#AND U GET ALL EMOTIONALLY FUCKED UP OVER LITERALLY EVERYTHING

[starry-toya]

owie my uterus is bleeding wtff

i ran out of tags woah i didn't think I could do that but I could talk abt how much genuine fear goes through my being when I think of the idea of the average female biology. and then some dudes will go and complain about how terrible it is to get boners at slightly inoppurtune timings and pretend its worse than our shit like. man the hormones alr make me horny as shit I'd much rather deal w ur weird schlong crap rather than the terrifying idea of my own biology

[lunar-serpentinite]

"harry wasnt that powerful, he literally only knew 3 spells and had a horcrux in him and he wouldnt have survived without-"

listen to me, LISTEN TO ME

the boy was in survival mode for literally all of his life. almost all of his defense teachers tried to kill him. he was more worried about surviving the next voldy jumpscare. his "mentor" was raising him to die.

do u think he had the time to learn and master an arsenal of spells when everyone who was meant to help him are either dead or keeping him in the dark ? do u think he had the time to train when hes getting into life or death scenarios practically every year ?

he was a growing teen who had to deal with a murderer going after him, a world who thinks hes just off his rockers, adults who rarely take him seriously, the natural hormonal teen years, and the typical fights between friends who have vastly different life experiences but arent emotionally mature enough to address those yet . i dont think he even had that much positive reinforcement from everyone around him

stop calling harry james potter a weakass fuckass just because he doesnt have a shiny arsenal of weapons and the mind of a master strategist . thats literally a child and then a teen who keeps on getting retraumatised over and over and over, and you keep on taking the piss on him because he doesnt react like a levelheaded YA protagonist who has everything under control ?

hes just a dude who had to practically raise himself, who tries his goddamn best but fucks up constantly and is always haunted by his fuckups, and who still manages to get the job done at the end

AND EVEN AFTER THAT the people still put more responsibilities on his shoulders like "he couldve redid society with his influence" "he couldve done this he couldve done that" "he couldve done more"

how much more of himself does he have to give before society is satisfied ? why cant the adults take charge for once and rebuild the system that THEY broke ? why's it all on harry's shoulders ALONE ?

"he couldve used his influence-" did u conveniently forget how the wizarding world showed him over and over how easily their views and treatment of him cld change at the flip of a coin ? do u think he'd trust them to listen to him after all this time ? NO

like i get it, "chosen ones" have the influence and the responsibility . "chosen ones" should be powerful and their skills and abilities varied by the end of the series . they could do more and many chosen ones have done more . but harry's just part of the subset of chosen ones that is just tired and beat down at the end of the it all .

idk give him a break, hop off his back, let him retire to the countryside

[nereidprinc3ss]

okay i know this is kind of a specific request but can you do something with professor Spence and uni reader where they get into a spat and argue bc she did something stupid and he gets mad and she’s like “noooo pls don’t be mad i hate when you’re mad at me I’m sorry🥺” bc she literally cannot function knowing she let him down (me with everybody) but he’s like super stubborn and goes all closed up and quiet so that he doesn’t like blow up on her until she finally says like “pls talk to me” and he’s all pissed and like “hell na bitch u crazy!🗣️‼️” but then later he’s like “it’s ok i love u but neva do that shit again ho” then they make up and it’s good again 🎀 ok i explained that so poorly (and comedically if i may) but i hope u get it and pls make it SO DRAMATIC bc I live for drama! like she steals test answers or something or does something that could like get her kicked out of school OR him lose his job 🤔 sigh … idk I’m leaving now. Also i LOOPOOOCE ORRKGOOVI love your fics. Luv em

hey girl (gender neutral) this made me laugh bc genuinely sometimes i write spencer so ooc that is what he sounds like. and i'm not sorry! anyway this is potentially a vyvanse fueled nightmare but i wrote it and i'm posting it MY BLOG MY RULES BITCHESSSS!!!! but genuinely read the content warning LMAO this one got a lil kick to it

warnings/tags: ANGST, HURT/COMFORT, fem!reader, spencer and r get into a for real argument like they're mean to each other, spencer is a lil toxic but its resolved, emotionally neglects reader just for a teeensy second but then he's really nice and sweet again, discussion of his past addic+ion, gets fluffy because i'm not EVIL, gets suggestive at the end bc i am secretly evil.......

a/n: i don't know whats happening. this confuses me just as much as it confuses you. its 3 am in the morning. im gonna post nice happy things soon. Gootbye

“I cannot believe you right now. I don’t even—I don’t even know what to say.” 

“Spencer, you don’t have to say anything. It has nothing to do with you, and I’m not looking for your approval.” 

He looks up from where he’d been rubbing his temples, like you’re a headache, eyebrows raised and lips parted in indignant disbelief. 

“Oh! You’re not looking for my approval? Well thank god for that, because if you were one of my students I would recommend expulsion to the board.” 

“Are you fucking kidding me? I just said I don’t care about your opinion on this, much less your hypothetical opinion from some alternate universe where you have any authority over my education whatsoever.” 

“You distributed an answer key to half of your class! Objectively this is the kind of thing that gets people expelled. I don’t understand how someone so smart could do something so fucking stupid.” 

The words bite more than you were prepared for—but what hurts even more is how much he seems to mean them. In arguments past you’d both said things you didn’t mean, and then would immediately melt into I’m so sorry’s and the fight would resolve itself. Spencer’s clenched jaw and inability to make eye contact with you do not lend themselves to tender apologies. They cannot be attributed to miscommunication. 

You take a step closer to where he’s bracing himself against the countertop, arms crossed defensively in front of your chest. 

“Spencer, I’m sorry. I didn’t think it was such a big deal. People cheat in college all the time.” 

Still no reply. His head shakes so minutely you wonder if you’re imagining it. Panic wells in your chest. 

“Please talk to me. I really hate when you ice me out. I’m sorry, okay? Just... please say something.” 

Finally, his eyes slide to you. They lack the fiery anger of moments ago but there’s not much softness there either. His normally warm gaze now feels too abrasive, too cold and sharp on your bare skin. You're exposed, much too soft for that grating look, and it feels like he can see everything that’s wrong with you. 

“Believe me when I tell you this. I am doing us both a favor by not speaking to you right now.” 

And then he’s leaving the kitchen—nothing but a breeze against your cheek and the sound of a door slamming to prove he was ever there. 

The apartment is silent. You stand in the middle of the kitchen, unsure of what to do next. Spencer very, very rarely gets angry at you to the point of neglect, and you know he’s doing his best with what was modelled for him as a child and his tendency to feel things so deeply it’s nearly disabling; but that doesn’t make it hurt much less. It doesn’t make you feel less abandoned or alone.  

You’re sad, and you’re still pissed, and maybe you’re in just a bit of shock as you robotically move back to your nest of blankets on the couch and resume your schoolwork. What else is there to do? Unless Spencer is right—unless you really are about to get expelled after getting the answer key for an upcoming test from a friend, who then gave it to another friend, and so on. But is that really your fault?  

It’s a struggle to stay focused as your mind keeps drifting back to Spencer in the other room, those cruel words and that cold steely look in his eye that isn’t supposed to ever be aimed at you. It’s not a secret that side of him exists, but it doesn’t belong in this apartment. It’s not something he needs to use against you. He’s supposed to be on your side. But instead, he’d said you should be expelled and essentially called you stupid. And now you’re doing homework for a class at a school you may not even be a student of come Monday. 

---------------------------------------------------

The sound of the office door opening forty-five minutes later spikes your blood pressure and simultaneously makes your heart flutter, because no matter how mad at him you might be, Spencer is still Spencer.  

He comes to stand behind the couch quietly, but you don’t acknowledge him. Maybe your typing gets a bit more aggressive, but aside from that you flat out reject his presence. 

“Can we talk?” 

You let him sweat for a minute as you finish your paragraph. 

“I don’t know, Spencer. Can we? Or are you not done with your temper tantrum?” 

“That is... well deserved,” he sighs, rounding the couch and tapping the bottom of your foot, signaling that he wants you to move your legs. You despise how automatically you comply, pulling your knees to your chest to avoid touching him as he sits next to you. There’s a long moment of silence, in which you resume typing. Spencer scoffs, leaning in slightly to peer at your screen. “Are you doing homework right now? I’m a complete asshole to you and you just... do your homework?"

“What the fuck else was I supposed to do?” you almost-yell, slamming your laptop shut and blinking away potential tears. “The only person I wanted to talk to called me stupid and fucking left!” 

The tears realize their potential once you admit the blunt truth. 

Spencer carefully moves your laptop and pulls you into his arms—and you just let him. There’s not much fight left in you. There wasn’t a lot to begin with. 

“I am so sorry, angel. You’re right, I shouldn’t have done that. I shouldn’t have yelled, I shouldn’t have said what I said, I shouldn’t have walked away. I overreacted.” 

“Yeah, you really did,” you cry, allowing him to run his hand over your hair. “Why did you do that? Why were you so fucking mean?” 

His voice shakes slightly as he responds, betraying his own anxieties, and a new, unwelcome sense of trepidation slithers through your veins. 

