#I am attracted to this goat so much

[heyitsmechuey]

When it Rains, It Doesn’t Always Pour (Rauru x Reader)

Rauru x Reader Fluff Shot - No content warnings

It’s Rauru just being Rauru (or at least my perception of him; soft and sweet, and very convincing in his ways when he wants to be ;) I haven’t wrote for a while, and this is my first time writing for TotK, but there really isn’t any spoilers in this one! I did proof read but please understand there still may be errors Word Count: 742 words

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Heavy rain padded softly on the stone railing beneath your uncovered arms, effectively dampening them as you looked longingly toward the fields of Hyrule where small pools formed within the courtyard. It wasn’t supposed to rain today, but it did, and now more than ever you felt anxious and trapped within the castle’s hard, stone interior - your only saving grace being the balcony for a moment to reflect, fearing the dreariness. A soft sigh left your lips as you cupped your chin in your hand, accepting the defeat that going out to explore the lands with your husband was now out of the question.

You felt like a child being punished, and thought yourself childish too, for acting so sombre over an uncontrollable aspect. At least 10 minutes passed, staring into a landscaped void and feeling sour in your own thoughts. “The time will not pass any faster if you watch it, you know?” The sound of his soft gravelly voice snapped you from your depressive state, and the chuckle that followed made you forcibly pout as you spun your heels around, looking upwards at the playful features he displayed for you. He didn’t seem bothered by cancelled plans at all. His regal capabilities surfaced as he chose to carry out other duties earlier that day, but now what was left was a lover - playful but wise. You sighed again before attempting to justify yourself. “I know...”, your confession came slow as your gaze studied the floor, “but we had plans..” His hands came from where they rested behind his back, to folding over themselves once again in the front, waiting patiently for you to have your moment. When your eyes darted back up to check him, a pitiful smile let him know that you were okay and visibly, he loosened up and took gentle but determined steps forward. When he held his hands out, you instinctively followed, placing your own on top of large, outreached palms. Taking a moment to run your thumb over the faint lines, you let out a puffed laugh as he visibly shuddered under your touch; like it was the only thing keeping his heart beating. He studied you, then proceeded trail his hand up to your cheek and moved your sullen gaze to align with his. It didn’t matter what time of day it was, Rauru had a natural, calming charm at all hours, and he was smart enough to know how to get you to forget the little irritations with ease - with love. “Come, we can make new ones.”

He brushed lightly at the locks in your face, dampened by the rain that rode the wind. On the second sweep, he leaned in closer until warm breath against cold skin was tickling you,

“I can prepare some tea and then we can have a moment to ourselves for once.”

His voice was like honey, convincing you to turn a blind eye to your worries, to take only him in, and forget that there was a problem in the first place.

You felt suspicious for that reason, catching on after years together that his hold on your heart was powerful. With an eyebrow raising uncontrollably, you had to ask: ‘Just us?’. You reflect on how long it had been just the two of you for company; whether it be chatting, reading, or playing chess to pass the time. There was a sting for loss and you cursed on Ganon for taking such tender moments from you, leaving you desperate to want your King as a partner, not a diplomat. Rauru gave a curt nod, fingers coming to rest on the small of your back, giving a delicate push to signal it was time to get out of the cold. “You have my word, my love.” You trusted his words, always, and allowed him to escort you back inside. The corners of his mouth twitched upward, closed but cocky as you gave into him his touch - a sense of accomplishment filling him as you straightened yourself up and ditched the previous sadness for a genuine better mood. His lips were soft and sweet as he placed an endearing kiss upon your head, muttering that he loves you as the two of you retreat into the warmth. You could go out tomorrow - weather permitting - but if it rained again, the thought of spending it indoors with him, didn’t sound all that bad.

[dr-spencer-reids-queen]

invisible string

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Female!Reader

Word Count: ~1.1k

Warnings: fluff

Request by anon: this is about to be super self indulgent but could you by any chance do a spencer reid x barista!reader maybe he keeps going back to the same cafe or something and memorizes like little facts about coffee or something lol i love your writing so much!!

Summary: Spencer keeps going back to the same coffee shop not because of the coffee but because of a certain someone that never fails to make him smile.

Square Filled: invisible string by taylor swift for @spencerreidbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

“I need a double shot espresso and a strawberry refresher,” you call to your coworkers. You’re working the register when a tall man walks up to the counter. Man, he is super cute. “Hi, what can I get for you?”

“I don’t come here often but I hear you don’t take large cups? What are they called?”

“Venti?”

“Yeah, that,” he chuckles. “What do you recommend?”

“I personally love anything caramel. It gives me enough sugar to counteract the bitterness of the coffee.”

“I’ll do that, then.”

Man, he is clueless but he’s so cute. You’re not sure if this is a bit or if this is who he actually is but you like it.

“What kind of coffee do you want?”

“Hazelnut Americano with caramel drizzle.”

“You got it. Anything else?”

“No.”

“Name?”

“Spencer Reid.”

He pays for his coffee and you start making his order since there is no one else in line. You write his name on the cup and walk to the pickup section and call his name. The way he bounces over to the counter is kind of cute.

“Have a nice day, Spencer,” you grin and hand it to him.

“Thank you. You, too!”

The next day when Spencer comes in, he is more confident. He’s still nervous since he finds you attractive but he’s not going to let that stop him.

“Hey, I remember you. You ordered the hazelnut Americano yesterday,” you smile and greet him. You yawn and cover your mouth. “Sorry. It doesn’t matter how much coffee I drink, I am still tired.”

“Did you know that coffee was discovered by an Ethiopian goat herder?”

“I did not but it makes sense. He needed all that energy to round up all the goats. What’s your name again?”

“Spencer.”

“Yes, that was it. Sorry, I have a terrible memory.”

“I have an eidetic one.”

“What is that?”

“An eidetic memory is the ability to recall an image from memory with high precision—at least for a brief period—after seeing it only once and without using a mnemonic device. I have an IQ of 187 and can read twenty-thousand words a minute.”

“So, you’re really smart?”

“Yes,” he chuckles.

“Okay, come back tomorrow and I’ll have a fact for you.”

“Deal.”

There is a line forming behind him so Spencer quickly orders and leaves just as fast as he came. You have to wait an entire day to see him again and this time, you have a fact lined up for him.

“Hi, Spencer,” you smile. “I think I got a good fact for you today.”

“Let’s hear it.”

“Did you know that ketchup was once sold as a medicine?”

“In the 1830s, it was believed that the condiment could cure almost anything, including indigestion, diarrhea, and even jaundice,” he nods.

“Alright, smarty-pants, I’ll have to try harder tomorrow.”

“I have one for you about coffee. Did you know that bees love the taste of coffee?”

“Is that why they always fly near me when I’m having my morning coffee in my sunroom?”

“It might be.”

Another line is forming so you grab his coffee order and move on with your life. The only thing you’re looking forward to now is Spencer when he comes in. He shows up the next morning at the same time he’s been showing up, and you find yourself smiling because of him.

“Spencer! The usual?”

“Actually, get me your favorite drink.”

“Are you sure? You’re not allergic to anything?”

“Nope.”

“Coming right up.” You ring him up and accept his cash. “I have another fact, and I think it’s a good one. Did you know the Vikings discovered America and not Christopher Columbus?”

“Yes, approximately five hundred years before Christopher Columbus, the Scandinavian explorer Thorvald, brother of Leif Erikson and son of Erik the Red, died in battle in modern-day Newfoundland.”

“Okay, you’re good.”

Spencer blushes at your small compliment. “My head is filled with facts that I can’t seem to forget like coffee beans are actually the seeds from the coffee plant’s berry-like fruits. The coffee plant is a shrub that grows in tropical climates in parts of Africa, Asia, South America and North America. It produces an edible berry-like fruit known as a coffee cherry, which typically contains two coffee beans. These beans are then processed and roasted to create the coffee we know and love.”

“I did not know that.” You really like talking to him but every time he comes in, there is a line forming behind him. You have to move on so you put in his order. You turn to your coworker who barely begins to make his order. “Can you take this? I want to make his cup.”

“Sure, smitten kitten,” she grins.

You grab the empty cup and make your favorite drink for Spencer. When you’re done, you write your number on the side of it in hopes he will use it.

“Spencer?” He walks up to the counter and you smile. “Here you go.”

“Thank you. I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“I’ll be here.”

Spencer doesn’t notice your number until he gets to his car. He smiles which makes you smile because that is a good sign that he likes what you did. The next day, he comes in with someone. He hasn’t used your number yet but maybe he’s nervous. The man with the dark skin encourages Spencer to make a move on you, and he pushes him toward you.

“Hi, Spencer,” you smile.

“Hi. This is my friend and coworker, Derek Morgan.”

“Hi, Derek.” You turn to Spencer. “I got one for you. I really think I’ll get you this time. Did you know that in Ancient Egypt, the New Year celebration was called Wepet Renpet?”

