Tumgik
#I know this. I learned it myself on other accounts.
eldrith · 2 days
Text
omg heyyyyy guys!!! <3 tldr for those of you who aren't the stupid cunt still spewing shit in inboxes: thanks for being kind & supportive and fucking normal. appreciate you beyond words, genuinely. my inbox is always open to you.
but to whom it may concern,
i am so fucking serious when i say that you, anon, need to grow up and start talking to real life humans for once in your life.
this isn't a joke. i'm so so so fucking embarrassed for this imbecile who stalks mutuals and any writer or account with decency in this fandom. you're so embarrassing. you are so clearly out of touch, there is something so clearly wrong in your tiny little pebble brain. it's a miracle you can even type words onto a screen because you're so inconceivably obtuse. (btw, you may need to reel in the extent of your lexicon - if you know what that is - for some of the things im about to say)
not only are you so impossibly, functionally incapable when it comes to media literacy - sorry, literacy at all - but you actively seek out to make incorrect points and its so troublesome... you need to learn context, subtext, implicit bias, nuance - honestly, grab a dictionary and look up what the term 'critical thinking' means too. you are SEVERELY lacking. you are deficient in communication and even worse with inference. i could laugh, and i have before.
despite the fact that this is all fictional - the truth is that we are all just people on here who enjoy writing or maybe enjoy a character from a fictional show that isn't even about romance in the first place.
anyways, i digress: the truth is that every single one of my friends on here has gotten this person's weird fucking obsessive comments in their inbox and as pathetic as this person is, i will say this directly to them: you treat writers or other blogs like some sort of sad therapy and you're being embarrassing.
i'm embarrassed when i see the cringey, out of touch shit you say. you act like a minor. i genuinely think you are one. you act like someone who has never had a personal relationship, let alone conversation. i don't think you've had an emotional connection ever. you act like a fucking baby who just crawled out of a sewer to see light for the first time in your life. it's so fucking sad. i would never care enough to say i feel bad for you, but i feel bad for anyone who has ever interacted with you, myself included.
it's so astounding to have to say this, but: WRITERS AND BLOGGERS ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING THERAPISTS. WE ARE NOT A HOTLINE FOR YOU. here, you’re so stupid you probably didn’t catch that: WE ARE NOT YOUR FUCKING THERAPISTS. YOU ARE BEING A FUCKING CHILD.
i beg you - i implore you to fucking block me, to block all of my mutuals who you come to whining in their inboxes, because NONE OF US FUCKING CARE what you have to say. pick up a book. talk to a man irl. ask someone how their day is and try to use empathy for once.
anyways, i love every single person on here who takes the time to be kind, or funny, or care. i love all my writers, all of my friends on here, moots or not - sorry to say this but im tired of pretending that i'm nice to childish pathetic cunts. lol
48 notes · View notes
nthspecialll · 16 hours
Note
You are literally the best rdr account ever fr, your rants are not biased at all and i love it. Because some ppl rly should drop their ranting bcs it's obvious that they are more talking about their imagination about that character than actual facts.
I am so glad you think so because I sometimes noticed that too. From time to time it feels like people have an idea of a character and try to make the game fit around that rather than actually make the game sculp the character. That sounded very messy so: They make the evidence try to fit the result they want rather than letting the evidence form the result. And to be honest I think that is a little... Well offensive to the developers?
I am a writer, I write books and if someone tried to discard part of a character I spent years making because they felt like it, I think I would get annoyed, I even get annoyed reading it. Like it is fine if it is just jokes ya know? Like "Kieran is just a baby" as a joke but also being able to see that there is so much more to him, that is fine, but if you just refuse to acknowledge that there is more... No.
Another thing is glorification, I do not like people glorifying characters, again not as a joke, I think it is like ignoring a whole part of the character, the "mean" part of the character. Take Javier, I love Javier, he has so many nice and sweet sides, but I also know he is an asshole in chapter 6, that said I know people are not assholes for no reason, I know Javier had a reason to act the way he did. Do I think him acting like an asshole is a-okay? No, but I also know that there is nuance to it.
I have also seen it the other way around, where people make a character worse than they are? Like especially the women of the game, but also Javier and Bill. Again, dismissing part of a character that someone has put sweat, tears and blood into is not okay.
Media literacy is also a massive thing in this game because it is a historically accurate game in so many ways, and again, people who intentionally dismissive it because "Oh I wouldn't do that" are blind to history, because of course you wouldn't, you grew up in modern days with modern ideals and you got internet to educate yourself outside of whatever ideals and things were put into your head by those immediately around you.
I always strive to get as much information about characters as I can, to show both sides and to find out why do characters do what they do even if I don't agree with it. I remember when I learned that Javier did in fact point his gun at John and I at first got annoyed but then I caught myself and was like "that is fucking stupid ignoring it, face it and find out why."
To clarify, I am not shitting on people making jokes about characters, I do it too, nor am I shitting on people who does not have all information (I am not telling them to go research everything and "oh they must know every small detail to even speak about this character"), I am not shitting on people who have different opinions on characters, I am shitting on the people who chose to ignore parts of characters because that fits their narritive.
