#AND WTF HAPPENED TO CAPITALIZATION!!?!

[snailification]

Idk who needs to hear this, but the reason your fic isn't getting a lot of attention is bc it's one big block!!

[annoyinganarchopunk]

i know one of the big things with me being punk is that im meant to be political but why is literally every geopolitical event possible currently happening

dude i havent even had my first kiss yet and governments are already collapsing left and right like DAMN GIVE ME A MINUTE holy shit

[unnamed-atlas]

Not cub inventing the minecraft equivalent of the printing press and immediately deciding to use it with the purpose of creating false scarcity lmao

[aceoffangirls]

The fact that abortion was even part of the discussion in the Queensland state election shows the impact US politics have in Australia....

[hi-im-greenjunipertree]

Please stop

I've gotten this same exact copypasta in my inbox like three times today. And it has repeated for more than a WEEK from several different "accounts."

I've said it before and I'll say it again: Last time I checked, most people who need help who are in Gaza and are asking for donations do NOT harass random strangers in their inboxs/dms. If this message is in your inbox or in your dms, it is most likely a scam.

I'm going to make a collection of screenshots calling these accounts' out if they keep bugging me in my dms because I am DONE with these accounts.

[clowningaroundmars]

lots of stores shutting down and businesses going bankrupt in my state....

kinda nervous not bc of of corps dying but bc this country has historically been terrible about leaving vacant storefronts and parking lots collecting dust and weeds for years!

places that could be used for housing, community centers, etc just sittin there 😔

[unrepentantly-weird]

on a slightly lighter note, after reading/writing this last night, it was nice to go to work this morning and squint up at the procter & gamble headquarters across the street and go “the sun is already up, it’s hard to tell… do they still have… yes! the rainbow lights!”

context: p&g, umbrella company of Every Cleaning Brand You Know, has been lighting up their hq every june all june for years. (they also do a red-no lights-green pattern in february for Black History Month, and they do other things too of course.) it’s performative sure, but as someone who remembers the Before Times it still makes me smile. it looks like this but red-yellow-green-blue-purple-pink:

so i was fully prepared to rip into Tumblr for trying to pull its "queerest place on the internet" rainbow capitalism bullshit again this year... but it's actually feeling kind of disconcerting that it doesn't seem like they've actually done anything for Pride, as far as i can tell...

[fiveisthedaddyhere]

uuuuh hey guys im not okay

[dravidious]

God fucking damnit DuckDuckGo just added ai

[the-lorax-mustache]

Saw this in the wild today.

I have… questions

[etheralisi]

I’ve been thinking about in-universe media so. Heh. Why don’t we tumblrify the ending of the rottmnt movie

Update: here’s part 2 and 3+3.5

💫silent_swirl Follow

Nice knowing you guys

🥐ittybittyypastrypuff Follow

Wtf??? Where do you live?

⏱️lordoftimeandspace Follow

You can’t just ask someone where they live

💰rhymeonthedime Follow

op must be from new york. i’ve been trying to text my sister who lives there all day and when she finally gets back to me, it’s to send me a photo of her being chased by some weird??? fleshy???? car? i think the pink stuff was growing inside of it?

🥐ittybittyypastrypuff Follow

The hell is happening in your city?

🔥guess-ill-die Follow

The end of the world

🐛lugbugg Follow

🎙️do-re-mimimi Follow

Where else would you learn that?

14,056 notes

🚀jj-sails Follow

Alien invasion???? This is not how Jupiter Jim said it would go

267 notes

🦙dramallama Follow

So who had alien invasion on the 2020 apocalypse bingo card

🤠see-you-in-space-cowboy Follow

At this point no one is surprised 

#give it two months. somehow something will find a way to top this

12,435 notes

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

I lived bitch

🌑faded-moonlight Follow

Context?