“I didn’t know that.”

“Wait, really?” you gasp.

“Are you serious?” Derek asks Spencer at the same time as you.

“I’m sorry, yeah, I did.” You tip your head back and laugh. “While we celebrate New Year’s Day on January 1, the Ancient Egyptian tradition was different every year. Meaning ‘the opener of the year’, Wepet Renpet was a way to mark the annual flooding of the Nile River, which usually happened sometime in July. The Egyptians tracked Sirius, the brightest star in the sky, to time their festivities.”

“You know, one day, I’m gonna get you. I’m gonna know something you don’t.”

“I’ve been barking up that tree for years now,” Derek chuckles. You and Spencer look at him and he nods in understanding. “I’ll go wait over there.”

“What can I get you two?”

“Caramel Macchiato and a Hazelnut Americano.”

“Is that all?”

Spencer looks at Derek who nods in encouragement.

“Would you like to go on a date with me?” he stutters.

He blushes as he talks which is super cute.

“I’d love to.”

“Great. I still have your number. I was nervous about using it but I will now.”

“Don’t wait too long,” you grin.

There is something pulling you and Spencer together, something of an invisible string.

x

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[somehow-a-human]

Whose POV is it Anyway?

A Companion to Owls.

DO NOT ASK NEIL ABOUT FAN THEORY

Job 30:29-31 I am a brother to dragons, and a companion to owls. My skin is black upon me and my bones are burned with heat. My harp also is turned to mourning, and my organ into the voice of them that weep.

Continuing my analysis of the narrator/POV perspective of Good Omens season two with a look at the episode 2 minisode set in 2500 BC, Uz. God, I love this minisode.

For reference & context, I recommend reading these posts:

Whose POV is it Anyway? - Introduction

Lens Filters

POV "Your 'Something's Wrong' Voice"

POV a Trip to Hell and a 25 Lazarii Miracle

We open our journey into the land of Uz with Crowley giving Job's goats a speech that sounds awfully similar to his own troubled relationship with The Almighty. Crowley is alone here. The episode cold-opens and we've had no lead up to suggest otherwise, so this is Crowley's POV. His hair is short and more vibrant, I'd say this is likely the Black Diffusion FX filter.

Yes for the sake of this post I am doubling down on the fact that there are TWO SEPARATE WIGS. See more here.

Aziraphale arrives, he looks cute and silly, the permit is long, the goats are "destroyed" and they part ways.

The next scene we get is Aziraphale in heaven checking with Muriel and the Archangels that the permit Crowley has is in fact legitimate. This time, we are seeing Aziraphale's POV. Heaven is a stark white office building but the golden hue is almost overwhelming in this flashback. The Bronze Glimmer Glass filter is clearly being used here.

Aziraphale decides he's going to confront Crowley about saving the children, little does he know Crowley wouldn't harm them to begin with but regardless...

When we re-enter the minisode, we do so via a subtle zoom in on Crowley's face in modern day. We then enter the scene through Aziraphale's illustrated Bible and see Crowley asking Job where his kids are. We've again lost the golden glow of the BGG filter, moved back to the BDFX filter and into Crowley's POV. Crowley's hair is still short, Aziraphale isn't present here, he's alone, so these are his memories.

When we see Crowley walking up to the house to find the kids we have switched back to Aziraphale's POV. The scene is extremely warmly lit, it's soft and yellow, and Crowley is now in a different wig. His hair is much longer, softer and more attractive looking. In one of the X-Ray behind the Scenes videos I even caught a screenshot of the film slate from this scene and you can clearly that they've written in BGG as the filter used, so we have confirmation.

We continue through the Job minisode in Aziraphale's POV. The reveal of the goats, saving the kids, the ox rib temptation, the first conversation about loneliness, it's all from Aziraphale's POV. until after he "comes to" in the bookshop in present day.

When we revisit the minisode, and for the remainder of it we are seeing it from Crowley's POV which was an interesting thing to realize. We see Crowley and Aziraphale witness Job speaking with God, saving Jobs children, deceiving the Archangels, and having their emotionally revealing conversation overlooking the beautiful sea all from Crowley's POV. His hair remains short and more vibrant red throughout all of it, we don't see the return of his long long gingery waves. The lighting when the angels are present for the children's "resurrection" is very warm but I'm going to chalk that up to the Heavenly Hosts presence.

It makes sense that this reaction is Crowley's POV. Silly silly angel, did a good deed and thinks he's a demon?! But then he realizes how upset Aziraphale is, how scared and he comforts him. He tells him he isn't going to do anything that would hurt him, that would get him in trouble. Then, something about the fact that what follows is also from Crowley's memories, his perspective...

"That sounds..."

"Lonely? Yeah."

"But you said it wasn't."

"I'm a demon. I lied."

NEXT POV The Dirty Donkey & I think I Found a *Clue*!

[queer-ragnelle]

i’m new to arthuriana but love your posts nonetheless

i am just curious about the many references to gawain sleeping with so many people when, to my understanding, in sir gawain and the green knight he specifically breaks this promiscuous behaviour and makes sure he doesn’t sleep with the wife of the duke

(i apologize if this is a stupid question!)

hello anon!

welcome to arthuriana and thank you so much for the kind words. this is not a stupid question at all! the truth is gawain is nothing if not inconsistent between texts haha. he's different from other knights such as lancelot who pines solely for guinevere across text after text, in that it seems every author wanted to create their own special gal for gawain. he therefore has numerous women attached to him, and when readers try to reconcile those many texts into a single story thread, it gives the impression our mans gawain gets around! (and he does!) i have several examples here to illustrate this so i'll put it below a cut.

for all the textual variance, sir gawain and the green knight is the exception that proves the rule—meaning that it's perhaps the only text in which gawain is abstinent. we know this because one of the five virtues attributed to the five points of his pentacle crest on his shield is chastity.

furthermore, on the wife's second seduction attempt, gawain pleas his own inexperience with "love" (ie: women).

whether or not that's true is up for debate, but it's worth mentioning, as it's a departure from other texts where his virile prowess is well-known, and in the knight of the two swords, he openly boasts about his own attractiveness and popularity. (humble guy, that gawain!)

there are several examples of gawain's reputation with the ladies preceding him and actually benefitting his odds of getting laid. one of my favorites is from lancelot part II in the vulgate. gawain had just cured his brother agravaine of an illness and agravaine's amie basically wingwoman's her sister.

goated of her. so gawain pencils it in on his calendar. later, he locates the castle, sneaks in, and succeeds in bedding the maiden. she's not named here, although malory later refers to her as "the lady of lys," and accredits her as the mother of gawain's three sons, (although the couple never formally wed).

among the strangest of examples is the middle english text the carle of carlisle, in which the carle brings gawain to the bedchamber and orders him to make out with his wife. but things quickly heat up...

so the carle stops gawain from outright cuckholding him, then leads gawain to his daughter's chambers, gives them his blessing, and locks them inside. at the end of the text, gawain marries her.

now i would be remiss not to mention my beloved the wedding of sir gawain and dame ragnelle. i think it's notable that ragnelle specifically asks for gawain by name, much like the lady of lys did (according to her sister and her warm reception of him).

now the conclusion of this poem brings us to another theme of gawain's which ties into his many partners, and that is his consistent subservience to ladies. he breaks the curse on ragnelle by granting her "sovereignty" in the relationship. this seems to be another aspect of character which sets gawain apart from other knights, as this is not a chaste expression of courtly love, but a precursor to fornication, and draws the attention of strong-willed ladies, such as ragnelle, with whom he is "a coward," or according to the translation notes, "submissive."

then again in roman van walewein, he's already famous by the time he meets his ladylove, ysabele, and whilst tied up in her father's prison, he leaves the decision of his own life in her hands.

which then results in their coming together because this is a gawain story and he always gets the girl.

even in the post vulgate, which we can all agree portrays every single character at their absolute worst (and is therefore invalid<3), gawain's choice of words consistently upholds the lady's desires above his own. at first, gawain intended wingman for pelleas by pretending he, pelleas, was dead to begrieve arcade. he discovers instead that she's elated by pelleas's supposed passing, so she and gawain fall in love. but even after admitting his feelings, he still takes great pains to frame the final crossing of that line as her choice, and only relents when she makes her intentions plain.

he might also just like it when women boss him around if his treatment from orgeluse in parzival by wolfram von eschenbach is any indication.

similarly to the knight of two swords, in parzival, gawain is aware of his fame, fosters it, and then employs his orgeluse brain worms as a motivation for sparing lives instead of like...morality.

i think what's particularly interesting about gawain's relationship history is that many of his partners are named, whereas it's pretty common for damsels and maidens in medieval texts to exist without identities of their own. there are so, so many named, interesting, fully developed women linked to gawain, it's actually pretty awesome! here are a few more:

lunette in yvain: knight of the lion by chrétien de troyes...

amurfina in the crown by heinrich von dem türlin...

bloiesine in the 4th perceval continuation by gerbert de montreuil...

marjorie in gawain and marjorie by oscar fay adams (if we extend our search through the 20th century!)...

and on and on forever! so in conclusion, gawain has been pulling bitches for many hundreds of slutty, slutty years, and from what modern retellings i've read, authors have no intention of interrupting this trend. i hope that helps clear things up somewhat. thanks for the ask!

