#willing suicide

[rideordiewithme]

You're here...? (Part two!)

This is part two to my very first post! "You're here...?"

please read the first part before reading this part (the story won't make sense for storyline reasons) and please check the TW's!!!!! On the first part or the tags at the bottom of this post!!

"Wait..." Robin backs up, wiping his teary eyes and looking up at Vance with a small smile, almost mischievous the way he looks into Vance's eyes like he has a plan.

"You're dead, right?" There's an idea in Robin's head, and it makes him smile and turn around to his nightstand, starting to dig through it.

"Yeah..." Vance said with a nod, not really sure why that was a question. "...I'm dead."

He'd shift up from where he sat, watching his friend dig through his nightstand. "What exactly are you doing, Ro?"

"Well..." Robin starts, shaking his head and opening another drawer. "Since you're dead... if I... was… if I was dead. Then... technically... we could be together again."

He keeps looking through his drawers, trying to find something, his movements almost desperate.

Vance stiffens at the mention, the possibility that they could become something after he died if Robin followed through. "-Robin... Don't do something stupid." He said, trying to hide the urgency in his voice.

"I'm here now, there's no need for you to... to throw your living life away for me."

He could be a ghost, but Robin was real. Real and alive, his living life still in front of him, and Vance was scared of messing that up for him.

"Vance. A life without you is not a life worth living." Robin says, his voice rough, he's holding back tears. He keeps searching desperately in his drawers before making his way to his closet and pulling at the floorboards, eventually finding one that popped out with ease.

"...Robin-" Vance started, but he fell short of saying anything else.

He couldn't stop his friend from giving up his future life and becoming something like him.

It's something he'd dreamed of back then, being able to see Robin again...but not by making him give up everything. Vance only nodded his head, moving closer to Robin with as much caution as he could before kissing him on the forehead. "Fine...I still love you, regardless."

Robin stops searching, wrapping his arms around Vance's neck and pulling him down onto the ground next to him.

"You wanna spend my final moments with me?" His voice was a little shaky. He was scared, but he wanted to do this.

Needed to do this.

Vance was worried, but he could see how his friend desperately wanted to be with him after death, and he wasn’t about to break his heart.

“Always.” Vance whispered, leaning closer to the boy as he ran a through the boy’s hair.

“...I’ve always loved you." Robin takes a deep breath.

"I've always loved you too, Vance." He smiles, enjoying Vance's fingers in his hair before he turns back to the closet, bending down to grab a knife and two bottles of pain Killers.

"You ready, Vance?”

“As ready as I'll ever be.” Vance sighed quietly, pulling Robin in for a very gently kiss, their first kiss, before they move onto what happens in the afterlife. They know it's not going to be easy, but at least they have each other.

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: sacrifice / self sacrifice / slight suicidal themes / death mention / ]

I personally think that Leo took the wrong lessons from the movie. I definitely think he grew to understand the importance of teamwork and making sure he takes others into account so as to not harm them by proxy of whatever scheme he has cooked up, however based on the ending events I’m not quite certain he fully grasped two things.

The first thing is communication. Oh, he can communicate, and he does, when he deems it necessary. When he’s setting up a plan prior to the action. But this is where the second thing comes in.

The second thing I don’t think Leo truly grasped is “it’s not about you.” It’s so unbearably easy to take that the wrong way, especially when taking the rest of the series into account.

What I believe Leo took from this message is not “it’s not just you, everyone matters and can contribute, can help and be helped” but “put the whole of everyone above yourself” which can both be a good lesson…and a fatal one.

And it is fatal, we see as much in the movie.

Even after the big hope speech, when Leo is “fighting” Krang!Raph, he takes a huge risk. Sure, it worked, and Leo managed to get through to Raph through a well deserved apology, but it could have so easily ended in his death and yet he barely even hesitates to go for it.

And then again, to the big scene at the end, where Leo sacrifices himself not only for the sake of his family, but for the whole world.

To him, that’s the message to take from this. That the lives of everyone, of the greater good, matters…more than him. That the risk to himself is worth it if others can be saved.

Leo learned that gambling with his life as the betting chip is always the best move to make in the end.

And to make matters worse…this thinking is what works.

These risks are ultimately what is needed to save the day, so why would Leo look away from it now? Clearly it’s the right move and everything worked out!