“I was wondering that, too. Even as I was saying it, I knew—I knew it wasn’t what I wanted to be saying. And then I was in the other room and I wanted to be out here, and I couldn’t figure out why I wasn’t. But I think I was just scared. Which—I know, doesn’t really make sense, but... I think about when Ethan dropped out of the academy, and ended up doing heroin in New Orleans for three years, and I think about when I almost left the BAU because I was so convinced I’d never get clean that I didn’t even want to anymore, and—and the idea of you losing your education and your direction like that terrified me, probably unreasonably, and I took it out on you. And I’m sorry.” 

“But I’m not like you or Ethan. You don’t have to worry about that. Even if I... even I do get in some sort of disciplinary trouble. That’s a road you don’t have to worry about me going down, ever.” 

He fixes some unseen wrinkle on your shirt.  

“Yeah, but, remember... I used to not be like me or Ethan either. Do you think twelve-year-old Spencer would have ever even considered that of the infinite realities and universes which exist, he was living in one where someday he’d be shooting up in the bathroom at work?” 

“Mm-mm,” you hum, shaking your head and burying your face in Spencer’s shoulder. The sound is more of a plea for him to be less descriptive than an answer to his rhetorical question. It’s still much easier for him to talk about that part of his life than it is for you to have to actually imagine it. You didn’t know him then, but you’ve seen pictures, and you know Spencer now, and it’s... it’s just too much. Too sad. 

“Okay,” he agrees soothingly, still playing with your hair. “I digress. My point is that literally anything is possible, and while it’s not necessarily likely, I more than anyone know that anxiety even over the most improbable of things is never completely unfounded.”  

You sniffle in response, too emotionally and physically exhausted to contribute much to the conversation by this point. Thankfully, Spencer can talk for two. An idiosyncrasy which you love and comes in handy every once in a while. He can play his own devil’s advocate; in this case, you. 

“But that doesn’t mean I get to take it out on you. Ever. I truly, truly, sincerely apologize for that. I never want to hurt you.” 

You let the apology sink into your skin like a salve, soothing every abrasion those earlier words had left in their violent wake. 

After a few minutes, you find the energy to ask a question that might best remain unanswered. 

“Are you still mad at me?” 

He’s quiet for a beat, seemingly contemplative as his fingers trace abstract patterns in a language all his own on your arm. 

“I’m not thrilled. But you were right earlier. It’s not my place to be mad at you for something like that.” 

“Mm... it’s a little bit your place. You’re an actual professor.” 

He chuckles. 

“At an entirely different university.” 

“Thank god,” you laugh. “You and me at the same school would be such an HR clusterfuck.”

While it’s almost a serious matter, the smile in his voice is evident. 

“Yeah... I, uh... try not to think about it.” 

“Okay, but seriously. In your professional opinion. Am I fucked? Like, do I need to prepare an appeal and character witnesses or whatever?” 

Spencer sighs. 

“It was incredibly reckless and irresponsible. You should be ready for disciplinary pushback from the schoolboard if you get caught. That being said... because over sixty of you got a hold of the answer key, I doubt anyone is getting expelled, and even if they did, it would likely only be the TA and the student he gave the key to. It’s my tentative, professional opinion that you’ll probably be fine.” 

You relax slightly, allowing a tension you didn’t realize was there to shed like an old skin. 

“I’m not gonna cheat again,” you promise on an exhale. It’s simply too much risk for too little reward.

Spencer’s response is quiet, and comes much faster than you’d expected. 

“Oh, I know you aren’t. Because if you do, you’re going to have to worry about disciplinary action from me. And I’m not nearly as nice as the dean of your school, darling girl.” 

But something about the way he says it—a thinly veiled threat/promise contrasted by a sweet kiss to your forehead—doesn’t exactly make academic honesty look all that exciting.

[w0rmm1lk]

May I request the class 1A boys (if u write for multiple in the same fic) reacting to their gn! S/o (who’s normally insanely calm and patient) finally snapping and ends up nearly killing a villain? Like reader snaps during a fight against a villain or smth because the boys (seperate but yk) got hurt and stuff? Sorry if this doesn’t make much sense, I suck at explaining things 😭

hi! i didnt end up doing all the boys but I did the ones I think I would b able to write for best hehe, for future posts probably gonna limit it to 5 characters per post!

characters: Tenya Iida, Denki Kaminari, Eijiro Kirishima, Mezou Shoji, Shoto Todoroki, Katsuki Bakugo, Izuku Midoriya.

reader: Gn

summary: the very well known 1a student (reader) who is known for being calm and understanding almost fucking kills someone.

warnings: blood mentions, near death experience, swearing, injuries.

other details: 1A!reader, reader quirk not mentioned but they use their bare fists to beat the shit out of the villain, villain is not any specific one.

👓Tenya Iida👓

👓- Iida was fast but damn the villain was faster.

👓- this resulted into iida now basically completely motionless on the ground yet still concious.

👓- usually if it was any of your other friends you would just take a deep breath and anylis whats going on to make sure things are delt with properly.

👓- but that iis not the case this time.

👓- it was almost like something snapped.

👓- nobody could actually figure out how you managed to catch the villain, especially with their speed.

👓- but bystanders were more focused on the fact that you were now repeatedly slamming their face into the sidewalk.

👓- honestly a miracle the villain survives that shit, but they 100% had brain damage afterwards.

👓- normally iida would step in but he could only really stare at you.

👓- partly due to the shoock, but also the fact that he straight up couldn't move from his injuries.

👓- after everything calmed down and iida recovered he gave your ass a huge lecture.

⚡Denki Kaminari⚡

⚡- he was shocked.

⚡- pun intended but also he was just straight up in shock.

⚡- first off, surprising he got these many injuries without short circuting.

⚡- guess his training rlly payed off.

⚡- well at least his quirk training.

⚡- thinks its sick as hell how you just beat the shit out of the villain.

⚡- their face will never be the same again.

⚡- hes kinda into it tbh.

🪨Eijiro Kirishima🪨

🪨- literally just makes the :o face

🪨- this man got one hit that actuqally injured him at you just cut loose.

🪨- he felt like not even he could do that much damage in unbreakable. (he totally could do worse but hes just having a moment leave me alone.)

🪨- aftwards will literally beg you to spar with him.

🪨- unfortunatley never gets to fight you while ur that pissed off.

🪨- honestly when he saw how beat up the villain was he thought that it was bakugos doing for a hot second.

🐙Mezou Shoji🐙

🐙- the way you reacted to him getting hurt lowkey reminded him of dark shadow during the training camp.

🐙- very similar situation tbh.

🐙- it was just one of his extended limbs that got injured, yet you reacted as if he had just been decapitated.

🐙- froze up for a second when he watched you just immediately run up to the villain you have been fighting for at least an hour and just absolutely demolish then within a few minutes.

🐙- had to restrain you a bit to stop you from actually murdering them.

🐙- was a little shocked at the sudden swap oof personality for that short time but was more focused on stopping you from being charged with murder.

❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥

❄️🔥- ^that face.

❄️🔥- like that is just his reaction tbh.

❄️🔥- i mean its not everyday you see the person thats just a slightly more emotionally available version of you almost kill someone.

❄️🔥- especially over a small cut.

❄️🔥- the cut wasnt even caused directly by the villain, it was a broken piece of glass that was flying around with other debri./

❄️🔥- i mean-- at least you caught the villain?

❄️🔥- and almost killed them.

❄️🔥- along with free medical debt.

❄️🔥- or no medical debt?

❄️🔥- idk how that stuff works in japan bruh.

💥Katsuki Bakugo💥

💥- fight me all you want but

💥- he just straight up finds it hot.

💥- like if you look close enough this mf is blushing.

💥- who knew that the one time someone makes bakugo blush is his partner attempting murder.

💥- originally wasnt going to hold you back.

💥- the longer he watched you beat the shit out of this guy he started to genuinley think you were going to kill them.

💥- once everything settles down you started back to you normal calm persona.

💥- bro was just like ????

🥦Izuku Midoryia🥦

🥦- panic.

🥦- like you dont even have to look at him, you just need to be near him and you can basically feel how panicked he is over this.

🥦- lots of panicked words, you can barely even tell whats he's saying through the rage but also the pure speed he's speaking at.

🥦- few words that were mostly intelligable you could tell he was saying you should stop.

🥦- even if you wanted to stop your body wouldnt let you.

🥦- ended up needing to use blackwhip to get you off.

🥦- not that it did much being the villai already had a broken nose and multiple broken ribs.

🥦- probably missing teeth aswell.

