#John is definitely homophobic

[ineffablecabbage]

#the entirety of the atom sized kovter nation does a backflip

The bisexual John Truman Carter III nation as a whole is also atom sized, and it should be bigger.

John Truman Carter III Text Posts, Part II, Also featuring some of his favorite people (and one of his least favorite).

[faeyells]

Hey so… fuck you jkr

Fuck you for making everyone in your book cis, straight, white, able bodied, English speaking and from England (and if they weren’t they were some kind of stereotype)

This is my personal middle finger to you.

Remus, welsh, trans ftm, gay, disabled, uses a cane, would definitely side with Luigi, definitely only married Tonks cause they both needed someone to support them, fuck you

Sirius, French, definitely got some gender fuckery going on, bi, beats the shit out of nazis/homophobes/transphobes, love of my life, fuck you

Peter, Australian, he doesn’t fucking know or care, he just likes people (sometimes), definitely joins Sirius in his violent conquests, fuck you

James, south Asian, pan, poly, bro just loves fucking everyone, he is incapable of hate (most of the time), would literally only hate you and Voldemort, fuck you

Lily, Scottish, bi, poly, angry as fuck, will whip ur ass for talking badly about any of her friends, she would eviscerate you online, twitter is her playground and she will make you her bitch, fuck you

Marlene, Aussie, lesbian, defo some gender fuckery too, one day she’s all girly pop, next she’s in knee length cargos, crew socks, a wifebeater and uggs, about to whack you over the head with her surfboard, fuck you

Mary, Swahili, bi, trans mtf, my goddess, is just genuinely, kinder, funnier and a better writer than you, omg I just decided Mary keeps these like rlly long diaries just full of stories she’s written, hol up while I write that down, fuck you

Pandora, god knows, she’s just turned up one day, pan, trans mtf (oh I’m not even done yet), speaks in tongues fluently, would defo shit talk you to Sybil, fuck you

Sybill, Czech, bi, ace, trans (she/they) (my knowledge only extends so far on the terms front) would calmly and incredibly gorely tell you how you are going to die, and then watch Barty carry it out, smiling, fuck you

Dorcas, where do we headcanon Dorcas is from? I think she grew up in London but that might just be because I need a token “grew up here” character, would beat you, don’t fight me, fight her, fuck you

Regulus, French, bi, poly, trans ftm, he is babygirl (this is a non gendered term to me) yeah sure he’s fucked up and makes mistakes and shit, he’s remorseful, he makes up for it, but still, he’s babygirl, because if he saw you, Hed spit on your shoes and tell you to turn to love, fuck you

Evan, German, he swears Dora just showed up one day, gay, bored, loml, I cried over him two days ago, he would also beat you up, or maybe just watch Barty do it, fuck you

Barty, English (wow look at that), trans ftm, gay, fucking crazy, I love him, would troll you on twitter, would call you John Rowling and ask how much you like it BITCHHH, fuck you

Is that everyone? It doesn’t feel like everyone. I am missing someone.

OHHHH LOVES OF MY LIFE WAIT

Bellatrix, French, lesbian, crazy bitch, I love her, defo dates Rita, would be a total misandrist except for when guys are useful to her, clung only Molly cause he reminded her of the people she loved (Cissy, Rita, Andy) and would hate you :), loves Peggy by ceechyna, fuck you

Narcissa, french, lesbian, swordfights, reads Sappho, is the fucking best, Queen of lavender marriages, would give you a mildly disgusted look and walk away, we are rather displeased with you

Andromeda, French, straight (whattt???), defo tops tho, don’t know much about her but I’d like to, give me fic recommendations, she seems fucking badass, she would kill you for her little gender fluid baby, fuck you

Rita, English, lesbian (it’s getting funny at this point), trans mtf (I’m shitting myself laughing with all my headcanons written out like this), dyslexic, fight me, that quick quotes quill was there for one reason and one reason only, so she could diss you with the spelling immaculate, fuck you

Alice, German, bi, genuinely a kind person, would get incredibly angry at you if you hurt anyone she likes feeling though, wouldn’t hurt you or anything, just go best red and start crying (tears of anger) while saying mean things about you, then cissy would come over, and then she’d punch you, only if cissy said to though, fuck you

Ted, English (Yorkshire, I just know it), cis het, he does bottom though, fight me, seems genuinely kind, we love to see it, just a nice guy, fuck yeah, still fuck you though

Behold them in all their glory, no particular order or reasons. Just vibes

If I forgot anyone, pls tell me, :))) I don’t want to tag this, it’s gonna be everywhere.

I reached 30 tags so quickly,

Damn

[colorlessjay]

Oh my Jack, I’m obsessed with your BTTF AU.

I know it might not quite fit into your AU but I’ve been giggling to myself about the potential hilarious misunderstandings. My fav being s6 Dean attempts to put together all the little clues Cas has dropped about his husband but like comically wrong (plugged-all-the-numbers-into-the-right-formula-and-somehow-got-the-wrong-answer wrong)

Dean in the guest bedroom with sticky notes and red string: ok so he wears flannels and he has an Impala that looks suspiciously like baby and cas mentioned he had hair longer than mine and that he was a hunter and Sam and I knew him and they were friends for a while before anything romantic happened, and I’m clearly not hanging out with cas as much …

Dean (having a panic attack): son of a bitch I know who cas is married to!

Dean (mopey and despondent and slightly horrified the next day and definitely not with puffy eyes): Cas, I, I have to know, your husband, it’s not *gulp*

Cas (visibly worried he’s given too much away and s6 dean is still so repressed that the bi realization is throwing him into despair)

Dean whispering (trying not to vomit): Sam?

Cas (too stunned to hold back his reaction): *hysterical laughter* oh, no, dean! I’m not married to sam.

Dean (nearly passing out from relief): thank god!

