#5 years is a hell of a lot of time compared to how long I've lived so far

[sentienceisoverrated]

Turning 14 in the middle of Covid was a trip. Everything online talked about how 14 was the year of discovering yourself, of maturing and figuring out what you enjoyed and hated and I was just. Locked in my house for most of that year. Old enough to think and understand, young enough that nothing really made much sense anyway. Those months feel like half my childhood they were so long. What the fuck even happened that year?

[kaizokuou-ni-naru]

What! Are your top five reveals in One Piece! Which ones made you go “holy shit” or “hell yeah” the most!

i'm taking reveal here to mean 'points at which previously-hidden information is revealed to the audience,' not just where we're told something new. so:

THE FREEST MAN ON THE SEA: maybe not as dramatic or seismic as some other things on this list, but to me luffy telling rayleigh that to him being the pirate king just means being the freest in the world is the single most important thing we ever learn about luffy's character, and it defines the themes of the whole series. it recontextualizes everything about luffy and the way he interacts with the world and the way he pursues his goal because now we finally know what that goal actually is, and what it means to him. and for the whole first half of the story we don't know this! it's easy to forget because we're, what, six hundred chapters past it now, but we get all the way to sabaody without really knowing what drives luffy, and then we get it and it slides into place perfectly.

WORLD SANK: a recent one, but so satisfying and well-placed. the sunken world reveal is the best kind of big lore reveal, to me, because it's something that makes so much sense it was completely possible to predict it years ago (and people did), and now that it has been confirmed, it's opened up a massive world of implications and questions that are incredibly fun to think about. i'm really excited to see where the story goes with it.

NIKA: i'm sort of rolling everything we learn about gear 5/nika/joyboy in the 1040 chapters of wano together here; i've written at length before on this blog about why i like the nika reveal so much, so i'll just say now that it takes one piece's most fundamental and powerful themes and symbolism (liberation and joy and the sun) which have been built up across the story and reveals to you that those things are a real literal force in the narrative strong enough to turn a draconic tyrant into a garden snake. and having established what he has now about nika, the way oda has continued to explore the implications of that figure existing in the world has been absolutely fabulous to read.

RAIZOU IS SAFE: a smaller and more arc-specific one compared to some of the others on this list, but i just really like the way this reveal is done. the interval between the dressrosa team's arrival on zou and the reveal that raizou was there the whole time isn't even particularly long, but it's the execution which makes it; the devastation of the city, the solemnity of the whole moment, inuarashi and nekomamushi bowing their heads, luffy and the strawhats' reactions. i like the minks a lot, and this is the moment that defines them as a group, as well as establishing the themes of loyalty and sacrifice that will go on to become very prominent in wano.

ROGER WAS DYING: i've talked before about how i really like the handling of roger as a figure and how our knowledge of him evolves and becomes more personal and human over the course of the story. the turning point in that evolution is the introduction of rayleigh; his reveal that roger was not caught, that he turned himself in because he was dying, and that they found the truth of the world there at the end of the grand line. it shifts the whole presentation of the story; we've been told about roger from the very start of the very first chapter, and it's here that we learn the information we thought we had about him has been woefully incomplete. there's a bigger mystery here, one greater than just 'what treasure did roger leave.' and i really like we get this context about roger in the very same scene we learn what it means to luffy to be the pirate king.

[leidensygdom]

Ok, artfight thoughts time! In bullet points for readability's sake!

I've beaten my record for art points/sizing this year! I made 16 artworks on 2021, 38 in 2022, 57 in 2023, and 55 in 2024. (It's been technically 2 less in 57,but I had a couple of pictures with extra characters in 2024)

However, out of these 57 from 2023, there were 14 fullbodies, 8 halfbodies and 36 portraits.

This year I have done 20 portraits, 15 halfbodies and 25 fullbodies- Which did take quite more time than last years' portrait rain! I wish I could've at least given the remaining revenges a portrait. I got 2542.75 points for it!

I've received a bit over 60 drawings this year, which is def a record. First time I end up with an actual negative ratio- 45%. It's been a fight to keep it up.

(if i hadn't got food poisoning, an uti and three periods in july maybe i'd have got the chance to get that up to 50% i've been in spain with and without the S dfhguhdf)

This year has been very enjoyable, besides being sick for a bunch of it. A lot of art- Some of which I've shared, some I'll share once it gets posted. Very honoured about it!

However, it's also the first year I've had to report a bunch of stuff, which (admittedly) has not been handled well by the moderation team. I got a traced attack and a kink-related attack (which i do not allow), I've had friends get the same, and a friend had a whole character traced and stolen. Most of these reports did not really get handled, and even the art thief didn't get banned. That's been quite stressful!

Out of all my attacks, 48 have been revenges and only 7 have been attacks I started myself. I had a list of well over 30 people I wanted to attack, which I barely managed to scratch the surface of

@totesnotaustralian did a wonderful sheet to track artfight data and such, and I have some stats from it! (Ignore the revenge number, I messed up the sheet there jgxhdhjf)

While my first weeks were almost team stardust (friendly fire hell was real), a lot of the later attacks were for Seafoam! And... Here's the character data- With how much they've been drawn each year and in total!

Some fun details and tendencies from this thing:

Vyxander has been drawn the most this year, with 13, which is also the most I've ever got a character drawn in a single artfight. Argyros followed up with 12 on his debut year. Previously, the record was at 10- Which the Onirist got on their debut year.

Some of the new characters this year were fairly popular (like Argy at 12, Starborn at 6). Older characters (other than Vyxander) have been drawn far less in favour of the new ones. Yxala and Relent got 3 attacks each- Which is surprising, given they were the main picks previous years! Poor polycule!

Urion keeps being my most drawn character at a whooping 24, having been drawn 8 times each year. Their post campaign version was more popular on their first year, but has been drawn just 3 times this one- But it's been wonderful art anyhow!!

On the underdogs: Areel has been drawn just once on his debut year (understandably, given his wild armor). Laestis has actually not been drawn, it was a NPC of hers who did, which I counted as a Lae drawing. Osten has been drawn 5 times--compared to being the only one to not get art last year. Mythannae and Yden did not get any art, despite Yden winning that popularity poll I ran a while ago.

and uh, that's quite the long post. I have a lot of art to share from Artfight- Keep an eye for it in this month, because it's quite the backlog!! If you've made it down here, thank you for putting up with this long boy

[meatball-headache]

I dont have a non-spoilery screenshot for The Sacrifice, so, please enjoy this survey!

Chiclet's not allowed to read this yet, so shhhh

Howling... full moon... heh. He's a Wereframe.

So, once again I'm captivated by Warframe's approach to storytelling. It's unique, in my experience—and I'll be glad to admit my experience is pretty limited. MMOs tend to dominate all your time, y'know?

I've heard how with The Second Dream they started to take the story in a different direction, that is, they introduced a lot more cinematic scenes—and, man, they pack a punch. Honestly, I think introducing this style later in the game, years down the road for some players and still many months for myself—it's very effective. I keep using analogies like playing Tetris to level 100 and then suddenly you get a scene that introduces the pieces' names. If Warframe had been this from the beginning, it still would have been good, but the impact of the surprise wouldn't have been there, and that moment still shines so brightly for me. The game would just be a fun grind to kill some time without it, but with that "This is what you are" scene, the whole game just took on a profound, sacred aspect that can't be topped.

...and yet...

No, no, The Sacrifice isn't better than The Second Dream, but, I am surprised. See, I've long known two things: one, you can look at the Codex and see all the quests in the game. Angels of the Zariman is there right from the beginning, except it says "Prerequisite: The New War." Whispers in the Walls is there right from the beginning, except it says "Prerequisite: The New War." Jade Shadows is there from the beginning, except it says "Prerequisite: The New War."

The New War does not appear in my Codex.

The second thing I've long known? The New War is going to be a big deal.

There's something else that's been stuck in my craw for a long time. What's the Ropalolyst? There's a mission on Jupiter that can't be done because it requires the quest The Chimera: Prologue. That quest... also doesn't appear in my Codex? So, there are some quests that aren't in the Codex...

Compared to FFXIV, there's no comparison. A classic MMORPG is quest-dense with wall-to-wall dialogue and almost nonstop cutscenes. On the other end of the coin, the other type of game I'm most familiar with is Soulsbornes, where there's almost no story in-game; it's more similar to the NES classics where you turn on the game, press Start, and fight stuff until you see credits. Warframe, of course, doesn't need to be FFXIV, but what's exciting is the hint that there's something behind it all, and there's still some secrets I don't know about.

