#writing this one made me realize i have no clue what half of the shit i draw is tho LOL i gotta up my vocab
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Audine :)
#art#traditional art#watercolour#fanart#vocal synth#audine#maghni#magnhi. magni. mbaghi. ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. cannot spell this software#i really like her. i didnt realize her arms were like robot arms until i looked at some design sheets that shit rules#still gave up on the rest of her clothes and put here in a little sundress. you know how i am <3#ALSO i have been trying to write alt text for my drawings now! keyword trying#i did research into guides but that can only get me so far... i hope i can get better at it quickly#HOPEFULLY a combination of my art history major experiences with formal analyses and also just knowing how nvda works will help#HOPEFULLY hopefully i will do my best and keep trying#writing this one made me realize i have no clue what half of the shit i draw is tho LOL i gotta up my vocab
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I was the one who made reader have a you her sibling they take care of, just saying, it was so amazing. I love it:D. I have another request. This one was a bit weird and rushed cause like I'm a sleepover with two of my cousins so
Billy Loomis, Bubba Sawyer, Art the Clown, Stu Matcher, Thomas Hewitt, Jason, Michael, Billy Lenz, Pinhead, Tiffany (if you write for her) Charles/Chucky, Bo, Vincent, Lester, Brahms. If you want to add more or get rid of some it's okay. But you can either have it platonic of them being a younger sibling or child (adopted or not) going to a sleepover. Maybe sneaking out to it. They go to find out where they are and find them in a house and they are being loud, laughing, and just being kids
If you don't do platonic (cause I can't remember if you do or don't) then do it romantically and just like the same thing. You can change things if you that helps and sorry about this. But, the request I first made and you did, it was a great and made me smile cause I didn't expect it so thanks for that
slashers reactions to their younger sibling reader sneaking out to a sleepover ; headcanons
WARNING: None
PAIRING: Billy Loomis & Sibling! Reader, Bubba Sawyer & Sibling! Reader, Art the Clown & Sibling! Reader, Stu Macher & Sibling! Reader, Thomas Hewitt & Sibling! Reader, Jason Voorhees & Sibling! Reader, Michael Myers & Sibling! Reader, Billy Lenz & Sibling! Reader, Pinhead & Sibling! Reader, Tiffany Valentine & Sibling! Reader, Charles Lee Ray/Chucky & Sibling! Reader, Bo Sinclair & Sibling! Reader, Vincent Sinclair & Sibling! Reader, Lester Sinclair & Sibling! Reader, Brahms Heelshire & Sibling! Reader
NOTE: Hope you enjoyed this! I could imagine so many of them struggling to hold back but ultimately wanting to let you just be a kid and have fun. Thank you so much for this request; it was a blast to write!
BILLY LOOMIS
You’ve managed to sneak out quietly, thinking Billy won’t notice because he’s engrossed in a movie marathon.
But within half an hour, he realizes you’re gone and his “big sibling” instincts kick in.
He shows up at the house with that intense, unblinking stare that could stop anyone mid-laugh.
Who do you think you are, sneaking out like this?
He’s relieved (and slightly embarrassed) to see you just goofing off with friends.
Pretends to be unimpressed when you’re caught off guard.
He’ll let you stay—for now—
With the most deadpan expression, muttering,
“You could’ve just told me.”
But he’s not about to let you get away with it.
Once you’re back home, he’s the silent-but-deadly type. Just know you’re grounded.
BUBBA SAWYER
Bubba panics the minute he realizes you’re gone, running through the house and making distressed sounds as he searches for you.
He's going to family members and pointing to where your things should be.
The whole family tries to calm him down, but he’s inconsolable until he finds a clue leading him to the sleepover house.
When he tracks you down, he’s so relieved he doesn’t know what to do.
Seeing you safe and having fun brings tears to his eyes.
He’ll probably sit outside the house, just quietly waiting for you to finish.
If you notice him, he might wave shyly or even try to make himself “invisible.”
ART THE CLOWN
Oh, Art knows you’ve snuck out, and he’s amused.
He’s both delighted to have a reason to check in and irritated that you thought you could get away with this.
Appears at the sleepover out of nowhere, scaring the life out of anyone who notices him lurking outside.
Watches silently, only making himself known to you with that twisted grin of his, waving as if to say, “Caught you!”
Doesn't stop you from having fun but does make it clear that he knows—and will remember.
Expect creepy antics as payback when you get home.
STU MACHER
Stu probably wasn’t paying enough attention to notice you sneaking out right away, but once he does..
He's MAD.
Once he finds the house, he’s too tempted not to sneak around and scare the shit out of all of you.
Might throw a pebble at the window to get your attention and then give you a dramatic pout, mouthing,
“How could you leave me out?”
When you get home, he’ll give you a long (and playful) guilt trip about how you left him to "suffer".
THOMAS HEWITT
Notices you’re missing right away.
Thomas doesn’t like you out of his sight, so he feels uneasy, imagining the worst.
He follows you quietly, not wanting to interrupt.
When he spots you through the window, safe and laughing, he stops, taking a deep breath of relief.
Watches you with a slight smile, just relieved to see you having fun.
He’s happy that you’re being a normal kid and knows better than to interrupt that.
Will probably leave you alone and probably won't bring it up, ever.
He would definitely prefer if you let him know though.
JASON VOORHEES
Jason’s heart drops when he notices you’re not in your usual spot, and he’s anxious as he starts tracking you down.
He’s relieved to see you laughing and safe with friends.
Stays outside or hidden, keeping a protective eye.
He doesn’t want to interrupt but also doesn’t want anything sneaking up on you.
Plus, who knows if these kids don't mean any harm?
Might leave little signs outside (like stacked stones) to let you know he was there, just to make sure you’re safe.
MICHAEL MYERS
He’s annoyed.
Why would you leave his protection?
Michael doesn’t even try to blend in; he’s the shadow at the window.
Once you see his white mask peeking in, you know the jig is up.
He won’t cause a scene, but he just stares until you get the message.
When you sneak out to meet him, he’ll give you a tiny “you-know-better” look, but he’s not mad—he just wants you safe.
Doesn’t reveal himself to anyone else, but he’ll stay there the entire time.
When you get home, expect a long, silent stare, reminding you that you’re not as sneaky as you think.
BILLY LENZ
He notices right away.
Billy has a keen eye for your whereabouts, and he’s instantly on the move, tracking you down.
Peers through the window, watching you play with a pout.
He feels oddly betrayed but finds your happiness too endearing to be angry.
He won’t disrupt the fun, but you might catch a glimpse of him outside, holding his hands up in an “I’m watching you” gesture.
When you get home, he’ll tease you nonstop about “abandoning him.”
PINHEAD
This is completely out of the ordinary, and he is both confused and a bit annoyed that you snuck out without informing him.
Appears in his signature, intimidating way, silently observing from outside.
He finds the concept of a “sleepover” curious.
He’s more contemplative about it, watching as if studying some strange new human ritual.
He waits until you’re ready to return and then accompanies you back without a word.
You can expect a very stern lecture when you get home about the importance of communication…
TIFFANY VALENTINE
She realizes quickly that you’re gone and storms out to find you, though her anger’s more worried than anything.
When she spots you through the window, laughing and having fun, her irritation fades into a soft smile.
She won’t interrupt, just stands outside and watches for a bit.
She loves seeing you like this, happy and unbothered.
When you get back, she’ll playfully scold you but then pull you into a hug, reminding you to tell her next time.
CHUCKY (CHARLES LEE RAY)
Chucky’s annoyed at first, muttering to himself,
“What does this kid think they’re doing?”
He’s irritated you’d sneak off, especially without his “permission,” and tracks you down, grumbling the entire way.
When he finds you, he feels an odd mix of pride and annoyance.
He likes your independence but also doesn’t like feeling “left out.”
Gives you a wicked grin through the window, mouthing, “We’re talking later.”
He’ll grumble that “next time, you should let him know,” but he’s proud you managed to sneak out without him noticing.
BO SINCLAIR
Bo is mad and lets you know it.
He’s worried you’re in danger, and when he finds you, he’s that overprotective brother with his arms crossed.
He pulls you aside, lecturing you on safety and probably embarrassing you in front of your friends.
But once he knows you’re okay, he lets up a bit and waits outside for you, a little softer.
At home, he pretends he’s still mad but lets you off the hook pretty easily.
VINCENT SINCLAIR
Vincent’s used to you being close by, so when you’re not there, he’s unnerved and worried.
Tracks you down and watches quietly, almost touched to see you carefree with your friends.
Leaves a little note or sketch somewhere you’ll find it later, a reminder of his presence even when you’re far away.
He’s quiet when you get home, but there’s a warmth to his gaze.
You should him next time..
LESTER SINCLAIR
Lester’s both amused and concerned when he finds you missing.
He tracks you down quickly, not one for letting you go unguarded.
When he finds you through the window, he watches with a fond smile, chuckling at your carefree attitude.
Might knock on the door and make up an excuse to check on you if you notice him, but he’ll mostly just let you have your fun.
Gives you a playful nudge and a “don’t think you’re getting away that easy next time” when you get back.
BRAHMS HEELSHIRE
Brahms does not take this well, feeling abandoned and maybe a bit betrayed.
When he tracks you down, he watches from the shadows, arms crossed, grumpy but protective.
Might stare until you feel his gaze and look over at him, just so you know he found you.
When you return, expect a big fuss, with Brahms grumbling about how much he “suffered” in your absence.
#slasher#slashers#slashers x reader#slasher x reader#slasher fanfiction#platonic#billy loomis x reader#bubba sawyer x reader#art the clown x reader#stu macher x reader#thomas hewitt x reader#jason voorhees x reader#michael myers x reader#billy lenz x reader#pinhead x reader#tiffany valentine x reader#charles lee ray x reader#chucky x reader#bo sinclair x reader#lester sinclair x reader#vincent sinclair x reader#brahms heelshire x reader#x reader#ask#request#fanfic#headcanons
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I'm thinking of the leak of Claire and Carmy's argument.
I'm wondering if the end of the 3rd season's song "Disarm" by Smashing Pumpkins will give us a clue - at least what the argument will highlight and the theme of season 4.
I think that's the moment- the argument it will reveal the truth of Carmy and Claire's relationship.
If I think about the end of the second season and the song that plays. Half a world away by R.E.M. the lyrics that end with Sydney go it alone foreshadows and tells us about season 3 which starts with Carmy saying I left you alone. (May I had based on that song alone I was about to predict the 3rd season).
But back to the ending of the season 3 song.