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

No ✨

43 notes

🎨 asprinkleofrazzmatazz Follow

Sorry everyone  ::> ︵ <:: No more art until my hands are healed up. Doctor’s orders

🧸bear-with-me Follow

Are you okay? 🥺🥺💞

🎨 asprinkleofrazzmatazz Follow

♡ ♡ Achy. But I realllllly want to drawwwwwww

#I have so many ideas right now #currently trying and failing to draw with feet #but I am determined 

226 notes

👾aliens-among-us Follow

Time to storm Area 51 again

#they can’t stop all of us #look I just want to see aliens in person okay #if they can’t invade my city then what’s the point #I know they have to be keeping some of those pink blobs in there

67 notes

🟦 outoftouchoutoftime Follow

Hello

🏒 hockeyordeath Follow

JUNIOR! HELLO

I SEE YOU HAVE DISCOVERED THE INTERNET

🟦 outoftouchoutoftime Follow

It’s Sensei’s fault

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

#I?????? #don’t just look at me it was purple too

5 notes

🛸 atomiclass9000 Follow

I smell the scent of betrayal in the air.

#not science posting #blue I’m looking at you

77 notes

✍️writingprompts Follow

You are a time traveller sent back to stop the apocalypse before it ever began. Only problem is: you aren’t sent back far enough.

🟦 outoftouchoutoftime Follow

Relatable 

💥zipzapzoom Follow

Umm???

4,522 notes

🕜has-lou-jitsu-been-found-yet Follow

Day 3667 of me posting: no

🪽angelofhell Follow

Wow this blog is dedicated

101 notes

🐝 dizzee-bee Follow

Why do aliens always invade NYC? What’s so special? Why don’t they ever invade Las Vegas huh? What about Boston? Where are my aliens in D.C? So many cities and you’re telling me they chose New York? If aliens really did invade I bet you they wouldn’t even come near it

🐝 dizzee-bee Follow

This post… aged

🐾 ultimate_cataclysm  Follow

Pay up op

1,356 notes

🦊redfoxtrott Follow

there’s something weird going on in this city. remember that time at the stadium? suddenly it’s a free for all on world domination i swear

🪩glitter-jam Follow

I thought the whole stadium thing was a publicity stunt

👋saysayonara Follow

I thought that was a rogue cosplayer 

#for real though. What even happened to them?

11,388 notes

🌎yes-the-earth-is-flat Follow

Wow. So tumblr thinks it can gaslight me int thinking aliens exits huh? Well think again

🌎yes-the-earth-is-flat Follow

Stop bringing up my username. You know im right

2,488 notes

🏒 hockeyordeath Follow

NO, MY KEYBOARD IS NOT STUCK LIKE THIS. EVERY LETTER I TYPE IS AS IT IS MEANT TO BE SAID. WITH PURPOSE AND VOLUME.

🏒 hockeyordeath Follow

IF MY USERNAME COULD BE IN CAPITALS YOU KNOW IT WOULD BE 

��� atomiclass9000 Follow

I can help with this

#give me one minute and some flavourless juice

122 notes

💃disco-girl Follow

My apartment was almost flattened by a giant freakin robot a few years back. And now aliens????? I’m moving

#guys I’m just. So. Done with all of this

67 notes

🎙️do-re-mimimi Follow

So did the aliens just up and leave? What’s the story here?

🎩man-with-a-top-hat Follow

There have been various sightings of lights across the sky. I have not been able to find any reliable sources on the cause, but the general consensus is the lights pushed the aliens back where they came from. 

🦇batarang Follow

This photo of some person swinging around the city has been making rounds on twitter

🐚seashellsshesells Follow

Pretty lights and vigilantes? 

5,993 notes

❌cant-think-of-a-user Follow

So what are we calling these aliens? They need a cool, alien sounding name ‘cuz all I’ve been seeing around is ‘land squids’, ‘brain goop’ and shoutout to that one discord user who used the words ‘pink gelatinous parsnip’ to describe them.

👊punch-moodi Follow

Have they ever seen a parsnip before?

🤏deadly-nerve-pinch Follow

What about Utroms? They kinda look like the aliens from Jupiter Jim’s Last Trip to the Moon 9

❌cant-think-of-a-user Follow

Isn’t your fandom super dead?

🤏deadly-nerve-pinch Follow

Say that to our 80+ movies. Your faves could never 

🚀jj-sails Follow

Fandom still going strong 💪 

🍎almond-apple Follow

Why does everyone keep on calling them aliens? Are we sure they’re not just failed government test subjects? Haven’t there been mutant sightings in NYC before?

