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a;sdlkfj;akldsjf i'm finally making my order requests for flava2 merch and after doing so many of these forms i'm getting so mixed up
like all the products are on one main page so i need to put in the item name and then character name, something like this for samatoki acrylic stand
but i almost just requested a price quote like this
just. samatoki lmao
#thankfully i caught it in time and fixed it lol#anyway. debating whether i should try to get the bread......#idk if they would ship it to me#i'm thinking i will... pass... on the towels this time#because all the others i've already bought are literally just sitting in a drawer#NO idea how to display them#and i'm not a fan of how samatoki's hand is cut off on the print of this one#like understandable. the towel is the size that it is#but not my favorite. and i wouldn't get only ichiro so#might just skip this round entirely#THE NEW NUIS. ARE THE MAIN THING. OF COURSE#they are... so cute......
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Cove every time he talks about being uncomfortable In social settings/not being able to properly express his feelings because they become too much for him:
Me: I know what you are (autistic)
#our life#olba#misty talks our life#olba cove#cove holden#i feel like not many people in fhe fandom bring up cove's autism which is a real pity considering 90% of his character#it's his autism fjskkskskdjs#like oh yeah the guy has tendecies lf going out without telling people he gets excited when you bring up the ocean and he needs to active#learn how to put himself in social situations#also he takes a very long time to socialize with people and becoming friends with them#i need to make a post about this but drive happiness and charity really display those aspects#cove: yeah im going to google how to make someone happy bc i have no idea how w/o fhe help of the adults in my life#me: oh my god.........
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in remembrance of all deceased transgender individuals who have been misgendered through paleontology
trans liberation does not stop with death insp by @sweatermuppet
#i work at a museum and im just. thinking a lot about how plaques around the world say “skeleton of a young girl”#or “bones of a [blank] year old man”#the idea that there are probably so many trans people on display with incorrect gender is just. haunting. i feel for them.#even those who have been misgendered on their gravestones. immortalized incorrectly.#if someone found my bones in the woods science would call me a girl and tag me as such and that just does Not sit right with me#i understand it can be a necessity for certain research but language really really matters. my sex and my gender are not the same#my bones do not determine my identity#trans art
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forced birthers think penetration is inherently dehumanizing. they think that because you let a man's penis inside you that you've surrendered yourself. you must passively carry his child because your body is no longer your own. penetration is domination and that's why they will never see women as fully human, because we only exist to eventually be taken by a man. none of the arguments about when life begins matter because the woman's life was never really hers to begin with.
#again the idea that sex is something done TO women#she is an object to be acted upon#and idk how to possibly convey to these people that women have human will#they'll argue that consent to sex is consent to pregnancy but pregnancy never guarantees birth anyway#so their problem is the choice#they want to punish women for choosing what is and is not allowed inside them#they don't see sex as intimacy between two equals it's a power display
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Sesskag Fluff Week Day 1 // Friendship
Are you unwell, Miko?
#sesskag#sesskag fluff week#skfw24#sesshoumaru#kagome#yoart#I’ve forgotten how to draw them#ok I��m cooking lemme cook lol lemme get back in the zone#my interpretation of ‘’a moment of understanding between two people’’#I was blending all the ideas for this one trying to think of platonic displays lol#and I thought oh friends take care of each other when they’re sick!#but like you know ‘’friends :)’’#my art
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Sparkstember Day 11: Angst In My Pants (The Decline And Fall Of Me)
Album two of two in the series of Sparks' immaculate new wave releases! Iconic in every way imaginable from the music to the artwork to ONE music video. I think it's more musically (and lyrically!) varied and mature in tone (besides... a couple exceptions. Yes, an album called Angst In My Pants) than its predecessor, which is a very good development. These songs will leave you chuckling and bopping along and also pondering the intricacies of human existence. Ok, maybe that's a bit of a stretch, but it can't be denied that behind much of the earnestness and theatricality here, there's lots of quite emotional, introspective and thought-provoking stuff to be found.
