#-love addict-
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-The odd I see -
I sometimes wonder if my body is the Argos
Ever faithful
Ever holding on
Refusing
To give up until my soul completes it's epic journey
In the end
They will meet for a finale moment
With just enough time to say goodbye
Oh
The odd I see
#the odd i see#poetry#original#my words#my writing#-love addict-#poem#poetic#poets on tumblr#emotinal#shmitty
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#cute cats#cats of tumblr#cat#cats#kitten#kitty#beautiful#beauty#nature aesthetic#vintage aesthetic#aesthetic#nature appreciation#nature addict#nature lovers#nature#aestheitcs#art#cottagecore#witch#witchy#cozy cottage#cottage aesthetic#cottage witch#vintage style#vintage#love#lifestyle#life#flowers#animals
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5 years ago, I was in Rehab.
10 years ago, I was watching my Potential and Opportunities dissolve and evaporate in an ocean of cheap gin and expensive whiskey.
But 5 years ago, I was in Rehab.
One of the exercises they had us perform was to imagine ourselves happy, 5 years in the future.
Many of us in that room had forgotten how to imagine nice things happening to them. A few snorted (well, I snorted), finding the notion that we’d even still be around in 5 years grimly humorous.
For about half of us, it was the last stop on the way down.
But I indulged the therapist. I was there, after all, because I did not want to die. So, I imagined myself, 5 years hence.
Happy.
It came to me all at once; an artistic remix on Norman Rockwell’s Freedom From Want, reframed with myself placing food at the table.
Sunday Dinner At My Place, I answered, when it came my turn to share my fantasy. I was asked what food I imagined eating.
It’s not the meal itself, I said, it’s the implications framed around it. Sunday Dinner At My Place means that I have a Place. It means that I have Family that will actually speak to me and friends who actually want to see me. It means money enough not just to feed myself but others too. It means having the time to spare to take the time preparing the meal.
A lot of nodding heads all around me. A struck chord. Many people with no Place, in that place. Nowhere that would lament their leaving.
5 years hence, as I lay down to sleep in my Home, with my Wife and my Son, surrounded by my Art and my Flowers, I reflect.
It was a long road. It was hard. We lost people. So many people. There were long days and long nights and hospital stays. Angry arguments with ghosts. I changed, in ways I never hoped for, or expected. Good ways, finally, for once. Slowly, against the backdrop of a world in chaos, I found my mind.
Sometimes, My Wife wondered aloud, what she did to deserve me. After some stumbling with my feelings, I eventually settled on an answer.
I’m a Rescue.
She gave me a Home.
And, so, I gave her a Family.
It seemed fair
This Sunday, my folks, which whom I have not had a shouting match in years, will come over for dinner. We will cook and eat together. My Friend became My Wife, and she took a piece of me and with it she made Our Son. There will be many hugs, and no violence. Good Things Happened.
I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t know what the future holds.
don’t give up yet, ok?
It could get good, even.
#troglodyte thoughts#tales from Real Life#cw addiction#cw alcohol#sometimes the light at the end of the tunnel is the headlamp of an approaching train#run#fight#hide#SURVIVE#do not go into the light#there are unpet dogs#and unhugged children#and unseen sunsets#and maybe even love#even for a wretch like me#the best part of your life might be old age#you don’t know
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"so grunkle ford how do you know bill?"
"... that's not important."
#so they got heavily drunk and sung karaoke and 'one thing led to another' yeah mhm stanford pines i know what you are#they're so awful for each other i hate them so much#something about loving you like an alcohol addict idk#irls keep scrolling shh i'm okay dw#stanford pines#ford pines#bill cipher#<- i accidentally twinkified him in this angle i swear his full design is neat this is my first time coloring human him 🙏#whoops#billford#the book of bill#book of bill#gravity falls#gravity falls fanart#i'm so good at posting miscellaneous sketches and making them cohesive guys trust#s0up1tart
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i want addicts to be safe and fed and housed and loved unconditionally i am 100% serious
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Is it considered plagiarism if you're copying your own comic?
╮ (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ╭
#epic the musical#odysseus#telemachus#athena#epic comic#??? not really but i wanted to put it on a tag that I could find later#i dont gonna start making comics again#i think#i just thought this one fit too perfectly and had to remake into odysseus showing thelemacus to athena#hamilton and odysseus love their son a lot#odysseus could teach a thing or two about fidelity to hamilton tho#I know 99% of epic fandom used to be addicted to hamilton ok I can smell y'all
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"Who do we know that did drugs? I got it!" Batman said, calmly.