Thing is, Leo did grow from the events of the movie. He learned to take things more seriously and be more mature, he learned to value his team’s input and capabilities enough to rely on them more, and he learned to be less self-centered and realize the turmoil others were going through (especially if that turmoil is a result of his actions.)

But still, he’s grown to accept the gamble of his life as a viable answer to their problems.

Personally, with how Leo has been shown to toy around with the idea of “it’s better me than them” I think this goes beyond sacrifice in the name of love or even sacrifice in the name of responsibility, and pushes over into sacrifice in the name of worth.

[daisybell-on-a-carousel]

Something about deeply suicidal character Jason Todd who usually tries going out fighting or in the self sacrificing hero way + Jason's magic swords tied to his soul where he has to cut himself with them to power them up

[radlymona]

TRAs having no empathy yet again

Teenagers who are pushed towards transitioning aren’t “pushovers” they’re mentally and emotionally vulnerable young people who shouldn’t be allowed to make life-changing medical decisions. Acknowledging this fact isn’t stopping adults from transitioning. It just aims to stops other vulnerable teenagers from doing the same.

[theatre-apocalypse]

[bet-on-me-13]

Jazz joins the Suicide Squad to save Danny

So! Danny got caught by the GIW. And it was Public too.

Jazz can see absolutely no way to save Danny. The GIW Base is heavily fortified, she has no help aside from Tucker and Sam, and public opinion is against Ghosts, so nobody would want to help her protest his Capture. Maybe a few teenagers from the high school, but absolutely none of the adults would help.

So she does the one thing she can. She contacts Amanda Waller.

Waller had previously approached her Parents about buying some of their tech off them, for her "Specializes Task Force" to use in case they ever came up against a Ghost.

From the short interaction Jazz had with Waller, she knew one thing.

That Woman would do ANYTHING, to protect the Government she worked for.

All Jazz needed to do, was offer her something that outweighed the value of capturing Danny. Information. The Infinite Realms, the True Biology of Ghosts, the Psychology of Ghosts, the Power Structure of the Realms, and so much more. Waller needed to know everything she could about the Realms to feel secure, to feel like her Country was safe. She needed Information.

And Jazz had that in spades.

As the daughter of the Leaders on Ectology, and a friend to multiple Saptient Ghosts, including the Kings and Queens of various Realms, she was uniquely qualified to provide all this information.

And Waller was impressed. But she still felt like she needed a little more, and seeing as Jazz was a highly trained Martial Artist due to her Mom, and had been taught enough about mechanical engineering by her Dad to constitute a Major in in, she saw potential.

She saw a Pawn. Perfect for placement on Task Force X. Her Suicide Squad had been missing an extra member recently, and Jazz was the perfect fit.

So they made a Deal.

Danny Fenton, also known as The Phantom, would he released from Government Detainment, alongside any other Sentient/Sapient Ghost in their possession. They would he protected from further Detainment until further Notice, and the Town of Amity Park would be left alone by the GIW Indefinitely.

In return, Jazzmine Fenton would be hired on as Amanda Wallers On-Call Consultant for anything related to Ghosts and the Realms. Additionally, she would be employed as a Part Time Member of Task Force X, answering the call of Duty whenever is is directed as her, No Questions Asked. (Or the deal would be null and void)

But she would Endure it. Because she and Waller had one thing in common.

She would do Anything, to protect her little brother.

[keyfolk]

maddie's monolgue in i saw the tv glow was incredible, but it's interesting how so many viewers took her statement about burying herself literally. i think, generally, there are two veins of interpretation of this movie, reflecting which reality the viewer favors. you could believe that the tv show is the true "reality" of the movie, or that it's simply a surrealist backdrop to the story of one person's intense repression. in the latter interpretation, maddie's dialogue feels dangerous -- is she actually advocating suicide? or simply speaking in metaphor for the trans experience of coming out?

i felt that this scene tread the line between those two extremes. but more notably, i thought about acts of "suicide" a closeted or repressed lesbian would feel drawn to. the way that maddie describes the burnout guy she paid to bury him, how he didn't even know what he was doing -- to me, it felt like she was implying an act of sexual self-harm, testing her sexuality, "burying herself" in the emotional pain. the catharsis found in suffocating herself, allowing herself to dissociate and fade away, and then coming free with the understanding of who she really is... while i think her monologue can be taken in many ways, this interpretation resonates with me.