🥦- izuku is lowkey terrified to somehow piss you off now.

theyre all a little short but i think I slayed

[kraviolis]

i told y’all. i told y’all i was gonna go crazy over this post made by @gummy-goat-galaxy​

full disclosure i drew literally all of this before looking into the details of the AU so this is 70% my interpretation of his original post but i need to explain my thought process so. here’s the post explaining the details of the actual AU!!! and below is what my brain made up on the spot

ok so belos finds tiny child luz and is like “fuck everyone. this is mine now” and treats her like a goddamn princess. to him, she is a Gift From God to remind him to stay on his Righteous Path. an innocent little girl who is just so bubbly and always tries to see the good in everything, including him. she is a reminder of how Pure and Good humanity is, and seeing as though she’s the literal only human he’s had any contact with besides caleb in 400 fucking years, he is never letting the demon realm corrupt her like it did to him.

she’s basically his Lamb and he the Shepherd, and because he’s so desperate to keep her “““pure”““ he strictly keeps her within the castle and even then not all of the castle is available to her. he keeps her contact with witches to an absolute bare minimum.

he entrusts her protection specifically to hunter, despite the fact he’s only 2 years older. his reasoning is “caleb did a pretty good job raising me so this’ll be fine probably.” when belos himself cannot keep an eye on her, it’s hunter’s job. luz and hunter end up being raised in a sorta similar situation to catra & adora from she-ra but they are actually siblings and not just best friends.

(if u havent seen she-ra, basically its their abusive caretaker creating a golden child + scapegoat dynamic, where one kid can do absolutely no wrong (which doesnt mean they cant still be abused/manipulated!!) while the other kid is blamed for literally everything that goes wrong. the caretaker also regularly pits them against each other to encourage competition & keep the all power in the caretaker’s hands.)

similar to catra & adora, the whole competition thing doesnt really work. luz is just too damn kind and too damn good for hunter to ever resent her, and she’s all he really has. because hunter is the scapegoat, he grows wise to belos’s manipulations WAY sooner. it’s easier to figure out when you’re being mistreated when you literally watch ur guardian treating ur sibling so much better than how they treat u.

unfortunately, because luz cannot help but see the good in absolutely everyone and can be empathetic to a fault, she doesnt realize belos’s game until she ends up sneaking out of the castle. she actually really loves belos and is thankful for him taking her in for a long time. she calls him uncle like hunter, despite belos nudging her towards seeing him as a father bcus he sees her as a pseudo-daughter. (but luz remembers her dad, and has no desire to replace him with someone else no matter how much she cares for belos)

belos does love & adore luz, he would do almost anything to keep her happy and “innocent” and “pure”, but not to the extent that he could still end up redeemed. he still manipulates & subtly emotionally abuses her to keep her in line, but it’s only when she sneaks out and meets eda the owl lady does she start getting clued into this. and once luz learns what belos has done to hunter it’s all fucking over.

hunter loves luz. she is his sister and always will be. but while he’s stuck to belos because of his duties as golden guard, she sees how green the grass is on the other side and doesn’t even hesitate to hop over there. watching her slowly grow more and more distant while she keeps sneaking out to visit with her new friends (eda, king, willow, gus, amity, etc.) is one of the most painful things hunter has had to deal with.

he feels betrayed at first, as if luz is replacing him with other people who arent broken like he is, and when luz actually leaves for good- belos lies to the public and says she was kidnapped- hunter is the one who leads the hunt to find her and bring her back home safely. when they confront each other, luz tries to do her whole dramatic speech about how wrong belos is and how he’s been lying their whole lives, but hunter already knows. the only reason he stayed was for luz, but she couldnt even stay from him? it fuckin hurts man.

they end up on opposite sides for a minute. hunter gains no satisfaction from trying to ruin this new life she’s found for herself but goddamnit, he has a job to do. he cant just defect. and then he defects after watching belos try to kill luz because she’s let herself become corrupted by the witches.

thats about all my brain got for this so far. TL;DR basically just listen to the “first time in forever” and “mother knows best reprise” and “broken crown” by mumford & sons and thats pretty much the gist of it.

[chuplayswithfire]

I have more thoughts on how and why the sex was a mistake. I will be thinking about this all week. All year.

Let's start with: the sex was consensual, they both wanted it, and that does not change that it was the wrong decision for their relationship in that moment. They should not have had sex! Ed is 100% correct and he is not running away when he says that! He is not just avoiding his feelings or getting cold feet, he is genuinely correct, and here's why:

They continue to be on different pages. They have not had a chance to talk it through. It's been like 2-3 max since Ed woke up from the Gravy Basket, and emotions are still running high. Even ignoring that they were just tortured in front of each other and that Stede killed a man right after Ed asked him not to, they were not in the same space emotionally regarding their relationship.

Fir one thing: Stede did *not* get his heartbroken (prior to this). He got his romantic affirmation. Season 1 was an entire arc leading to Stede realizing he is gay, that he is in love, that he is loved in return. For him, for HIM, sex is a natural next step, and we already knew he wanted it from how he deepened their kiss in episode 5. Their relationship itself is not a source of trauma for Stede; he loves Ed and he walked away from his old life to be with him, and now he found him again, and they've agreed to do it together, figure things out, his romantic hopes are realized.

And in that moment, adding to that background informations, is that Stede also wanted to avoid all his messy feelings by being physical. He was tortured and he watched Ed and his crew be tortured, he was insulted and had to listen to Ed be insulted, and he wanted to regain control and power by killing Ned Low, and removing the threat. That's where Stede's head is.

Ed, on the other hand, did get his heart broken and while the majority of what he's working through is about his self-hatred, his dissatisfaction with his career, and his desire to find a life that feels worth living, he is also dealing with a significant amount of trust issues with his relationship with Stede, because Stede left him. He has heard from Stede that he loves him, but Ed's deepest fear is that he's unlovable, and he hasn't gotten over that, or his hurt from how things went, in the like two days it's been.

But he loves Stede, and he's attracted to him, and he wants him, so when Stede initiates and manhandles him a bit and things get hot and heavy, he consents. He's all in, carried away by the moment.

And he regrets it.

He especially wasn't ready because Ed is a planner. I know we were all joking about how they definitely weren't going to take it slow and they were going to rush through, but I do genuinely think he meant it. Ed's natural state is as a planner and tactician, everything has an angle for him and even when he wants to just be simple, he always has a bajillion factors in mind that he's juggling, so we can be sure that Ed probably did very much have thoughts about how he wanted their first time to go, and what he wanted them to do and grow into as a relationship before they had sex, and instead they got tortured, Stede killed a man, and then they fucked in the aftermath.

Not bloody optimal indeed.

Now back to Stede: he is utterly unprepared for the idea that the sex could be a mistake because to and for him it was the natural next step in their relationship. This is his romantic fantasy is the thing; he was a cool brave pirate captain who made an enemy walk the plank in defense of his crew and his boyfriend, and then Ed came to him and Stede got to sweep him off his feet and shove him against the wall, kiss him, bring him to the bed, and pointedly shut the curtains on an audience that doesn't exist, followed by a lazy morning after with breakfast in bed.

So it probably hurts extra that Ed is like that was a mistake. This is literally him living his fantasy from episode 1, Ned Low even has facial hair and is mean to him like Izzy used to be. He could ignore all the realities of that situation, because he was living his fantasy, and Ed dragged them both out of fantasyland, back to the real world, where their relationship isn't fixed 100% and sex didn't change that.

They weren't on the same page. They still aren't, because they need to talk.

[its-time-to-write]

kicking myself to keep from crying

Once again, huge shoutout to @whimsical-roasting! This is pt. 2 to your mind is not your friend and although it kind of works as a standalone, maybe read that first. Like before, I def used entire chunks of our conversation😅 so really this is her fic. I just filled in some of the gaps. Love u bae!

kicking myself to keep from crying

You wake up feeling weird. There’s soft light streaming through the windows, and something warm half on top of you. You blink away the sleep from your eyes, and realize it’s Jamie. He’s on his stomach, with one arm thrown around your waist and a leg hooked around you. You don’t want to disturb him but you’re a little uncomfortable, so you carefully roll onto your left side. You now have a clear view of his face, features softened by sleep, and you’ve somehow managed to keep your legs intertwined. 

Reaching out with your free hand, you trace a line from his eyebrows down his nose, to his jaw, then his lips. You can’t help yourself, because when will you get the chance to wake up in Jamie Tartt’s bed again? His chest is rising in a steady, comforting beat.

He likes me, you think with a sigh, and the thought is enough to dispel most of the weirdness from the night before.

How did you go from crying over a bad hookup to sleeping in Jamie’s bed? God, you still feel so tired and drained, but not as much as last night. You don’t ever want to get up.

Your hand is resting on Jamie’s neck, and you can feel his heartbeat pulsing; you resist the urge to kiss him but fail, lips on his neck.

Last night was fucking awful, you think. You’re feeling like a car with an empty tank, pushing yourself up the hill to get to Jamie’s house. All you can think about is how physically and emotionally drained you’re still feeling, when you feel Jamie’s breathing change.

He blinks once, twice, then smiles at you.

“Morning, love,” he says, and you feel his rough morning voice doing something to you.

“Afternoon, more like,” you reply in a whisper.

Jamie just smiles, and you return it with a small one. He stretches all his limbs as best he can, unwilling to move his arm from around you. “You sleep ok?” he asks.

You nod.

“You feeling better?

You nod again.

He frowns. “Are you… do you not wanna talk?”

You give a small shrug and sigh. It is not easy to shrug while laying on your side, so you roll onto your back.

“I’m sorry,” you say, unwilling to meet his eyes. “I just… my headspace is going to be kinda fucked for a bit, but I feel better.”