These characters are wildly deep and complex, allow them to be, and I know some people are going to say "oh that is so dramatic" and maybe, but that is my opion and if you don't agree just scroll, I am not forcing you to be here.
If you read all that, thank you! Here is a pic of Javier because I love him:
Tumblr media
17 notes · View notes
goldkirk · 27 days
Text
hey this isn’t aimed at anyone in particular but I’m saying it for the record here: if I tell you no, please stop messaging me about fundraisers and mutual aid.
I get enough messages that it’s impossible for me to keep up without devoting at least half an hour each day, when I’m not even on tumblr that long most days. Me having a boundary about this isn’t a moral failing, it’s a lifeboat for me on my own blog.
In my personal life I’m already advocating and donating literally as much as I can spare. This is not me not caring, it’s just me not willing to interact with that on the one place I go online to not interact with irl news and world events for the most part.
I cannot be upset all the time. I cannot be upset everywhere. I cannot use all my emotional and mental energy fielding my own upset from ongoing events. My options are to hold boundaries about this or stop coming online at all.
I’m all for sharing information and signal boosting to reasonable extents, but the scale of it this year is so large and so enduring that it is literally not possible to for me to participate on every account I have. I’ve previously shared links to Gaza eSIM donations and a major hub of verified Go Fund Mes here and elsewhere online. We, the online humans, know how to look those things up ourselves by now. There are many, many people choosing to do advocacy work, and right now, I can’t be one of them.
If you’re extremely upset when I tell you I can’t share/donate right now about a Gaza family or personal fundraiser you ask me to share here, just unfollow and block me. That’s what those buttons are for. Protect your own emotions and energy and get me off your feed instead of staying upset and continuing to engage with online people or content that upsets you.
Please don’t send repeated angry messages based on manufactured purity politics and moral outrage into my messages and inbox when I exercise the right to run my own blog.
#and on that note#I also think some people need to sit down and ask themselves#if their old end times anxieties and fears and preparations and word spreading#haven’t filtered straight into a new non religious end of society and end of modern world order anxiety that they’re pushing on other peopl#even if it is the end times#you cannot change that by beating your own anxieties into other people’s heads#people can care MORE when they are GIVEN ROOM TO BREATHE#first rule of sustainable activism is you can’t do it constantly and you can’t push it on people constantly#you have to pace it and you have have have have HAVE to play long games#short term activism burns you out and if it leads to full despair from burnout it can get you killed via depression#it’s not a joke#there’s a reason your elders have books and community lore about healthy activism even in times of crisis#they lived it. they learned from it. learn from them.#spend your time doing things that can make real impacts.#do little things online but unless you’re an actual information hub you shouldn’t be posting constantly about it#people won’t even want to follow you anymore eventually because that’s not why they followed you#and then you have no audience for your important message anyway.#I know this. I learned it myself on other accounts.#please. stop. harassing me.#how is harassing me going to make me MORE willing to change my mind and post? just because you demanded it?#I am an autonomous person#this is my ONE curated space on the website#you have a multitude of tags and other users#don’t waste energy on a person who already told you no. let’s call that activism rule number two#spend your energy where it’s not likely to be wasted#you’re needed for a long haul#act like it 😭#and stop spamming me 😭#hey little star whatcha gonna queue?
58 notes · View notes
leejihoonownsmyheart · 4 months
Note
brie ive read your secret account fics without knowing it was you 😮
SO MY DISGUISE WAS WORTH IT-!
2 notes · View notes
feinstone · 4 months
Note
Congratulations on graduating! That must be an amazing feeling.
thank youuuu <3
technically i won't be graduating until the end of the year because i finished past the cut off date for my uni's mid-year graduation ceremonies, but i'm happy to have finished regardless.
it's been a really difficult and long process, and i had to delay finishing my degree by 2 years due to a long string of Life Events (Not Fun) that got in the way of me completing the last 2 courses i had left in my degree as of mid-2022, so i'm glad i finally managed to get to the end of a semester without some random bullshit stopping me for the first time in several years lmao.
i dropped out of high school after i got sick, and i thought i was gonna have to drop out of uni too, despite all the work i've put in to pull my life together. it really means a lot to me that i managed to make it through to the end this time, even though it was tough to keep my head above water sometimes.
