#*depressed lesbian noises*

[forcebook]

As long as I live, you will always be loved.

[lovelettersfromluna]

Not Strong Enough

Summary: Rule number 1 of being best friends with a vampire. Never let them drink your blood.

an: I HEAR YOU ALL YELLING AT ME IM SORRY!! This took entirely too long to get to you guys, but it’s here now! Better late than never right?? Is this heavily inspired by twilight? Yes. Did I use a BoyGenius song as the title? It’s lesbian smut, obviously. Is Ellie going to be a brooding depressed vampire? Oh hell yeah. I hope you all like this! I’m a slut for anything supernatural so this was obvi very fun for me to write. As always, love you all so so much! Thanks for reading 🤍

Warnings: SMUT!!, MDNI!!, scissoring (if ur mad I’m doing another scissoring fic….idk what to tell you it’s hot), messy kissing, Ellie bites reader (outside of blood sucking), mentions of marking, mentions of bruises, mentions of blood, Ellie is kind of insufferable for a small bit but I promise it gets better, please lmk if I missed anything!

Read part 1 here!!

Ellie knew it was a bad idea from the very beginning.

She knew that she was too weak for you, even outside of sucking your blood. You were too fucking good for her, too much of a dream for Ellie to go and fuck up like she did.

Truth be told, Ellie expected all of it. She expected to get utterly addicted to you, she expected the blurred lines of your relationship to become even more blurred when she began sucking you dry of your life source, she even expected herself to lose control when she was in the act, humping and grinding your soft body like a wild fucking animal as if she had no control over herself.

She expected all of it, every single aspect that came with the territory, she knew was coming.

But the hardest part of it all? Was leaving you completely.

Because she knew the moment she felt herself lose control while she was on top of you that night in your apartment, she knew she needed to leave you. She needed to abandon you and your friendship for the greater good, for your sake.

Ellie knew that she wasn’t good for you, and you weren’t good for her. But that didn’t make the pain of not seeing you any less.

She thought she’d be able to do it at first, but the texts from you only reminded her of how much she loved your company, how obsessed she was with simply being around you.

She wound frown every time her phone went off, a low groan leaving her lips when she lifted it up to look at her screen, only to see it was from you.

Ellieeeeee

Where are you?

Haven’t seen u in the longest :((

Ellie can practically hear your pout in the way you text her. She knows you too well, and she knows that you aren’t handling her sudden disappearance well.

At this point, it’s been about two months since Ellie has seen you last? Maybe three? She stopped keeping count because it was driving her insane. It wasn’t even the blood supply that she missed, Ellie would go hungry ten times over, dying from starvation if it meant she could be around you without feeling she was robbing you of your life, ruining things that you were meant to experience because she was too fucking selfish.

Ellie misses you, and it pains her that she hasn’t been able to have you in so long.

Well…not entirely at least. She knew she’d lose her mind entirely if she couldn’t at least be around you for a few moments, so her usual nighttime visits become a bit more frequent when she decides she can’t be around you anymore. She’s a lot more careful when she does it though, knowing how sensitive you were to her presence. It was almost unbelievable how easily you’d woken up to her in your room in the past. She doesn’t know how she’d explain things if you woke up now, not having seen her in so long. So she’s extra aware of how much noise she makes.

Seeing you sleep is almost enough to keep Ellie’s demons at bay, the ones that screamed for you, yearned for you to be by her side, to have your warm skin pressed against her much colder one.

As per usual, she’s scaling up the brick wall of your apartment building, making her way up to your bedroom like thief in the night. You continue to leave your window open every night, and it breaks Ellie’s heart because she knows you’re doing it for her, most likely hoping she slips into your window as she usually does.

It means Ellie needs to be even more careful than she anticipated.

She doesn’t even dare to sit on your bed, standing in the corner of your room as she watches your chest rise and fall. She doesn’t even breathe, scared that the sound of it will wake you.

And she desperately wants to reach out and let her fingers run along your soft skin, desperate for the feeling that you always brought her when you’re near. It makes her fists balk at her sides as she practically itches to feel you, fighting back any and every thought that she had to touch you, if even for a moment.

But she doesn’t. Instead, he stays with you just before the sun rises. She knows it’s risky, and she knows she shouldn’t do it in the event that you wake up and see her. Even if she’s fast enough to dart out of your room before you can even call her name or turn the lights on, you’re too smart for that. You’d know what was happening before she can even begin to gaslight you into thinking it was simply a dream.

She can’t help herself, not when it comes to you. Seeing you sleep satisfies the burning feeling in her chest, the one that yearns so desperately for you, it’s enough to make her knees weak. It’s almost like you’re capable of evoking the same feelings she had when she was a human, when she was weak and stupid and felt nervous around women. Until you showed up, Ellie hadn’t experienced those feelings in a long time, she’d almost forgotten about them.

You always remind her though.

Like when she’s about to leave you, knowing she’s cutting it too close to the time you’re going to wake up and start your day. Her footsteps are practically silence, even against the old, creaky floorboards of your apartment.

She’s almost out of your window, one leg outside as she plants her foot against the fire escape when she hears it. You began mumbling in your sleep, tossing a bit, clearly bothered by whatever dream you were having. While this should’ve been the clearest sign for Ellie to leave as quickly as possible before your eyes opened a bit to see her, she doesn’t. Instead, she stays sat on your window sill, simply watching as you turn to face her, eyes still closed as you pout in your sleep.

If Ellie had a heart that was still beating, she’s sure it would’ve stopped. Because suddenly your mumbling is just clear enough for her to hear.

“Ellie….” You sigh out softly, barely loud enough for the undead girl to hear, but she does. Regardless of the city waking up below her, or the sound of your ceiling fan creaking about, she hears it. It makes her frown deeply, swallowing back the intense whimper that threatens to escape and echo throughout your room.

She isn’t sure if she’s ever left your room so quickly, the girls eyes going wide as she made the familiar path down the side of your building to your side walk.

Even when she got home that night, the vampire practically breaking the front door down of her apartment to get in, she couldn’t get the sound of your voice uttering her name so sweetly, calling out for her even in the depths of sleep that you were in, tugged so deeply by your dreams, you were still calling out for her.

Ellie knew that night, that she had to stay away from her. For both your sake, and her own.

And she’s right, because you were suffering just as much as Ellie was.

Ellie’s presence was always scarce, and while it bothered you a bit before you learned what she was, it made sense. She was a creature of the night, something that seemingly only existed in storybooks, coming to life and living the strange lifestyle that she did.

But you knew immediately that this was different.

The morning after you saw Ellie last left a bitter taste in your mouth. As you woke up that morning, your neck sore with the bruises of Ellie’s lips on your skin, body far too drained and tired even after a night of a sleep that was just a bit too deep. It was similar to almost all the times Ellie had drank from you the night prior.

So, why did you feel so bad that morning?

You knew that you didn’t owe Ellie anything, that you were the one to suggest this in the first place, so there truly wasn’t any room for you to be upset for reasons unknown. What were you even supposed to say to her? That you had a weird feeling? One that you desperately wanted her to relieve by telling you it was all okay?

As much as you wanted to, you knew things between you and Ellie weren’t like that.

You were her friend. You were just her friend, and as much as you wanted more, you knew deep down that if Ellie truly wanted you that way, she would’ve made you she’s a long time ago.

And maybe that’s what bothers you the most when this little dry spell occurs, because the sudden lack of her presence leaves you entirely too much time to dwell on things, wondering what it was that you did wrong, what you could have possibly said to create this sudden rift between the two of you.

Ellie had always been flirtatious, flashing that pretty smile in your direction that made you weak in the knees, calling you sweet names that made your heart beat faster. She was practically dangling it all right in front of your face, the frequent touches, the late night visits at the foot of your bed, all this time when you have her the benefit of the doubt, chalking it all up to her simply wanting to see you and nothing more than that, suddenly made no sense to you.

With time came confusion, and with confusion came anger, desperate to understand why she left you, what you had done to possibly make her so scarce so suddenly. And once the third month had hit without seeing Ellie, you were furious, feeling as though you had one choice and one choice only.

To find Ellie, and get the answers from her yourself.

You don’t go to Ellie’s apartment, not usually at least.

Ellie always told you she liked hanging out at your place, going on and on about how warm and cozy it was being there. She’d never admit it to you because she didn’t want you to think she was a freak, but being in a place that smelled so heavily like you made her brain go absolutely insane.

You’ve been there maybe a handful of times, sometimes heading to her place after a night out, or even stopping by whenever you were in the neighborhood. Bottom line was, your apartment was the designated hang out spot for you and Ellie.

Regardless though, you remember how to get there like it’s written on the back of your hand. You thought about Ellie’s apartment a lot, loving how much the space reflected her. You always wished you had the chance to stay there more often.

You can’t think about that though, not now. Not when you’re storming down the expensive halls of her complex down to her door, and landing a heavy fist on the door. All you can truly care about now, is seeing Ellie and demanding an explanation for her sudden disappearance.

And it’s all so unlike you, so out of your character. If it was anyone else, you’d let it go, giving yourself a few days to sulk before forgetting about it all together and simply moving on. Maybe it’s because it’s Ellie, and maybe it’s because you feel a tad bit used after being her personal buffet for the last few times you’d been around her, just for her to up and leave.

It’s most definitely that. You just don’t want to admit it in fears of sounding selfish.

You land another firm knock on her door when she doesn’t answer in time, feeling yourself grow angrier as the moments pass.

Soon, she’s finally opening the door. The image of her nearly takes your breath away.

Because Ellie always looks beautiful, perhaps it’s the fact that you haven’t seen her in some time, but she looks fucking ethereal standing before you. So tall, so confident, her eyes so fucking dark, piercing through your very soul as she stares down at you. Her lips look like rubies compared to her cold, pale skin, so plump and kissable.

All you can think about is the way they felt pressed against your throat, and it makes you lift your hand to press against the two small circular scars on your neck.

Ellie frowns deeply as she eyes you, eyebrows furrowed and expression virtually unreadable.

“What are you doing here” she mumbles out, shifting on her feet awkwardly. Her question alone sets the fire off in your chest again, making you seethe as you take a deep inhale before responding.

“Are you kidding me Ellie?” You practically spit out, staring up at the girl in disbelief.

She lets out a soft sigh, her tattooed hand coming up to rub her face roughly before it moves up to rub through her hair.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about” she manages before she tries shutting her door in your face. “You can’t be here” she mumbles out softly, the girl fully expecting to be able to shut the door.

You however, have other plans.

You’re quick to press your hand against the door, stopping her from closing it before you practically force yourself between it. Ellie’s eyes widen a bit at this, not used to seeing you so forward.

Soon, you’re pushing yourself into her apartment, your palm pressing against your forehead as you began pacing back and forth Ellie’s lavish apartment.

“I don’t…I don’t understand you Ellie. Is it something I said? Did I do something? If so please enlighten me I beg you” you blurt out, all of the words fumbling out of your mouth in one breath.

Ellie frowns deeply as she watches you pace back and forth her apartment, her eyebrows furrowed. She can truly see the damaged shes caused when she sees you like this, because it was much easier to watch you when you slept, so peaceful and unaware of the troubles that came with her absence. She knew you were going to blame yourself, and as much as she knew she couldn’t allow you to do that to yourself, she knew staying away was even more important.

Seeing you like this was possibly the hardest thing Ellie had to ever endure.

You don’t stop there, taking advantage of the lack of a response from Ellie to continue ranting.

“Is it because of the blood thing? If so I’m sorry. I am so fucking sorry for simply caring enough to make sure you didn’t die from starvation or whatever it is that happens to you when you don’t eat. I’m sorry for making sure that you were okay, if that was so wrong please tell me…” your words trail off as you let out an exasperated sigh, your feelings and emotions becoming far too much as you practically sob out to her.