Thematically, this album goes everywhere. One moment we are in Sextown U.S.A, the next we're visiting Disneyland, California where we make friends among people and animals. On a more serious note though, I think the biggest emotional whiplash one could experience between different songs on an album is between Mickey Mouse and Sherlock Holmes. And yet there's still a very prominent element of humour, even in those songs that are on the more serious or dramatic end of the scale.
I said a few days ago that I'd try to return to the topic of Sparks' brand of humour and how it works, but I don't feel intelligent enough to analyse that today. And I'm pretty sure that from what I've seen, Other People And The Maels Themselves (Said It Better Than Me). So instead, as a little send-off, please remember: if a mouse can be special, well, SO CAN YOU!!! 🫵
Favourite songs (and other highlights):
Angst In My Pants: literally no other song like this one in this world. I can't tell why that is but it's just. So great
I Predict: I had a weird kind of effect where I heard this song in my early days of Sparking and it felt VEEERY familiar to me. I think it was due to the genre / style here, it reminded me of something specific, at first I thought it was very glam rock but I'm pretty sure that this is not it but something else (and I don't know what to call it in that case!). Anyway, banger song
Tarzan And Jane: whoa wait, am I already skipping to the third-to-last song on the tracklist?? I guess I am. This one's great and one of my early favs too (I wonder how long it will take until I run out of things to say about my fav songs and it all just becomes this list of 'it's very good and I like it a lot. next.')
The Decline And Fall Of Me: it's great!! I like it!! And, of course, "check out my pizzas"
Eaten By The Monster Of Love: personal reasons that lead to a printed and framed mini-comic of my making appearing on my desk, which features some of the lyrics of this song, which caused me to have it permanently stuck in my head for a pretty long period of time. And this way I ended up liking it much much more than I did in the beginning, when it still seemed somehow pretty unremarkable to me
#i probably should have been putting these under a read more from the start. welp.#not very happy with this post idk really what my vision here was. but if i try to rewrite it i will start progressively losing my mind#so please accept this mess today. ability to articulate my thoughts died a final death i think#i hope that the tone of a Slightly Annoying Music Reviewer Who Tries to Appear Smart Yet Cool#that i accidentally put on here. is at least somewhat enjoyable#i think that someone who actually loves angst might be a better person to talk about why it's so good#i like it a lot but in a more 'acknowledging its brillance and respecting that deeply' way#nothing negative to say about it! it's just not a personal favourite. and yet i still find it so great on some fundamental level#oh and credit to @carcarrot for the idea of how a collection of frozen pizzas could be displayed hehehe#sparkstember 2024#my art#goose monologues#edit: ok i guess tumblr decided that it'll just post scheduled posts instead of saving them when i edit them#so have an early post in that case (i already had to delete it and make it again bcs of this yesterday ugh)
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"this man, is weird.. CRAZY weird.." "he was always very bright.."
#i think abt this soo often u have no idea#no one understands them like i do.. sighh..#platonic or romantic idc There is something Happening there#this also implies that sammy doesn't hate norman/displays some form of positive feeling towards him#bc it's shown in canon that he doesn't rlly like many ppl in the studio#and despite sammy's descent into insanity norman still appreciated him for who he was#they way norman talks abt sammy in his first audio log feels so personal too#probably kicked his feet and giggled abt him idk man#like okaayy what u kno abt him pooks... something u wanna tell me.. twirls my hair/..#IM SO ILL OH MY GODDDDDDDD#CAN ANYONE HEAR ME#i could go on a full 2 hour youtube rant abt how tragic they are#both together and as separate people#and dont even get me STARTED on the reason for norman's heart obsession while in the cycle and why he collects them#UGGHHHHHHHH KICKS THE WALL PUNCHES THE FLOOR I HATE THE FLOOR#been mentally ill about them since 2017 ❤ we up#at least until my pea sized 8 yr old child brain found out normmy was a thing#finding that shitty ms paint ship art changed my life..#theyre literally my og otp 5eva nothing will top them ever#smushing their faces together like barbies type shit#i do wish they had some kind of interaction actual gameplay wise in batim (or even batdr)#idc what kind i just need to see them in the same room together interacting in some way#batim#bendy and the ink machine#normmy#sammy lawrence#norman polk#norman x sammy#rosey rambles#I LOVE DOOMED YAOI
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I just got a bit more time in my schedule and I'm hoping to get started on a Sayers-and-Jews reading list, if anyone has any suggestions! I just really feel like I've never seen anyone talk about how WEIRD the apparent received wisdom is of "Sayers was in a relationship with a completely secular Jew who tried to convince her to have premarital sex she was religiously uncomfortable with, which NATURALLY made her start writing about Jews, but a totally different kind of basically fetishized ultra-conservative type than Cournos was." There are clearly missing links there- not an obvious or intuitive connection at all- and I have my own ideas of what they are and am so curious if it's already been written about.