[civilight-eterna]

OOOOOH.. any of the hunters + irene breeding kink for request

(because you're a goated polyshipper like me...you get laurentina/irene/skadi sandwich. love and kisses)

...

Perhaps Irene's time with the Abyssal Hunters had neutered her fears in a way that others had not experienced. She has always been one to speak her mind in the first place, and when she observes-on multiple occasions!-Skadi dismissing herself from a talk with Laurentina the moment Irene arrives, she begins to wonder at it. Laurentina's musical giggles and the barely-masked scowl it incurs from Skadi sit Irene with the all-too-familiar sense of having things unsaid about oneself in thinly-veiled secret.

She's been singled out before, during her studies. She should be used to it.

But perhaps, she expected a little better of her newer peers.

So she steels her resolve and confronts her directly, on a whim, in the corridor.

"Skadi. You have been avoiding me, and I would very much like to know why."

"I've been avoiding you because I want to get you pregnant."

A beat.

"E-Excuse me!?"

This time, Laurentina is the one to excuse herself. She grins and hoists the hem of her skirt with a sweeping curtsy and a mirthful smile, dipping around from Skadi as she exits the conversation-

Or at least, she tries.

"Y-You! You stay put-you're, you owe me some explanations too-" Irene fumes, her face burning hot, still reeling from Skadi's blunt remark.

"Oh my, such an aggressive little birdie today. But I don't think staying would be very wise of me-"

Irene did not think it possible for Skadi's face to ever entertain an expression that could plead for mercy. And yet, that is exactly how she looked as she turned her gaze to Laurentina with haste.

"Please."

It takes Irene aback to see her ask so plainly, even though saying things plainly is what she knows her for.

Laurentina smiles and acquiesces, much to Skadi's visible relief.

"Then let's take this conversation somewhere more private, shall we?"

...

"-It's something of a leftover gene with our less-Aegir side. It's quite troublesome, especially for a certain Orca that says things as she thinks of them." Laurentina finishes the explanation, mercifully succinct, and without too much teasing.

"It's frustrating," Skadi's voice is tense, cutting in sharply, "I don't even have the anatomy to make it happen. But it aches all the same."

"...I see." Irene wonders whether it was the best idea to have this conversation in Skadi's room, in full view of the bed.

Not out of any concern that something would-happen. She just thinks-

How awful it is, to be without control over one's body. How painful, to have to resist those urges, to constantly expend energy in such a way.

And...

How flattering, that all this time, what she'd mistaken for being made fun of in secret had turned out to be admiration, even if it were only because of some physiological response.

What should she even suggest?

"Is there nothing I can do to help?..."

Irene doesn't realize she's wondered it out loud until she glances up and sees Laurentina hide a smile behind her hand.

"Or-I mean!" Irene's face warms instantly as Skadi regards her, "It-doesn't need to be me, if you don't want-"

"I do."

"Excuse me?"

"I am attracted to you. You bled two weeks ago. You're fertile-"

"H-H-How do you-?!"

"Sharks can tell." Skadi answers her outburst calmly. Laurentina's smile is wider, if a little guiltier for it. "And-"

"I-I'm-" Irene's mind reels, feeling like she's reacting to each point in halved time. She doesn't even have the chance to be outraged or indignant-it's all just shock.

Skadi closes in, her presence slow and calm, like she's come to some determinations about her in the last few minutes on her own.

"-Willing. Aren't you?"

Skadi's hand closes around one of Irene's, and she brings the back of it against her mouth.

Irene has been aware of her shorter stature for some time. In general, but especially compared to her new colleagues. She beholds Skadi with quietened awe, the sleek angles of her cheekbones, the texture of her lips against her fingers, the velvet-steel look in her eyes.

"Y...Ye...s."

"But I would break you apart." Skadi says seriously, "Even without something to put inside of your-"

"Aa-ah-! I get-I get the jist!"

I'll die if I hear another word of this!

Laurentina, her fingers curled beneath her chin, tilts her head and shares her musings.

"Suppose you just...went through the motions until you were satisfied? I could help."

"Help how?" Skadi's brow furrows.

"Relax, no need to be so territorial! You said as much yourself-you'd break her apart. If I were beneath her, to counterbalance you, you should be able to really cut loose."

"I wasn't being-"

"I know. But it's cute when you get flustered. Right, little birdie?"

"I-It's no laughing matter. Skadi is in considerable pain, no? And this is-"

-Sacrilege, if the church ever caught wind of this arrangement-

"-fine with me. I just want you..."

Irene trails off, glances up into Skadi's eyes. Back down again.

"...to feel better."

...

It's not wrong to help someone who is hurting. Surely, there were-contingencies, for this sort of thing.

Irene knows very well there are not.

But there should be. It's not the church's fault they had no way to conceive of all of the ways in which her people might suffer, when the scriptures were written.

She rapidly realizes that there is absolutely no justification she could offer, to herself or any higher power, for as to why she agreed to be held down against Laurentina's supine form as Skadi doubles over her and grinds, hard, between her legs.

But she soon becomes more concerned with more mortal matters.

All of Skadi's weight is anchored into her hips, and she ruts into Irene through their clothes like she's chasing her very bones. Laurentina writhes beneath her, rolling her between them, easing the worst of the pressure, but the sensation is suffocating.

Her hands scramble for Skadi's shoulders, and she can feel Laurentina's thighs pressing into her backside as she cocoons her with her body.

"Hhhah, you're close?" Laurentina coos, and Skadi groans into Irene's neck, closing her between them like a vise-

My...ribs are going to crack, Irene thinks numbly, and her head dips back over Laurentina's shoulder as a strangled cry rumbles out of her chest, She's going to break every bone in my body, if this keeps up-

Skadi's hand clutches her suddenly beneath the knee, hiking it up as she grinds closer, harder than before.

"S-Skadi, you're, g-going to kill me-!"

Those must have been the magic words, because Skadi's voice pitches and her entire body shudders, rolling with the aftershocks as she slumps over Irene, breathing hard. Something in her was sated, Irene can tell that much.

She's breathing hard too. There's a little too much humidity between her legs to all be sweat, and she pants, desperately-

"-It's, it's hot-"

"Take these off next time then." Skadi's voice is slightly muffled over her shoulder. She doesn't move a muscle.

"N-Next time?!"

"Mmhm."

Laurentina's hands are drifting, silky-soft, beneath her skirt, pressing and poking at her thighs.

"Oh, see." She hums as Irene winces, "I don't even have to see here to know that she's all bruised up."

Irene whimpers, and Skadi nuzzles her, just below her ear.

"...Sorry. Really."

"D-Don't worry. Just save your strength."

"Mmhm."

It's funny. Irene thinks. Anyone else, I would expect to say something about the obvious divide in our abilities, would point out how strange it is for someone like me to tell her what to do. But she doesn't sound disingenuous at all.

"You too, brave little birdie." Laurentina's legs tremble beneath hers, and she takes a shivering breath that makes Irene wonder how she managed to take on everything at once. "Not even my finest clay can withstand such pressure-you're truly a resilient medium of your own right." Laurentina's dexterous fingers slide up around Irene's shoulders, gently kneading them, releasing tension, "That being said, you'd probably appreciate a slightly...softer touch? I promise I'll be careful with you while Skadi sleeps it off."

Irene sighs, tilting her neck into the touch.

She has nothing to say for Skadi having fallen asleep already-she'll be joining her soon.

[mint-8]

New World, Unknown World - Beastars AU

Disclaimer: This story takes place in the universe of Beastars. You could see it as a self insert story, but I prefer to view it as a canon x oc story. I don’t have a good grasp of the manga or the anime, but I’m writing everything based on what I’ve heard. If there are any inconsistencies, errors, or criticism to improve the story, I’ll gladly read them.

Trigger/Content warning: Mentions of death, blood, gore, and swearing/cursing.

The scent of trash invaded my nostrils, which was the first thing I noticed when I was barely regaining my consciousness. It was foul - no, wait, scratch that. It was worse than that. It smelled like the stench of putrid meat that someone just left in their garbage without proper sealing. The kind of odor that would definitely attract any sort of pest and would definitely be breeding grounds for maggots and flies. It smelled just like…

“A fucking butcher dumpster…?!”

Yep, that’s right. Me, [redacted], barely 17 years old fox found myself in the middle of some butcher trash alleyway. Rex knows how long I’ve been here, just inhaling whatever toxins that have been resting in the overflowing trash bags where my body is currently laying on.

