#I'll stop now thank you for coming to my ted talk

[guardian-angle22]

Colson Baker (aka Machine Gun Kelly) | December 2021

[thevoidstaredback]

If you haven't watched FMA 03, then you have exactly one week to watch it before we can no longer be friends.

If you refuse to watch FMA 03, then we can no longer be friends.

If you tell people to skip FMA 03, then we can no longer be friends.

If you have not seen Conqueror of Shambala, then you have exactly three hours to change that before we can no longer be friends.

[sans-enjoyer]

Inanimate Insanity Episode 16 Spoilers!!!!

its been like, two days since episode 16, and people are already arguing about Mephone's age. He is a child, and this didnt come out of nowhere guys, he's always BEEN a child:

^post from 2018!! 5 YEARS ago!

^Brian reposting art (amazing art btw<3) where Mephone is described as a CHILD and drawing in a childish way.

^Brian saying that Mephone is so young he doesn't even know how to SPELL.

Now; heres some stuff ive been hearing in argument against him being a child.

"Cobs is infantilizing him." I agree with this to a certain extent, he is acting like Mephone is a child who cant comprehend anything like an abusive parent. but thats where it stops. Children can ALSO be infantlized! But aside from that, Cobs even says; "I forgot how young you are!" Parents don't say that to their adult children, because it makes no sense unless Mephone is a child.

Secondly, why would Brian and Justin be doing the same thing? They say he's young!

"He has an adult voice." Robots don't hit puberty! This means nothing. Unless youre saying that the creators implied hes an adult because hes voiced by an adult, well i'll have to refer you to the images above.

"He hosts an entire show." Arguably not very well, also again, he's a robot, and also, theyre on an island! its not like you need a permit to film on a random island in god knows where. Any child can "host" a show if they have enough determination, general knowledge of how they work, and equipment, and would you know it Mephone has all three! He knows how they work because he watched them in meeple, and he can generate any equipment he needs.

"He's a robot, he doesn't have an age." True..? sort of...? But the thing is, being legally defined as a child is based off your mental capacity. Children arent as mentally/emotionally intelligent as grown adults, because they don't have the life experience nor the capacity to be. Mephone barely has ANY life experience, he grew up in Meeple, and then started the show immediately after leaving. And obviously, in Inanimate Insanity (and all object shows), robots are almost always sentient beings, unlike real life.

"He's much more mature than a child, especially one that couldn't spell." Debatable! First of all, he thinks things like 'going to jail for one day' and 'the calm down corner' are terrible punishments, like children. If you tell a child to go sit on the stairs for 5 minutes and frame it as a punishment, they will take it as serious as anything else. Secondly, he literally decided to make a random species of bat.. things? fight to the death because they ate his four month old ice cream. No mature person would do that... Thirdly, abused children ACT more mature than others because they HAVE to be. Abused children are not ALLOWED to act like children. They have to be mature for themselves because who else is going to be? Who else is going to take care of you when your parent doesn't? But that doesn't mean they arent still a child.

So now we tread into questionable territory. Is it okay to deny the idea that he is a child at all costs, just so you can ship him or sexualize him? There is really no other reason why you would deny that he is a child.

Now obviously; lets not harass anyone who has drawn ship art of him or sexualized him in the past. This stuff was not commonly known, most people thought he was an adult. But if you look deeper, he isn't.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk, if anyone reads this far (￣^￣)ゞI know I usually only post art, but this is an important topic to me as i am very hyperfixated on Mephone4 i swear i can't control it guys!!

Feel free to make any counter points, im open to discussion, but i am also very set on this opinion. Have a good day everyone!!☆

[n3ptoonz]

BEGGING you to make more sub mk men content 😭 they're always dom in all the other hc's and it's refreshing to see something that's my cup of tea lol

oh? like this? throws this post behind me like a bouquet toss earthrealm guys here

mk1 hcs: how the outworld guys react to you riding them

y'all sure do love headcanons LMFAOO

i always try my best for most of the outworld cast cause i'm truly an earthrealm girly, but i got yall. yall really challenge me 😵‍💫

Shang Tsung

This sly mf. He thought when you suggested riding, he'd be the one watching you writhe, but it's quite the opposite. Little did you know it was all an act. A fib; fairytale. He wants power, of course, but in the bedroom it's entirely different

Nothing will get him to submit fast than treating him like a common harlot. He's in desperate need of hair pulling, degradation, maybe even act like you're trying to kill him. He's into that shit! He's an aggressive man, so he should be treated as such

I'm talking fully dog this man out while you ride him. It'll drive him mad and make him crave it. Hell, slap him around and call him names and his gasps, groans, and deep whimpers will clear the air in no time! If you add small weapons to the mix or like a role play thing it's ON

He's literally the meme "don't bully me i'll cum" so do with that what you will!

Rain

Rain sexy ass...OOF. That smug "i am a demigod" attitude is punted out the window when you ride him. One single stroke of his hair and a caress of the jaw and just like that he's a slut!

