#I do love them I just don't get their reasons sometimes

[ms-demeanor]

I tend to bring out that example not to describe why chiropractic is bad (there's plenty of evidence that chiropractic is bad that doesn't need me involved) but to demonstrate that I understand the appeal of CAM and why people go for it and to show that I'm aware that people who get sucked in by these scammers aren't stupid, they're desperate - like I was. (In telling that story I've often made the point that I *knew* chiropractic was dangerous and ineffective but I went *anyway* because I literally could not stand up but I had to figure out how to work; being in that much pain made me vulnerable to an industry that I knew was predatory because I needed *any* kind of intervention I could get my hands on).

You see, I'm aware that I can come off a bit harsh on this subject and I want people who have been scammed by alt med practitioners to know that I don't think less of them for having been victimized by medical charlatans. It's an unfortunate fact that people who have been conned have a lot of trouble getting away from the con when they think they're going to be laughed at or made fun of for getting fooled. I don't think less of them, I think that they were targeted by a predatory industry and that makes me loathe the industry.

I am not laughing at those people. I know that a lot of them have been badly harmed by CAM, or love people who were badly harmed by CAM, and the real shitter of the situation is that a lot of them, like me, may have had no other option when they found themselves suddenly totally disabled by an injury and needing to work.

I bit my tongue about it when you claimed that you hadn't seen any studies about acupuncture that paid attention to meridians and how they made a difference in the results, which just tells me that you've never actually read anything about research in that field or you if you did, you didn't understand it; it is an oft-discussed problem of studying the effects of acupuncture that "real acupuncture" (done by trained acupuncturists who use meridians) and sham acupuncture (which sometimes penetrates the skin but not along meridians, sometimes penetrates the skin at meridians but only shallowly, and which sometimes does not use needles to penetrate the skin at all) produce the same patient outcomes in probably about half of the published literature in the field. You literally cannot do a single search on the subject without this coming up. This is catastrophic in the research because acupuncturists keep saying that sham isn't a valid control because sham acupuncture provides benefits beyond placebo. Literally the people arguing for the efficacy of the intervention say that faking it provides results so far above "nothing" that it throws off the research. It is ubiquitous in the field. The other problem that gets discussed all the time with this is that acupuncturists don't agree on where the acupuncture points are. So are the specific points important or are they not? Is the depth important or is it not? Are the meridians important or are they not? If acupuncturists are saying that shallow penetration on non-point, non-meridian locations can't be an effective placebo because it provides benefits similar to the intervention then it sounds like the meridians and points don't matter much.

And I mean hey, I did think about that.

Kind of like how i've thought about it several times over the years when you've called me short-sighted and hypocritical in the notes of my own posts.

I haven't brought it up quite this visibly because I know people can be assholes to someone when I'm being an asshole to them on tumblr (I am asking people: please don't go looking - I censored the name and deleted the comment for a reason, I am perfectly capable of doing my own yelling and when people get harassed because I want to argue with some stupid bullshit they said it makes me want to talk LESS about this kind of stuff, not more)

So feel free to unfollow because i'm being "my way or the highway" about SCAMMING SICK PEOPLE OUT OF THEIR MONEY, but if you choose to keep commenting things like this on my posts be aware that I'm tired of being quiet about how *you specifically* are wrong while you're calling me a hypocrite.

Also humans are bilaterally symmetrical with nerves and blood vessels running up and down our entire goddamned bodies; you could drop a water balloon full of paint on our heads and follow the streaks and several would be parallel with major blood vessels and nerves out of pure chance. Many of our blood vessels that are paralleled by meridians are *visible through the skin* of people with lighter skin tones.

*eta: also - you have never linked a single study when talking about these things so it's kind of rich that "IDK but my acupuncturist treated what my doctor couldn't" is a sound argument when "a chiropractor broke my spine because she didn't perform imaging and didn't identify the bone tumor that was weakening the area prior to adjusting it" isn't AND you also are saying that I say *your* studies are invalid because of a bad experience but you don't have studies you have "but have you ever looked at the lines?"

I mean, again, I guess I can't be surprised that you're not linking studies when you are not aware of the fundamental problem of acupuncture research that is acknowledged by acupuncturists and skeptics alike, but for fuck's sake it's so fucking frustrating that dipshits will glibly call you a hypocrite who believes in anecdata if you make an attempt to insert empathy into these discussions via shared experience and will call you an insensitive, unimaginative robot incapable of understanding the different experiences that different individuals have if you say "i'm glad that you're feeling better but there's not enough evidence that the intervention is worth the risks" - heads i win, tails you, lose you, disingenuous fucks.

Just say you don't care. Say it doesn't matter. Say you didn't read the research and it doesn't matter to you because you're happy with what helped you and you don't care about the people who end up with collapsed lungs or blood borne infections or untreated pain or arterial bleeds. You got yours, fuck everyone else if it didn't work for them, maybe they should try yoga.

When you say you're anti-CAM what does that mean? Like what does CAM mean in that context? I genuinely haven't seen that acronym before and I'm assuming you aren't anti-camming as in like the form of sex work

Complimentary and Alternative Medicine.

I am capable of turning off my inner annoying atheist, I am incapable of turning off my inner annoying quackwatcher.

I have had real life fights with people I genuinely love about this and I do not regret it. I will absolutely not regret shitting all over someone's $500 herbalist certification.

[reallyromealone]

Title: autographs

Fandom: DC

Characters: wonder woman, batfam

Fic type: fluff

Pairings: Bruce x reader

Warnings: male reader, reader insert, ftm reader, fluff, sexual themes between Bruce and reader(mentions of sexual things like slick and such)(they get interrupted by the children and reader simps for his husband), the bat kids are kids, happy family, reader is a stay at home dad

Notes:

Summary:reader works hard to care for his big family and Bruce decides to swallow his pride and get his husband and son an autograph of a hero the two love

🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

Bruce sighed while holding two photos of wonder woman for said woman to sign.

The things he did for the ones he loved.

His husband and second eldest loved her, watching her fights on the tv and Bruce knew they were too shy to ask him to get autographs but he was willing to do this for them... Their faces would be worth it.

Finding her was easy, the woman towering over her peers with Amazonian height "wonder Woman, I need to speak with you for a moment" Bruce spoke seriously and Diana raised an eyebrow but followed him into another room of the watchtower "what's the matter, batman?" She asked seriously and Bruce sighed "I have a request..." He pulled out the photos "my husband and son are quite the fans of you and are too nervous to meet you themselves..."

"They want autographs?" She said with a soft smile "yes, they look up to you quite a bit"

"If you ever want, I could always make an appearance for them" she signed the pictures and handed them to him "I think Jason would lose his mind at that"

"And (name)?"

"Would explode"

"Well I guess I should make a trip to Gotham sometime"

"Perhaps you should"

(Name) Was helping Alfred with chores, handling the laundry while having his children help via making it a game "gogo! Throw it as fast as you can!" The fastest kid to throw their laundry in the machine got two packets of gummy Candy's instead of one! Little baby Damien strapped to his chest while Tim and Duke tried to put their combined laundry together while Jason and Dick cheered them on, as the older ones they knew they could reasonably get a snack whenever but the littles didn't have that freedom get because they would have another juice incident.

The girls were out with (name)s mother for the day, having some girl time without the boys and all the chaos that came with them.

Frankly (name) was happy that his mom was willing to take a role like that on, offering the girls a female role model of realistic expectations was critical at such a young age.

"Woooo! You guys did great!" The boys cheered, happy they 'won' but actually just helped do chores "now why don't you follow your brothers for a snack?" He ushered the boys out and they cheered at the extra snack and (name) Pat the elder twos heads while Damien whined "yeah yeah, it's naptime buddy..." (Name) Unhooked him and brought him up to his nursery, kissing his little head "you get good sleep and dream good stuff for me, alright?" The babe babbled and (name) began mumbling a lullaby, gently rocking the crib.

Eventually Damian fell asleep and (name) went to go check on his hellions he lovingly called children and smiled when he saw them playing video games, the littles on auto mode as they haven't quite figured out how to properly play video games but still be included. He loved that his kids got along so well-- well most of the time.