Cas (under his breath): this is why my dean asked me to love him anyways when his past self asked an incredibly stupid question

Honestly I fucking love that so much, I think I have a way to shoe horn that into the AU

kinda like this:

It's been two days

It's been two days stuck in the future, and Dean feels frustration bubbling up in him as his brain tries to puzzle piece everything together

It doesn't help that Cas won't tell him shit

Best friend my ass!

Okay, maybe he's being a bit of an asshole saying that. Cas- This Cas has been nothing but a great host. He always has food in the fridge, he has extra clothes he lets Dean borrow, he doesn't get all up in Dean's personal space like his Castiel does

But at the same time, Cas keeps giving him these looks, like he knows something Dean doesn't

which sure, yeah, he knows a whole hell of a lotta things. It's the future. But Cas us smug about it. At least it feels like he's smug about it. It doesn't help that Cas is out of his holy tax accountant get up and dresses like a regular John. Least his taste in band shirts has improved thanks to his husband

Husband

yeah, that still causes a record scratch in Dean's brain every time he thinks about it

And he's got no problems with it! Love is love and all that. Who Cas wants to take home and put a ring on is his own business. It's not like Cas is a guy, he's an angel. A beam of holy light or whatever. So technically, he's not gay (Not that Dean would have a problem with that!). But it does make his husband some kind of monsterfucker

which is also totally fine. Cas is a catch. Good for both of them

So why doesn't Cas say who his husband is?

Is he scared Dean would judge him? Well fuck him for that! Dean's not a homophobe! And Cas is his best friend! He'd be supportive of him and his monsterfucker husband! Rainbow streamers with Cthulhu and all!

Unless Cas is more worried about Dean's reaction to who he's married to...

which is dumb. From what little Cas told him about Mr. Mystery (Cas refuses to tell him his last name), he wears a shit ton of plaid flannels, he cooks a lot with Cas, likes to read (a guess he got from the 'shared library' Cas showed him), is pretty handy around the house, has long stupid hair and loves his dog Miracle...

Holy shit

Dean was on his feet before he even knew what he was doing. He practically kicks down the guest room door and runs around the house looking for that damn Angel/half angel/not angel

He finds Cas in the backyard with Miracle, playing fetch on the wide stretch of land he owns

Cas looks all too comfortable in his loose, light washed jeans and Metallica shirt, his hair wind swept, probably from running around with Miracle while Dean took a nap.

Cas spots Dean approaching and waves at him with a smile, only to drop both as he sees Dean's determined march

Dean can't blame him. He has no idea what he looks like right not but he knows what he feels

like he's gonna explode

"Dean-" Cas starts but never gets to finish as Dean grabs the future version of his best friend by his shoulders and holds him still, grounding himself as he speaks

"Did you marry Sam?"

The question hung in the nice summer air for around two, three beats. Miracle even pausing where she sat with a stick in her mouth, her little head tilted to the side

Cas' usual stoic face breaks into surprise and Dean holds his breath

Only for Cas, Angel of the Lord, to burst out into an explosive laughter that rocks Dean's entire being

Suddenly Dean has no idea how to react, because Cas is... he's got the biggest, gummiest, most hysterical laugh he's ever seen. It completely transforms his face that Dean is questioning if he's still taking nap, and this was all just some weird dream where he thinks Cas is almost...

cute

Get it together, Winchester!

By the time Dean shakes away his shock, Cas is already on the ground, on his back, clutching his sides as he laughs into the sky like Dean just told the joke of the century

"Hey!" Dean snaps, his face feeling warm for reasons he doesn't have time to think about. "Answer the damn question!"

"No! Hahaha!" Cas says in between laughs, Miracle coming to his side to paw and bark at her owner

"Why the fuck not???"

"No I mean-" Cas takes a deep breath and wheezes, coughing into his fist as he tries to get himself together

Dean grumbles impatiently, popping a squat just to poke at Cas' arm to get him to answer

Eventually Cas' laughter does die down and Dean finds himself staring at just the biggest, smuggest grin he's ever seen on Cas

"I mean no, I did not marry Sam. And I believe he his reaction to you saying that would be much funnier than you asking me" Cas, for the love of God, giggles.

And it shouldn't be cute. Cas is an old man and he's giggling and Dean shouldn't feel... whatever the fuck it is he's feeling right now that's not frustration

But oddly enough he's not frustrated at all

he's relived

Is it because Sam's not gay or because Cas didn't go barking up his brother?

Why does that matter? It shouldn't. Stop thinking about it

"Dean" Cas starts, his laughing having died off and his smile softer as he stares up at Dean "Why do you ask?"

There's... there's a tone to Cas' question that Dean doesn't like. So, he does the one thing he's good at

He pushes himself up and shakes back into himself

"Well you weren't telling me jack, so I thought I'd throw in wild guesses and hope I predict something" A cool lie slip out but even he can tell Cas doesn't buy it

Damn it. Those eyes always seemed to see through him

Cas doesn't call him on his bullshit, but he knows. Dean knows he knows and it bothers him further

"Yes well. Perhaps if you keep guessing, the truth will come out eventually"

"yeah... eventually"

------------

Anyways. Drabble done. Doot doot

[niresenrab]

Modern Warfare sexuality headcannons

Price

Gay

There is not a heterosexual bone in that man's body. Like, he was deep in the closet for most of his life. Definitely had more than just the beard on his face. But you cannot convince me that he is genuinely attracted to any women.

Gaz

Bisexual

Honestly, that man is a boy kisser. I'm just saying bisexual because wishful thinking.

Soap

Bi and Trans-masc

I know at least three trans men that look like him. This man is fruity and I love him.

Ghost

Homormantic and Asexual

He's definitely on the asexual spectrum, but he is only romantically attracted to men named John (either Price or Mactavish).

Valeria

Bisexual

As much as I want her to be a lesbian, you cannot tell me her and Alejandro did not use to fuck. All of their interactions gives me messy break up vibes.

Milena

Homophobic

This woman murdered her billionaire husband and then proceeded to be a sugar mama to the biggest man whore I've ever met. She's definitely giving "I can fix him".

Laswell

Lesbian

I feel like my reasoning for this is obvious. She is happily married to her loving wife.