#ask#thegrinninggametile#it feels nice to actually finish something for once#i've never really done it before#i dunno#it feels like i'm bragging and i hate talking about accomplishing anything because it feels really selfish and egotistical#but i'm really proud of myself#i know it's not impressive and most of the people i grew up with graduated years ago but still#i proved to myself that i CAN see smth like this through to the end even when it gets really tough yknow?#only vaguely related but i refuse to call myself a 'graduand' until december and act like i haven't already completed the degree#despite my encyclopedic knowledge of my uni's policy and procedure library#if they want to make me wait over 6 months after i finish before actually giving me my testamur and saying i've graduated#then i'm saying i've graduated anyway#i've got all the pieces of paper that say i'm done besides the actual testamur#so policy and procedure definitions dictionary articles 14/232PL and 14/233PL can huff my shorts :P#(i used to work at my university and part of my job was basically committing the policy and procedure library to memory)#(so i could teach other students how to navigate the school's systems and how things work)#(and also to hold members of staff/departments accountable for failing to follow university policy when interacting with disabled students)#(i really enjoyed that job sometimes)#(plus i'm just autistic and liked learning about how all the systems of a large university are developed and interface with each other)#sweet.txt
2 notes · View notes
assmaster-8000 · 10 months
Note
Those were all hallucinations because if you're patient rook he'll be the best lover anyone could have he'd take you out to the sweetest dates they feel like you're living a fairy tale, as soon as 12 am hits on your anniversary he'll be awake, just to kiss your face and hold you tightly, it's important to him even if he knows you don't realize it's happening, and once you do wake up you wake up to the sweetest man to ever exist he won't leave your side at all in that day he couldn't bear to do so, that's why he makes sure to clear up everything in his schedule two weeks before. he'd want to travel the world by your side, take you to experiences he knows you'll never forget and cherish forever he wants you to be by his side at all times of his life he can't imagine how he'd be had you not stayed by his side despite his flaws
ur so sweet aster it'd almost be inconceivable if there were ever a situation else wise 😵
for realsies though i may be an easily irritated person, im very patient in dealing with people and emotionally tense situations so me and rook? we gang fr we tight like a booty hole in here 🤭 im a very heavy sleeper so unless rook shakes me by the neck to give me a kiss i would NAWT gaf 🔥🔥🔥
2 notes · View notes
scarletcomet · 2 years
Text
i feel like I'm gonna cry. not for any particular reason other than *gestures vaguely*
#and i don't really cry that often other than sometimes at movies/tv#i think if a normal person experienced the thoughts and feelings i have constantly they would cry a lot#that's why i've always hated ppl calling me sensitive if i were to cry#anyways#i'm just super stressed about school#have a huge programminh assignment due wednesday where the only instruction we were given was to learn at least 1 new language or framework#on our own. so i've had to like teach myself all this shit and i have no idea what i'm doing#i have astrophysics hw due last night i need to submit by tuesday and i have no idea what's going on in that class#i have a huge exam on wednesday where we aren't allowed a notecard or anything and i can't remember things#and i have another exam on thursday that i need to do super well on because i did badly on the last one#and i don't really know what's going on in that class either#i feel like i just don't have enough time to do all the things i need to do even though i've been working nonstop#on friday i was literally working on my code for that big assignment until 2 am#as of rn you can register and login to my shopping site#if youre logged in you can then view items and add items and log out#you can click to just view 1 item and delete items (even if they're not yours oops)#currently trying to get update item to work (and failing miserably)#said on my rubric (which i made before i knew anything about the frameworks i chose to learn)#that you would be able to leave comments on items and view and add money to your account#oh and i also got to make it so you can actually buy an item#i also allocated 20 points towards a creative portion which is just doing a lot of additional stuff i didnt specify#i have so much to do and so little time#i'm using React (a js framework) for the frontend and Laravel (a php framework) for the backend and like none of the TAs know laravel rip#the TAs are practically useless anyway and the prof doesn't have any office hours#panicking#so much to do#i haven't started studying for either of my exams this week#and i don't even go to lectures for one of the classes and we're still learning new stuff on tuesday#i need to not sleep but i get so sleepy#im so bad at focusing in my apt but the library closes at midnight and is only open 24hrs during reading and finals week
7 notes · View notes
curly-cottage-girl · 2 years
Text
///
#just feeling a lot of things and I don’t like them bc they’re kinda ugly#I know this yearning and gaping hole in my chest is ultimately supposed to be filled with God#at least in the sense that I’m not driven to envy over others being loved more than me#but I def have not been good with prayer lately. at all :/#I’m feeling discouraged in many ways too. I want to try to do more hobbies but the learning curve is so steep when i look at them#and I already have almost no motivation anyway so that discourages me even more#I wish I WANTED to do stuff#I wish I had plans and goals in my life bc as I get older it’s more embarrassing when i talk with ppl#had a preliminary meeting with a guy who does financial advising and that kind feel flat bc like#I have no goals I’m working towards#and also I don’t even know how to describe myself and what I like and all#I caved and thought maybe I’ll make a Catholic match profile bc maybe God wants me to be more proactive#even if I don’t think I would ever be able to do anything like online dating at all#bc I can’t even do regular dating irl#I want to have known the person for a long time first#but anyway that’s ANOTHER whole thing#so anyway I stopped making my account when I had to describe myself for the profile and I just drew a blank#like sorry I don’t do or like anything :/#I mean it’s not true but it also kinda is?#but yeah now I get all sorts of emails from catholic match and I can’t unsubscribe bc you have to sign in to unsubscribe#and I technically don’t have an account yet -_- bc I didn’t finish… so stupid#maybe I should go back to therapy….#but I really was feeling like I had hit a plateau. like really it was stuff in my life that needed to change#or spiritual healing and growth#and there was only so much that talking could do by that point after I had done a good amount of growing in self knowledge#not like it ever ends really but also I had to wake up early to have them before work#and also it’s money so yeah I stopped :/#so IDK#idk what to do#either in my life or for my mental/emotional state
9 notes · View notes
nosygay · 21 days
Text
whatever you do at work do NOT admit you understand anything math-related unless it's all you ever want to deal with I guess
1 note · View note
an-incoherent-mess · 3 months
Text
I casually used the phrase: "built like a brick shithouse" today and was met with utter confusion as to what that meant.