But then you’re pausing, your chest rising and falling quickly as you struggle to catch your breath. Ellie isn’t entirely sure why you’ve suddenly stopped, your back towards her as you stand there, doing god knows what.

When you finally turn around, your eyes are red and your cheeks are wet with tears.

“Were you just….using me? As your personal fucking blood bag?” Your words are shaky as you hold back another sob, your fists balled down at your sides.

Ellie freezes when you say this, because this is exactly what she was fucking afraid of.

It was a common theme throughout…her people. Vampires were notoriously alluring, seducing countless innocent and clueless victims into being their personal meal. The humans were almost always oblivious to what was being done to them, vampires often times using this to their advantage to keep them under their spell for as long as possible. It would most commonly been done in a way that made the humans believe the vampires loved them, dangling them by a thread as they promised them a life of eternity together, to live in immortality, side by side until the end of times. It almost never ended that way though, the vampires would suck and suck and suck until one day they went a bit too far, and their obedient human keeled over and died.

Ellie never wanted things to be that way with you.

She never even wanted you to think it was that way. She wanted you to understand that this was entirely up to you, and it could stop whenever you wanted it to. It’s why she constantly voiced to you that this was still a factor right before she fed off of you. Ellie would rather die than use you for a source of food, because truthfully you were far too good for that, too fucking pure to be used as something as low as a food source.

So when the words leave your lips, Ellie sees red.

Shes in front of you in less than a second, towering over you and staring down into your tear soaked eyes. Her nostrils are flared as she tries to hold back from tearing down her entire apartment complex around the both of you.

“You can’t possibly be stupid enough to think I’d ever use you for something so low..” her voice is low, and there’s a gravel in it that makes your core tighten and your chest bloom with something you can’t quite place, a feeling that can only be shelved in your mind right next to where Ellie takes place.

You don’t hack one, hot tears continuing to spill from your eyes as you stare at her with furrowed eyebrows.

“It makes sense….get your fix and then leave me like I’m nothing…this was probably your plan all along” you grit out.

Ellie licks her lips, knowing that you’re hurting just as much as she is, and your words are simply coming from a place of confusion, desperate to understand why she did what she did to you, why she left without a trace.

She leans in, her face a mere inches from yours. You can smell her minty breath wafting onto your face, and it’s bizarre because even that has a slight chill to it. It makes your cheeks cold, and it makes you want to reach out and warm her up.

“I would rather die a million deaths before using you for that…you and I both know this” she seethes out.

And it makes you whimper, because Ellie’s always been so fucking intense, so poetic. It makes your insides flip upside down, and your eyebrows knit together as you struggle to hold back a whimper.

Your features soften as you continue to cry in front of her. “Then why did you leave me…” you whisper out to the girl.

It breaks her heart how desperate you are for this. Not even for her, but simply for answers. All you want is to understand why she left, what you did to make her abruptly disappear without a single word.

Ellie’s eyes flutter shut for a moment, her pink tongue darting out to lick her plush lips before she finally speaks.

“I’ve never…been so weak for someone…in my entire life” she breaths out.

It surely isn’t what you’re expecting her to say. You think she’s going to say she’s gotten enough of you, or she just couldn’t handle having someone like you around. Hell, you were even beginning to think she was trying to cover up all her roots here and start somewhere else.

“I always have been…from the moment I fucking laid eyes on you, I knew you weren’t good for me…you’re too good for me” she continues, her eyes fluttering open as she finally stares down into yours. You can finally look into yours as you blink away the tears that are pooling in your eyes and blurring your vision, and it allows you to see the pain in her eyes, just how much she’d been struggling with all of this.

“It isn’t even your blood…it made it worse, yes…but just being around you is like…it’s like a fucking drug to me. You give me this feeling that I can’t…I can’t even begin to describe how fucking euphoric you make me feel” each of her words sounds like a plea, a plea for you to let her go, to unhand her from the death grip you have on her.

“And suddenly I’m always in your apartment, and you’re offering yourself to me and it’s like a dream come true and I feel like a fucking monster when I’m on top of you, sucking you dry of your fucking blood” it’s her turn to start pacing, running her hands through her hair as she settles one of her hands on her hip, she moves slower than you were, simply voicing the struggles she’s seemed to have with you from the moment you met.

She finally turns towards you, and she’s slowing make her way to where you’ve been standing this entire time. When she’s right back where she was, stood right in front of you, she takes your hand into hers ever so gently. It’s enough to make you flinch, how cold she is in contrast to your hot skin. She sighs, bringing your hand up to cradle her cheek, and her eyes flutter shut, nearly rolling back as she presses a soft kiss to your palm.

“I’m not strong enough for you…I don’t think I ever will be” she finally admits, and it’s like she’s not only admitting it to you, but to herself as well.

You hold back a whine as she kisses your palm, her lips so soft, so gentle with you.

“Then…then don’t be…why can’t you just let things happen” you sigh out as you stare up at her, in awe as the girl leaned into your touch as if it were her life line.

You aren’t even entirely sure what you’re asking her for, what this so called ‘thing’ is that she won’t let happen. Is it the feeding you’re alluding to? An act of true platonic kindness? Or are you asking for more, are you begging for something that Ellie has deprived you both of for the sake of the greater good?

Both you and Ellie have these same questions running through your minds.

She chuckles dryly against your skin, shaking her head as her hand gives your wrists a gentle squeeze.

“You aren’t even sure what it is you’re asking for…not from someone like me” she admits, eyes opening as she finally looks down at you again.

“I can’t…give you the things you deserve. I’m not capable of being the perfect person for you, not when I am what I am” her words are like venom on her tongue, the girl utterly disgusted with the monster that she became against her own will, the hell that she was forced to live over and over again with no foreseeable end.

“The only thing I can do, is take from you…I take and take and take….” Her words trail off, a soft frown on her lips before she finally looks at you once again.

“Until I’ve taken everything that you have…and there is no more of you to offer” she whispers out, as if the mere thought of a world without you pains her so much to say, she barely wants to say it.

You lick your lips, your eyes searching hers before you quickly shake your head.

“Do you want me? The same way that I want you?” You question carefully, fearful of what it is that she might say, worried that you’d been reading things entirely wrong, even after Ellie basically confessed how utterly obsessed she is with you.

She smirks softly, humming lowly as she gently brings your hand down to her lips, pressing another gentle kiss to it.

“It’s like I’ve waited my entire life for you, baby….saying that I want you would be an understatement” she chuckles out softly.

And you aren’t entirely sure how it even gets to this point, because you marched over to Ellie’s apartment with a purpose, that purpose being to yell at her and get the answers you deserved. But suddenly you’re standing in front of her, and your heart is exploding with so many different emotions and feelings, all of them for Ellie, and she’s just confessed to you that she wants you like you want her.

And you have no choice, but to kiss her.

It catches Ellie off guard, a soft whine leaving her lips as accepts your lips with gratitude, her arms moving down to drape along your waist as she pulls you closer.

It’s everything she’s ever dreamt it would be. Your lips soft and sweet against her own, your skin so warm and inviting, making her drink you up, fueling her with the warmth she’s lacked since the day she died. But despite how good it feels, she knows this is wrong, and it goes against everything she said she’d do for your sake.

Ellie breaks way first, watching as you struggle to catch your breath from the intense kiss. She’s quick to stop you from leaning in again, her hand cupping your face as she stares into your eyes.

“Angel…we can’t…I told you, I’m no good for you” she sighs out, the words paining her to even say.

You give her a soft pout, your arms wrapping around her shoulders loosely as you press your warm body against hers.

“I trust you Ellie….I know that you’d never hurt me” you sigh out softly as you stare into her eyes, your hand coming up to tuck a strand of her soft hair behind her ear.

“We don’t have to do the blood thing…but I just…can’t we just give us a try?” Your eyes are wide as you speak, eager to feel Ellie’s lips against yours again, even if for a moment. You don’t even take into consideration that she could say no, that she could turn you around and throw you out of her apartment without another word, doubling down on what she said she’d do with you.

But as Ellie said before, she’s just too fucking weak for you.

And hearing you ask for it, ask for her, it has her stomach in knots, and she feels like no matter what it is you ask her, she couldn’t possibly say no to you.

“What are you doing to me…” she sighs softly before she leans in to kiss you again, reciprocating the passion and heat that you gave her mere moments ago. You whine against her, your hands sliding back to tug at her hair, keeping her close as your lips moves against hers, your warm tongue sliding against hers.

“Missed you so much…” you sigh against her, and it makes Ellie groan softly as she nods, hands sliding down to grip your waist as she walks you back towards her bedroom, lips never leaving yours.

“Missed you more than anything, angel” she mumbles against your lips as she presses her palm against her bedroom door behind you, pushing it open and leading you further inside.

Ellie’s bedroom smells like her. It’s dark, and cold but oh so comforting. You practically sigh against her lips when you feel her laying your body down against her black silk sheets, the expensive material like butter on your skin. It makes your senses go in overdrive, Ellie’s hands caressing your skin, roaming around your body as her tongue rubs against yours in a dirty, passionate kiss.

“Don’t know how long I’ve waited to have you like this…” she sighs softly, her lips breaking away from yours to kiss along your jaw, down to your throat. You don’t miss the way Ellie kisses the now faded marks of her teeth on your neck, licking the skin softly before she sucks into it, sure to leave dark marks in the morning.

“Missed marking you up baby….” She hums against you, drinking in the sweet moans that leave your mouth, the sound alone like music to her ears.

Your mind is fuzzy, almost blank besides the thoughts of Ellie that stood in the forefront of your brain. It was like she was filling you up entirely, making you almost overwhelmed with her. Her scent, her cold skin, her soft hands, all of it was almost too much, a combination of sensory overload that kissed your skin so deliciously.

Soon she’s kissing down your body, practically worshiping her as her lips work on your soft skin. Her hands are pushing up your t-shirt, kissing your stomach and your ribcage until she’s tugging you up a bit to skillfully slip your shirt over your head. You’re bare before her, her lips matching onto your pebbled nipples as her tattooed hands work on your soft shorts, tugging them down your legs.

You don’t miss the way her tongue swirls around your nipple before letting go with a pop, lips moving up to nip at your collar bone with her flat teeth. Hard enough to leave a mark, but gentle enough to not break skin.

You giggle softly, bending your legs back to help as she tugs your shorts and panties off. She’s slotting herself between your legs, humming softly as she gives you a smirk.

“Something funny baby?” She questions before leaning in to press another kiss to the corner of your lips. You nod, a dreamy smile on your lips as you bring your hand down to tug at the hem of Ellie’s t-shirt.

“Seems like old habits never die, that’s all….need this off” you huff out softly, fingers fumbling between the hem of her t shirt and the waistband of her sweats.

Ellie chuckles at how eager you are before she nods, pulling back to tug her shirt off before she rolls over a bit to pull off her sweats and underwear as well before she makes her way back between your legs, towering over you as she crawls into you like a predator would its prey.

And it leaves your pussy soaking wet, because it’s better than you could’ve ever imagined. Ellie’s tits are pebbled similarly to yours, tattoos littering her pretty skin, muscles so beautiful they could make your mouth fucking water.

You’d always seen Ellie for the beauty she possessed…but this? This was so much more different.

It made your head fucking spin.

You whined softly as you practically tug her into her by her shoulders, moaning softly at the feeling of her boobs squishing against yours as your mouth attacks her in a needy kiss.

“Want you…” you sigh softly against her as your hand slides down between the both of you, cupping her pussy. You feel Ellie suck in a sharp breath at the feeling of your warm fingers against her sopping wet core, and she gives you an eager nod before rolling over, her strong hands gripping your thighs and taking you with her as she forces you to straddle her.