Give him praises. He wouldn't handle degradation too well. On the outside he appears to have his shit together and doesn't have a care in the world about anybody else but his studies (and you), but he likes to be taken care of

If you want to be rougher or if he asks you to, really just pull his hair/give him love bites. idk it might just be me but i just wanna bite him sooo we're gonna say he likes bites! He's also super handsy but mostly when he's close

He's not very vocal but when he is i can see him as the kinda man that like...purrs, if that makes sense? If it don't i say he's a grunter and from groan city: population him

Reiko

Reiko has a hard time being submissive, but you just make it a little easier for him. You kinda have to coax him into it before every time you get intimate because he's made it clear he can do both and wants to try submitting more to the person he loves

It was your suggestion after a long time away for a mission. Poor dude was stressed da hell out! He's like Rain, a sucker for praise. Now that i'm really picturing it he'd prob be down to smother his face into your chest cause like, that's hot to him

When he's feeling particularly spicy definitely tie him down so he can't pull free no matter how much brute strength he uses. Hold his face and never break eye contact, he's all yours! If you call him any name that has the word "strong" in it he's like puddy in your hands

Prime grunt man here. He ain't whimpering unless you deny him of something, even then it goes from a coarse tone to soft

General Shao

Siiggghhhh 🙄 Shao likes the riding position the most. That's all thanks for coming to my Ted talk

LOL JUST KIDDING😹 He would appear like he's incapable of submission but like, this is YOU we're talking about. And he'd do anything for you. Literally.

A little birdy told me he loves when you grab his horns. Grab his horns. Grab them and make him look at you. This unbreakable wall of man yearns to be conquered by someone like you. Someone who dared to challenge him and never back down? By the Gods he has a breeding knk whether you can have kids or not. oh yeah, he'd beg. plead. he's gasping for air like pls just don't stop riding him LMAO he needs his mind off taking the throne for a few hours

whimpering little bitch which eventually turn into growls and grunts. takes a bow

Reptile

Syzoth is so subby I literally cannot picture him dominating a soul. Ashrah got that man on hold fr but anyway this about you

Typa dude to tear up when you ride him. You just look so damn good, and you make him feel so damn good. Dizzy eyes that he can barely keep open; I feel like he'd go brain numb from how fast he feels pleasure

I'm talking like because he's not originally human he's more sensitive. Now hear me out guys...two dicks....AHEM. DONT SHOOT THE MESSENGER!! Both his dicks are very sensitive OHHHHHHHHH Reduce him to a sobbing, stuttering, gasping, mess. He needs it, wants it, loves it. It's up to you if you'd ride him in his og form ya nasty. He'd also have a tendency to leave bite marks on you like your chest, neck, and shoulders

Mister whimper over here there's nothing else he does but whimper and cry jesus almighty somebody give this man a HUG (hug him while you fuck him dumb/busts)

Havik

Banging my head against the wall rn lemme tap in...ok we here let's go.

Another kombatant who peruses power, but also very much attracted to it. He definitely likes to be dominated. He'd be into some real kinky shit too i know it. Literally all the above he don't wanna think about SHIT

He would thoroughly enjoy being completely helpless at your disposal as you ride him. He likes degradation more than praises but if you do give him the kind of praise that inflates his already massive ego. shoot down his arrogance while also maintaining it he fucking lives for it. he likes being choked or slapped too keep that in mind

This bitch growls and that's it. bro ain't got the lips to really make different sounds LMAO?? get yo fuckin dog bitch!!!

Baraka

You might be insane but we love that haha...! Monster fucker certificate checked at the door i understand i do

Absolutely no degradation here DO NOT!! Mf might start crying or give a monologue either way, steer clear. Be nice to him!!

He likes to be held, and he likes holding his partner. If this was confident Baraka from the previous timeline I'd say he likes fast and crazy over slow and romantic but that's not the case. Be immersed and in the moment with him, he clings onto the human interactions he got stripped from him 😞

Growls but that's mostly bc he deadass don't have lips either LMFAO😭

a/n: tearing my skin off rn I DID IT GUYS I DID IT TELL ME IM GREAT😎author likes praise too.

[thedisapointmentfairy]

Ok so what I got so far is the guy we all though was gonna be bloody ben ended up most likely dead after the burning mill,(i'm like 99% we saw his corpse) and I know people have been talking about how he was named Davos in the subtitles BUT I CHECKED! both the english cc and norwegian one and none of them said shit, so i'll be living in denial untill we get more information.... thank you all for coming to my ted talk

EDIT:

ALSO if he was Davos who is a new made up character there is nothing stopping them from making him Benjicot's twin, if we dont get anymore of house blackwood this season and they havent started filming season 3, (i'm not 100% sure if they have or not i'm just assuming they havent gotten that far) so if bloddy ben has not bern cast yet i think they shoud make Davos who died his twin brother so we can still get kieran to play Bloody Ben,

Ok NOW i'm done with my ted talk (for now)

[omensandwonders]

filthy thoughts about the eepy boys

im in a whole other universe of down horrendous after FINALLY seeing the boys live (well, II and Ves (im crying)) so... this is my outlet. youre welcome and/ or im sorry

warnings: pure filth

vessel:

♤ a munch and a yapper, idc

♤ only time this man shuts up is when his head's buried between your legs and even that's loud, with the way he's groaning into your cunt

♤ eats like he will never see another woman again after this, hands grabbing everywhere he can reach - thighs, ass, stomach, waist.