❌cant-think-of-a-user Follow

Sorry, mutants???

👾aliens-among-us Follow

Nah it’s defo aliens

❌cant-think-of-a-user Follow

#so far 3 votes for Utroms and 22 for parsnips #sigh

3,751 notes

🫎duck-duck-moose Follow

Children are terrifying 

💤needsomezzzzzzz Follow

Agreed. But I feel like there’s a story here

🫎duck-duck-moose Follow

Was walking back from work, and I was like nearly home right? I turn a corner and there: a sea of cheering girl scouts. Who are they cheering on you ask? Their… cult (?) leader? Tearing one of those aliens apart with her bare hands. And the kids are just laughing and some are even joining in? They must have nerves of steel

💤needsomezzzzzzz Follow

Woah

🌽 sherlock_corn Follow

@  HOCKEYORDEATH Hey look at this

372 notes

💀outoftouchoutoftime Follow

Set a profile picture because apparently everyone’s blocking me thinking I’m a bot?

🥊 red_hotsoup Follow

Sorry CJ

9 notes

asprinkleofrazzmatazz said: Spread the sunshine ☀️ Post this in at least 5 ask boxes to let them know they make you happy

🥊 red_hotsoup Follow

Aww, hey Orange

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

Hey, where’s my ask

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

Orange?

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

Oh 

10 notes

asprinkleofrazzmatazz said: Spread the bugs 🪳 Post this in at least 5 ask boxes to let them know they’re bugging you

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

Two can play at this game

🎨asprinkleofrazzmatazz Follow

Jk ☀️☀️☀️

29 notes

🛸 atomiclass9000 Follow

I remember the good old days on tumblr. Back when my brothers didn’t know the name of my account. Back when they didn’t bug me in my inbox

🍞shortbutsweetbread Follow

Then make another one?

🛸 atomiclass9000 Follow

Gasp. And leave behind a username such as this? I’m attached.

🌽 sherlock_corn Follow

What about your sister?

🛸 atomiclass9000 Follow

You’re fine

⚔️ bluejitsu Follow

Favouritism 

128 notes

🐱sophinophie Follow

Whoever you heroes are

Thank you.  

❤️🧡💜💙

#I don’t know how you did it. Or what you even look like #but one thing is for sure and that’s that you are heroes 

189 notes

[aerequets]

randomly remembered the time when I was 9 or 10 years old and in a Huge online game phase (think club penguin, fantage, Poptropica, etc). my fixation at the time of this memory was fantage, which, for those who don't know, was basically a dress-up game where you could also interact with other players and play games and whatnot.

so I was Obsessed. like begging my dad for memberships (he finally got me one for one month. it cost $6) and beelining straight to fantage when I got home from school and acting like the pixelated clothing items I got for my pixelated avatar were truly treasure. like this was my second world guys. My... happiness? No, not my happiness, but maybe my sanity hinged on this online game.

now one thing about fantage was that they had censored words, like cuss words, because it was a game for kids. if you said something, it could result in a temporary ban, or, if what you said was REAL bad, a permanent ban on your account.

anyways, people found a neat little trick where if you said the word 'sexy' (not a cuss word but also not something you want kids to be using?) the game would automatically convert it to 'cool'. and I was ALL OVER this trick. For some reason 9 year old me found it the funniest thing in the world to see 'sexy' written in the chat bar (which, by the way, I didn't even really know what it meant) only for the word 'cool' to come up in my speech bubble instead. I even started experimenting. what if I wrote 'exy'? (nothing.) what if it was capitalized? (COOL.)

what if I wrote 'sex'?

probably because it isn't a bad word, the orange pop-up of doom only declared I was banned for 24 hours instead of forever. but I can still remember the sheer panic and horror 9 year old me felt at that sight. I was Banned.

i guess 9 year old me also didn't have any foresight, because instead of 1) considering it was only a day long ban, I could wait and 2) considering it was only a day long ban, NOBODY HAD TO KNOW, I instead ran straight to my mom with tears running down my face and loudly asked "IS S E X A BAD WORD?" mind you, I spelled it out S-E-X because I was under the impression that banned fantage words would somehow also get me banned from real life.