I did Apostasy: Prologue and was really surprised to find out that it's a one-mission quest that sets up the next story quest. I wonder if it released at the same time as The Sacrifice? I was thinking I'd do Apostasy tonight, The Sacrifice tomorrow... well, since Apostasy was basically just one cutscene, I had to do The Sacrifice. I'll get into the details later, but...

What the...

Well. We found the Chimera Prologue. Hell, we found the Chimera, didn't we?

This is what I mean. Once again, I'm astounded by the game's turns. So, Prelude to War has... chapters?! That's never been a thing before. That explains why Chimera Prologue wasn't in my Codex. Maybe The New War is one of these chapters? No, no, for what a big deal The New War is, it must be its whole own system. It must be something as big as Duviri. It's got to be something.

None of the quests in this game have been big enough to warrant chapters. I'm guessing it's not that each "chapter" is just its own mission, no. Each chapter must be the size of a normal quest, right? Around 3-5 missions, cutscenes between a couple...

Just want to throw this in, I really like how Warframe just doesn't give a shit about throwing something weird at you without explanation. You get an objective "Search the lab." Search for what? Is it glowing? Am I supposed to use my scanner on it? Turn into the kid and blast it with my void beam? Walk up to it and press the button? Am I looking for a console to use, an item to pick up, damage to get curious about? I appreciate that Warframe seems to trust the player to figure it out. They trust the player to figure out that there's something to figure out. ...which might be a little optimistic on their part, because I did have to look up what to do on those Kuva siphon missions...

FFXIV's narrative is massive and non-stop. I have to wait four months for the next patch, but every patch always ends with a big fight, and then Y'shtola puzzling over some magical mystery, saying, "I'll let you know when I've figured something out." When the patch comes out, you talk to her in the same place, "Perfect timing! I just wanted to let you know I've figured something out." A new player would get uninterrupted flow and never know when one patch ends and another begins, unless they clue in on the little narrative trick. But, like I said, me, I've always played patches day one, and then I have months between patches.

If I played Warframe the same way... well, the way I'm playing Warframe now, is that I'm going at an absolute snail's pace, tiptoeing my way through the quests and spending a lot of time leveling things and grinding all the time.

I'm not explaining myself properly. Let me try again.

Warframe's quests released months or more apart, as did FFXIV's. But FFXIV's are meant to be continuous. Warframe's feel like they need to have space between them, because it's not a continuous narrative from one to the next. I'm not saying the story is disjointed or makes no sense; but imagine if it were FFXIV, and you do the quest where you fight Ifrit and all that, and then the next quest is to do the banquet and fight Titan, and then the next quest is to fight Garuda. Played back to back, it'd feel like there's vast gaps between them, both narratively and level-wise.

Maybe I just have a shit memory for lore? Warframe's quests always feel like they're talking about characters I should be extremely familiar with. Or, maybe I'm just used to less-well-written games that explicitly hand you reminders of these characters that haven't been mentioned in several minutes.

So, The Sacrifice is all about Ballas. I don't really know who Ballas is, but this quest has the feeling of "Finally, we're going to take on Ballas." But, I have heard about him. In The Second Dream, we see that Margulis was talking to Ballas. He might've been mentioned in Chains of Harrow? Or, no... I think it was The Silver Grove, where we had dialogue from I don't remember who, someone who was building Warframes for Ballas, I think, and regretted it because they were doing horrible things, so her last Warframe was Titania, to protect the forest. But where I know Ballas from the most is the song, "For Narmer." I don't know the context in-game, but you can't listen to "We All Lift Together" on Youtube without getting recommended the rest. There's a lyric that says "Praise the wise and mighty Ballas" in it. I thought they were saying "balance" at first, but then I thought, are they saying someone's name?

Ballas is a little like Ludwig from Bloodborne. If you've been paying attention, you have hints and snippets of this guy's role in the story. If you're like me, you take one little hint, dwell on it, obsess over it, and when the grand reveal finally comes, oh how grand it is! Ludwig, Ballas, Ketenramm... okay, maybe not Ketenramm.

Warframe has this unshakable feeling that there was some plot between quest beats that I missed. Same thing with just... the game. Ghoul Purge! Thermia Fractures! ...do I know what that's about? Was there some quest to introduce those, and now they're just in the game? It's like fighting Yojimbo or Typhon at the Gold Saucer when you've been playing FFXIV for three weeks and you're level 37. Am I supposed to know who this is? Oh well, gotta do my dailies! Or the... Rathuum? Where you fight... I had to look up her name... Kela De Thaym, on Sedna. The thing has this feeling like we're old rivals, her dialogue suggests she's finally going to get us for all the times we've foiled her before! But, lady, we just met you. Actually, we haven't even met you! We just showed up at this new node and you're going, "Finally we settle things!"

Don't misunderstand, I'm not complaining, it's just a very unique feeling about the game's whole quest style.

There's something else, too. There always is, you know me.

You ever get into a new series, books, movies, games, whatever? There's already three seasons but you're just finding out about it now, so you eat it all up and you're excited to learn there's going to be a new season next year. It comes and you watch it and... it just feels different? They got new writers, or the pacing is weird, something's just not clicking. And then next year another new season and, yeah it's just not as good. Or, music, people do this with music all the time, right?

When I first got into Warframe, Angels of the Zariman was the new patch. I didn't play it, obviously, don't know anything about it, but, I wonder if, when I get to that point, then everything from then on is going to feel like "new" Warframe, and just not have the same impact as the "original" stuff? I know me; I'm certain I'm going to be overly aware of the dividing line, and look for changes.

Also? In The Sacrifice, we learn that Margulis was sentenced to the Jade light. There's a new Warframe named Jade, and in fact a whole new quest called Jade Shadows. Clearly, this "Jade" thing has been long foreshadowed (lol) and must tie into the story deeply. I just thought it was a cool new Warframe they made because they didn't have one starting with J already. My playing these old quests with hints of knowledge of the future is an interseting perspective; anyone playing these things back when they were new wouldn't have this "Ah, so this is where Jade comes from!" moment... but at the same time, they get what I won't, they get a "Holy shit they're finally making a Jade Warframe?!" (Now that I think about it, that does kind of explain why this warranted a whole new Eximus type...)

Now, the actual quest.

What the FUCK just happened?

After dealing with Rell's psyche and releasing or destroying Harrow in the Void, or whatever we did, there's something odd in our personal quarters. When we go in, we suddenly find ourselves on Lua, where we find... the pod containing the actual Lotus? And then Ballas just... shows up, and takes her away? But, Ballas is one of the Orokin, the people that were annihilated by the Warframes in the Old War (I think) ... how long ago? A couple years? A couple thousand years? I think there were some lore snippets along the lines of, after the Orokin fell, the Grineer and Corpus took over the system. The Grineer used to be strong and competent, but cloning errors began to creep in generation after generation, so some time must have transpore since the Old War. We have extremely overgrown Orokin ruins on Deimos. And, Ballas's dialogue suggests he's been around for a bazillion years.

What happened? Why did Ballas wait for us to arrive to take the Lotus away? Did we have to lead him to her? We found magic voices from the Lotus asking to be freed... is this what she's always wanted? Or was that a memory from when she was like, imprisoned before her execution? The other lines do seem to be the latter, so. Who was it that Ballas turned into Umbra? Does it matter? Is it supposed to be someone we know? Why does Ballas have a long Bloodborne arm? Why is Ballas a blue Orokin and Isaah is just like a dude?

All rhetorical questions, as always, but this is what I'm asking for real. Am I forgetting something? Or am I meant to wonder what's going on, try to figure out the missing pieces? These cutscenes are as cinematic as anything in Final Fantasy, but the story is as Swiss-cheesed as any Soulsborne. Pieces are missing and I don't know what's going on, but it's being presented as if I already have the setup, as if I already know the context.