Deciding to take a minute, he slinked down into the cave for a needed moment alone without his little ones making demands, Alfred keeping an ear for them and with a baby monitor he decided to take a nap on the small seating area in the corner while he waited for Bruce to return. Taking care of eight children was no easy feat but him and Bruce made it work, it being the weekend the whole family was home, typically it was school and preschool, little Damien and Cass with a nanny while (name) helped Alfred or was out with Bruce doing public things.

(Name) Woke to the sound of the engine of the batmobile, lifting his body to see Bruce step up in full suit and made no attempts in hiding his blatantly roaming eyes "you see something you like?" Bruce teased taking off his cowl and (name) hummed "you have no idea..." The man was ready to climb the dark knight like a tree and do things most unholy.

"Well hold onto that, I have something for you" Bruce teased and pulled out a rolled picture and handed it to (name) gently unrolled it "no fucking way..." (Name) Whispered before looking at him "babe... You got her autograph?!" He jumped up and Bruce chuckled "she was more than happy to sigh for you and Jason" holding out the other picture (name) had a love sick smile on his face "oh he's gonna lose his mind, you're a good dad" (name) pulled Bruce close by his hips and kissed him gently "I try what I can..." Bruce mumbled and resumed kissing him, always a sucker for his husband's lips.

Jason was getting ready for bed when he saw the photo on his bed, immediately clutching the picture to see it's authenticity and hopped out of bed and ran down to his parents room and knocked on the door "papa? Dad?"

(Name) Froze his actions when he heard his son and looked at Bruce "sorry, baby" he whispered and they immediately put pants on, (name) wiping his thighs and cringing at the slick between his legs... "Eugh" he grumbled and pulled on Bruce's shirt before going and opening the door "what's up jaybird?" He asked his second eldest and let him in "look!" Jason showed the autograph "your dad got you that, why don't you go thank him?" (Name) Gestured to Bruce who smiled at his kid, Jason immediately running and hugging him "thank you! Thank you!" Bruce hugged him tight, kissing the top of his head aggressively and making the boy laugh "oh no! My son fell into the dad hug trap! He will never escape!" (Name) Teased quietly and Jason laughed and gave non committal plea for freedom and Bruce let him go but not without another kiss to the forehead.

"Now go back to bed, Birdy" (name) said to his son "you can show your brothers tomorrow, yeah?"

"Ok! Love you guys!"

"Love you too baby"

(Name) Waited till he couldn't hear the footsteps and immediately turned to look at Bruce "you're a good dad" he walked over and got situated in Bruce's lap, Bruce admiring his handsome husband who gently cupped his jawline "and you're a good husband for putting up with me"

"Someone's gotta make sure you take naps and eat" he teased the man who grumbled "and I gotta make sure you don't wear your binder too long" Bruce teased back and pinched (name)s butt cheek "yeah yeah!" He teased, the two grinning and kissing each other "now where were we?"

"now I kind of just wanna cuddle...."

".... What movie then"

"the princess Bride :)"

[i-am-a-bad-influence-writes]

The little things

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Masterlist

My headcanons about the Lads boys. I will keep updating this if I find things to add. Suggestions are welcome! Last update: 27-01-2025

Ever so slightly nsfw, so don't read if ur under 18.

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Zayne

Secretly tracks your period and changes your diet with your cycle to make sure you suffer as little as possible. (But does let you indulge in chocolate on your period even though it might worsen the cramps.)

Does not care for your pranks but appreciates you feeling comfortable enough to prank him.

Enjoys foreplay almost more than the actual act. He likes to watch you climb onto his lap, likes feeling you touch any part of uncovered skin, likes kissing you until you can't breathe anymore.

Has extras of almost all the products you use stashed. This includes shower gel, makeup, perfume, and sometimes snacks but those run out quite quickly.

Reads a lot of romance books in his free time.

Really, really, really likes your hands. Will spend hours studying your fingers, massaging your palm, kissing your knuckles. Never gets bored of it.

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Xavier

Pretends to take cover when he sees you almost sneezing.

Likes doing your laundry. To him, it is a very small way to show you he cares. Leaves everything folded and sorted in piles of shirts, dresses, pants, etc, on your bed for you to put away. (Every once in a while a pair of panties will go missing though.)

Will try to absolutely smother himself between your thighs. Has asked you to squeeze his head like a watermelon on more than one occasion.

Favorite sleeping position is on top of you while you're reading on the couch with his head on your chest and your hand scratching his head.

Is actually a pretty ok cook. He just like watching you cook so sometimes he burns things on purpose. Just to convince you to cook for him. (How else would he have survived for so long?)

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Rafayel

Takes note of your morning ritual and "secretly" helps you when you have a bad morning by handing you your toothbrush, having your breakfast ready for you, or getting you a glass of water before you can even think about taking your meds.

Likes to paint your back when you lay naked on the bed. Sometimes it's something truly impressive, other times he does silly doodles.

Sometimes accidentally gets annoyed for real when he pretends to because he gets into it too much.

Is a munch. Like, you cannot get him to stop until he's had his fill. Besides your safeword, there is absolutely no way to keep him from ravishing you.

Is completely enamored with lipstick kisses. Loves the way they look on his skin and even more on yours. Has put on lipstick for that reason more than once. Sometimes takes pictures of his work after with your consent and has used them as references for paintings.

Will take any chance given to him to stare at your boobs or touch your boobs. At this point, you can't really care anymore. It's just part of your day.

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Sylus

Likes working out, but likes it even more if you're watching. You don't have to join. It just boosts his confidence to see you salivating over him while pretending to be busy on your phone.

Adores having you on top in any situation. Sitting on his lap, cuddling, sex. He just enjoys watching you on top of him.

Is secretly a great mixologist and absolutely loves making drinks for you. Will make syrups and juices from scratch. Bonus points if you don't drink alcohol because now he has a new way to impress you. (Cause most alcohol free "liquors" are absolutely shit.)

Absolutely loves marking you in places no one can see when you're wearing clothes. He likes the privacy and possessive nature of it. Knowing that you are completely his while no one else knows.

Makes sure you are holding him properly when riding on the back of his motorcycle. Enjoys it when you let your hands roam over his body while he drives.

Has been taking note of your opinions on his clothes, his furniture, the food he makes, and makes changes to assure your comfort without making you feel like you're asking too much of him.

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Caleb

Absolutely despises milk. Isn't lactose intolerant, just does not like it at all.

Told you he can't always wear his chain because of certain missions but in reality the chain sometimes itches and he just needs a break. Will wear it while he sleeps though.

Power bottom.

Will never agree with you on where to eat. Does always end up taking you to a place you will like.

Has a weird obsession with your shoulders. Tries to always be touching them. Either by putting his head on your shoulder, his arm around you, kissing them. Whatever he has to do to get close to your shoulders.

Cringes at his own words very often and secretly wishes he could be as carefree with you as he was before the accident.

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[rain-soaked-sun]

To hold him close

Cw: Sunday x reader fluff, religious imagery,thoughts of self doubt, hurt/comfort . Their bedroom has a private dressing you off the side, connecting to their bathroom WK 650 Gn , please let me know if I mention gender!

⊹︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶ ୨♡୧ ︶︶︶ ⊹ ︶︶︶⊹

Sunday often wonders how someone as pure as you can stand or even love a sinner such as him

It will continue to boggle him for the rest of his days. He will never understand your patience for him. He can't see you all the time because of his work, his odd habits make it hard for even the most understanding people to take. He can be snappy at you for no reason ,and yet, you love him all the same

He sees himself as an undeserving devotee in your presence, constantly gifted by his god, you. Vying for your continued love and praise as undeserving it is, doing all he can to make you never leave , to reassure you that your love isn't misplaced. Perhaps it stems from his upbringing that he had to work hard to earn your approval and love. Though,you would give it out to him for free

It's not like you would ever leave, you don't understand his feeling that he doesn't deserve love like anyone else. You treasure him more than the stars in the sky,and sometimes he understands that , one day he will never question your loyalty again but for now you will remind him as much as you have to

“My dove? Are you in your dressing room?” Sunday called from your bedroom. You chirped a response before he entered .

