#Bruce is a paranoid dad

[lunewolf13]

Dick: *makes gagging sounds* *coughs* *spits*

Bruce from another room: You okay?

Dick, completely fine: Brushing my teeth!

Bruce: It sounds like you're vomiting.

Dick: Dramatic effect!

Bruce: Don't get too cold! We don't need anyone else getting sick.

[superbat-love]

Diana: I think I might be attracted to this guy, you know? He just seems like a good family man.

Clark: There’s nothing more attractive than a man who is protective of his family.

Diana: [nudges him playfully] Is that what attracted you to Bruce?

Clark: Of course! One time, I walked into the cafeteria, and suddenly the whole room turned red. Out of nowhere, Bruce came charging in, bodyslammed me to the ground, and kept yelling, “Stay away from my son!”

Diana:

Clark: We rolled around on the floor for a bit until some people managed to pull him off me. Turns out he thought Dick and I were dating. Luckily, the misunderstanding was cleared up once Bruce was trapped in a Lantern ring construct, and I finally had a chance to explain everything to him. Good times.

Diana: …Wow.

Clark: That was the moment I realized just how protective Bruce is of his family. And honestly, it made me admire him even more.

Diana: Maybe we need to reevaluate our attraction to “protective family men.”

[hailkingphantom]

Dp x dc

I know that a joke about bruce having adopted millions of kids and how the batkids tease him about it, but what happend if that "joke" have more truth than the batkids are aware of?

Its impossible for bruce to adopt all the orphans, homeless and sick children in the world, but if Bruce could afford the whole watchtower withour affecting his company or fortune why he couldn't afford medicines, houses, schools and others suplies to children thar really need it?

Why cant be Danny one of those children?

Bruce met danny in a undercover mission to investigate the mayor of a small town: Amity Park. At first everything seemed normal, until an unknow figure crashed in the billionare's house. A kid, who couldn't be older than fouteen, had been the one who caused the damage after falling. The kid was bruised and tired, but that didn't him from fly to beat an unknow creature thar appear of nowhere and had started to attack the people around.

That child was a hero of this town.

A child had to step up to do their job, his job.

He have a kid to adopt contact

_____________________________

"Fuck!! Fucking bloody hell !!" Said a men, in front him was a glowing circle wich looked to become brighter and brighter every second

"Constantine! What is this!" Superman asked as he come back after knock of the last of the cultists. The room become colder and the heroes looked more and more concerned.

"The fuckers tried to summon the ghost king!! I tried to stop the summoning but its to late!!" The magician yelled. All the heroes there (WW, Superman, Flash, Nightwing) tensed except Batman. The bats sighed and told "Dont do anything, let him come"

"B what the—!" A thunder and flash of light interrupted him.

Black smoke started to cover the room, any light thar it wasnt feom the circle died. Murmurs and giggles surrounded the only occupants of the room, the shadows grow and sparkles appear.

The terrorific scenary was covered by tiny sparkles that looked like stars, and if you know well, you could see that it were in the same order as the real stars.

A orb of light came out of the summoning circle. Then begin to grow and form a figure, a tiny figure.

Snow white hair and glowing green eyes, a black hazmat suit and a some armor covering it. A cape in his back that reflect the universe with a symbol and a thin black crown, decorated with cold ice beutifuler than any gem they had seen.

Pointed ears perked up and a sharp smile appsr as the King look towards the heroes.

"W̷̜̟̞͔̔̓̍̈́̄̎̀̀̈́̉h̸̛̩̺͇̠̥̰͇̣̝̟̐͆̇͆̈́̆ö̷̠̬̗̬̫͕́͊͆͌̍͒̄͛̚ ̸͇̄̔̉d̶̻̠̼͇̽̾́̓͗̓̚ȃ̷̧͕͍̗̬͍͒̑r̵̲̻̗̎͐͆̽͑ẽ̷͖͔̣̩͈̯̜̹̈́̂͑̕d̸̀̇̊̋̌̔͐̀͠��̡ ̸̼͍̜͈̖̭̟͑t̸̨̛̙̦̬̜̩͇͕͆̈́̓̄̕ơ̶̮̲͚̾̂̀̐͋̀̔̈͂ ̵̳͙̪͇̭͕̗̒s̶̖͒̀u̵̧̠̪͓̫̳͇̲̰̿̍̽̋̈̐̆̿͘͝m̸̛̩̫̟̱m̷̠̣̭̞͕͒̈́͋̕ő̴͖̘̥̰̞̣̟n̸̢̧͙̲͖̩̠̈́̇̂́͑̈̌̃̀̕ ̸̗̓̋͆t̴͉͈̣̅̒͆͜h̵̯̞͗ē̷̝̒̚͝ ̶̝͛̑̌͊́̎̚͝H̸̢͖̞̟̀ỉ̶̧̥̘̪̱͔́͛͊͋͆͗͌ͅg̶̝̞̿͐̇̉̚̚h̵̯͖̉ ̸̖̄̄K̸̬͕͕̩̘̮͎͕̮̔͒͆͋͐̏͐̚i̷̡̛̳̜̖̔́̐́n̵̺̳̫͆̓͠g̸̨̡͙͖̤͈̯̫̠̫̉̄̐̅́͑̊̇́͌ ̷̛͎̹͚̖̈́̓́̉̇̒̕͘o̵̭̙̦̻̺̳̮̜̗̞̊̐̈́̈́̍̈́̑͒̍f̵̧̣̩͎̟͇̕͜͜ ̵̨̛͖̼̼͙̭̍́͗̋̈́̊͜ṫ̶̥̉͒̽̀̾͗͝ḣ̸̲͎͚͚̟͚̙̒͌̈́͌̈́̚͝͝ͅḙ̶̢̜̱̼̟̩̫̪̽͆̓͊̃̽̅̄͒ ̴̧̙͈̳̘̜͂̊̅̊̃̌ͅḬ̴̪̜̲͔̮̱͑͒̆̚͜n̶̘̦̪̠̭͚̳̜̳͚̾̍̄̑̄̕f̷̪͈̯͚͉̖̦̥͌̐̈́̋͜ỉ̵͉̖͎͙͍̦̦̌͐̐͋̀͌̾͒ṋ̶̮͎͈̜̐̈́ͅị̷͎̳̾͆̾̓̿̿̂t̷͔̮͙͎̅̋̃̊͋̈́̊̚͠͝e̸̯̯̲̗̥̟̲̓̃̂́̏ ̷̖͔̣̯̜̲͇̅̏͝͝Ŗ̷͔̝̯̗̗̣̟̼̩̄e̵̢̘̘͈͙̐̆͜ͅā̵̠̙͍̰͔̠͉̻l̴̤̦̜̝̬̻̦̲͐́́̏̓m̷̛̠̱̥̓̀͌̓͆s̸̲̗͈͖̞̫̩̜̅͊̑̑̌̃̈́?̸̛̛̛͉̤̙͈̣̳̫̱̱̪̍͌͌̀́̇̚"

