#But I'd still like some support if anyone would like to send me some good vibes

[werestillscreamin]

Perfect quote of the day from my guru. Three years ago my abusive mom killed herself. She struggled with severe and debilitating pain as well as mental illness. And she lost. Now I don't have to live in fear of her, but for some reason I still do. I remember three years ago I was just so mad because if she was always going to end up killing herself, what was I doing wasting my entire life living in fear of her? What was actually so terrifying, besides the abuse she dealt me? Idk, I'm not mad at her anymore, but I haven't forgiven her either. I feel perfectly fine with this decision. Forgiveness is changed behavior. My mother never truly apologized for what she did to me, and she never will now.

I had a very nice therapy session today, and I got a nice hug from my therapist. Now, I'm enjoying some of my favorite cookies after walking to get my medicine from the store. My mom is missing out on an absolutely splendid beautiful day today, it's such a tragedy. And, I almost missed out on this splendid beautiful day. I'm so scared for this coming winter. I don't know if I'll see next spring.

But, it's because of how I keep labeling each and every experience as either good or bad, instead of seeing that experiences have no quality about them. They are just there. Like I'm still here.

Just, how wonderful. Everything is fine and nothing is wrong. Aum, shanti shanti shanti. 🙏

[astonmartinii]

no more ace to play [mamma mia part two] | formula one social media au

drivers: sebastian vettel, fernando alonso and jenson button

the investigation was fruitful but now y/n has a handful of drivers and a bucket load of criticism

general note: i answered an ask about this but i thought i'd reiterate here, this is a no wives or kids au, so seb and jenson's wives and kids do not exist in this !! thank you so much for all the lovely feedback on the last part, hopefully i remembered to tag everyone who asked x

part one | masterlist | ko-fi

yourusername

liked by sebastianvettel, jensonbutton and 1.405,605 others

tagged: fernandoalo_oficial, sebastianvettel, jensonbutton

yourusername: so i guess it's kinda real now and they're all lovely x

view all comments

user4: i know the bitter old people are going to find this now but i for one think it's fucking ICONIC

user5: the guys are way too chill for the situation

user6: they've not said anything, so how would you know?

user5: idk reeks of babytrapping

user7: be for real y/n doesn't need to baby trap anyone she has her own career?

yourbff: debrief needed STAT

yourusername: literally on my way to yours right now get the non-alcoholic wine READY

landonorris: do i like get a prize for my hand in this?

yourusername: here's a gold star ⭐️

landonorris: i was hoping for some monetary rewards

yourusername: ur literally a millionaire ?

landonorris: and?

user8: are any of them gonna like comment or?

user9: very odd considering they wouldn't shut THE FUCK UP on their own posts

user10: for real they were very proud of their 'accomplishments' but now it's the consequences of their actions and theyre silent ?

user11: have yall considered the fact that finding out you might be a dad is a bit of a shock, let them all process it?

jensonbutton

liked by lewishamilton, sebastianvettel and 302,889 others

jensonbutton: back to see the old rides

view all comments

user12: SPILL JENSON PLEASE

user13: so like what team is this kid going to support they've got so much to choose from?

user14: if they have any taste, ferrari 💅

user15: i mean their momma clearly has taste so ....

oscarpiastri: nice to meet you jenson!

jensonbutton: by how much mark talks about you i could've sworn i'd already met you

aussiegrit: bold of you to send shots my way considering your current predicament

user16: mark saying this like they aren't lucky to be with y/n ?

user17: bro we all saw that you met up with y/n and the baby daddy squad... wanna maybe share some thoughts?

user18: why would he want to publicise that he got with a slag?

user17: i know you're not calling y/n a slag when we're talking about f1 playboy JENSON BUTTON ?

user19: i have complete faith that this mamma mia summer WILL have a good ending but i NEED these men to maybe actually talk about it so people aren't just out here coming for y/n ?

yourusername

liked by fernandoalo_oficial, jensonbutton and 1,209,677 others

yourusername: got myself a sweet treat and did some meditation (i.e. listening to asmr roleplay) because life is crazy and morning sickness is a bitch

view all comments

user24: not to be sappy but i am emotional watching y/n go through this, she's been on the internet for so long i feel like i've watched her grow up, idk anything about f1 but i hope they're good for her

yourbff: gosh who knew you getting pregnant would lead to us having to go to the bakery every single morning

yourusername: but but but they have such good croissants and SHUSH I BUY YOU YOURS EVERYDAY

yourbff: i know you're like my sugar mama, please still buy me pastries when you have your actual child

user25: i think we're all being a wee bit dramatic about the whole "they haven't said anything" business. yes, they probably should say they're fine with it so people stop accusing y/n of baby trapping them but ALSO we don't know what they do everyday, maybe we should just let the adults go about their business

charles_leclerc: i am basically seb's kid so i shall be a character witness: that man is an ANGEL and believe me that took a lot for me to say in public lol

yourusername: why thank you charles, i have heard a lot about you. in fact on his "provisional dad cv", sebastian directly named you, some guys called max verstappen, mick schumacher and lance stroll as fatherly experience

maxverstappen1: LOL I KNEW SEB LOVED ME BUT WTF IS A DAD CV

sebastianvettel: this is a serious matter and i wanted to show that i'm serious about fatherhood

mickschumacher: soz max, charles and lance i think WE all know who his favourite is

lancestroll: i'm just happy to be recognised tbf

yourusername: well i kinda hope this real child will be his favourite...

charles_leclerc: boring 🥱

alexalbon: well i'm gonna nominate myself as jenson's grid kid and woah that guy is great 👍

jensonbutton: sounds kinda sarcastic but thanks for the effort alex

carlossainz55: seeing as we're all here i'll say that nando is the best grid dad sorry not sorry

yourusername: you're all here but idk who you people are ?

fernandoalo_oficial: chilli have i ever told you how proud i am of you?

stoffelvandoorne: do i mean nothing to you old man

user26: wtf is going on here

fernandoalo_oficial

liked by yourusername, sebastianvettel and 1,403,677 others

fernandoalo_oficial: what a race! thankful to finally be back on the podium this weekend and i'd like to dedicate this race to the soon-to-be new addition and my new family, here's to our future ❤️

view all comments

user27: HOLY SHIT THIS IS SO CUTE

user28: i'm sorry the THUMB IN THE MOUTH CELEBRATION ARE YOU KIDDING?

jensonbutton: proud of you, come home quick x

user29: i'm sooooo chill about this

fernandoalo_oficial: i'll make sure to tell the team that THE jenson button wants the meeting to go faster

sebastianvettel: do i mean nothing? that's literally my old team name drop ME

yourusername: just tell them i've gone into labour

fernandoalo_oficial: you've not even been pregnant two months yet...

yourusername: they don't know that

astonmartinf1: this is a public instagram comment section...

maxverstappen1: maybe when the little one is actually here i'll let you win for once

fernandoalo_oficial: how kind of you?

maxverstappen1: i need the little one to know that at least one of you is cool and that i should be their favourite god father

lewishamilton: now that is a bold assumption

danielricciardo: i have been quiet on this topic but if anyone is prime god father material YOU'RE LOOKING AT HIM

yourusername: you'll all receive an email and a god father application in the coming weeks

charles_leclerc: is this another seb idea?

yourusername: maybe... but idk yall so i think it's a good idea

yourusername

liked by maxverstappen1, mickschumacher and 1,509,874 others

tagged: jensonbutton, fernandoalo_oficial, sebastianvettel

yourusername: welcome to the crazy house

view all comments

user33: so we've confirmed the poly? yes or no?

user34: i'm gonna say yes but with them you literally never know

georgerussell63: so we all sent them a jellycat?

alexalbon: speak for yourself george that sick ass rocking bunny is all albon

user35: not to be weird but this kids is literally going to have the hottest parents of all time

user36: no cause if i'm a teacher and all of them walk in for parent's evening i'm passing out

jensonbutton: oh wow what a lovely crib i wonder who put that together

fernandoalo_oficial: don't you dare take all the credit

sebastianvettel: as if anyone other than the WOOD WORK KING put that together

yourusername: guys they are lying the delivery guy put it together and they all stood around watching like dads at the airport

jensonbutton: "like dads" so still getting the experience in

danielricciardo: so who is responsible for this grandpa ass nursery aesthetic?

yourusername: well this is awkward i thought it was cute

fernandoalo_oficial: it is don't worry honey, it matches seb's overall grandpa aesthetic

sebastianvettel: you guys agreed to move to mine don't switch up on my aesthetic now

jensonbutton: oh seb we all love your certain affinity for tartan and plaid

sebastianvettel: i'm not feeling this love right now :(

yourusername: cuddle pile incoming

note: ahhh okay this was very highly requested so i hope it met expectations. i'm thinking this could defo be a longer series (i am also working on into the arms of another dw) following the whole family if yall would like that? i'm gonna try and tag everyone who requested that, i am sorry if i missed anyone x

taglist: @boiohboii @vellicora @faithm120601 @raizelchrysanderoctavius @luv4kani @minkyungseokie @eugene-emt-roe @magical-spit @ironmaiden1313 @jaydaaasworld @whoreks @rainerax @nonsensical-nonsence @laneyspaulding19 @chelseyyouraverageluigi @lxclerc @gemofthenight @woweewoowa

[kozuwhore]

i actually never thought i'd have to make a post like this but this has actually annoyed me so much. in my previous post ,, i mentioned how me and my former friend ,, luma ,, are no longer in contact with each other due to an argument; an argument that started with them getting jealous of my irl friend and felt as though i had 'replaced' them.

while i will not only talk about that ,, i will also be disclosing their behaviour that they have performed whilst me and them had feelings for each other at the time. i will be going through everything from start to end.

before i begin ,, i want to make a quick note: if you are going to send any hate towards luma ,, that is on you and you only. i am not telling you to send hate because it won't make you any better than how they are. if you want to ask them questions about what has happened ,, ask them in a polite way and avoid any conflict.

