#343 is dead!!!

[lizard-x]

CACKLE CACKLE CACKLE

Halo is no longer under 343 and is noe under Halo Studios and I am both excited and extremely worried about this, lets see how this'll play out, but Mark IV armor looks amazing on unreal engine

[retrogamer2099]

Retro_G is back with a sample music from Halo Infinite. With the new season's pass this is called "Survive the Undead". Happy Haloween! Like comment and Subscribe! THX.

[crusaderguy]

PLEASE JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP!!! THAT'S ALL I'M FUCKING ASKING!!! JUST SHUT UP!!! I get it and I don't care if it's dead or not, just let me enjoy the shooty shooty bang bang game with the green tank man, and come up with an original comment too whenever you see something that's even slightly bad for Halo.

[voxslays]

DUNGGEULGE DUNGGEULGE

TLDR >>> During mingle, player 001 saves your life more than once. WARNINGS >>> Death/Murder (it is squid games after all.)

It was the third day of the horrorifying reality you were now living. At first, it didn’t seem so bad. Play a couple children’s games and have the possibility of winning 45.6 billion? You thought it would be easy. You thought the man you knew as player 456 was crazy. What did he mean you would die?

But you quickly started to believe him when people started getting killed during a ‘friendly’ game of red light, green light. The evening before the second game you had found a group, consisting of player 456–who you now know to be Gi-hun, Jung Bae, Dae-ho, Jun-Hee and player 001, or Young-il.

You and player 001 had the strongest connection of the group, even though the age gap between you was over a decade and half. He was a married man, and you a young American. Who could be a better match? He seemed to protect you too, although you couldn’t place your finger on why.

So when the next game was announced to be something called ‘mingle’ you had no idea what it meant—Only that it would be dangerous. “Stick by me.” Young-il demanded before the game started. As you got onto the platform, it started to spin. The platform spun—like a carousel—for about a minute as a children’s song, sung in Korean, was played over the speakers. It was both charming and eerie.

Just then, the number ‘four’ was called. Young-il grabbed your hand and pushed you into a room with two other people before locking the doors. “What is going on!?” You ask, frightened. “It’s the game.” Young-il responds. “They’ll kill everyone who isn’t in a room.” Suddenly, there are gunshots, followed by loud screams. You cover your ears in fear. The gunshots and screams slowly die down. The silence is deafening.

You look up at Young-il, your eyes wide with fear and confusion. He squeezes your hand reassuringly. After a few tense moments, the door to your room bursts open. You are forced to play round after round, slowly inching farther and farther apart from player 001. Even with all the deaths, there are too many players in the way…yet every time, Young-il miraculously finds you and pulls you into an empty room before the timer ends.

In room after dread-filled room, you endure the nightmare. Each ‘mingle’ round kills off more and more players. Finally, the last round arrives. “How many do you think this time?” You ask shakily. Young-il looks at you with a grim expression. “Two.” The music starts up again, and the platform begins to spin once more. “Why?” You ask as the final round begins, the platform spins lazily, the childhood melody twisted into something unsettling.

Young-il keeps a tight grip on your hand. “There are 126 of us left, and there are fifty rooms.” He pauses, looking you dead in the eye with a calm intensity. “They’ll kill the rest.” And just as 001 said, the number called out is ‘two.’ Everyone is scrambling to get to a door. Pushing, shoving, and even throwing people out of the way just to survive. Young-il grabs your arm and leads you to a yellow room, pushing a player out of the way in the process. Once you get inside, there is a plump man in the corner—Player 343.

‘Eight.’

‘Seven.’

‘Six.’

Player 343 sits huddled in the corner, eyes wide and terrified. Young-il locks the door and turns to the man. “Get out.” He demands. “We were here first.” Says player 343, as 001 walks over to him and puts him in a tight headlock, slowly choking him. You press your back the door in horror. What was Young-il doing?

The screeches and screams from outside are impossible to tune out as you press your hands against your ears. You can hear all the pain and misery—and the gunshots haven’t even started yet.

‘Five.’

‘Four.’

‘Three.’

Suddenly the door behind you is banged on by one of the players Young-il pushed out of the way to save you. “Open the door, you bastards!” He screams. “I was here first!” You look back at Young-il, who is still choking 343 as the timer counts down. “I’m sorry!” You say as you keep the door shut.

What were you supposed to do? There was now way to justify your actions…but you needed to stay alive. Yet this is the very thing you never wanted to be. A killer.