Constantine was going to talk when the bat interrupted him " Danny"

The king turned his eyes to the dark knight and sunddely all the pression dissapear.

"Bruce!" A cheerful, young voice yelled. It took a moment to the rest of the heroes realize that it came from the same king who talked with that inhuman voice before.

The young kid jump happily in the arms of the dark knight and embrace him.

"B, when did you adopted the Ghost king?!!?" Nightwing screamed hysterically.

The Bat looked at his son a confused, " Danny is one of the kids I support, I thought that you already knew it"

"how I supposed to know—! Wait. ONE OF!!!!?? HOW MANY MORE ARE YOU HIDDEN FROM US!!!??"

"Hidden??"

[undertheredhood]

bruce after gotham war: why don't my children talk to me?

dick who is so done with him: it's the way you act! it's the way you act!

[weirdheadcanons]

Reading the World's Finest Comics

And absolutely loving it that DC finally stops making Batman a paranoid, abusive jerk (at least in this version)

Friends with Clark Kent? Check.

Trusts Clark with his identity, hangs out with him to relax, fully willing to call Clark and Kara for help in Gotham if the situation is dire enough and the Bats are out of their depth.

Good mentor/dad to teenaged Dick (who seems around 16 or 17, the age he got kicked out by previous versions of Bruce, or in some versions ran away to get out of Bruce's emotional abuse).

Listens to Dick vent about an embarrassing date, offers some decent advice and encouragement.

Willingly and happily performs acrobatic stunts with Dick in a circus, though that was not necessary for the mission in question.

Not happy about the Titans team, but has valid concerns which he takes time to explain to Dick. Clearly states that he trusts the kid and is proud of him.

Loving this. This is now my canon and I'm here happily imagining how everything else will fit in with this Bruce.

(And yes, since Jason won't be entering the scene canonically for a while, I'm gonna pretend they have enough of a healthy communication between Bruce-Dick-Jason that the Ethiopia incident doesn't happen and Jaybird lives... or at least the Red Hood return is handled better. Please.)

[navree]

it's fodder for excellent drama but let's admit it, hush and war games and identity crisis and under the red hood all happening in relatively close succession is insanely funny. just bruce speedrunning the worst fucking 365 days of his life. they should release a compilation book of all four and just title it 'batman and the terrible horrible no good very bad year'

[thedevilundercover]

The bat kids should threaten to get adopted by Tim every time Bruce is being a dickhead or just an inconvenience in anyway shape or form. Tim is paranoid enough to have his foster license and probably overthinks it enough to have Gotham CPS under his control. (Some people are bribing the cops while this man is bribing CPS smh.)

And like when Bruce over steps, they’re like “ok then, Tim’s my new dad now. “ Then they go camp out at Tim’s place for a while.

Usually the younger ones (+Cass) do this but it’s even more hilarious when Dick and Jason catch on to this. I think that Jason would do it first tho

Like imagine if Bruce refused to give Jason money for ammo or smth:

Bruce, literally so tired bc of this: Jaylad, for the last time, I’m not giving you money to buy real bullets. I'd be happy to buy you the rubber ones.

Jason, the most extra, dramatic younger-sibling-turned-older-sibling: Ok then, I get it, you don’t love me anymore. I can take a hint. You know what? I’ll do you a favour and get myself adopted by Tim *cue fake sniffles and dramatic exit*

Bruce, so so tired this has happened like twenty times this week already and it’s Wednesday: Oh my god why does he keep stealing my kids what the fuck

Tim also has no concept of money so he just shrugs, hands them his black amex and lets them do whatever the fuck they want

[pinklotushere]

Ok I had this rotting in my mind for days now

Bruce *going live as brucie Wayne because he saw a tweet about him saying he was acting weirdly (it was actually damian shit posting) and paranoid abt his identity he decides to up the brucie effect to 100* : and then he winked at moi! Like, can you believe itttt~

Dick *kicks the door open, bursting into the room full on sobbing* : bruuuceee

Bruce *immediately stops what he was saying and gets up to comfort him* : what's wrong chum?

Tim, steph, cass and duke *run into the room in various levels of crying*

Bruce *actually starts to panic* : kids?

Damian*walk in sniffing* : baba!