And, again. I love this style. It's completely fascinating and captivating. I'm not being critical, I know it sounds like I'm just complaining about being confused, but, that's not the case. I like being confused, because it's just the right level. There's plenty of story and characters, and enough lore and just... this vibe to suggest there's more. Ordis chirps every now and then, "Do you remember the Old War? Ordis seems to have... misplaced those memories." That's enough to make you go, whoa whoa whoa, what? ...and now whenever you play, you're looking for any tangential reference to this mysterious "Old War." Nora on the radio talks about Alad V's experiments, and now you know this mad scientist is out there something, up to something strange... It's not always a throughline narrative like FF, but you get these pieces to sort of color a vibe, so to speak. The world gradually fills in, and every now and then the dam breaks and it all spills forth, and you get all the water you could ever want, but... gosh, it's pretty messy sometimes.

Somehow, I've lucked into the ideal way to play this game, I think. At least, I'm having a lot of fun. I look up builds on websites, and they'll have powerful mods like Umbral Intensify. Umbral! I know about Primed, but Umbral!? Where do I get that! ...and then, suddenly, I have it, and it's like the stars have aligned and I've achieved enlightenment. At long last, this mythical relic has entered my hand! And, not gonna lie, it's kind of a profound moment. Now I know. Now I know where this important and mysterious item comes from!

There's so much to this game. Eidolon hunts, Kuva liches, sorties—these I've just recently unlocked, in terms of progression, and I could spend ages grinding them for the latest paths to strength. And there's more out there that I know very little or nothing about. I have "Arbitration" on my menu, but I can't select it until I clear the star chart, which includes a few things I can't do, like the Ropalolyst, and things I'm not up to yet, like Zariman, and things I can't even fathom a guess at, like the half-dozen remaining nodes on Deimos. I've vaguely heard about Icarnons? Something about a special mode for weapons? And recently I was watching a video explaining damage types, and he mentioned Archon shards? I have no idea what that is! But this man is shooting a bow that explodes ten times for 1,000,000 damage each hit... I can sometimes do a million damage with Baruuk's exalted weapon's charged heavy attack... And, there's probably more cool mods out there that are just super rare from an extremely specific source... I've heard of Adaptation and Growing Power, a couple other types of "Power," I think, so those must be from... who knows? C rotation in a rescue mission on Sedna? I know Vor shows up after round 1 survival on Mot in the Void, and he drops some unique mods, so maybe other places have some weird gimmick like that? I just don't know, and I probably won't without looking it up.

There is SO. MUCH. To this game. It's absurd. I've never played anything that comes close, even FFXIV, with as huge a game as it is, its content is much more samey—consistent tomestone systems, raid loot designs, dungeon length, whatnot. Nothing compares to Warframe, it's absolutely ridiculous.

And?

All this is free. Completely free. The only things you can only get with real cash money are cosmetic skins and syandanas and color palettes, I think. You can play the entire story and campaign for free, you can get every Warframe for free—getting enough storage to keep them all is a different story, though... Nora has some slots you can grind for sometimes but mostly you gotta pay—you can get all the Prime Warframes and weapons for free, there's no paid version of the season pass, no subscribers-only zones or Warframes or quests...

If I had found Warframe before FFXIV... I probably wouldn't have liked it. Original Warframe seemed... really different. I mean, current Warframe didn't even grab me until the third or fourth time around. But, I mean, what'm I playing now? I played Dawntrail, I logged in as soon as the servers went live and I sank deep into the story for a couple months. I took my time, exploring, grinding all my jobs first, and then as soon as the story was done—I went and did the post-game dungeons and raids :p But as soon as that was done, I just kinda... stopped playing. I haven't capped tomes once in Dawntrail; I used to do it religiously. I haven't even been getting all my Arcadion NM loot. I love FFXIV, it's my absolute baby, thinking about it, reminiscing about it, listening to it—my god, Soken's a genius—pondering the story, looking at fanart... but when it comes to pure gameplay? It's... dry. Combat is great—for an MMO. I find action RPGs like Warframe, Bloodborne, these kind of things a lot more fun, in terms of pure gameplay. And, look, every dungeon is formulaic, so many of the jobs play so similarly to others... Then you go to Warframe where, yes, missions are extremely formulaic, but you also have randomized maps, Stalker attacks, Eximus waves; and every Warframe plays so different from every other. Every weapon is different! Most games seem to just be a sliding scale of "This shoots fast but does less damage," "This shoots slow and does lots of damage," "This does lots of damage but is not accurate." Warframe has "This is an assault rifle," "This is an assault rifle. If you empty the magazine then it drains life from enemies nearby." "This is an assault rifle. It shoots missiles that explode," "This shoots grenades. You have to press this button to detonate them manually."

All right, folks. I'm tired of writing. To summarize: I love Warframe, this quest was great. Thanks for reading. Good night.

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #379

I... actually got to bed on time last night. And I woke feeling relatively refreshed, too. Been a while since last that happened.

I went to work this morning, though apparently, it was totally by accident. I wasn't actually scheduled today. It's just that, on the app on my phone, today is marked with a little black dot. Days that I work are also marked with little black dots. And just below the calendar, where it lists the times, it said 9am-1pm, and I assumed that it meant I needed to come in.

...I didn't read the date next to the listed hours. That date listed the 4th of this month. And I forgot that both days I work and days that are considered holidays are marked with black dots. So, in I went.

...And it was good. Because apparently, I was needed. Ka, the department manager, was very pleasantly surprised when I showed up. But she immediately set me to baking cookies:

Today was very quiet because it is New Year's Day. For some reason, in my country, it is typically celebrated by drinking obscene amounts of alcohol the night before. I'll never really understand the appeal of beginning New Year's Day with a hangover, but... to each their own, I suppose.

Since most everyone was either spending time with their families or riding out a headache from hell, hardly any customers were in the store today. With the extra time that came of not needing to tend to people very much, I spent a non-trivial amount of time stacking big heavy piles of metal baking trays and lifting heavy boxes in and out of the freezer. I was allowed to stay for 5 hours today! And when I was done, I picked up a few things for my house and went home; I'm hoping to have energy to cook tomorrow.

I seem to have crashed pretty hard when I got home, though; no doubt because I still need time to recover from a bunch of days of missed sleep, and no doubt because my body isn't used to that kind of lifting anymore. I didn't have the energy to do anything. So I didn't!! Instead I got sushi. And it was good!!

Then J came home from his job. We went to Eggcellent after that. We got the coconut panna cotta and the regular panna cotta. Y'know, to compare. For science!

J liked the regular panna cotta (on top) more. I liked the coconut one (the other one, with the toasty coconut bits!). I wonder which one you would have liked...

I also got a coconut jasmine green tea with extra cream cheese foam:

...I wish you could have been here to enjoy these with us.

Once everyone else was out of the shop, Ea and Ch surprised me with a giant bag full of various beads!!!

...I guess some of their family members are moving, and so they are closing their jewelry shop. They weren't interested in selling the remains, but they also didn't want the remains to go to waste, and so Ea and Ch told them that they knew someone (me!) who would make good use of them!

...Despite the dyspraxia, I'm still somehow good with my hands. In addition to being skilled at weaving trees, I am also skilled at making beaded jewelry. It has been a very, very long time since last I did that with any kind of regularity. I still remember how; I can weave fairly complicated things together with beads. My mind is already somewhat overwhelmed with ideas, ahaha!

...Well. Delayed onset muscle soreness is already settling in my upper body. I'm gonna take some ibuprofen and get to sleep early; I'm probably a little too tired to be thinking anything especially profound today, so I'm gonna end it here before I ramble.

I love you a whole lot, so please stay safe out there. Please take better care of your body than I've been taking care of mine.

I'll write again tomorrow.

Your friend, Lumine

[theladyofshalott1989]

Writer Interview Game

Thank you so much for tagging me @infernalrusalka! This was a lot of fun to reflect upon and type out. :)

No pressure tagging: @morelikeravenbore @ravenwind-75 @myokk @moongurl95 and honestly anyone else who wants to join in. I love reading about other writers' processes <3

When did you start writing?

Fanfic? When I was a young teen (roughly age 13/14). I wrote Star Wars (Anakin/Padme) fanfics on FanFiction.net.

Writing in general? When I was around 5. I used to "write books" (that is: take construction paper, bind it, and create little stories with pictures when I was bored at home, alone). Only child syndrome; am I right, or am I right? Haha.

Are there different themes or genres you enjoy reading than what you write?

I enjoy reading angst, but I don't (typically) write it. I also read a lot of published nonfiction for fun, but I hated writing essays in school. I was more of a creative writing gal.