#dorothy l sayers#lord peter wimsey#whose body#i think the main connecting factor is religious conservatism#and sayers displaying a kind of christian philosemitism that is genuinely fascinating#an idealization of jews as an almost purer throwback#backward and benighted (bc no jesus) but also in some ways uncorrupted by “modernity” for some reason#in terms of how she'd get it from cournos#he DID have some interesting ideas about jews and christians#(wrote an article about how jews should be more into jesus)#but my guess is that the christian philosemitism came first#and the connective tissue is her encountering a jew who didn't fit that kind of odd religious ideal of them#and then deciding to construct a bunch that do#idk#it's the only thing that makes sense to me#that scene in busman's honeymoon where peter asks the repo man what he thinks of christian home life and the repo man says “not much”...#imo that says a LOT#i should say that it can't be overstated how almost fetishistic and full of artistic license her portrayal of jews is#the jews she knew irl were largely secular so where did she get this nonsense#she has to have known that jews didn't do ARRANGED MARRIAGES FROM BIRTH like she depicts in piscatorial face of the stolen stomach#so like something is going on#to be clear#and this is part of what's weird#i don't mean “conservative” or “traditional” in a religious sense in the way that old fashioned caricatures often use#but instead conservative morally#which is if anything weirder and just makes it feel even more like sayers is juxtaposing some idealized morality and conservatism onto jews
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Spinel's relationship with Blacky really gained layers, I'm kind of fascinated.. the thought that they live in their world only they can understand.
#anyway thinking of their dynamics and it's so fascinating..#the way spinel patted blacky's head at the beginning because he is usually so affectionate when they are alone#and the closeup on blacky's eyes.. which seemed to indicate that blacky knew what was coming#and that spinel probably explained the situation beforehand#the way spinel used rakurium on blacky and thanked her afterwards and said 'ご苦労様、休みなさいブラッキー' and sounded so soft..#i love the idea that loving spinel or being loved by him comes with pain or the potential acceptance of it..#and that such a thing comes with the trust and strength of that relationship..#spinel is messy so it makes sense his main partner reflects him on such a level in a way.. they really fit each other#loving spinel comes with potential pain and being hated by him means he'll try to make you suffer#either way being involved with him is a bad idea <3 i love it#at first i wondered why spinel used the rakurium on blacky given that this is his closest pkmn#and then i was like.. it's specifically because it's blacky that he wouldn't have trusted anyone else with this test#he knew blacky would be able to withstand the effects to an extent and wouldn't turn on him#this is how the strength of their trust in each other is displayed..#'this will be beneficial for both of us in the long run and i know you can withstand it' or something#messy and twisted loyalty... but strangely fitting for them both#it's their little world and they can understand each other#interesting to me how they are exploring different things with the explorers and their pkmn#anyway.. the idea that spinel and blacky have a genuine attachment to each other#which makes the twisted parts even more unsettling etc#i have more things to think about now#spinel#character notes#episode notes#hz064
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i am so tired of female characters being inherently written as ‘terrifying’ or ‘scary’ w no respect to their characterisation.
for one, it feels so fake. i know so many women irl (i am one!!!) and there are very few, of any, that i would categorise as ‘scary as is’. heck, even if we go by tempers—the numbers just don’t match.
but somehow in fics, every single woman is a terrifying force of nature bc that’s…somehow…the only way we can think of women? idk?