Farah

Bisexual

Honestly, just like Valeria, I want her to be a lesbian, but Alex exists. And there is so much chemistry between her and Alex that I cannot, with a clear conscious, say that she is not attracted to men, at least a little bit. Although, I feel like she was only attracted to women her entire life and Alex just happened to be an exception.

Makarov

Bisexual

He definitely has a male preference, but is willing to be with women. Either way, this man is a whore and a bottom.

Nikolai

Pansexual

He has definitely been around the block. If he has less than a body count of 100, I'd be surprised. Men, women, non-binary people. He's done it all in every position. He lives by the motto that he'll try anything once.

Also, not on the chart, I totally see Nikolai being trans masc. The baggy shirts are a big thing for me. Lots of layering in the chest region. But also, I like to think that the reason he is only known by an alias is because he destroyed all of his records with his dead name on it.

Roach

Transfem and aroace

I saw someone with a transfem roach headcanon. I don't remember who they are, but if you know tell me and I will credit them. Anyways, I really like it.

Also, this mother fucker gets no ass and likes it that way. She doesn't find attraction in anyone, and much prefers platonic connections.

Alex

Farah :)

This guy embodies the wife-guy trope. He loves his strong Commander wife. Can't even imagine showing attraction towards anyone else, man or woman.

Rudy

Gay

I feel like this is very self explanatory

Alejandro

Bisexual

He definitely prefers men, but has had a couple relationships with women. He seems like he would be a good boyfriend.

König

Unfuckable

Did y'all know that incels had a flag? Anyways, this man should not be within 50 ft of anyone. No bitches.

Graves

🦅 🦅MY PRONOUNS ARE USA 🦅🦅

He seems like the kind of guy that would find those videos of people making fun of pronouns hilarious. Like, he certainly said that his pronouns were USA at least once. With that said, shadow company does provide gender affirming health care to its employees. He's just a little stupid.

Also, bi.

[crownics]

McLennon won’t be revealed overnight, nor will he be exposed in an explosive way as everyone wants and expects. For over 50 years, they have been weaving wrong and false narratives. These narratives are already ingrained in the minds of older fans and intrinsically plastered in the history of the Beatles. The change of parameters that we want regarding Lennon/McCartney won’t be abrupt or happen magically. People don’t accept when something is imposed on them, even more so when they have very strong beliefs and refuse to give up what they have always believed. The view that John and Paul were lovers and had an affair is relatively recent and only part of a new generation of fans. It’s still a niche “theory” that few people know about. Not everyone has contact with it. Only the youngest fans are aware of it. And we are a minority. If this “theory” is exposed without any filter and spilled all at once, the old audience is likely to reject it and show aversion to it (as always happens when we ourselves present this narrative to other Beatlemaniacs). Unfortunately, some people will not deal well with the idea that John and Paul were lovers. Human beings tend to be frightened by the unknown and to create resistance to the new. We are talking about past generations and a cultural heritage. Everyone already has, in their heads, a preconceived concept that John and Paul were just friends and brothers. Precisely for this reason, the idea that they were in love needs to be implemented with caution, persuasion and subtlety. It needs to be gradual so that it can first be processed, and then finally accepted. Profound changes are prolonged and take time. You have to learn to dribble and gradually convince. All this movement has been happening since Get Back and the release of Now and Then and, if we stop to think about it, none of the information is being released all at once. They are taking it slow — it’s no wonder we’ve been stuck on this turning point for almost five years.

Ian Leslie can turn things around and get other historians, biographers, and fans to follow the same path. He won’t provide all the answers to the questions we have. He won’t make any big announcements. We won’t find out (at least for now) what really happened in Paris or India. Unfortunately, an LGBTQ+ woman or man wouldn’t be taken seriously, because the Beatles fandom is extremely sexist, misogynistic, and homophobic. The fact that the first person to come up with this “theory” was a straight, white man gives us a certain advantage and, like it or not, caused an extremely strong initial impact. It’s fair? Definitely not. However, it gives us support and we can take advantage of it. This book is for a audience that doesn’t know half of what will be written there like we do. It’s not exactly for us, because theoretically we already know everything about John and Paul’s relationship/history. It’s being released with the objective of introducing McLennon to the rest of the world. The point it’s Ian is bringing a new emotional perspective to John and Paul — a dependent, passionate, romantic view that many deny or refuse to accept — not that he will reveal secrets that have been kept hidden for decades. I’m not saying that we need to idolize him or put him on a pedestal, because we absolutely don’t. His character and intentions are being questioned, and it’s a valid question. But I do think that we need to take a broader, more general view of what is going on. Try calm down.

[croik]

Am I an insane person or does Malevolent kind of have like. A thing with queer coded villains. Not in a positive or reclamatory way either; it genuinely reminds me of like, old Disney movies and 2000s anime where all the most evil and inhuman male characters would also be written as campy and effeminate. And it seems like Harlan has no idea that he's doing it which is... interesting...

Like. Kayne is the most obvious example ofc. He's flamboyant and flirty and gives John and Arthur pet names. And at first I really liked it but the more it became clear that Kayne was a major antagonist and not just a mysterious neutral actor the more it started to put a bad taste in my mouth. It honestly still could have been okay if Harlan had maybe leaned more into the idea of Kayne and Arthur being parallels/foils but that ended up not really being a thing at all. Atp in the podcast I just get this really strange vibe where Kayne is simultaneously an incredibly violent, deceptive and predatory individual, and he's being written as basically canonically attracted to Arthur and it just. Seems like those two things are kind of connected. Again maybe I'm seeing things that aren't there but it seems like there are some "predatory creepy gay without boundaries" stereotypes being expressed here.

Similar issue with the Butcher. He actually has the closest to any sort of textual queerness of any Malevolent character, since he "falls in love" with his victims. Ummmm I kind of thought we had progressed past the "gay/queer serial killer who has an erotic fixation on the people he murders" trope. Apparently not. Again Harlan almost does something interesting/subversive by making our Perfect Protagonist have a weird connection/companionship with the Butcher, but in the end it seems like everyone agrees that they didn't actually have that much in common, obviously Arthur is unequivocally morally better than him, and then the Butcher gets his head exploded.