@/scaryans aka luma was my best friend of two years ,, nearly going on three. we met on wattpad due to having a shared love of yandere simulator (neither of us support the creator) and our friendship progressed from there. we became closer upon finding out we both had feelings for one another; however ,, their toxic behaviour began inflicting onto me when i mentioned lucifer morningstar from hazbin hotel:

this was the conversation we had after me posting about lucifer. mind you ,, i never said that i was romantically interested in him ,, i just said that he was a cool character and that he is me. luma ,, however ,, got 'flashbacks' to how their ex used to be interested in not just hazbin hotel but lucifer as well. as a result ,, luma kept giving me dry responses and kept going on about how they wanted to die because of this simple matter.

in these screenshots ,, i am literally begging luma to forgive me because they would be upset with me and become depressed ,, which is something i didn’t want given how i was lovesick at the time and wanted them to keep loving me. my blinded loyalty to luma is the reason why i kept sticking by their side up until this point. shortly after me apologising ,, i agreed to never mention lucifer / hazbin hotel again to them and they forgave me (mind you ,, i had to ask if it was alright for me to mention the show).

truth be told ,, i did get jealous over some characters that luma liked as well (but i didn't say i was going to kill myself because of it). one character in particular was scar from wuthering waves ‐ he will be an important topic. i felt inferior to scar and often compared myself to him ,, something i talked to luma about:

throughout this vent with them ,, they gave me little responses and told me to watch a youtuber in hopes of calming me down when i told them about me still panicking about telling them this. they told me that they're not good at comforting others ,, which is understandable ,, but at the same time ,, i wrote MASSIVE paragraphs in hopes of making them feel better:

going back to scar ,, shortly after i told them about my feelings towards him ,, they later ask me to create headcanons and smut ideas for him not even half an hour later:

they say that it's because a few hours / half an hour feels like a couple days and that it's not an excuse; but you don't bother to change your behaviour after we had a talk that nearly cost us our friendship (before now)? the first time we discussed if our friendship should come to an end is when the callout post from @/rusmii was created and i kept finding stuff regarding people talking about luma / the experiences they through with them:

a day after i posted this to the server ,, luma puts in the chat how their mum wants them to drop me. of course ,, i was confused because it was so out of the blue but then this was the explanation:

not once did they say / imply that they don't want anyone talking or sending stuff related to the post. prior to this complaint (not even a week later) ,, we were having a conversation that consisted of them posting a meme about how they feel in regards to the post:

this was us talking about their rant and how i found something else following the callout post. i literally asked for their consent and they're making it out like i could give two fucks about how they feel ,, but i have done nothing but respect their boundaries in comparison to what they did with me with scar.

speaking of scar ,, i will now talk about how my irl friend's mention of scar (as well as my friend being in the groupchat) has resulted in why i'm making this post now. firstly ,, in regards to my friend ,, they asked me if they wanted to be part of the chat upon me mentioning a few topics (such as anime) that were involved (and that they enjoyed). i asked luma and they said yes.

may i mention that luma enjoys making new friends and they were really nice to rachelle (my friend) upon them joining the chat. however ,, luma started to become jealous of rachelle due to her putting her discord name title in the chat as 'olivia's n1 bff'. she meant this as a joke because no one can have a number one best friend but luma took this heart:

i reassured them and everything was fine between us; up until yesterday. me and rachelle were at work together and i started talking about the game ,, wuthering waves ,, and how it's a channel in the chat that keeps popping up. i talked about how my friends in the server have their f/os ,, showing rachelle different pictures of them ,, but when i showed the picture of scar ,, she got a picture of him and posted it to the chat. she talked about how she's gonna play the game because scar looks cool.

but luma being luma ,, they took it wrong and thought rachelle had a crush on them. rachelle isn't part of the selfshipping community and knows little about how attached luma is to scar / jiyan. this resulted in another conversation between us:

i asked ,, if not BEGGED ,, rachelle to take the message down because luma was clearly upset about it. she did so and everything was calming down in the chat. but luma decided to send me a message about our friendship AGAIN while the second screenshot was sent to the server SIX MINUTES LATER:

in regards to them talking about us not being best friends anymore ,, i had to comfort them AGAIN about it ,, which is when i started to get annoyed about the whole thing. we made up again but for some reason three hours later they sent another rant (classic luma behaviour):

today ,, rachelle responded to the rant and everything they said was the complete truth that i wish i got to tell them before our argument outside the chat. luma aka "the person who doesn't take responsability for their actions" soon sends a response:

you call it a "comfort space" but you're literally making me and my friend uncomfortable BECAUSE NOT ONLY ARE WE SENDING "DM-LIKE" MESSAGES TO EACH OTHER IN THE CHAT:

AND THE FACT THAT SHE DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU HAVE AN UNHEALTHY ATTACHMENT TO A FUCKING FICTIONAL CHARACTER IS PATHETIC. how were we making a disturbance in the chat? you never said any specific person being uncomfortable with how we were talking plus rachelle only knew me PERSONALLY in the server ,, so did you really expect them to make friends that fucking quickly? good fucking bye.

yesterday ,, that was when our argument began and we finished it today. the following screenshots are what i consider to be the highlights of our dispute:

i can't add anymore screenshots due to the image limit but luma responded with "OH MY GOD CAN YOU ACTUALLY LISTEN TO ME FOR TWO SECONDS WITHOUT DICKRIDING RUNI AND THOSE ASSHOLES?" + "i swear you’ve been piggybacking off them this whole argument and it makes no sense."

you told me to take accountability for sending several apologies after i did something to upset you - which was a one time thing - and i did that ,, i respected that ,, but it's ironic that you're the one telling me to take responsibility when you haven't done that after two expose posts. THOSE POSTS were mentioned in the argument because you haven't grown yourself; you're still gatekeeping characters ,, getting overly jealous over my friend and saying that i "replaced" you.

just like rachelle said ,, you are chronically online and you need to go touch some fucking grass (without using it to smoke with). i reassured you TWICE about our friendship and you were still going on about it as if your whole world is crumbling. not only were you trying to gatekeep scar but you were beginning to want to gatekeep me ,, an actual human being ,, as well. if those two callout posts didn't help alter your behaviour ,, i hope to god this one does because this is coming from your former best friend of two years ,, which are years that i will never get back because of your toxic ways.

i regret ever defending you ,, i regret ever having feelings for you and i regret being your friend. you mean absolutely nothing to me and don't even think about my opinion as an excuse to guilt trip others into thinking you're the victim; you'll just be acting like a carbon copy of gabby hanna again.

if my other friends in the server don't wish to make contact with me anymore ,, that is fine. please talk to me in private and (for the love of god not) dick ride luma in the server or elsewhere by defending them with how they've acted that lead to this.

i would like to apologise to anyone that luma has villainised such as runi ,, zai ,, briar ,, ari and many others because you had every right to dislike them for what they have done to you / caused to others. the fact that i was siding with them didn't make things any better and i should have realised the moment the events that happened between you and luma were going on sooner. if you wish to speak with me about anything (whether it's about luma or not) ,, my dms are open and that goes for anyone else that wasn't mentioned above.

( taglist: @aslettes and @ddeardolly )

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 65 (Personal Lows)

cw: pregnancy loss (I'm so sorry I did not plan this.)

As well as life had been going for Heather and Conrad, reality came crashing down one Saturday when Ash was in the city with the Landgraabs. Both were spending the day at work, but Heather fell ill and called Conrad.

"Something's wrong. Can you meet me at St. Sims Hospital?"

Heather was admitted for tests, but Dr. Serra delivered the devastating news. "This happens more often than you might think this early on, but there's no heartbeat. I'm sorry."

"This is my fault," said Conrad. "My fear added stress you didn't need."

"This isn't your fault," said Heather staunchly. "Dr. Serra said this happens more often than you think. You didn't stress me out any more than the rest of our busy lives stressed me out. I've worn a glucose monitor since high school and I have to remind myself to slow down all the time. You make my life so much easier, Conrad. Not more stressful."

"This can be a difficult time for anyone," Dr. Serra said gently. "I'd like to refer you both to a colleague of mine, if you're open to it. Her name is Dr. Supriya Delgato, and she's a relationship and family therapist with a focus on grieving. I think you should talk to her when you're ready. She has an office upstairs and I can let her know she might hear from you."

"Yes please," said Heather. "Thank you, Dr. Serra."

Conrad was still apologetic when they returned home, trying to think of the right thing to say while an exhausted Heather changed into her pajamas. "I'm sorry. I should have been more supportive from the start."

"I'm glad you were honest with me, Conrad. For better or worse, knowing how you feel makes everything clearer for me."

"I do want a family with you. I want Ash to have a brother or sister, and I was looking forward to the parenting classes we were going to sign up for. I wish it hadn't turned out this way."

She embraced him. "Me too. But when I was about seven my mom had a miscarriage early, like me. She got through it, and she had Hazel a year later."

"Heather, I promise you, next time I'll be ready."

"I believe you. We don't need to think about that tonight, but I think we should schedule an appointment with Dr. Delgato like Dr. Serra suggested."

"I haven't spoken to a grief counselor since I was in high school," he admitted. "Back then I was too angry at the world to get anything from it."

She held him in a reassuring embrace. "I think this will be a good thing for both of us."

They went to bed that night feeling closer than ever, cuddling beneath the covers until they both fell asleep. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 1 Summary | Gen 1 Start

NOTE: This happened unexpectedly via the Heathcare Redux mod by adeepindigo and I was really sad about it. I'm sorry to anyone who hated this development especially after we all went through it with Conrad. I considered pretending it didn't happen since it happened SO early, but I appreciate the realistic storytelling supported by the mod nonetheless. And Conrad will be thrilled about the next one, because I'm literally sending him to grief counseling to justify me changing his trait to 'Would Love to Have a Child Right Now' without letting it flip over time. No chances taken, only plot! In all honesty Heather should have had therapy in high school so in some ways this is long overdue for them both, anyway.

NOTE 2: That last shot is the first time they autonomously cuddled (to sleep, my heart!) after the Lovestruck update. Honestly their level of flirty when they're together is usually sky high and blocks out most of their sad moodlets, hence the smiles despite this really sad installment. When it comes to Conrad, Heather isn't unflirty whatsoever.