♤ often uses both tongue and fingers, either fucking his fingers into you while sucking your clit or rubbing tight circles on your clit with his thumb while he's tongue fucking you

♤ mans is hung (we all know it) so he will absolutely make you cum at least three times with his fingers and tongue before giving you his dick

♤ when he does, he's so vocal, groans and whines leaving his throat completely unrestrained

♤ forgets how strong he is, often leaving your thighs, hips and waist bruised

♤ STAMINA.

♤ youre not done until hes done

♤ filthy mouth on that one i tell you

♤ now i also see vessel being more dominant and calculating, but... more on that later if yall want that (👀?)

♤ all im sayin... i think hes the most dominant of all of them... his hand + your throat =mmdjxjisjs (also *cough* spit kink *cough*)

"o-oh my god, darlin', squeezin' me so good- j-just like that, such a good girl for me, takin' it so well-"

"so tight, feels soo good my love, j-just one more for me-"

II:

♤ suddenly my ass is a drum

♤ would it be too on the nose to say he's an ass man who loveeees spanking? actually this is my post so IDC IM SAYIN IT

♤ ass man who loves spanking

♤ impact play in general i dare say

♤ mean slaps whenever you least expect them, wherever you least expect them - face, pussy, ass - he loves your reaction

♤ but can you blame him? you look so pretty looking up at him with those hazy, tear-filled eyes

♤ now vessel gets mean and rough just cause he's desperate. II gets mean and rough because he wants to wreck you. very different motivations there (though im a firm believer that ves has his mean streaks too)

♤ you've been misbehaving? have fun riding him with your hands tied and his hand around your throat. doesnt matter how bad your thighs hurt, he's not helping. also, youre not cumming

♤ loves fucking you face down ass up, with a hand on the back of your head or back of your neck to keep you pinned down

♤ edging ‼️ overstim ‼️ pain ‼️ degradation ‼️ thank you for coming to my ted talk

"you've been nothing but a slut all fuckin' day, throwin' yourself at Ive like that, and you think i'll let you cum? nah, fuck that. you got about another half an hour in you before that, if at all"

"such a pretty lil' bitch for me, crying on my dick like that. you like it when i hurt you? like it when i slap this fuckin pussy?"

"so dramatic, that was only your fourth orgasm. you got at least three more in you"

III:

♤ say it with me now, MESSY

♤ i think III is similar to ves' desperate side, but... more

♤ more desperate, more subby, more whiny, more drooly

♤ will beg. god knows for what but sure it's hot so why the hell would you stop him

♤ sometimes he gets so lost in it his thrusts get uncoordinated

♤ so sloppy, rutting into you like a dog in heat

♤ i could imagine a threesome between you, III and ves... where ves is the one in charge

♤ sitting on a chair next to the bed, running his mouth while III basically sobs while pumping into you

♤ god, he cums so much

♤ absolute loads

♤ idk if this is a hot take or not but possibly the subbiest of the boys?? though i still dont see him as a FULL on sub, maybe a switch? idek i feel like he could go either way

"oooh my fuckin' god doll, so good to me, so fuckin' good- feels so good- 'm gonna cum, cum inside that sweet pussy-"

"love you so much just- just lemme please- just the tip baby-"

"if you don't suck my dick right now i'm gonna lose my mind-"

IV:

♤ also one i see as being dominant

♤ such. a fucking. tease. lord help us all.

♤ learns how to play your body like a fuckin instrument within days, gets you sobbing and pleading within minutes

♤ after what feels like hours of teasing you - toying with and biting your nipples, leaving hickeys all over, touching everywhere but where you need him most - he finally gives in and fingers you and you swear to god you see stars

♤ we all know this man can use his fingers, the way he plays guitar. to him, your body is the most beautiful instrument and he'll be fuckin damned if he can't master it

♤ when he fucks you, he's so rough, all filthy words in your ear as his thick dick drags against your walls

♤ sigh, a biter

♤ leaves bite marks all over you

♤ not satisfied until youre sobbing and trembling beneath him, globs of his cum leaking out of your abused cunt (wrap it before you tap it)

♤ god help you when he discovers remote controlled vibrators

"so drunk on my dick, aren't ya love? that's okay. i'm takin' care or you, don't need to think anymore, just keep those legs nice and open for me"

"can't remember your own name, can ya, love? that's okay, only gotta know mine"

"good fuckin' girl, always so wet and ready for me..."

did i mention that i think they all share a HEAVY breeding kink? no? oops

[polskasroka]

EPIC thoughts after The Vengeance Saga aka my problems with how logic gets shattered in this saga

600 Strike depicts Odysseus as Athena wanted him to be at the very start. She wanted him to kill the cyclops, and he didn't do it because of his hubris and alleged mercy. Now he has no mercy.