It's been longer since I listened to seasons 1-3 but Larson definitely had some similar queer-coding going on with him, as well as some other minor villains (Kellin comes to mind). It just seems like a pattern of Arthur being contrasted with characters who are not just morally corrupt but also written as (subtextually sexually) predatory or creepy, especially towards Arthur. And then Arthur is disgusted by their unnatural desires and heroically defeats or evades them. I could be making something out of nothing but it just feels... icky.

You are absolutely not an insane person of any caliber, this is something fandom has murmured about for a long time! It is definitely a thing in the show that just about any character that encounters Arthur becomes immediately obsessed with him. When it's an ally, like Noel, Oscar, even Daniel and Alia, they are almost immediately convinced of his goodness and go to great lengths not just to help him, but to reassure him that he's A Good Man (tm). But when it's the villains? It's this invasive flirtatious thing, where they're threatening not just to kill him but to lock him up in their basement or something, intimate tortures and such. (Larson maybe less so - he seems more like Southern Gentleman approach but much less handsy than Kayne and Collins). And then there's Antoine, whooo boy. If Antoine really is meant to be gay, and thus was also gay in Arthur's prime timeline when he was a Supervillain? Yeesh I don't want to think of the connotations from CoC1.

I don't believe it's intentionally homophobic, necessarily. I think these villains all represent pretty common horror tropes from over the decades, and Malevolent just co-ops them without thinking that deeply about it. In the same way that the entrance to the Witch's home is a smelly vagina wall: vagina walls have been gross in horror movies and games forever! It's here because it's a thing that all people find gross, right?? I don't think it's any different to him than shoving Arthur full of maggots, or the guy in Deviser having his fingernails torn off. These are default things people are scared of you can plop into almost any horror plot.

But in 2025 it's not wrong to want a writer to actually think about the greater context of the "things everyone thinks is scary" they put into their work, like straight men being threatened with sexual violence, or old women living in filth. Yes horror has been here hundreds of times before. But does it need to be here again? When the sexual violence is the only overt queerness on display and half of all women on the show are old and live in filth?

And of course, the fandom is doing really deranged and kinky shit with these villains, which I 100000000% support. But I don't think he fully grasps the difference between "fans making things legit queer for their own amusement and wish fulfillment" and "the creator playing at making things queer because it's creepy."

Thanks for the ask anon <3 It's very interesting stuff to talk about, especially as a queer person who sometimes writes horror.

[traincat]

Wait, what IS Moleman’s problem slash obsession with Johnny???

Honestly I wish I knew. I feel like it's one of those things that comes up enough that there's a definite pattern here, but one that Fantastic Four doesn't really explore outside of the immediate instances in which it happens. The exception being Unstable Molecules, which reframes Johnny and the Mole Man as two teenage friends, both heckled with homophobic comments by the popular boys, with the Mole Man yearning to retain a stagnant situation where Johnny is all his in face of Johnny's burgeoning sexuality and yearning to escape their small town.

Unstable Molecules is not 616 canon, for the record. It's an extremely good, extremely meta comic about the fictional "real people" who inspired the Fantastic Four.

For an actual 616 example, let's look at one of the most Comics comics of all time: Fantastic Four #296.

This is an extreme transitional period in the Fantastic Four. John Byrne just left the book at a critical moment right before the 300th issue. Sue and Johnny are in their matching hairstyles era. Johnny's just proposed to "Alicia," who will be retconned as Lyja in like 60 issues. And Ben is handling it SUPER normally by joining the Mole Man's underground kingdom of freaks.

Fashion icon. I'm obsessed with the little moloid butler.

The Mole Man decides that, since Johnny is the cause of Ben's suffering, he should get revenge on Johnny, a thing that will definitely make Ben feel better.

Also Alilyja is here in another stunning example of how they pulled the "Alicia was a Skrull all along" retcon off perfectly by not writing Alicia remotely in character for about a hundred issues. Go girl give us nothing.

So anyway the Mole Man kidnaps Johnny and disfigures him and this is totally about Ben and not at all about the Mole Man and Johnny's beauty. Fascinating stuff going on here viz a viz goodness = physical beauty in superhero comics, but eh. I'm just here for the Johnny whump.

This of course snaps Ben out of his "Johnny's marrying my girl (who I dumped) (and was about to dump again)" funk and straight back into "I love Johnny" territory. Classic. I'm sure he'll be normal about the Alicia stuff now.

No. See the cover of the very next issue:

Buddy, again, you dumped her.

Anyway, Ben stays behind to use one of the Mole Man's machines to restore Johnny's beautiful face.

What's the Mole Man doing while his kingdom is collapsing? Oh, nothing. Normal stuff. Partying in his secret room filled with holographic beautiful men and women. Like I said. Normal. No reason to connect that with wanting to punish Johnny by stripping away his beauty at all.

Another example, and one I find less interesting, but I may as well include it.

Fantastic Four: 1, 2, 3, 4 -- YMMV with this one in general. Gorgeous art. The writing, well. It's one of those books that I find tangentially interesting but don't really incorporate into my personal characterization because it's not great at it. Readers be warned about an extremely 2002 comment on autism with regards to Reed. In it, the Mole Man captures Alicia (the real one this time) and Johnny and tries to get Alicia to maim Johnny with a pair of scissors.

Again, it's just interesting thematically to think about this, especially when Unstable Molecules reframed it the way it did.

[lokilokilolki]

The tragic homosexual love trope: a cross-examination

I personally don't think Hannibal is the same kind of emotionally stunted because to be fair (spoiler) he does say exactly what he means every time via cleverly and symbolically splayed corpses.