Bruce *pale and looks about ready to cry himself* : what's wrong?who was it? Give me names,descriptions, anything-

Jason-youre-not-my-dad-i-dont-live-here-fuck-you-mothefucking-todd *walks in red-faced and barely keeping it together*: dad..

Okay, picture this we've got Bruce pale and sweaty, holding a still sobbing dick and and surrounded by steph,cass,duke and picking damian up all quietly crying and/or sniffing and we've got tim pressing his face to Bruce side, shoulders chaking and then jason of all people starts sniffing and Bruce literally goes even paler (of that's even possibe) and pulls him in

Bruce : What's wrong? Talk to me, sweetheart

Dick : it-it's they- * Starts wailling*

Bruce : they? Who's they? Did you get their names?adresss? Social security number?

Steph : n-no it's not- *hiccups and buries her face on him, you can hear her crying*

Jason :..I don't think I'll ever be the same

Bruce : from what? What is it?

Barbara * Wheeling in, popcorn in hand, eyes red and sniffing:

Bruce : Barbara?

Babs: hey b

*Que lots of sniffing*

Bruce : what's going on?

Babs:Oh, we watched a movie

Bruce: excuse me?

Babs: Yeah, grave of the fireflies, man that was heartbreaking

*higher crying*

Bruce:

The next day

Headlines go like this :

*brucie Wayne secretly just a loving father*

*brucie Wayne threatens whoever hurts his children*

*Wayne children being dependent on their dad no matter how old they get*

Social media similarly is bursting with :

"I love how he was ready to commit murder for them lmaooo"

"Is it just me or did brucie just get 10 times hotter*

"Man, dick grayson crying is something I didn't know I needed, that man is such a pretty crier"

"Damn, I love how tim drake and Stephanie brown just buried themselves in their dad"

"My God I always thought damian wayne was bratty but he's actually really cute?"

*God brucie holding damian, dick and still hugging all his other children is so hot"

"Hold on, isn't jason todd dead?"

(And no, this isn't me projecting. grave of the fireflies did not emotionally destroy me. What?)

[ryemiffie]

I love imagining the scenario where one of Bruce's kids is getting married but no one knows Bruce's identity and it creates shenanigans. Like for example, Dick is marrying Starfire and she doesn't know Bruce's identity.

And they of course want Bruce at the wedding since he's Dick's dad, but they also want a hero as security due to the nature of the wedding, not only as a wedding between two heroes but also a Wayne wedding (not to mention holding a wedding like that in gotham is never easy) which is a pretty big deal in both respects and garners a lot of attention to be the perfect opportunity for a villian attack. So Starfire and Dick decide to request a justice league member there as security. Some heroes are eliminated due to them already being meant to attend as guests who are meant to be able to enjoy the wedding and some already have missions that need their attention, like Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and the Martian Manhunter are busy off-world, Shazam and HawkGirl are busy with a villian who's been on the run, and Superman is supposed to be doing press for the wedding as Clark, so they decide to give the task to Batman seeing as he's more than qualified and is already accustomed to the area (gotham), he can't figure out a way to decline the mission without risking his identity being leaked since he really has no reason to not be able to do it, except of course saying he has civilian business, on the day of the wedding, at the exact time of the wedding.. yeah hell no, Batman is way to paranoid to say something like that! So he agrees to do security as Batman for the wedding while also agreeing to attend the wedding as Bruce, ya' know, so people don't suspect anything about his identity due to the situation.

And before you ask yes Dick has realised the situation but no he is not helping Bruce out of it because its fucking funny to him, and none of the other batkids agree to where the suit for the day since they're also guests and they also find the situation funny as hell. So cue Bruce trying to constantly switch between making appearances as Bruce and doing security as Batman, like the classic sitcom episode where the person has to constantly switch between one date to the next, but it's Batman just trying to enjoy his kid's wedding.

[justsomestuffreally]

I think the Batkids reaction to a Bruce who isn't de-aged to 8 but rather 29 (pre-Jason death, post his adoption) would be fascinating. 

Their reaction would vary wildly:

Dick: Oh. Bruce is soft again. Bruce calls them ‘chum’ and ‘buddy’ and gives head pats for no reason. He still isn’t perfect, his communication skills are still a work in progress, but compared to his future self? Without actively dying Dick is hugged plenty. Bruce asks him to go to the zoo, unrelated to any case, just to spend time together. Dick is hit with more nostalgia and longing for the past than he knows what to do with.

Also notable: his dad is younger than him. That is something. Second, holy existential crisis Batman, his dad is younger than him and already one adult and one teenage kid??? Dick is not ready to feel this old yet. Third, Dick has absolutely no idea how Bruce managed to stay patient through his no-pants years. He is going to thank reason every day from now on that Damian wears full protection.

Jason: After his death and League he clung to an image of Bruce. One many tried to beat out of him, but he still kept it somewhere close to his heart, buried deep enough even he couldn’t see it. When he came back Bruce wasn’t like this idea of him. How stupid of him to believe the mind of a traumatized kid. Trying to create one good thing before the kid drew his last breath. Making up memories that never even existed.

But they did. Every smile and hug and even his words reflect the image tugged safely against his still-beating heart. His dad very clearly, very deeply loves him. Which is so much worse. Because he can understand why a Bruce, who never cared, didn’t kill the Joker. But he cares. So why the fuck did he not kill the Joker?

Tim: The reason he joined the family, the reason why he became Robin in the first place was because he saw a problem when Bruce started self-destructing and thought ‘Someone needs to fix that!’. Therefore he went and collected Dick, who didn’t seem keen on fixing it. So, the job fell to him to fix it.