‘Two.’

‘One.’

As the countdown hits zero, a loud ‘game over’ is announced over the speakers in korean. Gunshots ring out as the door automatically locks. You look over your shoulder to Young-il and the corpse of player 343—the man he had just snapped the neck of. You cover your mouth with your hands in horror as Young-il gets up and walks over to you. “I did what I had to do.”

He stands over 343's lifeless body, breathing heavily. The blood rushing in his ears drowns out the sound of his own heartbeat. He turns to face you, seeing the horror etched on your face. "Look at me." His voice is low and urgent, commanding your attention amidst the chaos of your frightened thoughts. "Look at me," He repeats, grasping your shoulders firmly. "In these games, It's kill or be killed." You nod your head in understanding, wiping your shallow tears.

You would never understand.

A/N: Sorry if this is bad, it’s my first time writing for squid games.

[my-castles-crumbling]

airport - October 15th - jegulus - @taylorswiftmicrofic - word count: 343

"Hello?"

Biting his lip, Regulus answered his phone, knowing he probably shouldn't. What was the point, anyway? He and James were done. They hadn't ever started, really. It had been a fling, hidden behind closed doors during a few summer months, while Regulus had been in the city to visit Sirius.

And sure, Regulus had ached for something more. Tried desperately not to catch feelings even as he felt James smash down walls, melting in hazel eyes while staring at stunning smiles. But he couldn't think about that. James Potter wasn't his to have.

So why did he answer the phone?

It had been only two hours since their numb goodbye, not even a kiss shared between them, a promise of maybe a text or a phone call down the road, but nothing more. And now, James was calling him already?

But he answered. "Hello?" he asked, wondering what, exactly, James could say to make him feel better about the empty void in his chest.

"This is nothing like the movies," James's harried voice spoke from the other end of the line, sounding stressed and upset.

"Wh-what?" he asked, confused.

"Did you know that in real life, airports don't allow you to chase people to their gates, even if you tell them it's for a bloody important reason?"

Blinking, trying to understand, Regulus pressed a shaking hand to his lips, not daring to hope. "James, I-"

"This is quite embarrassing, really, but I'm stuck at security trying to do the whole confess-my-love-at-the-airport thing and I think I need your help, because apparently romance is dead. Would you, perhaps, meet me by the metal detectors so I can do this properly?"

And, so shocked he couldn't even react properly, Regulus just nodded, before he realized James couldn't see him. "Yeah. Yeah, I'll be there in a few," he answered softly, a tear falling from his eye.

"Good."

And as they called for his plane to begin boarding, he turned and walked in the opposite direction, toward where he knew James was waiting for him.

[mephistopholes-brain]

2,977 civilians died tragically in 9/11, 343 being firefighters.

Since then it has been “Never forget.” for over 20 years, the US attacked and destabilized an innocent country, and white ppl have further pushed the narrative that Muslims and Middle Easterners are all “evil terrorists”.

Now, in less than 6 months the OFFICIAL death toll in Gaza exceeds 30,000, half being CHILDREN. At least 200 doctors have died and many were TARGETED by IOF soldiers. I have seen children dismembered, maimed, sniped, run over, crushed, starved, scalped, exploded, burned, and strung up on the side of a building.

I have seen men, women, and children desperately digging through the rubble to find their mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, children, friends, lovers etc.

I have seen brave doctors run outside to save injured civilians while at extremely high risk of being shot by snipers.

I have seen a father carrying BAGS full of his children’s remains.

I have seen a young girl, no more than 9, with a leg, an arm, and a hand blown off while her scalp hangs from her skull.

I have seen doctors speak out against the cruelty and ethnic cleansing while surrounded by the bodies of those they tried to save.

I have seen hundreds of pictures of NICU babies who were going to die soon because the hospital was about to run out of electricity.

I have read the first hand story of a father who traded one of his children for one of his brother’s children so that if one group dies at least one of their children would make it.

I have read posts from lgbt+ KIDS talking about how they regret not kissing their crush because they just watched them DIE.

I have seen the public posts of IDF and IOF soldiers where they show off the underwear and lingerie they looted from the drawers of the Gazans they are massacring.

I have listened to the screams of mothers after hearing their child is dead.

I have watched a teen boy’s gaze harden into something cold and empty after his entire family died in front of him, leaving him completely alone.