And John I feel, definitely was abandoned by Sherlock after Reichenbein for three years, but they did get back together after in a satisfying conclusion (raising a child together omg besties) so like hopefully all the gays just adopt in the next seasons

BBC Merlin (I'm just realizing) has so many parallels too fml might update

Part two of ~that one show with a lot of tragic gay subtext that isn't really subtext but the studio is homophobic (not you Neil and Brian, love u guys <3) so we just say it's subtext~: A Cross-Reference

Sherlock and Will def have the most in common and are just on opposite ends of the moral spectrum which is basically the only thing keeping Sherlock away from being the scariest serial killer ever.

BONUS: SHERLOCK AND HANNIBAL: both keep decapitated heads in their fridges ayoooo

Everyone: "My boyfriend would kill/severely maim for me"

I also feel like Arthur from BBC Merlin would also fit really well here. His character especially identifies with Aziriphale:

I love him, but the belief system that was drilled into my head all my life prevents me from fully accepting him as he is

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.1

I thank my lucky stars every night that Yoko eventually got sick of playing secret-keeper.

Paul: I didn't leave the Beatles. The Beatles have left the Beatles . . . John said he wanted a divorce. Alright, so do I. See how they say “Beatles” and they mean each other sometimes?

Derek Taylor on John's position on the break-up: if Paul were to approach him and say “let's do it together again” he probably would; with no more words, he would probably do it. Which is an insane claim to make to a world full of people grieving the greatest band to ever exist unless you are very very sure of that probability. But if it's true that that's all it would have taken, and Paul didn't do it? That hurts my head a little. Do we think he was just hurt too bad to want it back? Do we think he didn't know he had that kind of power? Do we think he was glad to be free of the group?

Ugh my heart can't take it. I'd cry too, John, watching that. I mean look at how they are looking at each other. Look at everything they've lost in a year. I'd bawl like a baby too.

Paul sends John a long, thorough letter, begging for them to legally end their partnership outside of a court. John's run out of cards at this point, but he still doesn't want to lose Paul, so he's just going to play dumb.

This is how bad he doesn't want to lose him, actually: he goes along with Klein in tricking Paul this time. Calls him up and asks him to come to the studio for a jam session, because it'll hurt his case in court. But for multiple reasons – the Eastmans were knowledgeable lawyers, and Paul might not have even wanted to be in a room with John at the time anyway – Paul doesn't come. Which John would've been hurt and angry over, no matter his motives.

"They tell you to stop crying at about age twelve. Be a man. What the hell's that?" I'm so proud of John for his (albeit long and backsliding) journey out of his toxic masculinity and violence. Something I honestly don't see him achieving without Yoko.

And from that quote it transitions to Paul in Scotland, looking like the embodiment of depression, as the opening of “Isolation” plays. It's perfect.

“And don't try to come over here. Or you might get in some trouble.” The way he just froze when he saw them filming him and then the next thing we see is him threatening them? Get ‘em, babe!

John sounds so giddy about this one-upping competition with Paul. I'll scare him and then he'll scare me!

The whole Lennon Remembers era is such a terrible case of diarrhea of the mouth in general, but the amount of homophobic language is quite striking compared to how John talked before and after.

John, talking about George in Rolling Stone: "he was working with two fucking brilliant songwriters and he learned a lot from us." People read that quote and just parrot it like they do with everything John said in this period and act like George had nothing to be angry over. He had every right to be much angrier and hold a much bigger grudge than he did.

And about George's new record, which was phenomenal and brilliant, John is transparently jealous and so cruel. If he'd said that about me and then asked me to play on his new record I'd tell him to go to hell. Why did George do it?

See and everyone who knows John knows how much he loved Brian and to hear him speaking so crassly and cruelly about Brian must've been a sure indication to them to just take the entire interview through that lense of “oh he's just saying shit”. But that's only the people who knew him. Everyone else for the rest of time took this shit as constitutional. And it pisses me off. It should be locked away in a vault somewhere and no one is allowed to listen to it until they've passed some kind of Beatles and emotional intelligence tests.

This crushes my soul. How warped must his definition of love have been by that point that he genuinely believed Phil Spector and Allen Klein loved him more than Paul and George did? It's bonkers.

John in 1967: all you need is love! John in 1971: the point of life is to manipulate people. . . . What the hell happened to you, buddy?

I go back and forth as to who's the smarter PR person: John or Yoko? Because maybe she's right. Maybe they shouldn't divulge that they're master manipulators. But is this one of those times when it's good to be all “look how honest we are about this! We're not hiding anything! We're saying bad things about ourselves too! So you should believe us about everything else!”

Really this documentarian should be hired to make all the music videos for all the Beatles and solo songs. This one for “Too Many People” is perfect. Paul walking into court with a full beard and a confident stride, John and Yoko in bed, Paul horse riding overlayed on Linda's gorgeous face like she's some goddess, designing his fate. All of it is just pure brilliance.

I'm forever laughing at just the title of the song, too. Because to John and Yoko it was so important that they were Weird and Off-putting. Different. Revolutionary. And to say “no. You're not special. There's actually an excess of people like you.” Is so funny to me.

“When she wants an A side, that's when we start fighting.” Oh gosh. Remember how I said he backslides a lot in his feminism journey? Yeah…

Insanity quote Hall of Fame. Yeah, I know he meant to say it's weird to be best friends with a woman. But it sounds like he's saying it's weird to fuck a woman. Which maybe he subconsciously means both idk.

Paul: we need to legally dissolve the partnership because it's the only way we're attached anymore. Ouch. Okay it's true. It's deserved. But that must've stung for the guy who was terrified of losing people. Must've sent him into fight or flight.

I think the point of this framing is to say that if they'd had facetime back then, instead of just crackly phone lines, HDYS would not have been written. Not with those puppy eyes staring him down like that.

Interviewer: the song wasn't even funny though. John: well I think it's hilarious. Interviewer: hmm. Lol I love hearing interviewers talk to John about his lyrics like he's a real guy doing a real job, though. Imagine a music critic now saying John Lennon wasn't clever in his lyrics. You can't, yeah. Me either.