Season 3 ends with the song disarm- lyrics:
Disarm you with a smile And cut you like you want me to Cut that little child Inside of me and such a part of you Ooh, the years burn Ooh, the years burn I used to be a little boy So old in my shoes And what I choose is my choice What's a boy supposed to do? The killer in me is the killer in you My love I send this smile over to you
Giving us a hint to the 4th season. This song is quoted by Billy Corgan as:
“... rather then have an angry, angry, angry violent song I’d thought I’d write something beautiful and make them (his parents) realize what tender feelings I have in my heart, and make them feel really bad for treating me like shit.
Disarm’s hard to talk about because people will say to me ‘I listen to that song and I can’t figure out what it’s about.’ It’s like about things that are beyond words. I think you can conjure up images and put together phrases, but it’s a feeling beyond words and for me it has a lot to do with like a sense of loss. Being an adult and looking back and romanticizing a childhood that never happened or went by so quickly in a naive state that you miss it.” — Billy Corgan on Disarm
Season 4 will explore Carmy's issues with Donna, shedding light on Claire and Carmy's relationship and its core truth. It was an idealized version of what he didnt have his mother and one moment will show just how he's trying to workout his relationship with his mom through claire. How he was dating someone who has versions of donna and idealized versions of Donna carmy never got to experience.
This repeat of donna was outlined in the network script but not the show itself. This claire and carmy relationship in the show is insidious. It's not obvious she resembles donna except for her actions and the camera angles and she's also the happy- "nice" idealized version of donna that donna plays but shows her true face eventually.
It's like the song and how he idealizes a childhood- a teenage love that he never had. But realizing in season 4, like the song's synopsis, his choice in changing- in breaking that cycle of relationships that resembles his relationship with Donna.
This song is about him resolving a cycle that he made the mistake of repeating things so he can move on.
My theory on the argument shedding light of claire- it will probably happen on the night of Tiffany's wedding. They either get back together briefly, so he's Claire's plus one – probably one date to try it again – or he's Richie's plus one.
This show loves parrallels- the argument between claire-carmy-richie will resemble this scene:
Donna yelling- Carmy dealing with her anger- all of it with Richie in the middle just watching not cutting in- but who knows maybe he has changed and will step in when Claire argue with carmy- listening to disarm it's about breakin cycles- changing and Richie will do the thing he's never done with Carmy he's going to stop the argument from escalating or at least he'll try to.
Another clue of a possible parrallel: we get clues throughout the episode fishes that donna is connected to claire. Keep in mind, after the scene with Donna yelling at Carmy to move the pot, we dive into Claire—an idealized relationship Carmy never had.
After the scene with Carmy freaking out about Claire, Richie tells Tiffany about hooking Carmy up. Tiffany is surprised because from what she knows of Claire, she's so nice.
Let's talk more about that nice thing that tiffany says...because it appears through 2x06 fishes.
With the berzattos. Things and people just can't be nice. The berzattos are both kind and agressive. If claire is a bearzatto- then she has the same traits in that household. Probably being nice is not what Claire is- not fully at least.
Why this will happen the night of tiffanys wedding? Because tiffany and richie talk about claire and carmy.
And all tiffany knows is what claire said about the situation.
There's going to be another theme similar to seasons 2 and 3, where Richie and Tiffany are the ones discussing or observing Claire and Carmy's relationship with the awareness of repeating cycles. But it's not just Carmy repeating the cycle of being like Donna; it's also his relationships resembling Claire mirroring Donna.
Because from the conversation with Tiffany and what she was told about Carmy, Claire throws pity parties like Donna.
Sorry, but Claire is having a pity party over what Carmy said while he was having an existential crisis in the fridge.
Claire annoyed with the question are you okay? Yeah similarities as it's been discussed here.
Now that Carmy has faced Chef David, as Jimmy mentioned, he has to confront it head-on. Carmy will begin to see the reality and let go of the idealized versions of his mother. He will see the truth about their relationship, which will lead him to end things that no longer serve him.
Apologizing to those he's hurt the right way carmy is going to be able to smile and show the tenderness in his heart. He'll have the courage to change and no longer carry things and people from his mother. He'll break a cycle.
Now if that argument is about syd? About carmy lying - about not doing anything with sydney?
The climax of the argument: Clairebear is going to try to make Carmy say the words "I love you" just to prove something. just as Donna makes him say the words..
Remember Donna is coming to the wedding too. Both Claire and Donna he'll have to face them, and Claire and Donna being in the same room together will make the resemblance even more obvious.
We shall seee. What a mess.
Tagging: @currymanganese @whenmemorydies @turbulenthandholding @moodyeucalyptus @vacationship @fresaton @vacationship
#you get what I'm saying? we're not done with this clairebear thing#something something about psychology and being attracted to people that resemble your caregivers#this is what the show is saying...imo donna has energy like claire. another mother figure in his life- chef terry has energy that's sydneys#because that's the love you onew#or you create idealized versions of people#carmy x sydney#the bear#anti clairebear#ish#sydcarmy#check another similarity- andrea insists with carmy next time he sees her call her andrea#basically stop resolving your life around work#get to know people be personable with sydney. live my guy!#because like chef terry and syd and richie and mikey- they know you do this for the people#anyways time for carmy to surround himself with people that make him better#you make me better at this#break the cycle and be tender
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i’m in need of junkerqueen angst and this is another song one, if you don’t mind of course.
You’re losing me - Taylor Swift
you may not be into her music which is perfectly fine just hear me out with the lyrics on this one.
“Do something, babe, say something. Lose something, babe, risk something. Choose something, babe, I got nothing to believe, unless you're choosin' me”
you see my vision here? the heart breaking angst that could be written here 🙏🙏
trust
You're Losing Me (Junkerqueen x reader)
Things hadn't been normal in a very long time. You didn't know what it was, but something just wasn't right. The love of your life hadn't been around as much as when the two of you moved in together.
The two of you were inseparable at first. She took you everywhere, even to confidential meetings. There was nothing you didn't do together. But a year or so back, she started acting weird. At first you thought it was just her being stressed out from work, so you tried to be patient. To be someone that she could talk to.
But nothing changed.
If anything, it got worse.
Odessa started staying out much later than you were used to. She didn't parade you around town as much. Didn't take you out at least once a week. Didn't let you go to meetings with her to let you sit on her lap while she made jokes about what people were saying.
Instead, it was you staying at home. You’d do laps around the house just to be able to move around. Wash the dishes and dry them and put them away and then decide to re organize everything because it didn’t make sense how it was. Decide that the way that you did it was dumb and then put it back to how it was originally. Then look at it again and decide that both ways were stupid so you re did it again. You’d wipe down counters and mop floors. Make the bed and then re-make the bed after you decide to lay down.
But nothing helps the ache in your chest. Nothing helps the way that you long for your girlfriend to be with you. To have her make you laugh. To have her pepper you in kisses and tell you how she loves you.
To have her
One day you decide you’ve had enough. You can’t wait around for her to realize how you’re feeling. Anytime you try to talk to her about it she’d just brush it off and say, “we’ll do something together soon.” But soon never came. Soon was some intangible thing that you could never seem to reach, always being pushed back. It was always right there, so close. But it was also always so far away, ungraspable.
So you write a note. It has every emotion that you’re too scared to tell her in person. Every time that she left you to your own emotions. Every time she left you to comfort yourself.
Every time she left you
Every time she decided that she had better things than you.
You, who waited until ungodly hours of the morning for her.
You, who was always there for her.
You, who wanted nothing more than for her to choose her the way you chose her.
You, who loved her more than anything.
You, who never got that love back.
Everything you wanted to scream at her was right on that piece of paper. Every emotion you could never seem to verbalize before was there.
But, of course, Dez took that time to come home early.
She had already been having a shitty day. No clue why, but she had been. She woke up from sleeping on the couch, not wanting to risk waking you and hearing your endless questions, and went to go make coffee like she normally did. Except she couldn’t find her mug because you kept moving it, so she had to spend half an hour looking for it, only to realize that you had set it out by the coffee maker. Then she spilled it on her lap, making her have to change clothes. The shower blasted her with freezing cold water randomly. She couldn’t find the pair of clothes that she wanted to wear to a really important meeting. She was then late to said really important meeting.
All in all, her day was shit.
And it got worse when she say you at the same counter where you left her coffee mug, writing a note with bags packed. Her heart dropped into her stomach.
“What’re ya doin?” Dez asked.
You jumped, not expecting her to be home, and cringed as you turned around. You were just re-reading the note for the millionth time, trying to convince yourself to throw it away and go back to your room.
“I’m…I’m leaving, Odessa.”
“…what?”
You never used her full name. Never. It was always Dez or Dessa or “My Queen.” Never Odessa.
“I said I’m leaving. I can’t take this anymore.”
“Can’t take what? Living in the luxury that I provide for you?”
The venom in her words shocked you. It was unexpected and hurt a lot more than you thought it would. Apparently the walls that you had built up to prevent this weren’t as effective as you had hoped.
“The luxury that you provide for me isn’t what I want, Odessa. I want you. But I can never seem to have you anymore. You’re always out doing something else. Sleeping on the couch to avoid me. Telling me that we’ll do something together soon and then soon never comes. I’m tired of it. I can’t…I can’t live like this.”
Your words shocked the both of you. Odessa looked at you, a mix of shock and concern on her face. But that mixed look changed to rage. How dare you?
“Excuse me? I have a whole damn country to run. Pardon me for not being able to spend every waking moment with you. What is it that you do, anyway?”
Your sorrow quickly changed to rage at her words. “What is it that I do? I make sure that you come home to a clean house. I clean everything a million times over. I go and get groceries and then make your breakfast, lunch, and dinner out of said groceries and then go and get more. I make sure that the water in the shower is hot enough so that you can take as long as you may need to destress. I offer myself as comfort and solace for you, but you’re “too busy” to pay any attention. I’m fucking done! I don’t deserve this! God fucking damnit, Odessa, open your eyes!” You shouted back.
The queen in front of you just stared in shock. You’d never, ever spoken to her like that.
Ever.
When she didn’t respond, you got angrier. “Jesus, say something. Do something, Odessa! I need you to choose.” Your voice softened. “And by god I need you to choose me. I need you to choose me so bad because you’re my everything. You’re my everything and I don’t know who I am without you. But if I’m not your everything too then I’m leaving.”
Still, Odessa didn’t say a word. It was like her mouth was glued shut. Tears had started streaming down your cheeks at some point and you angrily wiped them away. “You’re about to loose me and you won’t even any anything. Great to know. Goodbye, Odessa Stone. Goodbye.”
And with that, you were gone. You’d picked up your bag and walked out the front door, slamming it behind you. All while Odessa just watched.
It was after you left that Odessa came to her senses. Everything in her screamed to chase after you, to beg you to come back. But what good would that do? Instead, the giant of a woman slowly walked to the counter and read your note.
She couldn’t even finish it before the tears started. She sobbed as she read how you were feeling. As she realized what she had been doing to you. God, she deserved this.
She had all of Junkertown and yet she couldn’t even keep you.