“Ah,there you are “, he leaned over you slightly, his hands resting on your shoulders, idly rubbing circles into them. He stared at the reflection of you two in the vanity bathroom briefly before pressing his head into the crook of neck and pressed featherlight kisses down to your shoulder

You recognized his patterns by now, you recognized the stiff rigid twitches of his wings. you could see the fatigue lying behind his smile, the circles under his eyes . You worried for him as any lover would and made up your mind to take care of him. Even for the night it would do him good to relax

“Sunday?” You said softly, a soothing hand running through his hair,”Hm? What is it?” His face still buried in your neck.

“When was the last time you got to truly relax, you seem so tired. I worry for you, you know this. Don't you?”You felt a faint smile against your skin,”Don't fret over me, I'm fine I promise you. It's just a little extra work-” he looked up from your neck and could see your face, he hated that expression, it seems he could never lie to you. He huffed lightly,his shoulders sagging ,”It will be done soon , please don't look so upset , it hurts my heart. What can I do?”

“It's not what you can do for me Sunday. You give too much to everyone else and have nothing left for yourself , you work yourself till you're dead tired , like now.” You looked directly at him now, he felt seen under your gaze, how could you read him so well he always wondered. “Let me take care of you, please?”

“That's not necessary-” You silenced him with a kiss. He melted into your lips and he knew you had won , he would fall into your embrace for tonight and go work again tomorrow , he assured himself You pulled back with a satisfied smile ,”Come , first you will change into something comfortable, and then we will relax in bed for the rest of the night, perhaps have a maid bring us some food?” You said fondly , getting up from the vanity chair and led him out of the small dressing room into the main suite

“Whatever you say my dear I will do . You ask for the maid and tell her I would like some filled puffs and whatever you want, and I will change . Is that alright? " He said with a lazy smile, affection lining every word .

“That would be perfect”

[queer-cosette]

Actually, of the three I listed, The Creature is the only love interest who takes his lady's actual wants into account.

Jareth isn't a good guy either! He kidnaps Sarah's toddler half-brother and intends to turn him into a goblin! His response to Sarah begging him that she didn't actually want him to take Toby is to give her thirteen hours to solve his labyrinth, and then when she takes him up on it, he pulls every trick in the book to slow her process, up to having one of the allies she meets in the labyrinth betray her and give her a cursed fruit that traps her in an illusion the second she bites into it.

The keyword is FANTASY.

Heathers and Labyrinth are specifically about how relying too much on your fantasy can and will go horribly wrong. Heathers ends a little more on a grimdark note than Labyrinth - the message of which is it's okay to have your fantasies as long as you don't let them take over your life or interfere with reality - but what I meant by the original post is, one of the reasons JD and Jareth are such attractive fantasies to audiences is because having your love interest take your negative emotions seriously - not just your excitement or your love or your passions, although those are all important too, but your rage and your sadness and your trauma - is an important trait that rarely gets acknowledged so directly in fiction.

(Lisa Frankenstein is the odd one out, but it's not about a girl struggling with selfishness or moral greyness having it come to a head by falling for a villain, it's about a former slasher victim healing her trauma by becoming the slasher villain with help from a hot dead guy who would do anything to make her happy. Are they good people? No. Are they fun to think about? Extremely!)

The reason I didn't include a massive analysis on why "JD is bad, actually" is it wasn't my point and sometimes I like to post my thoughts about movies without a massive disclaimer about needing to remember that it's not okay to date a guy who'll kill your bullies in real life, actually, cause he might gaslight you and also murder is bad. I am aware of that and I like to assume my audience is also aware of that. Maybe I was little clumsy in my language, but sometimes you have to give up pinpoint accuracy to one point in order to cover all three.

Sorry if I come off bitchy, but I am very tired of people assuming that because I find JD to be appealing, I want a love interest in real life who is just like him in every way. I left the Heathers fandom in 2018 because of how frequently this assumption occurred.

I didn't say he was good or that his relationship with Veronica was ideal, I said he was appealing and that the dynamic is fun to think about.

It's a fantasy.

I think the appeal of the male protagonists in things like Heathers and Labyrinth and Lisa Frankenstein is partly because... they take the female characters' emotions seriously. Like I'm not saying that they always make the best decisions about helping, but they take their girls seriously. Veronica is stuck with her image as a vapid party girl when she's slowly beginning to deeply loathe herself and those surrounding her; Sarah has her privacy dismissed by her stepmother simply because she's older than her toddler half-brother and shouldn't want to be selfish for once; Lisa is expected to just stop grieving the deeply traumatic loss of her mother because it's time for her to start playing happy families as a normal sister and daughter. And JD and Jareth and the Creature all listen. JD encourages Veronica to break free from what's expected of her and stands with her when no one else will. Jareth appears and offers to fulfill Sarah's unrealistic fantasies with magic. The Creature devotedly listens to every word Lisa says and protects her from anyone who has hurt her. Yeah, JD kills three people and has Veronica forge fake suicide notes to cover it up, and Jareth kidnaps Toby with the intention of turning him into a goblin, and the Creature goes straight to murder as his method of protection (in particular using methods that might even retraumatise Lisa), but that's all for plot reasons. There wouldn't be a story if there was no conflict. The fantasy is found in the way they listen when no one else will, and how the female protagonists have their negative emotions taken seriously when everyone else dismisses them.

[cushfuddled]

"Sometimes you can just tell when an mlm fic was written by a woman though"

I say this with love. I really do.

You can't.

Some gay men enjoy reading and writing wildly unrealistic kinky sex. Some gay men enjoy reading and writing "stereotypical" depictions of gay men. Some gay men will write fiction which offends other gay men.

No matter how obvious it may seem to you that someone is writing from outside their demographic, you will never know unless the writer tells you so—and you are not entitled to that information.

PLEASE understand that terfs depend on this line of thinking to disguise their harassment campaigns as activism (see #1) and to shame their precious impressionable young women out of interacting with gay fiction and ~suddenly deciding they're men~ (see #2).

Terfs desperately want you to believe you can "just tell" when "a cis straight woman wrote this" because

It discourages cross-contamination. Terfs don't like it when anybody can make gay art without disclosing their identity for the same reason they don't like the word "queer"; they need everybody to stay in their neat, labeled boxes so they know who to target.

It's much easier to convince someone who honestly believes they can tell when "a straight woman wrote this" to share a callout post over so-and-so's "blatant fetishization of gay men." A recent example: Last year the author of Webtoon's Boyfriends suffered a nuclear harassment campaign for the crime of fetishizing gay men...and was diligently misgendered as "she" when he told everyone he was gay and transmasc! People were SO convinced they'd smelled a cis straight woman they refused to acknowledge the creator's actual queer identity, electing to kickflip straight into the transphobia jet turbine rather than (god forbid) admit they weren't a perfect queer sonar device 🎉! These tactics sound convoluted until you look at the end result of the "you can tell [insert identity here] wrote this" callouts and HUH—like clockwork, a marginalized person is pressured into coming out as [insert identity here], they get the shit kicked out of them anyway, and they're forced to limit their interactions with their community online (or even give up creating altogether). How convenient for the terfs! Gay fiction helps a lot of people realize they're trans, but terfs think reading and writing gay fanfiction deludes women into betraying their lesbian comrades and "cosplaying as men." Terfs share a special hatred for this fiction because they see it as a weapon which turns their own kind against them—and they're happy to feign progressivism as a means to an end. Please recognize the signs and don't let exclusionists convince you to do their work for them.

[artfightdramaconfessions]

I'm autistic and I have a really hard time expressing my feelings sometimes. I always say "thank you" to everyone who makes art for me and always try to add at least something about what I like about the piece. "I like how you shaded this piece!", "I love the way you drew her eyes!", "It looks really cool how you styled him!" etc. so it doesn't come off as just a generic copy/pasted "thanks I guess" because I do genuinely like these pieces.