Is there a writer you want to emulate or get compared to often?

You know, I've never actually thought about this, probably because I like to write for myself. I think it would be odd to be compared to another writer, even a famous one. I also read oodles, so it's difficult for me to choose an author I'd want to emulate. I suppose if I were forced at gunpoint to choose, I'd say John Steinbeck. He had a way with words; he turned phrases beautifully and his books have really stuck with me over the years, especially East of Eden.

Can you tell me a bit about your writing space?

My office, which my husband recently renovated for me. It's Hogwarts: Legacy themed, naturally. My husband is the best; he loves to encourage my "Sebastian and Damien delulu," my words, but he would definitely agree and approve. XD

What's your most effective way to muster up a muse?

Hmm, good question. I don't know if I have one actually, unless setting a writing schedule counts? I write every morning, rain or shine, for one hour before work. If I'm in the middle of writing a long-fic, I also write during my lunch break. I don't typically take days off either. So...I dunno? I do like to write while drinking coffee. Maybe that helps. Yes, let's say that.

Are there any recurring themes in your writing? Do they surprise you?

I tend to prefer writing morally gray characters that eventually have a redemption arc. Not sure what that says about me, but I don't mind it. Haha.

What is your reason for writing?

It's a type of therapy for me. It's the only time of the day that I get to myself. I work full-time and I'm a mom, and as thankful as I am for that, I have my own desires and passions outside of those two things that I don't want to lose. Writing is my way of keeping that part of myself alive.

Is there any specific comment or type of comment you find particularly motivating?

I love all types of comments, but I will worship the ground you walk upon if you're the kind of person who does reaction comments with quotes included. I try to comment this way too on other writers' fics to encourage more of this style of commenting because it's the best!

How do you want to be thought about by your readers?

If someone reads anything I've written and comes away with the sense of joy that I felt while writing it, I'd be absolutely thrilled.

What do you feel is your greatest strength as a writer?

I have a few that I'm proud of. Dialogue, particularly banter. Push-pull dynamics in relationships, especially in established ones. Morally gray characters. Foreshadowing and twists. I'll even it out by saying I'm not as confident in my description-writing abilities, which is partially my fault. I tend to skim descriptions in published books because they more often than not bore the hell out of me. LMAO. So...that's my bad. Interestingly, I really enjoy reading descriptions in fanfics, possibly because they tend to be more unique. Descriptions in published books are often very cookie-cutter and I feel like I've read them a million times before. Oh well.

How do you feel about your own writing?

Some days I love it, other days I think my writing is the worst, but I'm finding that's pretty normal when it comes to creators. We are very critical of our own work. I try to be kind to myself on days when I'm in a negative headspace because I know the feeling will pass. <3

[seriouslycromulent]

My rewatch of The John Larroquette Show (so far)

In my effort to keep my Larroquette obsession thriving, I've recently started a rewatch of The John Larroquette Show. Like Night Court (which I rewatched in 2022), I remember watching this show when it originally aired.

But unlike Night Court, my memory of most of the episodes is a bit fuzzy. I remember the main characters and their personalities just fine, but not so much what happens in terms of the storyline.

Regardless, I'm enjoying the rewatch, and I'm pleasantly surprised by how much the show holds up over time, how evergreen the topics are, and how strong the jokes are. Seriously. They are constantly telling jokes that I swear are as old as vaudeville, but they kill in terms of laughs from the audience and from me as well.

Example: In s2e8 "The Book of Rachel," Mayim Bialik guest stars as a young hippie-ish woman named Rachel who shows up in hopes of finding out if John Hemingway (JL's character) is her real dad. She's narrowed down the search to 3 men who knew her mom, who was living wild and free back in the '70s, around that time.

When John asks how her mother's doing, Rachel says, "She's doing pretty good. She's been clean for about 5 years now." John, a recovering alcoholic who's been sober for 1 year, says, "That's great! So no more drugs and booze, huh?" And Rachel says, "Oh no, there's still plenty of drugs and booze. She's just been bathing regularly for 5 years."

I'm not telling it very well in writing, but I swear to you, that joke is funny as hell, and Mayim and JL's delivery is perfection. Plus, it got a huge laugh from the audience, which speaks to its timeless nature.

Anyway, I just wanted to share a thought or two on the show so far. (I'm on episode 12 of Season 2, just in case anyone wants to know the context.)

Here are some random thoughts I've had so far:

Like Night Court, the show does a solid job of mixing comedy and drama. The first season is a bit more drama heavy because they dealt more with the recovery storyline, but I think it still worked and the whole concept is still pretty daring (i.e., revolving around the unglamorous lives of people who work in and around a bus station at night) even compared to today's sitcoms, which still tend to play it safe.

JL's hair in the first season is absurdly long. Or at least it gets to be absurdly long about halfway through the season. And it's not a good look. Not because he looks bad with long hair, but because it looks like it takes a lot of upkeep. And a man who is working 3rd shift at a bus station and lives in a halfway house/SRO building doesn't seem like he'd have a strict hair care regimen to make it appear perfectly tamed at all time. Seriously, at one point I had to ask out loud, "I wonder if they curl the ends with a curling iron or do they use rollers?"

This may be the first TV show I ever saw Chi McBride in. Despite seeing him on plenty of TV shows and films over the years, I never knew he had such a lovely singing voice. I'm glad they gave him a chance to share his singing talent. His version of "Danny Boy" in season 1 was very good.

The 2 corrupt police officers who blatantly flaunt their bias and awfulness are both funny and a great commentary on what was happening in America at the time (i.e., the Rodney King police beating, and the aftermath of the verdict was still very fresh in everyone's minds then). Sadly, it is an evergreen topic for the U.S., but I think it says a lot about the writers for TJLS that they attacked the subject so openly and didn't shy away of being critical of police or lampooning them. I don't think a modern American sitcom would approach the subject so brazenly and unapologetically today. JL has said in a number of interviews that the show was kind of ahead of its time. And I'm inclined to agree with him, at least in some areas.

It's so cool going back to watch old TV shows and catching actors who have now become bigger names in the business. I just watched an episode with Jane Lynch working as a mental health care professional. Of course, this was way before she found success on Glee and The 40-Year-Old Virgin.

Does JL manage to work in a reference to Samuel Beckett into everything he works on starting with this series? It's starting to function as his own career Easter egg at this point. I'm not complaining. Just wondering.

I know Don Reo created the show, but I suspect JL had a small amount of his life's adventures and details shape the John Hemingway character (like the Beckett references, his running commentary on anything that happened in the 1960s, his openness about being friends with anyone from any background, etc.). But the only way to truly know this is for JL to 1) tell us in Q&As or interviews, or 2) write an autobiography already, dammit!

In s2e1 "Changes," JL sits down in a chair by swinging his leg over the back of it, and I immediately thought of the Riker Maneuver. I know JL did it before Jonathan Frakes on TNG, but it will always be the Riker Maneuver to me.

Another way the show was ahead of its time was in its portrayal of sex workers and trans people. Most of the time, it's played for comedy on the show (I mean, it is a sitcom after all), but there's a very real attempt to share stories of Carly, Teddi and Pat that are humanizing. Teddi and Pat are trans sex workers, but they are accepted by most (not the male cop) and aren't just the butt of jokes. They even get included in simple things like group poker games and asked to watch the lunch counter when Dexter runs off to do something or other. That might seem like not a big deal, but at that time (the mid-90s), most inclusion of hookers and trans folks on TV usually involved heavy drama like trying to save them from their lives or begrudgingly acknowledging that they were a part of society with disdain and ridicule. And the overall acceptance of Carly as a friend and possible love interest without trying to save her or judge her was also a bit ahead of its time. And when there were moments of judgment, they were faced head on and challenged.

[catboybiologist]

I maaaaay have spent most of my evening scrolling your dash. But, for my defense, you post good, Ma'am. Also I need someone to tell you your vocal tries are impressive. I tried to stay focused but your voice was so soft, that was lulling.

Anyway, uh, yeah. Question. I was here for a question.

I've just started my PhD, do you have any advice to handle the incoming workload and the pressure?

Aaaaww thank you <3 I might post more voice clips to practice in the future!

As for the question- a PhD experience is highly, highly variable. My advice is going to be strongly based on my own experiences, and my own program. It's probably more applicable if you're in a wet lab science, but still, take it with a grain of salt.