Odessa sunk to the floor, clutching the last thing of yours that she had as she cried.
#why did you make me do this#overwatch#overwatch 2#junkerqueen simp supreme#junkerqueen x Reader#overwatch2#overwatch x reader#junkerqueen angst#overwatch Angst
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OC-tober day 2 - New OC
My newest character I'd call an OC is Ralph, the love interest and coterie-mate to my wife's character Khloe in the VTM game I'm STing for, The Poisoned Peach. Ralph is a spiced up self insert and has been a blast to play.
A factoid about him is his full name is Randolph Gaylord King IV. He's a thin blood but has the clan curse of his Nosferatu sire. My goal when playing him is to be the coolest and dorkiest guy in the room. I wanted to write something focused on just the boy but also wouldn't be any spoilers for my wife, so here is his embrace! I hope you enjoy!
The warm summer night air blew hard, causing him to stumble as he drunkenly tried to navigate a city he’d never been to before. Ralph took a deep breath and tried to focus on his phone which had directions to his hotel on it, but his head was swimming and his vision blurred. “Fuckin’ Marta ass,” He half slurred and grumbled out loud. “Last train at midnight ass.” He switched to his Instagram to check how posts from earlier in the night were doing.
There were several posts of him posing with other Instagram celebrities, nearly all he could not remember the names of. The more popular people he’d posed with got his own posts better hits, as he thought they would. Annoyingly, the pic he took of someone taking his prosthetic foot wasn’t doing well. It was an embarrassing situation he’d hoped to monetize but obviously it wasn’t as interesting as the barely concealed female presenting nipples in his other pictures.
He soon looked up and realized he had no idea where he was. “Fuuuuuuck.” He let out in frustration as he quickly looked back to his phone, pulling up the directions again... just to see that he’d overshot his hotel by over a mile somehow. “Fuck two electric boogaloo. Fuck it, I’ll Uber-loo.” Grumbling in resignation, he tried to find the app.
He opened his eyes after what felt like a long blink. His head throbbed and it felt like there was a knife twisting in his stomach. He choked on the smell of shit and piss that saturated the air. He blinked to clear his vision but the room was dark. His blood ran cold as the years of military training started to kick in. He kept silent and slowly felt around to get an idea of where he might be. His prosthetic was gone, there was a slimy substance on most surfaces, he could hear rats squeak and scurry. He prayed he was wrong, but he put the clues together and figured he was in the sewer.
Pulling himself up against the wall, he gripped at his stomach as the twisting pain persisted. Like an insane hunger he’d never experienced before. “The fuck!?” He mumbled as he felt a sharp stab suddenly in his belly, the source directly from his own fingers. He rubbed at their tips, and felt that his nails had become extended and pointed. “What the fuck!?” His heart started to pound in his chest, and he struggled to hold back panic.
He didn’t have much more time to his own thoughts, as suddenly a light flashed on. It wasn’t a particularly bright bulb, but in the pitch black of the room, it may as well have been the sun. He blinked rapidly to combat the trauma to his eyes and clear his vision. He couldn’t see anyone, but his fear of being in the sewer was confirmed.
“Who’s there?” He choked out. There appeared to be no one, but someone had to have turned the light on.
“Oh poor Randolph. So scared when not surrounded by your bimbos and himbos.” A voice like grinding stones said from seemingly nowhere.
Ralph spun and looked around. He saw no one, even the rats were silent now.
“What did you do to me!?” Ralph yelled out, feeling a white hot anger rise within him.
“I made you one of us! One of the normies. I ripped you down from your pristine pedestal and humbled you. Now you’ll know the same pain me and my brethren have felt all our lives!”
Ralph turned to now see a creature standing where there was nothing before. Dark, beady eyes peered out from beneath a hood. Its skin was mottled gray, its teeth crooked and jagged. Its wicked smile was so wide it seemed like his lips would split. It held a mirror in its hand and raised it above its own head to meet Ralph’s gaze.
A cold numbness went through Ralph's body as he saw what he knew was him, but refused to believe it. His eyes were black and amber, his nose upturned and bat-like. His hair was just wisps of what was. His skin was splotchy. His nails were black and grown out like claws.
The creature beyond his own reflection was smiling and speaking. Making grand hand gestures. But all Ralph could hear was the beating of his own heart in his ears. All he could feel was the desire to drain the creature dry. The thought of opening its throat and drinking from it like a fountain. Ralph’s eyes darted down to the floor as the creature spoke to him. He keyed in on a broken brick in the path between him and it. When the creature turned and its eyes were not on him, he made his move.
“You’re stricken, so stupid, you can’t even speak-”
The final words he heard as his body lurched forward. He leapt and pushed off the ground with his hands like a feral beast. The creature’s eyes and his own met before the first blow was struck. All of that confidence was gone. Fear was on its face, soon followed by brick. The first strike was hard and threw the creature off balance, the mirror it held falling and breaking on the concrete. It sputtered out something but Ralph was quick to keep pressing the advantage, slamming the brick into its face again, bringing it to the ground. It was like hitting a sand bag. The contact was solid but it was obviously not doing the amount of damage he expected. Still, he was unrelenting. He was on top of the creature before it could get up. It tried to throw him off, and was almost successful, the scrawny frame of the creature hid its strength well. Whether through pure rage or muscle, Ralph stayed on top and beat the creature until the brick crumbled to dust.
“Get him off me!” The creature cried out in panic.
Ralph didn’t take the time to register the cry for help. He started to go in with fists where the brick failed. But his arm was stopped, an iron grip on his wrist catching him mid-swing. He tried to spin and punch the sudden second attacker, but they grabbed his other hand as well. This one was bigger and more monstrous than the other. A cleft lip revealed teeth befitting a cryptid rotting within its mouth. Its eyes were a bright red that almost shined. There was no nose on its face, not even nostrils. Its ears were elongated and several inches of lobe hung down from them.
The fight left Ralph as he realized he wasn’t walking away from this. He went limp in the new creature’s grasp. Somehow, it was able to speak clearly through the cleft lips and monstrous teeth.
“The kid is a shit and what he did wasn’t right. But I can’t let you kill him. That’s for someone else to decide.” His voice was soothing and warm. “Name’s Jorge.”
#vtm#vtm oc#vampire the masquerade#duskborn#thin blood#nosferatu#clan nosferatu#bweirdoctober#oc-tober#vamily#world of darkness#my baby boy#Ralph
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Missing Ontario
“Island Time” becomes less of a cheeky joke and more of a spiritual state of mind.
For the past couple years now Jethro and I have been using two weeks of summer to head out to Ontario and visit family. This was a new special development in my life, firstly because the 2022 trip coincided with my very first instance of Paid Time Off from a job; I had a mullet, I didn’t own a pair of formal shoes, and I felt like I was maybe finally “earning” adulthood. Secondly because I was going to meet Jethro’s extended family. For context, despite having known each other for a decade, I did not meet Jethro’s parents until one year prior. It’s an amount of personal privacy that I am both confounded by and envious of, and either way respect immensely.
The Ontario trip always feels like a bit of dream, but I would chalk most of that up to my lack of travel experience, even on the smaller scale of around my own country. So many things are so close to what I know and yet just slightly different. The buildings, the brands, even the flora seem like close approximations of what I would see in my day to day in BC. I think I know what variety of tree I’m looking at until I get a little closer and realize I have no clue. Like a dream that you believed to take place in your own house, only to wake up and realize you have no familiarity with the location your brain chose as a substitute. There seem to be some esoteric rules around the sale of liquor in Ontario, and despite having it explained to me multiple times I could not tell you for certain whether you are allowed to buy gin and beer at the same store, or what time in the evening you are now shit out of luck. Also why am I only allowed to by singles or cases? The half-sack eluded me.
There are three main stops on the trip: Topsy Farms on Amherst Island, cottage country just outside of Sydenham, and Toronto. And both trips where done in the same order as well, a kind of system shock shotgunning us right into rural farmland before heading to the more manicured wilderness of high-privacy cottage properties, all packed tightly together on the lake, and then back to bustle and urbanity in the city. It felt like a forced system reset before a 10 day long relaunching process, and an absolute joy to not see my phone at all for the first 3 to 5 days of the trip.
The whole of Amherst Island is beautiful and pastoral, with gravel roads and ivy trails clinging to old buildings. On the view from the ferry the landscape is dominated by multiple wind turbines, imposing giants that made me think of huge white pins being stuck into the map of the province; remember Here. We stay with Jethro’s godmother Leah, and we fall asleep to the sheep bleating in the distance, get up late in the morning for coffee, and then spend the rest of the day walking, swimming, and socializing with Leah and whoever else happens to stop by the farmhouse. “Island Time” becomes less of a cheeky joke and more of a spiritual state of mind. Sometimes when I find myself too wound up in my everyday life I try to access the bodily feeling of being back on the island - the wind of the bluffs cools my hot skin and dries my wet hair.
Veggie dogs on offer at the bluffs kitchenette.
The slow living continues as we move to our next destination, which is Grandpa Greg and Grandma Carol’s dream eco-cottage nestled just between Birch Lake and Desert Lake.
A quick intermission:
It was at this point in writing this piece that a couple things occurred. Firstly, I spent quite a lot of time on google maps trying to find the lakes the house was on, including using google street-view to travel along Canoe Lake Road to try and get my bearings; a trip that makes me carsick more often than not in person, and also apparently virtually through the computer screen. I had to go lay down for a moment. The other thing was that in my map searching I did find that there is a “Steely Dan Island” on Canoe Lake. Imagine the rest of this piece being written with Steely Dan playing in the background.
Rikki don’t lose that map pin.
Grandpa Greg is a green engineer who has designed a beautiful home with multiple eco friendly features — low flow and composting toilets, good airflow through the house, and the larder in the basement has an ambient temperature low enough to store perishables even in the summer. And keeps whiteclaws cool too, which was important to me. Most of this portion of the trip is spent, again, sleeping in, drinking, lounging, and socializing. But with a different feeling. You can be washing your coffee mug at the kitchen sink and look up to a family of kayakers in a space of water that up until that point you had imagined to be private property belonging entirely to the Allens. But my favourite piece of the house design is that every window is a picture frame, each looking out onto a carefully selected view of the property, framed by leaves and tree branches artfully encroaching into the view. Grandpa Greg told me during the first house tour that his direct inspiration was a trip on BC ferries, and the walls of the ship lined with large rectangular windows to capture natural landscapes as art. It was a different view of a BC Ferries ship than I had ever considered — I was (and still am) certain that every aspect of those particular experience are tailored to push my specific buttons. But the implementation of the picture windows at the cottage are effective — the kayakers are unexpected, but also impersonal; a painting where the subject could only have just appeared while you weren’t looking, and will likely be gone when you look again, off on their own business.