But growing up I would always get shat on by my family for being "ungrateful" because I'd open up bday/Christmas presents and then basically react the same way. "Oh wow! This is that book I wanted! Thanks so much!" But because I wasn't jumping up and down, screaming and crying so hard I threw up because I was so happy and grateful to have this gift, I'd get labeled as "ungrateful". And because of that experience, even with me making that addition, I can't help but feel like people are reading it the same way sometimes. ;v;

But as I've gotten older, I've learned to ignore those feelings more. Sure, there are going to be assholes every now and then who are going to think I'm being "ungrateful" for not writing a 10-page essay on how much I love the art they made, but if they're going to get that upset at a simple "thank you", then that's their problem to deal with. I don't join Art Fight to seek validation from others and I shouldn't expect others in general to have joined for that reason either. As long as I am saying "thank you" and acknowledging the time and effort those artists put into drawing my characters, I think that should be good enough! After all, there's hundreds of thousands of characters on Art Fight, and they chose mine out of them all; that's pretty cool that I was able to inspire them like that!

But I guess in the end what I'm trying to say is to not get discouraged or feel like you're being ungrateful for not writing 10,000 word essays on how much you love the art you've gotten; a simple "thank you" is good enough and anyone who says otherwise is being a dick. And for the people who are getting upset that they "only" got a simple "thank you" and nothing more, consider that they struggle with expressing themselves like me? They might be mentally freaking out about how cool your piece was, but they don't know how to express that to you. Not getting 12 paragraphs of them gushing about the piece doesn't mean that they hate it or dislike it either.

(please keep me on anon)

.

[canonizzyhours]

i'm so glad this blog is back! so as one of our fandom's few, proud canon-flavor blackhands shippers (there are dozens of us! well, maybe one dozen. if i'm lucky) i want to celebrate by venting about something that bugs me in fic about the edizzy relationship.

in fic with sympathetic takes on izzy (and not just canyon ones, i see it pretty frequently from even anti-canyon people who are trying hard to be fair to the character) authors will have izzy, in the throes of unrequited love, thinking about all the good times he and ed used to have together pre-stede, how they used to laugh and have so much fun together. i understand where this is coming from but it is completely losing the core dynamic of the relationship! the key thing about edizzy, the thing that defines their dynamic and that makes the relationship so compelling, is that they both deeply (albeit in fucked up ways) love each other but despite that at the same time THEY DO NOT LIKE EACH OTHER, not even a little bit, and they never have.

you'll see canyon meta sometimes try to establish otherwise, but it's always sort of goofy like a lot of canyon arguments, usually the evidence will be, like, an isolated screencap where con smiles for a brief moment while ed does something in the foreground (often if you actually watch the scene it turns out he's reacting to something unrelated). or people will say ed trying to show izzy all stede's stuff must show that izzy used to respond positively to that sort of thing, instead of what's obviously going on in the scene which is that ed is desperately lonely and doesn't have anyone to talk to EXCEPT izzy.

but look at what we know about them. the parts of ed's personality that show the most when he's actually having a good time are the parts of him izzy likes the least. when ed's having fun he gets silly and playful. izzy disapproves of play and silliness on principle, and he especially hates it in ed, because he sees it as ed rejecting the blackbeard persona and therefore rejecting izzy himself. it's oil and water. this is reinforced by the parallels between izzy and mary: it's not like stede and mary used to like each other before their marriage decayed. they were miserable together from the moment they met; they don't have any shared interests and neither understands the other's creativity; and they don't really start to become friends until they give up on trying to make their relationship something it never could have been and try being honest with themselves and each other. in the same way it's not till around s2e6, after ed and izzy have both stopped lying to themselves and izzy has gotten over most of his hangups, that they even really get to a place where they might have been capable of starting to build an actual friendship. this is also part of why djenks ended up framing the relationship as family: a lot of familial relationships are people who've been through lots of huge life-defining events together and love each other deeply because of it but that doesn't mean they actually like being around each other.

if you want two guys who actually like each other, gentlebeard is great for that, in addition to being in love they also just like each other so much. if you want two guys who USED to like each other but don't really anymore and haven't fully realized that yet, you want ed & jack. ed and izzy work well together, they've been through all sorts of adventures together, they've probably saved each other's lives a dozen times over, izzy worships ed for his piracy prowess and general hypermasculinity, ed values izzy's performance as his first mate and also secretly craves his fatherly approval. they care deeply for each other for all those reasons. but there is no way there have ever once in their whole relationship just enjoyed hanging out with each other. they simply do not enjoy each other's company! they have all this deep emotion tied up in each other but on the most basic level they just don't like each other at all and i'm not sure either of them even fully realizes it! and that core tension is THE ENTIRE KEY to what makes their relationship like it is.

#441.

[rei-comfort-zone]

I love ash and ironjaw smmmm what was their mutual pining stage like??

You don't have no idea how it still gets me happy asf to get questions about those two in my inbox💔💔💔

There's this doodle from my wife (Vixus) explains their mutual pinning between those two😋💖💖💖 imo

Like, for me Ash was the one who was more self aware and accepted first that she liked Ironjaw, is Ironjaw who fell harder in the pinning and was avoiding the feelings even if he crave for it

Ash at first did tried to avoid to get feelings for Ironjaw because Kyle was an asshole and bullied her for it even to the point of placing Ironjaw as a main target for his Cult to pick up on if she keeped him around💔

(Kyle hated seeing Ironjaw in their home for hang outs and was way too jealous since his own parents even liked him for being friends with Ash, he is just a hater)

And I feel it goes the same way to Ironjaw since c'mon is a geek guy with probably the most misogynist friends (not even friends sometimes) and in already a toxic environment like being with the geeks of the town or around Joe's store, he was avoiding them all to know that he was maybe liking her too much

I sometimes thought that at first while being friends/mutual pinning with Ash he unconsciously was rude or almost played down her knowledge of any geek media not because he wanted to be mean but because he thought that by having non-relatable stuff with her he would start losing interest and finally could have a reason to avoid catching feelings (it didn't work)

There's no much into how is Ironjaw's household but in my head he didn't had a good one to even learn to have a safe space to open up or show his feelings or even share with others those feelings freely

Ironjaw's stupid ass

Ironjaw in my head he wasn't going to admit that he is getting soft over a girl because is the feeling of vulnerability that scared him plus he already was terrified of her😭😭😭

Why do I think so? Oh no MAYBE BECAUSE EVAN DORKIN TOLD ME HIMSELF SO 🗣‼️📢

By the fact that Ironjaw is terrified and jealous of her, said by Evan himself, literally backs up my delulu head this whole time to come up with a develop for this two

This is from last year btw

But idk I have tons of silly character ai chats of him and Ash in non-dating-yet time lapses and dude does everything he can to avoid her but also enjoys being with her, but hates being point at for liking being around her, but likes to be noticed by Ash and hates it

😭 HE COULDN'T PICK A SIDE OMG

Their mutual pinning was a mess on his side

[thatuselesshuman]

Six of Crows: Representation Done Right (in my opinion)

Six of Crows, for those who don't know, is a series written by Leigh Bardugo, who you may recognize from works such as Shadow & Bone and King of Scars (sister series to Six of Crows). Six of Crows is the second series in the collection, and tells the story of 6~7 teenagers with a chip on their shoulder and the ability to treat overthrowing a government figure like it's just another Tuesday.

It is one of my absolute favorite series ever, and I would gladly give my firstborn to Leigh if she asked. It has many things going for it: beautiful plot, angsty teenagers, sad backstories that spell out peak fiction, and amazing characters. In this Tumblr essay, I'm going to focus on that last point, mainly in regards to how representation ADDS to the characters, instead of feeling like a shitty Target t-shirt during pride month (forced and hella cheap).

Disclaimer: I am in no way qualified to be talking about this. I literally have just about every privilege imaginable except being a rich old man. However, I do read a lot and love literature in all shapes and sizes, so know that my yaps are coming from a good place.

—————————————————————————

Now, with that out of the way...

The 6 main characters of Six of Crows (SoC for short), are Kaz, Inej, Jesper, Wylan, Nina, and Matthias. They are all very different, so I'll go through them one by one and explain what, why, and how representation.