A big thing to realize about a PhD is that it isn't necessarily the sheer quantity of work you'll be doing, but how different the pace and the kind of work you do is from undergrad or a more typical job. Compared to undergrad, your classes will be far less important to nonexistent. Your time will mostly be split between research/thesis related projects, and teaching, depending on the teaching workload.

Your experiences with your research are going to vary a lot, but in general, your PI/research advisor basically determines everything. The #1, big, massive, blinking, do-not-avoid piece of advice I will give about grad school is: pick your research advisor carefully. Do NOT prioritize the exact, nitpicky subfield you want to work in. Your PhD doesn't determine the direction of the rest of your career. Instead, you HAVE to consider whether this is a person you can work for/with for the next 5-7 years. Do you want a more "hands on" person that will set short term goals, or someone that will leave you alone and just check in infrequently to help with long term goals? Do you communicate well with them? What's the word in the department about their mentorship style long term? Avoid people who take pride in trying to "challenge" you, invariably they're shitheads preying on people with more work ethic than self worth (may or may not be based on personal experience lol).

You might be past this point, depending on how your program works- for me, I had a year of rotations before settling in lab permanently. Unless you're a direct admit with an advisor you already know, I would basically consider this or a similar system to be a requirement of a program.

Beyond that, even if you end up in a more "hands on" environment, independence is key. Of course you should collaborate and ask people to help you, but in both a motivation and a practical sense, you should be able to work on your own and take initiative. You need to interpret your own findings and set your own direction for where they're going to go. You need to analyze whether that's in your capability and how you're going to get it done. My personal little advice is to always have at least one thing going on that you can do with zero to minimal input from anyone- for me, this takes the form of computational bioinformatics work that doesn't require any lab resources and most other people in my lab don't have the toolkit to do. Main projects or side projects like this allow you to get *something* done, even if you're stuck in a rut otherwise.

But then there's the flip side to that- you're almost always going to be your own worst critic. Pace yourself. You'll always feel like you're not getting enough done, and you'll fight that feeling constantly. Hell, writing this is like me telling on myself and leaving my own reminder for myself. Balance this with your ability to work independently. Be deliberate about your recreation time and keep yourself to it as well.

The PI selection is the only one that's like, a super strong piece of advice here. But I hope the rest was at least a bit useful!

[thedreadvampy]

I love your bleach paint shirts they are amazing and you look incredible 🌠

Would you by any chance have any pointers on how to get started with that for someone who'd love to do stuff with bleach but has zero idea how it works nor much artistic talent/skills?

Honestly the reason I'm so into bleach painting lately is that I tried it last year and discovered it is like. CRAZY easy to do. all you need is regular household bleach, an area that it's ok to get bleach on, and a paintbrush. other stuff that's useful is electrical tape and card (for masking/stencilling) and a good spray bottle/mister. Recycling the kind of spray bottles cleaning products come in will give you a very blotchy/streaky effect which looks cool but will probably not stencil super well in my experience - I use a hairdressing mist bottle for stencils that gives a really even coverage.

As a step by step, my process looks like:

Put on light coloured clothes/clothes I don't care about, make sure soft furnishings are well out of the way, and cover any fabric (I have lino floors so usually just move the rug and work directly onto the floor)

Get the clothing I want to work on and put some thick cardboard inside it to hold it flat and make sure I don't bleach through onto the back

Draw out a design in however much detail is useful to you. I use a white pencil so it shows up well - dressmakers chalk would probably also be a good shout.

Cut any stencils I want to use (card, cartridge paper or tracing paper all work but bleach will just soak through regular paper. I have also had solid results cutting shapes directly out of gaffer tape) and stick them on with double sided tape.

Pour some bleach into a jar to work with, put bleach in the mister. Make sure you have some tissue or paper towel on hand bc bleach does go everywhere.

Paint with the bleach! I just use regular nylon paintbrushes for this. You should see the line developing almost straight away, but it might take a while depending on the fabric - sometimes you have to paint a bit blind while the bleach takes a while to work. Resist the urge to paint over it again until you've given it plenty of time!

Rinse it when you think it's developed enough! As soon as I'm done, I take the shirt to the bathroom, take the cardboard out, hang it up in the shower and just fire water at it. Once the water runs clearish, I rinse it properly in the sink. I do the shower step to make sure I've taken off a decent amount of the surface bleach before I submerge it cause I worry about the bleach spreading, but it may not be a necessary step. The water will probably run rust-red or grey for a while - that's what you want, that's the dye washing out of the bleached fabric.

I usually hang it on the bath for a tiny bit to drain off and do any last bits of developing, then stick it in the washing machine on a rinse/spin cycle.

Once it's dry you did it! New t-shirt!

Strongly recommend buying a good few plain black t-shirts to practise on and try out techniques with ☺️ I may go to fast fashion hell for this but I have a box of like 5 black shirts in my wardrobe that I replenish regularly for when I Get The Urge - I get ones that are like £3 from supermarkets and Primark/H&M and hoard them 😅

More details under the cut:

Some stuff about the properties of bleach:

Compared to pretty much any paint, bleach is SUPER viscous. Putting a brush in and pulling it out will stretch out a long string of bleach, and you have to reload the brush a LOT because it'll really only do one brush stroke because bleach likes to stick together

There's a temptation, always, to water it down to make it lighter or easier to work with. DON'T DO THIS (except if it won't come out of a spray bottle without it, and then water it down SUPER sparingly). Reducing the concentration of the bleach will extremely suddenly take it from "will give you a clear bright line" to "the fabric is very slightly paler if you squint in the right light"

The wetter the fabric gets, the more all the bleach will spread. So the more layers of bleach you put on the surface, the less crisp and more glowy the mark gets. In particular, cause spraying the fabric gets it fairly wet, I would always advise doing most spraying and stenciling last if you want to mix painting and stenciling.

Bleach obviously develops over time - depending on the fabric and the concentration you should get a fairly clear idea of how it's going to look after 5 minutes or so, but it will keep developing for a while and it looks a bit darker when it's wet, so you don't 100% know how it'll turn out until it's washed and dry.

There's two ways to moderate tone in bleach painting:

How much bleach you put on the surface (which you can control either by how much bleach is on the brush, or by layering up several rounds of bleach...remembering that the more you layer it, the blurrier it gets)

How long it sits (there's an upper limit to this - if it's been 10 or 15 minutes and it's still not as bright as you want you probably need to go over it again)

Because of this, you always want to start with the stuff you want to be brightest - so, on the ACAB design I started with the highlights on the lettering and the pig, the white squares on his hat, and his white fangs. Then I did the outlines, then worked down from brown to black.

Design notes:

You can't rely on getting crisp edges when you layer bleach on bleach, so I think it helps to leave some empty space around key details like lettering (like a black outline). One thing I've been experimenting with is masking areas off with cut out electrical tape or gently stuck-down card stencils that cover slightly more area than the design so I can work on a background without making everything a blurry mess

It's also very hard to rely on how dark or light an area will come out, so if you try to do bright white against dark brown, you might end up with a whole area of bright white. So again, outlines and empty space are your friends.

Bleach does spread and it is heavily affected by the weave of the fabric, so don't rely on getting tiny clear detail

Cool stuff bleach can do:

Spraying from a mister, spraying from a spray bottle, and just splashing/dribbling/throwing bleach directly onto the surface all give really different and fun effects and it's really nice to layer those up imo

Because of how viscous bleach is, you often leave drops and trails of bleach unexpectedly when you move your brush. this is a feature not a bug it looks Cool And Punk and you can use it to add interest

Different fabrics go different colours. Some go bright white, some go orangey/yellow - if you're really lucky, I've seen some t-shirts that go a really reddish orange and you get some cool bloody effects like that. As far as I can tell, fabrics with a higher cotton content are likely to go brighter (my denim jacket has gone almost bone white under concentrated bleach whereas most cotton mix t-shirts I've done go a fairly bright yellow/orange) while ones with a higher synthetic content may bleach a bit darker/greyer/murkier.

One other note is that bleach does damage the fabric's integrity a tiny bit. Not much, but if when you rinse it the back side of the fabric is more or less as bright as the front, you might want to treat the shirt with a little more care than otherwise - it's not a huge issue, but a few of the shirts that my partner made a few years back have started to develop holes in areas where there's been particularly heavy bleach.