[cvnntagious]

understanding

intent :

the purpose of my original post was to educate on the principals of basic respect, and hopefully create a more positive sturntumblr community. of course, it didn't work that way, as many have seen. the whole situation was blown way out of proportion, and didn't need to be as big as it turned out for the comment that was made. i personally never thought what @bernardsbendystraws said was the worst thing i'd seen the night that i made that post, but it became the main focus of the conversation because i had reached out trying to explain how i had already seen others upset by the small comment, and she was triggered by it. she's entitled to have her own opinion and emotions on the topic, but i was bothered by how my words and intentions were being completely misconstrued.

i admit, i definitely should've just ignored it, but seeing as i pride myself on being an honest person, getting accused of being otherwise was getting under my skin. there were even times that i would post something with the thought in mind that it'd be my last because i no longer saw any point in arguing, and then i'd get upset all over again by the response. although i defended myself in the most mature way i could, i recognize that not responding at all would've been better. i'm not a hateful person, and i feel as even though i tried to come at it with a good heart, what i posted made it seem like i wanted to spread negativity. for that, i'm sorry.

still, i'm not sorry for saying what i did in my original post, as i feel as though the respect is still needed. although the topic of conversation was about religion because that was the most recent problem, i believe it stands for many other things within this fandom if we would like to keep a strong and healthy community. this goes for things like gender, sexual orientation, race, ect. not just religion. respect is so crucial.

hate :

i was notified after responding to some of the things in my inbox, there were people sending @muwapsturniolo, a beautiful black woman, disgusting, racist asks on my behalf. i, myself am exactly half black, but even if i weren't, i've made it very clear that i don't stand for racism, homophobia, ableism, and more in my 'about me' post pinned on my page. i'm still not quite sure how to respond to the disgusting things i saw being left in peaches' inbox, as i'm in utter disbelief that someone would have the audacity to do that and claim it was to defend me. first off, i didn't need defending, and definitely not if the only way you can 'defend' someone is by sending them the most disrespectful, hurtful things i think i've ever seen in my life.

i had taken the anons i was getting as mere support, but am now recognizing that within that support, there was a lot of bashing of another person, despite me claiming i wouldn't tolerate that. it was 100% my mistake. me, peaches, and rose clearly weren't happy with each other, and i would say still really aren't, but nowhere within our drama did that give anyone the right to say what they did to peaches. she simply didn't deserve it.

aftermath :

this situation is over with. i stand on what i said about respect, rose is done talking about it, and peaches is continuing on with her break, hopefully in peace. i've never been in tumblr drama before, and i don't plan on being in any more, but that doesn't mean i won't stand up for what's right. hopefully, if needed, in full private.

i see all of the things still in my inbox that show genuine support, and i'm forever grateful. i also see all of the stories from people who feel like they've finally been given a voice after they've had problems with rose, and i'm not here to silence them. i will no longer be responding to those anons, but keep in mind that this doesn't mean i don't agree with some of the points that have been made in them. i won't be entertaining the hate whatsoever, but if you feel the need to speak to someone about a problem you're having in the community, even if it's not worded in the most respectful way possible, my inbox is always open. i'll read, but won't be posting, or giving my own opinion on it

still, i don't want to be seen as some hero for doing/saying what i felt was right, nor do i want to be seen as a victim to this drama. i'm happy to have seen that so many people agree with me, as it makes me feel as though most people in this fandom do have basic respect, which could be grounds for building such a healthy environment.

i will actually no longer be posting about the drama with rose and peaches whatsoever, and be going back to doing what my blog was made for, writing. i encourage others to stop posting about it too, as we don't need more opinions put in on our problems, and all i've wanted was a more understanding + respectful community.

-love, your grandma cvnty ☆!

[jalenay]

Nothing's Wrong with Dale - Publishing Update May 4 2024

So my work work is starting to relax - it'll be 'normal' working hours after May 15, but i'm manifesting some early additional free time (by ignoring some of the things i still have left to do) and i thought i'd give an update on my current NWWD plan to fill you guys in (if anyone wants to know) and to motivate myself to, you know, do it.

let me know what you think and if you have any questions! or if there's anything else you want to know!

So the overall plan is as follows:

First Rough Edit - this is basically just changing the POV from 2nd POV to 3rd POV. This is very tedious and currently what I'm doing right now. I'm also making a list as I go for high level updates/changes i want to make. Just thinking about the story as a whole and what tweaks i want to make now that the whole thing is finally done (primarily moving exposition around, if there's anything extra i can remove, timing of when certain things are discussed, and so on).

My Main Edit - this will be more time consuming but probably more fun as i do my main revise and edit of the story as a whole. i'll likely print the entire story out, make edits on hard copy, and then type up all the edits. I will also probably be sending the updated chapters to my main beta, for her opinion. (this would be the person i first texted about Dale in Dec 2021, she deserves first look lol)

Editor - After I'm happy with what I've done, i'll send the entire thing over to my editors, the main ones who worked on DSM. This will likely take a good amount of time (DSM took one month) but in many ways involves less effort from me lol. Just nerves.

Cover, Self-publishing Details - while my editors have the manuscript, I'll be narrowing down what I want the cover to look like and hiring a cover artist. (i've got a short list of artists right now, but i'll probably continue to refine that). I'm bad a visualizing covers and so this will be hard for me, although i have some basic ideas. i'll need to gather reference photos too and then work with the artist. I also want to publish more widely than just Amazon and will hopefully get DSM out to other places as well as a test run before NWWD. Look into more marketing? This is the most miscellaneous of the steps.

Process Edits - actually go through all the edits and notes given to me by my editor. This takes a lot of time (and is mentally taxing - no one likes to read pages of people telling you what you need to fix about what you wrote even if its overall extremely helpful and necessary)

Finalizing - I'll send the edited version to my first beta and another ARC reader/friend. I'll work on the formatting for the book. Coordinating where it will be published and when.

Publishing!

This is a loose list of steps that I mostly defined right now, but are similar to what i did with DSM. As i said, I'm in step one, currently just finished Chapter 25 of 36 of that rough edit.

I'll try to provide some updates on the process at it moves along, if people are interested in hearing about that. I'll most likely keep those updates on this blog, along with any other publishing specific commentary. if any one has any questions or thoughts on the whole thing, please feel free to send them to this blog or comment on this post.

I'm very excited to really dig into publishing NWWD and looking forward to sharing it with you!

Thanks to everyone for all their support - I wouldn't even be considering this (i probably wouldn't have even had a finished draft) with you!

[p-redux]

So, apparently there's a shitshow brewing because allegedly Sam's latest date, Alice Panikian DMed with a couple of fans. Before I continue, here's a refresher of my previous post, showing Sam Heughan and Alice Panikian attending the Giorgio Armani Tennis Classic in London this weekend. 👇

Well, I'd heard in a few DMs that allegedly some DMs were circulating showing that some fans DMed Alice Panikian even before she was seen with Sam. I guess they noticed Sam was following her. The fans proceeded to DM Alice to ask questions about Sam and she allegedly replied. I didn't pay much attention because that's not the first time that's happened in this fandom. Fans have been messaging Sam's dates for ten years. Nothing new. Usually, it's to harass them, sometimes to show support. Many of the women don't answer but some definitely have. Again, nothing new.

Then, I got a DM from someone I've never talked to before and she tells me she's seen the screencaps of the Alice DM's, and she's very upset about them. She was upset because Alice gave info about how she met Sam, their plans, and then she talked crap about Sam's fans, and said Sam did too. Again, I didn't think anything of it because IT'S NOT THE FIRST TIME. I guess for newer fans, it was a shock. Anyhoo, I asked her to show me the screencaps of Alice's DMs with the promise that I wouldn't post them publicly and I wouldn't post her name. Well, I'm keeping my promise, so I'm not going to post them. And just so that people who have seen them know I have also seen them, here's a quote from one of Alice's DM's, "Oh so this was a trap from his weird fans." If anyone still has a doubt, I'd be more than happy to offer other direct quotes. I've seen the DMs. Trust.

So, here's my take. Same shit, different year. There is NOTHING NEW in the Alice DM's. Nothing I haven't shared with the fandom for ten years.

Quick summary: Sam slides into beautiful women's DM's on social media. Check. Sam sends and receives pics. Check BTW, that's everyone that's out there dating and also some married people. Sexy pics are the norm. Again, nothing new. Sam tells a woman he wants to see her, invites her to fly out to meet him. Check. Helloooo, he's rich, famous, and gorgeous. OF COURSE, he's going to fly out dates. Who would say no? Not I, my friends, not I. Sam's hater fans or SamCait shippers slide into newest woman's DM's to get the scoop about Sam or to leave hateful messages. Check. Same as it ever was. Woman responds and shares how excited she is to be with Sam, their plans etc., not realizing she's being tricked, and her DM's will be blasted all over the fandom. Check, check check. Then woman, if she's feisty, reacts to defend herself, and tells fans they're basically crazy, she thinks so, and so does Sam. Again, check, check, check. Anyone who's been here long enough has seen this same scenario play out over and over again.

The above is basically what is contained in the DM's between Alice and the fans. So, back to what I said in my previous post. Does Sam hate his fans? NO. He doesn't hate his normal fans. However, the so called fans, aka SamCait shippers, ex-shippers, now turned Sam hates, THOSE "fans," aka bullies, THOSE fans, he doesn't like so much. AND WITH GOOD REASON. There are many things my insider sources have told me that I haven't shared publicly. One of the things I don't put out there too often is that Sam HAS said his bully fans who have made his life miserable, and the lives of any woman he's dated miserable, are to quote him "mental." That's British for "crazy." AND HE IS NOT WRONG.

So, that's it. Big Whoop. Sam is dating a hot woman, they're into each other, they plan to see each other some more, Sam's warned her about his crazy fans, not all his fans, just his crazy ones, she got curious when she received DM's from these fans she was warned about, and proceeded to defend herself. I literally don't see one thing wrong with this. Good for her and good for Sam.