The time spent at the cottage is the driving reason for the excursion out to Ontario in the first place. 2022 was the year Jethro’s middle brother Fionn graduated high school, and then the youngest, Calum, in 2023. I was very much a guest on a trip specifically meant to circle wagons for the last available times before all three boys were off to their respective cities and busy with all the things young adults are. We played badminton, watched movies, and spent time in Sydenham eating poutine from the chip shop in front of the Foodland. And of course playing games.
I have developed a reputation among the family for being a euchre spectator. I did not grow up with much gaming culture in my household, the extent would be Scatagories or Pictionary with extended family on a holiday visit. We favoured creative-focus left brain games, and I could not tell you who was the winner of any one of them. Often there was no winner. So suffice it to say I was a bit out of my depth with real number and strategy capital “C” card games. I struggle with quick small math in general and my main objective in a game is usually just to have something to do with my hands while we’re chatting.
The Allens have had the police called on them for fights over bridge games.
But the atmosphere is thrilling. There’s something about sharing the space with someone who cares very deeply about what they’re doing, however small and fleeting it may be. It feels electric, and you can’t help but laugh and cheer for a hard fought victory, or even share the frustration of a difficult loss. I was much better at the off-road croquet that we paired with gigantic blue gin and tonics.
A croquet crime in progress.
It’s been hard saying goodbye at this point in the trip. We spend the majority of our time at Greg and Carol’s, and both times there’s been something final felt in the air, a moment when you realize that you’re watching your partner say goodbye to the children he remembers his younger brothers being. I hug everyone tight before we go, feeling less a stranger to them every time I experience the sadness of leaving.
And on to Toronto. And getting back to the city at this point feels right, forget a heartbreak by immersing yourself in the busyness. We stay with Jethro’s cousin Laurel and have between two and three days to visit museums, art galleries, and restaurants, often ending the nights with a glass of red wine on the porch with Laurel. Our most notable meal was in 2022 in the distillery district at El Catrin Destilleria, where Jethro and I got the drunkest we have ever been at a restaurant off of the largest and best spicy margaritas we’ve ever had. The food was amazing as well of course, I recommend the Lime Carlota icebox for dessert, but share it with a friend because it is massive.
Talking about experiencing Toronto is the part of the trip I tend to trust my perception the least in, partly because we’ve spent the least amount of time there, and also because I’m starting to feel like maybe the culture in any city is going to be more favorable than my current thoughts on Vancouver. The buildings are older, the amenities are closer together, and I watched a family walking down the street towards a public pool with the children already in their bathing suits, because they lived close enough to a community centre for that to be practical in the middle of the city. Laurel is able to walk to groceries, her daughter’s daycare, an endless amount of restaurants and coffee shops, and the beach of Lake Ontario.
On our last full day in the city Jethro and I walked down to the beach to start our day with a dip in the lake. It was cooler than it was on Amherst, but still pleasant, especially in comparison to glacier fed BC lakes. I was beginning to pine for my own bed at this point, excited for the opportunity to visit Casa Loma in the afternoon, but also growing exhausted from not ever being on totally familiar footing anywhere I went.
And then almost more quickly than I wished we were back on a plane home.
I mentioned in the previous post that we are going to Japan this year, and this is specifically in leu of Ontario. Fionn has moved out of their grandparent’s house, and is building a full adult life for himself in Toronto. He made a solo flight over to BC and stayed with us a couple days and we got to tour him around our city, and make bad choices in front of him we didn’t have the freedom to when he was a teenager. Calum is home for the summer and working at the chip shop we ate at while were visiting.
Jethro repeatedly “promised” me a 2024 trip that was about him and me, and not all about visiting his family, and we’ve had our eyes on Japan for a while. He definitely worried that he was overextending me with constantly meeting new people and bringing me all over the province. But I feel a real sense of loss not going back to Ontario this year. Last Christmas Grandpa Greg and Grandma Carol gifted us a photograph of the bluffs on Amherst Island; there’s an inherent knowing among people who have visited the spot that it’s a special place.
The point in summer we were over there in years before has past, and it seems like I’ve forgotten to do something very important.
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PSA...
I have struggled with if I should share this or not. I changed my mind many times over the past 16 hours, but it will likely eat at me if I don't... and I want to get out of this headspace. Then, I want to go back to doing what I came here for. Because right now, I'm so disgusted. I truly want no part of this shit ever again.
Like most of you, I am here for a love of a story and characters and because I found joy in reading/writing and sharing with you. As time went on, I stayed because of a community found. We have some of the loveliest, kindest souls in this fandom. I've always said 1% of the fandom caused 99% percent of the problems.
Consider these lessons learned. Mistakes made. Things I've witnessed. Things I've had done to me, and some that I've done. Ramblings... a wish list I never expect to be realized. I do think you can enjoy your time here; because 90% of the time, I do. But to do so, you have had to tune out the noise, check your ego, use mirrors, and focus on the few people that make your time here magical. People who remember why we came here to begin with. For those people, I'm so grateful. You're half the reason I'm still here.
Anon hate is best deleted.
I'm going to share an interesting link later; not shocking...but shocking. It's best deleted. It took me a long time to learn that, but that's what I do now. It's what I did last night. But I have to ask... does everyone who sends nasty, hateful shit anonymously end with, "And people wonder why the fandom is dying?" YEAH! Because of YOU! lol Self-awareness is a good thing. It boggles my mind how people do horrible things (and sending anon hate is always a horrible thing) and somehow feel they're righteous. Babes, if you think you were treated unjustly, speak with your full face and let your voice be heard. Sorry, anon hate is ALWAYS childish, pathetic, and wrong.
Fandom Divison.
I think it is SO FUCKED UP. And the fact that the majority of us are grown-ass adults makes it 10 times worse, but after nearly 2 years here, I can say it's new, and I don't see it changing. I used to want to help fix it, but I no longer think it's worth the effort, and trying can honestly even make things worse. Too many are in love with the chaos. Too many people hate too many others for the most ridiculous reasons, it's not going to stop.
I'm well aware when I start an event, a good number of people won't participate solely because it's me running it. Hell, many people here won't share their bestie's profile if they're highlighted on a side blog Kathy & I run because Kathy & I run it. That's not a poor me moment, not only because I don't care but because I know I'm not alone. As wrong as it is, everyone deals with it.
I want you to read this because it's important:
I do not know one person on this hellsite that has started a fandom event that has NOT gotten at least some hate for it.
Read that again, just for trying to do something nice. It takes a thick skin to "survive," it shouldn't be this way in a place we come to have fun, but sadly, it does.
Some advice:
Everyone - and I mean everyone - me included... we're not mindreaders. If you are, stop wasting your time here and go profit off that shit. That anon you got? You are SO SURE you know who it is? You don't. I mean, you might be right... but with the way people play games here? There is a good chance you don't. I've done this shit myself. When I'm wrong, I say it, and I learn from it. And this is a lesson learned. Unless you're tracking that IP, baby, you don't know. And if you do start tracking IPs, fasten up... you're going to be in for some shocks... and not the good kind.
STOP the hypocrisy. You don't get to have a minor meltdown and put someone on the do not engage/enemy for life list because their cousin in a fandom 3 times removed is using a FC that you used once in 2017... and their cousin has no clue... then a month later defend your BFF when they do the same thing. If you slam someone because their MC got a cat, because your MC got a cat first (and clearly, you're the ONLY one in the fandom whose MC can have a cat <- sarcasm) don't get pissed when someone thinks you had your MC get married at Christmas just because they did it first. Maybe, in addition to stopping the hypocrisy, we should start giving others the benefit of the doubt? If we expect it, then maybe we should give it, too. Again, this applies to all... even me... so stop playing the fandom's favorite game of "I know who she's talking about." Trust. You don't.
Stop worrying about other people's HCs. None of our characters are real, but the people behind them are. Don't like their ideas? You don't have to. The world doesn't exist to please any of us. Please learn what fandom is. We're here to make canon our own. Don't like it? Don't read it. Don't like someone? Don't interact with them. But don't send them hate. Don't tell others they can't befriend them. Just ... be an adult.
If you want to read someone, read them. Want to reblog? Do it. Afraid someone will be pissed about it? Fuck them, and you really may want to consider if you want them in your orbit if they are putting this pressure on you. For the record, I will never give a shit about who anyone reads or doesn't read... this wasn't a life lesson... this is one I've always known, and can't believe we're so petty about here.
Lose the goddamn victim complexes... and to those who are dealing with people with victim complexes... watch closely. That shit's not normal. And don't waste your precious time trying to convince people of who you are. Be genuine. Be direct (god, we need more of that here), and be yourself. Everyone won't like you, and that's ok because the ones who should be around you will.
I wrote this to get it off my chest. I'll probably delete it later. I don't want comments. I set it so it can't be reblogged. If people want to share it... TRUST this fandom knows how to screenshot VERY well. I'll make them work for it.
I'm just so sick and fucking tired of the nonsense here... aren't you?
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Hi! I’m not sure if you’ve answered something like this before but I was wondering how you first realised that Loki was there for you. I’m currently trying to connect with a deity (I’m not doing a great job at the moment because executive dysfunction) but I’ve been struggling quite a bit and I’ve only had one experience a while back that might be considered a brief interaction so I was wondering what your experience in this sort of area might have been like and how you managed to grow closer to Loki.
Omg hi hi hi my first Anonymous question 
This is so fun !
Well I started worshiping Loki maybe two and a half months ago and I’m still pretty new
Even being a a Lokean for years there’s still new stuff to learn
Never feel like a deity isn’t listening or isn’t there
They are ! I promise!
For me I found Loki when I was in a very low low spot in my life . I randomly one day started to love marvel loki (I didn’t like marvel at all had no intentions on ever liking it) then I sorta had that whole phase ..then I found out it was all based in norse mythology
So I read up on it and honestly I felt to drawn to loki and I just had to learn more . I began reading about people’s stories with him and realizing most of the symbols (animals ,food, sounds , elements) that he was associated with are all things that were in my life constantly.
So I then made a huge decision to break from my horrible religious trauma (my family strongly believes in god and hates gays and stuff like that’s soooo…being bisexual and genderfluid and lokean.. they didn’t like that)
and I can say that’s probably the best thing I’ve every done - like I feel like I can breathe and be my authentic self.
I realized he was there mostly because I keep fucking getting one fly that won’t fucking leave me alone (it’s actually bothering me rn and I have no fucking clue where it came from when this house is clean so I’m gonna say this is definitely Lokis silly ass)
Also I had such a huge love for red foxes out of nowhere like I just adore them and that’s also another animal associated with him
And sometimes I’ll just be drawn to things in stores or anywhere really and it almost always has something to do with his mischievous lil ass
But other then that I’ve downloaded an app for norse runes and stuff and I’ve started a journey there .
I try my best to be open to not only Loki but the ones that he surrounded himself with- like his children or odin thor etc..