Being on top of Ellie is just as good as being under her, almost better in all honesty. The lighting in her bedroom is dim, but you can just make out her features with the moonlight that spills in through her big windows, and the moody lights she has set up along her walls. You don’t even realize it because you’re too busy gawking at her, but she lifts her leg up a bit and easily slots you down so that your pussy is right against hers, the feeling making you moan softly.

“You’re so pretty Ellie…” you practically sigh out. It makes Ellie moan softly, and she swears the sound of you calling her pretty is enough to bring her back to life, reversing the effects of her undead state.

“Fuck…can’t say those things to me baby…you’re gonna…Jesus..ruin me” she struggles to get out as she grips your hips, forcing you to roll your hips so that your clit and her clit bumps against each other.

Your eyes flutter shut when you feel it. It’s so fucking wet, and soft, and it’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before. Sure you’d done it with other girls before, but this just feels…it almost feels like….

“Like you were fucking made for me princess” Ellie grits out, her teeth caging her words in as she fucks you down onto her pussy, practically using you for both hers and your pleasure.

You’re too far gone to pick up on it, too indulged in the feeling of Ellie’s strong hands gripping your thighs so deliciously, sure to leave marks in their shape when you both wake up in the morning.

Your back is arching almost painfully, your hand gripping her thigh as you find the rhythm Ellie has set for you, finding the perfect spot and keeping it there as you drive both you and her to your orgasms.

“I’m…Ellie you feel so good…you’re gonna make me cum” you squeak out, eyebrows furrowed as you finally look down at the girl beneath you, only to find that she’s just as much of a mess as you are. Her hair is messy and her lips look so pouty and kissable. It’s hard to make out, but her fanged teeth are pressing into her lips, and you’re sure it’s the sexiest thing you’ve seen in your entire life.

She gives you an encouraging nod, one of her hands coming to your ass and kneading it harshly before giving it a firm spank, the sinful noise echoing off the walls of her pristine bedroom.

“I know baby…I know…come on, want you to cum with me…that’s it…that’s my good girl” her praises make your chest burn, and it leaves knots in your stomach. It only drives you further, your hips moving faster as they roll against Ellie’s, desperately chasing both hers and your orgasm.

“Ellie…Ellie I’m…I’m gonna-“ you cry out, back arching as you grip her thighs quickly, feeling your own shake as your orgasm begins washing over you.

Ellie catches it right before it happens, the girl quickly sitting up and wrapping her arms around your body, pressing your chest against hers as she pulls you down to kiss her passionately, her own orgasm washing over her like a fucking train.

Your bodies are so in tune, so in sync that your moans almost mix to create a symphony that can only be described as love, total and unconditional love as her arms keep you close, as if stopping you from running away from her, from the feeling she gives you. Her lips are working against yours as you breath hard, struggling to catch your breath in the sloppy kiss.

You’re a whining mess, your poor pussy far too sensitive to deal with the amount of pleasure that Ellie brought to you, all of it washing over you like an intense sea of euphoria, nearly drowning you as you held onto the girl with weak hands.

She knows you’re weak, because she’s pulling you down to rest your warm body against her cool sheets, all while keeping her cool body pressed against yours to bring you back down to earth with her.

“That’s it baby…I know….did so good for me…” she sighs softly as she leaves gentle kisses against your cheeks and eyes, watching as the aftermath of your orgasm slowly pulls you to the depths of sleep, all of it too much on your body.

“My beautiful girl…my girl…my girl…” she hums out, almost like a song as she watches you cling to her in your sleep, soft hums and huffs leaving your lips, all of which makes Ellie smile adoringly at you as she holds you while you sleep.

And even while you’re settling into one of the deepest sleeps you’ve ever experienced, you don’t miss the soft kisses against your lips and cheeks, all paired with the constant, non stop praises from Ellie.

You especially don’t miss the way she leans in settles against the pillow next to you, mumbling the softest, sweetest words to you as her hands caressing your naked body.

“I love you, pretty girl..”

[respectthepetty]

The Loyal Pin - Episode 6

The first reason I loved this episode was the fact that this episode began with the girls not only switching patterns (floral vs. lines) but also switching positions.

The second reason I loved this episode was Prik being extra by making noises and motions just to let Pin know that she knew what the lesbians were doing, and it wasn't sleeping.

And the third reason I loved this episode was THE SEX!

Pin and Anin kissing each other wherever and whenever is the kind of romantic storytelling I want to see!

And Pin and Anin having sex wherever and whenever is the kind of historical GL storytelling I want to see.

But as happy as I am that Pink Person Pin wore purple to combine her and Blue Beauty Anin's color,

And that they went on a a little date that paralleled the date that they had before Anin left for England the first time,

There are still color-coded forces (unintentionally) standing between them.

So even though these color-coded girls are in love

And having great sex about it,

Other people will continue to be whole ass problems for them!

(Not Pranot though. He sits at the same table with Prik since they are the only two people who seem to already support queer rights and wrongs!)

Because Anin's color-coded brother is being a big problem!

Anon has been consistently red color-coded, but Anin's oldest brother, Anantawut, who was once blue like her, stayed entirely brown this episode.

Which could be an issue if it means he'll become more traditional, conservative, and predictable.

And although I don't think Pin's mom ever means any harm, she is the epitome of femininity and womanhood.

She can cook. She can clean. She can manage an entire compound of servants all while looking docile, so as much as I love that Pin received the ruby set from Anin's mom for her birthday,

It feels like the jewelry is the first real step into chaining down Pin into a traditional role of womanhood like her mother since this came after the conversation about Pin and Anin needing to get married sooner rather than later.

Normally, red would be passion and heart, which is nice that Anin decided to put red berries on Pin's cake to show her she loved Pin.

But Pin lost her color a bit this episode when she became depressed that Anin was leaving again. Only the tiniest bit of pink lingered at the edge of her dress.

So I think her mother will be even more adamant that Pin get married so she will be too preoccupied with her husband and (new color) to dwell on her best friend being gone, but I think there is an ally in our royal midst!

Anantawut's new wife also seems like the epitome of femininity and womanhood because she can cook, clean, and take care of her prince.

But when I look closer, she is wearing pink AND blue.

And at the lunch where marriage is discussed, she is, once again, wearing pink and blue with a purple skirt (pictured above)

So even though Blue Beauty Anin doesn't have control of her circumstances now.

And neither does Pink Person Pin (who did not deserve to be left without a goodbye!)

I have faith that someone in this family will be able to support the girls when the times come because Prik can't be the only person in this house I respect.

Right?

[tealottie]

What are your headcanons about Della?

I have so many, but tbh my favorite headcanons have to do with her having PTSD - so i can't promise this will be a fun post

MASTERLIST OF DELLA HEADCANONS BELOW:

Appearance:

Scars from the Moon

One across her beak on left side

Scars on her arms and legs

Other markings

Stretch marks especially on her tummy and butt

A few stretch marks on her chest and thighs

Freckles on her beak (because she had triplets and ducks IRL sometimes get freckles after pregnancy)

Other

Chubby pear shape

DD cup size

Squishy belly

Big eyes

Fluffy unkempt feathers (she's bad at preening)

Thin hair (also bad at taking care of it)

Short beak

Queer Headcanons:

Homoromantic

Bisexual

Prefers to just call herself a lesbian

Ciswoman (doesn't mind they/them pronouns and probably finds it entertaining if she's referred to as he/him)

Supports all of her queer babies

She also does not actively seek out romance, but she isn't offput by the idea entirely

Mental Health and Neurodiverse Headcanons:

PTSD

Hates being alone at any given moment and had to ask Donald if she could room with him in the houseboat for a few months

Genuinely cannot look at her reflection and will be needing exposure therapy

Does not like the feeling of movement underwater because it reminds her of the moon's gravity

Terrified that she'll never be fully capable of being a mom because of the 10 years she missed

Cringes at any moon or space themed items now - sometimes triggers her on a bad day or if she looks at them for too long

Her hair being too long is a trigger for her, so she always keeps it shoulder length or above

She ALWAYS feels cold even if her body temperature is normal and sometimes it drives her crazy

Lots of nightmares about what-ifs - what if it was my kids instead of me, what if it was my brother instead of me, what if i didnt have oxychew, what if i never met the Moonlanders, etc etc etc

The taste of black licorice will genuinely send her spiraling, and because it lingers - it wrecks her for days (she hates similar flavors such as rootbeer)

Finds a lot of joy in warm places so she now loves to be out in the sun

Had a period of time where she wasn't really talking with Penumbra because of the severity of her triggers/ptsd

Both finds peace in dead silence, but it also brings her back to the moon as well - she has a very complex relationship with isolation

Prefers silver over gold (even though she doesn't wear jewelry, she likes silver on others and silver on things such as zippers and buttons)

Spent quite a few years terrified of flying after the horror of her own trauma set in, but it threw her into a big depression since piloting is her passion

Hates taking care of her stump because she doesn't like taking her prosthetic leg off - she sees it as her own, so she hates taking it off even though she knows she needs to when sleeping or showering

She has a hard time looking at her stump and scars because on one hand; sick as hell battle wounds, but on the other; damn was that the worst time in my entire life

Depression and Anxiety

Even before crashlanding on the moon, she dealt with depression and social anxiety

She has a bit of a hard time keeping her room tidy and taking care of herself, but she's phenomenal at putting other people first

Feels as though she's not attractive enough

Wants to be a ray of sunshine in other peoples' lives

She's very scared that she won't be enough for people and therefore she must put 110% into everything she does for others

ADHD and Autism

Her sensory issues tend to directly conflict with her PTSD issues - like she hates silence because of the moon, but sometimes she gets overstimulated by noise and needs the silence or alone time

She does not sleep until her body physically passes out because the change in activity is hard for her to deal with

Goes insane if she feels understimulated because her brain begins to shut down and she dissociates

Many, many stims (sometimes doubles as grounding with PTSD): bouncing her leg, various hand motions, feeling the fabric of her clothes, physical affection with her loved ones, playing with the tightness of her prosthetic (loosening and then tightening it over and over), shaking her head to feel her hair around her shoulders (and solidifying that what she's feeling is earth gravity)

Really hard time understanding social cues that makes her come across as rather ditzy

Special interest in aircraft technology and was a top student at her flight school

Love/Hate relationship with reading because if she enjoys what she's reading she gets invested, but if she's understimulated, the words jumble together in her mind

Not good at math for a similar reason

Fish are a huge sensory nightmare for her; the scales, the smell, the taste, etc

Is generally pretty sensory-seeking, but has a few Hard Nos on textures (such as slimy scales)

Other:

I headcanon Della having compulsive sexual behavior disorder, and her libido especially spiked after being on the moon for 10 years, and it makes her feel really gross at times

Due to said hypersexuality, she gets intrusive thoughts that piss her off

Because of the moon not really having a clear indicator of night and day, Della lost her circadian rhythm and struggles with a Hell combination of non-24 and ADHD insomnia

The lack of general sleep makes it hard for her to lose weight and so she's insecure about that

Physical Disabilities:

Because she was on the moon for so long, the zero gravity and lack of proper breathable oxygen took a huge toll on her, physically

She developed really bad asthma and will likely be recovering from it for the rest of her life

Her lungs can only intake so much oxygen at a time, so she also struggles with shortness of breath

Upon returning to earth, her body was really broken down from the cold atmosphere - causing her to not be able to regulate her body temperature properly

Her bones were weakened upon arrival, so she has to spend years recovering physically from it

Her stump is irritated a lot because she doesn't like taking care of it properly

She owns crutches for when she needs to take breaks from her prosthetic just because of the discomfort when wearing it