I have seen an IOF soldier throw a father and his baby into a giant wood burning oven just for fun.

I have seen many children with shell-shock, shaking because their minds and bodies can’t comprehend the horrors they have experienced.

I have seen tanks run over women actively giving birth on the roads of Gaza.

I have watched oldest siblings, no more than 11, take on the responsibility of keeping their younger siblings safe. I cannot comprehend how incredibly stressful that must be.

A little 6yo girl was trapped for 2 weeks in a car surrounded by the dead bodies of her family as they rotted.

This is all done with American tax dollars while companies like McDonalds give free food to Israeli soldiers. We are quite literally paying for this. 20% of your work and hard earned money is paying for the genocide of innocent people in Palestine.

This is NOT a political issue. This is a human rights issue.

Pro-Palestine is Pro-Humanity.

[torpublishinggroup]

“Two is for discipline, heedless of trial; Three for the gleam of a jewel or a smile; Four for fidelity, facing ahead; Five for tradition and debts to the dead; Six for the truth over solace in lies; Seven for beauty that blossoms and dies; Eight for salvation no matter the cost; Nine for the Tomb, and for all that was lost.”

8-74-13-18 13-343-25-111 8-269-16-10 15-386-33-34 9-209-9-25 14-131-22-34 7-283-11-34 13-283-27-55 9-453-6-17 14-508-25-65 7-212-10-17 14-172-21-153.

[faecaptainofdreams]

“Reclaimer…?

Reclaimer, are you here?

Construct?

Please, do not give up on me.

I wish to right my wrongs.

The void around me is deafening; I cannot see.

There was…light, and heat, and the force of gravity surging through my circuits until I broke.

I remember…

I remember myself, I remember…Chakas…

I am Chakas…

I am 343 Guilty Spark.

Can anyone hear me…?

Are these pleas only in my mind?

I cannot engage my sensory processors; all I feel is suspension, so I must be adrift in space.

I am alone.

I am…afraid.

This is not peace, this is not relief.

Please do not let me pine here for eternity, trapped with my trauma and my memories, and yet another dead vessel.

Won’t someone, anyone, please find me…?”

[bloopitynoot]

Reading TGCF: Chapter Ten

For those who don't know, I am reading TGCF for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag Bloopitynoot reads TGCF. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read BUT if you followed along with my SVSSS read, the rules and vibe are the same.

I truly wish I could say this was a different tea, but from now on unless I state otherwise it's probably masala chai.

Body update: I feel less like trash than yesterday, but my right arm did take a hit LOL. Thankfully my hip is doing a lot better too so sitting is much better. (I'm not even a writer or specifically a writer on ao3, yet, it feels like I have the ao3 curse).

Nevertheless- onwards to chapter ten!

Immediately Xie Lian is here using his body to protect San Lang! You tell Fu Yao! p329

I should have waited one more sentence LOL. "Because...if I stand next to him, the snakes wont come". p329

omg. There is a 6th person in the pit and I am still not sold that that kid (a-zhao) is actually dead. I'm still thinking about the garden face man and what he was saying. p331

WTF- General Pei jr?? p333

okay! But now I need to know General Pei jr.'s motivation for destroying a whole city! p335

ofc Xie Lian knew General Pei jr from when he was General Hua. Who does this man not accidentally know? p336

Jeeze. Banyue's people were going to strap bombs to themselves if they lost. This is wild. Based on the history between the two warring countries I really don't think there was hope for a peaceful end. pp337-338

Oh yay! we finally get to meet the two cultivators from the street! Also that art is absolutely stunning, I love them both so much. I do hope we meet them again. pp341-343

Oh no! The entire time they have been running from her (The Wind Master) thinking she was evil as shit but she was actually trying to help them. p343

Dang this makes sense. General Pei jr couldn't just murder people directly because of his position. So, instead he lured them to their deaths (snake deaths, pit deaths, but definitely not him killing them technically!). This is some dictatorship misuse of power shit with full technical deniability for this guy. Gross. p345

Xie Lian had me suspicious about the wind master too, but thank fuck Banyue was let go for her good deeds. p347

Bro just wants to do the right and good things but heavenly politics are too much. He is definitely going to offend everyone at some point. p350

Whos cutting onions?? My heart at this small child who decided they would be building Xie Lian a large temple when they got home :'3 I'm totally normal about this. p352

The speed in which Nan Feng fled when Xie Lian offered to make food LOOOL Nan Feng: oh no, so sorry, my basement is on fire, and flooded, definitely need to leave right at this moment. Terribly tragic. p353

eeeeeeeeeeeeeep! "I still prefer the name 'San Lang'" p354

ONE CHAPTER LEFT!