[qprpbj]

cw about ponyboy and his suicidal thoughts/ideation under the cut re: deaths at my door/throwing in the towel staging and my lil opinions!!!!

tonight i am thinking about how the staging & connotations of deaths at my door vaguely implies pony contemplating suicide/having suicidal thoughts (or. idk that’s how i read it anyway) particularly provoked by the lines like “i swear that [death] it’s following me / death’s shadow is long and it grows all around me ” “you should move on / you’d be better off without me” etc and how he fiddles and stares down with his open switchblade the entire song, held tight in his hand till the end when johnny convinces him to close the blade and finally hand it over, finalized by johnny holding pony’s hand/shoulder and grounding him

this is Particularly insane to me because not five minutes later, the next time we see pony, it’s him still upstage singing the final verse to throwing in the towel with darry and soda, the highest harmony, which reads like “this is the darkest hour of the darkest night / looking overhead, you don’t see no light / […] there ain’t no letting go” and “that’s what love is all about […] / there ain’t no throwing in the towel”.

pony’s night of contemplating suicide in deaths at my door is his literal self-proclaimed “darkest hour of the darkest night” but it’s his brothers and family — johnny who talks him down, and soda & darry’s spirit he can still feel within him — that save him and convince him not to “throw in the towel”. which, of course, is directly paralleling soda talking darry down from doing the same damn thing (i could talk for Ages about how parallel of characters pony and darry are, but that’s. an entirely different Thing).

idk i just think it’s SO interesting that they have pony sing this verse with both of them right after DAMD bc that literally quite WAS his “darkest hour of the darkest night”, in fact it very well could’ve been his final hour of his final night, but he was talked down and convinced by family and love and brotherhood that he fuckin needs to be here still. that he’s got people who love him, people who need him, and he can’t give up on them and leave them alone because they never gave up on him, not even when things got unimaginably hard or when they felt like “giving out” with their “heads full of doubt” etc. yk. idk sorry this is probably sooo incoherent but. idk i just have so many thoughts about ponyboy ughhh

[lyss-butterscotch]

AHHHS HIT FUCK BITCH IN THE MIDST OF MY INSANITY I REMEMBERED UI PEBBLES SHINE A LIGHT REPRISE.G OD DAMMIT I JUST KEEP SINKING FURTHER AND FURTHER

[TW: Mentions of suicide]

You made a mistake reminding me.

[rideordiewithme]

You're here..? Robin Arellano x Vance Hopper (Dead/Ghost! Vance x Suicidal! Robin)

Summary: Vance died three years ago. Robin and he were best friends before Vance was kidnapped and killed by the grabber. They spent every waking second with each other, from the time they both got up, meeting up to walk to school together and then walking back, spending their evenings together splayed across the roof of Vance's house.

Tw: description of gore, death, suggested suicide, boy x boy

This is part One! Part two is titled: You're here..? (Part two!)

Robin had believed that the rumors of a ghost residing in his house were merely fabrications, stories designed to frighten young children.

"It's not even real, Vance isn't haunting my house, okay?" He told his friend over the phone, as he lay on his bed. "Yeah, I live in that house he was buried in, but it doesn't mean anything!"

That was five hours ago, and now he's alone in the middle of the night, staring at a fucking ghost, Vance Hopper.

Robin sits on his bed, staring at the ghost of Vance- Fucking -Hopper. How in the actual Fuck!? He's a ghost. How can he see Vance!? Why was he here!?

He just sits on his bed, not moving to get up or lay back down. He just sits with his back against the headboard, staring.

"...Robin?" Vance called out, with a slight waver in his voice as he took a step into the room.

He was a mess, from the dried blood all over his clothing to the gash across the back of his head, he looked like he'd just survived a murder scene. Except... he didn't.

"Hey, Robin...?"

"Vance..." Robin answers, voice shaky as he looks at Vance's ghost. "You fucking douchebag. You said you'd make it out. "His breath is shaky, trying to sound angry, and he pats the spot next to him on his bed, practically begging for Vance to join him.

"I tried!" Vance replied with a yell, making a face as if he was hurt by the fact that Robin's still mad at him.

The ghost takes another look up and down at the state of the bedroom...his room and makes a face as he takes a seat next to his friend. "Christ...what a mess."