[bithegai]

Hey this might be stupid or not helpful but idk felt like saying it

I've followed ya for a long while, ya were one of the first blogs I followed like what? 3ish years ago and am in shambles as well cause of. Well. All that. And just wanted to say that if ya will leave, I'd suggest not deleting anything permanently. I can't say much specificness cause I can't remember that time well but I do remember yr blog was always nice to check, wish I would've interacted more when stuff was good. Idk. Like at the end do whatever n all but I've liked the stuff ya put here and idk. It's a nice place. English isn't helping me much right now but I just wanted to say that I really enjoyed following ya, I didn't really know ya but you were cool. Wish you the best during these difficult times and just. Thanks for everything

Aw thank you.... that's very kind of you to say ❤️ and reassuring considering the thousands of blogs that come and go. I always just used this as kind of a rant blog for all HC stuff so it's v sweet hearing at least someone else got some joy out of it too lol. Feels like it's just another speck in the abyss, so genuinely it's very sweet that you remember it anon. Even crazier that you've been here for all these years too.... Would've been awesome having another friend to enjoy the wild ups and downs with

And honestly I'm not final on what I'm gonna do, just very.... lost like you. It just feels so weird right now cause like, pretty much my existence here is bc of Stress? (And yes, even though those involved have said all the issues were only with the other person 1. she still left and 2. the vast majority of her content involved him) Like I started this blog and made a twitch account for her. I learned how to archive vods bc of her. My first HC fanart is of her. The first "big" post I made was a list of recommendations for Stress episodes. And even though I talked abt her less recently compared to back then, personally she was such a big part of my enjoyment here that now I'm just ......?

Like I haven't posted about this, just bc I agree the focus should stay on those hurt by his actions and amplifying their stories. But god there was so much more I wanted to see from Stress. I was looking forward to the completed "Sentimental Stress" base. Possibly a revival of the Allium Alliance, and maybe even one day a 5/5 hermit gals collab. But it's never happening now. And honestly? I think I could've been fine, moved on. But it's the fact that there's nothing left to look back on either that hurts me the most.

In the past, when something grim happened, I would just play an old HC episode or a funny vod to cheer up. But all those videos I turned to, always feature either one or both of them. Not to be a stereotypical stan, but they were rlly my safe haven on those dark and dreary days. ......and now here we are. Not only is there little to look forward to, but it feels there's nothing left behind either. Cause tbcfh? My favorite part about HC is the history, seeing how long these friendships took to develop and how much stronger they are for it. So I loved those older, cringy series like Hunt the hermit or Foolcraft. And ofc I also downloaded a bunch of vods to watch back. Like the first big vault after co-op crystals were introduced, or that one 2021 twitch rivals with the two and False and Impulse. Hell I even have Ren's old MC dungeons vod of the three of them from when the game first released. But what's the point now? Everything I used to look forward to now leaves me sick, so what is there to turn to?

Honestly tho you're right anon. For preservation's sake I'll keep everything here even if I do end up going. With tumblr how it is, things get a lot more difficult to reach once someone deactivates. And I forgot I have things that False and Cleo (for the short time they were here) reblogged that I'd like to save. But we'll see. I hope you've been doing alright with this too anon. I mean hey, we've stuck around here for over 3 years now. All this time with the hermits has taught us that the best thing we can do: is to listen and support each other to build a brighter, kinder tomorrow

[anemcia]

//I'm actually thrilled I've dedicated more time to tumblr again, it's given me a lot of time to chew over Honeydew's personality, motivations, and who she is from a clearer perspective. Or maybe she's evolving with time, but for the better compared to how she initially started 5 years ago. Hell, she's VERY different from how she began.

//To get to the point: I've decided she's no longer a massive simp for Cell-- or more accurately, will NOT comply with ideas and situations that fully compromise the safety of Earth. Now, her feelings romantically and physically? Downright pathetic levels of simpery.

"Kill a guy or a group? Sure, if I have no strings attached to them, guess it's what I'll do to help you. Destroy Earth? Nah, I live here dude. Plus I love my [friend name(s)], so no. Not uh. Not gonna do it."

//I know she has her beef with people who've done her dirty, but I believe she'll never truly lose her humanity. As my husband said earlier today, "You don't want to recreate a Harley Quinn type of character." AND FOLKS? I FELT THAT.

//At some point, I think I got way, way too close to that archetype with Honey. For her to be the kind of person who would just drop-kick millions of innocents for some Cicada snu-snu is not what I had in mind! But when it came to giving her reasons to stick around despite everything, I pigeonholed her into that role unintentionally. It felt cringe, and it was cringe, for a long time. Now that I'm re-examining her, she's still flawed, but with a healthier undertone by comparison.

//She has her reasons for staying by Cell's side, mostly to see that her own ambitions and goals are reached with his guidance. She loves him, but she won't force herself to do anything she knows is a step too far. Honeydew almost serves as the occasional angel on Cell's shoulder, looking to persuade him to make better use of his aggression instead of doing the unthinkable (Namely, the mass destruction of their home planet)

//Alternatively, will play the devil and insist he move to another planet and do CELL GAMES 2!!!!! As long as it's not Earth? She could let the behavior slide. She'll always be morally grey to that extent, but no doubt leaning towards being a 'hero'. Especially leaning into this idea with Plumia, as the Tanuki creatures are Earth's defenders. Honeydew has been chosen to defend against threats to Earth, and I guess that means making sure Cell stays in 'check' to some degree while she also faces demonic threats and other forces that threaten their home.

//It's building a far more interesting dynamic as the pieces come together! I don't think she'll ever impose herself on Cell too harshly (unless she isn't given that option anymore), but she'll negotiate far more reasonable ways to keep him entertained the way he wants to.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 05/02/2024

Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier

Season 5 Featured on: Rips From Around The Way 7 (Hidden Track)

Ripped by DonnieTheGuy Visuals by moralem, Blookerstein, PsychLantern, Myeauxyoozi

Requested by crickep! (Discord)

Yknow, for as much as I like to go on and on about Season 2 being my favorite period of the channel's life - it may honestly just be due to my own personal investment being at its highest at that point. Its a herculean, damn near impossible task nowadays to actually try and critically evaluate a season of SiIvaGunner in retrospect, and most of what I go off of obviously just comes from my own experiences and memories. It goes to reason, then, that Season 5 is my least favorite season of the channel not necessarily due to any fault of its own, but just due to my own personal investment in the channel being rather low at the time. I say that, because with every rip I cover from the Season - now including Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier - I'm baffled as to why I'd ever consider the season anything less than peak.

When I have that discussion with other people (or just with the voices in my head), the reasons tend to primarily boil down to a lack of lore developments made during the year. Yet as I talked about way back in Knowledge of the Depths, even that feels like doing the Season a disservice, given just how enjoyable and, in a way, lore-crucial the audio dramas made during Season 4 Episode 2 and Season 5 wound up becoming. Which again makes me point toward my own lack of attentiveness toward the Season as the one to blame: because how else could I have missed out on how genuinely engaging and interesting the lore regarding Lady, Yankin', Masked Wolf and Astronaut in the Ocean was? And as the cherry on top - how could I have missed just how perfect of an ending to it all Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier wound up being?

I've dissected and talked about Masked Wolf before in Aquarium in the Ocean and Snow halocean, as the figment who best fits the role of a true anti-hero within SiIvaGunner - an agent of chaos whose rips only occasionally bother to actually sound good, yet one we wound up loving despite (or because of!) it all. Yet as Season 5 began to truly ramp up, his role seemed to change from agent of chaos to necessary evil - as the only remaining figment capable of stopping the reign of hell that Lady's "Yankover" was subjecting us all to. No doubt SiIva has had its contentious, long-lasting takeovers before (Harlem Shakeover and Totally Shaaking Out Right Now, anyone?), yet nothing truly compared to the neverending downpour of hellfire cast upon us by one particularly crass rapper singing about her genitalia. And for once, it seemed as if the SiIvaGunner team agreed - Lady became, for all intents and purposes, the actual villain of Season 5, with her figment form reimagined as a full-on demon in need of imprisonment. And small nuggets of lore were being handed out week by week (nuggets that I, again, unfortunately glazed over back in the day), Lady's defeat wound up happening at the hands of HoBART, everyone's favorite mixer from the King for Another Day Tournament. Yet to me, Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier still sits at the most pure, befitting end to her reign - a battle between the Season's fallen angel and its lawless demon, set to the tune of a game whose entire hype cycle practically enveloped Season 5 in its entirety.