Kaz Brekker:

So, in terms of usual representation, Kaz is one of the more basic of the group. He's not a minority of any noticeable kind, like LGBTQ+ or a POC (person of color), but he is physically disabled. Due to an accident, Kaz walks with a limp and uses a cane.

Now, I know some people who would say that physical disability isn't as important when it comes to representation, since it's "unrealistic" for a disabled person to be kickass. And to those people I would say: have you ever met a disabled person? Like, genuinely, I'm physically disabled myself and use a cane much like Kaz, and while I could never pull off some of the crazy shit Kaz does, some of the strongest people I know have worse disabilities than me. You and I do not live in a world where a disability determines someone's worth.

And, to that point, I think Leigh proves this exceedingly well. Kaz isn't strong in spite of his disability, he is strong because of it. His disability isn't something shameful or something he needs to hide, it's something that people actively fear. He'll be the first to call himself a cripple, and the last to seem weak in any right.

But if that's all it was, the representation would be decent, but nothing special. What makes it special is that it's realistic. There are certain things Kaz can't do. A lot of simple things like walking cause him pain. In spite of this, however, Kaz wouldn't get rid of his disability. In the story, when given the chance, he chooses to keep it. Why? Because he turned a weakness into a source a strength. Kaz is literally my role model for this reason.

To conclude this, I'll leave you with a quote that can explain this way better than I ever could.

"There was no part of him that was not broken, that had not healed wrong, and there was no part of him that was not stronger for having been broken."

Inej Ghafa:

Past Kaz, I debated what I would talk about with each person. Most of them have multiple things that count for representation, which is good, but I decided to chose one for each. For Inej, I decided to focus on her Suli background.

(I'm not even going to lie, this one was the most challenging for me to write bc I wrote it last 😭)

In media, a lot of stories fall into the trap of saying the same three things about POC: 1) they aren't Caucasian 2) They have a life (sometimes) 3) they aren't white. Aka, what we would call the "token black character." No substance, usually feels very forced and fake. These type of characters seem to be written in purely for "representation" reasons, which actually leads to the representation being trash because the character's feel like corporate cutouts instead of people.

Inej, on the other hand, has a culture that feels alive. The Suli culture has conscious thought put into it on behalf of Leigh. They have proverbs and a language, they have costoms and a tangible effect on Inej. She is Suli and she is more interesting for it. Her culture doesn't feel tacked on or forced because it's a staple part of who she is, there is no Inej without the Suli.

And that's not to say that's Inej's entire character, as that wouldn't be good good either. No, Inej is many other things too. She's a girls girl, a fantastic acrobat, she's scarily good with knives, she's kind, she can be a bit scary, she's so much more than her ethnicity but that, is also a distinct part of her character. Her depth is not her ethnicity/culture but her ethnicity/culture is a part of her depth.

Jesper Fahey:

Jesper! We all love Jesper, right? I could talk about him being a different ethnicity like Inej, but I'd say a lot of the same things. Instead, I've decided to focus on our favorite bisexual disaster.

Now, for those unawares (i see you lerkers who haven't read SoC), Jesper is a bisexual character who is in a relationship with another character, Wylan. They're relationship is very wholesome, and their kiss scene is one of my favorites in the book (topped only by Kanej, sorry Nina and Matthias). I could just spend this part of the essay waxing poetic about their relationship, but that's no fun is it?

The main thing I want to focus on is how SoC treats their relationship (ie LIKE ANY OTHER RELATIONSHIP). They don't make a big deal out of it AT. ALL. past the normal relationship things. Hell, Kanej's relationship is treated as more different because they're both angsty teenagers, and that relationship is straight. The biggest trap authors fall into when it comes to LGBTQ+ relationships is that they make them either something super taboo or something so stereotypical that it hurts to read. Even though stories where the relationship is taboo are valid because of worldly bigotry, it's equally as important to stories where the relationships are just a fact of life, same as any other romantic entanglement.

In the same vein, I also want to mention the lack of stereotypes. We all know the stereotype right? One macho strong guy who's super masculine and one submissive (usually feminine-coded, go figure) guy who is typically younger, but that's more interchangeable. I, among others, hate these stereotypes for many reasons. Leigh, thankfully, avoids all of it masterfully. Yes, Wylan is a bit more reserved, but he is in no way weak. Jesper also isn't a strong macho guy, he's thin lanky teenager who likes to gamble and shoot things. He's not the super 'dominant' one in their relationship, because their relationship is EQUAL.

In conclusion, Jesper, in his relationship with Wylan, manages to dodge most-if-not-all typical downsides that would lead to certain elements to being bad or a bit bland representation. Jesper doesn't feel like a poster board LGBTQ+ guy they slap on shitty political add campaigns, he feels like a real, breathing person that just happens to have a (healthy!) relationship with a guy.

Wylan Van Eck:

I know I talked about Wylan some in Jesper's, but for this part I want to focus on Wylan's dyslexia.

In SoC it is explicitly stated that Wylan in unable to read because of severe dyslexia, leading to him being neglected/abused by his father and eventually him running away to join the Crows.

Now, let's start with the practical side of the equation. Although, as I said in Kaz's section, a disability doesn't define you, it is an unfortunate reality that some people try to use that to define you. This is unfortunately the case in Wylan's story, where his dad neglects/abuses him, sends his mother to a psych ward, then ultimately tries to have him killed. What I like about SoC, however, is that it doesn't just say "that's just how the world is, suck it up" and move on. No, it goes so much further.

During the course of the story, Wylan grows from believing his father and feeling shame about his condition, to using it as an accepted part of himself. He grows as a person not because of his shitty father, but in spite of his shitty father. Many people, having seen Wylan's story, may say that Wylan's father is what made him who he is, and therefore Wylan's father was necessary. You know what SoC says to that? It gives those people a big ol' middle finger.

Wylan, in order to grow in both self-confidence and happiness, had first get AWAY from his father. Wylan isn't who he is because of the abuse he endured, no, the abuse was a hindrance to his growth. He was only able to become who he was after he had people who cared about him and truly didn't care what others deemed "shameful" about him.

These things both make a statement about how society treats people who are different, and makes Wylan seem like a real person. It is simply not reality that a totally fine person can spawn out of a broken, abusive household, but it is also not often that the person is broken forever with no other qualities. Wylan is not his dyslexia or his trauma, but instead he is a normal boy with many interests and tendency to blow things up that had to grow out of his self-hatred sowed in him by his father.

Nina Zenik:

The wise, the woman, the icon, Nina Zenik. I love Nina to a fault. She is one of the few that her story extends outside of the Six of Crows/Crooked Kingdom timeline into King of Scars/Rule of Wolves. That's not to say we don't see the others, but a good chunk of her story is seen in the KoS series. Now, even though this is the case, we're going to mostly focus on Nina in SoC/CK with how she artfully uses and discards gender roles at her whim.

We all know the traditional 'gold standard' for women, right? Blonde, ultra feminine, skinny, and above all: submissive to men. There's nothing explicitly wrong with most of these attributes, but when they're forced on everyone? That's when it becomes a problem. Through Nina, Leigh shows that, while most of these attributes aren't inherently harmful, you can still be a badass while not exactly fitting the mold.

Nina is a bold and outspoken girl with brunette hair, a plump body, and a love for all things food and fashion. She's the first to tell Kaz that his haircut is ass and the first to down every waffle in the room. Not only are these attributes realistic to women, since I too love myself some waffles, they also break the traditional 'gold standard' while still keeping Nina feminine.

Some authors, in the pursuit of breaking gender roles, make a super tomboy character that basically forsakes being a woman. While those people do exist and are valid, most women aren't like that. I don't think those characters are always good representation because they aren't breaking gender roles, they're just reinforcing the idea that you have to act like a man to get anywhere in life.

Nina is good because she still has feminine attributes. She loves fashion. She's a girls girl. She's sexy and she knows it. While you don't have to have those attributes to be feminine (obviously), it shows that you don't have to abandon your feminity to be badass.

