#Batboy!Bruce Wayne
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dceuheadcanons · 8 months ago
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HOLD ON. I know I talk a LOT about the boys of the batfam on here, but I have brainrot about a specific woman right now. MARTHA WAYNE. MY POOKS.
So here's another "what if the alleyway went differently" AU. Similar to my Batman!Thomas and Robin!Bruce AU, but instead it's Batman!Martha!!
Except she doesn't go by Batman or Batwoman, letting Bruce go by Batboy. She probably goes by something like Dove (hope symbolism my beloved) ORRR Bluebird (not because I have Dick resemble her a lot in my personal DCEU multiverse or anything whatttt <- lying).
I think she'd probably be a way better parent to Bruce too, making sure he got into a good school, went to therapy, AND got a psychiatrist. She probably sets aside time during the week to hang out with him and never misses a single one. She probably encourages his hobbies, which includes music, dance AND acrobatics & gymnastics. Bruce was taught acrobatics & gymnastics by The Flying Graysons, because he clearly admired them a LOT when she took him to see them!
When Thomas died and told her to run with Bruce, in this universe.. she didn't even hesitate. She kicked off her fancy heels, scooped up her baby, and RAN.
She. She means so much to me. Martha Wayne you will always be famous. I LOVE HER.
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incorrectbatfam · 4 months ago
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The only acceptable trans Tim headcanon would be Tim introducing himself to the batfam as a boy from the get-go with such confidence that no one questions him. Then, his first solo case as Robin is investigating the disappearance of Jack and Janet Drake's "daughter," so he pretends to have a twin sister by forging a bunch of documents and photoshopping family pictures. He then fabricates evidence of her death, committing multiple crimes in the process, and holds a fake funeral at the end. Because if his previous name is dead to him, he's gonna kill it the Tim Drake way
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theaceofarrows · 2 months ago
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12 year old, 4'4ft Jason: Tall people really act like they earned their height
17 year old, 5'10ft Dick: Short people really act like we stole their height
Bruce, internally: [don't laugh, don't laugh, don't laugh-]
-
[Years later]
19 year old, 6'2ft Jason: Hey, remember when I stole your height? Good times
24 year old 5'10 Dick:
Dick: First oF ALL, YOU SASQUATCH SIZED BITCH-
Bruce, internally: [DON'T LAUGH, DON'T LAUGH, DON'T LAUGH-]
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thebat-musicman · 5 months ago
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9 year old Dick: If you’re a friendless loser and you know it, clap your hands!
Bruce:
Dick: Clap. Your. Hands.
Bruce: *clap clap*
———
12 year old Jason: HEY YOU!
Jason: HEEEEEY YOU!
Jason: HEY! YOU!
Bruce: It’s not polite to not call people by their names, Robin.
Jason: Nice try, Hey You. I know my mentor’s name.
———
13 year old Tim: You see this coffee, Bruce?
Bruce: Thank you for making this for m-
Tim: This is my coffee. You are having water. Only people who don’t break mugger’s fingers get coffee.
———
Clark: Batman, your Robins are so polite. They must have been a joy to raise.
Bruce, through clenched teeth: Such a joy.
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chaparro0456 · 5 months ago
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Bruce bringing in Damian in the cave for the first time
Tim: what the fuck Is
Bruce: one language two he’s my son
Jason: wait you can actually have a kid like biologically
Dick:I always thought his canon didn’t work
Tim: one ewww two i thought the whole playboy thing was an act he just payed random ladies to say they did it
Jason: I thought he was gay for Superman
Tim: nah the flash man
Dick: um don’t disrespect, my boy green arrow like that 
They just started arguing with gay batship id better completely forgetting they have a new sibling while Batman is sat there sighing because this has happened more then once’s
Damian : are they always like this
Alfred: I’m afraid so here have a cookie
Damian: ooo cookies
Part 2
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endyfwend · 5 months ago
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Just found a Batman quote, and it sounds like an “incorrect quotes” sorta thing. It’s not. Batman, THE Batman, has actually said “Ya basic”
… I’m crying
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nosyrobin · 2 months ago
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Teddy bear!reader who’s trapped in the Wayne household.
Teddy bear!reader who’s practically some weird cuddly entity that resembles a teddy bear with a human form
Teddy bear!reader who has to endure all the venting, ranting the batfamily has to tell them. They can’t help but frown as it starts to get draining.