Jamie just nods and pulls you closer (if that’s even possible). He has an unfamiliar ache, one that makes him want to protect you and take away any bad feelings you still have.

You do enjoy the feeling of his body around yours, but of course, it can’t last. You shift out of his grasp and sit up. You notice that you’re still in his hoodie and sweatpants.

For some reason, the realization makes you want to cry.

“Oh, Jamie,” you say, still unable to look at him, “thank you. For, like, everything… especially last night.”

Jamie’s propped up on his elbows now, and looking at you intently. 

“Um, I can be out of your hair,” you continue, staring at your hands in your lap. They look like strangers hands. “I bet you had plans for today.”

Jamie’s frowning again now, and you decide you hate yourself for being the cause.

“What d’you mean?” he asks, and you’re unsure what he means.

You laugh nervously. “What?”

“What are you on about, why would you fucking leave?”

He looks so confused and indignant, but you don’t understand why.

You laugh again. Damn your nerves. “What else would I do? Stay?” The thought seems utterly ridiculous, and all too much like heaven

Jamie’s sitting up now, rolling over in a flurry of sheets to imitate your position. Your heart rate climbs at the feel of his arm pressed against yours. 

Pull yourself together, you scold. Why is a simple touch scrambling your brain when last night’s literal sex felt like you’d had a bucket of ice water dumped on you?

You suppose it has something to do with the person.

“Love,” he says with the urgency usually reserved for someone telling you the building’s on fire, “what would you like me to do? Just tell me, and I’ll fucking do it.”

His raw emotion is throwing you off. You’re not sure how to respond, but your mouth is opening apart from your free will and saying, “I want to stay,” so you catch yourself and follow it up with a hasty, “but only if you want me to! Not out of pity or anything, because I’m ok, truly.”

You think that if you say it out loud (fine, it was a mumble), it will be true. You’re not ok, still thinking about that goddamn pity fuck, and you’re not a pity fuck, and there’s absolutely no way you’re going through those emotions again. Especially not with Jamie.

Jamie, who is closing his eyes, and letting out a deep, annoyed sigh with his jaw clenched.

A flash of fear jolts through your body, as well as the ever-present, ever-painful déjà vu. Jamie’s mad at you, and you start to get up to go.

You’re stopped by his hand on yours.

You look back to see Jamie rub his free hand over his face and mumble, “Oughta kill that prick,” before fully taking in your expression. His entire face softens, and he squeezes your hand once.

You can still feel anxiety coursing through your veins, which Jamie can see in your face. He changes his grip on your hand, and he lifts it to his lips to press a kiss on your inner wrist.

Your brain short-circuits at the pure intimacy of that gesture, something you have never experience and were pretty sure just existed in books and movies, not reality. Certainly not your reality. 

Briefly, you wonder how Jamie got like this. 

You remember hearing stories about how he had been a prick himself, and had tried to reconcile that with the person you knew today. 

You’d seen a bit of it on the pitch during matches, when his eyes would glint and he’d stick his tongue out, right before doing something completely insane and gravity-defying that would cause the entire stadium to erupt in joy.

You knew Roy Kent called him the “prince prick of all pricks,” and that Jamie had definitely deserved that nickname once upon a time.

Still, it’s difficult to imagine that it’s the same Jamie who is sitting in bed with you, eyes looking at you so softly you think you might cry. Again. 

He says, “Love, I meant every word I said last night,” and you can tell he’s trying to make his entire face show how much he means it.

Tears begin to well up in your eyes. “Goddamnit, Jamie,” you whisper, “This is the most I’ve cried in fucking forever. What the fuck?”

Jamie just smiles and wipes away a stray tear with his thumb.

Everything he’s doing is so intentional, with no malice and no ulterior motives. You’ve loved him for ages, so this just feels… it feels like it’s too much. You’re feeling the swirls of good and bad emotions and you don’t know how to sort them, so you just hold his face and fucking breathe because yes you’re crying, but it’s not really out of sadness now, is it?

You say, “About what you said last night…” to which his face drops in anticipation of rejection.

“I really fucking like you too,” you say. “I have for too long and I thought I should’ve gotten over it, hence the shit with that guy, but every time I’d drive home I’d just think about how the way your face lights up when we see each other felt more fucking meaningful than anything that he would do to me. He barely even acknowledged my existence, but you…” you trail off. “You made me feel like the entire sky shone just for me.”

You see Jamie try to school his expression, but he can’t control the wide grin breaking across his face. He puffs out a sigh of relief, or maybe it’s one of the distaste he feels every time you mention that prick. Maybe distaste isn’t the right word. What’s a good word for when you both want to puke and kick the shit out of someone?

Jamie doesn’t dwell on it too long because that shitbag is nowhere near now, you’re right in front of him with those absolutely kissable lips and wearing his clothes with his name on them, and maybe you’d both be alright to stay in bed all day. After all, you still look tired and he thinks maybe you’d sleep better if you were the big spoon this time.

[dearestxiao]

Dear Santa,

I would like some more fucked up/possessive/shockingly sweet Venti HC 🙏

Thank you

warnings: possessive venti, gaslighting and manipulation, abuse of power(?), threats(?), scars from battle, let me know if I'm missing anything!!

ooh my god this took me so long to get out we're almost a week into the new years 😭😭😭. but when I saw this ask I actually screamed thank u sm nonnie. being able to ramble nonsense abt ven is always so fun. these aren't a lot whatsoever but these are some main things I think about with venti. all are random but somewhat related?

he often does performances, whether that be at a tavern/bar or an open mic that are either 'dedicated' to you or a 'special somebody'. even if he doesn't directly say your name, he makes it so obvious that it's about you, his eyes glued onto you the entirety of his show. it's supposed to be a sweet gesture, and it would be, if it wasn't so clearly a way for him to claim you as his, which is only worsened by the fact that you're not. no one would ever believe otherwise though.

in the same vain, if you start romantically seeing someone, or even slightly have interest in anyone, he instantly becomes intensely clingy. you two have barely hung out recently, you two should hang out more! he's been dying to see this live show with you, and there's a new cafe that just opened up, and there's this beautiful meadow nearby that's perfect for a picnic, he pulls out all the works to try to convince you to spend more time with him than anybody else. and trust, if you do spend time with someone else, you'll never hear the end of it. he'll constantly sulk or make you feel insanely guilty, saying anything and everything to make you feel awful.

I think the main thing that would differentiate canon!venti and modern au!venti are their literal powers. given that modern!venti doesn't have a borderline fear-tactic to hold over your head, he instead resorts to manipulating you, especially in ways similar to the headcanon above.

venti is insanely emotionally intelligent. he knows every little thing about you, how your mind ticks and what really pulls at your heart strings. he can't help but use this to his favor. anytime an 'issue' arises between you too, he's quick to put on an award-winning act. of course, if it was what'd he call a genuine problem or a mistake on his behalf, he's quick to apologize and do everything in his power to make amends. but if you're upset about something akin to his clinginess and possessiveness... oh baby, you're getting guilt-tripped.

it doesn't really matter if you're a person who's hard to manipulate or not. venti can break a will. at some point you just wear down and give up.

canon!venti really doesn't like to hold his powers against you (he really loves the thought of you choosing to be with him, even if that choice is... coerced), but if push comes to shove, he does. he would never would never actually use them, but stories about how he acted and what he did back during those days of war are certainly enough to keep you docile. to be fair, he doesn't necessarily need to use them at all. you're far less likely to go against him if you know just what he's capable of. deep down he knows he'd never do anything, but he's so unpredictable that the fear that he could is enough.

I think venti would also definitely use the fact that he's the god of freedom against you, especially as a sort of mind trick. he states that he's the god of freedom, he would never take away your freewill, that goes against everything he stands for! so, the fact that you're with him is clearly your own choice, something of your own doing, and if you truly wanted to, you could've left him at any time you wanted to!

somewhat similarly, I think venti would have a 'thing' for getting you to say certain things. he'll do things like pin you down and say (with a big, toothy smile plastered on his face) that he won't let you out until you admit that you love him, admit that you're his and all his, admit that you would never, ever leave him. he tells you to do it in a lighthearted manner through giggles and grins, but you know that he's serious about never letting you out from underneath his grasp.

also, another few headcanons that doesn't really fit into anything else:

I think another difference between modern au!venti and canon!venti is that modern au!venti is a lot more of a creep. as the god of freedom, canon!venti would, of course, stick to atleast some of his morals and godly obligations. being a yandere doesn't entirely diminish his values, even if he does stretch the limitations of them often. but modern venti is not tied to those morals, so he has no reason to really obide by them. he therefore sees no issue with doing things like going through your room or your items, looking through any notes or journals or diaries you have, laying on your bed or pocketing an item of yours or two.

despite gods likely having insane regenerative powers, I can see venti choosing to keep any and all scars that would've developed throughout his life of serving out duties as a god. they're all so especially jarring because of just how gentle and harmless venti looks in comparison. it serves both as a reminder of his past and all he's been through (something that you would definitely atleast sympathize with) and all he's done, a testament as to how looks can be deceiving and that you should certainly never underestimate him.