What a slap in the face to Cynthia. Guess she wasn't Cool Girl enough. Should've gone girled him. That would be an excellent fic. Cyn and Jane gone girl their idiot bfs and John and Paul realize they're in love on death row. But anyway, yeah. If Paul would've just pet John's head . . .

Another absolutely bonkers thing to say. That's something the Rockstar’s ex wife says in a documentary ten years after he's dead, not something a songwriting partner says, completely unprompted, in an exiting the band interview.

And then he goes off on what I see as a self-soothing diatribe on Paul the family man. You can see the hoops he jumped through to get himself there. What did Paul want that I couldn't give him? A family. And is that justified? Absolutely not, only pussies and conservatives want families.

Allan Klein: were you and Paul ever really close, then? John: no. John: not that I didn't love him. I did. It's just that every time I let my guard down, he hurt me. Holy shit. At this point, after getting hit in the face with so much of John's Paul-made pain with nothing from the other side but pictures of the happy McCartney family, I'm genuinely feeling quite angry at Paul. Me. An extremely biased Paul girl who knows it's far more complicated and multi-dimensional than this. No wonder the uninformed public fucking hated his guts.

And as they're showing this quote, “I didn't want to hurt you,” plays mournfully in the background. They really are so twisted up in each other there's no separating individual identities.

Okay so he's a psychopath. So what? He's the sexiest man that ever was or ever will be. He's allowed to be a horrible person. No, but really. He's Get Back Paul but healthier. He's done with his depression drinking and he's been spending a lot of time proving he's still useful enough to exist by building fences and shearing sheep.

And this is how Paul talks about George to interviews. John said Klein made ATMP a success but Paul disagrees. "George recorded it all, wrote it all, did it all, wasn't anything to do with [Klein]. It was George's victory, wasn't it?" Compare that to how John does it and tell me again why the hell George is Team John?

What is Paul's obsession with daddies? Actually I know exactly what the obsession with daddies comes from, but we won't get into that here. I do find it interesting that in ‘69 he's saying “we do need a sort of central daddy figure.” And in ‘71 he's deriding John needing one and won't let John's daddy of choice touch him with a hundred foot pole.

I tend to think Paul chafes against authority in general, but that's actually not right. He never had a problem with George Martin. I think it's just abusive authority or authority he doesn't trust yet.

[avonne-writes]

I’d love your thoughts on gales relationship w his father in any of ur modern AUs + how John reacts to/fits into it!!

Thank you so much ❤️ Great question! I will describe their relationship in the high school AU, because the others are not yet defined in my head.

In the HS AU:

Gale's dad is often drunk or at a bar in the evening and gets home in the middle of the night

If he’s drunk at home, he keeps Gale up, if he gets home at night, he wakes him up by being too loud

So Gale has sleep problems. Because of this, he sleeps at Bucky’s as often as possible, which usually means every weekend and sometimes during the week too

When Gale’s dad has a bad night gambling, he gets verbally aggressive, berates Gale and his mom, blames them for bad luck etc. Bucky told Gale to call him even during the night if this happens. Gale never does, but the thought that he could feels really comforting to him.

Gale's dad isn’t overtly homophobic and he doesn’t threaten Gale for being gay. But all Gale's life, he has been saying stuff about what a real man should look like and how he should behave. The older Gale gets, the more he disagrees with the man’s ideas. This is why he grows out his hair.

A few times, Gale’s dad hit him when drunk. Bucky helped hide the bruises with his mom's make-up.

Gale asks his mom to get a divorce multiple times, but she's always torn about it and if she tells Gale's dad she's going through with it, the man sobers up for a while and acts all nice and decent to keep them.

When he starts drinking again after a nice period, Gale goes to Bucky and just lies in complete, silent defeat in his embrace.

He tells Bucky he’s moving out as soon as possible and will never go back.

None of their friends know about all this, they just know he fights with his parents and spends a lot of time hanging out at Bucky’s place.

He goes to the school psychologist every week, and Bucky always waits for him, often kicking a soccer ball around in the schoolyard. If Gale had a session that shook him / left him drained, he sits on a bench and Bucky shows him tricks with the ball and plays around until Gale smiles again.

Gale's parents almost never attend school events / swim meets / competitions.

Gale's mom is so caught up in her own struggles that she uses him as a crutch too in dealing with his dad. Gale is used to taking this responsibility on his shoulders but as he gets older, and especially after meeting Bucky's mom, he realizes that this is not how it should be and he grows resentful. It’s perhaps unfair but he resents her more than his dad and then feels guilty for it.

Gale loves Bucky's mom and she loves him too. One day, when he has a crisis, she tells her that she'll always be there for him, even if he and Bucky break up.

Bucky's mom is a single parent and is away a lot due to work (which feeds into one of Bucky's problems, but that's a different story). But she's laidback about a lot of things and doesn’t try to hold Bucky back from exploring, so it's not really an issue when they start having sex. There’s none of that bullshit "open door policy".

Gale categorically refuses to take Bucky home with him. They've been dating for like two years or something already when he lets Bucky enter the house with him for the first time.

By the time this happens, Bucky is taller than Gale's dad. He’s gangly but he’s not intimidated by the man. Him being all protective actually makes Gale feel a mix of affection and arousal.

There’s definitely an altercation between Bucky and Gale's dad at one point, possibly close to graduation, but Bucky disengages when he realizes that it makes Gale upset.

Bucky helps Gale learn how to relax and enjoy things. Gale reassures Bucky that Gale is someone he can always count on and who won't abandon him.

[sammygender]

accidentally secret gay ally john winchester is still my funniest invention. johns actively thinking If Sam’s gay i’ll still love him why would i care i have bigger things to worry about with him than that. like him reading books. deans actively thinking Fuck fuck shit sam’s probably gay because he reads books and dad’s definitely homophobic because he hates sam reading books. sam doesn’t know gay people exist. he just wants to read his fucking books

[shoegazingmonad]

Is Tavvy Gay?