During the time it took me to find my phone and google it I was convinced I had made the expression up and was genuinely delusional.
0 notes
catboydan · 3 months
Text
.
1 note · View note
pears-trinkets · 6 months
Text
.
#the whole vet situation gives me such trauma whiplash im too busy with that that i havent really given myself a chance to process today#all i can think about is how painful eating must be for mischa#i noticed she slowed down a bit and wouldnt eat kibble or hard snacks but i thought it might be one single tooth ache idk#i actually thought she was doing better because she slowed down because she has been gulping down food way too fast since the shelter#the last time she had tooth problems like 2-3 years ago i asked a friend to come with me to the vet and she said omg yes of course#and then she resumed texting me normal stuff throughout the day of the appointment and only after i didnt reply the whole day she noticed#like 10 hours too late she was like OH SHIT HAHA!! and this is literally what happens every time when i ask someone to be there for me#when i make myself really vulnerable and ask for help and say that i cant do something alone they let me down#while knowing that i have no one else#i asked my mom to come to the vet once and she literally only talked about herself the whole time distracting me#and then she was like haha yeah lets just drop off the cat at home and go get some lunch hihi!!!!#she never remembers vet appointments even when we just talked about them and loves making fun of me for being stressed and tense#like OH NO WONDER YOU WERE MOODY like im on my period or something#i texted a friend about mischas health issues and me losing my job and she hasnt replied since january and doesnt really talk to me anymore#so i guess that friendship is done too#ill have to go there on thursday alone and overdraft my account and wait until the evening and care for mischa all alone#i cant even talk with someone about this because no one understands or judges my emotions and no one cares anyway#and then ill have to go back to work where everyone knows that i will be gone soon and will pester me about it#they all think of me as a temporary intern anyway and ask WHEN WILL YOU GO FIND A REAL JOB while they make me do theirs#everything and everyone at that job is so horrible and so many people leave and they never learn#a colleague i helped teaching everything suddenly turned on me &my other colleague & made our lives miserable while badmouthing us viciously#and everyone in the office chose her over us and let her get away with it while she screamed at us and behaved like a child#its so ironic how i stayed because i needed money to live and now when i go i will have 0 because of the surgery#i mean its worth it but like#what the fuck is life and what will it fucking be next month
1 note · View note
mushiishrooms · 6 months
Text
I always thought that gaslighting could only exist in the form of obvious lying about something the perpetrator did or said, but I learned from my own experiences that it can also look like making the victim doubt their own social reasoning skills. By definition, gaslighting is making the victim doubt their perception of reality. Which is why when it was happening, I didn't realize it was gaslighting. I'm a person who struggles with social cues and socializing in general, so when they would told things like "that's not what I said, you're putting words in my mouth" when it was implied with what they said, I accepted it because "well they didnt directly say it..." I'm used to literal speaking having so many autistic friends and I figured I was just making something out of nothing. It made me feel crazy, and I constantly doubted myself and my reasoning on things. even when I would ask a friend and they would agree on the implications.
1 note · View note
Text
Fandom can do a little gatekeeping. As a treat.
So I finally decided to archive-lock my fics on AO3 last night. I’ve been considering it since the AI scrape last year, but the tipping point was this whole lore.fm debacle, coupled with some thoughts I’ve been thinking regarding Fandom These Days in general and Fandom As A Community in particular. So I wanna explain why I waited so long, why I locked my stuff up now, and why I’ve come to the conclusion that I’m a-okay with making it harder for people to see my stories.
Lurkers really are great, tho
I’m a chronic lurker, and have been since I started hanging out on the internet as a teen in the 00s. These days it’s just cuz I don’t feel a need to socialize very often, but back then it was because I was shy and knew I was socially awkward. Even if I made an account, I’d spend months lurking on message boards or forums or Livejournals, watching other people interact and getting a feel for that particular community’s culture and etiquette before I finally started interacting myself. And y’know, that approach saved me a lot of embarrassment. Over the course of my lurking on any site, there was always some other person who’d clearly joined up five minutes after learning the place existed, barged in without a care for their behavior, and committed so many social faux pas that all the other users were immediately annoyed with them at best. I learned a lot observing those incidents. Lurk More is Rule 33 of the internet for very good reason.
Lurking isn’t bad or weird or creepy. It’s perfectly normal. I love lurking. It’s hard for me to not lurk - socializing takes a lot of energy out of me, even via text. (Heck it took 12 hours for me to write this post, I wish I was kidding--) Occasionally I’ll manage longer bouts of interaction - a few weeks posting here, almost a year chatting in a discord there - but I’m always gonna end up going radio silent for months at some point. I used to feel bad about it, but I’ve long since made peace with the fact that it’s just the way my brain works. I’m a chronic lurker, and in the long term nothing is going to change that.