So, if you're pissed off by what she said in her DM's, then you're one of the "mental" fans Sam warned her about. If you're cheering them both on, then you're one of the sane fans, and Sam definitely loves and appreciates you. Again, I know this with 100% certainty because one degree of separation insider sources have told me this directly over the years.

As an aside, it is also possible the DMs are fake, I don't know how to do it, but I know there are lots of apps that can produce fake DM's. So, for now, I would take it with a grain of salt. But, I actually hope they're real. Serves as a reminder that Sam does think SamCait shippers, ex-shippers, and Sam haters are "mental," since they HAVE harassed him for years. His supportive fans, he adores. Trust. That's all, folks.

[canon-vi]

What if? What if Tasya was a character in Sora? Oh yeah, thanks to TikTok for inspiring songs

--------------------------💠----------------------------

•

Also blames Dream for her mother's death, but doesn't show it, and no matter how much she blames him, she still stays close to him and loves him

•

Reaches out to Pallete, feels a resemblance to herself in him and sincerely believes him

•

Doesn't believe Lux, pretends to believe, but does the opposite

•

Says everything straight to your face with a stupid look (she understands everything)

•

While the original Taisiya is "I see no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil, guys", this Taisiya is "I saw everything, I heard everything and I will tell you all"

•

She calls Nightmare not her father, but her uncle

•

This Taisiya is happy to wear all sorts of witch outfits, she always dresses as a witch for all sorts of events that involve costumes

•

She is trying hard to become a witch, she reads every book where witches are mentioned by at least some third generation of the author's great-grandfather's grandmother

--------------------------💠----------------------------

Dream:

Yes, he is guilty, yes, he is bad both as a husband and as a father, but I will still love him, he... He is trying, okay? Enough, just enough of all this...

Nadezhda:

Hope... Uncle told me that Mom is in heaven and what he did for her to go there... I think Mom really deserves to rest up there, and those who think otherwise - let them burn in hell

Ink:

Brother Pallete and sister Drop's mom... Well.. I don't know what I can say about her... But I see how she tries, really, it's just... I like Miss Killer's company more...

Nightmare:

Uncle often scolds dad and just as often talks about mom, and only good things, after his story about what he did to send mom to heaven, I started thinking about who loves mom more, dad or uncle...

Alphonse:

Brother Callisto, Brother Pallete, Mr. Merciless, Sister Drop, Miss Artemis, Dad, Uncle, Miss Killer... agh... well, EVERYONE says he's bad, but for some reason he treats me well... I'd rather trust everyone and not go near him

Killer:

I really like listening to her, she's very beautiful and her voice is very pleasant!! Well, sometimes the stories that Miss Killer tells me I already know, but it doesn't matter! I will listen to her forever

Cross:

He gives me free treats and who am I not to take them? And Miss Killer speaks highly of him, so I think he's a good guy

Reaper:

What Uncle did was horrible, but I hope Mr. Death knows it was worth it...

Geno:

I probably won't be able to look her in the eye with a clear conscience, after all, because of me Uncle tortured her daughter...

Angst (Dead):

I heard from Uncle that he's very annoying and... Dead child...

Callisto:

Brother Callisto is the best older brother, and anyone who disagrees can go to hell, because you can't go against facts, and the fact that Callisto is the best older brother.

Crescent:

I... I really try to go to church, it's just... I can't help my sensitivity, the smell makes me sick there...

Merciless:

Sister Lux's fiancé... I don't know him that well, we avoid each other, I don't know what to say about him

Lux:

"Did you know that if you cut your hair, it will grow faster??" If it weren't for Brother Callisto, I would have cut her hair, but I don't want Callisto to scold me for it... so I just nod, agree and don't do it...

Pallete:

I try to support my brother as best I can, maybe I'm not doing it well, but at least I try, the company of him and little sister Drop is much better than the company of sister Lux and loneliness, I hope my imposition will not make our relationship worse...

Goth:

I feel awkward looking her in the eye just like I did in front of Miss Geno, but what can I do? Brother Pallete is her friend, so we have to see each other

Drop:

Sister Drop is very cute! But I can't understand her love for Mr. Merciless, he's already taken, he's in love with sister Lux, but I'll still teach my sister some manners!

Bonus:

Albedo:

He dares to think that he can go against the king and my with Callisto will , I'd rather move to Miss Killer than to him!

PaperJam:

I have an uncle with Miss Killer and Ink instead of a mom, I get enough love and care, but she and her brother still continue their tirade about depriving dad of parental rights.

Gradient:

Only Brother Callisto and Brother Pallete can hit dad! He dared to hit a member of the royal family! In Uncle's time, he would have been executed for this on the spot! He should be glad that dad is mercifull!

Angst (alive):

He once brought me a book about witchcraft and such... I don't want to know where and how he found them, but I am very grateful to him!

Artemis:

I try to distract her from my appearance, I put on glasses, change my hairstyle, dress differently, I like to walk with her and cook

--------------------------💠----------------------------

--------------------------💠----------------------------

E. L. A. by pretty Rose 🌹 @anotherrosesthatfell

Sunflower in full bloom au by pretty Cherry 🍒 @cherriesandbonbons / @purplesunflowerz

[hasaniwalker]

Trying

I posted this on my kickstarter, but thought others should hear it. I'm still working, but it's very hard at this time.

Hello everyone,

Sorry to get perhaps a bit personal, I try not to, but I'm not doing great today and probably won't for a while. But I am still working on rewards. Some of you will be getting shirts and tote bags soon. I ordered some books, first as proof and then I'll order the bulk. Other items have been printed and are waiting for the books to ship with.

I'm going to try to promote this still, but it's certainly hard to really get moving on it. I feel like stories I want to tell, stories with mainly women as the main characters, stories about compassion, adversity and working through tough times with love and empathy for others. I feel like I keep finding out that there are a great amount of people in the world who actively hate all those aspects and feverishly work against them. In a since, It's like trying to write a Christmas Carol, but knowing that many not only hate the message but would much rather see it reversed. With Scrooge going from a sympathetic giving person to a shrill business man putting money over everything.

I rambling. Sorry, I have a lot on my mind and none of it is good. My spirit is unfortunately very low. I love creating stories and characters. I see art as an extension of the soul that you can share with others. I also like showing the emotion and care I'd like to see in the world. I make monsters so they can be conquered or understood. I show characters with flaws and tragic pasts so they can overcome them. I write to show paths to a better place. I always believed you should give your characters what they need in the end, not what they want. Give them what they need to have a happier life, to find peace, to become better for themselves and others. 

It's becoming exhausting to tell these stories in a world that constantly looks past these qualities. However, I do greatly appreciate the support all of you gave this story. And the support some of you give on my other platforms. It's inspiring, even if the news tells me that many would rather not see these ideas.

In any case, Thank you to all of you. rewards are being sent out, and with the books submitted for print, they've actually shown up for preorder. I'll start letting people know about the preorder. Again, it's odd and difficult to get the word out on anything right now. As though every step and type requires a pep talk to get me to do anything.

You can see the Barnes and Noble preorder listing here. depending on when the books arrive, I may send the digital book first as an advanced copy if anyone cares to post an early review.

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/the-hundred-acre-kingdom-hasani-walker/1146510245?ean=9780990687948

I'm still going, but it's all just a little slow now.

Thank you again,

Hasani

[linkemon]

Vivi (Baji Keisuke x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you’re interested.

Other oneshots can be found here.

[ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ] ᴄᴏᴍᴇꜱ ᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴄʟᴜꜱɪᴏɴ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ꜱʜᴇ ꜰᴇʟʟ ɪɴ ʟᴏᴠᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʙᴀᴊɪ ᴋᴇɪꜱᴜᴋᴇ. ꜱʜᴇ ʙᴇɢɪɴꜱ ᴛᴏ ꜱᴘᴇɴᴅ ᴍᴏʀᴇ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪᴍ, ᴏɴʟʏ ᴛᴏ ꜰɪɴᴀʟʟʏ ꜰɪɴᴅ ᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ɴᴏᴛʜɪɴɢ ɪꜱ ᴀꜱ ꜱʜᴇ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ…

ᴀᴅᴅɪᴛɪᴏɴᴀʟ ɪɴꜰᴏʀᴍᴀᴛɪᴏɴ: 1. ᴏɴᴇꜱʜᴏᴛ ᴛᴀᴋᴇꜱ ᴘʟᴀᴄᴇ ɪɴ ᴛʜᴇ ꜰɪʀꜱᴛ ꜱᴇᴀꜱᴏɴ ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴇʀᴇꜰᴏʀᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴛᴀɪɴꜱ ꜱᴘᴏɪʟᴇʀꜱ.

[Reader] looked around the library. Dust particles danced in the bright light streaming from the huge windows. Some students fought over access to computers. The teacher on duty tried to calm them down. Most people, however, sat quietly, with their noses in books. They were cramming for exams. Two people glanced her way quickly from time to time. That's why she always hid in that corner, away from watchful eyes. The rumors about meeting Baji outside of class didn't do her any good. No one close to her approved of this. They heard various things about him, often untrue. They were afraid and rightly so.  

She looked at her notebook again that afternoon. She did all her homework. She also managed to study for all the tests. She had nothing left. She tapped her fingers impatiently on the table. She was dying of boredom. How long can you do one exercise? Keisuke has proven to her many times that there are people in the world who are not suitable for mathematics. No matter how much she tutored him, he was hopeless. Many times she wanted to give up but then she remembered his mother. Mrs. Baji fell into despair after her son had to repeat a grade. She didn't want it to happen again, so she actually begged her young neighbour to do something about his hopeless state of knowledge. She didn't have much money but she often cooked her favourite dishes and invited her to dinner. To this day, the girl still doesn't know how she managed to make up for all the gaps in the boy's education. The worst thing was that he really tried. She supervised him at every opportunity. Sometimes, late at night, she saw the lamp on in his room. And yet, he simply couldn't stick certain things in his mind forever.  

— What strategy did you use? — [Reader] asked, wanting to break the silence. She couldn't sit like this forever.  

— None — Keisuke coughed. — I don't know how to start this task.  

