#which really sucks having to wait
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#🐍//: ooc. the mun.#story timr !#i went in to the hospital a week back to see if i have sleep acnea and it already took like three monthd for this appt#but now i am going in to sleep at the hospital and find out if i have it in October.#👁️👄👁️💅#such a long time#which really sucks having to wait#while having trouble breathing in my sleep#( yikes )
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Regular reminder that sudden and severe weight loss is a pretty serious sign that something is very, very wrong
#weight#weight loss#brought to you by the realisation today that my hips are currently smaller than my fucking waist usually is#it’s summer and i’ve been walking the hill a lil more but damn that’s not fucking good#and before anyone even THINKS ‘i wish i had this problem’ i guarantee you do not#cuz it comes from 2 hour bathroom trips that are screamingly painful#and the arbitrary inability to eat literally anything#which often crops up right before i sit down to eat something#and i mean i can wait it out and eat late but it’s really goddamn annoying#and none of my goddamn clothes fit AGAIN i’m way out of even my smallest stuff#my broke ass is not buying new shit and if i make any cosplay to fit me now it’ll be way too small when i’m back in remission 😤#gotta get the goddamn meal replacement shakes again and see if i can process those#they are GROSS#gym bros are lying to you#they all suck#and i need to do em along with regular meals cuz i’m not gonna get enough from either#luckily i also have chronically low blood pressure so frenchfries are medicinal on both levels#this may also explain my resting heartrate being around 120bpm in my opinion#but no one’s ever really discussed it
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I know a sorta made a small post along these lines the other day, but something a lil more official of!!
im kinda broke rn, between the recent stuff with losing my car and having to get a new one and work literally scheduling me 13 hrs a week. Im slowly losing money and it got really bad this month after paying my bills and everything and realizing I had just 300 bucks in my bank account.
My current job hasn't been working with me to give me the hours i need to make a living wage and iv been trying to get a new job for months with no success and it's looking like i could really use a lil extra support via online commission work rn until I can land a more solid paying job. I really hate to sound like a desperate wet cardboard box beast but I still need to insure my new car and cant afford it as i stand right now.
I wont ask for donations, I think im going to be fine, but a lil money to help keep my head above the water would be great so im just gonna promo my commission work. To anyone who can commission me in some way or another would be awesome! I appreciate any support I can get rn even just a reblog
My Commission Info
My Kofi
My Etsy
My Toyhouse
#again sorry for sounding like im crying wolf with 200 in my account but i havent bought groceries this month#or my car insurance#im waiting for my next paycheck#so i kinda know its about to get sucked down the drain#i still havent bought christmas gifts for my brother and the cousins which i would really like to be able to if i could#again im not gonna die#so im not asking for donations#i will be fine#im just a lil money stressed and if i could branch out to try and get some commission work rn that would be a huge help#again im not asking for donations#there defiantly ppl who need it more than me#but if you were everythinkin to commission me and have the funds rn#i wouldnt mind if you reached out#i know its the holidays and everyone is probably low on funds#i see the situation as it is rn#but if i could just make an extra hundred or two i think it put my mind at ease a lil more for when its time to pay all my bills again
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#kirby#daily kirby#my art#digital#hal laboratory#nintendo#it was a hard day today.#sometimes you just gotta cry for an hour about requiring significant assistance to do basic stuff that you don't actually have help with rn!#(my wife is working 6 12s at a job we had to move across the country for)#(which means 1 she is *exhausted* at *all* times and struggling to even meet her own needs)#(and 2 our other partner and all our family and friends are. multiple days away by car. so they can't come help.)#it's getting hard to even stick leftovers in the microwave for myself but no one else is able to cook for me.#it sucks.#(we're moving again in june because this was a 1-year position from the beginning)#(and the idea is for our other partner to move in with us which will help a lot)#(plus my wife should be switching to a reliably 5-day week at that time)#(but we don't know where we're going for another month and a half.)#(so we can't really do any groundwork or anything to make that happen.)#(and having zero agency other than sitting and waiting and getting worse alone Really Sucks!)#I guess this is a bit of a secret part two to yesterday's meducation lol#favorites