“Gross”

As I slowly lifted myself up from the disgustingness I tried to remember how I even got here. If my memory served me right, I had just finished exploring the city’s museum from our class field trip and was walking back to the hotel with my friends, the most lovable yet infuriating twin cats I’ve ever met. My brother was still caught up with his friend trying to find enough information to finish their own report. The last day it was due.

Either way we were walking to the nearest bus stop and… Fuck, what else?

“That’s as far as my memory goes… Did we ever get on the bus?”

Perhaps the bus was too full and I decided to walk back? And then got lost? Somehow?

Doesn’t matter, the important thing is I need to get out of here and find a police officer or a local who can help me. As I walked away from the disgusting alley, a new scent caught my attention. Coppery and… salty? Wait a minute.

“Am I in a fucking market?”

Great, just fantastic. Somehow I got lost and ended in the city’s local market. Awesome.

But it didn’t looked like a normal market for what I could see. There were no stalls for fruit, vegetables or even bread. It was only rows upon rows of… meat stalls?

“Are you serious?” I said to myself, in disbelief from the gory sight that was this market. The stalls had freshly cut corpses of chickens, rabbits, deer, sheep… any herbivore you could think of, it was probably there. But no carnivore meat for some reason.

“… I think I’m going to vomit…”

Rex, this is so disgusting… How can they stomach the smell?! The bloody combination of the corpses with the vendors and the other customers sweat was way too much to bear! And why the fuck where they buying this shit?! It must have so many bacteria and diseases from not being properly refrigerated and treated!

“Oh Rex…” I couldn’t believe what I saw by my right. A black panther was gutting open the body of a goat… with no gloves on! What the hell?! You’re going to maneuver meat like that?! At least clean your fucking station man! I can see the rest of the blood and guts you didn’t bother to clean from the previous batch!

“I’m going to be sick… I need to get out of here…”

I proceeded to advance through the bloody market while trying my best to cover my snout. I might be traumatized from the disgusting sights, but I at least want to save my nose from smelling putrid meat.

As I kept advancing and dodging anyone that got in my way, I accidentally pushed someone and they fell.

“Oh Rex, I’m so sorry! Are you ok?” As I offered my paw to lift them up I noticed it was a pale looking goat who I bumped into.

“Oh… It’s fine…” the goat murmured, but as he glanced up at me, with those somewhat lifeless eyes of his, a small shaky smile rose on his lips “You look hungry young man… would you like some?”

He then let go of my hand to show me his other hand… which was oozing with blood and trembling as I could see he was missing 2 of his fingers…

“What the…”

“It’s ok, don’t worry…” he said, with a breathless voice “They are very cheap… choose whichever you prefer…”

What. The. Fuck. Is this bitch for real?! There’s no way I’m eating some random ass goat fingers! The holes were the rest of his fingers should be must be definitely infected with something by now! And what do you mean ‘choose whichever’?! I can’t eat fucking raw meat! That’s disgusting!

“No. I’m fine.” I tried my best to escape the conversation but the motherfucker wouldn’t let it go!

“Please… they are very good… I can promise you that…!”

“Dude, no. This is weird.” As I backed away from him, he just started to get even closer!

“Are you worried they aren’t tasty…? They taste very good, I swear to Rex!”

I couldn’t take this any longer, I was backed into one of the stalls and the putrid stench of rotting corpses and the goat’s fingers turned out to be too much for me.

“I said no!” I shoved the goat out of my way and quickly left. I started to speed walk, nearly running. I don’t care what happens now, I just want to get out of here!

I could hear the grunts and complains from the other animals around me, but I couldn’t care less. The sensory overload was getting to me and I started to hyperventilate. Everything was too much and too fast. I had trouble breathing. I could feel my eyes watering and a well known pressure started to fall over my body. That sort of feeling like if a huge blanket of despair and sadness was slowly engulfing me, not allowing me to stay calm.

I ended bumping into someone that looked way stronger than me. They gave me look of danger as if challenging me to dare to bother them again. I murmured a shaky ‘sorry’ as O entered another alleyway away from them. Away from the awful smell. Away from the gory sights. Away from everybody.

“Rex… please…” I collapsed to one of the walls and slowly fell down to the filthy floor. But at this point, I didn’t cared anymore. As I slowly made myself into a ball, one thing kept repeating in my head.

I want to go home.

…

I woke up once again. I felt way too tired and exhausted. My body felt heavy and I was hungry.

“Took you forever to wake up”

I could hear a deep voice somewhere within the room I was in. Wait. Where am I? I tried to get up but, again, my body felt like if a truck had hit me. I felt pain everywhere.

“You shouldn’t move too much kid. ‘Less you want to get hurt”

I accepted the man’s advise and just stayed in the bed. Not moving an inch. I at least could move my head and to my right there was a… panda? Oddly muscular, for some reason.

“H-Hi? Uhm… who are you? W-Where am I?”

“Looks like we have a blabber mouth, eh? It’s basic manners to introduce yourself first kid.”

Are you serious? Whatever.

“Uhm… I-I’m [Redacted]… and you?”

The panda was silent for a couple seconds.

“Gohin” Huh, nice name “Now kid, it’s my time to ask questions. What the hell were you doing at the Back Alley Market?”

What.

…

Character profile

Name: [Redacted] (although Y/N, Reader, can also apply)

Age: 17

D.O.B.: N/A

Species: Fox.

Background: Their world doesn't see eating meat as taboo. However, it is considered somewhat of a small luxury.

Extra fact: Swears a lot.

[chuuyasfanboy]

I have been brainrotting about this ALL WEEK. Chuuya coming home to you after a big mafia christmas celebration and he gives the reader shotgun kisses.... YES PLEASE i am folding in HALF like a plastic lawn chair

Merry Christmas!

Chuuya x Gn!Reader

Tw: Smoking

Today had been so absurdly long. Chuuya had a strong social battery, one that could last hours without fail. But today was just too much, even for him.

He'd spent the whole night by Kouyou's side, acting as her escort- not that she needed one, she was perfectly capable on her own -and bodyguard at the mafia celebration. It was a long year for the group, and Mori threw a massive party in celebration of the operation's continued success. Chuuya, as one of the five executives, was personally requested to make a speech.

And the moment that was over, he was pretty much done.

He couldn't drink, not while keeping an eye on Kouyou. As ashamed as he was of it, even the lightest bit of alcohol could have him passing out in just half an hour. And of course, he couldn't smoke. With the combination of Elise and Yumeno both in the room, it was just bad manners. Plus, Akutagawa would suffer for it.

And that left Chuuya without any way to handle his anxiety. Safe to say, when he got home, he threw his hat and goat onto the rack with a bit more force than he really needed. Then he headed straight to the balcony to light himself a very much appreciated smoke.

You arrived home not 10 minutes later, far less exhausted. Work had let you off for the whole day, and there were no parties to attend that you didn't go to willingly. You'd spent the night celebrating with friends, and had only just left.

A smile crossed your face at the sight of Chuuya's beloved hat in it's place by the door. A clear sign he was home and waiting for you.

The soft breeze of an open sliding door made you aware of his location, and you didn't delay in meeting him there. He looked stressed, you noted. He only smoked when he was. And currently, he was leaning over the edge of the railing, staring out into the city while the dim light of his cigarette illuminated his face. As all things Chuuya did were, it was incredibly attractive, enough to leave you just a bit red in the cheeks.

Out of politeness, you knocked quietly on the glass before stepping outside next to him. His head turned and his eyes immediately met yours, gaze softening.

"Bad night?"

"You wouldn't believe."

He turned back to the view again, a ring of smoke puffing from his lips and evaporating into the sky. What a sight.

As you stepped closer, his free hand retreated to wrap around your waist, pulling you just close enough to feel his warmth. His eyes fixed on you for a moment, narrowing thoughtfully.

"Wanna kiss you," he mumbled, just loud enough to reach your ear, "You don't mind a shotgun kiss, yeah?"

With a nod of your head, he leaned forward, eyes keeping open just a crack, just enough to watch you. Smoke and Chuuya was all you tasted for a second, two pleasant feelings mingling, and your smiled against his lips.

Only then did his eyes close, satisfied with your reaction. Pulling back for just long enough to take another drawl from his cigarette, he leaned in again, this time breathing smoke into your mouth purposefully.

"I love coming home to you, sweet thing..."

[stabbyfoxandrew]

Mer roadtrip? They have just met each other and I am frothing at the bit to see where you take it text (I love it)

-💖💖

WIP Wednesday (7/3) | Mer Roadtrip AU (Part 36)

“Santa Monica.” Andrew repeats. Until now, he hadn’t had a clue where he was. All he knew was he was far from Las Angeles, farther from Oakland. And across the country from his home.

“Yeah,” Gray Shirt says. “What did you do, run the whole way?”

“Most of it.” Andrew answers. Running has never been a strong suit, but when properly motivated Andrew can fucking move. Oh and he stole a skateboard that was on someone's porch steps. That helped.