— Why didn't you say anything?! — The girl ran her hand over her face resignedly.  

— You seemed deep in thought — he replied calmly.  

— Take off those glasses. Right now.

She couldn't look at the pair of glasses on his nose anymore. Not only did he not look like himself but his eyesight was also ruined. The guys in the gang told him that if he put them on, he would become smarter. It didn't really work. And certainly not when it comes to school.  

— What for? — he asked.  

She reached towards him. He had more beautiful hair than herself. She admitted it reluctantly. He wore his long black locks in a ponytail. She pulled the elastic band off, letting them fall freely. He looked very handsome. If he walked like this every day, many students would surely send him love letters. Maybe it was better that only she had the privilege of seeing him like this...  

— Standard tactics don't work on you — she said. — When you're getting ready for a fight, you look like you do now. Imagine that these exercises are enemies and you're about to kick their ass.  

— How do you know what I look like when I fight? — Baji grinned. — Someone is watching me...  

— First of all, I'd be a fool not to look at you. — The boy's reaction was priceless. For a moment he was completely confused. He wasn't used to anyone responding to him like that. Certainly not apart from the people of Tokyo Manji. — And secondly, focus. — She pointed to the notebook.  

He cracked his neck and clenched his fist. For a moment, he looked like he was really about to go and kick the young students a few shelves away. Eventually, however, he began to read the text eagerly. He used two large sheets of paper. He drew and scribbled furiously. After a few minutes of scribbling, he gave girl the exercise. It's true that he calculated the delta incorrectly but it was a start. Especially compared to what was before.  

— If I do the next task, will you give me a kiss? — His low, gravelly voice sounded somewhere close to her ear.  

She knew he was teasing her but it still felt nice. He didn't joke like that with everyone. Keisuke didn't allow women near him at all. Outside of her. And she was very flattered to be the exception.  

— We both know you won't do it — She leaned towards him.  

The academic level of difficulty was clearly marked with the exercise. While she would have had a chance against it, he would almost certainly have failed at the very start.  

— I was hoping you'd care enough to help me. — He laughed. — It's time for me — he announced, getting up from the table.  

Toman was probably going to the meeting again. He'll put on a black jacket, get on his bike and go give someone a good beating. It never really scared her. Yes, he could be brutal but he never attacked people who didn't know what they were getting into. She had seen him deal with guys who harassed girls at school more than once. He often saved his younger colleagues from being attacked by nasty bullies. He didn't brag about it at all. He did it after class. Usually, no one recognized him afterward anyway because he looked very different at school and outside of it.  

It was no exaggeration to say that she had fallen in love with Baji. He showed her his other, softer side. Like when he held her hair to keep it from falling into the bowl of ramen. Or when he helped her get to class on time because she overslept. And he once even said that if he had to choose one girl and go on a date, it would be [Reader]. The latter was an overheard conversation between him and Chifuyu. Somehow it turned out that she was just returning to her apartment. The boys sometimes liked to sit on the playground near the estate. It was then that the truth dawned on her. It wasn't flirting anymore, it was something else. Some kind of bond that they will probably develop into something more soon. She enjoyed it.  

She didn't even notice how much time she spent in the library.  

— [Reader]-chan, have you been sitting here all afternoon? — Her friend touched her arm gently.  

— Almost — the girl nodded.  

Sashimi had been very worried about her lately. She insisted on walking her home. She also often asked them to go out together. She didn't mind, although the frequency with which they did it was starting to tire her a little. In the end, though, [Reader] let her be dragged and they had a good time.  

— I thought you were just talking to someone... — Her friend looked worried.  

She probably guessed she spent time with Baji. She didn't want to upset her because Sashimi never liked the boy. She had formed an opinion about him a long time ago. Gangs were bad, dangerous and that's it. She would go even crazier knowing that this famous legend goes to the same school.  

— You must've misheard. — [Reader] waved her hand carelessly and put her things into her bag. — Let's go.  

***  

Something banged hard on the window. [Reader] took off her headphones, trying to figure out if she had misheard. The autumn wind sometimes blew a lot of garbage towards her house. Especially on days like this, where the sky looked like it was going to rain any moment.  

And yet the sound repeated itself. So she went to the window. She didn't expect to see Keisuke on the other side of the glass at all. A fat black tomcat trotted next to him. He wagged his tail impatiently and mewed loudly. He certainly didn't like this weather.  

— How did you get here, Baji-kun? — The girl glanced at him and then down.  

She let him inside, feeling the cool breeze of the approaching storm.  

— I climbed the tree. — He dusted the small brown leaves off his jacket.  

— Where did you leave the motorbike? — She glanced out the window again. There was no sign of his beloved vehicle anywhere.  

— One street away. Don't worry, I'm not that stupid. I know your folks don't like me.  

She breathed a sigh of relief. Her parents didn't like the boy. They certainly wouldn't be happy to see him. Recently, they clearly reminded their daughter that it was not a good idea to associate with such people. She protested for a long time and eventually they reached a compromise. However, she decided to stay out of their sight for now when the two of them are together. A sudden meeting certainly wouldn't improve the situation now.  

— You mentioned you weren't feeling well, so I came. — Keisuke sat down on the soft, plush carpet. He lazily stretched his legs and turned his head towards the ceiling.  

[Reader] widened her eyes. She had indeed written him a message but the last time she checked, he had not read it or replied. She thought he wouldn't really care. After all, everyone can have a bad day sometimes. Meanwhile, he escaped from the meeting with the gang. In addition, he made this strange but impressive entrance. She felt stupid. She was wearing unsophisticated, crumpled clothes and funny, old-fashioned slippers. She furtively brushed her hair as he admired the photos in her room, just to look a little more put together.  

— Cool slippies. Do you feel like a grandma already? — Her friend grinned.  

He seemed genuinely amused by the concept of stuffed cats on her feet.  

— Says the guy who wore glasses and thought they would make him smarter... — [Reader] showed him the middle finger.  

She felt embarrassed. Not that she didn't like wearing those slippers but now her neighbour certainly wouldn't let her live. He definitely won't miss the opportunity to remind her about it during some tutoring.  

— I thought if I brought him back it would make you feel better — Baji nodded at the animal hanging out in the middle of the room.  

The fat cat put his head under the girl's hand. She took him onto her lap. She stroked the fluffy ball steadily. The black fur was extremely soft. Baji certainly brushed it. She knew that the boy dealt with stray cats. He devoted what little time he had left from the day to taking care of them. His mother complained about how much fur they left in his room. And also what part of the monthly budget they consume. But she could always be placated. All it took was the pleading looks of a few animals and the promise that her son would start studying. Everything had been going on this way for several years. There were no signs of change.  

There was something nice about sitting here with Keisuke in the warmth when it was starting to rain outside. Talking about trivial matters brought peace of mind. Even if they didn't cover any specific topics. His mere presence helped cheer her up.  

— Why exactly did you feel bad today? — Baji asked at one point. — Do I need to beat someone up?  

She saw in his eyes that he was asking seriously. If someone actually hurt her, he would be ready to go and hit whoever she pointed out. He probably wouldn't even ask what, how or why.  

— You don't have to hit anyone. She laughed. After a while, however, she sighed heavily. — I've just had a terrible headache lately and I'm not in a good mood. There is no specific reason.  

The boy looked at her carefully, then put his hand to her forehead and immediately took it away.  

— What are you doing? — [Reader] looked at him, amused.

— I'm checking for a fever — he said.

She put her hand to her mouth to stifle a giggle. Still, she snorted quietly. She couldn't help herself.  

— You wouldn't be able to check anything by swatting your hand like that! Have you watched some kind of romantic movies?

His face confirmed that yes, he had watched the them. As silly as it was, it was also a bit romantic. Therefore, she spared him further suffering and changed the topic of conversation.  

A black kitten was circling the room. At first he acted normal but then he became a bit uncomfortable. He walked around in circles, unable to find a place.  

— What is it about? — The girl scratched him behind the ears.  

— He probably misses me — Keisuke said.  

As if on cue, the animal began to meow. A long wail echoed through the room.  

— [Reader], is that a cat? I thought you were talking to someone. — Her mother's voice came from the living room.  

She was probably watching TV and the sound only now reached her ears.  

— It's just a new ringtone on your phone! — the daughter shouted. — I talked to Sashimi!  

She looked pointedly at her guest. They should have been in bed long ago. Tomorrow was another day at school.  

— I think it's time for me to go — Baji said, straightening his jacket.  

She opened the window. The cat jumped out first, even though it was already starting to rain outside. He meowed goodbye and jumped straight into the tree. Keisuke followed him.  

***  

[Reader] was walking along a quiet street with Baji. The area was desolate. Few people were out this late in the evening. And certainly not in November. However, the starry sky encouraged them to continue walking. So she pulled her jacket tighter around her, trailing after the boy.  

At one point, she saw a familiar, blond hair. It stood out in the grey-brown landscape. The light from the lamps reflected from it from a distance.  

— Matsuno-kouhai! — she exclaimed.  

The younger colleague turned towards her. Keiji gave her a scolding look. It was supposed to be just the two of them. And now they will have company.  

— Good evening, [Reader]-san… — Chifuyu's face showed concern. He stood still for a moment, as if he didn't know what to say. — How do you feel?  

He had always been formal with her but probably not that formal. She suspected that he had a crush on her some time ago. However, he felt respect for Baji and that was probably why he tried to suppress his feelings. Since she realized this, she saw him less often. She didn't want to break his heart even more.

— All right. Thanks for asking, although it's a rather strange question. — The older friend smiled slightly.  

— You took it the worst of all of us and it seemed to me that… — The unfinished sentence hung in the air.  

She noticed with horror that tears were dancing in the corners of kouhai's eyes. He lowered his head and quickly wiped them away.  

— What are you talking about? — asked the girl. She felt like she was missing something. As if it was something she should know.  

She looked at Keiji. However, he shrugged. Apparently he had no idea what was going on either.  

— I don't think we understand what you're talking about.  

— We don't? — The boy looked at her with surprise. He seemed genuinely shocked.  