"Look, I'm sorry..." Robin starts, voice still shaky as he reaches out for Vance, a pleading look in his eyes for Vance to come to him and not keep them apart. "You just... it got worse after you left and... and I miss you so much..." He whispers, loud enough for Vance to hear as he tucks his thin legs under the rest of his thin body.

He continues holding his arms out for Vance to come closer.

Vance hesitates for a moment, trying to fight back the feeling of comfort he craves, to not give into Robin.

"…Ro... I-" He began, until he finally caved and moved closer to Robin. "...I miss you too, you idiot."

It'd been three years since he'd seen the boy, and yet it felt the same as the last time they'd met, the same warmth he felt from his hugs he could feel right now.

Robin hugs Vance tightly. Even if he can't feel any warmth coming from Vance's ghost, he tightens his arms around him and buries his face in Vance's cold chest.

He shakes a little while mumbling into Vance's chest, "I f-fucking miss you..." it's meant to be a little harsh, like he'd had a horrible time without Vance and wanted to hurt him by saying it, but it comes out soft and shaky, almost like a plead.

Despite his ghost-like form, Robin would feel Vance shift and adjust to face the boy a little better before pulling him tighter into the hug and wrapping his arms around Robin.

"I know..." Vance said, voice shaky. "I wish we'd been able to meet again."

Robin could feel Vance's hand stroke his hair, a comfort he was familiar with. Vance would always do it when they were together. It makes him take a deep breath and calm slightly.

[dykedvonte]

See like the only reason I think the others seriously believed Curly may have crashed the ship is cause he basically had a 30 Rock "I lie to myself" momentary breakdown in front of them after one too many mocktails and like completely forgot about it.

[luneinary]

thinking about shuichi ryoma parallels ...

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

and a spare jaiden thought. because what the fuck was all that death. all that constant death. her minimap drenched in red from the endless death. she has been so self sacrificial at LEAST since bobby died, and now this?

jaiden has more family now. she has red team. she felt like cucurucho was the only one there for her, her only friend. traumabonded to an evil bear, now traumabonded to an evil cult. they have died with her. she will die for them. over and over and over and over and over again. needless in the pure quantity of death. her life is nothing to her. and why the fuck should it? the colour of the map doesn’t bother her- her world is already red

[moongothic]

So I'm confused about something. There was a cover story about Ms Goldenweek and other Baroque works agents breaking Crocodile out of prison but he just. Told them no? And stayed there with Mr 1 and Mr 2? I don't get why he wanted to go to Impel Down just to break out when he had the chance

I can't tell you 100% why Crocodile chose to stay in prison and go to Impel Down, but my best guess really is that he was just...

Taking the L with grace

More specifically. Crocodile had lost everything. I think deep inside he might've been literally too depressed to want to go free again.

Like he does literally say that. He gave up.

He had been building his reputation as "the Hero of Alabasta" for at least 10 years at this point. He had built not just a criminal organization that he had been running for four years, but also he had been running legal business stuff (like his casino) for probably longer than that. A decade's worth of work and effort to take over a country, and most importantly, get away with it. The reason he had orchestrated that whole rebellion was so that the rebels and the royal family could "take each other out", leaving the country wide open for a World Government Official such as himself to take up. The reason Baroque Works was doing this all in secret was so that the WG never found out, otherwise they wouldn't have let him have Alabasta.

But indeed, his plans were foiled by a kid in flipflops in less than 24 hours, just at the final moment before Crocodile would win. He lost everything. And the World Government found out about what he had been planning.

So even if he escaped from that prison with his former agents, what was he going to do?

He wouldn't be able to take over Alabasta anymore because he did not have manpower (as he had lost all his goons), and having lost his financial empire he wouldn't be able to build a new army any time soon. And even if he did, now that they knew what he had done the people of Alabasta would not accept him as their new king, even if he personally assasinated Cobra and the entire family. Not to mention, the WG finding out about his plans meant that they had every fucking reason to try and stop Crocodile if he did as much as set foot on that island again. By which I mean, they could launch a Buster Call on his ass. Send all the fucking Admirals after him. And so, even if Crocodile still believed Pluton was somewhere in Alabasta and that he just had to comb through the entire desert to find it... Between the Alabastan people and the WG in the way, finding Pluton would not be easy. Especially when Robin wouldn't even be there to just point him directly to it. It could take years, if not decades, while fighting off the WG by himself. And that's while assuming Pluton was somewhere in Alabasta. Like WE the readers now know Pluton is in Wano, but since Robin didn't tell him that. All Robin said was that the Poneglyph "didn't mention the weapon", and Cobra's reaction to the name merely proved the weapon's existence in Crocodile's mind. But surely, because Crocodile is a smart young man, he'd understand there was a risk that Pluton could exist, but just not be in Alabasta, right? Like that would be a possibility too, right?