He thought he did a good job, he thought he fixed the problem. Except now he sees who Bruce was, and he knows he failed. Their Bruce is less soft, less affectionate, less like he was before. Batman needs a Robin and Tim didn’t manage to be good enough of one to save him. 

[Or: Tim has a guilt complex a hundred miles wide and blames himself for things that aren’t his fault part 52]

Steph: Jason and she are very similar. Both come from the Narrows, both have a mother addicted to drugs and a shitty father. The differences start when Steph keeps waiting on the roof of their apartment for Batman to whisk her away, while Jason tries to steal the tires of the Batmobile and is taken in.

When Steph started out as Spoiler Bruce tried to keep her off the field, and obviously this one would too (even if he would probably be less paranoid about it), but she knows this Bruce would have also taken her in. This Bruce would be the father she always wished for when she sat on their roof and couldn’t see any stars. 

And she didn’t get to have this because Jason went ahead and died. (Of course, she knows she isn’t fair to the guy. Dying isn’t fun… And she knows the only reason she lived is because he died. When Batman rescued her from Black Mask she was in such terrible shape that Leslie managed to convince the World’s Greatest Detective that she died. If Jason hadn’t died Bruce wouldn’t have been as paranoid, wouldn’t have noticed her missing so soon, wouldn’t have been as urgent in his response. Would have been just a minute slower, a minute which would have killed her. Just as it had Jason.)

For her, this Bruce is a distorted mirror into a past which never was. 

Cass: This Bruce and B are not the same person. They don’t move the same. In a fight, this Bruce is younger, faster, stronger. Doesn’t compensate for a previously broken spine. Less experienced. Still one of the most experienced she knows, but less. 

He still moves differently, outside a fight, less pain. More likely to engage in physical affection, more likely to hug and pat and talk. He talks more than B. B knows what she means without words. This Bruce doesn’t.

She likes this Bruce, warmth, and softness. But not as much as B. He knows what she means, when she wants a hug, when she tells him ‘I love you’ without words. B doesn’t need words. This Bruce doesn’t know her, doesn’t communicate like her. She wants B back.

Damian: At first, when this version of his father seemed uncanny and oddly familiar, he assumed it to be due to the stories of his mother. After all, she always told him tales about his father. He simply did not have the frame of reference to understand the kindness she spoke of. Clearly, the clash between the ideals of the League and the ones of his father causes these feelings, just as they did when he first entered the manor.

He presumed this to be the case until one day on patrol Batman laid a hand on his shoulder and told him he did a good job after no particularly impressive fight and he nearly called him ‘Grayson’. Because the stories of his mother may have painted the picture of this version of his father, however, it wasn’t what made it familiar; no, he knew this kindness. These hugs and compliments one would bestow upon a child. Compliments which, despite the indignity, still warm him. Because Grayson learned how to be a… caregiver from his father.

His father used to be like Grayson, used to be until his grief hardened him. Damian could have had this. Damian could have a brother and father who would- But he doesn’t because of Todd. He loathes Todd. Loathes him for ruining the life he could have had.

Why did he die anyway? Damian certainly wouldn’t have a problem escaping bonds created by the Joker, Damian would have disarmed the bomb in time, Damian would have never thrown this life away like he did.

[Or: Damian is a child who was raised by assassins and has unreasonable standards for fighting abilities and also is a child who needs to focus his rage on someone.]

Duke: He was neither there before Jason died nor in the aftermath [according to my math he was around 4 when Jason died] he joined the family when Jason was already back for 4 years or so. He mostly skipped all the drama. For him, Bruce is the way Bruce is because he is Bruce. It’s weird to see him so different, to see how grief shaped parts of Bruce which Duke assumed were just Bruce things.

He’s glad this Bruce is brighter, or not because it just highlights how much that light will dim? Who knows, certainly not him. 

What he does know is that, with their Bruce, he has a distance which, with his parents still alive, he appreciates. With this Bruce, he can understand why Dick struggled so much whether he wants to be his ward or son, how he doesn’t want to replace his parents but still have this Bruce as a dad. It definitely explained the ted talk Dick tried to give him after Bruce officially took him in as a ward.

He likes this Bruce well enough, but he doesn’t necessarily want him to stay this way. Yes, their Bruce is less happy, less open but he did heal, he did grow. Duke met a Bruce who tried to learn from his mistakes, learned to communicate better, and learned when to pull and when to push. For Tim, Damian, Dick, and certainly Jason there is too much baggage, too much history in their relationships, it’s difficult for them to ever move past- anything really.

Sure, when Dick and Bruce are on the same page they are essentially invincible but then the past catches up again and they don’t talk to each other for months. And honestly? Apart from Cass, Duke’s pretty sure he has one of the best relationships with Bruce simply because he got to know him at a better time.

Duke doesn’t mind this Bruce. But their Bruce loved Jason, cared for him so deeply the scars still show to this day. And he still chooses to open up again even if just a bit by bit. Even if just Duke can see it. He is used to being the only one that can see.

And maybe knowing this care extends to him, this love even grief can’t shake? Maybe it makes him feel just a little bit safer, a little bit warmer, a little bit brighter.

[woodland-gremlin]

Meeting the Kids

Today was the day that Dick’s boyfriend, Danny, would be introducing him to his three kids. He has heard so much about the gremlin trio that he could recite how Danny adopted them and what they are like forwards and backwards in his sleep at this point. And as he fidgeted outside of his boyfriend’s apartment in Fawcett that was exactly what he did.