She is not afraid to hit Donald with a crutch BTW

IF THERE ARE ANY OTHER SPECIFIC HEADCANONS THAT YOU ARE CURIOUS ABOUT, SHOOT ME AN ASK! <3

[sexiestpodcastcharacter]

Sexiest Podcast Character — Scripted Bracket — Round 3

Propaganda

Peter Nureyev (The Penumbra Podcast: Juno Steel):

His character is the reason the term "Homme Fatale" became a thing

Homme fatale, living by the mantra of be gay, do crime. V secretive and just the right amount of flirty. Also I love him

He’s a slutty master thief who slept with a detective he went on 1 date(murder case) with and then fell ass over tea kettle in love. Literally can’t think of anything sexier

Antigone Funn (Wooden Overcoats):

An extremely agoraphobic mortician of a local funeral home who has every disease. Nervous wreck. Makes noises when stressed. An artist at heart (her embalming fluid is imbued with the fragrance of cinnamon).

she's the goth gf of your dreams. she's an undertaker, a romance novelist, a hot air balloon pilot, and she has interiority for days

It's antigone or unfollow me

please, everyone, antigone deserves this. she ghost-wrote a wildly successful erotic novel and then faked the death of the fake author. she didn’t leave her house for 17 years except to go see horny french films every thursday. she accidentally ended up in a love triangle with a hot domme lesbian circus ringmaster and her own employee. she broke up with a doctor after one date because he didn’t respect her career (and also his parrot hated her). she experienced years of carnal yearning for her professional rival only to finally realize she was actually okay on her own. she drinks embalming fluid. she thinks of funerals as an art form. she was diagnosed with depression as an infant. she wanted to be a clown when she grew up. her hero is a historical female scientist who has a statue with her tits out. she’s been attacked by owls. a bunch of children thought she was a forest witch. the rest of the village thought she was dead. she has committed multiple counts of breaking and entering. she designed artisanal chocolates that put you in a temporary coma. she can’t eat her own chocolates because she’s allergic to everything. she attracts shadows like a magnet. she’s a woman in STEM. if you have any love in your heart for goth weirdgirls you’ll do the right thing. ANTIGONE SWEEP

GUYS PLEASE

PLEASE VOTE FOR ANTIGONE!!!!!

CMON DON’T LET MY GIRL “CANNONICALLY WANTED BY EVERYONE ON THIS ISLAND” LOSE!!!

Considering committing voter fraud for Antigone. My girl 😔

Vote Antigone because do you understand how narratively satisfying it would be if she won??? Season one? She could barely go outside her mortuary. Season four? Modeling for a sexy calendar. THE CHARACTER GROWTH!!!!!!! Nothing more sexy than that.

COME ON Y'ALL VOTE ANTIGONE. VOTE FOR MY HORNY GOTH QUEEN!!!!!

VOTE ANTIGONE OR DIE

IF YALL DONT VOTE ANTIGONE UR BLOCKED. This isn’t even a joke.

[waitmyturtles]

Love In The Big City: Reflections on the Novel, and Episodes 1 and 2 of the Television Series

(Writing this with big ups to the LITBC Book Club, led by @lurkingshan and @bengiyo -- I only wish my mom life allowed me to have participated in real time in that project! I am taking the LITBC club's lead and watching two episodes a week of this series. SPOILERS from the novel that may make their way into the series are below -- read at your peril if you're pacing yourself on the series.)

In the midst of my reading the novel version of Love In The Big City over the last two weeks, I've been posting news updates (here, here, and here) about South Korean conservatives, many of them (maybe all of them) Christian, trying to censor and prevent the airing of the subsequent drama series, which dropped this week on TVING and Viki.

I want to note how important and ironic it is, macro-systemically, to note that Christianity has such a looming presence outside of the story itself, with "protestors" (bigots) leveraging "Christian values" as a means of trying to keep this already-brilliant show from being aired.

And if you're pacing on the series like I am, and you *haven't* read the novel, then you've only gotten a little taste for how Christian zealotry, among other issues, has and will affect Go Young throughout this story.

But I'm getting ahead of myself: when I picked up the novel, I was more familiar with the noise and drama associated with the television series than I was with the story itself. I'm going to talk a little about my reactions to the novel, and then offer thoughts on the first two episodes.

I read Proust's In Search of Lost Time (yep, all of it) in my freshman year of college, and Hemingway's The Sun Also Rises two years after. I felt the power of both of these stories strongly in Park Sang-young's novel, from the impact that memories and depression can have on a young man, to the permanence of medical conditions that can drive a young man's life towards otherwise unexplored cliffs of grief and pain.

Even reading a synopsis of In Search of Lost Time is a monumental feat, so let me just say that I felt Proust's madeleine-driven devices of memory, within the novel, from Young's frozen blueberries to the chill of the Marlboro Reds in the freezer. The impact of Young being really, really alone, as connected to the empty freezer and the dwindling blueberries after Jaehee's (Mi-ae in the series) wedding, caught me in a hole of loneliness that I felt for Young -- well before I knew enough of his backstory to be truly devastated.

I'm jumping ahead of myself vis à vis the series, but I also felt Proust even more heavily as I was reading about Philosopher Hipster Doofus Hyung, and I threw back to @lurkingshan as I was reading the book, "goddamn it, we are in yet another circle of hipster doom, huh," well before I learned about the medical turning point this story hinges on. Young's incessant attraction to that POS had me thinking about Proust's narrator's simultaneous incessant attraction and disdain for his companion, Albertine, who is a lesbian in early 20th-century France. While the story between the narrator and Albertine is ultimately a devastating one, Proust's narrator winds through the devastation with an equally devastating arm's-length distance, continually avoiding the true depth of pain that his obsessions would have otherwise rendered.

For me, it's such an apropos comparison to think about as we see Young, time and time again, rationalize the avoidance he has to commitment, all while throwing his energy into the relationships he's able to find himself in, ones that he essentially stumbled upon and never instigated.

The pain of his loneliness only grows as he grows into adulthood, and that, paired with his medical reveal, left me with a boulder in my stomach by the time I finished the novel.

Because I'm me (intergenerational trauma auntie), as soon as I finished the book, I couldn't help but think about Young's own boulders that he silently shouldered -- the thought that Young's medical Kylie would rear its head as a means of aiding Young in rationalizing his own assumptions about wanting vs. deserving long-lasting love, and his habit of taking commitment too lightly, even in the context of an already-established relationship with Gyu-ho.

But I also consider the lifelong trauma he suffered vis à vis his mother as an equally heavy boulder: the fact that Young absolutely internalized his mother's disdain for him as a gay man, his mother trying to "correct" his sexuality through conversion therapy, and then seemingly seeing past her son's reality, horrifically ignoring the emotional development of her son. Besides physical abuse, you couldn't do better than Young's mother in permanently psychologically traumatizing a young man who will already face obstacles as a queer individual in a highly conservative society.

All of this combined rendered me unsurprised -- but, of course, still equally devastated -- by Young's eventually pinball-style life, jumping from menial job to increasingly flippant flings.

What we are treated to in the novel are the thoughts that Young can put together as he steps back and assesses his life, especially at the crushing end of the novel. On the surface, someone on the street could absolutely write off Young as another aloof and aging hipster, disconnected with the world; but we know that that's not the case as Young assesses his dashed hopes for the kind of permanent love that he had once pooh-poohed.

Both Proust's narrator, and Hemingway's Jake Barnes in The Sun Also Rises, could join Young in that aloofness, and our own misreads of these men, to an extent. Not only is Barnes held back in life by a previous wartime injury (to me, this is screaming of inspiration to Park Sang Young's novel and the timing of Young's medical condition, but I'll never know if Park was directly inspired by Hemingway's book), but Barnes and Proust's narrator are also both young men growing into their adulthood, within circles of friends in impactful societies that seem to be full of intelligence and engagement, but are ultimately larded with loneliness and the pain of static ambition and conformity.

The last takeaway from the novel that I'll think about for now, one that I think is already leading beautifully into the television series, is the fallacy that we all have or had as young adults: that our youth would last forever. Young says, at the end of episode two,

"As I looked down at those blueberries, I realized that a time I had thought would last forever had come to an end."

Young has to reckon with the fact that his life, as it stands still in his early 30s, hasn't moved forward. It's only gone backwards, into deep habits of disconnection, despair, and loss. That youth itself could serve as a modality of movement for a young person to hopefully grow into a person with more potential is both heartening and brutal to consider -- especially as Young clearly could not take time in his life to take care of himself, as busy with his mother as he ends up being.

There's a lot more I'll likely say about the novel as the series unwinds, but I'm honestly still internally processing it. I'm also amazed to think that both In Search of Lost Time and The Sun Also Rises have significant connections to queer sexuality in both novels, and I just couldn't help going down this comparative literature brainrot cycle for a few minutes.

As to the first episodes of the series: what can I say? No one does it like South Korea. The acting, the cinematography, what Nam Yoon-su is bringing by way of his mere presence, let alone how he bodily channels Young's sexuality and personality. We're in prestige drama territory -- and already by episode 2, we've been taking into multiple facets of Young's internal strife, and his soon-to-be-revealed lifelong aloofness to commitment, while he still yearns for infinite love.

God, those internal contradictions, huh? In our real life, with our friends who are like that -- those friends drive us INSANE, RIGHT? Proust's narrator is SO THIS. A guy who sits in a chair and whines about what he wants, and complains even more when he HAS what he wants, because it's not perfect? He HAS Albertine at so many times, but he can't make her fully love him, because guess what, she's a lesbian, womp womp? Pick a battle, homey.

And yet. We're still devastated by Proust's narrator. Because one of his ultimate flaws is that he'll never remain still, he'll never be truly satisfied, and that conflict DOES keep him from being able to attain permanent happiness. At least we get to see him age, while we're left to wonder with Young and Jake Barnes.

I'm just too excited to see how Nam Yoon-su renders Young's own conflicts, as they simply grow, throughout his life in the series.

*****

I want to make one quick, totally unrelated note, about the airing of this series. At least to me, maybe only to me, the opening animated title cards of LITBC are really close to the imagery and symbolism of the title cards of Netflix Japan's The Boyfriend, a recent dating reality show featuring gay men in Japan trying to find permanent love. The ultimate pairing of DaiShun has been HUGE in Asia this year, with DaiShun doing fan meets across Asia, including in South Korea.

As @lurkingshan and others have emphasized: Love in the Big City is NOT a BL, it is NOT a romance. It is a deep exploration of the life of a gay man in the city of Seoul.

Inspired in part by Sex And The City? Probably. But LITBC is not nearly as flippant as SATC regarding social obstacles that its main characters face. LITBC delves painfully into the various obstacles that queer men face in Seoul, from social to medical discrimination.

The Boyfriend actually touched a lot on these obstacles as well. Some of the participants were out, but not all of them; one participant, Tae-heon, used the show itself as a means of coming out to his parents.

While some of us have seen the majority of queer content in Thailand turn very primarily towards BL romances, I still believe that Thailand can and will produce high-caliber media about queer life aside from romance, as it did in 2022's The Miracle of Teddy Bear (which I just finished this week, I'm fine, thanks for asking, devastated actually) and in other cinematic pieces. But I also want to note how incredibly refreshing it is to see Japan and South Korea also pick up this thread through The Boyfriend and LITBC, respectfully, producing content out of the usual romance loops that we've come to expect from BL media.

Anyway. If there's a connection between LITBC and The Boyfriend, with both entities talking MUCH more about holistic queer life in society, then I celebrate it, and I want more, more, more of it.

[slushie-and-skittles]

Ninjago headcannons!!

These headcannons mostly focus on the ninja's gender, sexuality, and disorders, I'll probably make a seperate post talking about their interests.

