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*Currently on a flying donut*

Stephen Strange : have you EVER come across someone more difficult than yourself?

Tony Stark : you’re up there

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Dr. Strange in spiderman NWH trailer : *doing everything wrong* like that?

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basically peter parker in NWH : Maybe if i fell in love with anxiety it will also leave me!

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*Natasha and Yelena infront of a restaurant*

Natasha, reading the restaurant sign that's clearly says lebanese cuisine : les.bian.cui.sine.

Yelena : pussy~

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MJ : listen, all i'm saying is if you would just stop spending money on SIMS 4 maybe then you could pay your rent...?

Peter, sniffling : i know, i know

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yelena, probably : all i'm saying is if a mosquito asked me nicely for some blood i'd be like "hey, sure thing i have a lot to go around" but the fact that they don't even ask and then they inject me with itchy juice... ARE YOU??? jUsT aSk

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Mobius : i'm really happy that you're making an effort into being the sexy goddess that you are.

Loki : no. no effort necessary.

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john walker : why are you dressed like somebody died?

bucky barnes, flatly : wait.

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happy : since when babysitting peter is my job

happy : ...omg that's exactly my job

[theincorrectbrain]

This is the start of Loki x Y/N

[theincorrectbrain]

*in the mall*

sam : it's the alpaca world

*talking to the employee*

sam : where do the alpaca from? are they from colorado

employee : no, this is come from peru

bucky : oh really

sam : *pointing at a yellow jacket* that's probably from real alpaca

bucky : i don't think there's yellow alpaca

sam : well they dyed it

bucky : OF COURSE IT FUCKING DIED

sam : why did-

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peter parker speaking with a lisp : for those of you who don't know i tried to eat raw onion on tiktok live yesterday and now i have chemical burn on my tongue. so i talk like this. and i like many americans, i'm shock that my actions do in fact have consequences

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*peter parker making snapchat*

peter: it's cookie time..

harley: damn, this cookie hits harder than my dad.

peter: *stares awkwardly into the camera*

[theincorrectbrain]

peter making A film by Peter Parker part 2

peter walking in the beach : footprint on the sand? but then you turn around and see another set because jesus is with you all along...

ned (behind peter) : my name is ned....

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peter during ffh : everyone keep telling me to buy weighted blanket but why would i sleep with the weighted blanket when i could sleep with the weight of knowing i would never be enough

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5’8 little MOUSY boys that live in the WALL and crawl around for CHEESE