[daemon-in-my-head]

Okay, my actual unpopular opinion. Cw for abuse/amnesia/head injury. I'm feeling in a venty mood today.

I think Larian did a piss poor job with Durge. There are some incredibly heavy and dark themes in the Durge Storyline but they're used for fucking comedic relief or not really touched upon whatsoever. Their interpretation of it is 'oh lol edgy go piss yourself or smth' while completely disregarding most of the time how fucked up that story is.

In general, I severely dislike the way they handle Amnesia or head injury. The characters just accept that they know jack shit, and there's 0 way it influences them like the fuck? The fear of forgetting is a real one, and a lot of people dread that. Even more people who have lost some memories for whatever reason would like to have them back or feel grief and loss over it, but here it's literally just a cute lil character quirk despite multiple people having that? Also, a fucking Lobotomy that's touched upon maybe twice despite Durge having severe fucking brain damage, apparently still suffers dizzy spells and forgets near everything they learn again? Seriously?

Also, the whole Orin and Gortash bit. It's pretty plain obvious these people were severely abused as children and the game makes no effort to hide it, but it also lets you express 0 pity or empathy and, at best, enables you to encourage their fucking abusers? Are you shitting me? The sole fact that you gain an advantage over Orin if you straight-up torture her emotionally is so fucked up and not in a good way. You literally only have the option of disregarding her, taunting her or telling her 'yo gg you were never loved and only viewed as a tool by everyone around you'. I get they're villains, but making fun of abuse is in no way cool, to say the least, and the game in previous acts had a very clear stance that not everything is black and white, so why is it suddenly fine to portray people in that exact way? "Everyone deserves a chance except for these guys in particular."

I love all these characters and the game in general, in fact I pretty exclusively play Durge (just not how they intended), but I have very passionate feelings about how they and their stories are being (mis-)treated so blatantly. Yeah, sure, not everyone can have the same amount of content or care as Astarion, but giving you the option to learn about how fucked up their life was and then only say, 'oh lol u deserved far worse actually' is incredibly fucking poor taste. And forgetting massive parts of your life is not just a cute little quirk or plot device but a very real response to physical and psychological trauma. Which they imply it is in these cases too but we're just gonna brush that off.

[kroosluvr]

Ive been wondering lately, how would have P5 played out if Kasumi had failed to save Sumire. For all the times Sumi says or feels that Kasumi would be able to still succeed at Gymnastics and life through the pain, and wouldnt need as much help as she need...i feel like Kasumi would have been fucking destroyed emotionally.

Would she have really been able to move on more quicly like Sumire felt? Would she end up asking a similar wish as Sumire if she went to Maruki's counseling? Would she become friends with Joker and the Thieves like Sumi did?

You have such a deep understanting of Sumi, im curious to hear your thoughts on the other Yoshizawa

OMFGGG this is such a good concept.... i havent tried to get into kasumi's head that much but off the top of my head:

(under the cut bc its a bit long)

kasumi's love for gymnastics, surface-level, seems to run much deeper than sumire's love for it. i interpret sumire's love for gymnastics as more like "its because i did it with my sister that i really enjoyed/loved it" so since that was the main factor, when kasumi died, sumire drifted away from the sport (also due to traumatic factors but like yeah)

so i think, opposite to sumire, she would throw herself TENFOLD into the sport, and be more grating to herself if she failed: kind of pinning her entire identity on the sport (the way sumire did prior to her death) and basically she invests all of her time into gymnastics, because of the guilt and distress and sadness she feels, maybe if she's at the top-of-the-top, she can figure it out more.

SO LIKE she didn't move on any better than sumire did but she deals with it in an opposite way (in my headcanon)

thinking about it.. i don't think kasumi would wish to become sumire, but maybe she'd allude to something (i.e. i'm trying to become the best gymnast in the world but this guilt and sadness is holding me back) that maruki would take as "oh maybe if u forgot about sumire u'd be better off"

so that's something that's Just As horrific and jarring as literally becoming your dead sister, and it'd lead to like interesting moments like (interview) "so kasumi how are you coping with the loss of your sister" "ah, if you're talking about the loss of my latest competition, i just had a few mistakes with thsi apparatus but i'll be back in tip-top shape for the next one!" optimistic to a fault.. she glazes over anything that doesn't fit Her Reality.... everything goes back to her gymnastics

and i think, because of maruki's "intervention", it works! kasumi suddenly does rocket up to the top in gymnastics! that's something that's absolutely terrifying to kasumi when the delusion breaks: was i really willing to give up the beloved memories of my sister just to get an edge in gymnastics? would i really give it all up? did i really think i'd be better off without her?

it'd def be interesting if she befriended the thieves!!! i think her boisterous sort of personality and her intense, almost overwhelming dedication to her sport...... that confidant w akira seems interesting..... i think, at least, her sudden "switch" in terms of gymnastics prowess would draw media attention (kind of like the opposite of a mental shutdown... goro akechi ON THE CASE///SHOT DEAD)

but no like fr that'd be interesting if goro had a sort of "confidant" with her, trying to get to the bottom of the case abt dr. maruki.....

SORRY IF THSI MAKES NO SENSE I LITESRALLY JUST THOGUHT THIS UP JUST NOW. HEHE THANK U FOR THE ASK!!!

[kentuckyfriedmegumi]

oh HELL no. fuck this shit bruh i’m so SICK OF THE MEGUMI HATE AGENDA

i pride myself on being one of, if not THE biggest megumi defender in a jjk server with over 240k members, and it's one thing to hate in the server and ping me for a debate or argument, but to DM ME IN OWN PERSONAL MESSAGES a warning of your hate agenda idk shit pisses me off tf

rant incoming…

like this is one of my friends in the server (i know, how can u be friends with a megumi hater, it's complicated) and we always keep that shit IN the server. to literally DIRECT MESSAGE ME with some shit like this, like why the FUCK would i ever want to hear about this shit.

just write your stupid hate post and everyone else in the server will ping me about it later. you don't need to come to my dos to tell me about your endless hate agenda, i see that enough in a server of TWO HUNDRED AND FOURTY THOUSAND MEMBERS as is

and man i am ALWAYS down for a good megumi debate, like YES let me pick apart his character and tell you WHY the choices gege made were SO IMPORTANT to his development and the story, but seriously what the FUCK is this?????? this is like literally ASKING me to block you???

it's one thing if there is hate in the server and someone is like "oh time to tag KFM, she'll handle this." it's another to literally want to PROVOKE a response out of me bc man i'm not taking that bait???? go somewhere else with this bruh this is why i stopped messaging in there

like i could literally go ON AND ONNN about why megumi’s character is insanely important and impactful to the story. he is NOT your typical shonen deuteragonist and that is on PURPOSE!!!!! god forbid we have a male character in an action series that shows emotions and relies on them for his motivations and convictions

and it’s always the people who just think that he’s a loser or a bum or he never lives up to his potential that want to purposefully not understand the story or his writing that gege has so carefully crafted for megumi. like HE IS MEANT TO BE AN EMOTIONALLY DRIVEN CHARACTER GUYS THAT DOES NOT MAKE HIM LAME

and it’s one thing to just not vibe with megumi. that’s whatever like i don’t get it but hey he’s not everyone’s cup of tea, but why the FUCK are you hating sooooo much that you feel the need to write an ESSAY about your hatred towards this character UNPROVOKED ??? and why the FUCK are you dm’ing ME about it???? because i’m jjkcord’d number one megumi defender?? that’s in THE JJK SERVER not in our fucking dms. literally get that shit out of here bc i’m SO SICK of the megumi hate.

like at least in the server i can prepare myself and expect to see megumi hate. to MESSAGE ME OUT OF THE BLUE IN MY PERSONAL DMs literally has me seething at 11:40pm on a sunday fucking night.

i could say sooooo much more, but i’ve said all i really could with megumi’s character and i don’t feel the need to run it all into the ground the way these people do with their endless hate. get your fucking heads out of the fucking echo chamber that you have tunnel-visioned yourself into and learn that not everything in life needs to revolve around hating a fictional fucking character

[ugh-yoongi]

Congratulations on the milestone!✨✨

I wanted to request a bts headcanon! There was this one trend on tiktok last year that was like “you’re not dating but you’re not just friends either” lol so I guess like a bts in a situation type of thing? Thank you thank you! 💕

tysm!

i know exactly what trend you're talking about and i was never sure if that was supposed to be, like, an actual situationship or like that more cutesy in-between crush & dating stage so i'll try to do both.

once again tag teamed this with @hot-soop bc i have no original thoughts.

come tell me how wrong i am :)

headcanons: bts in a situationship

seokjin —

has the least situationship energy out of all of them imo. mr. domestic king of commitment probably wouldn't be able to handle the uncertainty of it, but could be convinced if the other party wasn't ready/didn't want to commit.

