have burned something, but itās the thought that counts, right?). Heāll also keep your love note on his bedside table so he can read it every night before bed and every morning when he wakes up.
Simon B: Heās a huge weeaboo Japanese cultural enthusiast, so heāll get it right away. Heāll tease you about it and act cocky as usual, but in reality, heās trying to hide the very obvious blush on his face. Heāll keep your note safely tucked away in his coat pocket for whenever he wants to reread it. He wonāt return the favor right away, though. Instead, heāll give it to you when you least expect it in order to fluster you.
______
- Mod Dollie
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ā š ; a love letter from @kyriaan
long post below regarding broken records. cw includes adultery, physical assault, toxic relationships, broken records spoilers, and mature content
[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005
Okay! I finally had time to actually sit down and properly read chap 5 cause ill be damned and burned if i dont pay special attention to one of my favorite series here! Rather drown or be sting by bees slowly š
šššššš I for the first time don't even know where to start so allow me to be all over the place cause my emotions are also all over the place with this chapter āļø
Ill start by y/n's dad caN GO FUCK HIMSELF? Like okay sir you might have fallen in love with our mom (ill give him the benefit of the doubt regarding his feelings) BUT SIR YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN HONEST? FROM THE BEGINNING? ALSO BRUH YOU KIDDING ME??? SIR YOU LEGIT ABANDONED YOUR OTHER DAUGHTER AND THEN YOU PROCESS TO 'LEAVE US' I- YOOOOO I WOULD BITCH SLAP HIM I SWEAR!!
Also ALSO ILL SCREAM FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK NO KID HAS EVER TO BE BLAMED FOR BEING BORN!! Y/n mom's line: 'we have to atone for our sins' its legit BULLSHIT it wad NOT y/n fault her DAD COULDNT KEEP HIS DICK INSIDE HIS PANTS NOR ITS Y/N FAULT THAT HER DAD CHEATED!!! ATONE FOR OUR SINS MY ASS!! the father is the one that has to take responsibility for all this shitty situation we do NOT nor any kid out there in this situation has to be taken accountable by this!!
And now Suna š„ŗš„ŗš„ŗš„ŗš„ŗ bruh im just gonna cry... Everything he does just makes me heart swell i feel so cozy when i read his parts like how sweet and present he is I- bruh I never had that... Actually seeing y/n breaking up with him when shes clearly falling in love with him just breaks me cause Girl for real Suna would be there for you... I get it shes afraid and shes acting on that fear but girl... Pls he truly loves you deeply not everyone is like your dad. There are happy endings. There are good people Sunas one of them pls š„ŗš„ŗš„ŗ also MY LOVE TSUMU BEING A SUPPORTIVE FRIEND EVEN THO SUNA GOT THE GIRL BRUH TSUMU I FUCKING LOVE YOU MY CHILDISH YET ADORABLY SMUG BOY ššššš
Nagisas a bitch btw āļø so far i see no redemption not excuse in what she did so far. I get her reasons but that does NOT excuse her behavior. She has to lash out at her cunt of a dad not at a innocent woman who was also a victim all along. Nor even her half sister. I get her mentality behind this but doesnt excuse her behavior at all- its basically the same as being a victim from a bully and playing bully after aswell.
Overall YOU MADE ME CRY AGAIN SUKI! I LOVE YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS BUT ALSO UGH MY HEART SUKI!
[ from suki ]Ā
BROKEN RECORDS IS UR FAVE SERIES??? babe pls youāre gonna me cry !! nah nah fr his dishonesty caused all this mess. YEAHA SAKLAA tbh I love mama lucy but her words of āatoning for their sinsā or her mindset of āwe donāt deserve to be happy when weāve hurt othersā really messed up YN. she was only 21 and vulnerable with all the shambles happening in her family + the sudden assault from nagisa, that when her mother said those words, she struggled to let go of it. to her, it became like a final verdict that dictated how she lived her life.