Ellie is Danny’s biological daughter that was officially put under his guardianship when he was emancipated at 17, but unofficially he has been watching over her for much longer. She is the oldest of the three, being 11. Exploring and causing untold amounts of chaos, usually with her two younger brothers, is her bread and butter in life. Will not hesitate to turn that controlled chaos onto you if you hurt her family, if the stories of what she does to her sperm donor is an indication. Tales of all the places he has traveled when he was in the circus and stress he has caused Bruce at galas are his best bet to not getting pelted with glitter the moment he walks in the door.

Billy is the most recent addition to the family after living on the streets for the last few years. He is the middle child at 10 years old. Being forced into foster care, which is a death sentence according to Jason, and living on the streets, which is apparently better than foster care (again according to Jason), has made him vary of adults. The only reason he trusted Danny enough to be adopted, was through a long campaign of food, a safe place to sleep that he could leave at any time, the other kids, and a few private emotional moments. From the stories he is a sweet kid whose swearing could make a sailor blush. He brought some of Alfred’s homemade food and stories of Jason for him.

Damian was taken in 6 years ago when Danny was 19. His birth family was in a cult, raising him as its heir before trying to sacrifice him to some higher being, when Danny found him. Even with the ruff start he is very in touch with his home country’s culture, Danny even getting in touch with people from his culture to teach the whole family so they can better understand and respect it. He is the youngest of the trio at 9 and loves animals. He has also seemingly inherited Danny’s adoption tendencies when it comes to said animals. He is also the most likely to challenge him to a duel for Danny’s honor, he does it to every potential partner of Danny's, much less one actually dating him. Mentions of Batcow while accepting said duel should help Damian at least tolerate him.

All three of them are the stars of Danny’s life. Dick has heard all about the bullshit Danny gets for being a father of three, two which are in the double digits, at 25 and how protective the Nightingale family is of each other. And that isn’t even counting his older sister, who he has met over the phone, and all the others claimed extended family. How often Danny has broken up with his partners over the kids or said kids driving out those partners if they didn’t think that they were good enough for their dad. So, no Jason, he wasn’t being paranoid, considering that they ran the last one out in tears, covered in neon, biodegradable glitter and paint, he was being practical!

What Dick did not know was that as he was panicking and making plans the gremlin trio was making their own plans. Plans of his demise.

[jey-chan]

Danny, showing up in the midle of a full family and friends diner.

Danny: Grampa Clocworks said is time to pic you end of the deal? And he send me here. ... idk who is the one that did the deal o what was it, but he send me with bags of my things?

All capes in the room are traying to record if they make a deal and traying to come with loopholes.

Alfred just noded.

Alfred: Oh, you must be his ward then. Pleasure to meet you yung Master Danny, please call me Alfred. And follow me, i have alredy a bedroom for you.

Danny: Oh you sure are brithis... Okay, just before that, does someone here is called Car? Carel?

Clark: hu... i think is pronuncied Kar-El.

Danny: sorry my kryptonian is not good. Your dad sais that is proud and that stop beging a dik to the new half kryotian mirror brother.

To Diana: Pandora sais that you are doing a great job and to remind your sisters that no all mans are bad. And to someone called Bruce, your mom sais go to terapy and not beging so paranoid. You are scaring her grankids away.

Done with his mesages, Danny followed rhe bulter, out of the kichen.

Leving behind the chaos.

[logicallyblind]

Okay okay but consider possible batfam fic idea:  

so Bruce is in an emergency justice league meeting that got called but because its taking place at night he has a comm on in his ear playing at a low volume because all of the batfam are out on patrol around gotham covering his patrol route for him and because you know B is a paranoid, overprotective fucker he just to make sure everything is going smoothly for his kids but he doesn’t plan on actually letting them know he’s tapped into their network because he can already hear the lecture from Dick about trusting them to take care of the city.  

So he’s listening to them quietly while also paying attention to Clark talking about some alien diplomacy issue and his kids are YAPPING away about the stupidest shit to one another cause they don’t have B telling them off for ‘unprofessional unnecessary chatter while on patrol’ and  you’re getting a mix of all the dynamics between them all and the longer the meeting is going on the more B’s eye is just TWITCHING because his Dad senses are just going hay wire and he is just here like ‘I cannot say anything in front of the league because they cannot know I have children cause I'm Batman and I work alone blah blah blah’, usual brooding, but Damian and Tim are squabbling with one another about a rescue that took place an hour ago and Dick is challenging Jason to a parkour contest and Steph is challenging the Riddler to a riddle off with riddles she made up and have no answer just to piss him off and his dad sense is just like an alarm going off and then he just cant take it anymore cause Duke (pretend he’s on nightshift to make up for the man down or smth idk shh) says something like ‘I'm going to do my book report in the morning Richard leave me be’ even though Bruce KNOWS he isn't going to do it in the morning, this has happened before they have an AGREEMENT, a CONTRACT god damn it but they don't know Bruce is listening to the comms Duke just goes something like “its fine B won't even find out!” and Bruce just LOSES it there and then and just presses his comm and goes “NO. No, stfu all of you I am taking charge here” and he just starts going off on them all for the different things they were whining about like

“No Signal, go and do your damn book report right now you are not going to be doing it in the morning you always say you will and you never wake up early enough to get it done so then you end up speed doing it in the car while nearly stress crying and I am cannot deal with that while running on 49 hours of no sleep so go and do it right this damn minute. I am TIRED, I am tired boy go. GO. I love you, goodnight.” 

“N go and unload the damn dishwasher. I asked you four. FOUR days ago to do it and A is not coming home until next week please I am begging you I have been drinking my coffee out of bowls and a straw for days now. Thank you, I love you goodnight.”  