(let's be real, it's impossible to not be in love with him, so [rihanna voice] good luck with booking that situationship u speak of.)

thinks he's being chill and in actuality is being the least chill person alive. red ears & neck 25/8.

does the "let's just play one more round of mario kart" con until the next thing you know it's 2am and the only way you're getting home is an overpriced rideshare, so whoops, might as well stay over, what would you like for breakfast?

strikes me as the type that'd be similar in that in-between stage, too, but way more acts of service.

picnics in the park, polaroid pictures of things that remind him of you, beats that video game level you're stuck on without you even having to ask, rambles on and on about his webtoons, chill weekends spent together at home.

yoongi —

completely down for a situationship. might be made for it, actually. you don't even need to ask.

however. realizes he's Emotionally Compromised and has his "oh shit wait what the fuck" moment months in. good luck sorting that mess out!

yoongi: it is very obvious i have feelings for this person and it is very obvious where we stand with one another.

also yoongi: disappears for a week bc of work and doesn't say a word.

also also yoongi: casually shows up at 3am and wants to hang out like disappearing without a word wasn't at all weird and confusing as fuck.

also also also yoongi: has the nerve to be confused when you call it off because he doesn't seem interested.

spends the next few months overthinking literally everything and reappears with a wall of text detailing everything he likes about you.

in that more cutesy in-between: playlists, "do you wanna hear what i've been working on?", open the door please it's 1am and yoongi's outside with takeout, absolutely giddy when he gets to teach you about his interests.

hobi —

can't see him being all that different from the way he'd be in an actual relationship, tbh, which is both a blessing and a curse.

a f f e c t i o n a t e

(but is it "i like you and want to be with you" affection or "i do this with literally everyone there is no way to tell if it's something more" affection?)

king of overcommunicating! good morning texts, phone calls before bed, memes and silly pictures throughout the day.

wants to trade ootd pics. sends you one everyday even if you don't reciprocate. pouts for days if you playfully roast his fit, but sometimes he needs someone to be honest about those questionable shoes he wears.

somehow knows literally every person to exist. has a friend who works at that cool new club downtown. the gallery with that hot new exhibit. knows someone who knows someone who works with that band you can never get tickets to see.

ensures you will never want for anything while you're with him.

namjoon —

ooh boy.

quiet. a lil obsessive. observant. can definitely be jealous. the kind of guy who loves to think he's good at situationships until he's in one and realizes very quickly he's not.

has a natural urge to play games to test you then have an existential crisis about whether that makes him a bad person.

wants to have all of your attention but will not ask for it. wants intensity but questions whether that’s sustainable long term.

ghosts when he’s in his feelings but writes you long, thoughtful paragraphs when he’s drunk. "that one guy who jerked you around in college" vibes.

will break your back and your heart at the same time.

in that cute in-between: museum dates. meetups in the park in the middle of the night to stare at the stars and get all philosophical. let's go try out that new distillery and catch that new arthouse film after. does this guy even have friends? because it's been 8 years and you still haven't met them.

jimin —

fun until it isn't.

lively and sweet and easy until it isn't.

flirts with literally everyone but gets real petty and kinda mean if you do the same.

thinks he isn't good enough. wants compliments and validation. another chronic overthinker. playful banter until he takes it too seriously and needs reassurance that you do actually like him.

not a ghoster but also not good at ending things so just lets it go stale and wither away.

dates? drinking and dancing. maybe one of those sip and paints. tickets to the ballet. competition shows at his place with takeout.

cuddly and affectionate but why does he call all of his friends his soulmate?

in the in-between: loves showing you off. would probably love to do your makeup. sickeningly sweet comments on all your ig selfies. always holding your hand.

taehyung —

intense. has a tendency to get a lil self-centered and disappear in that big noggin of his.

physical rather than emotional. will blow your back out in 10 different ways before he tells you he likes you.

(and only does this at 5am when he's drunk and just spent the last half hour crying to jimin on the phone.)

insecure so he plays it carefree and silly, but, dear reader, it was not, in fact, carefree and silly.

golden hour. takes the best photos of you on film. paints you silly things and nearly cries when you actually display them. can't cook but tries making a date of cooking together anyway; cons you into paying for the takeout after it inevitably fails. record stores. red wine.

jungkook —

either a major fuckboy or the most sensitive man on the planet there is really no in between here.

either never commits or is ready to get married the second time you hang out.

no chill. someone please remind him to be normal about this.

j e a l o u s !

facetimes you in the middle of the night just because.

learns all your favorite songs on guitar. loves a photobooth; keeps the film strip in his wallet. teaches you how to play video games but gets really pouty when you wind up being better than him. diners at 2am; a milkshake with two straws. obnoxious gym selfies. pretends he doesn't want to sing your girl group songs at noraebang yet suspiciously knows all the choreography.

shy shy shy

[hmshermitcraft]

U want crackships??? I'll give u crackships!!

Mumbo Jumbo and V1 ULTRAKILL

Literally only because of the Mumbo vampire hc and the fact that they'd both "drink" blood.

Mumbo is kinda weird about drinking blood, it's basically cannibalism, even though he isn't human and it's a vegetarian diet he feels bad when the hermits show up for the monthly blood drive so Mumbo has plenty of caprisun blood bags.

V1 has no such qualms. V1 rolls around in gore like a fucked up little dog, V1 will do anything for a lil sippy of blood, V1 is absolutely flabbergasted when Mumbo is hesitant to eat in front of others.

Where V1 comes from the only one who had an issue with how it ate was Gabriel, and even he got over it eventually since V1 was not about to listen to an angel of all things. Plus there's more important things to worry about, like surviving in hell.

Trying to introduce V1 to the rest of the hermits is a nightmare because V1 is a homicidal maniac who's always hungry, but Mumbo manages it. V1 actually takes a liking to Xisuma because of his past as the doomguy so they manage to bond over their shared experience of battling into/through/out of hell and then killing God. Mumbo is thankful for this because at least V1 is learning that not everything that moves is a snack bar waiting to be eaten.

V1 brings Gabriel along one day because it's good to introduce your boyfriends to each other and Grian catches a glimpse of another previously brainwashed, now wanted criminal angel guy and is like "hell yeah let's be friends" and Gabriel is like "what the fuck is this weird bird???"

V1 being completely unable to speak and also literally a robot makes communication about feelings a bit difficult for Mumbo "emotionally constipated" Jumbo but they make it work with insane games of 20 questions and charades, which diffuses any arguments because it's so silly to watch this murder machine responsible for the extinction of the human race (????) try and communicate "why the fuck did u take my phone charger, i needed that" by gesturing wildly and beeping.

Mumbo lets V1 run wild under Scar's various mountain projects turned mob spawners whenever it gets a little antsy/overwhelmed with the amount of people it can't kill. After it's done mumbo has to pressure wash it so it isn't tracking gore literally everywhere because it has no issue with being covered in guts.

Mumbo is a massive, tall, wide, strong man, and V1 is just a little guy made for speed more than strength because u don't need to be terribly strong to shoot a gun. So basically whenever he wants, he can just pick V1 up and take it anywhere he wants. V1 doesn't mind because Gabriel does it too. What mumbo couldn't have foreseen is lifting V1 up, only to then be lifted up himself by Gabriel, creating a tiered uppies train. This has become a sort of tradition, sometimes V1 will even lift Grian before then being picked up, making a four layer uppies stack.

"hi I'm grain, this is my boyfriend Mumbo, and this is Mumbo's "boy"friend V1, and this is V1's boy"friend" Gabriel."

I don't know what this is, I've just been playing ULTRAKILL and, in my infinite defense, u did ask for this.

-carrie

Sometimes people will ask Mumbo how they got together, in that cute way that happens with couples. Mumbo has no idea. One day he was dating Grian, the next he was also dating an enthusiastic robot with a thirst for blood.

Once V1 gets the hang of 'no killing or maiming' there's at least plenty of hermits willing to duel with it. V1 always looks a little too happy about winning. None of the hermits even care at this point, they've all seen it carried under Mumbo's arm like a misbehaving dog. Ruins the intimidation factor a little.