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me when my disability disables me:
#heds#ehlers danlos syndrome#hypermobile eds#hypermobile ehlers danlos#today i'm feeling kvetchy about not being able to run (or even walk fast sometimes) because inflating my lungs takes so much effort#and the pulmonologist said i have vocal cord dysfunction which doesn't fit my symptoms and then didn't fix the insurance thing that#he said he'd fix#so i'm kinda just stuck until i can get another pulmonologist which is hard cuz there aren't a lot in my area and wait times are eons#and even then most don't know jack about hEDS bc why would they it's a rare disease but then they aren't helpful bc they don't know jack#about the rare disease that is probably the root cause of my symptoms#and being dizzy when i stand up or tilt my head back too far and not tolerating heat the way i used to also sucks thanks POTS#at least i don't faint all the time?#and i never can tell if i'm hungry or not because acid reflux makes me feel like i'm starving when i just ate and other times like i'm full#when i haven't eaten. so i can't trust my hunger cues which is really irritating. and Tums don't help my acid#i can't just keep doing prilosec courses. i need to see a GI doc maybe they could do something but there's no time#and none of this is gonna kill me and i can still function it's just so tiring always having something hurting or gross or hungry#espec. when to other people i look like i should be able to do it all just fine so they're shocked when a flight of stairs winds me#i'm young and should-be healthy and this is unfair and i hate it and i wish my body worked right but i have it better than plenty of ppl#so really i can't complain
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finished veilguard and my final thoughts on it are that it's a pretty fun rpg but a bad dragon age game
#at times it felt like it was made by people who have never heard of dragon age in their life#as a game on it's own like the characters story combat it's a decent 7/10#but as a dragon age game it's a 3/10 and the only reason it's not a 1/10 is cause the ancient elvhen lore was actually good#and it sucks cause i really wanted to love this game#like i'm not a dao/da2 only purist i genuinely love inquisition it's my second fave dragon age game#so i was really going into veilguard genuinely hopeful it was going to be good#but after ten years of waiting this was not it lol#honestly the whole thing can be tracked back to them throwing away the worldstates#because that's the foundation of a dragon age game and it showed that they don't really care for established lore#as an example compared to inquisition which had three different possible warden contacts#with three completely different personalities and three different voicelines to record#this just seems lazy not to even try including the different worldstates over codex entries#(sorry if this is all rambly and makes no sense i just have a lot of feelings on it akdjfkf)#datv lb#bioware critical#datv critical
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oh god i was BEGGING for scenes like this with companions in DATV Something that actually felt dramatic and gave weight to their actions just to make me feel something (I was thinking about this when Lucanis got possessed by Spite in this scene)
youtube
#I don't even like DAI's writing but it had little moments that kept me going#I felt like i kept waiting for some dramatic pay off to happen in DATV w the companions storylines and it never came#the closest I got was Davrin's with Isseya :// and a little bit w Harding and the Titans which sucks bc u have to kill one of them 🙄🙄🙄#and its so wierd bc 4 months ago I was very much NOT feeling DAI but now that i've played all 4 games and that I know#the pit falls of DAI and what to fix with mods#that game feels like a nice luxurious bath after a long day#<- a statement i'd never thought id be making pffff 🚬🚬🚬🚬#cullen rutherford#datv critical#da posting#adding to the tags days after: I feel this way bc a LOT of those companion quests in DATV really boil down to “this could've been an email”#whereas in DAI they were annoying (blackwall's grey warden trinket quest) but they had a MASSIVE payoff
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opening the group chat for the first time today and there's like 200 new messages because everyone's Going Through It today it seems but one of my friends dropped 'I'm separating from [terrible boyfriend she's been living with for like eight years] for real this time, I just moved a bunch of stuff to my parents' and I'm losing my mind because y'all the subject changed almost immediately HEY HI EVERYBODY ELSE SHUT THE FUCK UP I WANNA HEAR ABOUT THAT???