Recently I reread Candy Chapter 23 - Tavvy's first talking appearance - and I've noticed there's a lot more homophobia than I remembered it having, and more allusions to Tavvy's sexuality than I thought there'd be. Of course heteronormativity is central to Candy's themes and therefore homophobia is too, it's just a little more exaggerated here than the rest of the epilogues.

And because of how important repression is to Tavvy's character and how common gay repression is in Homestuck I thought it might be worth it go back and check for any slither of information that'd suggest he isn't straight, and sure enough, there's definitely enough to make it worth talking about.

The chapter starts with all of the wedded couples entering Jane's manor, Man and Woman, with the only gay couple in Candy notably absent. When Harry starts opening his presents Tavvy is distant from the rest of them.

John then asks if he can go see the trophy room to look at memorabilia of Rumble in da Pumpkin Patch, the gayest show Jake's ever been on.

This request is immediately met with disgust, and Dave suggests 'sweaty' as the most appropriate descriptor of it, to which Jade agrees. Note that 'sweaty' here is used as a substitute to a direct insult of the show's homoerotic nature, and how sweaty we know Tavvy to be.

Faygo can be used as a substitute for the f slur sometimes, and in a past conversation between Gamzee and Tavros (Nitram) he threatens to sneak up on this bottle of faygo and snap its neck, and Kanaya threatens to snap Tavvy's neck, which suggests Tavvy is the Faygo.

There's the topic of Tavvy being preyed on by Gamzee, which also frames homosexuality as predatory. Homophobia abound...

Tavvy then proceeds to make a gay joke so subtle it completely flew over my head the first few times I read this, and immediately stumbles towards his closet.

By the end of John's tantrum, he's fully in the closet. Impressive how much homophobic / gay subtext is in here. Not sure you'd usually do that with a straight character, especially in a character's first appearance as usually in those you try to assert several core themes or imply some stuff that'll come up in the future.

Though there's the question of how Vrissy fits into this and whether he has an Oedipus complex as he's dating a blue girl who bosses him around (just like his mom) there would need to be the implied threat of castration from your dad and Jake seems to be in support of them (though this is unbeknownst to Tavvy) and Gamzee encourages Harry to get a prime slice of that beef vrisket so I assume he'd do the same for Tavvy. Kinda feels like a misdirection if anything.

Speaking of Vrissy.

Beautiful Freudian slip from her over here. Just incredible.

And in response to Vriska: I too once thought this sickly motherfucker over here was the sickly motherfucker. Alas....

After their argument she's staring off to the right; straight at Vriska with spade eyes, whilst Tavvy's are so conveniently shut.

A couple of scenes later they're even forced into a closet,

In which Tavvy feels he has 'never felt so close to death', and Vrissy is 'trying her best not to grapple with any cosmic truths'.

And the nail in the coffin:

Tavvy, despite his physical prowess that they state on the exact same page as that quote,

comes last. Clowns are a symbol of masculinity and the father, by the way. Great job Tavvy.

My conclusion?

Anyway, since Faygo is sticky and sweatiness is homoerotic, everytime Tavvy is called sticky or sweaty as an insult it's pretty much just thinly veiled homophobia. You're welcome everyone

[funnypages]

Conclave: The Surprise Movie Recommendation of October

So this is not at all what I would usually share on here, but if you looking for a movie to see with some of you older family, especially with the holidays coming up next few months, I definitely recommend you check out Conclave, a political thriller/mystery set during the election of a new pope, based of a 2016 novel by Robert Harris

Basic plot: Cardinal Thomas Lawrence (Ralph Fiennes) is a cardinal of the liberal faction in the Roman Catholic Church, who receives news that the current pope (unnamed but heavily modeled after current Pope Francis) has died. As Dean of the College of Cardinals, it is Lawrence's responsibility to organize and manage the papal conclave during which the cardinals of the Church will be sequestered within the Sistine Chapel and elect the new pope.

Going into the conclave the 4 main candidates for pope are:

Cardinal Goffredo Tedesco (Sergio Castellitto) - An Italian cardinal from the extremely conservative traditionalist faction of the church, who wishes to undue all reforms the Catholic Church has initiated since the 1960s; and is a racist, fundamentalist, homophobe. The closest thing to a villain the movie has

Cardinal Joshua Adeyemi (Lucian Msamati) - A Nigerian cardinal, who while a liberal on economic issues and not wanting to roll back all reforms, is a hardliner against acceptance of LGBT+ issues.

Cardinal Joseph Tremblay (John Lithgow) - A Canadian Conservative (although arguably more of a centrist), who has been machinating for months prior to the old pope's death to be elected, and will do anything to make sure it happens

Cardinal Aldo Bellini (Stanley Tucci) - An American cardinal who is a friend of Lawrence and the late pope. The candidate for the liberal/reform faction; he wants to improve relations with non-Christian religions, moderate the church on abortion and LGBT+ issues, and open to allowing women in the clergy. Although more sympathetic than the conservative candidates, we come to discover he is just as power hungry as them for the papacy.

As Lawrence tries to manage the election (while also supporting his friend as neutral as possible), he finds himself trying to investigate conspiracies, coverups, blackmail; and the appearance of a mysterious cardinal nobody has met before, but was appointed by the pope in secret prior to his death.

The movie is incredibly well acted and shot; and while quite critical of the Catholic Church at times; quite sympathetic in actual religious belief. I have seen some very pissed of reviews complaining about it being "woke" but while it is definitely on the side of the liberal faction, both Tremblay and Adeyemi get sympathetic moments. Although the "woke" accusations probably come mostly from the final twist. Won't give it away, but the movie says Queer Rights.

If you are still curious, I recommend checking out the trailer. It actually does a really good job of not spoiling anything but mixing around lines and scenes.

[borrelia]

Sonic Old Man Yaoi/Old Woman Yuri Knockout

TWO pairings with the LEAST votes will be eliminated

Intros to each pairing below

Gerald Robotnik was Eggman's grandfather, introduced in Sonic Adventure 2. He made a false deal with Black Doom to create Shadow the Hedgehog in exchange for the Chaos Emeralds, making them both Shadow's dads. They definitely banged and had some kind of toxic mess of a relationship.