— Something's wrong? We have no idea. We were here all evening. — She gave him a worried look.  

— [Reader]-senpai, what what kind of we are you talking about? — he asked with a serious expression.  

— Me and Baji-kun. Who else do you see here?  

Chifuyu's eyes widened for a moment. Like he really couldn't believe something. She didn't understand at all why he had this reaction. He grabbed her shoulders tightly and shook her.  

— [Reader]-senpai, Baji-san is dead…  

She felt as if someone had hit her. She grabbed her head. Excruciating pain ripped through her skull. As if something was trying to come to the surface. Everything inside her was turning over. She felt like vomiting.  

— But... he's here...  

She wanted to say that he was still here but when she looked back, she saw no one. Only an empty sidewalk and a few rustling leaves.  

— He was here just a moment ago! — she shouted desperately, looking around.  

She looked fat the boy in disbelief, feeling something bursting in her head. Some fragments of memories seemed to deform and blur. Was he in the library with her? Did he come to her room? Was she walking with him just now? 

— He committed suicide. Less than a week ago. On Bloody Halloween — Chifuyu said in a quiet, pained voice. — You were with me at his funeral. You are standing in front of a cemetery. — Matsuno hugged her tightly.  

She looked uncertainly to her right. He was right. Her legs brought her here. There was a gate in front of her. And beyond, there were rows of tombstones, decorated with flowers and incense sticks. Slowly everything came back to her. The sight of his cold, lifeless body. A gentle smile on his face as she said her final goodbyes to the corpse. His mother's despair as he was cremated. These senseless condolences from all my loved ones. As if they were going to bring him back to life.  

— It's not true! — she protested.  

She sobbed. His black jacket was darkened by the tears that dripped profusely down her face. She felt snotty. She sniffled again and again. The lights of the lamps were blurring more and more. The boy pulled her towards him. He held her very tightly and she knew he was crying too, although more quietly. She howled with shock and anger. To the world for being so damn unfair. At herself for not noticing anything. At Baji for leaving and not thinking about how she and his mother would feel. At Hanemiya because he was the one who pushed him to do this. And also on Tokyo Manji because they were shitty friends. Everyone was guilty. And now there was nothing that could be done about it because there was no way to turn back time.  

She blinked hard. She thought she saw Keiji for a brief moment. With his cheeky smile, on a motorbike and a black cat next to him.  

— Don't go — she sobbed.

***  

[Reader] took out Peyoung Yakisoba from the bag and handed Chifuyu the chopsticks. They ate in silence. This became their ritual. Ever since their friend left, they kept their promise. They left him his favourite dish according to his last wish. They emptied the package halfway and then placed it on the monument. They hoped he would like it. 

The woman extended her hand towards Matsuno. He grabbed her and squeezed it tightly. They didn't give up. Even though everyone around seemed to have come to terms with Baji's death. They were still working. With each passing day they were getting closer to getting rid of Kisaki. Revenge became, as it were, their driving force. And yet, somewhere in these negative feelings, there was also room for love. 

For a long time, they wondered what Keiji would say if he saw their relationship. He would probably laugh and say he was jealous. But then he would wish them luck. She knew it. If it weren't for this feeling, they certainly wouldn't have decided to do all this.  

She had support in the man walking by her side. He understood her better than anyone else.  

— So where are we going for dinner today? — [Reader] asked.  

— I have no idea. There will probably be a lot of food at the board meeting but I wouldn't want to eat at the same table with them. We'll figure something out when I get back. — Matsuno wrapped his arms around her waist and they moved towards the tall building towering over the entire city.  

[waratah-moon]

Super Like 3 • Eddie Munson

part 1 - part 2 - part 3

I'm in love with modern!twitch streamer Eddie...

The first date

Parkway Flea Market, Indianapolis

Liked by eddiethebanished, yourfriend and 163 others yourusername They didn't have any Dio 😢

eddiethebanished So mad. At least they had Kool & The Gang. ↳ yourusername Now if anyone ever asks to hear Get Down On It I can tell them I have it on vinyl

yourfriend Love the new ring ↳ yourusername It was a present 🥰

2 months in...

Liked by lucas.sinclair, yourfriend and 14,752 others eddiethebanished She's coming for my job

yourusername Yes can I finally stream the Sims 4 on your channel? ↳ madmax I'll watch ↳ dustin_h Might finally get some good content

eddiefan Dude please don't let your girlfriend stream. Girls can't game. ↳ eddiethebanished wtf are you 12? Go to bed dude.

3 months in...

Liked by robs_buckley, eddiethebanished and 194 others yourinstagram You know you're down bad when you start doing arts and crafts

yourfriend This is too cute 🥺 ↳ yourusername We're sickening 🥺

eddiethebanished Love keeping a piece of you in my pocket 💖 ↳ dustin_h You're such a sap ↳ eddiethebanished Shut up dustybuns

5 months in...

Hawkins, Indiana

Liked by yourfriend, robs_buckley and 20,472 others eddiethebanished Took my girl back to my hometown for the weekend and showed her the one sight.

steve.harrington So you took her to Lover's Lake? ↳ eddiethebanished Skull Rock actually. Then Lover's Lake. Then your mom's house ↳ steve.harrington Jokes on you my mom moved to Florida. ↳ eddiethebanished I knew joking about your parents would end up being too sad, sorry bro. I'll call you later. ↳ steve.harrington I'd actually really appreciate that.

dustin_h It was so good to finally meet you yourusername ↳ yourusername You too dustin_h I love the campaign you wrote!

8 months in...

Liked by yourfriend, yourotherfriend and 210 others yourusername Asked him to learn some Harry Styles... still waiting.

mikewheeler I still have the video of when he played 5 Seconds of Summer at Steve's birthday ↳ steve.harrington I remember that! He rocked She Looks So Perfect ↳ yourusername omg please send it to me ↳ eddiethebanished Don't you dare ↳ mikewheeler Check your messages

10 months in...

Liked by robs_buckley, nancywheeler and 54,920 others eddiethebanished smoking hot date

robs_buckley I thought you were quitting! ↳ yourinstagram I'm trying!!! ↳ eddiethebanished She's doing better than me.

nancywheeler We need a girls night soon xx robs_buckley yourinstagram ↳ yourinstagram Text me next time you're in town! ↳ robs_buckley I second this!

eddiefan your girlfriend is hot

1 year in...

Liked by steve.harrington, willthewise and 3,458 others yourusername My golden retriever gamer boy ❤️ I'll tell you all the sappy shit in person so Dustin can't make fun of us. Love you Eds.

eddiethebanished Love you more than life itself baby girl ❤️ ↳ Liked by yourusername

dustin_h You guys are actually very cute, but thanks for keeping the sap level to a minimum. ↳ Liked by yourusername and eddiethebanished

robs_buckley I want what you have 🥺 ↳ yourinstagram I keep telling you I have the perfect person for you ↳ robs_buckley Fiiiiiiiiiiine. Set it up. ↳ yourinstagram YES

1 year and couple months in...

Liked by steve.harrington, mikewheeler and 129,327 others eddiethebanished I finally cracked over 1 million followers on twitch and enough subs to quit my day job and make a living playing video games. How batshit insane is that? Thank you to everyone who ever supported me, no matter how long you've been here... one day, since day one, thank you. I also couldn't have done it without my wonderful girlfriend, yourusername. Without you I would never have had the courage to turn this nerdy little passion into my dream job. Now on to the future, whatever that may hold. I hope you'll all join me for the ride.

yourusername So proud of you Eds. ↳ eddiethebanished Couldn't have done it without you.

dustin_h Absolutely insane dude! Congratulations. ↳ Liked by eddiethebanished

eddiefan Congratulations Eddie!

eddiefan Been subbed since the shitty battlestation, glad you've finally upgraded! ↳ Liked by eddiethebanished and yourusername

1 year and some months in...

Liked by robs_buckley, yourfriend and 174,294 others eddiethebanished You know she loves you when she does a 70s themed photoshoot for your shitty band's new album cover. Ps new music dropping soon corrodedcoffin 📸 filmbyjbyers

yourusername What can I say, I'm obsessed with the front man. ↳ Liked by eddiethebanished

filmbyjbyers The photos turned out great! ↳ Liked by eddiethebanished and yourinstagram

dustin_h Aw your band's not that shitty ↳ eddiethebanished thanks Dustin

eddiefan You're finally releasing a full length album? ↳ eddiethebanished Maaaaybe...

About 2 years in...

Liked by yourfriend, filmbyjbyers and 6759 others yourusername We saw Metallica live then got super drunk... also we're engaged!

robs_buckley Um excuse me? ↳ yourinstagram Surprise? I'm calling you now.

steve.harrington dustin_h Did you know this? ↳ dustin_h Eddie facetimed me at 3 in the morning so yeah I knew lol ↳ eddiethebanished Sorry man, but at least you found out first? ↳ dustin_h I'm so happy for you both I couldn't care less that you woke me up ❤️

-

🎂 join my birthday week celebration! 🎂 < happening until 29/1/23 masterlist / send me a message 💌 / Steve's version

disclaimer! pinterest is full of white girls. I'm sorry but it's true. I tried to keep y/n as nondescript as possible but I'm just working with what I had. Sorry in advance if that offends anyone but this can be an exercise in imagination. - (not tagging my full tag list, just the people who commented on part 1 and 2… My tag list is reserved for full length fics!) @emma77645 @dylanmunson @bakugouswh0r3 @tlclick73

[wishing-stones]

Hii,,, hope I'm not bothering you too much. I've been a really big fan of your writing for a couple of months now. You don't have to respond to my ask if it makes you uncomfortable, I understand.

I'm someone who easily falls into paranoia spirals, and constantly second guesses whether my behaviour is socially appropriate since I have such a hard time reading a room. I have a habit of unknowingly stepping over the line when I get excited and thus making people uncomfortable, and only being aware of it if I'm directly confronted about it? Though because I absolutely hate conflict I often distance/isolate myself from the people I'm close to and find myself forming deeper emotional attachments to stuffed animals than people.