my mother, bless her soul, only looked horrified as her sniveling 9 year old stood there after asking that question. after asking the normal questions (where did you hear that, what happened) and getting a hold on the situation, all she said was "Yes it's a bad word" and left it at that. Im glad she didn't put any stock into my panic over being banned for ONE DAY because wtf was I actually doing.

anyways moral of the story?? practice safe sexy I guess idk I have no idea why I was like that

[lesamis]

1810s dashboard but it's niche drama

💛 heartofanna Following

imagine cancelling someone for saying war is bad

🧵 sharethewoe Follow

#didn't expect better from w*rdsworth but some people i rly thought i could count on…… #anyway we will live to see this empire fall. can't stop history lol (via @heartofanna)

speaking as someone who was press ganged at the age of 17 to serve in his majesty's royal navy i couldn't be more grateful for your poem. young men like me are cannon fodder and you spoke for so many of us. fuck napoleon but fuck parliament even more.

86 notes

chatterpwned-deactivated78345629743

stable forgiving virtuous flourishing in my lane definitely not buying poison moisturized unbothered never been better

chatterpwned-deactivated78345629743

me when i lie

179302 notes

🏛 mynoseisfine Follow

Settling this once and for all. What does the public actually think about the Parthenon marbles debate:

🦉 realminerva Follow

lol i know it’s you lord elgin

🦉 realminerva Follow

like we joke and all but fully aside from the fact that removing the sculptures from greek soil was vulturine and opportunistic etc, it’s really just the tip of a frankly gigantic mountain of imperialist bullshit. let’s not pretend we haven’t been brutally killing hundreds who resisted oppression in india, LITERALLY BOMBED A NEUTRAL EUROPEAN CAPITAL, and embarrassed ourselves in the charge against napoleon for years now. pathetic ass empire & evil as hell to boot. @mynoseisfine the greeks who carved your marbles millennia ago would kick your tory ass so hard

3661 notes

🎀 emmawoodhousestan Follow

how do i still keep seeing thomas chatterton's final post being reblogged, wtf is wrong with you freaks??? he was seventeen it was tragic and horrible and happened ages ago. he was a kid just let him rest

294 notes

🍎 masque-off Following

callout post for @castleyeah @lordsidmouth @officialcoe @parliamentofficial: they oppress, murder and famish the british working people & also suck majorly

⛪ castleyeah Follow

sour cuz you’re unfit to have custody of your own kids huh

🍎 masque-off Following

proud to be the dad of a newborn who could already rend your pudding spine asunder with a mere glance

187 notes

🦆 mallardturner Following

finished this today 😊

44 notes

😎 chadeharold Follow

why is it always “you’re risking your life and legacy & will get yourself killed before the age of five and twenty” and never how was swimming the hellespont the hellespont looked fun was it fun

🎭 loved-joanna Mutuals

ohhh my god you swam the hellespont five years ago?? wooow should we tell everyone?? should we throw a party?? should we invite famous hero of greek myth leander who swam the hellespont

😎 chadeharold Follow

@loved-joanna look we never had any beef & don’t have to start this now. it’s cool that you’re sticking up for my ex, you guys were friends first, but just know that i’ve always trusted your opinion on my work & genuinely respect and admire you & would still be up for a collab whenever.

🎭 loved-joanna Mutuals

yea sure why don’t your lips collab with my ass

😎 chadeharold Follow

on it boss

1009 notes

#literally call me. down if you are

🍂 endymion Follow

sorry is it me or is the assassin who stabbed german bootleg wordsworth kinda…… 🥵

💄 biprincesscharlotte Mutuals

JOHN KEATS????????