“Are you going to tell me how you got away?”

With a sigh, Andrew rolls onto his stomach again, twisting his tail until his spine pops, then starts to doodle in the wet sand with a clawed finger as he speaks.

“My captor had no idea walkers existed, let alone that I was one. So I bided my time and waited for an opening. A few weeks ago, he threw himself a party for all his asshole friends. I was the main attraction. Imagine! A real, live merman swimming in the pool for all to point and gawk at. Why, it was the event of the summer!” Andrew snarls as memories of that day flash through his mind. 

“Sounds terrible.” Jean Shorts says. It’s an understatement.

“It was.” Andrew agrees miserably. Dozens of strangers all chittering about how pretty his tail was, how beautiful his hair looked, how they wished they had a tank of their own… People taking selfies near the pool with him in the background, trying to get him to pose with them-

“What happened?”

“I waited for a distraction.” Andrew says, as if he wasn’t the one who created it. Really, he got lucky. Because, finally, someone got too close. Some idiot woman held out an hors d'oeuvre to him as if he were a goat at a petting zoo. Andrew remembers the screaming. A loud splash. Water turning red. 

Perhaps they should’ve muzzled him, he thinks, running his tongue over his teeth.

“What kind of distraction?” asks Dirty Red Shoes.

Andrew swallows. “A woman got drunk. She fell into the pool. While everyone’s eyes were on her I changed, slipped out of the water, and escaped through the house. And he we are.”

“All that, naked?” Freckle Boy says, looking unconvinced. Andrew doesn't blame him. It would be quite a feat.

“Not completely. I stole a beach towel off one of the pool chairs on the way out. It’s buried up there,” Andrew says, pointing to the heaped up sand at the cave’s entrance.

“And… You’ve just been here ever since?”

“Pretty much.” Andrew says with a sigh. He’s left the cave exactly twice, wrapped in that ugly towel. Once to make the sign and once to rummage through unattended beach bags looking for money.

He’d managed to get score twenty bucks that day, but he also got caught and chased by an irate mother of three. So he didn’t try again. And the twenty didn’t last long. Maybe he shouldn't have blown it on a pack of cigarettes, a Mountain Dew, and several gas station hot dogs.

[maybeelse]

Sometimes I think about anglerfish

I don't think I need to explain why. Some concepts just have weight.

But. Sometimes I look at something that someone has written, some inhuman creature that's meant to be oh so appealing, and I think: anglerfish.

I am rarely correct in my assessment. Most writers, it seems, do not care for anglerfish. Certainly it is easy to overdo such bait-and-switches; you really only get the full impact once, and even then only with careful buildup. Once the reader knows it's a possibility, well …

But of course there is an art to it, just as there is an art to the mistakes characters must make. Glossy perfection is unbelievable; texture is full of imperfect little details. Monsters do not always need to be concealed, and truly masterful writing can lay all its cards on the table and still fill you with horrified suspense as its machinery plays out.

So I still let myself think about anglerfish.

Sometimes I think about love-bombing.

It's the same idea, really. Set aside the benthic trappings; leave those fang-like teeth at home. Keep the smile. Everyone likes a good smile. And from there …

It's not hard to make the world scary. Just look at the news. Plenty of horror happening every day, and most people just don't care as long as they've got theirs. But you're a good person, aren't you? You're watching. Witnessing. Not turning away. Raising awareness.

And, hey. Most people can't even bring themselves to do that much. Look at you! Shining so bright, trying to make a difference. You're a good person, you know that? Better than all of them.

Who cares if you're a bit isolated? If you're struggling to connect? That's the modern world's fault, not yours. It's not built for people, not really. It's more profitable to fill it up with algorithmic amigara faults! All those traps for people who don't know any better …

But you know better. You and me, yeah? Looking at the world, seeing the monsters. Seeing the anglerfish.

… what if we did something about that?

The thing that makes anglerfish culturally sticky is the lure. It's the image of stumbling across a light in the depths, a light in a place where there should never be light, and rushing eagerly towards it …

And then the smile. And then those needle-like teeth.

And then it's too late for you.

Poor little thing.

Poor little victim.

But there are all sorts of lures, aren't there? All sorts of doomed attraction. The moth and the flame, the doll and the witch …

All those little tragedies.

Do you think that the bio-luminescent bacteria in an anglerfish's lure know what they're doing? What they're part of? Not that it would matter if they did, of course: they can't survive without it.

But what does the lure feel? Wherefore the judas goat, his hoofs stained with blood …

[queen-of-the-avengers]

A New Adventure

Pairing: Thor x Goddess!Reader

Word Count: ~2.5k

Warnings: naked thor, arrogant Zeus

Request by anon: What if with thor x reader. He was at olympus on a mission then he got caught and the snap hes nude then he notice y/n near ares in robe shes a demigodess , a child of hera and shes surprised while she misses him

Summary: You long to get out of Olympus and do something with your powers that actually means something, but your father won't let you leave. When a mysterious stranger shows up looking for Zeus, you figure he's the way to getting the hell out of there.

Squares Filled: free space (2022) for @thorbingo

Author’s Note: any and all comments are appreciated <3

x

Most people know you as Hebe, the Goddess of youth but you like to be called Y/N. You have never left Olympus to explore other worlds and bestow your gift upon others. People come to you from all over for you to give them their youth back, but you can do so much more than that. You can restore youth for any living thing, which is why you’re in charge of restoring nature back to its glory days.

There are plentiful goddesses that deal with nature who can do a much better job than you, but you were tasked by your father, Zeus, to do this. No one disobeys him or questions him, so you have to do this. Not that you mind much since you love being out in nature and taking care of it.

You walk past some bushes that are wiltering a bit so you run your fingers over it to give them their life back. They bloom back to life as if they were years younger. The flowers on the bushes bloom with bright colors as they are restored to their youth. You do this to the trees in the area and watch as the leaves go from a sickly brown color to bright green.

There are thousands of other planets that can benefit from your powers but Zeus won’t let you leave. Your mother, Hera, has tried hundreds of times to get all of her children to leave but he won’t listen to her. So, instead of doing something meaningful with your life, you’re stuck on Olympus doing the same thing every single day. This place is filled with gods and goddesses that come and go while you’re stuck wishing for something more to happen.

You’ve just finished restoring life to a tree when something glints off the sunlight in the sky. You cover your eyes so you can see what’s going on when a large ship comes crashing to the surface of Olympus. You jump out of the way just as it crashes down on all the nature you’ve worked hard to restore. Two goats are on the outside of the bow. A rainbow bridge follows in their footsteps and disappears once they’ve landed.

Four people get out of the ship without a car that they’ve destroyed something as delicate as nature. They walk right past you despite the shocked look you’re giving them. No one else seems to care about the falling ship except for you.

“What the hell is your problem?” you ask and jog to catch up with them. “You ruined my garden.”

The second biggest of all of them turns around to tell you off but stops. He used to think Jane was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen but that all changes when he locks eyes on you. This is Olympus full of beautiful goddesses but you’re nothing like what he’d expected. He has a time-sensitive mission but he can put it on hold for five minutes just to talk to you.

“I’m sorry,” Thor stutters.

You have to admit, he is quite attractive but that doesn't mean he should get away with what he’s done.

“Who are you four?”

“My name is Thor, and this is Jane who is also a Thor but not the true Thor like I am. She used to be human, which she still is, but she is able to pick up Mjolnir which is why she can be a Thor,” Thor stutters.

“What he’s trying to say is that he’s Thor, she’s Jane, this is Korg and I’m a Valkyrie.”

“Ah, I’ve heard about you,” you say to Thor. “I heard you released Sutur to destroy your home. You aided in the fight against Thanos.”

“Yes, that was me,” Thor blushes.

“I’m going to scout this place out,” Jane says and takes off flying with Mjolnir.

Valkyrie and Korg leave Thor alone with you to scout on foot.

“Who are you?”

“People know me as Hebe but I like to go by Y/N. I’m the Goddess of youth. I was just restoring youth to that garden you so rudely smashed into.”

“Sorry about that,” he chuckles nervously. Something clicks in his head and it shows in the way his eyes light up. “Your father is Zeus.”

“That bastard,” you roll your eyes. “He’s practically everyone’s father around here but yes, he’s my biological father. I hate his guts.”

“Maybe you can help me then.”

“What are you guys doing here? It’s not every day that someone comes crashing out of the sky. Or did you just want to ruin my garden for nothing?”

“No,” he chuckles. “I need to talk to Zeus. Is there any way my friends and I can do that?”

“I’m sure there is but you can’t do it privately. He likes to host meetings with all the gods and goddesses as a sort of touch base. One is happening very shortly.”

“Great, let’s go,” Thor says and walks past you.

“Hold on hot shot,” you say and turn to face him. “It’s an invite-only.”

“Are you invited?”