Grimer Wormtongue is a nasty little assistant to Ivo Robotnik in Fleetway Sonic the Comic. He is extremely devoted to his cruel master, which is for sure a sexual thing.

Ebony the Mystic Mog and Pyjamas the Psychic are two characters from Sonic the Comic who appear briefly in a Knuckles story, then become minor recurring characters that take in Super Sonic from the streets. They appear as old friends in their introduction and are implied to live together. If these two aren't married, it's only because Mobius is homophobic.

Blockhead Bill is Mighty's dad in Sonic the Comic. He is a very confused old man who convinces his posh "business associate" Society Max to assist him in taking down his nemesis the Crimson Cobra. This involves Max eating a magic mandrake root and becoming a giant dinosaur, which Bill rides around to cause destruction. idk about you but I'd only let someone do that to me if they were my funny little lover.

Mephiles the Dark and Iblis are two halves of the sun/time god Solaris, introduced in Sonic '06. Iblis is kind of just a big fire monster I think but Mephiles orchestrates this whole plot through the course of the game to re-merge with Iblis and form Solaris. Which sounds like some pretty twisted villainous gay devotion to me.

Ixis Naugus and Ian St. John are characters from the Archie Sonic the Hedgehog comics. Naugus is some kind of evil wizard who enlists the help of Geoffrey St. John, Ian's son, with plot things. I can't decipher Archie plots sorry. When Naugus first contacts Geoffrey, he expects him to be his father Ian. From @mischeva: "why are you wanting to talk to geoffrey’s dad? hm naugus? kinda….kinda interesting." Image also provided by mischeva, ty :)

Starline and Eggman were allowed in by popular vote, mostly by Eggman's qualifying age. Dr. Starline is a character from the IDW Sonic the Hedgehog comic. He is a fanboy and devotee of Eggman, restoring Eggman's lost memories and assisting him in his Metal Virus plot. Starline eventually plots to betray Eggman, as he believes himself smarter and more genre-savvy than his idol. He is of course wrong and Eggman beats the shit out of him and kills him to death. Starline is sort of like gen z's Grimer, kind of the tumblr sexyman dark academia Grimer, in that he's younger and prettier than Grimer, but he probably still wants to fuck that old man so bad.

[futuremrscameron]

obx sexuality hcs

kiara: lesbian (homoerotic middle school friendship nearly killed her)

pope: bi

jj: gay or bi (irdgaf)

sarah: queer (despite popular beliefs cleo was her gay awakening)

cleo: pansexual (her and sarah definitely had something going on in the bahamas)

john b: token straight of the crew

rafe: no one knows but he's dating barry (surprises everyone cause he's very homophobic)

barry: gay (surprisingly NOT homophobic)

topper: straight but had a crush on rafe in middle school

kelce: either straight or gay (i really don't know he gives me either or vibes like damn nigga be bisexual)

sofia: surprisingly straight (girl magnet)

[wilson-is-a-slut]

I need to talk about son of a coma guy for a second because I don't think that some people realize that the aforementioned coma guy also did some old man yaoi type shit back in the 80s

this is the coma guy:

and this is john larroquette, aka dan fielding from the '84-'92 sitcom night court:

dan is a district attorney in manhatten, new york. he is very much the character who is obsessed with his looks, who he's seen with, how much he's worth and women; and when I say women, I mean the stereotypical big boobs, blond and ditzy.

one look at his character and he come off as a misogynist, who only sees women as objects, and while that is true for that type, it is not true for all of them. dan has a great deal of respect for the women of the court room he works with. selma, flo and roz, the three female bailiffs throughout the series, respect (and scare) dan, even though he is a pig (there's also billie and christine but that's a whole other can of worms not fit for a house blog) selma and flow are both older women who die during the shows run and roz is not his type, but even if all three of them were his type, I don't think that anything would have happened because of their respect.

and this being the late 80s early 90s, there are of course jokes about him being perceived as gay, even going so far as to being stuck in an elevator with a gay man for an entire episode (now a little side tangent about that episode, I don't necessarily think that dan is homophobic, but more so offended that someone thought he was, I just had to put that out there) of course he takes offence, he goes out of his way to sleep with women left and right, even going as far as to get out of work early to do so (a lot like house in that aspect, but we'll get to that later)

now I don't know exactly what shipping culture looked like back then (if anyone can tell me though that would be really cool) but I think it's safe to assume that nobody was hardcore shipping dan with harry t. stone, the presiding judge of the courtroom where dan worked.

now on to dan and harry,

I mean, just look at the two of them. I love dan and harry very much. dan cares a great deal for harry, even though he would never admit that. in fact, the very first episode, dan tries to get harry removed from the bench. dan and harry are very liked minded when it comes to the court; I think that's why dan "tolerates" harry as much as he does. and while harry wished dan spent his personal time on thing other than women and dan could care less about harry's hobbies, they both care and respect each other.

ok ok , now on to the comparison of dan and house.

they both have a past they wish they could have buried:

dan - his parents being country folk, dan in fact being his middle name and being from louisiana altogether

house - his dad, stacy, and in part his leg (there's definitely more to this list but you get the drift)

and one last character comparison I wanna make is that they both pay for women; that's said outright, but I honestly think that in terms of who would keep paying for longer before asking themself "what the fuck am I doing?" is dan. now, that might come as a shocker to someone whose never seen night court, but house is more self loathing than dan and I think he would realize first that what he is doing stopped being fun 100 dollars ago and oh, my leg is starting to hurt again. dan would go for broke, metaphorically and physically, until he was broke and until the two (or three or four) of them broke the bed. all dan cares about is sex and all house cares about is forgetting, they just happen to show off in the same way.

I will leave you all with me projecting that dan and harry are house and wilson respectively because I am in fact that far gone

your honor, it's the same picture

should I do harry and wilson next??