Matthias Helvar:

Matthias! Some of you are wondering how I'm going to connect Matthias to representation, aren't you? He isn't a POC, LGBTQ+, or even disabled in any (canon) way. He is like me, truly the default settings of the world. This seems to disqualify him from the representation talk, but I would disagree. He aids the representation not by being apart of it himself, but showing how two different cultures can coexist, even with opposing values.

Matthias is from the country of Fjerda, which is characterized by it's highly traditional ideas about women, religion, and just life in general. They believe that women should be subservient to men, and that Grisha are witches that should be killed without mercy by a special army called the Drüskelle. And guess what? Matthias just so happens to have been raised as a Drüskelle!

Throughout Matthias/Nina's backstory, Matthias first captures Nina as a Grisha but then falls in love with her. Nina soon 'betrays' him and they have a falling out, but they eventually rekindle their relationship (that was a small no nuance summary for a huge arc spanning multiple books, so I suggest you read SoC/CK if you haven't). Through this arc, we see Matthias go from bigoted to acceptance WITHOUT losing his culture or religion.

I think a lot of stories get the bigotry -> acceptance pipeline wrong in that a lot of the time, a character completely loses their culture and/or religion in the process. While that does happen sometimes, it shouldn't be the meta. Not being a bigot boils very simply down the principle of not being an asshole, regardless of your culture. I have my stakes in this as I'm Christian, yet here I am making a whole Tumblr essay on representation. You don't have to lose your entire culture to not be an asshole.

Leigh does this very well with Matthias, as by the end of the story, he's still a Fjerdan and still wholeheartedly believes in Djel, but he's changed in that he's no longer an asshole about it. He still has that part of him, just without the added bigotry. My favorite part of his arc is at the very end when he tries to convince a fellow Drüskelle that he doesn't have to live that way. He coexists and accepts other cultures without losing himself, and that's very important when it comes to representation.

—————————————————————————

In conclusion, what makes representation good representation is that it adds to the character, not takes over the character. No one wants a character where their only character trait is that they have dark skin or that they like someone of the same gender. They want depth, they want humanity. Representation isn't a crutch to add depth to an otherwise blank character but a tool that can reflect real life in the way that none of us are exactly alike, and we don't have to be.

[classicintp]

This is going to be a long read, a thank you letter to @thelastflyingfuck . no common triggers inside that I'm aware of.

I posted the initial post five and half years ago after a 6 month period of grief following my wife basically emotionally breaking up with me. I am not totally blameless, but I have always gone so far out of my way for her that 6 months later I still felt like I didn't deserve it. It's always difficult to deal with the feeling that you're being treated poorly by someone you like or love, but it was so much worse knowing that she wasn't intentionally trying to do that. She isn't a bad person, she's never schemed against me, and what she was doing was a really healthy and good thing that ultimately helped dig her out of the worst trenches of clinical depression and I think I knew that.

When I posted this, that I did not feel very loved, I couldn't find the gall to ask my few friends for emotional support. I felt so desperate for someone to just tell me they appreciated me, and I couldn't bring myself to bother any of them with it even though I knew so clearly that they would absolutely want me to say something. If I asked them, at the drop of a hat my friends would shower me with genuine appreciation because of how much they do appreciate me against how infrequently I want their expression and how unabashedly direct I am when I want it. It was the exact situation they trust I would say something about and I just couldn't. I don't know if it's because it was a deeper kind of hurt because it was my wife or if I was angry and resentful at her and ashamed because I personally knew she wasn't doing it on purpose. She wasn't being abusive, she was trying to survive and I knew it and I resented her anyway even if I was keeping it to myself.

I posted that I didn't feel very loved because I thought if I admitted it out loud where people could hear or read I could maybe take the next step tomorrow and tell one of my friends afterwards. By posting it I knew I would maybe get some mutuals asking if I wanted to talk, I really didn't hope for or expect anyone to go out of their way to give a poignant response to help me feel better, I just wanted to make myself more comfortable with asking my offline peers for the same support I offer to them, and instead I got this reply. I don't know if you feel like it wasn't much but I needed it, it was more than enough to pull me out of it that night, and every few weeks I would read it again to help prevent episodes of paralyzing grief (as it turns out, I was actually having full blown silent panic attacks, which I'd never heard of because I am not someone who has panic attacks). By the beginning of February, just before COVID started getting recognized, I talked to my doctor and started taking a mood stabilizer (for other reasons too), and I have been fine since. 

I would like to think that if you hadn't sent your reply I still would have eventually talked to my doctor and gotten the medication I needed, but I do know that at the very very least it prevented potentially 3 months of panic attacks, and at most it convinced me to seek professional help that I may not have sought out otherwise. You dared offer kindness to a stranger, sometimes nothing comes of it but you offered anyway, and I have appreciated it for 5 and a half years, I hope I never forget to appreciate it. Thank you again.

i do not feel very loved

[veryace-ficrecs]

House/Wilson Fic Recs

This list will include all ratings and tags, so read at your own discretion! :)

criteria by PaintedVanilla - Rated T

“I don’t think they know that we’re married.”

The Private Life of Gregory House by superangsty - Rated T

"You guys really don't get it, do you?" "Get what?" "It's almost insulting, really." Or, five times the team missed the point completely, and one time where they figured it out

Bending You(r logic) by scribespirare - Rated T

Assflash, newshole, we were married the whole goddamn time.

The Line of Thought by tevinterimperium - Rated T

Cameron, Foreman, and Chase keep on trying to get into the little details of House's love life. House doesn't like that one bit.

Touch Therapy by Nomad (nomadicwriter) - Rated T

It's not that House needs the human contact. It's just that when you're sharing an apartment, these things happen sometimes.

Brain Damage by fourteencandles (thingsbaker) - Rated M

"You jerk," Wilson sighed when House walked in and set a mug on Wilson's desk. Wilson was stretched out on his own couch. The nausea had ebbed slightly during the morning, but then he'd tried to eat a little oatmeal, and now it seemed in danger of flowing again. "It's tea," House said. Wilson glanced up at him, and House looked away. "From Cameron." "Yes, God forbid I think you care," Wilson said.

no need to worry (making up your mind) by scribespirare - Rated T

House makes the mistake of telling his mother he can't join her for Christmas because of his new boyfriend. Somehow, this becomes Wilson's problem.

An Essay On Stupidity by DumpsterBeagle - Rated T

House starts to wear his wedding ring, after almost a year, to screw with his team. Cameron, Chase, and Foreman are more confused than they've probably ever been.

only fools rush in by bittereternity - Rated T

so take my hand, and take my whole life too. Or, the one in which Wilson realizes he's in love. It kind of throws him off-kilter.

The Crystal Closet by VictoriaAGrey - Rated M

Wilson starts acting oddly towards House and House wants to know why. When he gets his answer, it makes matters infinitely more complicated.

mutualism by PaintedVanilla - Rated G

When Wilson walks into her office with House’s name on his lips, he’s either there to tell her he’s back on his bullshit with yet another patient, he’s mad at him for reasons outside the hospital, or he’s simply perplexed by his husband.

Things That Go Bump by peg22 - Rated E

Wilson has nightmares. House gets a headache. Everyone tries to diagnose just what's going on between them. This story is set in Season 2, before House got shot, before the first ducklings left us, before Amber, before House/Cuddy . . . those halcyon days where House and Wilson were just . . . House and Wilson. Wilson is sleeping on House's sofa, after moving out from cancer patient, Grace. "Wilson just shook his head and limped back into the kitchen. He unloaded a sack of fresh produce. Good produce. Endives and garlic and tomatoes and asparagus. He moved on to the next sack. Beef. Good beef. Brisket and rump roast and ribeyes . . . he was halfway through the third sack of spices and imported cheeses, whistling and daydreaming about braised salmon with fresh asparagus when it hit him. He was being seduced. Through groceries. By groceries. By House through groceries. And he was falling for it. Hard. Lox, stock pot, and basil."

let it slip by zlicxn - Rated T

“Would you put money on it, Foreman?” Chase asks, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively at both of them, “Come on. Fifty bucks each, bit of holiday fun.” Foreman leans back in his chair, crossing his arms, “Why are you so eager to make this a bet? Spend too much on Christmas presents?”