Lloyd is questioning their gender since they haven’t had much time to explore themself. They allow their peers to use he/him pronouns, but they prefer they/them pronouns (spoiler alert: Lloyd is nonbinary). Lloyd is demiromantic and demisexual; they rarely fall in love, and if they do, it’s only with someone very close. They have PTSD, OCD, BPD, and depression.

Zane is nonbinary; he likes to use he/they pronouns and doesn’t like being referred to as a man. He is pansexual and asexual. Zane’s father has autism, and he programmed Zane to have many traits similar to himself, which led to Zane having autism. Zane is sensitive to loud noises and doesn’t like being touched; he is trying to build different settings for his senses to turn off his hearing or feeling of touch when overstimulated. Zane also struggles with amnesia, due to his memory being lost multiple times and him subconsciously deleting traumatic experiences from their mind. Zane has trouble remembering basic information and recalling traumatic events from the past.

Jay is genderfluid; he is fine with any pronouns and doesn’t feel restricted by gender norms. He is bisexual. He has ADHD and generalized anxiety disorder, which he takes medication for.

Kai is transgender; he was a biological girl when he was younger and began transitioning at age 19, he uses he/him pronouns. He is bisexual. Kai suffers from bipolar 1, which he was diagnosed with and is now taking medication for.

Cole is transgender; he was a biological girl when he was younger and began transitioning at age 18, he uses he/him pronouns; he and Nya were the people to help Kai figure out he was trans. Cole is gay and suffers from PTSD and anxiety. 

Nya is Transmasculine and uses both she/her and he/him pronouns; she is not planning to transition biologically but makes an effort to look like a man if she feels like it. Nya is bisexual and has anger issues.

Pixel is biologically genderless, but she feels as if she is female. She doesn’t feel restricted to gender norms and uses she/her pronouns. She suffers from depression since she has a more challenging time feeling joy due to the way she was programmed. She is pansexual and asexual.

Wyldfyr doesn’t care about her gender; she hasn’t made an effort to assign herself a label, and she doesn’t care what other people call her. She is omnisexual and has ADHD and anger issues.

Sora is genderfluid and uses any pronouns; they are a lesbian, has autism, and suffers from depression.

Arin is cisgender; he uses he/him pronouns and doesn’t like being called a girl. He is aro/ace and suffers from anxiety, PTSD, and depression.

Geo hasn’t thought about his gender since he never felt restricted by gender norms, and he just allowed people to refer to him as whatever they liked. He believes he is genderfluid but hasn’t put too much thought into it since he doesn’t feel the need to. He is omnisexual and suffers from anxiety and OCD.

Garmadon believes they are cisgender but secretly feels more connected with being nonbinary. They have repressed these feelings for most of their life since they were scared of the dysphoria they experienced every time someone called them a man. They are bisexual, Garmadon’s Oni form has ASPD, and struggles to feel empathy for others. However, they have slowly learned how to be kind to others after the crystalized season.

Master Wu is cisgender and a straight ally; he finds nonbinary and trans people interesting since these terms didn’t exist when he was younger. Wu strives to understand his diverse students and wants to support them in any way he can. His students are happy to answer most of his questions about gender and sexuality. Wu suffers from depression.

Misako is cisgender and a straight ally; she is slightly uncomfortable with the idea of new genders and sexualities since she doesn’t know too much about people like this. She wouldn’t fully support people with different sexualities and genders until she learned that Wu’s students were, in fact, not straight, and she started to learn more about different sexualities and genders. She is still a little uncomfortable with the whole idea but doesn’t want to be hateful toward her peers for who they are, so she makes an active effort to be as supportive as possible. 

[starlover2]

More MKulia HCs because at this point I'm pretty sure I have Rajbow/Mkulia brainrot MK just gives me cat vibes. She makes cat activation noises(Mrrps) when kissed on the head. Julia takes advantage of this the second she learns it because she thinks it's cute Julia and MK get the heart pendants later(Mk stole them) and start the podcast anyway MK is a nonbinary(She/they) lesbian, Julia is a demi-romantic lesbian They say 'l love you' to each other but usually in hushed whispers and in intimate moments(Like cuddling, holding onto each other, stargazing even) Theodore is MK's comfort item Some angst bc why not Julia was disowned by her parents and she lives with her aunt(I like to think Blaineley's her aunt), she tries to keep in contact with her sister MK has mild depression and has had some episodes off screen. It's worried Julia a bit(and it has worried her family too)

[blacksapphicguide]

Sex Education (TV series)

2010s TV series. 4 seasons (Completed) Drama, romance.

Plot points:

High school and 6th form

Sex education

Personal identity

Sexuality

Open relationships

Set in the UK

Interracial lesbian couples (secondary)

Black queer pairing (secondary)

Black sapphic characters:

Aisha [lesbian] (Alexandra James) Ola [pansexual] (Patricia Allison) Roz (Sharon Duncan-Brewster) Cal [non-binary] (Dua Saleh)

Connections:

Ola x Lily (interracial sapphic: black x white) Aisha x PK (interracial lesbian: black x asian) x Cal (black queer) Roz x Sofia (interracial lesbian: black x white)

Sex & Nudity - Severe

Kissing and making out.

Characters visible in underwear and naked.

Characters have sex with accompanying noises and movements. Limited nudity.

Nudity is generally limited to bare breasts.

Full frontal nude of a penis.

Two characters give handjobs to each other. No nudity as its viewed from behind.

Character pulls his pants down and exposes himself to a crowd. He is seen from behind, his penis visible between his legs.

Instances of vulvas seen on phone screens.

Season 3 opens up with a sex montage.

Opening scene of an episode is a montage of character masturbating. One scene where their ejaculate is visible on a car window.

Conversations about about orgasms, positions, body fluids, masturbation, pornography

Violence & Gore - Mild

Brief violent moments like fighting and bullying. Minimal blood.

Some violence toward a LGBT+ teen. Bruises, abrasions, and some bloody noses are shown on just a couple of occasions.

A character deals with self-harm in season 2 (not graphic).

A cat is crushed and killed by a falling microwave, blood is shown.

Profanity - Severe

Multiple sexual profanities such as "dick", "tits" and others.

Use of "fag" in reference to a cigarette.

Common use of fuck, shit, damn, hell, tits, cunt, cock, strap-on, spunk, jizz, hand jobs.

A girl is called slag and nympho.

Aa gay teen is called "fag."

Alcohol, Drugs & Smoking - Moderate

Underage smoking of cigarettes and weed.

The use of marijuana is present.

A character is a drug dealer, and deals pills to local teens.

Two characters smoke mushrooms and experience a lot of hallucinations.

Underage drinking and drug use is casual and frequent.

At one point, two characters are offered mushrooms and go on a "trip", but it's mostly comedic.

A character's mother is a drug addict.

Frightening & Intense Scenes - Mild

A character is sexually assaulted on a bus.

Multiple scenes of bullying.

A character gives birth to a child and almost dies.

Character experiences post-partum depression.

Character gets assaulted as they are dressed in drag.

A character's parent dies and a funeral planning is shown, but the funeral is not shown.

[mask131]

Cinematic bloodlines (1)

The novel "Dracula" gave birth to many, MANY different adaptations, with several of them forming a very particular chain of works that I will call "bloodlines". And the first one actually begins with... a theater play.

In June of 1924, twelve years after the death of Bram Stoker, Dracula was adapted to the stage in Derby, by Hamilton Deane. This play was a huge success - in June of 1927 it was moved to London, and there made so much noise that by September of the same year it crossed the Atlantic and became a Broadway fame. It is from this specific play that the iconic "Dracula outfit" comes from, this evening wear, these soirée clothes with a black cape. It is also at Broadway that one particular actor would start playing Dracula, forever changing the fate of the character: the Hungarian-descendng Bela "Lugosi" Blasko, destined to become the first "face" of Dracula.

We move on to the core of this bloodline: the 1931 "Dracula" movie by Tod Browning. The first "actual" Dracula adaptation on screen, or at least the first talking movie about Dracula, and the one that immortalized Belga Lugosi in the role of the vampire count.

This movie was a huge and lasting success, and erected Dracula as a cultural icon in the American landscape. Jean Marigny wrote that one of the reasons this Dracula worked so well at the time was due to the historical context - the mix of the Great Depression's miserable effects and the inherent xenophobia of the USA, which found themselves "embodied" somehow by Dracula, this sickly and cruel "foreigner", this diseased and malevolent "other" which brought evil into the world. From 1931 to the end of World War II, roughly, American cheap literature and pulp fiction saw a boom of Dracula copies and imitations, so many vampires with Germanic or Slavic names that all were more-or-less subtle personifications of the political threats the USA had to deal with - Bolshevism or Nazism.

Though, again by Marigny's word, this "xenophobic" and "political" reading of Dracula does echo wonderfully one of the elements that made the original novel a success - as beyong a "good versus evil" and "vice versus virtue" battle, the Dracula novel also presented the vampire as a threat coming from a far-away country on the backwards, peasant, superstitious and ancient Eastern depths of Europe, coming into the harmonious and civilized order of Britain to cause trouble and disrupt peace... Perfect to please the inherent xenophobia of Victorian England. Though, it also should be pointed out that the novel, while adhering seemingly to this inherent bias, still was quite subversive - for example by having the Count be clearly more powerful and more prepared than the protagonists, who are all somehow weak or mediocre embodiments of the Victorian society, outmatched and unarmed for quite a long time against this clearly far superior being that is the vampire...

Also, this movie solidified the idea of a younger Dracula - as unlike in the novel, Lugosi's vampire doesn't start as an old man with a long white mustache...

The 1931 Dracula led to the development of what we know today as the "Universal Horror", a series of horror movies developed by Universal Pictures and which formed the first big "cinematic family" of the horror world. In this setting, "Dracula" got a sequel: "Dracula's Daughter" in 1936, very very loosely inspired by both "Dracula's Guest" and "Carmilla" (the two most prominent depictons of a female vampire at the time). The movie is about, as you can guess, Dracula's daughter who is trying to use all the methods she can, both supernatural and scientific, to break the vampirism curse she inherite from her father... The movie is also well-known for playing with the lesbian subtext of Carmilla, reusing it on screen in a Dracula context.

The third part of the unofficial trilogy came in 1943: "Son of Dracula". This is not actually about the literal son of Dracula, unlike "Dracula's Daughter". Rather it is about count Dracula moving not into London but into New-Orleans to spread his vampirism (was it the first time Dracula was depicted arriving in America? I think it might be...). In fact the other working titles for this movies were "The Modern Dracula" and "The Return of Dracula", all much more faithful to what the movie is actually about. This picture is also notorious for being the first time the "Alucard" trick was used in vampire fiction (note that Dracula is not played here by Bela Lugosi, but rather by the other giant of horror Lon Chaney Junior)

After this initial trilogy forming a very loose story (continuity was not the main concern of Universal movie-makers), the Universal Horror entered the era any big franchise enters at one point - crossover times! With "House of Frankenstein" in 1944, and "House of Dracula" in 1945, both about events gathering under one same roof Dracula, the creature of Frankenstein and the Wolf Man, the three iconics of the Universal Horror.

Then we entered the era of parodies, and the Universal Dracula ended up with the 1948 parody "Abbott and Costello meet Frankenstein".

This is the end for the old "classic" Universal line. There is actually more down it, Universal didn't stop its vampire movies there, but I'll keep it for another post, because I want to conclue this post with three other movies.

Bela Lugosi is quite famously THE Dracula - and many believe that he was the only actor for Dracula in the Universal movies. Yet, as said above, he wasn't present in all of them - Son of Dracula, for example, was without him. Rather, this idea comes from the fact that, after playing Dracula on stage and on screen, Lugosi ended trapped in the role and type-casted as a vampire. He notoriously played in an unofficial trio of vampire movies which solidifed his reputation as "the vampire actor".