Thereby, Athena's character arc stops making sense in regards to what is presented in The Venegance Saga. She's found the power of friendship with Telemachus, abandoning the "I'm not looking for a friend" mentality that led her in her anger. She uses said power of friendship and, in fact, asks Zeus for mercy for Odysseus. To win his game, she used her own wit and wisdom, the Goddess of Wisdom she is. However, "you rely on wit" stops being applicable to Odysseus. The wit, the trait he's best-known for, his most trusted weapon, is no longer of use against Poseidon. It's ruthlessness. It's the lack of mercy towards the other that he uses when arguments fail him. Poseidon has literally taught Odysseus a more important lesson than Athena.

And put your whole brain in it Remember every trick in your domain for this Odysseus' domain is mind, his wit. While he uses that with avoiding Charybdis, he doesn't do so during the confrontation with Poseidon. You'll need a mindset change for this I suppose he did change his mindset, as he says, I'm gonna use ruthlessness Every trick, every skill put to use for this I plan to put an end to all the foolishness I have to get home, put it all on the line I'll be dangerous

The second wind bag ex machina. One with Poseidon's storm. One that he gets defeated with. What. Then, Odysseus uses his trident against him. What x2. Why doesn't he defend himself? Why won't he try to fight back? Why would an immortal beg a mortal for mercy?

Also, it's said that Odysseus opened the wind bag to beat Poseidon. And then it's 600 Strike. So like. Odysseus has beaten him with the storm or with the power of his lost comraders OR both? Or am I not getting something?

OOC Poseidon asking Odysseus how he's gonna sleep at night. I'd rather expect Poseidon to laugh and tell Odysseus that he's finally learnt his lesson.

You can't tell me that Poseidon, being the pettiest bitch out there (love him for that), would NOT drown Ithaca after what Odysseus did to him. He'd damn make him watch and get in that damn water. He would get his revenge.

I generally think that what killed the logic was abandoning the source material too much, a problem that many modern media have. See, Charybdis being in the Vengeance saga fits well, it's just in the different part of Odysseus' journey. But there's no Odysseus beating up Poseidon's ass in The Odyssey. The Phaecians would've worked so well instead of the ordeal with Poseidon in The Vengeance Saga.

Also some nitpicking: 'Cause no mortal can pass Poseidon's storm Does this mean that whenever there's a storm at the sea, literally no ships can pass? It's not that every storm is inpenetrable. And if those inpenetrable ones are caused by Poseidon, who causes the penetrable ones?

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[gaylorvader]

Agatha All Along:Teen Identity Theory

Spoilers for episodes 1-3 and multiverse of madness

Disclaimer:Sorry if I repeat myself or ramble I'm writing this as I think of it. Also feel free to correct me on anything I get wrong or add to it.

Ok so this theory is very-

-but hear me out. So we don't know Teen's name, or his background. Either the sigil on him stopped Agatha from hearing it or something else did idk(the scene in the car). But my theory about him is that he might be Wiccan aka Billy Maximoff.

Now I know that there are hints that he's Agatha's lost son but I feel like that's too obvious and might be a misdirect. My dad watched it with me and he also agrees that it seems to obvious.

I don't know Wiccan's story exactly so I might get some shit wrong, please correct me if I do. But from just quickly looking it up it says that Wiccan(Billy) and Speed(Tommy) are reincarnations of Wanda's sons.

They both had different families before reuniting and realizing they're twins. So Teen having a dad at least doesn't disprove him being Wiccan.

Wiccan also didn't know that Wanda was his bio mother.

Knowing Wanda she's very protective of those she cares for, very much a "the world can burn as long as those I love are safe" type person. So I think maybe subconsciously or an alternate Wanda(though I'm leaning towards the 1st)put that sigil on him to protect him from other witches *cough*Agatha*cough* cause The Scarlet Witch's kids would obviously be a target for people like Agatha, so Wanda would want to protect them.

And I know you might be thinking "but Wanda's dead" but I don't think she is. We never see her body and in media there's a thing of "if you don't see a body they're not dead" and we haven't seen hers.

Yes in Agatha's magic prison thing there was "Wanda's" body but one:we never see the face, and two:that wasn't real it was an illusion.

My dad is also a big Marvel fan and has seen MoM with me as well as this show and he also doesn't think she's dead. Didn't after MoM and still doesn't. And unlike me he's not a Wanda simp

Yes we saw an explosion of her magic in MoM but again we haven't seen her body. We've seen Tony's, we've seen Natasha's, and we've seen Vision's, but no Wanda.

And if Teen really did break Agatha out of Wanda's spell, Wanda The Scarlett Witch Maximoff who's basically a GOD, who else could do that besides her son.

And I mean he has the same fashion sense, so clearly they're related /j

Also when looking for a good photo of him it seems like some other people have this theory so maybe it's not as crazy as I thought.

That's all I can think of for now, but if I think of anything else, either when the next episode comes out or whatever, I'll probably reblog this to add to it.

Thanks for coming to my TED Talk :)

[goldbug127]

Apologies in advance for a long post!

Okay, so I'm watching Transformers Prime for the first time and I just finished the amnesia episodes.