SUNA URGHHH PLEASE GIVE SUNA A CHANCE HE HAS PURE AND GOOD INTENTIONS BUT I CANT BLAME HER EITHER AHSJAKA. and the comparison of nagisa being a bullyās victim only to become the next bully is true. nagisa should lash out at their shitty excuse of a father. ALSO AAAAHH THE NEXT CHAPTER (007) IS WORSE AHSJKAAL
[ from the ask ]Ā BROKEN RECORDS ; track 005
I know shins attractive I mean mans perfect?? Does he even have any flaw?? And the way he cried when he got his jersey MYGOD FHDHFHFJSKS but I still look at him and im like.... Hmmmm nah i wouldnt date him its just not my... Do i dare say type? Cause i dont think i have a type ghfhfisofbd but like I just š§āāļø
I love him i just dont love him i guess
The makeout scene tho ill give you that š„µš„µš„µ made me bark (i would still walk out next day like was a good fuck kita byeeeeššāāļøšØ)
... More drama regarding mari... And you said this will have like 10 chapters... And from 8 on will be angsty.... š *traumatized noises*
[ from suki ]Ā
YUUHHH KITA IS PERFECT HERE AHSJKAA IDK MAYBE ITS MY SIMPING FOR NAOYA CONVERTED TO KITA ALREADY BEING PERFECT AS HE ALREADY IS AND I AMPED IT UP BCOS THE SIMP MODE IS ACTIVATED AHSKAA. the make out scene !! pls sir iām on my knees spare some love in ur heart AAAAAAHHHHHH. also. i assure you. businessman! kita got game. heās gonna make you walk funny if you give him the chance HSJKA
yeah i just finished writing the outline for track7 right now and the drama is HSJKAA it gave me a headache sobsĀ
[ from the ask ] BROKEN RECORDS ; track 006
I want to give you my usual thoughts on the new chapter and at the same ahm...
I just saw myself on Suna... Deeply....and it kinda slapped me harder than i was expecting...there were too many things from him giving himself to mari/treating her like he wants to be treated... To deleting his best friend from social media thanks to his girlfriend... And it really hurt me ahah..
I would vent but.. Yeah
But yes this chapter i saw myself in suna and i had to take quite the long breaks cause it was getting to me š
š
š
also if anything i learned from my experiences is that MARI SCREAMS RED FLAGS and even Osamu can see that pls
I would honestly end Mari there, i wouldnt even bother to just retort i would walk my way into to the damn apartment and fucking take Suna for myself cause Mari does not deserve him. Shes manipulative, and in a way abusive.. Not allowing him to keep contact with his best friend his a total redflag and o know its because Suna had feelings for y/n and vice versa but Suna never gave het a reason to distrust him.
The moment he said he was best friends with y/n and was single she immediately clinged himself to him and for what? To then dump him like he was trash...
He gave himself to her, he proved he was there for her he even took her back this boy deserves the fucking world and its not Mari...
I kinda want to say it's not y/n at this point either cause the way she broke his heart was kinda the same Mari did.. Y/n disregarded his feelings and just broke it up.. Mari disregarded his feelings abd broke it up... But y/n stated from the very beginning that she would eventually break up Mari just shrugged and didn't care so i can in a way forgive y/n i cant forgive mari
Besides y/n was supportive from the beginning while Mari was obsessive and controlling.
Another really insanely well written chapter as usual (albeit this one making me ball my eyes off harder because yeah) but yes~ eagerly waiting for the next one~
Take your time tho šš
Mari can go fuck off ššššā£ļøā¤ļøš§”ššššš¤š¤š¤šÆšššš
Suna x y/n pls
Y/n deserves to have a healthy love life with someone she loves (hence why npt Kita) and loves her back
And Suna deserve the fucking world and be treated right
[ from suki ]Ā
NAHHHH cuz when you said suna was treating mari the way he wanted YN to treat her... thatās right. on point. theyāre all so complicated sobs. MARI IS A WALKING RED FLAG THAT OSAMU CAN SMELL FROM A MILE AWAY. ALSO yes mari is manipulative and borderline possessive when it came to suna. like yeah, letās be real, she could tell a long time ago that suna was in love with YN and it made her insecure / jealous, but the whole time, YN kept her distance. she was supportive over their relationship from afar as to make mari comfortable. suna also did everything he could to make sure she was well cared for. for three years, he was focused on her and only her. he gave love a second chance despite being brokenhearted. suna never mari a chance to doubt because he, too, was sure he could be happy with her.
until mari left him.
and now suna is back with YN because they will always have each other. but honestly,,,if we think about it, if mari never broke up with suna or at least gave him the chance to explain himself - if mari didnāt do the exact thing YN did to suna years ago - he honestly wouldāve been really happy with mari. they were going well. like yeah mari has always been toxic by pushing sunaās boundaries and asking him to unfollow his own best friend on social media, but he did it anyway. because he trusted their relationship. he wanted the best for them.Ā
also yeah, the parallels between mari and YN were intentional !!Ā
HEHEHEHE THE KITA X YN SHIP everyone loves them im so happy about that bcos kita is so amazing in my eyes. PREACH FOR THAT THO !! SUNA DESERVES THE BEST. SUNA DESERVES TO BE TREATED RIGHT. HE DESERVES THE WORLD AND SO MUCH MORE
thank you for taking the time to send me this, kya, it means a lot to me and it motivates me to work harder on the future chapters !! <33
#asks with naoya's trophy wife#besties#series ( broken records )#tw: physical assault#tw: toxic#tw: toxic relationships#tw: adultery
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