The first was another Tod Browning production made not so long after the original Dracula: 1935's Mark of the Vampire (or Vampires of Prague), which was strongly inspired by a silent horror movie currently lost, "London after Midnight". There, Lugosi played a "count Mora" who causes mysterious deaths in Prague with his daughter Irena. (And in this angle you could consider this movie a sort of unofficial rival to Universal's "Dracula's Daughter").

Followed in 1943 "The Return of the Vampire" by Lew Landers, which was basically trying to be an unofficial, unlicensed sequel to the Universal 1931's Dracula, even having Lugosi play the main vampire haunting London (Armand Tesla). This picture also contains a copy of Universal's Wolf Man in the person of Andréas the werewolf.

The last one is another parody in the line of the Abbott and Costello movie (in fact it was heavily inspired by it): the 1953 John Gilling's movie "Mother Riley Meets the Vampire", where the vampire is titled Van Houssen and plans to dominate the world by... building a robot army. Well... it was the 50s.

All of these lead to the treatment of Lugosi' vampire typecasting as both his legacy and his curse - to the point that when he was buried, he demanded it was in his Dracula costume...

[dawnwillriseandsetoneday]

HIYA my names Dawn!!! I’m very new to tumblr so please bare with me here -_-

I love S&D (Springtrap and deliah!) (I do not support the creator!!!)

I love fnaf!

Sundrop and moondrop fan for LIFEEEEE

I semi like tsams kinda grew out of it

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Triggers:S/h or sewer slide. Gunshot noises and screaming!

Pronouns she/her (maybe they/them)

I’m a lesbian and have a Gf!!!

Please don’t be a weirdo I just want friends with the same interests as me and I wanna post art!

(SPRINGTRAP AND DELIAH FANS PLEASE FRIEND ME IM LONELY!!!)

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If you don’t like S&D in general and wanna fight me even if I don’t support the creator just please step off my page! Thank youuuuu!

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I hope we can all get to know eachother and I am so very excited to see what this funky app has in store for me!

Also!!! Tw for my page it will most likely include: blood,gore,scary stuff, depression and possible sewer slide if I’m feeling angsty.

Anyways that’s all hope to speak more to you gremlins but until then Dawnie out! Cya!!!

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[squid-ink-symphony]

f1sh and chips headcanons?

IVE BEEN PREPARING FOR THIS MOMENT MY WHOLE LIFE

HARMONY:

Nonbinary and kinda indifferent on their gender. Goes by She/They. Doesn't really care if you use other pronouns for them tho.

Aromantic and a lesbian. Is still ok with labeling a relationship as dating even if she doesn't experience romantic love the same way as other people.

Autistic, and doesn't always function super well as an adult on her own. But she's doing her best.

Collects stuffed animals and small toys.

Likes cute things, but some people would label their definition of cute as weird.

Loves bright colors. Crank that saturation up!

Very blunt.

Gets along pretty well with her bandmates. They aren't SUPER close but they are friends.

Knows she is different. Doesn't care. It probably used to bother them more when they were younger, but now she has come to terms with it.

House is very messy.

People are just drawn to her, she doesn't particularly like it.

A lot of people think that because she is blunt and speaks her mind that she doesn't ever lie and take everything she says at face value. He is very capable of lying and will do so for various reasons if needed. Or sometimes just cuz spreading misinformation is funny. Will tell you the sky is bright green with no hesitation and a deadpan expression.

Depressed. Is on medication for it and handles it ok ish...

Video game addict. You can usually find her at home in her pajamas playing some new game surrounded by empty instant ramen cups.

Mostly enjoys creative or cute games like pokemon, animal crossing, or minecraft. Doesn't play them often, but she is the absolute best at fighting games. Could beat anyone blindfolded. Is good at a lot of hard games, but doesn't really like that kind of stuff.

Plays a lot of things as they come out and probably has a blog where she reviews them.

Knows every skip and speedrun strat ever.

Likes platformers, especially 2d ones.

Collects old nintendo consoles/games.

Stims a lot with any object nearby. Likes to play with her bracelets a lot. Will just pick up random things and fidget with them.

Seems to be tired a lot, has bags under her eyes. Stays up late a lot but doesn't mind the lack of energy.

Very clumsy and has poor motor controls for a lot of things. Has to take frequent breaks when playing games or music. Gets hurt a lot bumping into random objects.

Issues with her wrists have been a problem for most of her life due to her hobbies, and she is surprisingly good at taking care of them nowadays. Used to not care but then some serious injuries happened and she realized she couldn't afford to do that.

DEDF1SH:

Bigender! He/She/They probably. Would maybe be open to neos if he found the right ones.

Demiromantic, Bi, and Asexual. Both Acht and Harmony are aspec(not for any reason what no i'm not biased as an aroace person noooo-)

When first getting out of the metro he was VERY malnourished and had a hard time eating food. He has a lot of texture issues and finds most foods unbearable to put in her mouth.

Has since gained her weight back and is looking more healthy.

Is very sensitive to sunlight, and burns very easily even in normal weather with minimal exposure. This is part of the reason she spends so much time alone indoors.

Eyes are also very sensitive to light after being sanitized and living in the deep for so long. This is why he wears sunglasses everywhere.

Is also autistic like harmony. (again, as an autistic person i am in no way biased towards headcanoning characters as autistic ok?) Is sensitive to sounds and wears noise canceling headphones a lot.

Goes nonverbal if overstimulated.

Doesn't talk that much, is more the type to say as few words as possible to get their sentence across.

Likes eating cereal with no milk. It's one of their favorite snacks.

LOVES fruit. They are that meme of the person covered in mango juice.

Just like harmony, his face isn't very expressive. But while harmony always looks like she's daydreaming, Acht often looks angry. This is especially true when she has her glasses on since you can't see her eyes.

Really likes fashion. Likes very femme alternative stuff specifically.

Is already naturally tall, and wears heels everywhere. Towers over most other octolings/inklings.

There are many lasting effects from the sanitization. Including physical and mental symptoms. Acht is slowly recovering tho!

Can play piano, just doesn't. Doesn't remember where they learned to, but it makes them feel slightly sad to play it.

Has amnesia due to the sanitization. Can remember things like skills, but not where they learned them or from who. Doesn't remember much of her past. Doesn't remember much family or friends either. Can picture some blurry faces, but not names or how they knew each other.

Tartar told her about her decision to be sanitized, and she has no choice but to have taken his word for why she decided to due so as she has no memory of it.

Has a hard time adjusting to life on the surface.

Has some trauma surrounding medical equipment, and doesn't like to go to doctors.

I've always Acht having known Marina before coming to the surface, but with Side Order confirming they know each other somehow i will wait to flesh that out until we get more info.

Is confident and somewhat social(especially compared to Harmony) but needs a lot of time to recharge their batteries after being around others.

ParuF1sh:

They both like to make music, and often make silly little songs together. Acht likes to take whatever Harmony hums and turn it into short songs.

Both of them don't sleep much. Harmony doesn't like to because she prefers to spend her time on hobbies n such instead. She also has insomnia, but since she doesn't like sleeping it doesn't really bother her TOO much. Acht on the other hand has issues sleeping due to frequent nightmares. She ends up having terrifying nightmares of her time with tartar or things she can't fully remember from before she was sanitized. Harmony is always there to comfort him when he wakes up sweating and frightened.

Both of them are very picky about food and so their pantries end up being stuffed with lots of their prefered safe foods.

Acht tries to push himself to leave his apartment in splatsville from time to time to avoid being totally disconnected from the world because that's what she did when she first got to the surface and it made her very depressed. On one of those trips Acht ended up visiting Hotlantis because he was just exploring various shops. He really liked the vibes of the shop and the wide variety of items that rotated frequently had him coming back. This is where the two of them first met.

At first Harmony and Acht didn't even notice each other despite Acht becoming a regular to come buy and look at weird little items. But eventually after having to check Acht out so many times she finally started to pay attention to what Acht was buying and noticed they had similar tastes. Then one day Harmony struck up a conversation with Acht and they became friends from there.

I think they are both poly and wouldn't mind if their partner dated someone else. But neither of them have another partner right now.

While they both may struggle with a lot of things they help each other out and manage to get through life ok.

It took a bit for Acht to get back to making music after getting out of the metro.

They like to watch ghibli movies while cuddling for a lot of their dates. They will watch all of them and then just start over with the first one again. I think the movies are comfort media for them. Harmony's favorite movie is Spirited Away and Acht's favorite is Kiki's Delivery Service.

Acht chills with Harmony's fish a lot i think.

Neither of them know how to cook.

Harmony leaves her work spaces very messy, but Acht keeps hers VERY neat.

Acht and Harmony both take surprisingly long to get ready and pick out outfits, but Acht takes much longer than Harmony.

They do a lot of parallel play where they just sit in silence and do their own thing.

Acht hangs out at Hotlantis with Harmony a lot and just keeps their headphones on and chills.

Acht also runs the store when Harmony isn't there.

They both listen to a lot of video game osts and it's probably what Harmony keeps playing in the store as well.

Acht has asked why Harmony doesn't stream playing games, and Harmony just doesn't wanna. She would rather just post reviews.

They swap whos the little spoon depending on the day.

Both of them have terrible sleep schedules.

The first time Acht ever saw a splatfest she was enamored, and now she makes sure to always attend the concerts. Harmony insists on keeping the store open since people are everywhere during splatfests and love to shop. But the floats come through the same streets as the shop, so Acht makes sure to pull her away to watch them at least once. And Harmony loves seeing the music as well.

Neither of them really participate in turf wars. Acht is older than most players and finds it awkward to team up with random teenagers but isn't willing to put together an official team of players her age. But she still likes to take her trusty squiffer out to the practice range to keep her skills sharp. Harmony LOVES to watch her practice.

I was about to go into a whole thing of which team they would pick for each splatfest and why, but i think thats gonna have to be later/if anyone asks for it cuz it may be too long for this post lol

so yeah ill end it there for now. they are my beloveds and i could talk about them forever so feel free to ask questions/send in suggestions/talk about how you view them

here is a goofy doodle i did in 5 mins on my laptop for compensation for reading this far:

[berrybloomsys]

.⊹ °ʚ☆ɞ°.⭒₊

-ˏˋ Introduction!!ˊˎ-

We're the Berry Bloom System, or just the Bloom!

16 bodily, mostly brainmade + , we are a system and we h8 endos :3

we are diagnosed with BPD, ADHD, Anxiety, ASD (Autism), Anorexia, Bulimia, and Depression, along with some physical disabilities and disorders we don’t feel completely comfortable saying unless we’re close friends! We are medically recognized but still working on a diagnosis.

tonetags appreciated!!! we also make system things on @berrybloomsys , check it out!

​​・・・・・​​⟢

-ˏˋ. Boundaries ˊˎ-

- ask to touch (hug/kiss/hold hands)

- if we have an argument, talk about our feelings instead of yelling or something like that

- asking for space is ENCOURAGED

- sex jokes are fine (thats what she said.. etc.)