Naturally, I have thoughts. My main one being:

This version of Orion Pax is as feral and all over the place as TF One Orion Pax!!!

HE'S JUST QUIETER ABOUT IT!

Ok first of all, obviously we don't see a lot of this Orion and 75% of the time he's just tryna figure out where he is and what's happening but I believe there's enough there to comment on.

Onto the first scene I want to talk about!

Orion Pax has just been told that his entire home planet has been destroyed, by someone he knew no less. His reaction is one we would all expect from a soldier. Clenching his fist, promising to stop Ratchet, "this I vow with all my spark", etc. etc. BUT we forget, this guy thinks he is an archivist. As far as he's aware, this guy has never fought anyone before plus, we know from later that he doesn't even know he has weapons. And sure he may not explicitly say he plans to fight anyone but, as I said, he's an archivist, his little speech was someone with a big vocabulary's version of "it's on sight if I meet this guy!"

The next scene I would like to talk about is when Arcee manages to get aboard the decepticon ship. Orion is peacefully working on his computer when he starts hearing blaster fire outside the room! What we would most likely expect a calm, sensible archivist to do is, I don't know, ask what's going on? call for help? alert some security? hide? any other number of things that wouldn't put him in immediate and potentially life threatening danger? yes, that would be logical wouldn't it? but Orion? he decides the next obvious step is to walk out into the hallway into what he must assume is an active shooting situation. Then, after being told by a guard to return to his room to be safe, he thinks about it for a moment and then continues to go out of his way to look for the source of the commotion! While knowingly disobeying what he's been told are Megatron's direct orders! He's crazy!!

I also want to talk about how Orion reacts once he starts to become suspicious of Megatron. In the scene right after being confronted by Starscream and the scene later on when Megatron asks him about his progress, Orion Pax, now very sure that the decepticon could be dangerous, decides to lie directly to his face. I would also like to point out that, after one of these scenes, Megatron says that he has never been good at lying. Orion Pax has NEVER been good at lying, meaning that Megatron has seen Orion try to lie before. I don't even know why an archivist would need to lie but apparently he finds way to get in trouble enough that he does so frequently.

Adding on to this point - after Orion finds out he has guns (and realises he can absolutely obliterate others with a few shots (something our sweet historian should have probably been more concerned about)), this GUY decides to MARCH through the ground bridge!! find MEGATRON!!!! (aka the former gladiator and current head decepticon) AND THREATEN HIM!!?!!!?! Threaten him, no less, WITHOUT USING THE GUNS HE JUST DISCOVERED HE HAD! Orion decides to fight the LITERAL TANK using glorified knives. Naturally, Megatron wipes the floor with him in less than three seconds but the fact that he even tried is insane!!

Anyway, I'll probably think of more when I've had more time to think but that's all for now.

Orion is a mad lad in every iteration.

Thank you for coming to my Ted talk,

you're welcome,

I need sleep.

[starchaseriseverything]

James looks at Regulus' beautiful sunlit face. The sun is rising, and birds are chirping. It's the best day ever.

James resists the urge to kiss down Regulus' body until he wakes up. Instead, he gets dressed and shuts Regulus' door behind him.

James hears a door open at the other end of the hall. He turns toward the sound slowly and sees one of his best friends. He lets out a breath. It's not Sirius. Thank god.

James thinks for a minute.

That's Sirius' room.

Remus just came out of Sirius' room.

James laughs quietly. "I knew it." He whispers. "I fucking knew it."

"Shut up, James." Remus says, stalking over to him.

James smiles. "I knew it."

"What are you doing here?"

"Everyone already knows. It's obvious."

"Sirius doesn't."

Another door opens. Alice? James smiles in victory. "Knew it."

James and Marlene talk every week and when they start to get suspicious of someone, they take guesses to who their shagging.

Apparently, so far, James has got them right. Alice and Narcissa, Remus and Sirius, Mary and Lily, and even Dorcas and Marlene. He couldn't believe he got that one.

"You knew what?" Alice asks.

"I knew that you were shagging Cissa."

Alice rolls her eyes and walks over to them. "You're both standing in front of Regulus' door. I'm assuming James is the one shagging him and Remus is shagging Sirius." James eyes go wide. "It's obvious."

"Fair enough." Another door opens, and out comes Emmeline Vance, a Ravenclaw. "Emmeline Vance. Nice to see you." Emmeline turns around so fast that James thought she had to have had whiplash. "Pandora? Really?"

Emmeline Smirks. "No, don't even start that sentence." Remus says, holding his hand up to stop her.

They hear footsteps around the corner, and before they could hide, Ted comes into view. "My god." Emmeline says. "Andromeda. Definitely."

"Yeah, definitely." James replies, agreeing with her.

"My god. I thought you were Orion and Walburga." Ted says startled.

"Good for you, we're not." Alice says. She pauses. "Good for us too."

"What are you all doing here?" A voice asks. Rita.

"No way!" Emmeline shouts.

"Shut up." James says.

"Sorry."

"Bellatrix. You're shagging Bella." James smiles. "Marls owes me so much gallons."