The thing with being a chronic lurker is that you have to accept that you are not actually seen as part of the community you are lurking in. That’s not to say that lurkers are unimportant - lurkers actually are important, and they make up a large proportion of any online community - but it’s simple cause and effect. You may think of it as “your community”, but if you’ve never said a word, how is the community supposed to know you exist? If I lurked on someone’s LJ, and then that person suddenly friendslocked their blog, I knew that I had two choices: Either accept that I would never be able to read their posts again, or reach out to them and ask if I could be added to their friends list with the full understanding that I was a rando they might not decide to trust. I usually went with the first option, because my invisibility as a lurker was more important to me than talking to strangers on the internet.
Lurking is like sitting on a park bench, quietly people-watching and eavesdropping on the conversations other people are having around you. You’re in the park, but you’re not actively participating in anything happening there. You can see and hear things that you become very interested in! But if you don’t introduce yourself and become part of the conversation, you won’t be able to keep listening to it when those people walk away. When fandom migrated away from Livejournal, people moved to new platforms alongside their friends, but lurkers were often left behind. No one knew they existed, so they weren’t told where everyone else was going. To be seen as part of a fandom community, you need to submit to the mortifying ordeal of being known, etc. etc.
There’s nothing wrong with lurking. There can actually be benefits to lurking, both for the lurkers and the communities they lurk in. It’s just another way to be in a fandom. But if that is how you exist in fandom--and remember, I say this as someone who often does exist that way in fandom--you need to remember that you’re on the outside looking in, and the curtains can always close.
I’ve always been super sympathetic to lurkers, because I am one. I know there’s a lot of people like me who just don’t socialize often. I know there’s plenty of reasons why someone might not make an account on the internet - maybe they’re nervous, maybe they’re young and their parents don’t allow them to, maybe they’re in a bad situation where someone is monitoring their activity, maybe they can only access the internet from public computer terminals. Heck, I’ve never even logged into AO3 on my phone--if I’m away from my computer I just read what’s publicly available. 
I know I have people lurking on my fics. I know my fics probably mean a lot to someone I don’t even know exists. I know this because there are plenty of fics I love whose writers don’t know I exist.
I love my commenters personally; I love my lurkers as an abstract concept. I know they’re there and I wish them well, and if they ever de-lurk I love them all the more.
So up until last year I never considered archive-locking my fic, because I get it. The AI scraping was upsetting, but I still hesitated because I was thinking of lurkers and guests and remembering what it felt like to be 15 and wondering if it’d be worth letting a stranger on the internet know I existed and asking to be added to their friends list just so I could reread a funny post they made once.
But the internet has changed a lot since the 00s, and fandom has changed with it. I’ve read some things and been doing some thinking about fandom-as-community over the last few years, and reading through the lore.fm drama made me decide that it’s time for me to set some boundaries.
I still love my lurkers, and I feel bad about leaving any guest commenters behind, especially if they’re in a situation where they can’t make an account for some reason. But from here on out, even my lurkers are going to have to do the bare minimum to read my fics--make an AO3 account.
Should we gatekeep fandom?
I’ve seen a few people ask this question, usually rhetorically, sometimes as a joke, always with a bit of seriousness. And I think…yeah, maybe we should. Except wait, no, not like that--
A decade ago, when people talked about fandom gatekeeping and why it was bad to do, it intersected with a lot of other things, mainly feminism and classism. The prevalent image of fandom gatekeeping was, like, a man learning that a woman likes Star Wars and haughtily demanding, “Oh, yeah? Well if you’re REALLY a fan, name ten EU novels” to belittle and dismiss her, expecting that a “real fan” would have the money and time to be familiar with the EU, and ignoring the fact that male movie-only fans were still considered fans. The thing being gatekept was the very definition of “being a fan” and people’s right to describe themselves as one.
That’s not what I mean when I say maybe fandom should gatekeep more. Anyone can call themselves a fan if they like something, that’s fine. But when it comes to the ability to enjoy the fanworks produced by the fandom community…that might be something worth gatekeeping.
See, back in the 00s, it was perfectly common for people to just…not go on the internet. Surfing the web was a thing, but it was just, like, a fun pastime. Not everyone did it. It wasn’t until the rise of social media that going online became a thing everyone and their grandmother did every day. Back then, going on the internet was just…a hobby.
So one of the first gates online fandom ever had was the simple fact that the entire world wasn’t here yet.
The entire world is here now. That gate has been demolished.
And it’s a lot easier to find us now. Even scattered across platforms, fandom is so centralized these days. It isn’t a network of dedicated webshrines and forums that you can only find via webrings anymore, it’s right there on all the big social media sites. AO3 didn’t set out to be the main fanfic website, but that’s definitely what it’s become. It’s easy for people to find us--and that includes people who don’t care about the community, and just want “content.”
Transformative fandom doesn’t like it when people see our fanworks as “content”. “Content” is a pretty broad term, but when fandom uses it we’re usually referring to creative works that are churned out by content creators to be consumed by an audience as quickly as possible as often as possible so that the content creator can generate revenue. This not-so-new normal has caused a massive shift in how people who are new to fandom view fanworks--instead of seeing fic or art as something a fellow fan made and shared with you, they see fanworks as products to be consumed.
