#sam wilson incorrect quotes

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Kate: What did you get Yelena for her birthday?

Y/N: I got her a dog.

Kate: Really? Me too!

Sam: I also got her a dog!

Bucky: Looks like we had the same idea.

Y/N: Scott, please tell me you didn’t get Yelena a dog as well.

Scott: I got her a dog!

[cuts to Yelena surrounded by dogs]

Yelena: THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!

[romanoffshouse]

Bucky: Y/N, what does IDK, ILY, and TTYL mean?

Y/N: I don’t know, I love you, talk to you later.

Bucky: Alright, I love you too, I'll ask Sam.

Y/N: Wait- Bucky , no-

[chaxan08]

Bucky: I think it's time to get my life in order.

Sam, narrating: But he didn’t get his life in order. In fact, he got drunk last night and ended up fighting a raccoon.

Rocket: Hey, don't call me that!

[gfmaximoff]

Y/N: Are you in love with Sam?

Bucky: *sweats* No…

Y/N: Then why do you draw 'S+B' in hearts everywhere?

Bucky: It stands for Suffering and Bitterness.

[louwaffles]

Y/N: Hey, guys. What if I told you I made a bad mistake?

Nat: This wouldn’t be the first time I’m disappointed in you. 

Steve: It would show your levels of maturity are dropping. 

Tony: It would actually be alarming to hear you didn’t make a mistake. 

Sam, from the bathroom: Y/N, what did you do to these cookies?!

[welovelouisandbucky]

Avengers Incorrect Quotes #idc

(y/n showing off their new fit)

Sharon: nice fit, where did you get it from?

Y/n, deadpan: your mom's closet

...

Y/n: can someone please help me?

Sharon, standing up immediately: here—

Y/n:nofuckoff. *Proceeds to limp to the room with broken rib and a stab wound*

J*hn, just existing:

Y/n and Bucky: and we took that personally.

...

Sharon accidently spills drink on Bucky's shirt.

Sharon: oh my- I'm so sorry

Y/n, lits lighter: don't worry I got this.

Sam: you're gonna burn the shirt?—

Y/n: who said anything about shirt?

Sam:oh okay... WAIT Y/N NO!

Cuts to scene Sharon running for her life.

[yourloverfromthepast]

Sam: Oh my- where the fu- JESUS CHRIST!

Bucky: Uuh, why you throwin' gang signs?

Sam: Huh? I'm not- *sighs* I can hear this fucking mosquito but for some reason I can't see it

Bucky, turning towards you: Aaaand, what the hell are you filming? A ghost?

Y/n: A ghost? Oh no! Scott asked me to edit a video of him singing "Umbrella" while being tiny. There, look. *Proceeds to point at the table in front of the couch*

Sam, who was sitting on the couch, now standing up: Are you for real? No, like, ARE YOU FOR REAL?? I'VE BEEN TRYING TO CATCH A MOSQUITO FOR FIVE MINUTES AND IT TURNS OUT IT WAS TIC-TAC?!?!

[iwanttohugyousomuch]

Sam: What are you smiling at?

Bucky: What can a guy be happy-

Zemo: John Walker fell down on the stairs

[yourmyfavoriteperson]

Sam: *Kiss bucky on the cheek*

Bucky: what was that for?*Wipe off the kiss on his cheek*

Sam: For good luck

Bucky: I don't need luck

*Hours later*

Bucky: Sam can you kiss me again-

[incorrectquotesmcu]

Sam: Stressed.

Bucky: Depressed.

Yelena: Possessed.

Kate: Obsessed.

Peter: Impressed.

Wade: Chicken breast.

Everyone: ...What?

Wade: I just wanted to join in.

[romanoffshouse]

Steve: You bought a taco?

Sam: Yeah

Steve: From the same truck that hit Bucky?

Sam:

Sam: Well me starving ain’t gonna help him!

[chaxan08]

Sam: Top three hottest people in the Thunderbolts.

Kate: First up, the first one it's totally Yelena.

Sam: Hold on! No! Bucky's the one!

Kate: Bucky is, like, annoying and hot. Yelena is, like, spooky hot.

Sam: Eww, gross.

Kate: I like her hair, and she looks like she'd be a really good cuddler.

Sam: Yelena looks like she'd kill you in your sleep!

Kate, dreamily: Yeah, I love that.

[multifan113]

TFATWS Incorrect Quotes 5

Sam: It’s AmeriCAN, not AmeriCAN’T

Bucky: You AmeriSHOULDN’T!

[louwaffles]

Y/N: Babe?

Bucky, soft yet quiet:

Y/N: James, honey?

Bucky: Hmm?

Y/N: Can I get off your lap? I’m not mad, but you knocked Sam out and I need to check if he’s still alive. 

Sam, unresponsive and laying in a small pool of blood after poking fun at Bucky being soft: 

[that-headcanon-girl]

Y/N: can you help me with this?

sam: yeah sure

Y/N: thank you, I love you

sam:

Y/N:

sam:

Y/N: what?

peter: don't worry she says that to everyone

sam: :(

[yourloverfromthepast]

Y/n: Damn, why can't he answer the phone!

Sam: Who you tryin' to call?

Y/n: My friend, Joe

Tony, entering the room: Who's Joe?

Y/n: JOE MAMAAAAA

*Sam bursts out laughing*

Tony, dead serious: You're childish. Grow up. And go fuck yourself.