- horny jokes: no (that could be us.. etc)

✃ ┈┈┈┈ ⋆ ˚｡𖦹 ⋆｡°

⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀⁀

✶ . ࣪ ׅ Berry Bloom Sys ' 🪐

✎ collectively any/she/he/it ⎹ 16⎹

syscourse? NO! 💭

‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿‿

✶ . ࣪ ׅFrequent Fronters 🪐

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Alice

no pronouns (use name) | lesboy | 19 |

separate acc? ❌

- role: Trauma Holder, Fawn

- personality: timid, self-conscious

- likes: soft, cute things

- dislikes: mean people, things that bite

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Reggie

any pronouns | mlmgirl | 16 |

separate acc? ✅ @swrlxgrl

- role: Archivist, Lock Host

- personality: creative, anxious, happy

- likes: crochet, knitting, JELLYFISH

- dislikes: anger, yelling

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Valerie

it/bug/frog | ✨lesbian✨ | 13 |

separate acc? ❌

- role: catkid

- personality: random 👁️👄👁️

- likes: kidcore, alt tiktok

- dislikes: NORMIes

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Elise

she/her | orientation unknown | 11 |

separate acc? ❌

- role: swankid

- personality: shy, quiet, childlike

- likes: drawing, dress up

- dislikes: loud noises

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

[hecateisalesbian]

The Pride of- July?: A Final Thank You

WOW! I believe we did it! 30 Whole Days, an entire month, full of Pride! I’m honestly astounded that we were able to complete this! And I’m even more flabbergasted with how many people liked it! When i started this i thought only my mutuals and maybe one other would see this but no! This gained almost 200 notes and so many people participated in this! And I’d like to thank them all! And some even gave a few final words and talks. About Pride and Disability!

@outmaww

Thank you to Outmaww for being part of this and participating for the Lesbian Flag Day! You kicked off this project by being our first representative and I just wanna say thank you so much! 🩷

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@theosb0rnway

Thanks Oz for being there last minute when I was trying to find a representative for the Gay Flag! You pulled through and I’m very grateful for that! And for representing the Agender Flag too! Keep being awesome 🩵 💚

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@haystarlight

Thanks Sofi, I couldn’t have done this without you being an amazing bisexual disaster! And also being able to keep me in contact with Human! You are an amazing person and I hope you continue to be amazing 💜

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@solstakao

Let me start by saying that you are the best trans girl ever! 🏳️‍⚧️ I hope you get the boobs you desire lol. Thank you for representing the trans flag and being so funny! Thank you Jasmine ❤️

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@winter-socks

Not only did you represent the Trans flag, you also represented the Androsexual AND the Grayace flag! Thank you for that! And Puff even had a final closing statement about him and his disability!

“Being androsexual is a big part of my identity and what I find attractive. Androsexual means to be attracted to masculinity or just men in general, my LGBTQ+ identity has been all over the place, past few years. But I’ve found myself, I remember looking at pictures on Google that showed masculine people and I feel very attracted to them. Just something about masculine people makes me swoon over them !

I also have autism, self diagnosed. I’ve recently figured this out and have made connections between my experiences and autism through research. I have always been depressed, it seems from what my mom has told me, my family has a history of anxiety. I stim in different ways, experience noise sensitivity, have a hard time with boundaries, and more things that contribute to my autism. I hyperfixate on things for months to years, these things make me happy and people have said I’m obsessed. Which I am lol !! But it’s just how my brain works and I’m happy to have figured myself out, it all makes sense now. :)

Having autism is hard though, I can take stuff the wrong way, especially in real life where I have a hard time finding tone in people’s voices. So I end up taking them seriously. This is why tone indicators are a big thing for me and many others, we need people to use these so we don’t take them the wrong way. And I can get upset over the smallest things such as a noise I don’t like, it’s really hard. I always bring my headphones with me just in case it gets too loud. :)”

So thank you to Puff! You are a gem :) 🩵 💜 🤎

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@iridescentdiscord

Omnisexual AND DemiKING! You are amazing and supported me from the beginning! I’m very grateful you did this and for your kindness! Thank you 💙 🩵

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@mouse-in-a-piping-bag

Kat, my fellow Genderfluid, I am very glad you participated! You represented Omnisexual, Demisexual, and Genderfluid, and even created this amazing art!

Thank you Kat :} 💙 💜 🩶

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@rainbowangel110

What words can describe how amazing you are? You are one of my best and favorite mutuals and you are incredibly talented! I mean, just look at this lovely asexual art you made!

Thank you Rainbow 🌈 🩶

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@imhumanguysiswear

My first Mutual and an asexual king! I hope you can return soon to Tumblr! We all miss you! Thank you for doing this :) 🩶

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@dreamondelphinus

I Hope that you and your friend Bella have a wonderful life. Asexuals and Aromantics don’t deserve hate and definitely don’t need to be ‘fixed’. Keep being you :) 🩶

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@boilinghotsoupandcrackers

Your blog is super funny and I love seeing your posts on my dash! Thank you for representing Aroace and genderqueer! You are so cool! Thank you :) 🩶 💚 💜

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@zedleaked

You went very above and beyond with art and talking about your experience with being Aromantic! Your art looked beautiful

“To break the professional language for a sec, figuring out whether you are aromantic or not is hard, especially if you are not asexual as well. When I was figuring myself out I often found that I never really developed crushes on others and that made me feel weird since romance is so mainstream and talked about and for some reason I don’t feel these weird butterflies in my stomach or something? I guess I’m just weirdo! Sure, I can find people attractive and cute but I didn’t feel that romantic feeling. As a kid I would try and just scan other kids in my class to try and figure out if they’d be a good partner. I didn’t know that there had to be some kind of feeling to get in a relationship with someone. I just thought people would go ‘hey this person is nice and cute, I will be their partner!’ but that’s definitely not how it works. I would find it hard to differentiate romantic and platonic love because I mean… love is love…? I mean some would say romantic love is doing stuff like cuddling, holding hands, kissing, hugging… but you can also do that platonically, right? There’s just that extra step in romantic love that I just can’t see because I can’t experience that extra step. There are moments where I think I feel love but I realise that at the time I was just really eager to be their friend as I get very excited when meeting someone like me but if I really thought about if I would be in a romantic relationship with that person… the answer would probably be no. Some aromantics can feel lonely as they can’t feel romantic love and they don’t have the desire to devote their life to a person, but remember that you still have those platonic relationships and they can be just as strong if not stronger than romantic ones, nothing is better than hanging out with a really awesome friend. If you believe you’re on the aromantic spectrum but are unsure, try doing some research for yourself as there are many terms under the umbrella that may fit you! Demiromantic for example is when you only feel romantic love when close to someone or grey-romantic is when you feel fluctuating levels of romantic love but as a whole barely experience it”

Thank you Zed :) 💚

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@artkittycatty

Genderfluid Partner in Crime and Pansexual! I adore your art and your chaotic and optimistic energy! You truly brighten my blog and im very thankful for your contribution to this project! I mean, just look at how cute this art is!

Thank you 💜 💛

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@your-bigender-big-brother

Thank you for being apart of this and being educational to everyone! You even made my post even better by explaining even more about being bi-gender!

“If you'd like some further information on the bigender identity, I have a Gender of the Day post here! I also have a bigender masterpost here on my main blog.

Additionally, here are some other bigender flags! One of the most common ones currently being used by the community is the upper left one!

Want some bigender blogs to follow?

@talking-bigender @bigendering @bigender-culture-is

And as a little bonus, I have my own bigender flag down below, called the sunrise/sunset bigender flag.

- Your Bigender Big Brother 💙💚”

Thank You 🙏 💚

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@msmoon-and-the-cyberdemon

Thank you for being so enthusiastic about this and being wonderful! I hope your future is bright aswell 💚

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@loud-whistling-yes

Thank you for representing Demigirl and for just being proud!

“Hey guys! 👋 I'm the guest for today's pride of june! If you guys have any questions about demigirl as a gender identity, or any questions about it in general, I'm more than happy to give you my part of the answer! Do remember that everyone sees gender differently, and while there's no "right" or "wrong" answer to gender, I hope my answers might help anyone with whatever they're looking for. Happy pride everyone!! ❤️🧡💛💚💙💜”

Thank you Ah Wei 🩷

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@demigender-culture-is

Demigender Culture is YOU! Thank you for being in this and representing the demigender flag :) And you even made this!

Thank you! 💛

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@honeymilkhijinks

A polyamorous pansexual! And a non-binary! Thank you for participating in this and being you! 💜 💛 ❤️

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@jd-leifdeloos

thank you for being part of the Polyamorous flag day. It’s hard being accepted but you being there was very cool! Thank you so much ❤️

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@just-one-more-utmv-fan

Thank you for sharing light to the very unknown sexuality Gynesexual. You even made this!

You are helping more people learn about it just by reblogging all of this project :) 🤎

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@that-one-enby-ranger

Thank you for representing Abrosexual, a sexuality that I feel a lot of people forget about! You are amazing 💚

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@dejimonkaizaa

You were amazing for this project and you even decided to talk about your life as an intersex person!

“I have a condition called simple-virilizing congenital adrenal hyperplasia, or what’s usually called “classic CAH.” I was born with XX chromosomes and assigned female at birth, and I also have ambiguous genitalia and a hormone profile of typical estrogen and atypical testosterone called hyperandrogenism. This means I have one of the dozens of variations that can make a person what we call intersex. In many ways, I love my intersex body and identity, but much like any other person could, I do not feel my assigned sex is my gender. Being intersex is part of me, but I am also an intersex man. I am a transgender man, but I might fall better into a category called utltergender—while I will transition to be more masculine, I was already born with many of these features. What I would like for perisex (not-intersex) people to understand about being intersex is that you won’t always understand, and that’s okay. We will have bodies you don’t understand. We will have transition patterns you don’t understand. We will have identities you don’t understand. We are not born male or female in a world where everyone must be, and even when we identify ourselves within the binary, we are never truly accepted into it. Yet, to this end, you must advocate for us, because we are not enough to win fights on our own. We do not have communities like every other queer identity—most intersex people don’t know any other intersex people in real life. We don’t have clubs, we don’t have bars, we don’t even have representation at pride events much of the time—we are invisible. Make space for us. If you want to put I in the acronym, know why you do. Know who and what we are and why we are important beyond a quick gotcha against the binary.”

Thank you for being so open! 💜

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@askatrigenderlgbt

“Hey everyone, this post is going to be a bit different. Pride month is nearing an end and I was ask to make a special something for this project I'm in.

I want to talk about my journey with discovering my sexuality and gender identity, along with my battle with my disability battle with ADHD.

I was around 15 or 16 when I started to question my identity. I didn't understand what or why I was different from everyone else around me. I didn't understand why I faked being in love with boys or found myself only falling in love with fictional boys but not real guys. Then I began to think harder. I realized that maybe I wasn't so straight.

As I was finding my way I explored different labels, explored my gender, and eventually finally admitted that I needed therapy for my health.

At first I thought I was bisexual and nonbinary. At the time it felt correct, but time past and I realized it didn't make sense or feel right. I needed to keep looking. Then I identified as lesbian and demigirl, but once again later down the line they didn't feel like me.

Finding your identity takes time, trying things out for a time and seeing what makes you feel you. There is no rush, no impending doom waiting around the next second.

I finally found my gender when I was looking online about different genders in the trans and nonbinary umbrella: trigender.

Trigender is a gender similar to gender fluid. One identifies as three genders, whether all at once- like a mix of colors- or flux between the three- like colors melting into another.

Trigender was the labe that felt right, where I felt myself click into place. I felt like a woman, a man, but in between- nonbinary. It made sense and felt just right for me.

As for my sexuality? I am still into women, but I now use Gynosexual as my label. It is a gender neutral way to say that a person is attracted to women identifying genders or feminine traits. Which I am.

I also figured out I am ageosexual. Ageosexual is a sexuality on the asexual spectrum. Ageosexual is a sexuality where one isn't disgusted seeing anything sexual in nature, able to watch 'adult fun' without being uncomfortable, but still having no desire for sexual intercourse of any kind.

I can handle a sex scene or joke in media, but even the thought of actually having sex makes me uncomfortable and nauseous. I don't like even the thought of anyone I may date in the future see me naked, god forbid touch me. I will hold hands, kiss on the cheek, peck on the mouth, cuddle, hug, but anything else is a no. Just no.