Transformative fandom has, in general, always been a gift economy. We put time and effort into creating fanworks that we share with our fellow fans for free. We do this so we don’t get sued, but fandom as a whole actually gets a lot out of the gift economy. Offer your community a story, and in return you can get comments, build friendships, or inspire other people to write things that you might want to read. Readers are given the gift of free stories to read and enjoy, and while lurking is fine, they have the choice to engage with the writer and other readers by leaving comments or making reclists to help build the community.
And look, don’t get me wrong. People have never engaged with fanfic as much as fan writers wish they would. There has always been “no one comments anymore” wank. There have always been people who only comment to say “MORE!” or otherwise demand or guilt trip writers into posting the next chapter. But fandom has always agreed that those commenters are rude and annoying, and as those commenters navigate fandom they have the chance to learn proper community etiquette.
However, now it seems that a lot of the people who are consuming fanworks aren’t actually in the community. 
I won’t say “they aren’t real fans” because that’s silly; there’s lots of ways to be a fan. But there seem to be a lot of fans now who have no interest in fandom as a community, or in adhering to community etiquette, or in respecting the gift economy. They consume our fics, but they don’t appreciate fan labor. They want our “content”, but they don’t respect our control over our creations.
And even worse--they see us as a resource. We share our work for free, as a gift, but all they see is an open-source content farm waiting to be tapped into. We shared it for free, so clearly they can do whatever they want with it. Why should we care if they feed our work into AI training datasets, or copy/paste our unfinished stories into ChatGPT to get an ending, or charge people for an unnecessary third-party AO3 app, or sell fanbindings on etsy for a profit without the author’s permission, or turn our stories into poor imitations of podfics to be posted on other platforms without giving us credit or asking our consent, while also using it to lure in people they can datascrape for their Forbes 30 Under 30 company? 
And sure, people have been doing shady things with other people’s fanworks since forever. Art theft and reposting has always been a big problem. Fanfic is harder to flat-out repost, but I’ve heard of unauthorized fic translations getting posted without crediting the original author. Once in…I think the 2010s? I read a post by a woman who had gone to some sort of local bookselling event, only to find that the man selling “his” novel had actually self-published her fanfic. (Wish I could find that one again, I don’t even remember where I read it.)
But aside from that third example, the thing is…as awful as fanart/writing theft is, back in the day, the main thing a thief would gain from it was clout. Clout that should rightfully go to the creators who gifted their work in the first place, yeah, but still. Just clout. People will do a lot of hurtful things for clout, but fandom clout means nothing outside of fandom. Fandom clout is not enough to incentivize the sort of wide-scale pillaging we’re seeing from community outsiders today.
Money, on the other hand… Well, fandom’s just a giant, untapped content farm, isn’t it? Think of how much revenue all that content could generate.
Lurkers are a normal and even beneficial part of any online community. Maybe one day they’ll de-lurk and easily slide into place beside their fellow fans because they already know the etiquette. Maybe they’re active in another community, and they can spread information from the community they lurk in to the community they’re active in. At the very least, they silently observe, and even if they’re not active community members, they understand the community.
Fans who see fanworks as “content” don’t belong in the same category as lurkers. They’re tourists. 
While reading through the initial Reddit thread on the lore.fm situation, I found this comment:
Tumblr media
[ID: Reddit User Cabbitowo says: ... So in anime fandoms we have a word called tourist and essentially it means a fan of a few anime and doesn't care about anime tropes and actively criticizes them. This is kind of how fandoms on tiktok feel. They're touring fanfics and fanart and actively criticizes tropes that have been in the fandom since the 60s. They want to be in a fandom but they don't want to engage in fandom 
OP totallymandy responds: Just entered back into Reddit after a long day to see this most recent reply. And as a fellow anime fan this making me laugh so much since it’s true! But it sorta hurts too when the reality sets in. Modern fandom is so entitled and bratty and you’d think it’s the minors only but that’s not even true, my age-mates and older seem to be like that. They want to eat their cake and complain all whilst bringing nothing to the potluck… :/ END ID]
-
“Tourist” is an apt name for this sort of fan. They don’t want to be part of our community, and they don’t have to be in order to come into our spaces and consume our work. Even if they don’t steal our work themselves, they feel so entitled to it that they’re fine with ignoring our wishes and letting other people take it to make AI “podfics” for them to listen to (there are a lot of comments on lore.fm’s shutdown announcement video from people telling them to just ignore the writers and do it anyway). They’ll use AI to generate an ending to an unfinished fic because they don’t care about seeing “the ending this writer would have given to the story they were telling”, they just want “an ending”. For these tourist fans, the ends justify the means, and their end goal is content for them to consume, with no care for the community that created it for them in the first place.
I don’t think this is confined to a specific age group. This isn’t “13-year-olds on Wattpad” or “Zoomers on TikTok” or whatever pointless generation war we’re in now. This is coming from people who are new to fandom, whose main experience with creative works on the internet is this new content culture and who don’t understand fandom as a community. That description can be true of someone from any age group.
It’s so easy to find fandom these days. It is, in fact, too easy. Newcomers face no hurdles or challenges that would encourage them to lurk and observe a bit before engaging, and it’s easy for people who would otherwise move on and leave us alone to start making trouble. From tourist fans to content entrepreneurs to random people who just want to gawk, it’s so easy for people who don’t care about the fandom community to reap all of its fruits. 