Now the question is, how will mxtx ruin my life in the last chapter of this book?

I do own book 2, BUT I think tomorrow I will order the third in celebration of finishing book 1. I might do this the last chapter of each book to prep for more reads.

[black-parade-daily]

hospital

343/?

current song: Dead!

[gunsandspaceships]

MCU Timeline: Iron Man 2. Part 2

Part 1

2010

May 11, night - Stark Expo opening. Blood toxicity - 19%.

May 12, 9:00 am - 3:30 pm - Tony at the Senate Armed Services Committee hearings.

May 13, evening:

Tony is back home and has a video conference in 4 hours. Blood toxicity - 24%. 362 days of Expo left.

Tony (unofficially for now) appoints Pepper as CEO of SI.

May 14 - Tony officially transfers the management of the company to Pepper.

Note: confirmation of 2010 from S.H.I.E.L.D. dossier. The Avengers (deleted scene).

Between May 14 and May 23 - Tony hires Natasha as his new PA.

May 23 - Tony in Monaco. Vanko attacks him on the race track. Blood toxicity - 53%.

BAMF achievement: are you talking about Afghanistan, Tony?

May 24, 7:32 am PT - Tony and Pepper are on the Stark Jet flying home from Monaco. Three hours into the flight, Stern is interviewed by MSNBC.

May 25:

Hammer arranges Vanko's escape and brings him to his place. Ivan begins work on drones, his reactor 2.0 and a suit.

Night - Tony searches for information about Vanko after he was declared dead.

Another f*ck up in dates - the screens say 05.06.10. For that to be true, we'd have to move Tony's birthday and change the Expo countdown.

May 29 (Saturday):

Tony's birthday. Blood toxicity - 89%.

10 pm - party.

Rhodey steals Mark II and fights Tony, then flies away.

May 30:

Morning - after ~10 hours of doing something somewhere Rhodes finally brings Mark II to Edwards Air Force Base.

Tony eats donuts in a donut. Fury and Natasha give him a pep talk and lithium dioxide.

Hammer brings Ivan not his bird and notices that he makes drones, not suits.

USAF calls in Hammer to outfit stolen Mark II with his weapons.

Afternoon - Fury tells Tony that Howard was the founder of S.H.I.E.L.D. and gives him a chest of Howard's things.

Evening - Hammer gets his hands on Mark II and turns it into "War Machine".

Tony looks through his father's notes and receives his message recorded in 1973.

May 31:

Morning - Tony goes to apologize to Pepper and finds the "Key to the Future".

Afternoon - Tony (re)discovers a new element and orders components for a particle accelerator. Meanwhile, he drills more holes into his house, eventually turning it into a piece of Swiss cheese.

June 1:

343 days of Stark Expo left.

Morning - Tony builds his particle accelerator. Coulson is reassigned to New Mexico.

Note: As we've established in Thor's timeline, its events take place in November 2011. Not May/June 2010. I could do some logical gymnastics and stretch it to 2010 (which would already create a mess), but there's no way it could be in May/June.

Afternoon - Tony finishes the particle accelerator and synthesizes the new element at home.

Note: mention of 2010 again.

Evening - Vanko finishes his suit and the drones.

6:20 pm - Vanko calls Tony. Tony heads to New York in the new Mark VI.

40 minutes is most probably an exaggeration, since it is unlikely that Tony could get from Malibu to Flushing in less than 40 minutes. In any case, Tony didn't have time for anything else, especially considering that he needed time to assemble his new suit.

7-9 pm - Hammer and Vanko at the Stark Expo. Tony and Rhodey fight Vanko and defeat him. He blows himself and the Expo up. Tony saves Pepper and 8-year-old Peter Parker. Pepperony's first kiss.

Considering that other things tell us it's been 19 days since Pepper became CEO, Tony's "a week" line is an exaggeration. And Pepper plays along, just like she did with 12% in The Avengers.

I could write a whole post about why it could not be just a week (from Expo opening to the fight) as it's stated in other timelines, but I'll just give you one question to think about: how many days Ivan would need to build all those drones, a new reactor and a suit? Probably not 2.