Loki is a funny lil shit and really will be protective
I’ve found that out the hard way when
I came out to my family and told them I felt very misunderstood and depressed and unloveable talked out my abuser and stuff like that
And they all sorta called me crazy and yknow stupid shit like that
But I went out side to bawl my eyes out and my mom was texting me and it was sorta overwhelming and my phone was at 60% I chatted with my pal Roman and that thing shut down…literally turned off and I just sat there in the dark scared and anxious and then there was this bizzare calm like it was ok ..like a parents hug would fix whatever was going on and just as I thought about how I suddenly felt better the wind started to sort blow a cool breeze on my face and when I tell you that was like the best feeling after sobbing and ur eyes burn and face stings ..
But I look back and think ..yeah that was Loki
I try to get closer to him by learning about him more .
try traditional meals that they might like
Or listen to music that is associated with them or reminded u of them
Even a simple “hey thanks for always being there you’re really great !”
Or
“Good morning !” “Goodnight!”
Write poetry for them and draw for them
Wear something that reminds you of them
Or even a pendant or something of that sort
I just recently bought a bunch of lokean stuff
Candle
Necklace
Books
It’s all about patience and believing that they will be there
I can even leave some good Etsy shops I shop from that u might enjoy if u happen to worship loki they have good stuff
If you ever need a friend or anything I’m always open to dms
I have instagram it’s lokeanheart
Also I recommend this song
It’s a pretty good song
#lokean#norse loki#norse magic#norse mythology#norse pagan witch#norse paganism#norse religion#norse witch#norse god loki#norse runes#loki deity#loki worship#loki devotee#anon ask
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I know I haven't made anything since the Sunday/Nova picture, and I am still slowly trying to work on the second part of the 'prologue' to post (I have no clue what I'll write next for the Honkai Star Fail anthology or if I'll try to write something else, we'll cross that bridge when I finally burn this one), but in between holidays and IRL stuff, I've become decently obsessed with Pressure so I'm going to ramble a little bit about some of my fascination. Spoilers and unnecessary long-windedness below haha
Now, I say 'decently obsessed' because Pressure hasn't really been an all-consuming obsession like some of my other hyperfixations where I NEED to look things up or go through everything else I feel like I'll go rabid. Rather, when not playing, it feels more like it lurks at the edge of my mind, tinging my thoughts with continued mild curiosity like a light craving. Still, after many failed attempts to reach the end of the game and potentially learn more, I both used a couple revives and read into the lore on what I think is the most 'official' wiki (my knowledge is that no one involved with the actual creation of the game is involved with any of the wikis, the one I read just has the most detail and sources)
From personal experience of the game, I didn't even know that half of what I was experiencing was entirely new/updated considering how recently I began playing, such as increased difficulty reaching the end with traps and more monsters/hostiles (which made me feel less bad about my consistent failures lmao) and a new revive area with revive animation involving Lady Death (which, I revived twice on one run and she beat the shit out of me the second time). Game-wise, it doesn't really feel like it gives a lot of lore to the specific events of said game, but maybe I also just hadn't been lucky enough to come across the specific rooms/documents required
Lore-wise, obviously inspired by a few things, but none of the creators ever claimed that Pressure was entirely original and have been entirely forthright about inspiration. SCP Foundation is one of them, which I used to be fascinated by growing up myself, but it's one of those things where it's become overgrown in a sense, so I fell out of it. Pressure hits that same spot while being far more manageable in scope
Anyways, as fascinating as all of it is, the part that stuck out to me the most (aside from casually finding out about the Banlands and what seems like an actual angel) is the fact that the Player can revive when other Expendables couldn't. Now, upon reading the lore page at first, I registered the name Mr. Lopee but I thought that was the name of the Urbanshade founder guy, so it kind of made sense if the founder picked some poor random schmuck to be able to revive if he wanted. However, why waste the resources on the Player and not someone more 'valuable'? I didn't particularly think too much into it at the time of initial reading
And then I read the lore page again today and realized that Mr. Lopee isn't the founder, a Mr. Shade is
Mr. Lopee is an unknown entity that has some sort of control over Sebastian and finds the Player intriguing enough to help revive each death, making Sebastian debrief them on how they died. Whether the Player has some innate ability to revive that Mr. Lopee takes advantage of and merely triggers it or something else, not sure, but it just intrigues me a lot
I don't know exactly why I'm making this post, but I feel like I just needed to get some thoughts out of my system haha. I like the utilization of revival/death into game lore rather than it merely being a game mechanic is fascinating, but I also understand why it wouldn't work in a lot of games. While reading about Pressure lore, it caught me off guard to see beings of death and at least one confirmed angel, but incorporating these concepts into it allows for a more logical through line for revival plot relevance
In particular, I think it's also interesting thinking of it from Sebastian's point of view
Barring his document/background, imagine causing an entire facility to shutdown, releasing all kinds of contained creatures and basically turning the entire place into a deathtrap to both hurt the corporation that essentially bought you and bribe the poor suckers forced to try and clean up your mess with supplies in exchange for information in a data hoard to hurt the corporation further on escape. And THEN, I'm not certain how Mr. Lopee/Sebastian's whole deal works, this entity that you reluctantly have to comply with for reasons just gives you a Ferryman's quarter (or a bunch, idk) and tells you that you're bringing some seemingly random person back from Lady Death as well as briefing them on a cause of death to help them survive going through the facility again
So you're forced to bring back and help this Player help the corporation that captured you and experimented on you to a certain extent. There's nothing stopping you from injuring or killing the Player yourself to try and stall, but you know that you'll just have to drag them back and help them again
And, from the Player's perspective, it has to be jarring and painful to die and be brought back to life multiple times to complete a task that can feel absolutely impossible. Some of the hostiles don't even leave a body, so your entire existence has to be reformed or rematerialized
Idk, just random thoughts that took way too long to write down, haha
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Ok ok ok fuck you, were starting it.
And by it, I mean this blog - the way I just yapped to myself for twenty minutes in the shower about what to say - and now I have no idea.
But I guess I should introduce myself - even though - holy fuck I'm tired of introductions, like Jesus, just this last week of school, it's just constant! "Hi!, Hello!" "What's your name and pronouns?!? Oh, how about fuck you and fuck this!!! :D" Like it's exhausting I do think that's more a me thing than a general thing, like "Hi, here I am, here you go, you can forget me now."
But either way, my name is Rodbei... because that's the normal way and I am trying my best not to dox myself, my pronouns are ??/!! in the way that I have no clue and do your best!
I am doing this because I am seventeen and I just moved out and this is probably a very important time in my life I'm supposed to look back on?? But regardless I can't remember shit for shit and I should write it down so here we go:
Today I had 3 alarms - 5:00, 5:30, and 6:00 because I have to bike to school at 7:30 and be there at 8:00 and it sucks? I mean it's okay but ughhh no one likes autumn Mondays. It was cold and I didn't want to get up, but today was a good day because I could eat breakfast (normally eating breakfast is nauseating and ends with throwing up in a trashcan). So chocolate "musli," banana, and coffee were my start this morning. Also watched Smallish Beans' newest video because I am actually five years old ffs.
I met up with... should I make fake names?? Fine, I guess, I'll introduce my best "school" friend... umm... umm Red?!??... I'm going to forget that but okay. Me and Red biked to school together; Red had an electric bike while I struggled on my normal one. It was nice though since the past week has just been (ok I'm at a mixed art school so half the time we're at a normal school and the other part we're at an art school) and this past week we've been at the art school. But I live literally 30 seconds away from that school so no biking, but honestly biking is nice... downhill - too bad my school school is at the top of a giant hill -
But otherwise, school was fine. Two new students, though, which doesn't really change anything because I am a loser with zero social ability. Like, I swear I have never felt so out of place at a freaking ART SCHOOL and I am normally the art kid. Like, WHAT. But two new students, an emo kid, and some blond girl. Maybe I'll talk to the emo kid, but he reminds me of people who are too cool to try to make friends. And I am the most AWKWARD person ever. Like, I don't know how I do it. It's like a talent where I just cannot do normal small talk.
That was the interesting part of school. Red went home early because they're stupid and always a little bit sick. We had 4 subjects: movie, English, history, and math. They all sucked apart from the movie one.
But, oh my freaking god, you would think the teachers know how to teach neurodivergent kids. But they still make us sit still for 50 minutes while they talk at a board. NO ONE IS UNDERSTANDING SHIT.
My lunch today was a ham and cheese sandwich, an apple, a cereal bar, and a Caprisun because I'm lazy.
After school, I raced home and ate some crappy noodles. Then I watched some Remadora bloopers because I realized I still had access to TT Patreon. YIPPE. That was the highlight of my day, I think. LMAO.
After that, Red called me, and we went shopping and made tomato soup. I bought bread forgetting I froze some earlier like an idiot, and I bought the amazing, the legendary, CANNED WHIPPED CREAM. I was never allowed to have that as a kid. YIPPE YIPPE YIPPE.
I cleaned Red's room because I'm built weird while they made us tomato soup. We ate on the floor, and I did the dishes like I always do.
Then I came back here and rotted on TikTok. Also, I planned with Monke because it's an inside joke that we could maybe go to a Girl in Red concert in two weeks. But we're both broke. YIPPE.
Also, there's a party Friday that I'm only scared to go to because I'm going alone. And I'm gonna go home this weekend and maybe watch a movie with, let's say, Monke and Bunny.
God, they would hate me for that.
Song of today is: "I Wanna Be Your Girl" by Girl in Red.
-Rodbei 16-09-2024
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After sleeping on it, I didn’t hate last night’s SVU but I think the main issue I did have with it and that I’ve had with some others in the past is that they sometimes spoonfeed their audience as if we aren’t capable of thinking for ourselves. When they do parallels to things like Lewis they go too hard at it. They make it too obvious and give us so many parallels to the point where it’s like they’re just copying almost like they are more focused on sparking outrage rather than getting a point across that adds to character development. because i think they were attempting to correct past wrongs in a way? and show healing but that point was missed because they picked such outrageous parallels that people couldnt overlook those things to see the rest. I don’t think they should never do a Lewis parallel…unfortunately as awful as it was it was something that happened to Olivia and healing isn’t linear so it’s gonna come up from time to time. I just think they should be more SUBTLE about it rather than making it so obvious that it’s a parallel to the point that it’s triggering for people because it feels like it’s just shock value(they’re picking the most obvious parallels they can find). They could’ve accomplished what I think they might’ve been trying to without doing that.