“All the children of Zeus must attend so yes, I am.”

“Great! You can get us in.”

You walk toward Thor and put a hand on his very muscular chest.

“Why would I reward you for ruining my garden?”

“I’m sorry?”

“No, I don’t want your apology.”

“What do you want?”

“I want a kiss. Right here,” you point to your cheek.

“Really? Okay,” Thor shrugs.

Thor leans down to press a kiss to your cheek but you move your face at the last second so that your own lips capture his. He’s shocked but doesn’t pull away from you. He thought you were beautiful the second he laid eyes on you, so kissing you is a plus. Your mother is the Goddess of Marriage and Childbirth so naturally, flirting and romance come easily to you. You pull away from him after a couple of minutes and produce a ticket for him.

“Wait, I have three friends with me.”

“No, only you,” you smirk and walk away from him.

You should have known he was going to find some way to get his friends into the meeting. You’re sitting next to your siblings and mother but notice four people walk in wearing disguises. You can see past Thor’s disguise and can only assume his three friends are the other ones in disguise. Thor scans the area until his eyes land on yours. You smile and shake your head to which he shyly shrugs.

“Zeus! Zeus! Zeus!” everyone chants to welcome the most powerful God.

A thundercloud appears high in the room as he creates a platform for himself and his entourage. Everyone cheers when he makes an appearance but you roll your eyes in boredom. He conjures his special thunderbolt and throws it into the air. It splits into several smaller bolts and flies into the air all around the room.

As soon as the introduction is over, everyone falls silent so that they can hear what Zeus has to say.

“First order of business is where we should hold the orgy!” Disgust fills your face at the thought of participating. “The second order of business is to discuss the winners for the most human souls sacrificed in the name of a God.”

You groan and face plant into the palm of your hand wishing you could be anywhere but here. Thor’s whispers to his friends can be heard even from where you’re sitting, and that doesn’t go unnoticed by Zeus.

“Excuse me, who is talking?” Zeus asks and everyone looks at Thor. “You there! Why are you interrupting me?” Thor stands up to talk but is a bit quiet due to being put on the spot. “No, I can’t hear you. Please come up to the stage.”

Thor hates being put on the spot like that but knows this has to happen. He makes his way to the stage in front of everyone nervously. Now that he has everyone’s attention, he begins talking about the real reason why he’s here.

“Gods of the universe, I come here to ask for your help, to raise an army. Gorr, the God Butcher has made himself known and is slaughtering Gods in his path. He’s left nothing but chaos in his wake. With your help, we can crush him before he kills anyone else.”

As pressing as this issue is, Zeus isn’t interested in hearing about it.

“That guy killed a couple of low-level Gods. Boo-hoo. If that’s all, go back to your seat and be quiet.”

“Did you not hear what I just said? He’s murdering en masse.”

“I’ll tell you this one time. Sit down and be quiet or else you won’t get invited to the orgy.”

Of course, your dad will pass this off as nothing.

“Zeus, we must do something! You have to listen to us!”

Zeus gets impatient and sends bolts of lightning to Thor’s wrists which he shackles to the ground so he can’t go anywhere. Zeus’ platform lowers to the stage so he can be closer to him.

“I’m going to take off your disguise so I can see you for who you really are.” Zeus flicks the clothes off Thor but flicks too hard and ends up stripping him naked. Your mouth drops open at the sight of his cock. He’s really big for a God. It’s not surprising given his nature, and he’s not even hard. He looks over at you and you close your mouth to give him a smile and a thumbs up. “What about the others? Should I flick them too?”

“Nope! Disguise gone!”

All three of his friends stand and take off their disguises so the same thing won’t happen to them.

“Ah, Asgardians. I thought we’d seen the last of you when Odin died. You are Thor, the God of Thunder.”

“Zeus, this is bigger than us. He’s taken Asgardian children!”

“Who do you think we are? The God police? Every God watches over their own people so Asgardian problems are Asgardian problems.”

“Why won’t you listen to what he has to say?” you ask loudly and stand up. “People are dying and you don’t even care?”

“Sit down young lady,” your father points to you.

“Y/N, sit,” your mother says and yanks you back down to your seat.

“How the mighty have fallen. My hero, Zeus, afraid,” Thor glares.

Everyone gasps at the insult which Zeus doesn’t take lightly. He leaves his platform and steps onto the stage. He walks over to Thor to speak to him privately even though there are hundreds of eyes on them.

“A couple of things,” Zeus says quietly to Thor and gets really close to him. “Yes, I am scared. Gorr has the Necrosword which means he can kill us. Not good. Two, I know you’re trying to do the right thing. I understand and admire that about you, but all you’re going to do is cause panic and that’s not good. We are safe here. You, my friend, are safe here. Three, don’t talk back to me. I flicked too hard. I’ll put your clothes back on.”

Zeus steps back and uses his power to put clothes back on Thor, and you find yourself wishing he kept them off.

“If you’re not going to help us, then let us use your weapon,” Thor suggests. “We need your lightning bolt.”

“My lightning bolt is called Thunderbolt. If you’re going to use someone’s secret weapon then you should at least get the name right when you ask.”

“Fine, can I borrow Thunderbolt?”

Thunderbolt!” Zeus yells and summons his weapon. He begins showing off the thunderbolt by throwing it in the air, spinning it on his finger like a basketball, and snapping it in half only to slam it together. He turns and throws Thunderbolt into the backdrop where his throne sits. You roll your eyes at the way he’s behaving.

“No!” Zeus smirks. “Don’t worry, the God Butcher won’t reach Eternity!”

The smile is lost from your face at the mention of Eternity. Every universe in the multiverse compiles into one being called Eternity. Whoever reaches it first will be granted their desires. What might happen if the God Butcher reaches it first? What might be his desire?

“If he seeks the Eternity altar, that means he could wipe us out at once,” Thor says. “Zeus, we must act now.”

“He won’t reach it. He doesn't have the key.”

“Fine, then we’ll just have to go at this alone.”

“I don’t think so,” Zeus smirks. “This place is known only to Gods and if you leave, the God Butcher could use you to gain our location. This isn’t good. Now you must stay. Guards!”

Four guards walk onto the stage to take Thor prisoner and he looks over at his friends.

“Hey, can we go with my plan now?” Valkyrie asks.

“Yes.”

“Hell yeah!” Jane shouts and throws her hammer at a guard, killing him.

All three of his friends and Thor attack the guards that come onto the stage, and you watch with shock at the fight. Thor and his friends seem to be doing okay at killing every guard that comes onto the stage, and Zeus takes this as a sign to step in. He grabs Thunderbolt and throws it at one of Thor’s friends, Korg. Thunderbolt penetrates his chest and is summoned back to Zeus.

“Korg!” Thor yells.

“Thor, I’m perishing!”

Korg crumbles to rocks and Thor turns to Zeus with anger in his eyes.

“You’re next Odinson!”

Zeus throws Thunderbolt at Thor but the God catches it in his hand. His eyes shine bright blue with electricity and turn Thunderbolt into a blue one. He throws it back at Zeus which goes straight through his heart. You gasp and stand up as you witness your father fall to the ground dead.

More guards come rushing in to avenge Zeus’ death as Thor goes to his rock friend. He’s not dead but he doesn’t have a body. He’s only a face that they can use. Valkyrie ties him to her back as she fights, and he sounds the mystical whistle to call for the goats. Seconds later the same boat that crashed into your garden comes crashing through the glass skylight. The goats fly around everywhere without a place to land.

This is it. This is your opportunity to get the hell out of Olympus. You use all your strength to jump onto the platform high in the sky and grab Thunderbolt. Thor jumps onto the platform to see you with the weapon he needs in your hand. Everyone else is already on the ship so it’s now or never.

You can either go with them or hand over the weapon.

“Well, what is it going to be?”

You look at your mother who gives you a thumbs up. That’s all you need to make a decision.

“I’m coming with you.”

“Let’s go,” he chuckles.

You two jump onto the boat just as Thor uses Stormbreaker to put his war clothes back on. This is it. This is the adventure you’ve been wishing for.

x

Follow my library blog @aqueenslibrary where I reblog all my stories, so you can put notifications on there without the extra stuff :)

[miasmaghoul]

How am I supposed to pick a wip with a list like that!? I want them all. But if I have to pick just one: could you please tell me about the dubious handy??!!?!? ♡♡♡

I SURE CAN but it's under the cut for dubcon reasons ♡

So this has been living in my head for like a year and a half at this point but I will consider it a WIP because TECHNICALLY I have written SOME words about it but honestly most of them have been used to torment @st-danger.

Anyway, the dubious handy is going to be a kinda angsty if/dew but also dewther fic that takes place in era 3, right when Things happen and the new lineup takes over. Dew meets Ifrit and there's attraction immediately, but Aether (they are together) warns Dew to stay away from him. That Ifrit's bad news, almost as bad as Alpha, but Dew has never been one to heed advice.