Teddy bear!reader who’s always hugged when seen. They can’t get out of the tight hold the boys get them into to. Even Bruce doesn’t let them go easily.
Teddy bear!reader who has a chip in them, shocking them when they don’t keep up the “happy bear” facade. You’re supposed to be the cute teddy they love.
Teddy bear!reader forced to be into human form so one of the boys can take them out and spoil them. But it’s only to show others that you belong to them if you somehow escape them.
Teddy bear!reader who’s starting to crack. The cuddly teddy is starting to be a grizzly bear.
————-
But that only stops when you get shocking pain in your neck. You roar, clawing at your own skin and fur. You transform between bear and human. Dick frowns as he hold the controller down. Damian could only hold a scowl watching his beloved animal act out.
Jason sits watching you beg for the pain to stop, Tim could only smile. Bruce has a hand on Dick’s shoulder. He squeezed it seeing you about to pass you. Dick stops the shocking pain.
You whimper, holding your arms. You feel your claws poke your own bruised body. Bruce kneels down, lifting your head as you flinch at his touch. “Our poor teddy….” He says lowly, he shows pity more than guilt.
It makes you sick as you try and roar at him, growl. Anything. But in the corner of your eye, you see Dick ready to press the button. You immediately stopped trying to fight. “You seem cranky..” Bruce says, he then helps you sit up as Damian moves by his father.
“Father, maybe it’s time for them to eat some honey?” He questions.
Honey…it’s not honey. It’s a drug to make you loopy. To make you obey them. To make you happy and do anything they wish to do to you.
To make you their perfect little teddy bear.
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A/N: UH OH??? DID I EAT? OR DID I EAT🗣️‼️
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sodamnbored · 19 days ago
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Jason, bumping into him on the street: Stalker says what.
Dick, snorting: Shut up. I’m on an errand for Bruce. You can come help me if you like.
Jason shrugging, falling into step: Sure. What’re we looking for?
Dick: Batmobile’s busted. He needs us to go find a tool.
Tim: *casually heading the other way, minding his own business*
Jason, yoinking a disgruntled Tim back by his collar: Well that was easy.
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olailamajnoon · 1 month ago
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Headcanon: Jason, after coming back from the dead, decides to fuck with Bruce for revenge and also because it slaps, but mostly for revenge ykwim
Bruce blames coffee and lack of sleep for the fact that the pizza delivery boy looks like Jason, the club bouncer looks like Jason, the clerk in Damian's school looks like Jason
Jason: here's your pizza, mister *shoves it into Bruce's face*
Bruce: 😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫 can I ask your name
Jason: Percy, but everyone just calls me Purse. Like in "cut purse"
Bruce: *under his breath* jesus, you even SOUND like him
Jason, wide innocent eyes popping out of his chiseled man face: you okay dude?
Bruce, convinced he's finally lost his mind, but still holding on to the "illusion": Do you want to come inside?
Jason, deadpan: dude you're rich white and famous, you really think imma let you take me inside your gargantuan Gothic mansion? Being killed one time's enough
Bruce, turning around: *wHaT dId YoU sAy*
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91-1lover · 10 months ago
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What if Damian and Tim love each other and even like? It's just more of a situation "Manipulating others is easier ". Maybe an example will help;
Damian: Father, May I go to Zoo today?
Bruce:No Damian, you're grounded.
Tim:Oh, that's bad. I could go with you to take photos of otter, but if you are not going I think I will stay too. What's a zoo without company. Maybe I will go with Kon next week.
Bruce *Super happy in a moment of thinking his youngest kids getting along*: If you two agree not to kill each other, Damian can go
Tim and Damian:*Knowing looks*
Or situation like;
Tim who has abandoned issues and is having fear of people leaving him: Dick is mad at me. Can you stab me so he will be in his mother hen mode Instead?
Damian who would like to have 5 minutes of peace from Grayson: Say no more
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incorrectbatfam · 30 days ago
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Yknow how lions will sometimes pretend that their cubs' biting hurts and stuff as a form of encouragement
Imagine that but like
Robin!Dick: *bap*
Bruce: *dramatically throws himself into a shelf*
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theaceofarrows · 1 month ago
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Nightwing and Robin Jason: On your mark, get set g-
Batman: No
Nightwing: No? No, what? You don't even know what we're doing?!