and also just, it’s such a two dimensional characterisation that i only see w the female characters. all men aren’t angry and hex-happy and scary all the time. they’re affable, chill, respond to situations thoughtfully instead of always resorting to violence.
i think it also bothers me bc the anger thing flows neatly into the v gendered carefree man child/stuck up fun sponge stereotypes that so many relationships are forced into. it’s just an icky dynamic all around.
and lastly,,,i don’t think it’s even normal for a character to be latently terrifying everyone all the time??? unless it’s a specific quirk of theirs??? like women aren’t dementors bro chill tf out
#i just get. so frustrated by how women are written#and ofc this isn’t just limited to fics#all books have these gendered tropes#and i get so annoyed#the whole thing anger also#is it just feels so disingenuous#bc womanhood & anger (and performing/displaying it) is so complicated bc of socialisation n patriarchy#women are simultaneously not allowed to be angry and portrayed as screechy harpies#and so when characters are written like that it just seems to reinforce these ideas#clearly it bothers me a lot haha#u just can’t escape it ykno? that’s my issue#it makes it’s way into writing on such a subconscious level#and people think they’re writing a strong female character#when really they’ve just introduced someone with anger issues#like. it’s NOT normal to always be scared of someone and their reactions ok?#and it’s not okay for women to always be parenting the people (men) around them#constantly checking to see if something is dangerous or if they’re fucking up or do all the responsible things like#how can u not see ur reproducing gendered notions of personality 😭😭#like plssss#and it’s fiction!!!#we are writing about magic and fantasy#but it’s hard for us to conceive of an alternative perception of womanhood? be so fr bruh#like. i guess what i’m getting at. is that women are also just. People. ykno? we can write them normally#just look at the woman around u for one and you’ll get so many ideas 😭#even if we just take anger#9 times out of 10 a fem character will be screaming and hexing and throwing her weight around#but you can be angry in so so many ways#and u can even be someone who doesn’t GET angry. not in such a way. who can’t hold a grudge.#just. i really wish we diversified the way we wrote women. s’all.#pen’s yapping
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last night I dreamt u had a discord server where u chatted and played games with ppl and one popular game was Mister Mixer but whenever You didn’t do well it commented on it and You always called the game “Mister Meanie!!” and it was so fucking cute I felt the urgent need to share HSHDJDJFFJK
u know i got the goofiest smile on my face rn cause when i read this my first thought was 'awww, you were dreaming about me?' thats pretty cute 🩷
BUT LOOK I FOUND IT. I FINALLY FUCKING FOUND IT.
for the longest time, back when vtubers were popping off, i had this idea of a vtuber who's a criminal that's running away from the police. and you know how vtubers change their model every other month? thats her way of changing disguises and chat gets to choose what disguise she would wear n shit. and i know they have elaborate backstories as to why they started streaming but hers basically is just cause she's a little shit and wants to rub on the cops faces that they can't catch her. hiatuses? that means she's in jail again.
that's all i can remember at the top of my head :D i think i had a few more ideas but i never wrote them down so i guess it's lost forever. rip
#her emoji would be this 🔗 or this⛓️#with the amount of vtubers that exist now i wouldnt be surprised if theres already one thats similar to my idea#isnt luca kaneshiro a mafia boss or something?? idk ive never watched his streams#i /did/ do an ig live back in my old acc. i played papas freezeria or some shit but half of the time i just spent saying hello to#the people who entered cause it would display their name and i wanted to welcome them LMAODOADO#while i like the idea. this project will probably be in the back burner for a while since learning how to do vtuber shit takes a long time#franswers#angel
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And here is the bull himself >:)
+ lore notes
I was like, ah I should make the shadow something interesting, and then I'm like GIVE HIM BULL HORNS???? OKAY SURE !!!!! I'm glad such thoughts can strike at 7 in the morning....thanks brain. But hehehe I'm glad bcs now this matches up super well with the Nando one!