"Can we not?" Another voice sounds. Barty.

"I'm even more rich." James says proudly.

"How good are you at guessing?" Alice asks.

"Pretty good, actually. I even guessed Marls and Cas."

"Damn." Barty says, surprised.

Multiple doors open, and Evan, Pandora, Narcissa, Bellatrix, and Andromeda come out in the hallway. "What is going on?" Bellatrix asks.

Pandora smiles. "Panda? What are you smiling about?" Her brother, Evan, asks.

"Nothing."

James purses his lips. "Yeah, I'm gonna go before Siri comes out. Right Al?"

"Yep, coming."

Narcissa grabs Alice' arm. "Not so fast. We're going back in. Yeah?"

While Alice is debating, James hears another door open but doesn't see which one. "Mon soleil?" Regulus asks. "Holy shit."

James turns around and sees his boyfriend. "Hey, mi estrella."

"What is going on?"

Barty smiles. "Sirius is about to come out any minute."

Sure enough, Sirius comes out of his room. "Mon crossiant de lune?" Sirius looks around. "Alice!? James!?"

Alice purses her lips. "I'll take you up on that offer now." She says to her girlfriend, and they go back in Narcissa' room.

"What the fuck?"

Remus walks over to Sirius and starts pushing him slowly back in his room. "Let's go back in, fy nghariad."

Sirius grumbles, turns around to go back in, and stops. "We will talk about this later, Prongs." They go back in.

"So, that happened." Pandora says.

"I say we do the same and go back in our rooms, yeah?" Emmeline says.

They all agree and go back in. "Come on, mon soleil." Regulus says.

"I should really go."

Regulus starts kissing up James' jaw line. He stops. "Are you sure?"

James grumbles and drags his boyfriend back in the room.

[craycray-wolf]

OKAY BUT Y'ALL. I'm genuinely curious. About the Monster Falls au. Fyi this post is going to be me throwing crap at the walls to see what sticks.

When it comes to Monster Falls...why has no one ever suggested a Harpy or Werecat for Mabel?? I feel like these monsters also fit our Mabes. Now the question for Werecat Mabel- is her body like that of a faun or a tuar?

I mostly agree with the main cast's monsters (erm Deer-per is precious??) aside from Mabel even if Merm/Unicorn her is cool

Also Wendy is usually a werefox but I feel that a werewolf also fits (especially considering how hairy werewolves are. Who else is hairy? Oh yeah! The Corduroy men)

According to the GF au wiki Soos is a clay golem. It works! I think we can still get creative with this! He could be a slime or alien (I'm picturing Toy Story lmao. "You saved my life dudes, I'm eternally grateful") or robot or faun or really any monster lol. I suppose he's of Mexican descent and therefore could be a Mexican creature! Maybe HE'S the unicorn because he's pure of heart...🥺 He could also still be a human super hyped that his friends are now monsters. What we think y'all I'm stumped.

Again going by the wiki Pacifica is either a gorgon or unicorn. I ABSOLUTELY LOVE THE IDEA OF GORGON PACIFICA I just wanted to propose a nymph as an idea. Do I want gorgon or nymph...

"Old Man McGucket is usually a scarecrow, warlock or a demon." - GF AU wiki. Ehh idk about these. Maybe McGucket is the slime? A cow creature or smth? A Kill Billy? Oh, he's a Kill Billy I found it! EUREKA!!

Now that I'm thinking about it Gravity Falls/Journal 3 specific monsters could be included in the ideas. Soos is another Abominable Broman haha.

Gideon is said to be a vampire, which just makes sense (bloodsucker lmao). I purpose an alternative: gnome.

Once again according to GF wiki Candy is a kappa. I say no. It's a cute idea but I'm also iffy about it considering the fact that Candy is of Korean/Chinese descent and a kappa is from Japanese folklore. That's not to say species/monsters can't cross nationality/ethnic boundaries, I'm just saying why not a Korean or Chinese monster? For example a g/kumiho (Korean) or qilin/kirin (Chinese/Korean)!

It also says Melody is a Harpy. Approved. She can apparently also be a ghost which is fine but Harpy Melody is adorable thx. I suppose maybe she's the mermaid of the bunch but now I'm team harpy

Is Tad Strange still a human? Or a piece of bread? IS HE THE SQUARE VERSION PEOPLE THEORIZED ABOUT

Maybe Tyler Cutebiker is half werepuma half werepanther...or a bunny or smth

Okay I'm going to stop now before I list the entire town of Gravity Falls.

General ideas for grabs for anyone: fairies, ghosts, skeletons, nagas/lamias, mummies, angels, demons, nephilim, dragons, ANY MONSTER REALLY.

I haven't had proper progress on my initial GF askblog BUT I'M GONNA MAKE A MONSTER FALLS AU WHY THE HELL NOT. Stay tuned! I'll be adapting an existing but inactive blog of mine for these purposes.

Thanks for coming to my (frankly unhinged) TEd talk it's been lit fam 🤙

[the-fictive-haven]

Hey, note to neopronoun users we may interact with in the future:

We respect you. We respect what you identify with and want to be called. Our system even has some neos users (KAngel for example uses ten/tenshis tenself).