“Red Robin. Put the coffee down. No- I know its in your hand I can feel it. I can feel it in my BONES child you cannot hide from me, down. Now. Good. Get a piece of fruit and go to bed. No I don't give a fuck if- no. I don't care if the pentagon has laughably easy security to bypass right now it has been over 72 hours since you closed your eyes I WILL call A I will, I’ll do it right now. I’m calling him right now- good okay goodnight. I’m sending Dick to check on you to make sure you’re actually sleep. I love you too goodnight”  

“Robin I know you're there. Damn right go to bed, Titus can go with you yes you don't have to ask every night baby its going to be the same answer, I love you goodnight.” 

“Hood and Spoiler stop trying to goad rogues into fighting each other and go home. Hood will you- thank you. Goodnight I love you both....no S I will not ask Ivy if she’ll make you real life lil shop of horrors plant to leave at your ex’s house please stop asking. Goodnight.”   

"C are you- I love you too."

And he just lets out this enormous, patented Dad sigh and looks up after a few moments and realizes the entire justice league is just watching him absolutely GOBSMACKED because oh my god how long has this been going on for?? because like what the fuck this was cold, calculated, ‘they think he's actually a robot’ Batman, who just all of a sudden just went BOOM father mode is activated, this is a patriARCH, you know? Daddy bats alright. And he's just like, his facial expression doesn't so much as twitch but a light blush just appears on his entire face and then Clark is just like HEART EYES and Hal is just like HEARTEYES (??!!) and Barry is suddenly having a sexuality crisis because what the fuck is this, and Diana is just like, speechless but in love and he just mumbles after a few moments “...you can continue your speech Clark I apologize for my lapse in professionalism” and Hal is just like “NAH MOTHERFUCKER YOU ARE NOT BREEZING PAST THAT WHAT THE FUCK SPOOKY??” and then the entire situation just devolves in chaos.  

[frownyalfred]

Bruce and Dick actively not associating with each other within the league bc they’re both paranoid

The tragic duality of “no, I don’t know him” / “he’s my dad” will actually kill me one day when thinking about this specific trope

[r3ynah]

Extended Family

DCxDP

An Au where, Maddie is Damian and Danyal, Biological mother besides Talia, Basically Talia and Maddie(+Jack) both grew up in LOA and were very best friends(lovers?? at some point including Jack). Talia wanted a natural birth for her son, as she was not really fond of the idea of a test tube baby. so she asked Maddie a favour to become a surrogate. which Maddie happily accepted. because of her experience with Jazz and Danyal's birth, Talia was sure Maddie can give birth to her son safely.

This was approved by Ra's Because he deemed Maddie as someone that could be trusted due to her becoming one of the most strongest and smart assassins in the LOA(He was fond of her, like really really fond.) So he accepted his daughter proposal for Maddie to become the surrogate.

And then Damian was born, Jazz and Danny basically loved Damian and would not go anywhere but the baby's side. Jack loved taking care of Damian due to Maddie and Talia not knowing how to take care of a baby with physical affection.(basically house husband behavior,).

As the kids grew they become closer through the years until you know, it wasn't safe for them in the LOA anymore so they helped Damian escape first to his Bio dad's place(They did let him pick though, if he wanted to stay with the fenton-nightangles or go to Bruce, he chose the latter because if something happened to them he'll have connections.) and then Maddie and Jack escaped with their children in a random town named Amity park. which turns out was a hotspot for Lazarus pits or Ectoplasm. (They decided to change the name cause everytime Jack hears the word pits he started laughing).

The children of course never severed their communication throughout the years. And Bruce never asked about his life at the LOA so he never introduced his half siblings.

Damian hated his older brother, Danyal with all his might. if you asked him to choose between his Half-sister Jazz or Danyal. He'll choose Jazz in a heartbeat.

He hated him, because of his foolishness and absolute neglect of his surroundings, making him a easy prey amongst people who wants to take advantage of him. He disliked Danyal's poor choices in life especially now.

The youngest wayne stood in the middle of one of the many hallways of his highschool as he stared at a certain, black haired and blue eyed girl, who was waving at him ecstatically, he contemplated if he should fight the girl head on or just run and escape.

Obviously in this situation he would pick the most desirable option to make sure his day wasn't ruined by his older brother, so he picked the latter. Damian dashed through the hallways, making sure to lose the girl before the third period started. He slowed down as he looked warily at his surroundings his back against the storage room incase he needed a hiding place from that test tube spawn.

When suddenly a pair of arms phased through the door embracing Damian as he tried to escape.

The girl giggled as she kept her hold on the older boy who tried to get her off him. "Hi uncle Damian!"

she greeted as she finally let go making space for the boy to take a step back.

"Danielle. Why are you here, Did Danyal send you to pester me?" He glared at his niece, as he kept his guard up.

"Kind of, mama sent me here to check up on you." She explained "You kinda went MIA when you stopped answering his texts and calls."

"This is absurd, I can take care of myself. him thinking something happened to me for not answering his calls is offending, I am not like him." Damian stated as he finally lowered his guard. And started to walk away expecting for Elle to follow to which she did.

"Eh.. You know him, His just paranoid he always is" Elle exclaimed as she looked at her schedule. "What's your next class Uncle?"

"Math."

"Ooh Yey! We're classmates, let's sit together!"

A groan left Damian as Elle chuckled and continued to look at her class schedule beside him, Peaceful quietness welcomed the two as they walked to their shared class.

——

"Do you have a apartment nearby?" Damian asked as he stood up from his table waiting for Elle as she packed her notebooks, only filled with doodles from both party.

"Nope, Mama requested that we move here for easier transport but i didn't wanna bother with all the moving stuff." Elle explained as she finished tidying up. "Beside I can just fly back and forth, what's the use of my powers if I can't abuse em."