Like…don’t pick the crazy juror. Everyone remembers that. Don’t pick him representing himself. Everyone remembers that. Pick some random small detail that no one is gonna remember unless they rewatched that arc within the last week and a half. Something none of us really pick up on until the end when there’s a resolution and then we’re like “oh wait! That’s what they were doing. I didn’t realize but I see now. I’m glad they fixed that. I’m glad Olivia got to have that moment of closure.” Make me THINK in other words. Make me have to be a bit confused at first and critically analyze what’s in front of me. +and make predictions. Not be exactly sure that’s where you’re going with it. OC doesn’t spoonfeed us which is why sometimes their plots are confusing. You don’t have to go so hard with the parallels. Pick some random thing and then at the very end Olivia mentions it in therapy or to Fin and we’re all like “oh wait I didn’t even think about that and now all this stuff that happened makes sense that was good writing”. And don’t make it have no point. I did really like the ending though I just wish the ending wasn’t overshadowed by such blatant parallels. Even if we didn’t get a Lewis convo with Elliot I would’ve either liked to think we were leading up to one or see Olivia working through something/talking through something to encourage Maddie that she’d get through this because she dealt with those feelings (because maybe Maddie says something to her and it’s small enough that we didn’t even remember Olivia having those same thoughts until the end etc). She recognized as something as part of her own journey and she’s finally addressing it at the end because of that random thing that happened in the episode and then it wouldn’t be so blatant and shocking and obvious and we’d be like finally we are getting some healing and something is being addressed that hasn’t been before yay continuity! Rather than just blatantly tell me this is a parallel. Make me guess. You don’t have to spoonfeed me I’m an adult I can think for myself. Make me go ohhhh I see what you did there I wasn’t expecting it and it took me a minute to get it but now I do and it’s not one of the most obvious offensive ones like making a female juror a nutjob who wants to sleep with the suspect. We all remember bronwyn freed. It makes it more compelling when we have to think. When we go I didn’t remember that shit at all until your context clues led me to realize it and then it made it a more compelling story than if you’re just picking an obvious one. Be more subtle so I could pick up on the good parts.
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10 Fandoms, 10 Characters, 10 People
Thanks for the tag @jaywalkers <3. I love your list of characters, you’ve got great taste : )
Rules: name 10 of your favourite characters from 10 different fandoms, then tag 10 people to do the same
1) Andrew Minyard from All For the Game
My blorbo of all time probably. No character has given me brainrot and writing inspiration the way he does and likely no character ever will. This post sums up his appeal perfectly
2) Lan Wangji from Mo Dao Zu Shi
My newest blorbo from my most recently joined fandom. What can I say, I’m a sucker for incredibly queer competent stoic prob neurodivergent men that are absolutely insane about one person. When I watch the MDZS donghua, I literally have to pause every time he comes on the screen just so I can stare at him a bit, so you could say I’m a bit obsessed
3) Kim Theerapanyakul from KinnPorsche
He’s this weird little guy that is simultaneously the most competent character in the show and the biggest cringe-fail loser. He looks so suave and cool on the surface with his whole Taylor Swift by day mafia prince detective by night thing but then you realize he’s actually a complete nerd with a whole ass literal murder conspiracy board hidden behind a giant selfie portrait of himself and I love him so much (also he’s played by Jeff Satur, who makes my aesthetic attraction senses go haywire, but that’s neither here nor there)
4) Kyuzo from Samurai 7
My 1st fictional crush and prob my earliest blorbo. My type in favorite fictional male character (hypercompetent stoic character that doesn’t talk much with bonus points for iconic hair) can 100% be attributed to him. His story was the earliest villain redemption arc I can remember encountering in media (this was the 1st anime I ever watched so I was like 4 or 5 when I 1st saw this guy) and so for me I always think of him when I see people talking about iconic redemption arcs (sorry Zuko)
5) Midorima Shintarou from Kuroko no Basket
At the peak of my high school sports anime phase, this guy was my favorite. He’s tall, he’s green, he’s an anime glasses character™️, he’s tsundere, he’s prissy, he’s weird af, he’s got one of the most bonkers basketball skills ever, and he’s even an astrology girlie. What’s not to love
6) Merlin from BBC Merlin
BBC Merlin is the fandom that sucked me in at a time where I thought I was growing out of fandom and fanfic (spoiler alert: I very much was not) and it’s responsible for completely changing my relationship with fandom into something much more intense than it was previously. And it’s all thanks to this funky skinny wizard man who for whatever reason captivated me enough that I read hundreds of thousands of fan-created words about him for nearly a year and a half
7) Jasnah Kholin from The Stormlight Archive
She’s one of the rare canonically asexual female characters, and she’s even from a major fantasy book series too! I fixated on this character long before I knew I was ace (though perhaps that should’ve been a clue lol), mostly because I just thought she was so cool and I found her whole “why would I want a relationship when I’m busy with all this shit to study” attitude so relatable
8) Katara from Avatar: The Last Airbender
I wanted to be her so badly when I was a kid y’all have no idea. She just made such an impression on me because she’s so cool and so strong but also unapologetically and obviously feminine and that really struck a chord with young me and is prob the reason why I didn’t really have a “not like the other girls” phase cuz she was revolutionary for little me’s idea of how a “girl” can be. To this day she is the character that to me has the coolest powers ever
9) Cassandra of Troy from Greek Mythology
It’s prob weird to include her but I was a real greek mythology girlie (in that I was into it before Percy Jackson came out) and Cassandra has always my favorite. The tragedy of her story has always been very appealing to me and upsettingly relatable in a lot of ways
10) Kym Ladell from Purple Hyacinth
Ms. Kym one of those characters that’s ostensibly the comedic relief except nope she’s hiding oceans of pain under her smile. She’s got trauma and a tragic backstory that she hides from the rest of the main characters in one of the strongest “this is fine” performances you’ve ever seen
Tagging: @stabbyfoxandrew @alcego @paradoxolotl @halfpintpeach @justadreamfox @wulfrann @quensty @ittyybittybaker @seasy33 @nanatsuyu
#moonie writes#aftg#mdzs#kinnporsche#samurai 7#knb#bbc merlin#greek mythology#purple hyacinth#moonie posting#atla#stormlight archive
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22 February 2023
I walked into my apartment earlier so relieved that I live alone but the irony is that now I wish someone was here next to me. It’s half past midnight and I’m writing in the dark -- as a lot of my sadder posts back in the day used to start.
I genuinely think it’s the hormones (all the stress in the beginning pushed my period out for almost 50 days) But finally, after watching and feeling everyone go through their cycles, I finally get to feel the peak of mine.
This is pretty up there with the most vicious flows I’ve ever had, the pain and fatigue haven’t helped either. But what gets me are the mood swings. One minute I'm making everyone laugh and the next I hate everyone’s stupidity. For a moment I feel invincible and the next, wrecked, vulnerable and alone.
This is the first night I’ve heavily thought about you in over a week now and it’s because my gut tells me you’re with someone new. Again, sure it could be the hormones and sure maybe it might not be serious, but a wave came over me.. just like the same wave that knew to ask you if you had slept with anyone while we were figuring our shit out. It started earlier this evening and I haven’t been able to shake it since.
I’m mad that I’ve enabled myself to feel this way, I’m mad that I even care, but most of all I’m mad that you still have a hold on my heart like this. I know it’s just one bad night, and I know it’s barely past a month since you broke up with me, but I’m better than this and if I were giving advice to a friend, I’d tell them to just drop it.
Stressing over assumptions as if it was already truth has never done good things for me -- or for anyone for that matter. All it’s done is add more anxiety and distract me from focusing on myself and my controllables. At this point I really shouldn’t care about what you’ve been up to. Wishing you the best is one thing but wanting to keep tabs on you is something I’m not interested in doing. You made it very clear that it shouldn’t even be an option, either.
There is no good reason for me to throw myself in the line of fire by trying to gather clues to questions I don’t want to know the answers to, and there’s no good reason for me to linger on this any longer. I’m squashing this now. I used to think that I had to know everything ahead of time in order to feel protected and prepared, but now I'm realizing that my strength is in the control of my reactions.
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Wow... What a journey these 3 years have been.... It has been a while. Hi again little corner of the net.
Not sure were to start.... I just read what I wrote in previous posts and I realize I didn't mentioned any of my daily self development work, maybe I will go in detail in the future, but after reading my entries I can say with confidence that it has certainly paid off and I am so glad I started to write in here, in a way, this has been a great outlet to "let things go".
After 3 years I feel a lot less melodramatic, I have been now years without feeling suicidal, the bullshit of others are not affecting me the way they used to.... My focused shifted, giving little to no space for bs and drama, even if it tries to crawl back due to external sources, I'm doing everything to move on quickly from it.
I still have my AIWS but have been coping a lot better with it. I'm actively working to create coping mechanisms against my avPD, my social anxiety had lessened, I still struggle with my OCD, C-PTSD and my Hypnopompic Hallucinations but they no longer rule my life, they are side demons that come to say hi from time to time and I've learned to not engage so much with them. It's not easy but the less time, space and attention I give them, the more I am at peace.
Sometimes I feel I am back in the hole until I read what I read here and realize how much progress I've made. I am so grateful to myself for not give up on me.
Those that were disrespecting me (well sexualizing me) are no longer in my circle of friends. Nothing personal to them but I don't wish to be surrounded by people like that. My intimacy has become sacred and reserved for very few. I am slowly working on surrounding myself with people that resonate with my values, morals and that accept me for who I am and not what I am useful for. I still have here and there people trying to push those boundaries of respect but I've learned who to let it and who to keep at bay, without drama nor issues at least in my end.
A year and a half ago I attended this boundaries workshop and the analogy that the guy shared made my entire perception change. He said: "Imagine that we are like a beautiful house surrounded by a wonderful garden and yard and it's surrounded by a white fence, the white fence is our boundaries; it is not agressive, it is not dangerous, it doesn't harm anyone, it simply separates our property from our neighbors property and whoever trespasses them we have the right to ask them to leave the premises or make sure they don't enter our property again". This analogy made me understand that I am not offending anyone with my boundaries and it would be absurd if anyone gets offended by me having a "white fence". We simply don't let others pee, shit on or stomp on our flowers, it's simple. I felt so much more freedom and I was able to approach my boundaries from a non-defensive approach and ask people to leave the premises or move my entire property away from individuals that don't understand that "no means no" in different areas of my life.
My only exception is the one that is the most difficult to detach from. I still have no clue how to proceed with this one but step by step, for now my priority is to make sure I remain stable internally regardless of what people do around me and keep my focus on what's important to me at this time.
I am at a stage where I am fed up of being in the shadows.... Slowly but surely I am letting myself being seen even if it terrifies me that some people will try to harm me or try to sabotage me by being myself. But enough is enough. This year I am claiming my power back and I am more and more surrounded by communities who encourage me, believe in me and support me.
So, today was scripting day and wow... I realized so much ... I wrote so much and I want to take my time to make other entrances on subjects I haven't touched.