[girlboypersonthingy]

Omg if you want can you write the fluff alphabet for Keith pls??? 💜

FUCK YEAH I LOVE ME SOME SOFT KEEF ❤️‍🔥 Thanks again for the rq anon 😘 Got the fluff template from @the-coldest-goodbye cuz I’m lazy 🙃

Keith- Fluff Alphabet 💌

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Okay, in public or in front of like literally anyone, he’s not super affectionate. He’s still nice to you and will occasionally reach for your hand in front of other voltron members. He just doesn’t like PDA very much. He doesn’t like the attention it draws to him. Behind closed doors tho…omg this boy is like so clingy. He just wants to hold you for the rest of his life, you’re so nice to hold. He likes to show affection physically rather than emotionally. He’s kinda dumb when it comes to this romance relationship stuff, he has a hard time explaining his feelings so he’d rather show you how much he loves you with hugs and kisses and cuddles and gentle touches.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

You guys had to have clicked right away when you met. I’m sure Keith is difficult to befriend let alone date so he probably really enjoyed your company and support as a friend to keep you around. He probably felt really safe and at ease with you, like he could be his true authentic self around you. You guys really lean on each other. And because he feels so himself around you, you fall for the purest version of Keith, the real Keith. And he falls for your loyalty and kindness and faith in him.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

KEEF LOVES CUDDLES WITH U OMG. Like I said, he’s emotionally constipated and has a hard time voicing his love for you so he shows it instead and due to your busy schedules, you only get alone time at night before bed and early in the morning if you’re both up before your alarm. So every night before you both doze off and every morning about an hour before your alarm goes off, he’s stuck to you like a koala on a tree branch. It’s the best couple hours of his entire day, everyday. He will cuddle you in any way he can. He’ll be the big spoon or the little spoon, he’ll hold you while you’re facing each other, if he’s in a good deep sleep he’ll lay his head on your chest or stomach with an arm slung over you as he snores. He just wants to be touching you. He needs the physical contact.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

Yes and no. Keith definitely wants this war to be over and he wants to go home and have a normal life with you but he’s also never going to give up on helping his friends protect the universe. If he had to, he’d stay in space forever just to protect all of it. But he does occasionally daydream about you and him living together somewhere in the desert or the country maybe where there’s not a lot of people and it’s quiet. Keith is a mess in the kitchen, please keep him away from the stove. He can help you cut stuff up or make the salad but other than that, he’ll burn everything and anything you ask him to cook. Cleaning on the other hand, he can do that. Just imagine this…Keith wearing old scrappy clothes with his hair pulled back by a headband or bandana and he’s deep cleaning your whole apartment/house with those big yellow dish gloves on. Omg hes ur housewife. Sure he can be messy and disorganized at times too but he’ll roll up his sleeves and deep clean when it’s obvious it needs to be done. Just plz cook for him and he’ll clean for you.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

If Keith had to break up with you, I seriously feel like he would still want to be your friend. As much as Keith blows up and loses his temper, the break up would be soft and slow and gently. He wouldn’t want to lose you completely so he’d ask you to be his friend still. So things didn’t work romantically…it’s fine, just don’t leave him behind. He still has love for you. He’ll always care about you.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Keith ain’t the marriage type. He’s just one of those people who thinks marriage is stupid and pointless and too expensive and dramatic. He doesn’t need a big fancy ceremony or a piece of signed paper to prove his love for you. Screw it. He’s gonna call you his wife/husband/partner/spouse no matter what anyone else says. If you really want to get properly married tho, he’d agree and go along with it to make you happy. But he’d be in charge of the guest list…which will only have like 10 people on it bc he also doesn’t like crowds or big parties.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Physically, he’s so gentle with you. He’s always worried he’s gonna hurt you or make you uncomfortable. He holds you so tenderly, he kisses you so lightly. Keith spends most days fighting off training bots, sparring with Shiro and often engaging in battle with an actual enemy. When it comes to you, he treats you like a one-of-a-kind piece of stained glass. You’re the one person he’s soft with. Emotionally…he’s stubborn and short tempered and easily overwhelmed. He’ll snap at you every now and then, he can’t help it. He’s never mad or annoyed with you, it just comes out in his voice and his gestures are harsh as he speaks to you. He tries very hard to be patient and understanding with you. He’s really trying. Give him a break plz.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Keith loves your hugs, it’s one of the most comforting things you can offer him. He likes to hug you a lot, he’ll just randomly hug you throughout your day. But when he’s upset or frustrated or feeling stressed and scared, he’ll hug you really tight and for a while. He’ll just hold you close, arms wrapped fully around your torso as he hides his face in your neck or shoulder. Hugs make him feel so much better, they remind him that he is real and has feelings and that someone cares about him.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

I think Keith would wait a while to actually say it to your face. He would be really nervous and wouldn’t want to rush things or make you feel like you have to say it back. In the meantime, he often slips the phrase to you sneakily and without grabbing your attention first. He’ll mumble it to himself after you finish a good round of training with him and he’s glowing with pride at how amazing you are. He’ll whisper it softly when you fall asleep next to him. He’ll mouth the words as he hugs you tightly, imagining how the words would sound if you said them back to him right now. He just needs time…

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Keith gets extremely jealous but not all the time. He sees you talking to some cool alien or even joking around with Lance, he’s whatever about it. He trusts you so he’s not worried. Now if another galra tried to approach you, oh boy is there gonna be a fight. It’s just a galra thing, he feels that they are more of a threat bc he is also part galra. One time, another member of the blade was standing just a little too close to you and Keith didn’t know what he was saying to you but he just had a bad feeling about it. But he wasn’t trying to flirt with you at all, he was actually asking about Keith and how long you’ve know him, just small talk. Keith stomped over and straight up pushed you behind him, glaring at his teammate in front of him. You had to explain that it was all innocent chit chat and calm him down. Yeah, he’s dramatic asf when he wants to be. He’ll kill a bitch for you, no hesitation.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Kisses with Keith are always soft and slow and lingering. He doesn’t move at a fast pace, even when making out. He takes his time and enjoys it and cherishes the moment. He’s also not sure exactly how to kiss so he goes slow and follows your lead. It’s not often that you two kiss, only in the privacy of your room when you both know you won’t be interrupted or occasionally you’ll share a lingering gentle kiss in the hangar in front of the team after a long and scary mission. Keith loves kissing your lips, he likes that he can feel you kiss him back. He’ll kiss your cheeks and forehead sometimes but he craves the feeling of your lips returning the gesture, ya know? He really likes when you kiss pretty much anywhere that’s not his face. Kiss that boy on the shoulder, neck, back, hands or arms and he’s a flustered mess. Not that he minds face kisses from you tho.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He’s so awkward omfg. He is kind of on the fence about kids. He likes them but he’s unsure how to act around them. He mostly just listens to kids ramble about stuff and he smiles and nods along and offers the occasional “oh really? Wow. That’s crazy.” He would like a kid of his own one day but not anytime soon. He needs time to learn and mature before he has his own kid.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Pretty much every morning with Keith is spent the same way…he’ll wake up earlier than the alarm is set just to cuddle and love on you before you have to go about your busy day. This (and at night before you guys fall asleep) is the only time you two can really spend quality time together. Fighting in an intergalactic war leaves very little time for you two to hang out and bond. So he loves sleepy, early mornings with you where neither of you talk, you just hold each other and place soft kisses on each others face.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Nights go pretty much the same way as mornings. The first hour that you two are awake and the last hour or so before you two fall asleep is spent in silence while you just hold each other close and cherish the moment. You don’t get much time to be clingy and romantic so bed time is the best time. He’ll plop into bed with you and wrap you in his arms as you’re both dozing off.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Keith would take some time to fully open up to you. I’m sure he probably took a while to open up to Shiro too. He’s just a closed off, secretive kind of person. He doesn’t want his business on display for everyone to know. As friends, he probably told you about his home life and his dad but it wasn’t until you two had been dating for a while that he finally let down his walls and told you all of the things that weigh on him. He trusts you with his life now.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

👀 boy has a very short temper and gets very easily annoyed and over stimulated. He’s definitely snapped at you before and he will most likely snap at you again. He’s always quick to apologize and try to explain himself. He just loses it sometimes, there’s a lot going on and he has a hard time coping. He’ll bottle everything up and stay quiet until it all boils over and explodes out of him. He snaps at pretty much anyone and everyone, don’t take it personally. He’s even yelled at Shiro before. He’s working on it tho…he swears.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Both??? He’ll definitely forget things every now and then, sorry he’s got so many thoughts in his head at one time, sometimes the things you tell him go in one ear and out the other. BUT he does remember a lot about you too. He’ll never forget the gorgeous color of your eyes and your favorite food and your favorite color. He’ll remember many cute moments throughout your relationship but also if you mention that one time that one thing happened, he’ll be like “I did? Oh…okay if you say so.” He might forget an anniversary or your birthday too, don’t be mad. He’s really sorry…just remind him and he’ll make it up to you, pinky promise.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Keith’s favorite moment in your whole relationship is when you first kissed him. It wasn’t on the lips, you had kissed him on the cheek when he was frustrated with not being able to beat a certain level on the training simulator. He was just having a moment, shouting out in anger as he flopped down on the floor. As he tried to catch his breath, you approached him without saying a word and sat in front of him with a sweet smile. He watched you for a second before you leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to his cheek then followed it with the words “Don’t give up. Keep trying…I believe in you, Keith.” He’s pretty sure that’s the moment he knew he really loved you and he also knew that you really loved him back. He felt so stupid and ugly in that moment of weakness and anger but you showed him unconditional love anyways. He’ll never forget that.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Keith is very protective of you, especially when you are out in the middle of battle with the team. He often insists that you and him stick together regardless of what Shiro or Allura have to say. He’ll protect you by keeping a close eye on you and having your back when you need him. You do pretty much the same for him. You watch out for each other always.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

As far as dates, anniversaries and gifts, Keith’s terrible. He’s never been in a relationship before so he has no idea what to do. If you give him ideas and share what you are planning to do for him, he’ll take mental notes and learn from you and then he’ll try his best those things. With everyday tasks tho, Keith is the sweetest and most attentive partner ever. He asks you how you slept every morning, he’ll ask you if you’ve eaten yet today, if he hasn’t seen you around all day he’ll go searching for you just to check up on ya. He’ll bring you water in the training room if he’s not already there with you, he’ll kiss you every morning and every night, he’ll play with your hair and gently scratch your back when you’re stressed or upset, he’ll listen intently when you need to rant or when you’re excitedly explaining something you like to him. He’s a great bf, he’s so involved with you. Such a sweet pea ❤️‍🔥

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

Keith loves to shut himself off from you, especially when you’re having a bad day yourself. He feels like a burden sometimes, like he’s damaged goods that you never asked for. He knows he can trust you and confide in you but he worries that he’ll only make you more overwhelmed and stressed if he tells you how he’s feeling. Most of his bad days are spent avoiding you in hopes of not burdening you with his moody attitude. You always end up finding him and convincing him to open up to you. Once he gets it all off his chest tho, he feels soooo relieved. He just doesn’t want you to ever feel like his feelings matter more than yours.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

NOT AT ALL. He doesn’t give a fuck, especially with you. I mean…you guys are already dating and he’s never been super into his appearance so ??? why would he start worrying about it now? He has other things to worry about. He’s clean and well kept so …what now?