Batman: You two were about to try and race across the rooftops
Nightwing: And? We do it all the time
Batman: And, they're covered in ice from freezing rain
Robin Jason: So? We fought Mr. Freeze last week, and we're still alive
Batman: [glares]
Dick: Ugh, fine. We won't have ANY fun
Batman: [turns around]
Nightwing:
Robin Jason:
Nightwing and Robin Jason: [glance at each other]
Nightwing and Robin Jason: [whispering] Go
[Both start running]
-
[Later]
Dick: [sitting on the couch with his ankle in a cast] Consequences, gotta be my top three least favorite parts of my actions
Jason: [sitting next to him with his arm in a cast] Big brothers, gotta be the top three worst people to listen to when they say they have a fun idea
Dick: You're just grumpy because YOU fell down first
Jason: [hits him with a pillow]
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plethorawrites · 2 months ago
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How the batboys would react to you labeling them as your property.
---___---___---___---___---___---___---___---___---_
Bruce: You'd been helping Alfred label things in the attic all day and at the end, you print one extra, pressing a sticker that had "Property of—" your name written on it. You stuck it on the breast pocket of his suit before an event you weren't able to go to because of other obligations, just to make sure no one else would try to flirt with him and he didn't even notice until halfway through the evening. It was the most peace and quiet he'd gotten in a while (Aside from a picture in the press with a headline that read "BRUCE WAYNE SO SMITTEN HE'S BECOMING PROPERTY".) When he got home, he gave you a small disapproving glare and pulled it off, watching you frown dramatically. A few days later he hands you a small box with the label inside of it, properly laminated and made into a little pin for him to wear to any event you couldn't be there for.
---
Dick: You bought a label maker and were OBSESSED with it, to say the least. What started as a project to organize some cabinets and spices turned into the entire apartment becoming labeled with item names or the stuff that specifically belonged to him or you. You labeled your milk, because you knew he'd finish your very specific kind without caring. You labeled your hairbrush, in hopes he'd stop getting his hair in it whenever he used yours because he couldn't find his. And you labeled him. He frowned, feeling you place something on his back and shrugged his jacket off, checking to see what it was. Your name had been printed on a label, attached to it his jacket. He smirked in amusement, watching you shrug lightly as if you had no idea why he was grinning. Then, he pulled it back on, taking the label maker from you and officially revoking your privileges as he offered to take you lunch, not bothering to pull the label off.
---
Jason: You were bored, watching from the couch as he read quietly one evening in his favorite chair. You spent all day organizing stuff around the apartment on his day off with him occasionally looking up to glance at you before turning a page. When you were finally done, he was still reading, almost at the end of the book in his hands. You fiddled with the label maker, pressing some buttons and printing out your name next to the words 'loves Jason' and then stuck it to his sleeve. He didn't even glance at it. So you printed another. And another. Until his sleeve was mostly full, so you stuck the next one on his cheek. That finally broke him and his lips tugged into a reluctant smile, having known the entire time what label you'd been attaching to him. He set the finished book down and pulled the label maker out of your hand, printing one that said he loves you in return, and sticking it on your shoulder before getting up and tackling you on the couch, his arms wrapping around your waist, tickling you as he buried his face in your neck while you laughed.
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allthegothihopgirls · 11 months ago
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bruce wayne dropping in on the batboy's conversations randomly, hoping that he'll hear something intellectual or interesting, but instead gets hit with the stupidest shit he's ever heard in his life, every time.
jason: "hey dick can you tell tim that armadillos aren't real?"
dick: "...why would i tell him that???"
jason: "because he thinks they're real?"
dick: "jason."
tim: "I TOLD YOU!!!"
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batfamilycannons · 11 months ago
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Bruce *storming in, burnt and covered in ash*: Where is your brother?
Damian and Tim: tf??
Tim: uh I think Jason’s in the library?
Bruce: no not him the other one
Dick, *scurries past the door*
Bruce: RICHARD JOHN GRAYSON why did you set my bed on fire
Dick: You deserve it!!
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eclips-moon · 3 months ago
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The Batboys being clingy headcanon:
Including Duke and Bruce <3
Hope you guys like it!
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Tim Drake Tim’s clinginess is low-key, but it’s also constant. He’s the type to text you “What’s up? I miss you <3” while you’re just sitting 5 feet away from him. If you so much as stand up to go get a snack, he’s immediately there, like, “Where are you going? Don’t leave me.” He’ll lean against you, his hand finding yours without him even realizing it. When you're watching TV or reading, he’s definitely leaning into your side, trying to get as close as possible without being too obvious. But if you move to shift positions? Nope, he’s following you. He’ll slip his arm around your waist, all like, “Don’t think I didn’t notice that.” He’s not a big PDA guy, but when it’s just the two of you? Prepare for cuddles, hand-holding, and small, random kisses. He’s gotta be touching you constantly.