"Your logic is as worse as Danyal." Damian exclaimed as they both headed out the door. "Follow along. you'll be staying at my manor this week."

"Why?" Elle asked suspiciously

"Because, It is a tiring job to use your flight ability for something so stupid." The boy explained.

"Is that really all?"

"Ofcourse not, As your uncle it's my job to keep you energized and unbothered, But as your mother's brother its my duty to annoy him for thinking i was in danger. so I'm basically taking you hostage at the manor." Damian grinned, as he took his niece's hand to make sure she doesn't get lost through the maze of hallways

"So basically kidnapping? I'm in."

——

"Master Damian, welcome home." Alfred greeted as he opened the front door. "And who might you be?"

"Hello Alfred, This is Danielle your Great-granddaughter." Damian said, making Alfred raise his eyebrows slightly before returning to his relaxed state.

"Well, nice to meet you Lady Danielle" Alfred greeted with a smile, as he shook her hand.

"Please call me Elle, Alfred" Elle brightly smiled

"Very well then Lady Elle." Alfred chuckled.

"Is father home yet?" Damian asked

"No not yet master Damian, you two may go to the living room as I prepare the guest room for Lady Elle." Alfred exclaimed as he headed to the kitchen to finish what he was doing.

Elle looked at Damian, Damian looked at Elle.

"I can feel my phone vibrating from my bag." She laughed. Her mother Danny was certainly going to be sad that his little brother kidnapped his daughter for a Uncle and niece Hangout.

[eternallyhauntingthehouseoflove]

Hey, i read the “Bat-boys finding out your pregnant” and may i ask for more? It was sooo cute that i need more of it 😭💕

The Batboys fathers HCs

A/N: this request is long overdue that I’m sure the requester doesn’t even remember it, but I’ve arrived at last. I hope this is what they wanted. The Absolute Power run has restored my love for Nightwing and comics. ❣️

Dick Grayson is a fun dad. At first, Dick suffocated beneath the weight of fatherly duties. He wanted to be better than Bruce. Dick loved him, but he could admit that his boyhood wasn’t a salubrious environment for the young mind. No child should have to carry the weight of Bruce’s mission. Thus, Dick’s mission became ensuring yours and the baby’s lives were secure, safe, and joyous.

Pale beams of sunlight kissed your cheeks good morning. The aroma of maple syrup wafted throughout the house, tickling your nostrils as you carried yourself down the stair steps, footfall by footfall. There Dick stood at the stove, scooting the black spatula beneath a golden pancake and flipping it into the air, causing your baby to burst out into a fit of giggles before the pancake hit the skillet with a sizzle. He was proud of himself for making his baby laugh.

“Well, well, look at mama.” A grin crept across his lips as he spotted you creeping closer, supernovas bursting in his electric blue irises.” You were snoring in a pool of drool when I awoke, so I grabbed the baby and started breakfast.” Vibrant seas of pacifiers, rattles, and toy pianos adorned the house.

Dick attempted to rush the developmental process. Not out of callousness, but sheer excitement to have a child. He had already stocked the baby in dolls, trucks, pacifiers, fruit snacks, apple juice (watered down, of course). He even installed a nightlight that short circuited the house at first, but Bruce helped him fix it. Reading is good for the baby right? Dick is on it. He’s already ordered the best and most classic tales; Snow White and the Seven Dwarves, Alice in Wonderland, Dr. Seuss, Little Red Riding Hood.

Dick Grayson has read multiple novels on fatherhood, motherhood, child development, postpartum depression. He hates surprises, and babies are the breeding ground of surprises. He will pack the go-bag full of onesies, pacifiers, diapers, wipes, toys because he doesn’t want you to be in public and not have the materials.

“Give me a few days to install the new changing table. You’ll love it.” Crimson blush adorned his tanned cheeks, a proud grin dawning on his lips, showcasing his pearlescent teeth.” It broke when I weight checked it, thank god. Damian, albeit reluctantly, is coming out here tomorrow to translate the instructions.”

Jason Todd is the protective, paranoid father because he’d placed a bullet in the worst humanity had to offer, witnessed otherworldly horrors done to the little guys, the folks who lack billions of dollars to hole up on secluded islands and cabins. He can’t eradicate all the scum, can’t caulk the fractures villains seem to keep slipping through—and that terrifies him.

Jason never imagined a life worth living to be possible. He’d thought himself a sentient zombie, an unlucky boy yanked from the eternal peace of a cold, soundless grave and forced to enact vengeance on behalf of the common folk who lack the means to undertake the mission themselves. He never considered Red Hood to be a hero; merely a restless phantom with nothing else to bide his time until the sweet release of the afterlife deigned to shatter his manacles to the mortal world. That was until he’d fallen over the sun, offering endless devotion to his goddess, and you’d rewarded his offering with a daughter, a lovely girl. He’d abduct the moon and wrap it in a silken bow if only you’d give him permission.

“Catch, papa,” your daughter had called out, retrieving the little football and sprinting toward him, tiny feet carrying her over the damp and verdant grass of y’all’s backyard. Jason never brought the both of you to parks—an excess of people to watch, different personalities and behaviors; a myriad of possibilities for tragedy. Too much room for error in a vast, leafy expanse.

“You’ve gotta bring it to me first,” Jason called back, outstretching his muscular arms, awaiting her arrival. He was paranoid and distrustful of the world, not a killjoy. Y’all’s daughter’s bedroom was littered with vivid nail polishes, fluffy scarves, glittering tiaras, and Monster High dolls. Your daughter had always adored Frankie Stein and Frankenstein because they reminded her of Jason and herself, the dolls and humans both sharing pale white streaks of hair. He hadn’t known whether to laugh or weep upon hearing those words from her lips, innocent and completely unaware of the accuracies spanning far past hair color.