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

Yesssss, he’s a wreck when he’s away from you for too long. It’s one things to be away from you all day, but when missions are going on for days or weeks at a time with the blade of marmora, he gets so depressed and also so much more irritated. You’re the light of his life so when he can’t see you for several days in a row, he starts to unravel. You just bring him so much peace of mind, without you he doesn’t know how to cope with his emotions. He has no one else to talk to…💔

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

HE SLEEPS SO FUCKIN GOOD WITH YOU IN HIS BED NEXT TO HIM!!! You’ve walked in on him sleeping before and he’s pretty quiet, but whenever you sleep beside him, bro snores like a bear as he clings to you. Sometimes he wakes you with his loud ass snores and his aggressive snuggling but he’s having the best sleep of his entire life rn, you can’t bring yourself to wake him. One time, you gently nudged him awake and whispered “You’re snoring so loud. Turn on your side.” And he straight up went “Huh? Oh…okay.” then fell right back into his loud snoring a second later. Sorry but you kind of signed up for this.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

The only turn off for Keith is a liar. If he can’t trust his partner, he doesn’t even want to be with them. He wants you to be able to tell him anything and he wants to be able to trust you with everything. Just don’t ever lie to him and there’s nothing that can tear you two apart.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Not only does this mf snore loud as hell and suffocate you with his cuddles but he also drools sometimes. One time he drooled on your face and the grossed out scream that came from you startled him awake. He apologized profusely but you just had to tell the rest of the team about it the next morning. He’s never gonna live this down, it’s just too funny.

[ca-suffit]

neilcfreak hasn't been seen in the fandom in a *long* time, so kind of fucking weird and obvious that nalyra gets a bait ask (which she knows is a bait ask) saying it *must* be bullying that caused it and listing every way neil was a good person. where tf has neilcfreak been much in the last year? besides a few months ago when she was trying to cover up for white fandom. nobody cares about u girl, nobody is rly sending these asks about u except ur own friends (or u lol).

anyway who wants neilcfreak's racist receipts :)

last year, ao3 was getting called out for never following up with their promises made in the wake of BLM 2020 to better protect users against racist harassment. neil and a black user commented on the same post, the black user replying to neil's comment u can see above of "if u don't like it make ur own site lol."

this white user (futureevilscientist) then random af pulled the asks out and tagged the black user at the start of the post to talk all this shit AT them fsr?

then later, neil shows up herself.

this is the part u cannot *cannot* say is not racist. neil is directly replying to a reblog of *someone else's main post* and placing full blame for a "call out post" on the *black* user.

she then pulls out her white jewish shit to speak over the main topic, which is racism / antiblackness.

playing oppression olympics can be done by any marginalized group but it usually works the best for white ppl because white ppl get the most sympathy when doing this (u want the most shining example, how often are we talking about white gay oppression in this fandom above racism / antiblackness, which is the *actual theme* of the show...or even gay oppression through a black pov, since u see louis experience that constantly. how much are we told that this show is rly about white gays and nothing else?). ppl assume whiteness is more innocent by default so will pile more on a black user for "being aggressive" towards a *white* jewish user without needing any proof. that's what neil was counting on here. she also then had a bizarre, loud breakdown on her account for extra assurance she'd be seen as "the real victim" (for making a stupidly racist comment in public). ohh yeah weaponize those white tears girl. she then "quit" tumblr for a while and when she came back, as mentioned in the linked post above, she had to again mention "drama" for good measure. "remember how I was bullied off this site u guys :("

white fandom was all over her dramatic distraction posts btw (nalyra commented on them too, so she is v aware this happened). v few people reached out to the black user or cared about the shit they were dealing with.

these white fandom ppl *never* have any receipts of bullying either, they just *say* it happens and flock to give hugs so it looks like lots of support is happening for a real "issue." but it's not real. everything they do is meant to manipulate u. this nalyra ask is still doing that.

when ur told what to think about someone or u can't find evidence of things happening beyond what anyone, even a group of ppl, *tells u* is happening then u need to rly remain suspicious of the reality of it.

these are asks that the black user got after this stuff happened. so now we've created a new issue from nothing and we're not talking about racism or how ur bullying a black user over literally nothing anymore. now it's suddenly all about poor neilcfreak and her white jewish identity and victimhood from a big, bad black fan. she's gotta make this all make her look like the real victim to cover up how embarrassed and stupid she felt for being called out on saying racist shit.

this is why white ppl need to understand these abusive techniques and get on ppl's ass when they pull this, not just leave it up to black and brown ppl to do. white fandom will cry all the white tears possible and claim ur talking over a white jewish person, being antisemitic. it's an attempt to emotionally manipulate u, keep talking (think of how often claims of antisemitism are used to shut down anyone being pro palestine, it's the same shit). this is racism. this is weaponizing an identity to cause harm to a black person cuz u were caught saying racist shit and want to deflect. if neilcfreak wasn't a huge racist she'd have *also* called this out and told ppl to stop doing this on her behalf. that would require her pulling her head out of her ass first tho and not sending these anons herself prbly.

I was looking for a different receipt to end on but found this instead, so let's talk about this too since we're here

here's neil after this shit went down, trying to make anne rice all kinds of marginalized identities so ppl can excuse her abusive shit too. she never said she was queer and she never identified as trans. u can't just label ppl shit because stuff they said sounds "close enough." she did enough harm as a cishet white woman can u all fuck off already with wanting to find more excuses for never wanting anyone to criticize this piece of shit.

good riddance, wretched bitch.

[sparklingdemon]

hi, pkmn monochrome anon. im off for once, but unfortunately not on my main. hopefully that's cool with you.

honestly, im skeptical of the idea that hacker cody is nearly as bad cody said they were.

One of the most important things you learn in CBT is the distinction between feeling and thought and action. Hacker cody felt that the people around them were the reason they were depressed. But, Trainer Cody says multiple times that they knew better, and never elaborates if they actually hurt anyone.

Cody also demonstrably has issues with internalized ableism throughout pkmn monochrome. they demean themself over symptoms of depression they likely inherited from hacker cody even before it is weaponized against them. half of their internal conflict has to do with the fact that they cannot be expected to function on the same level as a player, and feeling shitty abaout it. they literally have a giant depression turtle that says "you should abandon cody because these problems make them an inherently worthless person undeserving of love".

so, it makes it ambiguous how much of cody's criticism of the hacker has to do with the hacker actually being an ass, and how much of it is actually just cody being incredibly harsh about their struggles. especially considered even before the players came in, cody was already being emotionally abused over these traits for 3 years.

literally the only criticism about hacker cody that holds any weight as intentionally cruel so far is their treatment of the protagonists. but considering the heavy allusions regarding how exactly they died, i don't think it could reasonably be expected of them to do the right thing in that situation. "yeah sorry you're about to kill yourself here's custody of two children. good luck i guess"

I really don't think its fair to compare them to the players intentionally abusing trainer Cody over the span of two years simply out of amusement despite having all the resources and support available to give them a good life.

now, is all of this certain? no. it's also worthy to note cody also has incentive to lie or refuse to elaborate on hacker cody's behavior considering how they've already been treated under the perception that they are completely unrelated.

i am admittedly worried that this does come across as somewhat infantilizing of hacker cody. i also feel like that was also partially the reason they were driven to this point in-universe. i think hacker cody was also sort of stuck between feeling like their problems weren't "that bad", when the problem wasn't "you're not trying hard enough to take care of yourself" but "you literally have a fucked up brain disease that wants to kill you".

im not denying hacker cody was a flawed person. nor am i trying to say that having shitty mental health is an absolvement of what you do. or reduce cody to just "they were sick lol".

but what we have of them is kind of just a capsule magnifying the worst of them. so much that i feel like they're defined more by their constant rumination. and i really don't think that it's fair to them.

there's more i want to write, but it kind of gets more personal from there. and i feel like i can't really articulate everything i want to say in a coherent and cohesive manner. sorry about that.

also ive already written like 13 paragraphs haha

tldr: hacker cody is a poor little meow meow imo

👀 once again i cannot comment on hacker cody without spoilers but this is very tasty thank u… very interesting points being made here. thank you for coming off of anon to share………