2427 notes

#i'm p sure this is the author of lamia thirstposting on main??? help

🌾 huntsmanx Follow

romanticism this romanticism that why don’t you romanticise universal suffrage and rights for labouring people

🌾 huntsmanx Follow

anyone else in jail for seditious libel

🏹 axelaidtotheroot Mutuals

lmao i'm one of the “anyone else”s and i know you’re enjoying family visits and apparently some kind of cushy armchair situation, plus tons of books. try being in here as a spencean dude they won’t even let me learn how to write. worst of all some evangelical came by yesterday just to proselytize & put me “on the right path” fml

8341 notes

🗻 mounttambora Follow

y'all i don't feel so good :/

59 notes

[devildomwriter]

Obey Me As Tumblr #29

MC: I love bears they’re so fucking big and dumb

Leviathan: I thought you were a lesbian?

MC: I am talking about the animal!!!!!!!!!!!!

Satan: This is kind of the opposite of straight people forgetting gays exist

•

Beelzebub: *me inhaling pure Neon into my body by sucking it out of an ‘open’ sign at a store: Hhhhhhhhh

Satan: Wtf

Beelzebub: I felt I was pretty clear

•

Mammon: Guy about to invent mayonnaise: damn I wish this sandwich tasted bad :/

Solomon: Op’s never had pizza with mayonnaise

Mammon: OP’s never throttled someone to death with their bare hands either but unlike what you said, that can change any second

•

Asmodeus: When in doubt slap His ass

Simeon: His is capitalized….are you talking about god’s ass?

Mammon: Are you in doubt? Just slap His ass

•

Mammon: Not to sound like a dr*gon but I do want your gold and I am going to lay on top of it in a pile inside a cave

Diavolo: Why did you censor dragon?

Mammon: Townsfolk may find it scary

•

MC: Killed a spider n now I feel bad :/

Mammon: Give birth to a spider to make up for it

Mammon: Why did I say that?

MC: Why did you say that

•

Luke: Hey everyone it’s 5:30 pm

Solomon: It’s 8:24 where I am

Luke: I decide the rules

Mammon: Rules are more like guidelines, fool

•

Asmodeus: How sharp is your knife (flirting)

Solomon: Come find out (flirting intensifies)

•

Diavolo: When people start having long random conversations on my posts, my initial thought is “I’m glad these two are having a nice talk” but then I investigate further and almost 100% of the time they’re both horny and role playing historical figures

Diavolo: You all wish I was joking

•

Solomon: 2025 bullies be like “give me your lunch coins or I’ll unsub from your dad’s onlyfans”

Leviathan: Posts that can cause physic damage

•

Satan: I am sending pain vibes your way. You will feel a lil discomfort on your leg

Mammon: Ouch

Satan: Yeah

•

Luke: What happens when you become tumblr famous?

Leviathan: So much happens

Simeon: Like what?

Solomon: So much??? God did you even read the post

Leviathan: Get his ass

•

Simeon: The best fruits are hardest to open

Beelzebub: This fucking bowling ball is gonna be delicious I know it

•

Solomon: YMCA but instead of young man they say comrade and YMCA is USSR

MC: Comrade, steel production is down

Solomon: I said comrade, you must sleep on the ground

•

Diavolo: You think I have a choice? I have to be real

Mammon: This isolated message makes me feel like I’m about to be shot and killed

MC: This reminds me of grandma

Mammon: Hi! What does this mean?

•

Thirteen: God I wish there was a wasteland I could banish people to

Mammon: It’s the afterlife, sis

Thirteen: You’re right! I could simply murder and kill the people I don’t like! Why didn’t I think of this?

•

Mammon: Want a gf but I ain’t prepared… I’ve not land to give, no cattle…

Last • Next

[noitsbecky127]

rebecca watches ds9: rules of acquisition

time for some ferengi chaos i guess!

who the fuck is this guy

morn apparently. wild night at quark’s probably

what the fuck are the ferengi doing. what is this game. what is the goal here

my dad just went “this game makes no sense”

why is JADZIA here, doesn’t she have better things to be doing (like maybe kira)

quark if you lay one orange finger on jadzia i will reach through the screen and kill you myself

she has 300 years of experience, don’t try to beat her in anything ever

i love how she isn’t taking the sexist bullshit

is quark getting drugged rn

what kind of magic thirst-inducing pill is this

wtf does the grand nagus want with quark now

time to introduce capitalism to the gamma quadrant!