New ship dynamic: who's the bull and who's the matador :)
I think, in this AU, Fernando is generally pretty fond of Seb when he first meets him. Like "ah yes my very own protégé, very nice, I shall mold him in my image." But then Seb starts veering off that course. Bullfighting is all about being dramatic, but Seb maybe has a bit too much(🤏) flair for the dramatic. This escalation starts while he's still Fernando's assistant but he keeps it generally at bay. But god when he becomes a matador himself, he's just off the rails insane.
Bullfighting, to me, is a sport about reckless endangerment of one's self in the pursuit of drama and performance(its literally described as a tragedy in three acts.) But Fernando thinks Seb endangers himself *too* much, not because he cares or anything, but he's making a mockery of the sport!! Especially when Seb starts doing that bull hand symbol(seen above), Fernando just keeps become more enraged with him, not anything to do with the fact that Seb is threatening his records and threatening his own wellbeing, nah of course not.
Seb's gesture is making a mockery of the sport, he's disrespecting the culture, the very nature of it, blah blah blah. Jenson once asks Fernando, after noticing him seething while watching Seb do his gesture, "Which bull are you really trying to defeat?" One could also describe Fernando and Seb's relationship as a "tragedy with three acts."
Anyways Fernando gets very tied up with this rivalry. Even after suffering a severe injury(I have yet to decide, but y'know mchonda electrocution core), he quickly returns to the sport, loath to let Seb get any more headway. And then Seb gets injured, poor little sweet Seb, and neither of them can handle it. Though I already covered this in my prev lore post 🤭 and I think I put it pretty viscerally there so!! I digress.
They're both matadors, but the bull itself is not the only bull Fernando wants to conquer. Conquer as in death? Hm.
#i love matador au all my homies love matador au#<- its a lot of fun for me to draw and easy to have ref for :) so its like my little comfort drawings#even tho i want to sob every time i write any of the lore down bcs it is so </3#ah i just like how visceral it is ig#f1 is a dangerous sport but bullfighting is just. such another level of maniacs 😭#ive talked abt this a lot w cofi lmao its just super interesting to me. just the whole mentality and display and culture of it#also just: trajes de luces go brrrrrrr#ah one day ill draw both of them in green suits 🤭🤭#i had a chibi art of this au i was working on bcs i didnt have mental energy for a full thing#or at least i THOUGHT so#ive had the refs for this since 2 wks and im like YOU WILL FINISH THIS bcs i rly liked the pose 😭#so then i just drew for like 5 hours straight. yknow as one does#and wrote this post at uh. 8 am. normal time for one to be drawing and writing. as one does.#WELL ANYWAYS PLEASE ENJOY MATADOR SEB#this au grips me the throat 😭 i rly enjoy it 😭#i have a lot of thoughts ab the au lore itself but also drawing these is very no thoughts head empty <3#also god side note. pink stockinks. i hated the idea of them at first. but now im like hehe hot pink time 🥰🥰#its crazy how it doesnt clash that much??? i thought it would ruin the outfit but ah they suit everything p well#f1#formula 1#sebastian vettel#catie.art.#matador au
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I don't think I've seen anyone go into what physical symptoms Sonic experienced as a werehog. Have I posted abt that before I feel like I might've done that
Anyway here's a list of the symptoms of Sonic's werehog form, since I don't see many hcs abt that
Faster fur, quill, and nail growth
Increased body temperature
Increased appetite and intense cravings (not specifically for meat, but for foods he enjoys)
Sensitivity to light, sounds, and smells (easily overstimulated)
Chronic headaches
Joint and back pain due to changed bone structure
Toothaches, also due to changed bone structure
Muscle tears from transforming
Sore throat from vocal chords changing
Blood turned green (like Dark Gaia's blood)
Most of these don't fully go away when he turns back. During Unleashed, the pains lingered post-transformation and made it hard to get up in the morning a lot
Post-Unleashed, Sonic still deals with his fur, quills, and nails growing much faster than average. His bone structure in normal form is slightly different now too. His joints still hurt a bit because of it, especially his knees. Also his teeth are a lot sharper (not just fangs, all of his teeth)