A week later - Fury gives Tony Natasha's assessment of him and offers him a position as a consultant at S.H.I.E.L.D. Tony accepts.

Mid June - Senator Stern awards Tony and Rhodey with medals.

The Consultant

Second half of 2010:

The World Security Counsel still supports the Avengers Initiative at this point. But they want The Abomination on the team. Coulson and Sitwell send Tony to sabotage the transfer between General Ross and S.H.I.E.L.D. He succeeds, and Blonsky remains in prison.

After that, the WSC loses interest in the Avengers Initiative.

Thor (2011) Timeline

Captain America: The First Avenger (2011) Timeline

The Avengers (2012) Timeline

[retrogamer2099]

Retro_G is back with another art cover for Halo Infinite "Surviving the Undead" this mode is called "Countdown of the Undead". Like comment and Subscribe! THX.

[short-wooloo]

What Spartans Remain?

Because I went down the Halopedia rabbit hole and I'm an obsessive nut, I've put together a list of all the Spartan-IIs, just to figure out who's alive, who's dead, who's missing, and the numbers which are unaccounted for

Alright so, there were at least 150 candidates considered for Spartan-IIs, half were conscripted, and of that 75, we have at least 50 named (or at least numbered) individuals

Alive (when last we saw them):

Jai-006

Naomi-010

Leon-011

Serin-019 (washout)

Robert-025

Douglas-042

Linda-058

Maria-062 (semi-retired)

Cassandra-075 (washout)

Fhajad-084 (washout)

Kelly-087

Jerome-092

Musa-096 (washout)

August-099

Fred-104

Adriana-111

John-117 (duh)

Michael-120

Alice-130

Definitely Dead:

Li-008 (2552)

Daisy-023 (unknown date during war, 2526-2552)

Joshua-029 (2552)

Otto-031 (2557)

Samuel-034 (2525)

Randall-037 (2556)

William-043 (2552)

Anton-044 (2552)

Kurt-051 (2552)

Jorge-052 (2552)

Margaret-053 (2557)

Malcolm-059 (2552)

Sheila-065 (2544)

Solomon-069 (2544)

Spartan-073 (2525)

Arthur-079 (2544)

Grace-093 (2552)

Victor-101 (2557)

Ralph-103 (unknown date during war, 2526-2552)

Oscar-129 (2525)

Cal-141 (2544)

Roma-143 (2557)

Unidentified Trainee (2525)

Unidentified Spartan (2531)

Maybe Dead:

James-005 (2552)

Vinh-030 (2552)

Isaac-039 (2552)

Beta-Romeo Actual (2552)

Red Fifteen (2552)

Red Four (2552)

Red Nineteen (2552)

Status unknown:

Kirk-018 (washout, possibly rehabilitated)

Keiichi-047 (alive as of 2531)

Soren-066 (alive as of 2527)

Rene-081 (washout, possibly rehabilitated)

Joseph-122 (alive as of 2525)

Carris-137 (alive as of 2520)

Spartans-116, 118, 119, 121, 123, and 124 (possibly the unidentified trainee and Spartan, as well ass Beta-Romeo Actual, Red-Fifteen, Red Four, and Red Nineteen)

Missing numbers:

Spartans number 001, 002, 003, 004, 007, 009, 012, 013, 014, 015, 016, 017, 020, 021, 022, 024, 026, 027, 032, 033, 035, 036, 038, 040, 041, 045, 046, 048, 049, 050, 054, 055, 056, 057, 060, 061, 063, 064, 067, 068, 070, 071, 072, 074, 076, 077, 078, 080, 082, 083, 085, 086, 088, 089, 090, 091, 094, 097, 098 (according to the silver timeline, Spartan-098 is named "Nora"), 100, 102, 105, 106, 107, 108, 109, 110, 112, 113, 114, 115, 126, 127, 128, 131, 132, 133, 135, 136, 138, 139, 140, 142, 145, 146, 147, 148, 149, 150 (I'm sure I messed up somewhere)

obviously given that not all 150 candidates were recruited, some (about 70) of these numbers did not actually become Spartans, trainees or otherwise, such as Caleb-095, the father of Olympia Vale

Additionally, Spartans-028 (Riz), 125 (Kai), and 134 (Vanak) do exist per 343's internal documentation, but as of yet have not appeared in the Prime timeline

therefore there are about 19 confirmed living Spartans, 24 confirmed dead, 7 possible dead, and 12 unknowns, for a total of 62 (or 65 counting the silvers), so there are at least 10-13 other Spartans we have not met, be they active, retired, washout, dead, or missing

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

I absolutely adore doing these since they make people laugh. Some are from a generator and I tweak them to fit our beloved characters. Some are from my own brain. I can’t really copyright these but please take into consideration that yes, some are my own and not generated. :)

• #301 Burn the trash

• #302 I'm a witch

• #303 Gotcha a kitten

• #304 Hate yourself

• #305 I need help

• #306 No take backs

• #307 Flirting?