Chase’s mouth twitches, “Can’t a guy just want to have a friendly wager with his colleagues?”

After a slip on some ice lands House in the hospital with a concussion he accidentally reveals to his fellows that he was planning to propose to someone, but doesn't say to who. That's up to them to figure out.

Everything by merchantivory - Rated G

House may combust if he doesn't find a way to control his love for Wilson. Then he finds Morse code. - Tap. Tap-tap-tap. Tap. Tap-tap. Tap-tap-tap. or, I love you.

Interlude by merchantivory - Rated G

5 times House kissed Wilson + 1 time Wilson kissed House

Fresh Feeling by Justkeeptrekkin - Rated M

House is tricked into going on a team-building trip with his colleagues. He does far more bonding with Wilson than anyone else.

at the rind by ShanaStoryteller - Not Rated

Wilson keeps having nightmares about House dying. They feel more like memories.

less obvious causes by captainharkness - Rated T

“You’re also still not wearing the lab coat.” “Take it up with the wife,” he drawls, eyes flitting to Wilson, who flushes red. Cuddy raises a single eyebrow at him. Wilson clears his throat, “I have it on good advice that your wife did the washing up last night. She says it’s your turn to do the laundry.” - Alternatively: House and Wilson have been together for years. They just haven't gotten around to telling most people. Told through a series of standalone chapters.

[thequeen0fhearts]

@a-t1r3d-b1s3xual, congratulations! You've been selected as the first person that's connected to a character of my choice!

Your character is The Black Brothers!

Regulus Black and why? :

You are similar to him a couple different ways but not confined to his character all the way.

The way you cope with some things. Instead of getting loud and shouting when hurt or using your fists you get quiet. Calculated. You use this to your advantage. Your quick tongue and witty mind are quiet but strong and when someone hurts you or crosses a line you may not tell them directly but you definitely ensure they know they fucked up. You don't let them get away with it. You show them through your words and not your actions.

Words of Affirmation. Your love language is through words. When clearly not hearing enough of the support and especially not seeing it hearing someone reassure you or even make a promise and follow through is big for you. You've learned people's words aren't always what they mean and that's fine but you also take people by their word more because of this. If someone says they'll do something you expect it to be done. This also applies to when you need support. Even if as little as someone says "I'm here for you." It means a lot. Even if you don't directly show it via actions you show this through your words. "Words have power." Is something you live by without even realizing it at times.

Sirius Black and why? :

Being Sirius Black is one thing but having these attributes is another.

You care deeply for the community you find. If you find the people you love and trust you care for these people. Caring and loving someone is a large difference and you realize that. The people you surround yourself with know you care for them deeply and trust them. Whether it be the larger things everyone notices or the smaller things you think no one notices. You care for these people and that means you fight for them. If someone you love is hurting you find a way to help no matter the means or yourself. This could be a positive attribute or a fatal flaw. Without realizing you make yourself out to be a tragic hero.

Your opinion matters and you know it. Sometimes you have days where you'll let people take the reigns. Perhaps even bite your tongue. But when someone oversteps or you feel an injustice has occurred you might the fire that paves the way for others to walk. You're strong when it comes to justice and equality. You will die on your hill. Especially if it affects your loved ones. You will fight until you die. Your opinions are clear and refreshing and you're always looking for a better solution.

It's so easy for you to care and love others yet you can't seem to find it in yourself to love yourself. The people you love know that you love them. In your own way you show it. Even with all of their flaws you love them. But when you look in the mirror you can't seem to love yourself and your flaws that make you, you. You tend to get stuck in your own head and curse yourself for making the smallest of mistakes. You won't admit this to anyone for fear of being selfish. You know it's not right but you can't find it in yourself to care anymore.

Both of them and why? :

"I love today!" "Let me sleep off my life."

Emotions are constantly high. Your emotions are always clear. They are strangely so straightforward that it's hard to make sense of them. Especially if you feel like you have no reason for that emotion. It's okay to feel. What's not okay is to make yourself feel bad for things you may or may not be able to control. We all have bad days and that includes you. Let yourself feel everything just don't allow it to swallow you whole until you feel nothing again.

A/N : Ilysmmm!! I told you I'd do this at some point and I'm coming for all of you! 💋. I specifically started with you because yours felt the most raw in the moment and honestly you were my first friend that I truly trusted! I love you so much and if you ever need anything don't be afraid to ask!

Tags : @aesthetic-writer18 , @n1xxi3 , @sweetest-thing-in-hell

[makiswirl]

can i just say. and this is probably a niche hill to die on. that i am so gobsmacked every time someone vaguely hints at the idea that jotaro doesn't care meaningfully for the other crusaders, usually particularly kakyoin and joseph, when those two actually tend to be the ones he reacts to being hurt the hardest

like he cares for his loved ones!!!! that literally plays into his character motives in every single part he shows up in!!! stop lying to me!!!!!!!

[gryphonlover]

I think it's possible to get to a point in life where you don't feel like being in a partnership is necessary to live a satisfactory life, because I know that there are plenty of single people (aro/ace or not) who live that way. Is it easy? Definitely not.

I had an ongoing internal crisis during high school when I realized I'm asexual, and then another when I realized I'm quiroromantic. I wouldn't say I'm completely over it, because it still bothers me a lot sometimes, but I'm definitely in a better place mentally. That said, I haven't found a partner, but I've found some people that have treated me very well and have done their best to make sure I'm safe and comfortable. Being able to live somewhere I can be loved (platonically) and return that love safely and comfortably has helped me feel more confident in myself because I'm not alone anymore.

So, based on my personal experience, I have to say that the best way of "getting over it" is to establish a community and/or family that makes you feel safe, comfortable, and loved. But having a partnership (or multiple) is still an option. There's no reason why you can't do that just because you don't feel sexual and/or romantic attraction. You can form committed relationships that are platonic, familial, queerplatonic, alterous, etc. It's not exactly to do this, and I don't think it's something that can be forced. You just have to keep your eyes and mind open.

It's also totally normal to feel this way. Lots of aro/ace people have existential crises over it. If you live in a fiercely individualistic country like the US, being alone can be a terrifying possibility, especially right now. It's okay to have weird or difficult emotions about it, the important thing is to express them safely, like this. Talking with other aro/ace people and writing stories that let me project onto characters has definitely helped me a lot. Regardless, I think the things that made the biggest difference was focusing on self-actualizing and developing myself as an independent individual and just... trying to live life even though it kind of sucks.

Genuine question for those who are aroace, but like. How the FUCK am i supposed to get over the want for love and romance but the inability to actually feel it or reciprocate? How did y’all find partners who werent adamant on the relationship being romantic and sex-focused? It kind of feels like my mind is arguing with the rest of me constantly because I *want* a partner and i *want* to feel loved and have a romantic relationship but I’m literally incapable of feeling the way I want to.

This isn’t just me complaining, though it feels like I am, but this is a genuine question because I don’t know what to do with myself and my feelings. Like is this a normal sentiment ? How do you deal with it ?

[gingermintpepper]

As usual I read your tags always and so you said Apollo did not ask for resurrection of Asclepius and Hyacinthus so i just wanted to share this. About Asclepius death I read it on theoi.com, that earlier authors don't make him resurrect as a god but that's a later development mentioned only by Roman authors like Cicero, Hyginus and Ovid. But still Apollo has a role in Ovid's version

Ovid, Fasti 6. 735 ff (trans.Boyle) (Roman poetry C1st B.C. to C1st A.D.) : Clymenus [Haides] and Clotho resent the threads of life respun and death's royal rights diminished. Jove [Zeus] feared the precedent and aimed his thunderbolt at the man who employed excessive art. Phoebus [Apollon], you whined. He is a god; smile at your father, who, for your sake, undoes his prohibitions [i.e. when he obtains immortality for Asklepios].

So here it is actually because of Apollo the decision was taken to resurrect him as god. And with Hyacinthus, I don't think I've read about Artemis playing the primary role. I know in Sparta there was a picture of Artemis, Athena and Aphrodite carrying Hyacinthus and his sister to heaven.