#ramblings#i'm. not the only one with hcs abt this specific thing right#anyways rejoice werehog hcs be upon ye#these hcs also apply to rue but i'm not tagging them bc the post isn't abt them lol sorry rue ily#i think ppl tend to focus more on how his mind is/could be altered by this form#which is all fine and good but i like to think abt the physical effects it has on him too#in fact i like the idea that any mind/personality changes he displays don't come from dark gaia directly altering his mind#but as a reaction to the physical symptoms#like him being more irritable bc he's stressed from the pain and hunger that comes with the transformation#or he's less focused than usual bc he's overstimulated and has a hard time thinking bc of a headache#that kinda thing#bc ppl aren't usually like themselves when they're sick y'know
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GOT ACCEPTED INTO A LOCAL CON.. BABY'S FIRST ART MARKET
#Boothing#Going to have a new tag now.. What a beautiful day.#Excuse the tone switch. The description is us being blurry but I (Chara) am truly the one in front.#Wow! What joy. =) Haha. Patron of the Arts do not worry about us not having inventory yet...#But I am very excited to wake up tomorrow to pay for the booth fee and finally get our gears running for our inventory and displays.#This is what we have been doing our Pride animals for. It has always been for a dream like this:#Which is to say‚ selling them physically at an art market.#Oh. Oh my goodness. The Wheelchair sticker will be real.. The Pride Animals will be real everyone.#Not just a redbubble idea. An actual design that has coloured borders or borderless designs because WE want them to.#Sitting there with other artists and making friends. Accepting tips and making jokes with everyone.#Joy joy joy.#We plan on turning the whole thing into a small documentary for our personal self that we will upload to Youtube after PotA is over.#If anyone is interested in our future highs and lows...#The funny thing is.. I wonder how everyone will react to our art style changing every now and then in our booth. Haha!#“Why is your art style for this print different from this other print”#Well you see.. I have something called.. Dissociative Identity Disorder my friend.#Oh also! We are going to be selling Palestine related stickers for people to buy in a PWYW system with a minimum price.#So it will be our way of giving as well as other people can knowingly support the people in Gaza in an easier way.#We haven't posted anything related to this yet because we want to finish the entire set. We have ideas in mind since we wanted to avoid#using text/words and instead use symbols like animals and plants or objects.#Haha our catalogue will hopefully be varied enough for people.#I wonder if it will be too diverse... We also worry about the opposite problem where people might not 'follow us' because our style changes#too much to 'follow for'... hm.. Well that is a problem for them‚ not me‚ I should say. =)#From Chara#Mod Stuff
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have no fear, I came back with a positive post to make up for yesterday's complaining!
#my mentor gave me a super good review for something new we're working on#(like said i did better than anyone else in this role ever did on their first try which is good enough for me!)#also was dicking around on my laptop today and found out i have a bunch of free dropbox space for the next year#which is cool because i'll never PAY for dropbox but i can always use another 100gb#(ignore how stressed i'm gonna be when it expires and i have to relocate all those files bc it'll be cool up to that point)#i'm also trying to come up with ideas to display all this merch collection i'm building up so if anyone has any ideas!#i am listening#i ordered a bunch of zines and pins and charms and i wanna display them without accidentally damaging them#i'm thinking some kind of weird shrine in the living room#so everyone who visits my house has to check out the klance obsession#i just think that'll be funny#also i wfh in my living room so i'd get to see it all the time there#OH okay and finally#i got so much writing done this month#like i did fail a bunch of my fandom goals for the month but it's still an impressive amount of words added to my WIPs#and that's a win i'm gonna celebrate#if i can keep this up i'll have a huge chapter fic finished this year and ready to post in early 2025#and and and i got ANOTHER raise so#might even be able to splurge on some nice art for some of the chapters
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Large potential of never putting myself out there again
#i forgot how vulnerable you feel when you tell someone you like them#which would be fine! and id ve okay with that#if it also didnt include prolonged space between me saying it and getting....any kind of answer#like we are going on five days of no idea whats going on and holy beep captain. gal is in painnnn#but also#like ...they told me they dont like conflict and are a runner and at some point i just gotta put it down and walk away#because it feels like ive opened up my ribs and my heart is just....on display to be stabbed#so um#my bad#i guess
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