did the nagus just snort space coke. is that a normal thing to do before a meeting

get his ass kira

zek that’s a lesbian

that’s a fuckton of nitrate

ferengi don’t do gifts i don’t think

benjamin sisko the man that you are

so the grand plan to make money is just wine? that seems deceptively simple

tulaberriessss

obsessed with the crazy straw in that drink

i want to drink smth out of a crazy straw now. haven’t done that in like 15 years

rom stop firing pel

rom: et tu, quark?

pel’s got a solid room here

what’s with the fake ears??? ferengi beauty standards?????

nOPE WE’VE GOT A 24TH-CENTURY MULAN OVER HERE

good for her!!! hope she gets everything she wants out of this

zek if you touch kira again i’ll kill you before she can

interesting gamma quadrant aliens we’ve got here

is that face paint or are they just like that

damn pel is kickass

what kind of alien is zek’s servant guy anyway

how fucking tall is that actor. terry farrell is like six feet tall and he towers over her

oh god is zek trying to charm kira

everything she is saying about ferengi is correct. jadzia you should care more about misogyny

i don’t think kira should have to have fun with a bunch of sexist assholes actually!

100k vats is not happening. that simply cannot happen.

pel what is your brilliant plan to get those 100k vats

ok that quark bedroom anecdote is just creepy

jadzia: tf do you mean you’re a woman i thought you were just gay

pel please do not get with quark. pel you can do better. pel please

kira needs to kill zek

what in god’s name is their plan for 100k vats. do they have a plan

i wonder if maybe zek’s just trying to test quark or smth

what is odo doing now

odo’s hatred of quark is comical i love him

oh god rom what are you planning

oh god oh fuck

oh lord rom’s gonna mess everything up for my new favorite ferengi

why do these aliens keep attacking each other

“you are starting to annoy me” yeah he’s quark that’s what he does

wtf did quark just do

i wouldn’t be surprised if they just didn’t have 100k vats

tf is pel doing

why won’t she let him sleep

girl you can do so much better than him. you would be so much better off without him

yep i was right! there aren’t 100k vats

what the fuck is the dominion

quark has decided that that whole kiss thing never happened. he has his priorities in order

i would very much like to know the secrets of the dominion

but what’s the percentage? .01%?

quark passing out when he finds out pel is female is hilarious

pel please. pel take the latinum and leave.

yes, start packing, that misogynist does not deserve your time

GET HIS ASS PEL

i think she’s satisfied yeah

i hope pel has a great time in the gamma quadrant

[mochinomnoms]

The idea of a octotrio polycule is so cute Mochi pliz hear my rambling

Why settling for one when you can get a buy one get two for free deal?

I can't think of much ideas other than the situation that Azul does something similar to what happened in book three so now they are punished by not getting cuddles the most decent option is to actually put your foot down and keep the punishment even if your boyfriends cry out about how "working at the lounge was so exhausting! Please spare some cuddles for these three poor fishies!!" and even if some of your friends call you out (Jack for Jade, Ace for Floyd +Jamil, Azul for literally anyone?) because they are causing trouble:

Jade keeps following around Jack to ask him questions about beastfolks (I think this happened in the playful land event Jade wanted to make Jack wear silly clothes) he is willing to drag anyone you know into hearing his fully dramatized history of your harsh punishment and it comes with the incredible acting skills of Jade Leech!!

Floyd isn't even trying to even walk to every other activity he does it looks like he does it against his own will (on classes, on club activities) and that's why Ace told you about the latest club practice where Floyd just stayed face first on the gymnasium floor? Please prefect Jamil is about to invent new seafood dishes from how much annoyed he is with this "squiggly, slimy bastard eel"

Speaking of slimy eels... Epel called you because he discovered the whole reason why Vil has been more snappy than usual is Azul not being able to provide his moisturizer because "My workers and myself are in a heavy emotional break, I am afraid that we will be canceling production until stated otherwise.." he genuinely made a little domino line that ends connecting to you and your personal friends?

Of course that's the more decent option of you still going along with the punishment I am saying decent because the other option is to give up and get teased by the tweels and getting your time and affection fully capitalized by your octo darling

After the punishment is over (if you actually have decency and choose the first option) surprisingly when the three immediately drag you to the usual cuddle session everything is planned to fit each of your likings the series you three been watching/a movie playing in the tv, tasty snacks and a thing similar to a pillow fort/a nest? Filled with soft blankets and couches for the best of the best cuddle sections and after this everything will go back to its regular flow!!