Would the guys find this to be a problem? Would they particularly care about someone being more open to an inanimate object than them, or if they need to regularly switch between reminding the person of boundaries and assurance that they aren't a selfish or awful person?

(Again, feel free to ignore this if you don't want to respond, I won't get upset if this ask gets deleted for being too much)

- 🖍 crayanon

Okay first of all Crayanon is adorable

Secondly, sending me asks is in no way bothering me! If I don't have the time or energy to respond to them, I often sit on them until I do (or until I come up with a sufficient answer for some of them). The only ones I wind up deleting are the ones I legitimately don't have an answer to LOL.

Thirdly, I'm seeing some self-deprecation here, and I'd like to remind you that you aren't a selfish or awful person for your neurodivergence. I prefer the company of animals, stuffed or not, to people most of the time as well. It's no shortcoming of yours that you have issues reading social queues-- especially when excited. You're far from alone in that aspect, and honestly? You can't blame yourself for crossing a boundary that you didn't know existed. All you can do is keep that boundary in mind going forward. You're not psychic, so you can't have known, and anyone who gets mad at you for crossing a line you weren't aware of... might be someone you may wish to rethink being around. This is a very annoying thing that happens with Neutotypical people, I feel. They expect you to know the exact social standards of every single setting everywhere you go when they... don't communicate that whatsoever. It isn't your fault, and this is all a very long winded way for me to say: Don't beat yourself up over stupid unspoken societal standards. It doesn't make you a bad person, and neither does wanting to avoid these situations. You aren't selfish, and you aren't awful.

With that out of the way...

Generally speaking, the guys are really good with mental health and neurodivergence in general. It's kind of a monster society thing-- since monsters are all so vastly different from one another, they don't tend to balk at anything that has to do with appearance or mentality. It's just the way you are, and if it happens to cause problems for you or them, they're still very supportive. They might nudge you towards professional help if it becomes a serious problem, but on the whole, these guys are very hard to offend by behavior.

Killer also has issues with boundaries sometimes, and needs to be corrected. With the guys, this usually comes in the form of playful violence, but you can shove him off or tell him to back up or steep off just as easily. His are hard to cross, but if you manage it, he's pretty gracious with letting you know, and if he sees you edging up on that line again, he'll playfully remind you of it. He won't get mad. The most you'll get for your troubles is a noogie.

Dust may snap if his boundaries are crossed in any serious way, but he's kind of a withdrawn person. He doesn't mean to be mean, but he'll be firm. He might get a little short and brisk to get you to back off... but he'll explain why once he's wound down from it. He might get a little rattled, but he won't hold it against you. Learning to be around new people can sometimes have a steep learning curve that can go on for years after you've met and grown close to them.

Axe only snaps if you get near his skull injury. Otherwise, he's pretty chill. If it's a social boundary, he isn't bothered too much, and will remind you that it's there calmly. He'll also warn you off of it if he feels you're creeping toward his or anyone else's boundaries, and praise you with reassurances if you remember these on your own. It'd do you well to remember that one of his biggest boundaries is to not startle him awake, since... that's less one for him and more one for you, so you don't get hurt on accident.

Cross will gently bodily move you if it's a physical boundary and just... say your name correctively if it's a social one. He'll explain his boundaries, but prefers reminding you rather than telling you. He thinks that you'll remember these on your own soon enough if he just... nudges you away from them. He's pretty understanding, even if he looks stern. Baggs takes note of these behaviors and works with you on them. Little memory exercises to remind you of where general boundaries might be, offers different methods of mindfulness, and takes everything in stride. Even if you cross his, he's patient and explains gently. He also likes the subtle sort of nudging you in the right direction-- making your own associations and your own corrections are far preferable than straight directions. It allows you to build your own habits and reminders that are custom-tailored to you.

Nightmare has arguably the hardest time with this because he is not pleasant when a boundary of his has been crossed. He'll get a little sour, but still remind you carefully of what that was and why he didn't like that. It's really not you, it's him. He gets cranky and bitter when bothered, but... he also has to remind himself that no one here is psychic and can't possibly know what he's thinking. He likes to lead you into conclusions yourself ("Do you remember what happened last time?") rather than actively correcting it, and does so as gently as he can. This bothers you deeply, and he can tell. He doesn't want you agonizing over a simple mishap that, in the grand scheme of things, matters very little.

As for being closer to stuffies than to them...

...They might get a little jealous, but the most that nets you is them sitting with the plush so that you have no excuse but to spend time with them. Oh no. Fortunately, they can be pretty still and quiet if you don't feel like people at the moment. Just hanging around quietly is enough.

[asexualaromanticblog]

Before Realising My AroAce Sexuality

I want to make one thing very clear before anyone starts reading. Though I identify as being asexual and aromantic, I can only talk about my own story because it is the only one I really understand. And I know that all of us have a different story. We all walk a different path. We all react differently to the obstacles placed in out way. But I can only talk about myself and how I, and some people I know who are also aro-ace, have been affected by their sexuality. I hope sharing my story, as well as my opinions and advice is of any use to you.

I also want all my readers to feel free about contacting me if they want their story to be published or simply understood, EVEN IF YOU AREN'T AROMANTIC OR ASEXUAL YOURSELVES. I will handle everything which any of you send me with the utmost discretion and to the word referring to your wishes.

I am a British demigirl teenager of 14 years of age who has been living in Spain since the young age of about 4 or 5. I am currently undergoing my freshman year of highschool. The presence of the doubt that I was asexual always dug at the back of my mind, but I liked to think I wasn't. I was SCARED: I didn't want to be lonely for the rest of my life. In fact, I was obsessed with the idea that I would find love eventually.

I realised I didn't like boys or men when I was about 10 or 11 years old. I simply did not feel romantically attracted by them at all. Yes, I found some boys attractive, and some actors too, but I found I was not able to form romantic attractions towards them. What's more, the people who I had previously 'liked' (obvoiusly I was like 11 so never anything truly serious) had always been very good friends of mine. Such close friends that our friendship almost seemed like the celibate and completely nonsexual relationships the popular kids were forming between each other.

I knew that gay people existed. I'd never been against it. From the moment I realised being gay was a THING, I'd supported it, even if I didn't feel that way myself.

So I went and thought: hmmm... I don't like guys. That must mean I like girls. Now, what girl do I like?

So I found a pretty girl, VERY popular (actually, I remember quite clearly her name was Inés). And I decided I had a crush on her.

Then, 7th grade, I changed schools. And I lost contact with all my friends (including Inés). I found a girl, a Russian called Maria, and decided I liked her. We dated, some months later. But we never DID anything. Max was holding hands or kissing each others cheeks. Then we broke up on rather bad terms., Even now, almost a year and a half later, we don't talk. I was in the same room as her for 15 mins and has an anxiety attack. I must admit, I hold a massive amount of trauma from that relationship still.

I had never made out with anyone and never really felt the need to, even though by 8th grade most of my friends had. I felt like I fancied another of my friends, Sarah, but when I confessed my feelings I got rejected. I was not too sore about it, surprisingly. I felt more like my pride was hurt than that my heart was broken.

And then, something magical happened.

In June of 2023, at 14 years of age, I watched Heartstopper in a day with a friend.

I fell in love with it.

And then, on the 3rd of August, when season 2 was released, I watched the entirety of it at night on my phone. And that was when I discovered asexuality.

More later!

Subscribe if you want more!

[hyperfixingfr]

(I can't believe I have to make another post about this because I wanna let this stupid shit go but grown adults are sending me bullshit about things I apparently still haven't cleared up so HERE YOU FUCKING GO, STOP SENDING THREATS NOW, THANKS!)

Admittedly still bugs me how some of you claim I blew it out of proportion lol. The fandom is very well known to have been uncomfortable or even feel triggered by the proposed concept (not saying what it is because I really don't wanna talk about it further, it's over now!) so to say I, someone who tried to just keep the conversation restricted to their comments and 100% would've just been okay if they removed the post knowing how it came off to the fandom, blew it out of proportion... Eugh. I get it, it's not technically illegal (albeit does mirror real life crimes.) But I think me making a post addressing it for the majority of the fandom who would feel extremely uncomfortable seeing it if they found it in the tags themselves isn't "blowing it out of proportion". The pairing *bordered* extremely immoral things. And regardless of what you think of consent ages and what-not, I'm sure it should be obvious why I'd want to warn the majority of a fandom who is known to be uncomfortable or triggered with this concept about the concept being proposed in the tags. The fact that the only thing making it "moral" is the fact that they were aged up should understandably make MANY people feel extremely uncomfortable. And the fact that someone would want to alert the fandom to protect anyone who may be reminded of real life cases so they can block the user shouldn't be seen as something blown out of proportion. I don't wanna engage with the person or anyone in support of this pairing but the fact you guys believe I wanted anything done to them for their concept is weird as fuck. I want to keep this fandom, known to feel reasonable discomfort with the pairing, away from the content that would make them feel horrible.

The word "pedophilic", whether you believe it or not, would go with the pairing if it weren't for that single "aged up" thing. And that's what got a lot of people feeling extremely uncomfortable. Hence my usage of the word (to describe the pairing - not the PERSON WHO POSTED IT, for those of you who're illiterate and claim I called them that.)

I don't even wanna be saying this but there's grown ass adults still sending me nasty stuff in their defense. I guess that's what I get for DARING to say anything about an account with more popularity than me. I genuinely don't give a fuck about what they (person who posted it) do from here. I don't want to invade on them and you guys should rightfully have the same ideas about me, but holy shit... Grown ass ADULTS. ARE SENDING ME INSULTS AND THREATS. Calm the fuck down. I did not stab them with a knife. I made a post letting the fandom know (known for discomfort with a pairing) that the pairing was supported by them. And if they wanted to block them, they could. That's it. I do not want you guys to fuck around in their space saying a load of bullshit like you're doing with me, although it seems people on my side aren't giving them that treatment judging by their posts... Which is good, but it says a lot how their side is really loving to send little kids weird ass messages like "I know where you live" lol. I assume they don't support these messages being sent to me, but... Still. It says a lot. Leave me alone. And those who don't support them, leave THEM alone if you haven't already. I made the post for you to block them if the pairing made you uncomfortable, not send them anything nasty.