Despite that though, there's no time to do much about it. The new tour starts very soon and having to deal with a new lineup and all the preparations involved in that have everyone scrambling. There's some flirting, sure, but beyond that it's no more than swapped glances Dew being subjected to the sight of Ifrit humping his guitar every time Terzo turns around in rehearsals. On the road, they start their antics on stage, butting at each other like goats - it's Ifrit's idea to tease the kiss, and the tension builds.

Before they know it, half the tour is done. They're all having a well-deserved break - a night in the middle of nowhere, sharing beers around a hastily built campfire beside the bus. A little something that makes it feel like home. Dew's a little tipsy, leaning against Aether and listening to him talk to Zephyr, but his eyes keep drifting to Ifrit. Eventually he sets down his drinks and excuses himself, Aether giving his hand a squeeze. Gotta piss, he explains, shrugging on his leather jacket - it'll be chilly away from the fire - and Aether gives him a sage nod and a pat on the ass before he goes.

Dew shuffles his way behind the bus, swaying a bit as his boots crunch on the gravel. He doesn't have to go far to have privacy, and he can still hear the others chatting while he unzips. He's mid-piss when he hears crunching in the gravel behind him, and Dew sighs. Almost done, he says, but the footsteps continue. Heavier than his own, closer and closer, right behind him, and before Dew knows what's happening a large hand is batting his own out of the way, grabbing his still dribbling cock and starting to stroke.

In the distance, he hears Aether laugh, and when a too-warm breath hits his neck Dew chokes.

And then the dubious handy ensues, and it devolves into a whole internal struggle for Dew and he makes several Bad Decisions because of it.

He really should've listened to Aether.

Anyway, I really REALLY want to write this one, and I feel like when I get into a groove with it it'll come easily, but it just hasn't happened yet. 😔

[utilitycaster]

💙💜

Which character is not as hot as everyone else seems to think?

We've talked about this in DMs anyway but OTOHAN. She's physically attractive I suppose, although that's 100% from official art and absolutely not from initial description (perhaps that's just me, but Matt described her as having eyes like a bird of prey, and somehow the image of her in my head has always been. does anyone remember the weird turkey pictures of Ole Golly in Harriet the Spy (the book). Is this too weird a pull? Did I make it up because I can't seem to find an online image? Unclear.) But point being before the official art came out I was not imagining her as attractive, even. And then there's personality. Like, yeah, you can say someone is hot based on just a physical image without knowing them; this is how celebrity works. But when you've only one got one singular physical image and it doesn't really match your mind's eye which isn't terribly attractive, anyway and then there's no personality but...I can't even say zealotry because we literally don't know anything about her motivations other than raw murder. I can't even enjoy the inherent eroticism of the sword. Anyway. If you want hot middle age women villains why not og Delilah before she became a loser, or Raishan's human form, or Ripley, or Avantika, or Vess deRogna, or Liliana. If you just want hot middle age women with a propensity for violence why not Deanna with Jerry the Goat. If you are specifically interested in the "milf" archetype (Otohan is not a mother, so this is rather telling) then might I suggest Veth, who is not middle-aged yet but she is a mother and she is super good at violence. All of these women have hopes and dreams and personalities and aren't a blank dull slate to project upon, as I personally am entirely unattracted to the latter. Anyway hopefully this also fulfills one obligation to either @playerkingsley or @whirlingbadger who asked about "mischaracterized"; Otohan is a polarizing figure with many who agree with the above as well but she is also wildly mischaracterized as hot and interesting when she is at best depicted as attractive and deathly (and deadly) boring. She bored everyone to death; the sword just got in front of her.

Which character is way hotter than everyone else seems to think?

Eshteross. I fear we moved on too soon when he died. Everyone in Bells Hells wanted a slice of this hot old orc man when he was doing his sword practice, and also he was community-minded and loyal and devoted. More generally you know that post that's like "hobbits have it all figured out, farmers market high as shit, why are people horny for elves"? This is true but also might I suggests orcs. Elves are overrated. Why are people's fantasy lithe hairlessness. This is a very narrow beauty ideal and I reject it. We, as a fandom, and dare I say, a society, need to be hornier for orcs.

I'm going to go watch candela and the inbox remains closed and will for much of the rest of the day but there are two more asks that have the exact same two hearts and I will be providing two more separate answers as well as another mischaracterization answer, and possibly making an eye appointment although I'm inclined to think the hearts just look super alike on my computer.

[scun-gilli]

BAHHAHAHAA @elkaseltzer YOU GAVE ME ANOTHER EXCUSE TO YAP. YOU WONDERFUL DINGUS! YOU HAVE FALLEN INTO MY YAP TRAP.

SO! Originally, I had WAY different ideas for the Morningstars. Lucifer was the only consistent one because duh (the goat features did show up later though. Then again, his *final form* changed a lot but you guys will see that eventually teehee)

When originally conceptualizing them I spent a lot of time look at pinterest for inspo. Sadly, I can't find the original artists ANYWHERE as is the horrible pinterest curse. Also for context, I originally wasn't going to make it modern either, TRT was going to be even heavier into the fantasy element.

Gabriel was not the dorkwad I eventually wrote. He started off as a smug, heartthrob type character. One that 'gets around a lot' He was going to be sarcastic, flirtatious and conceited. He was going to wear a lot of jewelry and revealing silk robes. Piercings in...all sorts of places. Basically giving off major slut energy. The hermes imagery was also going to be a lot stronger, with the wings on the ankles and all that good stuff.

Uriel was going to be a girl for a while but I changed my mind. His personality changed slightly but not too much. He was always supposed to be the nearly aphasic oracle but what did change was his clothes (different setting.) So he had robes that looked like a moving night sky with comets and twinkling stars. The back was going to be open and he's have intricate tattoos of constellations on his back, the star patterns changing with the sky. He was also not going to have eyes at all (instead I gave him four wth?) and his robes would hide the top half of his face. He was also going to have a halo that was similar of the solar system.

Raphael was NOT sunshine boy either. I wanted him to be EXTREMELY clinical, more so than he already is. Almost mad doctor vibes like "I wonder what would happen if I swap your arms? hmmm." That quickly changed into his almost motherly demeanor he has now. He was going to have big ol' glasses and robes kinda like the Maesters in GOT but prettier because I love pretty men. Also the halos were supposed to be present all the time, his was going to move like a heart monitor but then I saw an artist do that and I really didn't want people to think I stole the idea so I scrapped it. XD (LuLu Lamb on X btw, they are AMAZINGGGG)

Michael changed the least probably. Except he was meant to be MUCH rougher than he is. More of a bossy asshole instead of the tough older brother. He was also going to have way longer hair XD, I was only able to convince myself to bring it to his shoulder blades but it was about to be luscious y'all. Oh, and he was going to have four arms.

I made Alastor softer than originally planned too. He was going to have a severe undercut, which is still kinda the case but I kind of fuck with the fuck ass bob ngl. He was going to be an even bigger asshole with a LOT more trauma than he already has. Albert was going to stick around longer so he made him even more callous. More scars too, mostly because I find eyebrow scars incredibly attractive. But I eventually made EVERYONE soft soooo sorry XD

As a final note, there were going to be a lot more siblings based on the other archangels. Instead, I am introducing them later but they are not related to the brothers. (Azrael incominggg)

[localsunnet]

monn rach lore pt 2 :3

part 2 is here yahooo

lets just cut straight into the lore guh…

again, sorry if it’s historically inaccurate and the writing sucks… 🙏🙏 any criticism is appreciated…

Monn’s boring routine changed however at the age of 17, from an accusation directed towards his family about their ancestors had made deals with the devil or something. This drove the family, more specifically his mother, into chaos as they tried to prove that they are NOT descended from sinners. His brothers stayed with Monn during this and tried to protect him from any hurtful words or bullying. (THE GOATS FRFR…)

After that fiasco, his mother blamed Monn for the event much to the dismay of his brothers, saying that he has finally attracted the demons to the household and cause misfortune to the family and most importantly, the family name.

Look at the time now, it’s the Napoleonic Wars now. Prussia is trying to find new recruits months before the battle of Leipzig! Remember the mention of his father being an officer? Well he came back home and took Monn with him as a punishment for bringing misfortune to the fanily name, even though he’s not even qualified for being a soldier. His brothers ABSOLUTELY protested, trying to persuade him to leave Monn alone, but well, that clearly didn’t work.

Now Monn is now an infantry! Hooray?? It is not fun getting yelled at by people, flinching at every cannon shot and getting told to stand still even though he can’t help it?? Absolute nightmare for him, but he can’t go back home and men shouldn’t cry. Monn has to take it and he is doing VERY well /sarc. So well infact, cannibalistic thoughts are starting to spiral.

Oh? Can you hear that? It’s the Battle of Leipzig! He gets sent off to fight in his hometown, which he is NOT happy about, and uh oh! That’s the Blight! Hell is overflowing and the damned are retaking their bodies. It was pure chaos and no one knows where to go for safety

And guess who showed up to save the day? Father Silvio!