All that to say that progress is made, I still am struggling with my biggest flaw which is loyalty and endurance of unfairness, but I'll get there. One step at a time. I am learning to be kind to myself and not judge myself too much on my journey. I know I am doing what I am capable at in the present moment and I am doing a great job even if sometimes I forget. This is all that matters, that I am not motionless in the same problems but rather untangling the huge mess there is due to so much that has happened all these years.
I may not be completely out of the waters, but I am no longer drowning and the water is now at my waist, not over me. I can breathe now, even if sometimes I am pulled back down the water, I no longer allow myself to drown.
Thank you, inner me, for never give up. I'm so grateful and want to imprint this here in my vent corner.
I'm glad I can write for once without being with heavy heart.
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╔══════════════╗
AOT SQUIRTING HEADCANONS
╚══════════════╝
request by: @multi-fandoms-stuff
"can I pretty request an imagine for aot eren, erwin, levi, connie, armin, jean, reiner, bertolt, ymir, and mikasa about them making there s/o squirt for the first time and there reaction, have the reader get all shy and trys to hide her face??"
notes: ahhh thank you so much for requesting, again im very sorry for the delay and late update, im back on writing now!
warnings: smut, squirting, overstimulation, bodily fluids
.・゜゜・ ・゜゜・.
Eren Jeager:
You and Eren have got it going on for a few hours with him and his titan stamina plunging into you without letting you rest for a minute. You haven't even kept track of how long it's been or how many times he's made you cum that night, only focusing on his cock stretching you open and the way he is holding your throat. It's not long until your next orgasm arrives but oh, this time it feels different and suddenly you're squirting all over him and his cock as he keeps fucking you deeper and harder.
"Eren, I need to clean up, Im so sorry I didn't know this would happen, oh my-" You wail while pushing your hands over your face but instead of him stopping he just snaps his hips against yours harder and says:
"No. You're doing it again" Needless to say, you do, indeed.
Erwin Smith:
On your break you had snuck inside Erwin's office to steal a couple of kisses which soon ended up with you laying on the table all over his paperwork and him taking out his emotions on your poor pussy, to the point where you swear someone's going to walk in with a noise complain- not just due to your loud moans- but also due to the fact that his unsteady table is repeatedly creaking on the wooden floor.
"Erwin, I'm so close, Erwin I-ERWIN" You scream as you realize what is actually happening and not being able to hold it in. Both of you are freaking the fuck out. On any other situation he would find this really hot and treat you so good for squirting on him but you just came all over important papers which needed to be delivered awfully soon and neither has zero idea of what the hell you're supposed to do now. You freaking out must have been even louder than your sex noises and now you're adamant that everyone heard.
This was a different walk of shame
Levi Ackerman:
He had just changed the sheets to your shared bedroom when you walked in half naked after your shower, instantly igniting something inside him. The past few weeks had been really tiring for both and the only way to take your exhaustion away was having you bounce on his cock until you were in tears and shaking.
"You're gonna cum baby? I'm so fucking close too" He whispered in your ear like a lullaby in-between heavy breaths as he moved your hair out of your face and locked his eyes with yours. His movements were so gentle and passionate until you both grew desperate for your release and soon he was guiding your hips faster and sloppier while smacking your ass. It wasn't long until you started shaking while he filled you up. After you both came down from your highs you gained awareness of your surroundings and immediately shrunk to yourself.
"What are you hiding away for?"
"You just changed the sheets"
"I can always put another ones" He said awkwardly as you tried to shift away from his lap, when he pulled you right back in "It would be a shame if i changed them while they're only this wet. We might as well just ruin them completely"
Connie Springer:
Sasha and Jean were sleeping on the couch next to you after a nice dinner and Connie was feeling really turned on, right from the start of the night when you felt his fingers creeping up inside your panties and circling over your clit before teasing their way inside.
"Can we at least go somewhere isolated? I feel bad for-" You choked trying not to make a sound as his finger where now dipping in and out of your cunt in a desperate need of feeling your walls clench around them "Connie-"
"It's too comfy here, try to be more quiet baby" He whispered back as he lifted your skirt and pushed his tip inside not letting it all in but rather slipping it in and then pulling out and rubbing on your clit until you felt yourself cumming. Hard.
You were trying so hard to not make a noise until you realized what actually happened and turned around to look at your boyfriend in shock with heat rising up your cheeks. This cheeky motherfucker was looking back at you with the biggest smirk before plunging his entire length inside. Definitely proud of himself... And you definetely have to clean up before a) Jean and/or Sasha wake up b) Captain Levi haunts your dreams.
Jean Kirschstein:
Jean and you had been sent on different expenditions for the week so it was safe to say that you really missed spending time with each other. And him inside you.
Once he closes his room's door he already has you pushed against the wall and taking you right there while standing up. Jean is the romantic type but missing you made him desperate for your touch. You were sure you were seeing stars at one point, the way he pressed against you was magnificent and it just kept getting better and better until you felt the bubble inside you burst and soon your juices were everywhere on the floor. Everywhere.
You instantly felt like hiding away and audibly apologized while he still fucked the shit out of you. Confused he started slowing down and voiced his concern over your sudden apology until he realized what went down and blushed. 'Thats it, its over' you thought. Suddenly the most unexpected thing happened. A huge smile crept on his face "I made you squirt! Oh my god you look so hot, I bet Eren would never be able to make a girl sq-" He exclaimed before you kicked his leg.
Armin Arlet:
Armin is such a sweet young man. He had you laid on the bed for him as he slowly fucked into you, gasping in between kisses and telling you just how much he loves you. Gaining more confidence in yourself your moans became louder and louder and soon his pace changed into sharp and quick thrusts.
Your orgasm hit you like a freight train and cherished the way he was the one to make you scream and breathe like that. He felt so blessed that you chose him as the man to have inside your velvet walls and-
Why is the bed wet? Did the rain get through the wooden roof? Why are you trying to hide away? Armin genuinely had no clue.
"Is everything okay baby? Do you feel uncomfortable with the waters?" He asked as more color rose up to your cheeks, refusing to look in his eyes as you awkwardly tried to explain what had happened was not a leak in the roof "What did you say?"
"I squirted"
"Oh"
"Yes"
"This is way more exciting than a leaking roof...Way more"
Reiner Braun:
Reiner is an emotional man and it shows when you get intimate with each other. One time he has you on all fours, with a finger deep in your asshole as he rails your guts.
"Noone else can fuck you like that fuck- what is it baby, is there anyone else that will fuck you this good? Have you crying from their cock? Use your words princess come on" He gasped as his own tears were threatening to fall, seeking emotional validation as well as pleasure as you tried to form a coherent sentence while sobbing "Didn't think so darling, you're such a whore for me"
And in the heat of the moment the offspring of his actions and words erupted from your throat as a loud scream and your juices squirted all over his lap for the first time. The sighting made Reiner cum in an instant and neither had the energy to talk about it, until he embraced you tightly from behind and thanked you for allowing him to be with you and sharing your most vulnerable moment with him.
Berthold Hoover:
His cock felt so good as you bounced on it . In a way it was therapeutic and for the past 7 minutes you've been in this position you've felt constantly on the edge and your thighs burned until sweet release washed you over and soon you were clasping poor Bert's shoulders as you screamed and squirted all over him while he pulled his dick out of your spent pussy and slapped its head on your clit as he watched more liquid come out.
After your orgasm died down a little, instant shame washed over you and you tried hopping away before he hugged you tightly and swayed you without realizing that hes accidentally rubbing you on his cock again and that you are about to pass out....
Ymir:
Ymir is a big tease. A really big one. Proof being her refusing to finally push her fingers inside your soaked slit, instead choosing to just rub up and down while slipping half an inch inside before you grew desperate and moved your own fingers to your clit and rubbing vigorously.
"Fuck" You heard her exclaim before plunging two of her fingers inside "Don't stop touching yourself baby, wanna make you cum like that" She commanded as her fingers dove in and out as fast as she could while you screamed under her touch. Your orgasm came fast and before you knew it, Ymir was soaking wet with your juices . "Never knew my girl could squirt, makes me wish I ate you out instead" She says before diving in.
Mikasa Ackerman:
It was a quiet night with Mika as you laid on your bed next to each other. Your conversation ended with your fingers in her pussy and hers in yours. Both struggled with the pace as you chased your release and her moans in your ear caused you to lose control and instantly let go and clench around her fingers as clear liquid soaked the sheets right beneath you and she turned her head to look at you in awe.
"I'm so sorry Mikasa I didn't know this would-"
"Do you think I can do this too?" She asked with flushed cheeks and an innocent look on her face.
"Eh? Squirt?" You asked and before she had the chance to nod you took out the dildo from your drawer and plunged it deep into her dripping pussy.
#erwin smith#eren jeager#levi ackerman#armin arlet#jean kirstein#connie springer#berthold hoover#reiner braun#ymir#mikasa#erwin smith x reader#eren jeager x reader#levi x reader#jean x reader#connie x reader#armin arlet x reader#ymir x reader#mikasa ackerman x reader#aot#attack on titan#snk#shingeki no kyoujin#aot x reader#snk x reader#smut#aot smut#aot headcanons#eren smut#levi smut
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Karl x Fem!Reader that also has the ability to bend metal and being his little apprentice. Like they go from mentoring to lovers?
Power
[Karl Heisenberg x Fem!Reader]
Warnings: 18+, MINORS DNI! Good ol' pussy eatin', Karl being a bit of a dick, just normal re8 stuff.
A/N: This was so fun to write, i do hope you like it! Thanks so much for this request! This is more... uh reader loathing karl and then letting him mentor her, and then they become lovers. i hope that is okay dfijffnwfjw
“Fuck!” You screamed out, stomping your foot. “Why can’t I just live with Lady Dimitrescu?”
You were growing angry. Rage boiled inside of you. You let out a loud, shrill scream and slammed your foot against the metal you were supposed to be moving around with your fucking mind.
“Shit!”
Another yell. You grabbed your foot and fell to the ground, rolling in the dirt for a minute.
“Get the fuck up.”
You stopped your rolling and your eyes shot towards Heisenberg. You stood up and glared at him. You crossed your arms and stepped closer to him.
“Girl,” Heisenberg growled, “You do not wanna do that.”
When you were first sent to live with Heisenberg, you were sure it was going to be hell, he was terrifying. But now, it was hell because he was being bossy.
“You’re lucky I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. Otherwise... You’d be-”
“What? What would I be?
Your arms fell to your sides, your fingers digging into your palms. You screamed again and turned to stomp away from Heisenberg. His jacket rustled and you ignored it, thinking he was probably going to fuck around with his powers just to show off.
Show off, he did.
A piece of metal came flying towards your legs and wrapped around your shins, knocking you to the ground. A scared noise fell from your lips and you scratched at the ground, trying your best to stop whatever was happening. Once it registered that you were not about to get away, you let yourself slide towards Heisenberg.