Back in Satinpanties Symphony, I mused over how Friday Night Funkin became a mainstay feature on SiIvaGunner almost overnight, and how it feels as if the two projects share a lot of DNA that make them a perfect fit for one another, in how they handle the idea of legacy. What better game, then, could there be to depict the encounter between these two legends that defined the season, than with the game that defined the year - coincidentally, one entirely focused on duels between rappers. That's not to imply that Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier isn't an absolute banger on its own - the melodic core of Ugh, paired with the implementation of both Astronaut in the Ocean and Yankin's backings into the back-and-fourth, creates a fantastic re-imagining of the song that's both endlessly relistenable and incredibly charming with the custom visuals. Yet its the same point I made in Take You To The Desert - with all that context in mind of all that led up to this battle, the knowledge of how much the community suffered under the thumb of both rappers yet came to understand one for his harmless-if-strange tendencies yet came to loathe the other...Epic Rap Battles of History: Funny vs. Funnier becomes something genuinely legendary. Paired with so many small flourishes added on top, such as the original track's "Ugh" sample being replaced with Masked Wolf's opening "Astro", the reference to Lady's attempted Thanksgiving resurrection ritual in Twerkey (seriously), down to Lady being positioned as the player character to truly sell home how dominant she was during her reign...It feels like yet another one of those, for lack of another word, Perfect, rips.

The cherry on top of it all though is, of course, the ending. Despite the seemingly even back-and-forth in the battle, Lady is suddenly dragged back into the pits of hell, as Masked Wolf leaves her with his parting words.

I believe in G-O-D, don't believe in T-H-O-T.

[lesvegas]

ritchie’s🎃💀 ABCs of Horror Movie Marathon!! 💀🎃

Horror movie challenge prompted by @quintsmachete

Day Five - E is for Emesis Blue (2023)

I haven't been 'in' the TF2 fandom in years and only have one or two mutuals left from those days, so while I've heard the title in passing, I wasn't even really sure what this was until I saw it listed on a horror movie wiki. Turns out what I thought might've been a popular fic was actually a feature-length horror SFM-- how could I NOT watch it?

The first thing I need to address is that I've seen very few 'serious' videos animated in SFM in my time; a solid 98% of them have been silly as hell, so it took my brain at least ten minutes to adjust to the fact that this is Not a funny joke video. The striking imagery within the first minute or so definitely helped, but it was still a slightly awkward phase that may have hampered the beginning for me.

The voice acting also made for a weird adjusting period. This is entirely a skill issue on my part but it took me a while to get used to the voices for each of the characters as well, ESPECIALLY the Spy's. In fact, at first I thought the Spy and Heavy sounded kinda bad, but they sorta grew on me in the end.

Okay, just one more 'negative' thing before I get to the praise: this movie was loaded with references I didn't understand, but I could *tell* they were meant to be references, so there were moments here and there where I felt like I was missing out. I caught the Dumb and Dumber reference, but my partner pointed out several The Shining references that I only caught two of (I haven't seen The Shining). I feel like I'm gonna have to come back to this movie after watching at least a few others to Get It, but by then I'm not sure if that will really enhance the viewing experience or cheapen it. Only time will tell.

Honestly, I think I'm gonna have to give this a rewatch again regardless, because I want to experience it again but also because I feel like there's still a lot I don't understand. I don't mean that in a negative way at all; it gives me the same feeling I got when I saw Akira, Fight Club, and The Godfather. Like there's too much to digest in one sitting and I need to see it all again to really take it in and appreciate it. I don't know how else to describe it but I promise I only feel this way with movies I really like.

I don't know much about animation or SFM as a software, but if the comments are anything to go by, this movie must have been an absolute nightmare to make, so it gets an extra star for sheer effort alone. What I do know is that this movie is as beautiful as an SFM production can get; the shot composition, lighting and colours are all incredible throughout the entire film, the animation may be the smoothest I've seen from SFM but it's been a while since I've seen a 'serious' one so I don't have much to compare it to. Some of the models were a little inconsistent in style but there's only so many TF2 models to work with, so it's hard to knock it for that.

I've read fics and comics with their own horror spin on the concept of respawn and other game mechanics before, but I think Emesis Blue easily makes the most of it. This really is a solid psychological horror with some brutal and tense scenes, none of which linger for too long. I only felt it begin to drag about an hour in. Overall I was entertained the entire time and can't wait to give this one a rewatch after I see The Shining.

I'm giving this Movie four Regional Indicator Symbol Letter M's out of 5 🇲 🇲 🇲 🇲 🗌

[shearmouth]

Just a little rant bc it's been bothering me for days and I figure there's some people on this hellsite who know exactly what I'm talking about.

I have h-EDS. I'm lucky– it's mild to moderate compared to what some zebras deal with. I can work, I can do most of the things I enjoy, even though I pay for them in extra pain every time. I don't consider myself disabled. I have a connective tissue disorder that leaves me in low-level pain pretty much all the time, and restful nights of sleep are rare because of sleep apnea and TMJ strain so bad I've broken teeth and sprained my jaw in the night, and generally my noodle ligaments make life hell, but I have been able to retain pretty much all of my function. For that I am intensely grateful, and I try not to be frozen with terror at what the future may hold.

I work a highly physical job. It keeps me strong but it's hard on the body, and I'm working on transitioning to a more balanced work life. I'm a stablehand at a high-end horse boarding facility. Some of the horses there are worth half a mil on the hoof. The board bill per month for the nicer barn is more than double my rent. People there own tack that's worth more than I make in a year.

I try not to be bitter, but as someone who works 2.5 jobs and often does 5 hour walking tours on one of those jobs after working 10 hours in the roaring southern summer heat on the other, and someone who's longed for her own horse and financial security her entire life, it gets to me sometimes. When these women roll up in their BMWs and their $300 Free Ride britches like it's chump change to them, and I'm starting to limp because I've walked 10 miles already today and lifted 400lbs worth of shit as I clean up after their horses for $17.15 an hour.

One of those women commented on my knee the other day. When I woke up, it hurt. I thrash in my sleep a lot so I probably pranged it. I taped it because it hurt.

She asked how I hurt it. I waved it off and said "Oh, I have a joint disorder" like I always do in surface-level interactions because I find it's the simplest way to sum up the most obvious symptoms of h-EDS.

That's all I said. In return, she told me flippntly, "Oh, you have a lot of joints so you have a lot to look forward to. Welcome to life. You're active, at least, so that will help."

I walked away. I had work to do, unlike her, and if I said what I wanted to, I'd get a word from my higher-ups, though they would probably agree with me. One of the drawbacks of charging 2k a month in board–we have to kiss ass to these people often.

I walked away. She walked back to her pair of $50,000 imported warmbloods, oblivious to how I told her to fuck herself under my breath, because how dare she. How dare she tell me "welcome to life" like she had any fucking clue about mine. That I lose more than half my paycheck to rent and medical copays. That I subluxated my shoulder the worst I ever have when I reached into my locker a few months ago. That I can't afford the kind of treatment that would significantly reduce my daily pain because I don't have the kind of money she does. That I grapple all the time with what life may look like when I'm 30, 40, 50– how I may have deteriorated by then, how I may have to heavily modify the things I love, if not lose them entirely, to this disorder I was born with.

Yet here I am, working 10 hours in 90 degree southern heat on a taped-up knee, because it's how I survive. Because it's how I keep a roof over my head. I don't know her life either–maybe there was a time when she had to struggle too. But she sure as shit isn't now, not in the way I do, and in that moment I viscerally hated her for trivializing my pain like that. My stark reality– that every day, on some level, is a fight. That it could get worse, and it probably will, and I'll need to adjust again and again and again and pray that I don't lose what I love. And on some level I still hate her for it.

So fuck her and fuck all of them– the people who tell you "welcome to life." That you're too young to have a bad back or who tell you to "just stop doing that" when you tell them that "that" hurts. Who try to wave it off like it's a minor inconvenience, like the throbbing at the base of my skull and behind my eyes that makes me curl up and cry is no more worthy of attention than a parking ticket.