He beckons any survivors into St. Thomas among the chaos, including Monn. Silvio during this time isn’t fond of him yet, but he takes his time to talk to Monn (even though he refuses to speak) to understand him a little better as the officers plan a way out with a temporary truce among the nations.

So the events of Leipzig happens, and it can ends in two ways:

Monn Rach ends up getting infected by the Blight and succumbs to the infection

or

Monn Rach gets out of Leipzig mildly injuried.

and I’ll have to end it here, I am SO sorry if this is short or something i kinda lost like half of my motivation in my bed writing this…

PT 3 WILL (PROBABLY) BE THE FINAL PART TO HIS LORE REVEAL.. TRUST…

(artworksc of monn and his brothers might be coming soon? Shout out to the homies for defending the silly though 💪💪 /j)

Any scenarios or interpretations are ALLOWED!!! any questions are VERY WELCOMED!!

[a-minke-whales-tale]

The Path Forward is Fuzzy, but still, I see it

I had originally written this to Sonar plus a bit from a talk with a friend but I am feeling really positive and hopeful lately and I wanted to share because I do right now really have hope that we will return to the water, that things will be okay.

I will still CW this as Unreality and Delusion because that is what the humans think, even if it is something that does bring me a lot of joy.

When I look at what must be done, especially if we were to live in captivity, the problems to solve really do not seem very insurmountable at all. Most of the suit would be essentially silicone casts of various hardness and conductivity. The thermal loading isn't actually an issue for us and a package for use to see our environment could be as simple as some cameras and screens (though having directional hearing I think would be nice as well as something which could create a delay in sound for Sonar allowing a sort of echolocation). In the simplest form I think the greatest complication is how to make a blowhole that opens and closes passively, particularly for a odontecete style blowhole (toothed whales) since mystecete blowholes have a lot more available movement for making more effective seals. But even that I have ideas on how to do. There are ideas which would introduce greater complexity which I would very much like to be able to at some point and I think are doable so we could do things like catch food, especially things a trainer might throw to us like deboned fishy or gelatine. Even in the most complex of situations, if I could come up with an effective way to remove solid waste there are only a few aspects that seem particularly difficult and we could potentially exist without needing to come out to change things for near two months.

We also aren't the first to do something like this. There are various stories of people using prosthetics or costume to transform their bodies. They may not be like us in the same way, or not openly so, but others have made themselves much more as animals at least for a short bit like the story of the man who became a goat. And techniques among furries I think can allow us to make a really rather convincing whale and dolphin, fix our bodies as much as we can without whatever technology the humans used to render us like this.

I think even finding a place to go might not be so difficult even. There are so many places that have held cetaceans, and many seem to be phasing out various orca exhibits. What may have been a very small pool for a 6-7 meter orca might not be so small to a 3 meter minke that will never get bigger than a calf and hopefully their dolphin friend and maybe some place would find that appealing. Even beyond zoos and aquariums and marine parks, I think there are a lot of places that might be willing to take us just for the novelty of us. There are Orca that live in an amusement park in Chimelong Spaceship (and Sea World and a few others are essentially amusement parks themselves at this point). I think other places be it amusement/theme parks, or a resort, or some other form of attraction might like to have the strange little cetaceans we are and there are so many across the world. I imagine in those cases we would have to perform for the humans and they might have something with them touching or swimming with us, but at least we would do so as ourselves and the humans would give us fish and it would help break up some of the monotonous boredom of most days. Humans might even be interested in it for scientific reasons, could we reintegrate with other cetaceans, could we learn more, could we be used to learn about wild cetaceans we struggle to map. Or possibly the humans might let us for artistic reasons or even some argument about the ethics of captivity since we could speak more to the experience though I don't think that would make an actually useful experiment and I imagine in that last case they might not let us stay in the water forever, but it might at least be a way to get us into the water in the first place.

The path forward is fuzzy still, I cannot see my way fully through the murk, but when I spyhop above the waters I can see so many paths forward, so many possibilities that will grant us our freedom. I do not think the waters are unnavigable, they are a bit unknown, but our kind have been navigating changing waters for 50 million years, we are good navigators, and clever animals. I do really think that someday we will finally return to the water, escape this wretched nightmare, that we will swim free, and we will swim forever.

Those first nights sleeping in the water once the suits are made will no doubt be terrifying, and in truth living like that I very much doubt I would live to my natural lifespan of 55-60 years, cetaceans who haven't had done to them what we have do not live to their natural life in captivity and any number of things could probably fairly quickly end us. Still 25+ years if I could have that in a tank would give me an incredible joy. My memory span is somewhere between 12 and 18 months, and only longer if something specifically reminds me and even then it is often spotty. I know the place I am from, but I have no memory of it, it is a name and little more. I know I have only been here a few years, and yet this is the only home I know. After a year and a half I would remember almost nothing of human life, I would be a whale again, simple as that. I might remember I was once human, and I might still understand that the humans changed me and that is why I need to come out and the humans do things to me periodically. And since I would not have constant reminders of human life, much of that memory might fade in a month or two as I return to whale life. If I were in a tank 25 years, I would go through that cycle 16 times over, I would just be a whale, the nightmare of the human life maybe would have all but disappeared from me when I return to the current. Even in a shorter time, even after a few cycles I would remember nothing, gone into the murk behind me. Likely I would have a sense of boredom and lonliness and plenty of other captive cetaceans problems, but no longer would I remember or feel the horror of what was done to me, I would be free (which is an ironic thing to say for an animal that would be held in a relatively small pool and unable to leave but it is a different type of free). Even after just a few cycles I would be free, and I hope that we would swim together forever until it is time to return to the current.

~Kala

[a-random-pillow]

TMNT The Other Haft AU, Lou vs The Hidden City

Last time on TMNT,

Yoshi (2012 Splinter) convinces Saki (2012 Shredder) to not go look for Lou (Rise Splinter) after he gets kicked out of the Hamato clan.

Action Hero Lou Jitsu got dragged down to the battle Nexus by Big Mama to become the new champion.

So I am kind of stealing someone else's AU, so thanks to the wonderful @camthecatchameleon for the Battle Nexus AU.

Draxum owes a debt to Big Mama and gets tossed into the Nexus. Of Course, big Mama puts Draxum and Lou against each other. Draxum has more rights than most participants but not by much.

Draxum is 'if you can beat me in a fight' Sexual. When they meet Draxum only as a few more weeks left in the Nexus before he is free, in those weeks he in Lou fall in love. It takes a while, them debating over humanity, sharing tragic backstories and Draxum giving exposition on the hidden City but yeah they are hella gay.

Draxum refuses to levea Lou behind in the hell known as the Battle Nexus. After he is released he instantly goes to the library to look for legal loopholes to make Lou a citizen. The solution: Marrgie. Now he just needs to get Lou alone for long enough for them to swear the oaths.

So he voluntary re-enters the Nexus. Big Mama is over joyed since 'The Baron' had been one of her biggest money makers and his fights with Lou had always drawn the most attention. So she markets this fight to hell and back.

Lou is concerned when he hears that he will be fighting Draxum again because yes the goat did promise to break him out but Lou didn't think he would follow through in any capacity.

During the figth Draxum tells Lou the plan and Lou agrees because he would do anything to get out of here and Draxum is pretty chill once you get past the whole 'I will murder humanity' bit. (Plus, Lou finds him very attractive).

See this is a magic marriage the it dose kinda Magically Bond them which is visible.

The crowd goes silent before some yells

"NEW POWER COUPLE"

Cheers, applause and demands for a proper wedding. Big Mama is pissed but #BaronJitsu is trending the Hidden Internet so there isn't much she can do.

*Insert Massive Celebrity Wedding*

Years go by and Draxum and Lou relise that they actually are in Love, so that's fun.

"I would like Children" Says Draxum in the middle of a movie.

Lou is supirsed but on bored so bip bap bop

TURTLES

The 'series' would take place in the hidden city and their main goal is taking down Big Mama. The dads didn't want the kids to be involved but they couldn't stop them.

Big Mama is killed in the climactic battle for the nexus by Lou who takes over the Battle Nexus. It's now a massive tournament and much safer. It still illegal but more moral. People win money, they can opt into death matches and they can choose their opponent.

Notes:

Draxum and Lou are good dads, they are all very close with there boys and will protect them.

Big Mama is dead, got killed by Lou in the final show down.

Meat Sweats, Repo Mantis, Hypno and the rest exist but are just Big Mama's yokai goons.

During the Series the turtles befriend the extremely angry foot recruit and have a few encounters with the foot clan.

The Turtles are aware that they have human family top side and Apriel did look into the Hamatos for them but when she read that they all died, well the boys were better off dreaming.

The boys don't have the best control over their mystic abilities, but they all unlocked them.