Dick Grayson and Bruce Wayne stood in the Batcave, looking over some data on the Batcomputer.
Dick: None of us have done drugs or made drugs, but we need someone who's versed in it. Who?
Bruce (excited, sudden realization): I got it! Call Jason!
Dick: He blocked you again?
Bruce looked a bit sheepish, but quickly recovered.
Bruce (defensive): You’re not calling him?!
Sighing, Dick reluctantly pulled out his phone and dialed Jason’s number. Jason answered, but before Dick can say a word, Bruce suddenly knocked him to the ground and snatched the phone from his hand.
Bruce: Are you still friends with Roy? We need to learn how crack is made. We’re tracking someone!
There’s a pause on the other end of the line. Then, Jason started laughing—slowly at first, then breaking into fits of uncontrollable laughter. In the background, a weary sigh can be heard that isn’t Jason’s.
Jason (laughing, catching his breath): I’ll ask him. Hey Roy—
Roy (in the background, exasperated): Fuck you!
Jason (chuckling, responds to Bruce): I think he can help us.
Bruce: Oh, thank God.
Dick, now back on his feet, glaring at Bruce with a mix of annoyance and disbelief.
Dick: You could’ve just asked for the phone!
Batman: Get over it.
Roy: You know I was on heroin not crack!
Batman: I will send you $6,000 if you are honest with me and tell me you at least know how it's made.
Roy (huffing as Jason laughs harder because he knows what's about to happen): Okay, you're going to need a pen.
#batfamily#batfamily fanfiction#batman#jason todd#dick grayson#roy harper#yes roy harper was addicted to drugs#don't worry jason only laughs to show he loves roy#i know roy is annoyed but it's all out of love#batfamily chronicles#batfamily shenanigans#batfam shenanigans#batfamily headcanons#batfamily funny#batfamily comedy#headcanon batfamily#roy harper and jason todd#roy haper and jason todd#roy harper arsenal#microfiction#flash fiction#batfamily microseries#script fic#part of my batfamily flash fiction#batfamily fic#batfamily fluff#dc fanfiction#batfamily chronicles flash fiction#batfamily flash fiction
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POV: You're the oldest sibling
it's tough being the oldest.
<- Prev Masterlist Next ->
Bonus:
#it's tough being a single mom. especially when youre a man with no children.#give me a dick grayson who's always on the precipice of either strangling his siblings or showering them with love#im not really a ''tim drake is a coffee addict'' truther however i do think he should be an absolute diva when it comes to food orders#that single period that dick sends is that 10% of rage that just barely seeped thru#also dude's like 30 he def does not understand the slang of the youth ''lock in?? tf does that mean??''#also my girl stephanie deserves to be smart asf!! i wanna see her thriving#social media au#batfamily#batfam#dick grayson#jason todd#stephanie brown#tim drake#batkids#nightwing#red hood#spoiler#red robin#duke thomas#signal#bruce wayne#batman#batdad#dc comics#twitter#tweets#texts#incorrect quotes#fanatical posting
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I guess what gets me about fatphobia is seeing someone literally recovering from addiction and gaining weight being framed as a bad thing because a substance use problem that is eating you from the inside out is preferable so long as you are twenty pounds lighter.
It has never been about people's health.
#fatphobia#fatphobia tw#addiction tw#drugs tw#drug mention tw#dear gd was seeing that bleak as hell#if i see one more 'its for your health that i'm fatphobic!!!' i'm going to actually scream#i can't IMAGINE how it is for people who are told that *personally*. much love and respect and solidarity for you all genuinely 🫂
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going through my old journals as part of therapy homework and i'm reading a section written in the emotional wreckage of a full-on breakdown when i get hit with this line:
There is never a satisfying answer to ‘Why didn’t they love me?’