• #308 Positive

• #309 Owe ya one

• #310 Milkshake

• #311 6 weeks

• #312 Deer!

• #313 Tutor

• #314 Look intelligent

• #315 Agree with me?

• #316 Shipping

• #317 Lock pick

• #318 No free seats

• #319 Gift

• #320 Stay forever

• #321 We're grown-ups

• #322 Not in love

• #323 Personal problems

• #324 Motor? Murder?

• #325 Dumbass

• #326 Get help

• #327 Murder mystery

• #328 We don't argue

• #329 Sorting hat

• #330 Be careful

• #331 Crazy idea

• #332 Just say no

• #333 The knife incident

• #334 Go back to bed

• #335 Fluffy

• #336 Picking locks

• #337 Objection

• #338 Consequences

• #339 Bedtime story

• #340 Eyeroll

• #341 Ain't dead yet

• #342 Less right

• #343 Frightening

• #344 Glowsticks

• #345 Travel-sized

• #346 Go fish

• #347 Dog's pancakes

• #348 What'd she do?

• #349 Sea soup

• #350 Lapse in judgment

[schweizercomics]

Companions of Christmas, Dec 1: Santa Claus

Santa or Saint Nicholas (“Santa” means “Saint,” and “Claus” is short for “Niklaus/Nicolas) was born to wealthy parents in a small port city in Asia Minor. Nicholas became a gift-giver at a young age when, upon learning that three sisters who wished to wed their loves could not do so because they had no dowry with which to pay their future husband’s family, he tossed coins through their window in the dead of night. Finding that he could so easily change lives for the better and bring hope to those who had little through these small acts of generosity, he sold his property and belongings and used the money to continue helping those he found in need. As he was already following his god Jesus’s order “sell what you possess and give the money to the poor,” it was only natural that he would adhere to the next dictate “then come, follow me,” which he did, becoming first a Christian priest, and, soon after, the bishop of Myra.

Nicholas, a noted brawler even during his bishophood, never backed down from a fight in service to others. He frequently found himself rescuing the innocent from execution, saving children from those who would exploit them, and battling monsters and creatures long viewed by the Christians as servants of evil. But instead of killing these foes, Nick would recruit them. Using both force and Christian magic, he would make them accompany him on his errands and missions of mercy, and the exposure to his generosity and kindness changed their perception and their hearts, turning them from forces of destruction to forces of good, though few lost any of their wildness.

Nicholas was born a mortal man, and died one, at the age of seventy-three, on December 6, 343. His devotion to his faith and service to his neighbors ensured his place in heaven, but heaven was no paradise for Nick, who fretted constantly for the children of the world. He petitioned the three aspects of God for a charter, to return to earth and bring joy and comfort to its children through acts of charity and joy. His charter was granted, and he returned to earth one year later, and he has done his good works each December since.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Happy December, friends! Each year around this time I post up drawings of Christmas and other winter holiday figures, along with narratives to explain the practices with which folklorists and holiday buffs might be familiar. When stories exist, I use them; when they don't, I do what I can to piece together what folklore surrounds them to fill in the gaps (or, in some instances, defer to the theories of my friend and fellow narrative reconcilianist Benito Cereno). I hope you enjoy them!

[aegor-bamfsteel]

How do you think Theon Greyjoy would have fared at the Archery contest during the Hand’s Tourney in AGOT?

As mentioned in a similar ask about Sarella, Anguy won that contest by outshooting “Ser Balon Swann and Jalabhar Xho at a hundred paces after all the other bowmen had been eliminated at the shorter distances,” (AGOT, Eddard 7) which can be estimated at about 250 feet. Has Theon ever been shown to shoot that far, and (if not), can we estimate his maximum range from known cases? (No, of course I wouldn’t just say “pretty well” or “not great” based on reputation).