“Jason, I love you, but we are not cooping ourselves up in the house this summer.” The words were firm and unyielding—but lacking any true bite.

“ I’ve given you grace. I let a lot slide because I understand your background. But we’re just not doing it this summer. Its too hot to not go to waterparks and enjoy ourselves because of possibilities.” A damn good point rested upon your tongue, and he knew it.

“Fine.” He relented with a jocosely petulant huff.” But we take a gun with us.”

Tim Drake is an ambitious father. It’s been said before, but I don’t believe he’s as active as the fandom would believe. Though, his absence isn’t born of malice or indifference, but ambition, a thirst for a legacy. He wants to be a man his significant other and child can be proud of, a father worth bragging about. There’s also a large chamber seated within his mind that knows not how to be a father, for his parents were cold, choosing to throw dollars at his gripes and needs rather than be present.

One of his greatest fears is disappointing the both of you, like he was disappointed by his own parents, so disappointed he couldn’t even despise them. Tragically, the mission to avoid history’s repetition had placed him before a mirror, his parents gazing back at him, a smug smirk curled on their lips because they know that he’ll be on their end of the glass within a few decades.

Can he be blamed? Tim wants the absolute best for his family. The best grades, the best schools, the best scores, the best scholarships. He’s not naïve enough like Dick to believe hard work and persevere can lift a nobody anywhere. There are no bootstraps to be pulled taut. It’s an illusion, a sauce wealthy people spoon over their meals to disguise the taste of nepotism and privilege. Manipulations the rich regurgitate to excuse themselves from having to acknowledge the unfair, biased system they’ve upheld.

The door to his limousine slammed closed, his child seated beside but, but farther than ever. What could be said? Jerking forward, the limousine rolled into drive, coasting beneath autumn streaked clouds, as though her father had gifted her the sky from a florist. Bruce hadn’t prepared Tim for the teenaged terror years. He couldn’t help but wonder if he himself had been this capricious and fickle as a teen, or if he were merely that bad of a father.

“Do. . . do you want a Milkshake? From that one place by the house, like we used to when you were young.” Tim couldn’t help but raise a hopeful raven shaded brow. He could smell the stench of sweat, an anxious perspiration, cleaving to your school uniform. It must’ve been a test day.” I’ll clear the rest of my schedule for us. . . if you want, of course.” He extended an olive branch, granting her the choice to engage and accept, or set the course for the rest her teenage years.

Damian Wayne does not want children. He doesn’t know how far his taint would bleed, and all he can envision are the ways he could disgrace the mind of a child. His village was rotten and evil. Bad fruits bear worse seeds.

Damian’s devotion was love, the purest kind he knew, a primal desire to protect and cherish that of which he adored. You forged suns in his heart, set the butterflies in his belly aflutter. Beneath a weeping of sheet of violet sky, the both of you had sworn to love the other until Earth imploded—and when it did, he would find you in another universe.

He doesn’t hate children. In fact, he would be a decent babysitter for Dick and Jason, and whenever Tim deigned to grace the BatCave with his presence. But, Damian is staunch in his childfree attitude, and you respect it. Truthfully, you weren’t even sure you wanted kids. No, you and Damian battled crime, traveled the world and experienced culture, learned histories outside of the filth pumped into his mind by the Al Ghuls. Bruce was saddened by Damian’s decision against children, but he ultimately respected it—and him.

Damian knew he was poisoned and rotten and always would be, no matter what emblem was sewn over his breast. He was content with the life the both of you had, and knowing Dick, many more children are to come, so he’d never get lonely.” Beloved, what do you make of Italy? Not the tourist parts where the history is washed, but the ripe lands.”

Bruce Wayne is a weary father. He knew the birth of his youngest child was redemption, his last chance at preserving the Wayne name since Damian had sworn off children. But Bruce was aged, hardened, jaded, weary. He had scars to last a lifetime, some worn on his heart, though majority were worn on his skin.

The Wayne brownstone was eerily silent since Alfred’s death. Bruce’s son sat around the oaken table, coloring a picture of Superman, Wonder Woman, Batman, and Alfred. Bruce’s heavy lids fell over exhausted, dim blue irises, his brain flitting back to the memories of Alfred, gathered at the stove and learning a recipe. I am. . . old, Master Bruce. My time on this earth is not infinite. You must learn more than the ways of fists, the words echoed in his mind. Reminding him that old age wasn’t even the murderer of Alfred Pennyworth.

He fetched an inhale before pulling himself off of the couch, and padding over toward his son at the dinner table.” What’s that? Oh, a pretty picture. A real artistic talent, like Damian.” Bruce was unsure of his fathering more often than not. He knew how it appeared to his son’s school counselors and the principal—old, washed up playboy Bruce Wayne saddled with another young son. That was far from the case, but the masses will believe anything when they’re given nothing.

Bruce fetched a pot and skillet from the creaking cabinets of the brownstone, far from the elegance and cleanliness of the manor. Alfred would’ve been mortified to see the mess, he almost chuckled, but withheld it. Lest his son raise a question, for the explanation would be too complicated and long-winded for his young mind.” So, what do you see for dinner tonight? What makes that belly growl like a lion? Mac and Cheese? Lasagna? Hamburger Helper?”

Bruce knew exactly what his son would choose. Asking was merely a courtesy. Bruce knew him, raised the boy from the minute he was weaned. He knew what his son would do before his son knew what he himself would do. The Batman wasn’t a slacker, wasn’t lazy.