I think this is why Crocodile has given up on Alabasta. He had one opportunity at seizing the country, and he failed. And without Robin, he could spend the rest of his life combing through a haystack for a needle when there's no needle, and he'd have no idea. I think is why he explicitly says in Impel Down he no longer has "interest in that country". He won't be able to pull off another stunt like this, ever.

And that leads us back to "why not escape earlier and avoid going to Impel Down to begin with". Thanks to his status as a Shichibukai, Crocodile hasn't been on the run from the WG for like two decades. And the past 10 or so years he has seemingly lived a life of luxury in his funny little casino. But now, having lost everything, he'd be back on the run. And because he's a world famous former "hero of the people", there would be nowhere he'd be able to go where people would not recognize him and send the marines after him. So he'd be on the run, for the rest of his life or until he'd get capture again. And mind you, the guy does not trust anyone, so he'd be on the run alone. Without any purpose or goal.

And you might be thinking, "Daz and the rest of BW was still there!", yeah, arguably true. But at this point Crocodile had no reason to trust any of them. Like personally, I think the reason Crocodile ended up taking a liking to Daz was BECAUSE he chose to follow him to Impel Down when he really did not have to. Like Daz showed an unusual level of loyalty to Crocodile, and I think Crocodile recognized that. That's why Daz is still with Croc, post-timeskip. But Miss Goldenweek and co? Crocodile had no reason to believe they wouldn't betray him if given a chance and a reason. And if the WG would come chasing his ass, they'd have plenty of reason to try and betray Croc (handing Crocodile over to spare their own lives). Not to mention, when they come release their former boss from jail, what did Miss Goldenweek say?

"Let's do Baroque Works again"

As I've already explained in detail, I think we might know why Crocodile wasn't interested in being Baroque Works' "boss" again.

So. Yeah. If in Crocodile's mind he'd be on the run from the Government for the first time in two decades all alone, in a situation where rebuilding what he had before would be bloody hard if not downright impossible, and he wouldn't be able to obtain what he had spent the last decade working for regardless...

Taking the L and just going to prison might've been the easier option

[roxannepolice]

Fifteen: *clearly let go off much of the Doctor's self-and-other-destructive prometheanism, accepts the reality of their adoption with maturity, is again fascinated by the universe in its ugliness no less than beauty*

Fandom: OMG, purest happy baby 🥰🥰 he healed so well, bye bye all traumas, rehab with Temple-Nobles went excellent!

Fifteen: *exhibits signs of ability to self-reflect*

Fandom: AAAAA HE'S SUICIDALLY DEPRESSED!!!!!!

[happyk44]

Just. Thinking about Percy who wants to die and would willingly kill himself if he ever got to that point versus Jason who wants to kill himself but can't because suicide is dishonourable so instead he'll just go through dozens battle after battle and hope he gets an injury that will cure all his problems versus Hazel and Nico who don't want to die because there is so much to live for but would be content to sacrifice their lives if they had no other choice because they do not fear death

Like I'm just. Rotating that in my head on repeat right now and feeling THINGS about it. I mean Percy is always on the lookout, waiting and fearing for the overflow that'll make him turn Riptide on himself, because it's not an "if, it's a "when", he knows it in his gut it's just a matter of time, and Jason is always prickling with an unending internal distress he doesn't understand because what even are emotions and campers cheer him on as he seeks out worser and worser monsters, no one ever knowing he's holding back screams when the battle ends and he's still alive, no life-threatening incurable injuries to land him in the underworld forever and then there's Hazel and Nico, who both have suffered so much, dealt with so much heartache and pain, as though the Fates themselves had been told that children of Hades, children of Pluto, are not supposed to live and be happy, but nonetheless they carry on, air in their lungs, heart pumping, knowing that the world has so much to offer and there is always something to do, even if that's extending your help, your life, to others.