Right off the bat, Theon has a few more instances of shooting arrows than Sarella (who just has the one scene in the AFFC Prologue) mentioning that he’s been practicing archery under Dagmer Cleftjaw (so before the age of 9) and had pretty good accuracy even then (saying he put an arrow through a “seagull on the wing” in ACOK Theon 3). Tyrion, a complete stranger, vaguely remembers Theon being “good with a bow” (ACOK Tyrion XI), and it sounds like he was one of the archers who shot down the Frey ravens (AGOT Catelyn IX) among Brynden Tully’s men. However, I’ve found two instances of Theon shooting arrows where we can roughly estimate the distance (if anybody has found other cases, please point them out).

Drunk, Theon decided, watching [Todric] bellow. It was said that the ironmen of old had oft been blood-drunk in battle, so berserk that they felt no pain and feared no foe, but this was a common ale-drunk. "Wex, my bow and quiver." The boy ran and fetched them. Theon bent the bow and slipped the string into its notches as Todric knocked down the Botley boy and flung ale into his eyes. Fishwhiskers leapt up cursing, but Theon was quicker. He drew on the hand that clutched the drinking horn, figuring to give them a shot to talk about, but Todric spoiled it by lurching to one side just as he loosed. The arrow took him through the belly. The looters stopped to gape. Theon lowered his bow. "No drunkards, I said, and no squabbles over plunder." On his knees, Todric was dying noisily. "Botley, silence him." Fishwhiskers and his sons were quick to obey. They slit Todric's throat as he kicked feebly, and were stripping him of cloak and rings and weapons before he was even dead. —ACOK Theon III

Theon intends to shoot at Todric’s drinking horn but shoots him in the belly instead due to sudden movement, so he’s close enough to see fairly small objects. He’s also able to make himself heard to the people next to Todric without it being mentioned that he had to move closer or raise his voice. A normal conversational voice is 60 decibels (dB). Sound pressure level normally halves (by six decibels) for each doubling of distance, meaning the distance between Theon and Todric at the point of shooting was about 40 feet.

The other instance is when Theon, carrying a longbow and with long razor-tipped broadhead arrows, shoots Stiv when he holds a dagger at Bran’s throat:

A low thrum came from the woods behind them. Stiv gave a choked gasp as a half foot of razor-tipped broadhead suddenly exploded out of his chest. The arrow was bright red, as if it had been painted in blood. The dagger fell away from Bran's throat. The big man swayed and collapsed, facedown in the stream. —AGOT Bran V

Bran is able to hear (though quietly) Theon shoot the arrow before it makes impact with Stiv’s chest. This is fairly significant because at shorter distances, Bran wouldn’t have been able to detect the arrow’s shooting and impact as separate events, and it’s estimated that humans can separate sounds as little as 20-30 milliseconds apart. Since sound travels 343 m/s through air, that puts the minimum distance of Theon from Stiv at 6.86m or 20.6 feet. However, that doesn’t take into account how loud the thrum of Theon’s bow is. It may be surprising that longbows are actually one of the quietest bows (the recurve is louder, and the crossbow the loudest) and the larger arrows like broadheads make quieter noises when shot, because the energy the bowstring would’ve made slapping the wood is transferred into hurling the arrow. According to this thread, the longbow firing could be around 74dB or over 10 times louder than normal conversation, about as loud as a vacuum cleaner. Using the same formula for sound over distance as in the Todric example, 74dB can be heard from about 90 feet away, meaning the distance between Stiv and Theon was between 20 and 90 feet (though admittedly, definitely closer to 90, maybe about 85 feet).

That’s about all I can estimate about Theon’s maximum archery distance; it’s less than 100 feet, far less than Anguy’s winning distance of 250 feet. It seems his archery talent is more in his accuracy at hitting small (sometimes moving) targets at somewhat “close” distances rather than hitting larger stationary targets at very far distances (maybe significant foreshadowing for his role in protecting the Starks in TWOW?) Meanwhile, the Hand’s Archery Contest in AGOT was based on who could hit archery butts from the farthest pace away, which is definitely not Theon’s strong point if my textual analysis means anything. Just based on what I can determine about sound distance from two more detailed scenarios of his shooting, Theon would probably make it to the early-middle rounds of the Hand’s Archery Contest and get eliminated by 40 paces/100 feet from the targets, (and probably insult all the men who got further than he did and mock the idea of Ned getting a tourney in general to make himself feel better about losing so soon).