We are also collectively autistic/ADHD and struggle with memory, particularly when it comes to names and, unfortunately, learning new pronouns.

We will do our absolute best to avoid misgendering you. That might mean we ask for your pronouns multiple times because we genuinely forgot. If we use the wrong pronouns for you by accident, please gently correct us. We will try to remember to write them down somewhere but even that slips our mind half the time.

This applies to it/its users as well. We will absolutely use these for you! We don't understand people who say it's "dehumanizing", like, it's asking you to use them and that's the point oftentimes anyway?

Anyways thanks for coming to my TED talk I'll stop rambling now /silly

[the-fruity-magical-girls]

Nerdy Prudes Must Sing - Chapter 1

The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals

Warning: Bad Language

He hated musicals. Every single one. He was the most popular kid in school. The top dog. A literal monster. Why would he like musicals?

'That stuff is for nerds.' Max thought to himself.

Speaking of nerds... One is trying to unlock his locker while trying to be discreet. He is grabbing playbills he made for the school's next musical Barbeque Monologues.

"Hey Shit Lips!" Max yelled at the nerd.

"It's Lipschitz. Richard Lipschi-" Richie said turning around and seeing Max. His eyes widen with fear. "M-max Jagerman!"

"What are you doing Shit Lips?"

"J-just you know... Looking through my locker and stuff..."

Max yanked one of the playbills out of Richie's hands.

"You into this shit?"

"Oh no. I'm not a big musical fan."

"...What?" Max said confused.

"I mean I don't mind them but I just don't... Like them... I mean anime is the superior mediu- and I'm talking too much." Richie rambled.

"Hmm... You're alright. I'll let you go... For now."

"... Uh..."

"See ya later Shit Lips!" Max yelled while walking away.

"Ok... What the fuck just happened?" Richie said confused as he was walking to the theater where his friends Ruth and Peter are.

He walked over to the theater and sees an old professor from the local college. He must be the director. As he tries to walk past to try and find Ruth or Peter he is stopped.

"Hello young student!" An eccentric voice said. "I'm the director Henry Hidgens! I haven't seen you before."

"Oh um... I'm not apart of the play... Uh... Do you know where Ruth is?"

"Oh she's setting up the lights with some other boy."

"Thank you sir." Richie stated as he went to where his friends are.

"Richie! Do you have the playbills?" Ruth asked.

"Yep!" He said handing them over.

"Richie these look amazing!" Peter said but he noticed Richie's clearly confused expression. "Hey... what happened?"

"Oh nothing... Just confused about something."

"Spill it Richie! I don't have the time!" Ruth snapped clearly stressed.

"Ok um... Max just... Let me go. Like no bullying or anything!"

"What!?" Peter yelled!

"I-i don't know!"

Before Peter could say anything else his phone dings.

"Oh shit! Ted's picking me up! I forgot!" Peter yelled while he quickly packed up his things.

"Can I come with?" Richie asked.

"Uh... Ok?"

"Oh sure! Just leave me with the lights! Ok!" Ruth stated in a passive aggressive manner.

"Hey you signed up for this. Not us." Peter retorts gesturing at himself and Richie.

"Touché."

Richie and Peter left the building and walked over to Ted's car.

An: Sorry if the writing is bad. I tried my best.

[carlatsukinamistolemyhamsandwich]

I always said I'd never post anything like this when I was actually active on this blog as I didn't want to start drama but you know what, screw it, I'm not here anymore and I'm tired of staying silent on this.

The way some of the fandom treats Yui is absolutely nuts.

And no, I'm not talking about people who call Yui "weak" or who get jealous over her situation (that's a whole other can of worms), I am talking about the other obsessive fans.

I'll start off by saying I am not saying all Yui fans are bad (some are delightful) but I swear she also manages to attract some of the most unhinged people I've encountered on the internet.

I can't even begin to name all the posts I've seen defending her and arguing against anyone who would call her weak or criticise her in any way etc. And while I know there certainly are people who call her weak or fanfictions where she acts as a love rival for one of the boys versus an OC or reader character, I've actually seen far less of those posts than ones defending her, to an almost problematic degree. Like I literally once saw a post where someone was genuinely telling people to kill themselves because they were treating Yui badly in fanfiction and like what the actual fuck?

I personally have no gripes with Yui as a character. She's written to be exactly what the story needed, and if you like kind cinnamon roll characters, she definitely falls into that category, but people don't have to like characters just because they're good people.

In the same way, the diaboys are all terrible to some extent and if they were real people, you wouldn't want anything to do with them. However, I would argue all of them are well-thought out characters with interesting backstories that clearly tie into who they are by the time the series starts. An immoral character =/= a badly written character in the same way a moral character =/= a well written character.

Now I'm not trying to say Yui is a badly written character, as I mentioned above, I think she fits the role she needed to in DL perfectly, but I do think people need to stop treating her like literal perfection at the expense of actual real human beings. I'll admit, I have seen people dislike Yui for immature reasons, but you can't have a go at people for not liking a fictional character.