[druidx]

Her Countenance was Light - Chapter 40

CW: None AO3 ; Chapters: 01. 10. 20. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39 Tag list (ask for +/-): @aquadestinyswriting, @hannah-heartstrings, @jacqueswriteblrlibrary, @babyblueetbaemonster @mr-orion

When she finishes filling in the blanks, Farren sits back, leaning against the mortuary table leg, looking like he's aged 10 years. "I won't lie," he says eventually. "This will complicate things." Elo shifts, her butt having gone numb from the cold tile floor. "You're taking this better than I expected." Farren scoffs. "What'm I s'posed to do, huh? Send you off to the nut house?" Elo pulls her knees under her chin. "Anyone else would have." "Yeah, well, I ain't anyone else, am I?" The clock ticks. "No. Thank you." Farren waves it away. "You'd do the same for me," he says, and Elo knows he's right. "I don't know what to do next," she says instead. "You leave your summaries as they are. No one else needs to know about… the other side of this. I'll catch the boys up with the sanitised version tomorrow and keep them on-task, digging up what we can to help support this theory." At Elo's raised eyebrows, he holds up a placating hand. "I'll tell them we've got reasonable cause to believe Brauma ran you off the road and about his ridiculous stunt at City Hall – it's not gonna paint him in an innocent light." "Yates has contacts with the Art and Antiques Unit. Take a copy of… of the vic's exposé and see if he can get them to share any intel they might have about the smuggling ring." "That's a good shout. In the meantime, I don't want you anywhere near City Hall for the next few days." Elo huffs. "You'll get no argument here. I think my secondment is probably over anyway." "And I think you should get a uniform to drive you home." The clock above Snips' desk says it's nearly 19:00. "I thought we were going to get dinner?" "You need sleep." "I'm fine. And I still gotta eat."

Farren grumbles but in the end, they clock off and go around the corner to the Scholar for their usual. It's not until they're exiting, that Elo notices the colour of the sky. "Shit! Oh shit, piss and blood!" Farren looks back with a raised eyebrow. "I was supposed to meet the two factions tonight at dusk and get some answers." Farren picks up his pace towards his car. "Where're we going?" "My tenement. Someone put Shortcut Bridge back together – I said I'd meet them there." As the engine roars to life, he looks over. "Where someone tried to drown you? Bug." "I thought it would be more convenient." Farren huffs and rolls his eyes as he pulls away from the curb.

Farren pulls up alongside the brownstone row which holds Elo's tenement building. "You should wait in the car," Elo says, even as they're out and walking towards the alley which leads through the brownstones to the towpath and canal at their back. "And let you engage with potential hostiles alone?" "I don't want to spook them." "I'll hang back. But I'm not letting you do this alone – they already tried to kill you once." "I managed before, I can manage again." "You really have been out in the wilds too long," Farren says as they near the alleyway's exit, the darkling waters of the canal just beyond. "Remember the Rule of Two? Withnail would hoist me by the hamstrings if he ever found out I knowingly broke it." "Withnail isn't a captain anymore." "You think that'd stop him?" Elo falls quiet. Along the strip comes the distant shouts of someone having a domestic. A TV blares to drown it out. There's the heavy thud of a ball against a wall; kids having a kick-about. From the canal comes no sound at all. In the dim light and lengthening shadows, it's impossible to tell if anyone's waiting down there. "Stay here, at least?" Elo says. "Right you are." Farren leans against the wall, jacket brushed back from his weapon's holster. "Holler if you need me."

Elo trots down the concrete steps and stands on the towpath. It's preternaturally still and quiet. The water is flat and glossy, like the nail paint Candy uses, and smells of weeds and cold. "Snotgrut?" she calls when no one appears at her entrance. "Aster?" Grit on the path grinds under her feet. A window opens, spilling pop music into the air. The wind is a breath on her cheek. Then the shadows ripple. "Whatcha, Boss." Elo squints. "Legnok? "'S right." He sounds pleased that she remembers. "Where are the Eshen?" "Scarpered. 'S too dark for 'em, innit?" "Oh." Elo sits down on the steps and presses a hand to her forehead. "Bugger." "They weren't too happy when they left. Were wus you, anyway?" "At work. Lost track of time." "Snotgrut's a bit pissed an' all." "Yeah. I can imagine. Gods damn…"

Elo stares down through her hand-blinkered vision at a dandelion pushing through the concrete, suddenly envious of the teens she can hear singing along to the radio, full of carefree spirit. She remembers her teen years – Aunt Alexis driving her, blindfolded, around the city, windows down and quizzing her about where they were based on smell and proprioception. A rare flare of resentment bursts in her chest. It's tamped back with a deep breath; after all, Elo asked for this life. Alexis could have said no. Instead, she'd used every resource at her disposal to ensure Elo was the most prepared for it that she could be.

Elo hauls in another breath, then stands, reaching for her wallet. "Here." She hands over some bills to Legnok. "I promised you a beer if I ever saw you again. Bark, blood, bond, et cetera. Go round to the Scholar, old Davie's not gonna ask for ID." Legnok squints down at the greenbacks in his hands, his face a mixture of awe and suspicion. "There's enough there for two," Elo continues, "because – and I'm sorry to ask this – but d'you think you can get the Eshen leaders back here, same time tomorrow night?" The bills vanish into Legnok's shirt, and he scrapes out a bow. "Blood as my bond," he says. The shadows lengthen, Elo blinks, and he's gone.

"Well, what happened then?" Farren asks when she returns to the alley. "I was too late. The Eshen had gone." "Who were you talking to? Snotgrut?" "No, another Dvasia. I guess he was hanging around to let me know that everyone'd gone. I've asked him to try and get them back tomorrow night." It's full-dark now, and Elo shivers in the cool of the Spring night. Farren grunts, and the ember of his cigarette flares. "Time we got you home, eh?" Elo wants to argue – it's still early, they could chat – but inexplicably feels a wave of weariness, as if the night is dragging on her bones. Instead, she murmurs what could be an agreement and waves him ahead.

The radio is chirping as they draw alongside Farren's car. He slides into the front seat, door open, for Elo to lean up against, peering in. "Dispatch, Alpha Charlie Five responding," Farren says into the handset. "Detective Breakwood? Do you have Detective O'Toreguarde alongside?" "Affirmative, Dispatch." There is a note of relief in Sally's voice as she says, "Roger, Alpha Charlie Five. Requesting your position for General Strucker." Elo's face contorts on its own, but Farren reads everything he needs to in her grimace. "Dispatch, we are just leaving the Skiving Scholar," he lies smoothly. "O'Toreguarde is very much off-duty at this juncture, and will be sleeping it off at my apartment." The traffic rushes past. "Roger. Have a nice night, Detectives." "Affirmative, Dispatch," Farren says with a grin.

Elo remembers to breathe, as Farren replaces the handset. "Thank you," she says, straightening. "I guess you'd better head on home." "Not without you. Come on." Elo tucks her chin down and frowns. Farren scratches an eyebrow. "Elowyn, do I really gotta remind you that someone's out there trying to kill you? Allegedly one of the most powerful people in the city. Allegedly a supernatural entity. You really think it's a good idea for you to be alone, at all?" Elo opens her mouth to protest. "You've got spare skivvies at mine. And if you say anyfin along the lines of 'it's fine, I can manage, I'm used to it', then so help me, I will handcuff you to the doorframe and we'll both sleep in the car." Elo swallows. "Scooch over then," she says and slides into the car.

[mrsshabana]

Hello! I hope you're having a good day, I'm not very good with English so I apologize in advance for any spelling mistakes I may have <(＿　＿)>

I've been thinking about this for about, um, 20 minutes, very little, I know, I just, I was watching videos about the story of Hades and Persephone, from Greek mythology and- about how he kidnaps her to become his wife and- obviously I'm not talking about real life, but I couldn't help but get excited when imagining a plot like that with Gyutaro, although I don't think he is king of something, I feel like he wouldn't like it (although it's not a fixed opinion, I'm still learning from him as a character and I don't know if anyone else or you has a different perspective on that, if so, I would really like to know please!( •̀ ω •́ )✧♥) so I thought of Douma as the king of the underworld(?) and Gyutaro as one of the high ones controls there (????) very strange, I know, I'm just very excited to talk about him, but I don't have friends who like Gyutaro (although they don't dislike him either, they just don't take him into account cries), I was wondering what a relationship originating from a long-term kidnapping would be like (FICTITIALLY SPEAKING), also what could have happened for him to develop an interest in us, basically, what did we do for him to decide to take the first step?

It's just some things I wonder sometimes, but you don't have to answer this!!!Σ(っ > Д <;)っ This is literally me rambling, I already feel happy just by finding more people who like this incredible guy! points to her Gyutaro mug, I adore your writings and drawings, if I could give kudos per chapter I WOULD DO IT, I send you my best wishes☆*: .｡. o(≧▽≦)o .｡.:*☆. and hope soon to be able to write you something more structured than this haha

I love this idea! I'll be honest though, I don't know very much about greek mythology. And the only things I do know is what I learned from Poptropica.

So, I can't comment much about how I feel he'd fit into greek mythology but if anyone has any ideas feel free to share them in the comments! I'd love to hear.

But I can tell you what I think would make Gyutaro want to kidnap you to force you into a relationship with him.

It'd probably have to do with an act of kindness. Maybe you went out of your way to say something nice to him, or maybe you smiled at him when he was having a bad day. It wouldn't have to be something very big to make him become obsessed with you. As long as he felt like you looked at him differently than others had his entire life. Like he's a human being, and not some ugly freak.

It'd be difficult to adjust to being with him at first, especially because he literally kidnapped you. But over time you'd be able to grow close to him. He'd put on a tough front, like he's in control and just wants you to do as he says. But when you get to know him better you'd learn that he really just wants someone to accept him for who he is and show him affection. 💚

I also just wanted to say, I really appreciate your question! And it makes me so so happy to know you enjoy my writing! Thanks so much for the kind words and being so supportive. ♪(^∇^*)