It's not trivial. It's not inconvenient. It's just "just life." It's my life, and it contains battles won and lost that she had no concept of, and lacked the mental flexibility to even imagine.

So fuck her. Fuck all of them.

[torialefay]

I reblogged my topic I was going to send here in case you didn't want to continue answering and furthering the concept about how lack of experience can affect the desirability of a person in sexual/romantic.

I'm 26, virgin, the last time I even kissed a guy was 5 years ago, never been in a long-term relationship and even though it is a HUGE insecurity of mine, I'm open about it on here because I have received a lot comments like-

'You're a virgin? your smut is so good and accurate, I thought you'd have loads of experience'

Which I love those comments, froth over them but I'm honest about my inexperience so ppl know I have no idea what the hell I'm writing about half the time.

But as a cis female, I do understand that it's more 'acceptable' for a woman to be 26 and have a lack of experience vs men to be 26 and have a lack of experience.

It's hard both ways- don't get me wrong because I know plenty of guys who are like...

'I don't want to be with someone who's a virgin because it's too much pressure to be someone's first'

Which for starters, how mediocre and effortless is your performance in the bedroom that you think it's 'too much pressure' to give someone a good time?

And secondly, I would argue and say there's less pressure because there's nothing for us to compare it too??

But as a female, I think we do get more sympathy about being a late-bloomer because 'she's a romantic, she's waiting until marriage, sex is more intimate for her etc etc'.

Whereas most the time when a guy is inexperienced, ppl are going to be like 'why? You're a guy, just go fuck whoever- unless you're a creep or incel wtf?'

But it's double edged because most ppl don't want to be with someone who's inexperienced but how are we meant to gain experience?

And then there's the whole other topic of a women being sexually rejected by a man and the stigma surrounding that-

Women are tend to be told that men will take all offers of sex and has someone who has been sexually rejected (more than once) by guys- I can safely say it's a level of humiliation that you don't find anywhere else.

In summary, as a demisexual 26 year old inexperienced female, pls give us a chance because most of us are eager and willing to learn and are just excited about fkn getting chosen by someone in all honesty.

i think it's okay to post about it as long as it's informational and isn't coming for anyone 😭😂 and i think this is an important topic because there definitely are people on this platform who also haven't had sex before & i think it's good for them to know that it's actually pretty normal. i have friends who haven't slept with anyone, and they're in their mid-twenties as well.

i also have friends who have liked & disliked that they were "virgins"... sometimes i struggle with the word bc i think it can have a negative or weird connotation sometimes, but i'm gonna use it for now anyways. there are some people who like the feeling of knowing they're gonna be the first dick inside of you/first person to do something to you (as if you've never used a toy or fingers before but whatever), and there are definitely people who don't give af about you & assume you want your first experience to be with someone more "special" than them. there's a wide range of responses to someone who openly says that they are a virgin.

i don't think most realize just how many people there are around our age who actually haven't slept with anyone... because they simply don't talk about it or have been made to feel weird or ashamed. my heart breaks over that sometimes bc some people simply want it out of curiosity, but others only want it to say they've done it or to not feel "weird" about themselves... or feeling "different" i guess.

i do think i've met more fem people who need an emotional connection before experiencing sexual attraction to a person... but i think there are plenty of masc people who feel this way as well, but it's been pushed on them that they SHOULD have the urge to fuck. and here's the same: it is so fucking hard & backwards to get into a relationship these days. i've read some studies that have projected that only about 60% of people in our age range & below will end up in relationships and be with that person long term/to the point of marriage... people have a dating problem & a commitment problem and that makes it a lot harder for some people to have sex or even want to have sex. even for me, i've only slept with people i've been in relationships with... but at this point in society, i genuinely don't know if i'll ever be in a meaningful relationship again sooooo ig you know what that means 🥲

point blank, there are tons of people out there, fem and masc, who haven't had sex. most of them just don't talk about it. and i don't think it's anything that anyone should be shamed for- regardless of the gender they identify as. plus, there will be plenty of people who are great at sex their first time, and plenty who aren't. some potential partners don't want to risk it as not being "great" their first time & that could contribute to saying no. but i would bet that there are plenty of people out there who would be just fine with it.

i hope you never have to feel alone in this. if people don't wanna fuck, that's not always on you. and please never feel like you have to be "chosen" bc a lot of these guys & gals choose sucky people for reasons we don't really know other than they think they'll insure a good time. i love youuuuu ❤️❤️❤️❤️

[horizon-verizon]

Do we have confirmation that Rhaenys and Corlys are still getting along for 20 years?I've seen their fans think that the age difference is less now because of the cast and it's one of the things I complain about on the show.

Rhaenys, Corlys and Daemon literally don't age in...30-35 years?Harwin and Criston also look the same, should I perceive that they are closer to Rhaenyra's age or Daemon's? What the hell is Otto's age? Was it still the hand of Jahaerys before Viserys?Did Aemma and Viserys still get married as early teenagers? Because none of them seem to be in their early 20's during the GC.

Alicent and Rhaenyra change to show that they are "adults", I can't even pretend to understand the disaster that is the age difference of the actors who play their children, if they are like 5 years apart, why do those from Alicent look like adults? Rhaenyra certainly looks like Jace and Luke's mother, Alicent could play sister to her children. And even though I love the actors and they did a fantastic job, I don't understand why Laenor and Laena needed three actors to play them and by god I can't begin to guess what the age difference is between them and Rhaenyra

Fans complaining about the age difference could understand, there's certainly an eww factor that can occur when one sees that on screen (I have a friend who was never able to see the time traveler's wife because of the scenes in which he is an adult and she is a child) It's about playing with the chase, but the way that perception is represented in HotD is certainly strange and superfluous,I can't take seriously people who clutch their pearls when not even the producers seem to know what age we're seeing on screen and whether or not it's problematic.

Anon responds to this post.

I didn't feel too bad abt Daemon's aging, bc his hair was shaping his face and telling the stages of his mind as the years went by. Plus the charisma was a good deflector. For me.

Aemma's/younger Rhaenys' casting were issues bc just as young Alicent's age was a clear element to what story the show!writers were writing, it's very important that Aemma/Rhaenys are shown to have been preteens/teens when they married. Espe when bk!alicent was not either of these two's ages ehn they married!

Why? HotD uses Aemma's storyline for Alicent in that Aemma was giving birth too young (form at least 13) and arranged to be married to 16-yr old Viserys at 11. She is the one who's put through terribel reproductive abuse from a terribly young age. Her mother, Daella, married young and died in childbirth the very first time she fell pregnant with Aemma. This provides even more context for how Rhaaenyra has been a victim in this story, bc the fear HotD presents in Rhaenyra of childbirth becomes presents itself, comparatively, as more diluted. Aemma at the 1st episode beside Viserys looks more appropriate in age, so while she is being used for reproductive labor, she also presents as less...mistreated without that knowledge of being too young. Which a lot of tg fans have "forgotten" in their assessments that Alicent "deserves" to have her sosns be heirs bc she was too young in marrying Viserys & was abused by him (something to "make up" for suffering"mindset)...okay, Aemma was also young, spent most of her life pregnant and losing one child after another until she finally dies with Baelon. In this line of thinking, does Aemma not "deserve" to hae her child on the throne, as she "tried" her damndest to "give" Viserys an heir?! And HotD helps this with the whole Alicent taking bk!Rhaenyra's dress moment, posing as if Alicent had anything really to complain about concerning Rhaenyra's actions. Rhaenys chooses 37 yr old Corlys at 16...which means they've been "talking" for before then, we don't know how long but it spells not-good.

In a perfect world, we'd have three separate actors for all of these characters...or at least most. I'd choose: Rhaenyra, Daemon, Viserys, Rhaenys, Laena.

For two actors: Laenor, Aemma, Corlys. (I don't include the black kids [dragon twins, V boys], they were great).

But as it is, I wasn't too weirded out by Daemon, Corlys, Laena, Laenor's castings in terms of age bc of D's hair and the suspension of disbelief that I kinda always employ. because this is also a trend in the industry where you have actors who do not look like their orig counterparts' ages. There were obviously exceptions.

Is it weird that I never had an issue with Aemond? I thought he looked fine enough as a son to Alicent. Aegon, too? I thought Olivia was in her early to mid 30s. 🤷🏽‍♂️ I really was shocked to learn otherwise.