I know, and have seen, some people argue that your attitude towards Yui reflects your attitude towards rl abuse survivors and just no. That's not how that works. If someone is reading an account of actual abuse and starts victim blaming that's one thing but DL is NOT REAL and it was never meant to be an allegory about abuse or abusive relationships, it's made for people who are horny about vampires. That's it. There is no deeper meaning. I cannot emphasise this enough.

I think if there's any real point here, it's that if some of these fans genuinely value morality and goodness as much as they claim, they would take a good look in the mirror at how they treat real people. If you love Yui so much, use her an example (i.e. being nice), not some icon to beat people over the head with. And people liking and enjoying the darker aspects of DL doesn't make them bad people in the same way watching a horror film doesn't make you a future serial killer.

Anyway thank you for coming to my TED talk. Again, I am not talking about all Yui fans, just the worst ones I've seen. And to be fair a lot of the points I've made here are true for rabid diaboy fans as well. At the end of the day, it's how you treat other people, not fictional characters, that matters.

[aretheyqueer]

Are they nonbinary?

disclaimer: this is a hc, not speculating on what the writers intentions were.

reason: Alright. This is it boys. my time to shine. For this show most people have never heard of. ahem clears throat.

Arte Spaletti. For starters, a quote from *episode one*: "I'm done being a woman! I'll cut off my hair and maybe my chest too!" Now my dear onlookers you may think. "Isn't this a headcanon blog? That sure doesn't sound very canonly cis!" Except for the narrative then proceeds to forget about this scene entirely.

Arte spends the series crossdressing a few times, and seems uncomfortable being referred to as a man *or* a woman. Again. The show still treats Arte as a woman. And the fandom themselves has this.. strange idea that "If you headcanon Arte as trans, the shows feminist narrative falls apart!" I will not get into why I think this is stupid but. God cannot stop me from acknowledging this beautiful silly individual for being the least cis person I have ever set eyes on. Thank you for coming to my ted talk. I'd love to hear other peoples opinions on this character as well.

[thana-topsy]

The Neloth Post Nobody Asked For but now I'm making it everyone's problem

I guess I'll start out by saying: all of this pertains to my very specific version of Neloth who can be found alive and well (for now) in my fic series "Legends Never Die". It's a big wide fandom, I do not claim to be an authority on Anything, and I think everyone's little pocket universes and OC-ification of NPCs are all equally valid. These are just some of the ways I write and characterize him. So if you have any Neloth headcannons of your own, please sound off!

The Basics:

I estimate this old crusty bastard is in his 700s, or thereabouts, probably on the later end. He stopped counting at a certain point and can't be arsed to keep a talley. There are more important things that occupy his brainspace. He maintains his spry and youthful visage [cough] through his rigorous magical practices, (and his not-so-subtle interest in necromancy and discovering the secrets to immortality).

He was exiled decided to retire from the Telvanni Council a good fifty or sixty years before the eruption of Red Mountain, retreating to Solstheim to continue his experiments in seclusion. Due to severing his mainland ties and House loyalties, his power and influence are significantly weakened, though he continues to expand his studies and has a relatively well-functioning settlement of workers, as well as his current apprentice, Talvas Fathryon, under his tutelage.

And of course, the question on everyone's mind: do he fuck? In terms of his sexuality, he's finicky and if I had to slap a label on him, he's definitely in the realm of Aro-Ace, but on the gray side of things (pun intended???). Here, have an Ace Neloth Pride Flag because why not:

Personal Interests, Likes, and Dislikes:

The list of dislikes could probably rival the "color of the sky" post, so let's try to condense that into the main point: he dislikes inefficiency. The definition of what he finds "inefficient" can and does vary greatly, even in his own work. I would say one of his driving motivators is IncreasE Efficiency, above all else.

His likes are few and far between. As it stands, I could probably list three off-hand. He likes well-made tea (preferably dark, bitter, and stimulating), he likes an organized bookshelf, and he likes Teldryn Sero (who is also dark, bitter, and.... stimulating).

Morality:

Huh? What's that? Never heard of it.

I kid (kind of). Neloth has a complicated psychology. I characterize him to have underdeveloped empathy, but he is not entirely devoid of it. I suppose I'll let him explain it, (from chapter 5 of "Breathing Water"):

“I do…” Neloth began, [...] “I do… feel.” He twisted the stiff bedroll between his fingers. “I do.” [...]  “It’s just…” He didn’t know where he was going with this, but the words were clawing their way out of him like some kind of sick, emaciated animal emerging from a cave. “I don’t think I… feel… correctly.” He exhaled sharply, letting his head roll from side to side, neck popping. “I’ve always been this way. It’s not just the result of graying morals from a prolonged life. I’ve always had this,” he gestured to his chest with trembling fingers, “hole. Like something’s missing.” He pulled the bedroll tighter around him, curling in on himself. A small laugh. “It’s been useful, if I’m honest.” 

He does try, at a certain point, to understand this side of himself a little bit better. Though, honey, he's got a big storm coming.

Anyways, that's my Neloth post for now, maybe I'll add more another time. :) Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.