like wow babe. good fucking point
#like you were on the ground biting the carpet and dry sobbing while you wrote that and still. good fucking point#not a shitpost#cptsd#and it's true. there's never a satisfying answer#the truth is i know why i wasn't loved#i analyzed my parent's traumas and abuse to death. i understand why i alienated and was alienated from my siblings#i know why my mom was too overwhelmed to be capable of nurturing#i know why my dad vanished into addiction and avoidance#the details of our cycles of trauma and cptsd and family history i have a phd in all of it#i understood perfectly. i spent years studying and now i knew the answer#and guess what? IT WAS NOT SATISFYING!!!#because they still didn't love me! and i still couldn't change that!#it was still a completely unsatisfying state of affairs!#so like. when the people who are supposed to love you...don't.#when the people who are supposed to take care of you...fail to#you can look for answers and reasons and explanations#but that's not actually going to FIX your situation.#and it's probably not within your ability TO fix the situation. (and definitely not your job)#because you don't need answers--you need a new situation#*inserts Just Walk Out. You Can Leave!!! (Running Skeleton) Meme*#and yes. walking out isn't always possible.#but for you i hope it will be one day soon. and i hope you build the courage to take that leap.#stepping away from the people who failed to love you...it feels like being untethered but also like being lighter than air#new and scary. immensely relieving. the future opens up. empty but empty like a canvas. blindingly bright until your eyes adjust#like climbing out of a pit you called home and for the first time realizing how bright the light of day can truly be#when you aren't just getting glimpses from the bottom of a hole
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Water
Oh if you could understand
My mind is a Stillwater pond
Each thought
A raindrop that causes more ripples
Distorting what I see in the reflection of this world
They come down in such a torrential downpour
Till eventually that Stillwater pond
Is a raging River with violent rapids
Either way there is water to fill my lungs
And constantly
I am drowning
-l.a.-
#original#my words#my writing#-love addict-#poem#poetic#poetry#poets on tumblr#emotinal#shmitty#water
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Older men are the strongest drugs and I'm addicted.
#oopsie#teacher crush community#teacher crush#tc crush#male tc#teacher love#teacher x student#tc community#i like older men#older man younger woman#oldermen#older guys#addiction#girlblogging#just girlboss things#just girly things#just girly thoughts#just girly posts#just girls being girls#sillyposting#male teacher crush#teacher attachment#femaledaily#female hysteria#female rage#male teacher x female student#student x teacher#male teacher#coquette#this is a girlblog
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how i sleep after slicing my legs open
#self h@rm#self mutalition#988blr#baby cvts#i love styro#styroblr#made of styro#styro loml#cutt1ng#cvtting addict
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i feel like i never draw tim smiling but bb robin tim smiles a lot! (in between angst and tragedy)
brought to you by my continued attempts at figuring out tim’s early robin hair
#dc#sart#tim drake#he’s got smug cat energy and i love him#most of these are referencing moments from tim’s earlier appearances which i /tried/ to track down but they’re like scattered across#like 4 different series and bleh#’tec 365-367 does have Batman and robin fight a villain thru the power of Tim’s mad gaming skills while Jim Gordon gets addicted to video#games in the background#ringing in the new year w my boy 😤#I started this a while ago but got stuck in anatomy hell#are u really an artist if u’ve never stripped downt to ur underwear so u can stand in front of a big mirror#and stare furiously at ur own joints
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billford yaoi billford yuri i love them all
#that first one Will be colored eventually i like it too much#I LOVE THEM IM SORRY theyre so addicting to draw#billford#stanford pines#bill cipher#my billford yuri are stella pines and... bill cipher#triangles dont have a real concept of gender so i really dont see anything changing for bill like. at all. maybe a slightly different voice?#but thats it#so their ship name would be billa :]#gravity falls#stella pines#i think ill draw her more in the future so ill start a tag here#gf#my art
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Showing him off because I'm proud as hell
I think the doorwings are one of the best parts because guess what! I animated them
So basically the animations they have: Idle, walking, running, swimming, jumping, hurt
He was a pain to texture and at some point I got scared I'll have to start from scratch, mostly because I messed up the files and the textures wouldn't apply. Obviously in the end I fixed it because I simply can't stop winning.
His animations also got a bit messed up. I planned for it to be possible to run and jump without the jumping animation interrupting the running one but oh well.(Not sure what went wrong I adjusted the priorities correctly)
Also I'm thinking of adjusting the hurt animation to be faster because it's not as clear
Annndddd also have a regular skin of him I made. He's very bald though
It's just that I got too hungry and bit his doorwings off. Whoopsies!
Anyway 👋
#transformers#transformers fanart#prowl#transformers prowl#I've been waiting to share this for a while#I LOVE making skins with the customiseable player models!!!!!!! it's such a pain sometimes but it's so addicting#like imagine being able to run around in minecraft as your favourite stupid goober#but with a little more detail than the vanilla skin can provide#that's SO awesome#the only reason I haven't made more animations for his wings is because I didn't have ideas#otherwise they would've had a reaction to as much actions as I can make animations to#tbh I'm open for suggestions but I'm not promising I'll end up doing anything (lazy)
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