The metal around your legs began to pull you upwards and you tensed. You truly had not expected to start fucking floating. The metal tightened as your moved higher into the air, thankfully Heisenberg seemed to not want to drop you.
“Oh, if only there were a way you could escape this.”
You swung your arm out and let out a strangled, stressed scream as he caught it. “Karl, let me down right now!”
Blood was starting to rush to your head. Heisenberg was deadpan, watching you struggle. He didn’t look comfortable, but he also was letting it happen. As you were leaning up, pulling at the metal, Heisenberg reached up to you, the metal falling and you dropping into his arms.
He quickly set you down and began to walk back to his factory. “C’mon, we’ll try again tomorrow.”
You looked down at the metal and tried your best, really giving it your all, and moved your hand outward, towards it, but nothing happened.
“Karl,” you let out a soft whine, “I can’t do this.”
Karl came up from behind and sighed. You knew for sure he was about to pull some more bullshit, so you tensed. Karl’s face dropped, his eyes softening, but you couldn’t quite see that. You could, however, hear Karl sigh.
“We’re gonna try something different.” Karl stepped behind you and your body only tensed even more.
Karl placed his gloved hand on your bicep and slid it down your arm, causing your breath to catch in your throat. “Focus on the metal,” he brought your hand upwards and uncurled your fingers, which were digging into your palm. “Just think about moving it, it’ll come naturally.”
You nodded and relaxed into him, “Okay.”
Suddenly the metal moved. You gasped and practically ripped away from Karl, your excitement bubbling over. You turned and looked at him with wide eyes.
“I did it!”
“Told ya it wasn’t hard.”
You huffed at him, “You literally dragged me around the dirt yesterday, sir! Do not go talking about this bein’ easy!”
Karl snorted, “Whatever, girl,” his eyes rolled behind his sunglasses. “Now, we can get to the actual training.”
You stood across from Karl, in the scrapyard, your fingers twitching at your sides. You were finally getting good at whatever the hell Miranda had “blessed” you with, and Karl was taking training up a notch.
The metal began to float around you causing you to feel a little anxiety. You brought your arms up, palms facing Karl, and you pushed some of the metal back towards him. As you did that, he snapped his fingers, effortlessly causing a piece of metal to fly at you. A short whine escaped you as it scraped your cheek.
Warmth ran down your cheek. Blood.
“Not fair!”
“Life isn’t fair, Kitten,” Karl smirked.
You blinked, and your hands fell down to your sides. Your entire body tensed and without even thinking, you caused the metal to shift around you. Every single piece, even the ones near Karl, hit the ground. Hard.
“That’a girl!”
Karl walked towards you and smiled proudly. Your stomach twisted and you swallowed hard. Something about that pet name, and the way he said it... He had your stomach in knots. You gave him a nervous smile and nodded.
“Thanks. I totally meant to do that.”
Karl laughed, “Let’s go inside, I think that’s enough for today. Anyway,” Karl brought his gloved hand to your cheek, “You’re bleeding. You need to clean that up.”
Without thinking, you swatted him away and leaned back from him. Karl, unbeknownst to you, was not a fan of that reaction. His face dropped, slightly, before he gave you a cocky grin once more.
The both of you walked in, and you knew you were going to have to deal with your new feelings, one way or another.
It had been about a week since ‘the incident’ and you could not get the way he called you ‘kitten’ out of your head. He hadn’t said it since, he had barely gotten close to you unless he was training with you, and even then he kept his distance.
You had to find a way to relieve stress and you had to find one soon. Being a desperate woman, you decided, when there was a family meeting, you were going to find one of Alcina’s daughters and ask her for help.
And you did just that.
“Daniela,” You pulled her to the side and prayed that Karl wouldn’t find you, “I need help.”
“Ooooh~” She let out a laugh, or what you could only assume was a laugh, “what does the newest member of the family need?”
“Please keep quiet, this is important to keep between us, and only us.”
“Of course,” she grabbed your shoulder and smiled at you.
‘Maybe she’s trying to make me feel less scared?’ You thought. “Anyway...” You tried to shrug her hand away, “Look, do you ladies have any... toys. Just, like, around the castle?”
“Toys?” Daniela cocked her head, “I didn’t think you wanted to play with men?”
Your eyes widened, “No! Sex toys!” You hissed at her.
Her eyes lit up, “Oh! Of course. Follow me, my cute little pet.”
And just like that, you were completely set up to relieve your stress.
Finding a secluded area was not the easiest. So many of Karl’s little experiments wandered around. But once you found it, you were ecstatic.
You were sprawled out on a small pallet you had made. You had surrounded yourself with some metal, a barrier between you and the creatures that could find you. Keeping it up was becoming a hassle, especially once you started feeling immense pleasure.
You had been messing around with yourself for a good half of the day. You had somehow convinced Karl to let you wander off and not work that day. He said he had things he needed to tend to, and let you go off on your own.
You were taking breaks in between sessions, but nothing was like the real thing. The vibrations of the toy were sending shockwaves through your body. You were getting close to the edge, toes curling, eyes rolling back, and body tensing. And, unlike all your other orgasms, you let out a loud whimper.
“Hey, girl-” Karl called out, obviously looking for you.
“Karl-” You moaned out, not registering Karl’s voice.
Something had come over you, you were completely wrecked by the thought of Karl having his way with you. To the point where you called out for him. And he most definitely heard you.
The metal dropped around you and you, suddenly, you were forced to face Karl. Once and for all. A scream ripped from your throat and you closed your legs, pulling your large, button up shirt, over your knees.
“Fuck!” You yelled, “I’m so sorry, I didn’t-”
“Damn,” Karl, being the extreme gentleman he was, noticed you weren’t entirely comfortable and covered his eyes. “If you needed some help you could have asked.”
“Karl!” You shouted throwing the sex toy to the side. Face burning, body trembling, mind filled with pure embarrassment, you just sat on the floor, “Shut up!”
Suddenly, you realized what he said. Your jaw dropped and your arms, that were wrapped around your legs, tensed.
“Last chance,” Karl smirked, eyes still hidden, “you obviously need-”
“Okay.”
That was all he needed to hear. His hand dropped from his face and he stalked towards you. Without a word, Karl leaned down, picked you, and tossed you over his shoulder. Letting out a small gasp, you hung down his back. One of his hands held you steady while the other rested on your ass.
The both of you reached his ‘room’, just an area with a mattress on the ground not as many experiments around. Karl placed you down on the mattress and leaned over you, he peeked over his sunglasses at you.
“You have no clue how long I’ve wanted this.”
Heisenberg’s mouth was the shell of your ear, his breath causing your body to react in the best way possible. He pulled back and stared you down, like a predator ready to devour their prey. Your knees knocked together and you were looking up at Heisenberg with big doe eyes. His large calloused hand grabbed one of your knees and he pulled your legs apart, gently.
“I was wondering where that shirt went...”
“Well, maybe if you had more shirts you wouldn’t have noticed.”
Karl chuckled, a rumble coming from his chest, and you felt like you had made some type of mistake, “Are you sure you wanna get that tone with me, kitten?”
“Yes...” It sounded more like a question than an answer, but the confidence was almost there.
“How are you so bratty, yet so cute?” Karl positioned himself between your legs.
You shrugged, unable to find words to say. Your brain was malfunctioning at the worst time. You had thought about this moment, even dreamed of it, and now there you sat, looking like some deer in headlights. You were vulnerable and so small compared to him.
“You sure you’re up for this, kitten? You’re looking a little-”
“I’m good!” Your voice cracked, “You have no clue how much I’ve wanted this- you. I just kinda thought you... hated me.”
Karl cocked his head at you, “How? You’re fucking amazing. I thought you hated me, the way you tensed when we were training... I just assumed you were afraid.”
“Karl,” you spoke so calmly, as if you weren’t almost naked and completely vulnerable under him, “as I said before, you dragged me through the dirt with metal...”
“That was just tough love,” Karl smirked down at you, before his facial features softened, “I can make it up to you?”
You nodded, wondering what he had in mind.
“Lean back,” he moved down, positioning himself between your legs, his body keeping your legs from closing.
You complied of course, and leaned back for him. Your back hit the mattress and you let out a shaky sigh. Karl began to softly kiss up your thigh, his large hands pulling your legs further apart. Your hands gripped at the bare mattress below you and you arched into Karl’s mouth.
Once he reached your cunt, you let out a soft moan, waiting for more. One of Karl’s hands gripped at your hip, while the other pulled your shirt up further. His hand quickly moved from your shirt and to your bare ass.
“I promise, I’ll be gentle,” Karl murmured right before his tongue licked a stripe up your pussy.
You gasped. God, it was everything you had imagined, and better. His tongue quickly found your clit and he sucked at it, briefly, before getting back to your pussy.
You let out a soft hum of pleasure, your hands knocking his hat off and grabbing at his hair. You pulled at it and Karl immediately stopped.
“Girl,” his chest rumbled, and his eyes snapped up at you, “I don’t think you’re prepared for what that brings.”
You couldn’t answer, you were genuinely too in the moment to register anything but your own pleasure. And you were getting close to cumming. Your back arched, and your toes curled, once his lips met your throbbing pussy again.
“Karl,” your voice was loud, but not loud enough.
“Kitten, who’s making you feel this good?”
“You- You are!”
Your feet jerked, pulling you up on your tiptoes, and your back curved, causing your hips to push into Karl, letting his tongue go deeper.
“Karl! I’m- I’m gonna-” You were cut off, everything becoming too much.
You gasped loudly and the entire factory shifted and groaned. Your eyes screwed shut and your entire body tensed under him. Karl did not slow. You felt the metal around you beginning to move.
Your eyes snapped open, just in time for you to witness the metal starting to come to life around the two of you. You fell, your back colliding with the mattress once more, and the metal fell back down. The factory stopped creaking, the only noise now being your loud panting.
“Damn, girlie,” Karl brought his face up to yours, “you’re more powerful than I thought...”
Karl gave you a kiss, and you quickly deepened it. Your arms wrapped around his neck and held himself above you. Your legs wrapped around his waist and you softly mewled beneath him. Reluctantly, Karl pulled away and pressed his forehead to yours.
“How about-” he paused, thinking about his wording, “how about we take this shit over? Fuck everyone else. Me and you, kitten, that’s all that matters.”
You quickly answered, unsure if it was the fact he just ate your pussy, the love you felt for him, or your genuine hate for Mother Miranda. Or all of the above, “How about we fuck first? The vibrator just wasn’t doing it. We can think about world domination after sex.”
“I like the sound of that.”
#karl heisenberg#karl heisenberg x reader#karl heisenberg x you#karl heisenberg imagine#beff writes#anzu-sl#i love karl so much#like.#karl top me challenge#i hope this was good!!!#aaaaa#im always nervous to post a fic lol
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