(i want to force my brain to have more ideas for this dynamic but I haven't come up with anything else)

BUY ONE GET TWO FREE ASKJDKLAJSFKJGLGJ

They are a delightful package deal, tbh. But they guilt you for your affections so often, it's a miracle that you haven't wrung their necks yet.

They indeed make it everyone else's problem when you decide to ban them from any form of affection other than quick cheek kisses and handholding. But it's 10 times worse when only one or two of them are banned, but the others aren't.

Floyd gets in trouble with you a lot because he tends to bite into you a bit harder than he should, leaving deep marks. It's not the marking itself that's the issue, you'll admit, but it's the fact that he'll leave them in visible areas like your forearms, neck, collar, and even your ankles. All spots that others will see and ask, “Wtf, you good bro??” Sometimes he'll do the same to Azul, who will do the same and ban Floyd from touching him in any form. It wouldn't be as bad if Jade didn't rub it in his face, coming up to hug you from behind, leaning in close to brush his lips against Azul's ear to whisper something, all things that Floyd can't do! It leaves Floyd incredibly annoyed, sometimes angry, and every so often devastated that he can't hold his mates. If the latter occurs, he's coming after you. A weak thing to his tears, Azul has had years to build up resilience and hold firm, but you are weak to a whiny, teary-eyed Floyd who is begging for a kiss and cuddle. It's not faaaaair, Jade's been rubbing it in his face all day, and he loves you both so much, but Azul's not budging and if he can't even hold his shrimp, he doesn't even know what he'll dooooooooo! The day ends with Floyd and you in bed, his arms tightly wrapped around your middle and legs tangled in yours as he blissfully naps. Azul's annoyed that you caved in, but Jade's amused and tries to push Azul into joining the cuddle pile with him.

Now, if Jade's the one that being iced out for something, he'll actually return the favor tenfold. He's just an innocent little guy, what do you mean he can't just secretly feed you two an aphrodisiac mushroom? You had lots of fun afterward, even Floyd agrees (he does, but his firm moral stance on mushrooms doesn't). But Azul's pissed that he was used as a test subject again, and you had to call Ace and Deuce to watch Grim as an emergency. Again. So when you both ban him to only quick smooches and side hugs, Jade returns the energy. He's refusing any form of affection, and not giving them to you. Unlike Floyd, who's begging harassing you for cuddles, he's going to make you two come beg for him. After a few days of no Jade, you're both missing him, it's surprisingly Azul who reaches out first when Jade comes to deliver some paperwork for the dorm. The octomer had leaned in to give him a kiss, when Jade stepped away with a sly smile and told him, “Oh, but I thought you weren't giving me your affections? Let's not go back on our word now, Azul.” Jade is a tad bit nicer to you—taking after Floyd—to guilt you into loving on him again. But Azul? He's gonna make him suffer, simply because he enjoys making him squirm. It's honestly a sight to see, as neither are willing to back down. At least until the two of them fall asleep in Azul's office after working a late night, curled into each other's sides on the couch.

Azul probably has it the worst, as he has both twins teasing him. Floyd and Jade are flaunting you around him, being extra handsy. They're cooing at him, whining about how they can't cuddle both of you at the same time since he was dumb enough to piss you off. How could he do this to them? Such a mean, mean Azul! By far, though, you're the weakest to Azul's charms and silver tongue when compared to the twins. Maybe it's due to the knowledge of Azul's childhood, or maybe it's just because he's extra cute, but you can't find yourself away from him for more than a day. He sniffles, murmurs something about missing your embrace, and you're rushing into his arms, kissing away his tears. The twins get incredibly annoyed that you're so quick to let Azul back into your arms, while they have to wait at least a week sometimes. But then you're both reaching out arms and cooing at them to come to bed, batting your eyes, and all complaints are out the window.

I love them they make for a wonderful polycule. After all, they're a package deal, no matter how much they might say they're not.