So when I say maybe fandom should start gatekeeping a bit, I’m referring to the fact that we barely even have a gate anymore. Everyone is on the internet now; the entire world can find us, and they don’t need to bother learning community etiquette when they do. Before, we were protected by the fact that fandom was considered weird and most people didn’t look at it twice. Now, fandom is pretty mainstream. People who never would’ve bothered with it before are now comfortable strolling in like they own the place. They have no regard for the fandom community, they don’t understand it, and they don’t want to. They want to treat it just like the rest of the content they consume online.
And then they’re surprised when those of us who understand fandom culture get upset. Fanworks have existed far longer than the algorithmic internet’s content. Fanworks existed long before the internet. We’ve lived like this for ages and we like it.
So if someone can’t be bothered to respect fandom as a community, I don’t see why I should give them easy access to my fics.
Think of it like a garden gate
When I interact with commenters on my fic, I have this sense of hospitality.
The comment section is my front porch. The fic is my garden. I created my garden because I really wanted to, and I’m proud of it, and I’m happy to share it with other people. 
Lots of people enjoy looking at my garden. Many walk through without saying anything. Some stop to leave kudos. Some recommend my garden to their friends. And some people take the time to stop by my front porch and let me know what a beautiful garden it is and how much they’ve enjoyed it. 
Any fic writer can tell you that getting comments is an incredible feeling. I always try to answer all my comments. I don’t always manage it, but my fics’ comment sections are the one place that I manage to consistently socialize in fandom. When I respond to a comment, it feels like I’m pouring out a glass of lemonade to share with this lovely commenter on my front porch, a thank you for their thank you. We take a moment to admire my garden together, and then I see them out. The next time they drop by, I recognize them and am happy to pour another glass of lemonade.
My garden has always been open and easy to access. No fences, no walls. You just have to know where to find it. Fandom in general was once protected by its own obscurity, an out-of-the-way town that showed up on maps but was usually ignored.
But now there’s a highway that makes it easy to get to, and we have all these out-of-towner tourists coming in to gawk and steal our lawn ornaments and wonder if they can use the place to make themselves some money.
I don’t care to have those types trampling over my garden and eating all my vegetables and digging up my flowers to repot and sell, so I’ve put up a wall. It has a gate that visitors can get through if they just take the time to open it.
Admittedly, it’s a small obstacle. But when I share my fics, I share them as a gift with my fellow fans, the ones who understand that fandom is a community, even if they’re lurkers. As for tourist fans and entrepreneurs who see fic as content, who have no qualms ignoring the writer’s wishes, who refuse to respect or understand the fandom community…well, they’re not the people I mean to share my fic with, so I have no issues locking them out. If they want access to my stories, they’ll have to do the bare minimum to become a community member and join the AO3 invite queue.
And y’know, I’ve said a lot about fandom and community here, and I just want to say, I hope it’s not intimidating. When I was younger, talk about The Fandom Community made me feel insecure, and I didn’t think I’d ever manage to be active enough in fandom spaces to be counted as A Member Of The Community. But you don’t have to be a social butterfly to participate in fandom. I’ll always and forever be a chronic lurker, I reblog more than I post, I rarely manage to comment on fic, and I go radio silent for months at a time--but I write and post fanfiction. That’s my contribution.
Do you write, draw, vid, gif, or otherwise create? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you leave comments? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you curate reclists? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you maintain a fandom blog or fuckyeah blog? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you provide a space for other fans to convene in? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you regularly send asks (off anon so people know who you are)? Congrats, you're a community member.
Do you have fandom friends who you interact with? Congrats, you're a community member.
There’s lots of ways to be a fan. Just make sure to respect and appreciate your fellow fans and the work they put in for you to enjoy and the gift economy fandom culture that keeps this community going.
6K notes · View notes
ashstfu · 27 days
Text
how i keep my screen time under an hour a day —
i have been getting a lot of messages asking how i manage to keep my screen time to just 54 minutes a day. honestly it wasn’t some overnight miracle, it’s been a conscious effort to shift my focus from the digital world to the beauty of real life. i’ve found that the more i immerse myself in the world around me, the less i feel the need to be glued to my evil phone.
no instagram or tiktok
believe it or not, i’ve been off instagram for five years now and i’ve never ever had a tiktok account. i know that sounds crazy but staying far far away from those apps has been one of the best decisions i’ve made. when i realized that the real world is so much more fulfilling than anything on a screen, something just clicked. why spend time scrolling through someone else’s life when i could be out there truly living mine?
prioritize what really matters
i’m a firm believer in prioritizing things that add value to my life. i use my phone for work, to stay in touch with loved ones and yes, for tumblr and interacting with my beautiful mutuals. but beyond that?? i ask myself “does this add to my life or take away from it?” if it’s the latter, it’s not worth my time.
create a morning & evening ritual
starting and ending my day without my phone has been a game changer for me. in the morning, i let natural light wake me up, stretch, have my coffee, workout and ease into the day without the noise of notifications. at night, i wind down with a book, a movie, or just music & my thoughts.
set boundaries
i’m strict with myself about when and where i use my phone. no screens during meals, no scrolling when i’m with friends or family and definitely no phone after midnight.
embrace real life connections
the connections i make in real life are so much richer than any DM or comment sorry. i focus on cultivating these relationships, spending time with people i love & experiencing things together. it’s fulfilling in a way that no app on my phone can replicate.
find joy in the little things
instead of reaching for my phone out of habit, i’ve learned to find joy in the little things. like the sound of the ocean, the smell of coffee or just sitting in silence. it’s amazing how much more present and content i feel when i’m not constantly looking for the next distraction. in the end, it’s about choosing to engage with the world around me and i honestly wouldn’t have it any other way.