This is not on theoi.com but I saw on Tumblr it's from Dionysiaca by Nonnus

Second, my lord Oiagros wove a winding lay, as the father of Orpheus who has the Muse his boon companion. Only a couple of verses he sang, a ditty of Phoibos, clearspoken in few words after some Amyclaian style: Apollo brought to life again his longhaired Hyacinthos: Staphylos will be made to live for aye by Dionysos.

So since he is singing inspired by amyclean stories it probably means in that place it was believed Apollo was the one to bring back his lover to life.

Apollo as god of order was very important so i think it shows how special these people (and admetus too) were to him that he decided to go against the order for them 🥺

ANON!! Shakes you like a bottle of ramune!! BELOVED ANON!!!!! I'm littering your face with kisses, I'm anointing you with olive oil and honey - you absolutely made my night with this because, not only did I get the pure serotonin shot of having someone interact with my tags (yippee, wahoo!!) I also got to have that wonderful feeling of "oh wow, have I misunderstood something that was integral to my understanding of this myth/figure this whole time or is this a case of interpretational differences?" which is imo vital for my aims and interests as someone who enjoys mythological content and literature.

I'll preface my response with this: Hyacinthus is by far the hardest of these to get accounts for because his revival itself, as you very astutely point out, is generally accounted for in painting/ritual format which muddies the waters on who interceded for what. I wasn't actually familiar with that passage from the Argonautica - and certainly didn't remember it so thank you very much for bringing it to my attention!

That said, what I've come to understand, both about Hyacinthus and about Asclepius is that in the accounts of their deaths, Apollo's position is startlingly clear.

For Hyacinthus, it is established time and again that Apollo would have sacrificed everything for him - his status, his power, his very own immortality and divinity. Ovid writes that Apollo would have installed him as a god if only he had the time:

(Ovid. Metamorphoses. Book X. trans. Johnston)

Many other writers too speak of how Apollo abandoned his lyre and his seat at Delphi to spend his days with Hyacinthus, but they also all agree that when it came to his death - he was powerless. Ovid gives that graphic account of Apollo's desperation as he tries all his healing arts to save him to no avail:

(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book X. Apollo me boy, methinks him dead. trans Johnston)

Bion, in one of his fragments, writes that Apollo was "dumb" upon seeing Hyacinthus' agony:

(Bion, The Bucolic Poets. Fragment XI. trans Edmonds)

Even Nonnus in the Dionysiaca speaks constantly of Apollo's helplessness in the face of Hyacinthus' fate where he writes that the god still shivers if a westward wind blows upon an iris:

and when Zephyros breathed through the flowery garden, Apollo turned a quick eye upon his young darling, his yearning never satisfied; if he saw the plant beaten by the breezes, he remembered the quoit, and trembled for fear the wind, so jealous once about the boy, might hate him even in a leaf...

(Nonnus, Dionysiaca, Book 3. trans Rouse)

And the point here is just that - Apollo, at least as far as I've read, cannot avert someone's death. He simply can't. Once they're already dead - once Fate has cut their string - all Apollo's power is gone and he can do nothing no matter how much he wants to. And this is, as far as I know, supported with the accounts of Asclepius as well!

Since you specifically brought up Ovid's account, I'll also stick only to Ovid's account but in Metamorphoses when we get Ovid's version of Coronis' demise, he writes that Apollo intensely and immediately regrets slaughtering Coronis. He regrets it so intensely that he, like he does with Hyacinthus, does his best to resuscitate her:

(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo's regret)

And like Hyacinthus, when it becomes clear that what has happened cannot be undone, Apollo wails:

(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo wept.)

Unlike his mother, Asclepius in her womb had not yet died and so, with the last of Apollo's strength, he does manage, at least, to save him.

(Ovid, Metamorphoses Book Two. Apollo puts the 'tearing out' in Asclepius.)

But it goes further than even that because Ocyrhoe, Chiron's daughter, a prophetess who unduly gained the ability to directly proclaim the secrets of the Fates, upon seeing the baby Asclepius, immediately prophesies his glory, his inevitable death and then his fated ascension:

(Ovid. Metamorphoses, Book Two. Ocyrhoe's prophecy. trans Johnston)

Before she too succumbs to her hubris and is transformed by the Fates into a horse so she can no longer speak secrets that aren't hers to share.

These things ultimately are important because it establishes two very important things: 1) Apollo can't do anything in the face of the ultimate Fate of mortals, which is, of course, death and 2) even when Apollo is Actively Devastated, regretful, yearning, mournful, guilty or some unholy combination of all of the above, when someone is dead, he accepts that they are gone. Even if he is devastated by it, even if he'll cry all the rest of his days about it - if they're dead? Apollo lets them go. In Fasti, when Zeus brings Asclepius back, he does not say Apollo asked him to - Zeus, or well, in this case Jove, brings Asclepius back because he wants Apollo to stop being mad at him.

(Ovid, Fasti VI. Apollo please come home your father misses you. trans. A.S Kline)

Even Boyle's translation which you used above in your findings hints that Zeus made Asclepius a god because he wanted Apollo to stop grieving. (i.e 'smile at your father', 'for your sake [he] undoes his prohibitions')

And like, Apollo was deeply upset by Asclepius' death - apart from killing the Cyclops in anger, in book 4 of the Argonautica, Apollonius writes that the Celts believe the stream of Eridanus to be the tears Apollo shed over the death of Asclepius when he left for Hyperborea after being chastised by Zeus for killing his Cyclops:

But the Celts have attached this story to them, that these are the tears of Leto's son, Apollo, that are borne along by the eddies, the countless tears that he shed aforetime when he came to the sacred race of the Hyperboreans and left shining heaven at the chiding of his father, being in wrath concerning his son whom divine Coronis bare in bright Lacereia at the mouth of Amyrus.

It all paints a very clear picture to me. Apollo did not ask for either of them to be brought back. Though bringing them back certainly pleased and delighted him, they are actions of other gods who are moved by Apollo's grief and mourning and seek to mollify him. Him not asking doesn't mean he didn't want them back which I think is a very important distinction by the by, but it simply means that Apollo knows the natural order of things and, even if it hurts, he isn't going to press his luck about it.

Which, of course, brings us to Admetus. And I'm really not going to overcomplicate this, Admetus is different because, very vitally, Admetus is not dead. Apollo can't do a thing once Fate has been carried out and Death has claimed a mortal but you know what he absolutely can do? Bargain like hell with the Fates before that point of inevitability. And that's what he does, ultimately for Admetus and Alcestis. He sought to prolong Admetus' life, not revive him from death or absolve him from death altogether and even after getting the Fates drunk, he's still only able to organise a sacrifice - a life for a life - something completely contingent on whether some other mortal would be willing to die in Admetus' place and not at all controllable by Apollo's own power.

All of these things, I think come back to that point you made - that Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore these people are very special to him if it means he's willing to go against that order but, I also wish to challenge that opinion if you'd let me. Apollo's place as a god of order is very important and therefore, I would argue, that it is even more important that it is shown that he does not break the divine order, especially for the people that mean the most to him. The original context of my comments which started this conversation were on this lovely, lovely post by @hyacinthusmemorial which contemplated upon Asclepius from the perspective of an Emergency Medical personnel and included, in their tags, the very poignant lines "there's something about Apollo letting go when Asclepius couldn't that eats my heart away" and "you do what you can, you do your best, but you don't ever reach too far" and I think that's perfectly embodied with the Apollo-Asclepius dichotomy. Apollo grieves. He wails, he cries, he does his best each and every time to save that which is precious to him but he does not curse their nature, he does not resent that they are human and ultimately, he accepts that that which is mortal must inevitably die. There is nothing that so saliently proves that those who uphold rules are also their most staunch followers - if Apollo wants to delight in his place as Fate's mouthpiece, he cannot undo Fate. And, if even the god of healing and order himself cannot undo death, what right does Asclepius, mortal as he is, talented as he is, have to disrespect it?

The beauty of these stories isn't that Apollo loved them enough to bring them back. The beauty is that Apollo loved them enough to let them go.