So after finding the labels that fit me and have found myself comfortable with them, I settled on my pronouns next: they/them. I didn't like being referred to as just she/her, just female. I liked the more neutral they/them as it feels better and more like me. It felt right. But everyone around is still having to get used to my pronouns and using them. Learning is still going on, my family no used to my pronouns as they spent years with my old ones.

But my mental health during this? I went to see a therapist at 16, working on my depression and anxiety first. I was prescribed medication to help deal with my issues and given tools to help manage what the medication can't. Medicine isn't a cure for mental health, it just helps manage the issues one has.

After I was given the starting tools I worked on myself and tried hard in high school. I was more energetic, I felt less tired, and I had more motivation. It didn't last however. I began to have issues with attention, I kept getting distracted easily, forgot things constantly, was restless, overall a mess without knowing why.

Then my doctor prescribed me with a medication I recognized my mother taking. It was one she took for her bipolar. So I thought for a while I had bipolar, stupid I know but hey I wasn't thinking clearly. But soon I was diagnosed with ADHD, given medication and tools I needed to manage things, and found myself more relaxed- and given confirmation that I do not have bipolar. I could sleep longer than four hours. I could finally have my thoughts slow down. I even could focus better.

But the struggle wasn't done. You see, during one summer on a boiling hot day, I tried to end my life by heat stroke. I had turned my heater on full blare on the hotest day that week. Then I took a nap, hoping to anyone listening that I wouldn't wake up. I woke up, drenched in sweat, realizing what I nearly done. I turned off the heater and quickly tried to cool myself down. I only confessed about till six to seven months after that happened. This was when I was around 19, probably 20. I had dropped high school before this, the stress of dealing with family problems, moving, and the pandemic just beginning. I wasn't great mentally.

I have also experienced cutting before, something common sadly with people dealing with depression and constant stress. It wasn't a good feeling. The pain of cutting was not what I enjoyed ever, but I am ashamed to say this, but I did like how it made me numb to everything.

In the present day I am much better, not perfect but not a mess, I'm simply okay. I've been through so much and have many years to go hopefully. To end this post as it is long enough as it is I will say this:

Your journey will not be like anyone else's, it's your life and you will find the pieces of yourself in time. You just have to find what feels right and what is comfortable. You may have a hard time with your disabilities, mental or physical, but you have support around you ready to help. There are people who want to help you get better, you'll find them. I know it. Just be kind to yourself, allow time to feel out what it is you need. And allow yourself to make mistakes.

The worst thing I ever did was try to be perfect, to be strong. In actually, it's okay to be weak and to be imperfect. We all need to learn by making mistakes, grow from them. And sometimes we need to let out emotions, to stop trying to hold everything inside.

It's okay to be yourself.”

Thank you :) 🩷

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@notsofunsenpai

Thank you for participating and being a representative of the Pansexual Flag! You are wonderful 💛

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@bloggingboutburgers and their partner @civiart

You guys did so much! Not a lot of people know about QPRs and you did not shy away from the task of educating! You made this amazing art

And this amazing explanation

“What it's like to be in a QPR? Well, at the very least the QPR I'm in is very comfortable I'll say far most! It's hard to define in exact words to describe the relationship. It's the closeness and comfortable vulnerability of being with someone that you see as your life partner. The more meme-esque way I like describing it is Akhts is my ride or die!! Life is crazy and so unpredictable! It throws hands at ya in anyway it wants to and you just have to figure out how to roll with the punches and face it! It gets hard to face it on your own, so it's nice to build a dynamic with someone where you can share the messiness of life. There's that element of closeness you have with them that's just really comforting and fills your heart in a special way. It's always an honor being able to spend time together with a beloved and feel that solidarity confidence in one another. It's like the dynamic and development for this relationship just lead up to it naturally without the mix of romance and sexual attraction. It's definitely a relationship of what feels right to each individual. At least for mine, I'm really happy being in a QPR with Akhts! The dear really gives me a lot of comfort, company, and honestly sharing the braincell too. I'm honored to have her company and will absolutely prance my adoration for her! Life feels so much more fuller with her!"

Thank you both! I wish you the best of lives! 🩷

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And finally, I’d like to thank my mutual and friend @bloodied-dagger, who made this wonderful musical piece to end off pride month

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Wow! This got long haha! In all seriousness though, thank you all! You all did such a wonderful job and really helped me on this project. But now Pride Month is Over. This doesn’t mean we shouldn’t be prideful though. The US Supreme Court made a ruling on June 30th saying businesses had the right to deny service to queer people. This is devastating to the queer community and is ranking us equivalent to a second class. We should be recognized as human beings and shouldn’t be made to feel guilty, dirty, or sinful for being who we are.

Now that July is here lots of queers are joking about Gay Wrath Month, but July already has its pride. July is about Disability. Disability is still rarely accommodated even in 2023 and we need to draw attention to that. People with disabilities shouldn’t be looked upon as if they were lower than those without. So this month mine and your challenge is to help those with disabilities. Donate to funds or just simply don’t be a jerk or make ableist jokes. Be kind this month.

All of my Art will be posted in a big post on my art blog @accidentally-drank-paintwater if anyone wishes to see all of them together. Happy Pride!

[skatergrungebah]

4 member subsystem (all level 2). each member is after a different season (spring, summer, fall, & winter). we'd prefer irl faceclaims!

- 📻

of course. i would do irl faceclaims but im really picky with what i choose with real people so im sorry but i decided to use a picrew instead, apologies, hope you& like them regardless

name: march, april, may, poppy, bloom, clover

nicknames: none

age: 28

pronouns: she/her, they/them, su/sun, flo/flower, blo/bloom, blos/blossom, pet/petal, spro/sprout, rain/rainy

gender: transgender woman; sunfloweric, dandedappline, florengender

orientations: cupioromantic heterosexual

role: mother figure, trauma neutralizer

sign off: - 🌱🌻

aesthetic: springcore, flowercore, cottagecore

personality traits: friendly, calm, motherly, caring, soft-spoken, a bit of a pushover

likes: flowers, picnics, light rainy days, sunny days, windy days, flowercrowns

dislikes: thunderstorms, decaying plants, horror movies, rock and roll music

hobbies: gardening, picking fruits, sunbathing, making flowercrowns

faceclaim:

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name: beau, marigold, owen, morgan, joey, felix

nicknames: mari, joe

age: 21

pronouns: he/him, sun/sunnny, sum/summer, bea/beach, fun/funs, party/partys

gender: demiboy; summergender, summerlexic, teassúli

orientations: pansexual

role: socializer, delight, battery, spoon generator

sign off: -🕶️⛱️

aesthetic: summercore, beachcore

personality traits: fun-loving, playful, outgoing, social, extroverted, daring

likes: parties, the beach, making new friends

dislikes: idle standing, boring conversations, rude introverts

hobbies: playing volleyball, swimming

faceclaim:

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name: amber, forrest, hazel, rowan, august, poe

nicknames: none

age: 17

pronouns: they/them, it/its, ze/zem, fall/falls, leaf/leafs, pump/pumpkin, sweater/sweaters, hallow/halloween

gender: transmasc nonbinary; autumngender, fallgender, autumnosic

orientations: demisexual bi-gay omniromantic

role: isolator, soother

sign off: -🍂

aesthetic: fallcore

personality traits: calm, quiet, kind, observant, intelligent, introverted

likes: reading, black cats, rainy days, sounds of fire cracking, lofi music

dislikes: crowds, nosy people, loud noises, arguing, depressing themes in literature

hobbies: reading new books, napping, crossword puzzles

faceclaim:

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name: crystie, north, holly, eve, aira, valentine

nicknames: cryst, nev

age: 19

pronouns: she/her, they/them, it/its, shx/hxr, love/loves, heart/heart, frost/frosts, snow/snows

gender: cisgender girl; frosteredwintergender, winterish, lovegender, lovebodiment

orientations: lesbian

role: attraction holder, confidence booster

sign off: -❤️❄️

aesthetic: lovecore, wintercore

personality traits: confident, flirty, friendly, uplifting, cheeky, loyal

likes: romance movies, snow, winter storms, candles

dislikes: big words, falling out of love

hobbies: making snow angels

faceclaim:

[justsomeoneintoomanyfandoms]

Hello there! Might I have a genshin matchup, if it’s not too much trouble?

My name is Emily (she/her) and I’m a lesbian, though if you think about platonically matching me with a male character, I would not mind. My Zodiac sign is Capricorn and last I checked, my MBTI is INFP, the mediator.

Appearance wise, I’m roughly 5’6 and have a pudgy baby face, wavy dark blonde hair (that’s quite soft!), almond shaped brown eyes with shadows underneath that I can never seem to get rid of, thick thighs, pale skin, and moles scattered all over my body. I do not wear makeup and the most I will put on if I feel like it is some mascara. I typically clothing shop in the men’s section and tend to wear comfy, casual stuff like jeans/sweatpants and flannels/hoodies.

Personality: the first word most people use to describe me is quiet. I’ve been told that I’m sweet, funny, easygoing, loyal, idealistic, loving, and warm. I’m quite laidback and it takes a lot to rile me, but I am passionate about certain things. I do suffer from depression and social anxiety, though I do try to hide present symptoms to avoid worrying those close to me.

I love having time to myself to read a good book, research things that interest me (mainly history related), play video games with a good story or pretty art, or catch up on sleep. I do enjoy a good beer as well. I also love learning about history and law. I recently graduated with a degree in English and creative writing, and a minor in archaeology! If I like someone, romantic or not, my giving love language is acts of service, which manifests in cooking/baking meals and treats. My receiving love language is physical touch (I am extremely touch starved and love hugs/massages/having my hair played with)

I heavily dislike people being pushy (I work in customer service🙃), loud noises, guns, bigotry, hypocrisy, and ignorance. I do have a bit of androphobia (fear of men), so even though I will strike up friendships with some, I despise being touched by men.

Were I to be a character in Genshin with a Vision, I’d like to be a Hydro swordswoman from Fontaine😊

Hi Emily! Thank you for your request! Sorry it took so long. I decided to give you a romantic and platonic matchup. I hope you like your matchups!

In Genshin Impact, I match you with...

You and Jean are a good match for each other. You're quite different but you balance each other out well, striking a good mix of easygoingness and organisation.

Loves it when you make lunch or snacks for her to have at work. She enjoys your cooking and it's something she can look forward to when she's having a particularly tough day.

Jean's reasonably good with physical touch as well. She's not overly into PDA but behind closed doors she's happy to give you as much affection as you want, whether that's hand holding, hugs, head pats, or anything else.

There's nothing quite like a relaxing drink at the Angel's Share after a long day of work. I see Jean as someone who enjoys a good beer as well so when you go out together, you can take turns shouting the other their drink.

She does have her moment where she can be pushy but that's more a side effect of her position in the Knights of Favonius. She always doe she best to leave that role at work and just be Jean when she's with you.

In Genshin Impact, I platonically match you with...

I know you mentioned disliking men but I felt like Alhaitham would be a good platonic matchup for you. He's pretty quiet and okay with his own company so he's more than willing to spend as much or as little time with you as you want.

He does enjoy reading with you though. Usually he likes solitude while reading but if you're a quiet reader, he's happy to sit near you while you enjoy your own books.

I think he would like talking about what you've been reading as well. Swapping and comparing books is a good way to pass the time and gain an understanding of books you haven't got around to reading as well.

Alhaitham doesn't strike me as some who's a huge foodie but he does enjoy your cooking if you share it with him. He thinks you're quite skilled at combining flavours into something both you and he will enjoy.

He's quite observant so I think he would see through you and notice your anxiety and depression soon after meeting you. He'll do his best to subtly check in on you and make sure you're doing okay.