2K notes · View notes
theworldgate · 2 years
Text
I have to explain what is going on in the UK, because it is absurd.
So, this is Gary Lineker:
Tumblr media
He's known for a fair few things over here. He was a very good (association) footballer, playing for England in the 1986 and 1990 World Cups, winning the Golden Boot in 1986, and managing to never get a single yellow card in his playing career. He played for Leicester City, Everton, Barcelona, and Tottenham, before finishing his career in Japan. But if you aren't in your mid 30s, you probably know actually know him him for a couple of other things. The first is the role of spokesman for another Leicester icon, Walkers Crisps (which are sort of equivalent to Lays, but hit different), as pictured above. Despite being a notably clean player, he used to play a cheeky serial crisp thief. I don't think he's done that for well over a decade, but his ads were on the telly a lot when I was a kid and it's a bit like learning that the hamburglar was an incredibly clean (American) football player or something.
The second thing Gary is widely known for is having presented Match of the Day, the big football program on the BBC, the sort-of state broadcaster, since 1999. He is, incidentally, very well paid for this (though with a consensus that he could get even more if he went to one of the non-free-to-view broadcasters because he is very good at the job). He also has a twitter account. And political opinions. So, the UK government has got itself dead set upon doing heinous stuff that will totally somehow work to prevent people who want to come to the UK making the perilous crossing of the Channel (between England and France). By heinous, I mean "openly advertise that they won't attempt to protect victims of modern slavery" stuff. It's very obviously using a legal hammer to victimise a marginalised group of people in order to win votes. And, uh, I should clarify that by "legal" I mean "using the passage of laws" - the policy is, in addition to all the other ways it's awful, probably incompatible with the Human Rights Act and the UK's international law obligations. Gary, top lad that he is, objected to this. On Tuesday 7th March, he made a quote Tweet of a video of the Home Secretary, Suella Braverman, bigging up the policy, he wrote "Good heavens, this is beyond awful.". This got a bunch of backlash from extremely right-wingers, and then he made the tweet that really got him in trouble (with right-wingers): "There is no huge influx. We take far fewer refugees than other major European countries. This is just an immeasurably cruel policy directed at the most vulnerable people in language that is not dissimilar to that used by Germany in the 30s, and I’m out of order?".
Now, I am not actually subjecting myself to watching a video of Suella Braverman bigging up a cruel policy to say whether the specific comparison of the language to 1930s Germany is accurate. But needless to say, Ms Braverman was amongst the many figures on the right of UK politics objecting to Gary's rhetoric. And here's the part where a fact about the BBC comes in: it is nominally neutral and impartial (and so, of course, is routinely accused of bias from all sides but particularly the right-wing), and has something of a code for its contributors to this effect. Now, that code has previously been applied to Gary Lineker, over a comment about whether governing Conservative Party would hand back donations from figures linked to the Russian regime. But it generally hasn't been applied too strongly to people like Gary, whose roles have nothing to do with politics (such as presenting a "here's what happened on the footie today" show), on the basis that, well, their roles have nothing to do with politics. However, when directly asked about whether the BBC should punish Gary Lineker for his tweets, government figures basically went "well, that's a them problem". But a couple of days passed, and it seemed like Gary's approach of "standing his ground because he did nothing wrong" was working and everything would die down. He was set to get 'a talking to' but not much more than that. The Conservative right, after all their fire and fury earlier, had gotten bored and moved onto something else. And then, on Friday 10th March, the BBC announced that he would be suspended from hosting Match of the Day this weekend. But it could still go ahead, because there are, like, other hosts! Except, well, funnily enough, when you take a beloved figure off air, for making a fairly anodyne tweet, no one wants to be the scab who actually takes up the role of replacing him. Gary's two co-hosts, Alan Shearer and Ian Wright, said that they would not appear without him. People who (co-)host Match of the Day on other days followed suit. The net result is that Match of the Day is currently set to air without hosts, BBC commentary, or global feed commentary. And the solidarity shown to Gary Lineker, over what is very flagrantly actual cancel culture and an attack on freedom of speech (the logic implied is that institutional impartiality requires that no one say anything too critical of the government ever), has continued to grow. The BBC has pretty much been unable to run pretty much any live sports content today, and has resorted to raiding the BBC Sounds archive to fill the sports radio channel. And, as of 17:30 on Saturday 11th March, the situation shows no signs of improvement, though some are calling for the Chairman Richard Sharp, who is separately facing corruption allegations, to resign (yes I linked to the BBC itself there, there is nothing, nothing, the BBC loves more than going into great detail about how much the BBC sucks).
16K notes · View notes