Jason Todd Jason is obsessive, no doubt. He’s that partner who’ll try to act like he’s tough and independent, but the moment you show him any kind of affection, he’s all over you. Like, you can’t just hug him. No. He’ll climb into your lap and basically trap you there, rubbing his face into your neck like a cat. He’s gonna constantly ask for kisses, too, but not just little pecks—he wants full-on, deep kisses where he can pull you close and remind you that you’re his. If you’re doing something, like, working or even hanging out with friends, he’ll try to drag you away, be like, “Hey, come hang out with me, stop ignoring me for two seconds.” He’s possessive, but in the cutest way, constantly needing your attention. If you even talk to another person for too long, he’ll give them side-eye and pull you back to him like, “You good? You’re not gonna leave me for some random guy, are you?” He’s also the type to cling to you in bed, hogging the covers and curling up like a human koala.
Dick Grayson Dick’s clingy energy is pure gold. He’s the most affectionate of the bunch and doesn’t shy away from public displays of love. He loves hugging you from behind, nuzzling into your neck, and just randomly planting kisses all over your face. He’ll text you “miss you <3” every few hours when you’re apart, and when you’re together? It’s all about touch. He’s sitting on your lap, or leaning on your shoulder, or pulling you into his chest just because he needs to be close to you. If you’re watching a movie, he’s definitely going to have his head in your lap, just to be as close to you as humanly possible. He gets giddy when he gets attention from you, too. You could be playing with his hair, and he’ll melt. He’ll whine like, “I’m not clingy, you’re clingy. But also, I love it. So don’t stop.” Honestly, Dick doesn’t care if he’s acting like a bit of a puppy—he’s obsessed with you, and he makes sure you know it.
Damian Wayne Damian’s clingy moments are hilariously dramatic. He might start out cold, acting like he doesn’t need anyone, but as soon as you show him any affection? He’s all in. He’ll randomly grab your hand and hold it like it’s the most important thing in the world. If you try to walk away from him for whatever reason, he’ll growl and pull you back in, like, “Where are you going? You’re staying right here.” He has this whole vibe of “I don’t need anyone else, just you”, so if you’re talking to someone else or looking away from him for too long, he’ll wrap his arm around your waist and be like, “I don’t think you should be talking to them. They might steal you away from me.” In bed? He’s a hug monster, wrapping his arms around you like he’s never letting you go. He’s all about the intimacy, though—when it’s just the two of you, he’ll be soft and surprisingly vulnerable, making sure you know that he needs you more than he lets on.
Duke Thomas Duke is lowkey super clingy, but in the way that’s goofy and endearing. He loves to follow you around, like, just wherever you go, he’s tagging along. You’re going to the kitchen? He’s there. To grab something from the laundry room? He’s there. If you sit down, he’s sitting on the floor next to you, asking if you want to “cuddle and watch dumb shows together.” He’s always finding excuses to touch you—like, his hand will just casually rest on your knee or he’ll come up behind you and play with your hair. And if you don’t give him attention? He’ll pout, even if he’s trying to play it off, like, “Aren’t you gonna give me a kiss? C’mon, don’t leave me hanging.” He’s the type who’ll give you a silly smile, lean in for a kiss, and then pull you into a full-on hug like, “Don’t go. I’m not done with you yet.” He’s all about the hugs, especially after a long day. You’ll be just chilling, and suddenly he’s like, “Hug time, right? Let me get one.”
Bruce Wayne Now, Bruce is not the type to openly admit he’s clingy. He’s still the stoic, brooding billionaire who’s been through a lot, but when it’s just the two of you? He’s softer than anyone expects. He’ll always make sure you’re physically close—his hand on your lower back, your legs touching when you sit next to him, and if he’s standing near you, his hand will casually rest on your arm. When you’re working late or doing something serious, Bruce will occasionally pull you away for a few minutes just to kiss you or hold you close. He’s not great at asking for attention, but when he’s feeling clingy, he’ll show you through little gestures. You’ll find him just sitting beside you in silence, just content to be in your presence. He’s a man of few words, but when he’s clingy, it’s all about the touch—the way he holds your hand, how he presses his shoulder to yours, and how he’ll insist on driving you home or waiting up for you, just to make sure you’re safe.
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