#'I moved my stuff and my dog' can't leave the pup behind! 'I had to last winter and it was a big reason I wound up going back' HELLO--#was he holding your fucking dog over your head. I will kill the man?????#I DIDN'T KNOW SHE'S TRIED TO LEAVE HIM BEFORE??#I'm-- so-- okay listen. admittedly I am of course simply nosy. of course I am.#but also I have never liked david Ever. justin and I were LITERALLY talking DAYS ago about Worrying About Her being stuck with him#because she moved TO CALIFORNIA with him and he was being a piece of shit then and she had NOBODY out there#and now they're in denver and like. it's his house it's his money etc etc it's a really... logistically difficult situation#but at least she's made some friends in denver and convinced her parents to move out there so she's not COMPLETELY unsupported#like she was in CA#my point is: I'm nosey but I'm also INVESTED. I fucking hate this guy darling I've wanted you to leave him this entire goddamn time#she's talked *a little* about problems with him before but also we've been around him before and he's just generally awful#and it's. like. I'm so so so fucking glad you're moving in with your parents but also. genuinely are you OKAY--#MAN AND ALSO. EVEN IF IT WASN'T 'I HATE THIS GUY AND I'M WORRIED ABOUT WHAT THE BREAKING POINT WAS--'#THIS IS A SERIOUS LONGTERM RELATIONSHIP? IT ENDING IS A BIG DEAL REGARDLESS?? WHY DID WE CHANGE THE SUBJECT SO FAST HELLO#.... actually I've identified the source of my Wanting More Details#which is: hey babe are you in a phase of this where hearing about how much he fucking sucks shit would be upsetting or affirming.#because I wanna tell you how fucking happy I am that you're leaving him. because he's a piece of shit and you deserve better than that.#ARE YOU IN AN EMOTIONAL SPACE TO HEAR ABOUT HOW I AM SCOOPING YOU INTO MY ARMS LIKE THE CAT SAMURAI MEME.#AND THREATENING THIS MAN WITH A SWORD. BECAUSE HE'S TERRIBLE. CAN I GET A VIBE CHECK THERE. SHOULD I WAIT--
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I don't know how I completely missed the fact that Jinafire's doll is a Fang Vote.
At least this time we get to see her outfit prior to voting, and I'm actually glad we didn't get to vote which character. Not to mention the outfit already has a better design then Rochelle's. Seems Mattel actually took some of the criticism to heart.
But also... Considering how Rochelle's went, I do wish she was just a regular Skullector doll. Hell, how long did it take for people to actually get her from the time her design was finalized? By the time Jinafire ships out, it won't even be the Year of the Dragon anymore lol.
#monster high#jinafire long#fang vote 2024#she better turn out banging dude#okay im watching the video and they really are doing it better this time around#instead of drawings for the voting we're getting actual prototypes#wait...do you have to be part of the fang club to vote??#the mh instagram put up a story which suggests yes...if so that sucks#i guess i dont really care about the actual vote tbh but thats a weird choice#then again they have to incentivize people to sign up for the fang club again#after barely being given anything last year im sure people weren't too keen on keeping the membership#i have no idea how my financials are gonna be once she's actually available to buy imma have to dip into my savings lol#fuck a new laptop i want a doll#text post
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had an odd dream that i was reading a comic book. sketched a couple of the pages i could remember.
#i might adapt this into an actual story because i am SO SO SO mad that it isn't a thing i can go back to reading#oc#im definitely keeping the concept of save-bot i fucking love save-bot he's just doing his best. i love a robot who wants to help people#im not equipped to be writing about underground rebellions with any sense of real tact though#besides its in a superhero universe/story so you know it would just be so sucks lol#sketch#god the colors were so interesting. the teal parts were all very precisely crosshatched and the fire was this gorgeous brush pen looking#colored inks that just seemed like they were MOVING#and i mean some of that was because i was dreaming but god even in my halfhearted copy you can see some of the movement#it was a bad scene but a really really REALLY fun dream. i love when a book can *get* to me so i was really enjoying it#put it aside so i could take a break and woke up. instant fury at the universe for not having it be a real book instead#ill reblog with details if anyone's curious. i can explain this scene but i dont feel like it#the green people are in a secret basement though. hiding from the government. blue jacket guy is a speedster robot named save-bot who does#rescue stuff with every fire department so fire suppression technology is not very good because save-bot "can just save you''#however they're badly over their legal occupancy and the secret basement has One (1) exit so everyone is like really fucked here.#includinig save-bot who is going to do his job until he dies because he is an ai without any sense of self preservation and he cares#which i didn't even CATCH until i woke up and started tryin to frantically note everything down#and then i was like wait. the glitter on that last page before i realized i needed a glass of water to keep reading... what WAS that...#(it was tears suspended in midair because save-bot goes so fast and also knows he's so fucked LOL)#seriously i'm so mad someone else didn't make this.
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Save me Joker out save me
#save me joker out#todays tumblr post was brought to you by:#1) getting to yap about joker out to my friends sister#2) going to sleep at 2 am (i was at my friends and she kept me away by playing eurovision songs)#it started with cha cha cha#and then i got them to play carpe diem#so no sleep ofc#and finally#3) having spent far too much time talking to people over the past two days#rambles#joker out#i lied#4) everybody’s waiting#that song never fucking fails to make me cry#which sucks#because i really like it#but i can’t listen to it without feeling distraught#when i get you bojan#when i get you
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Wait…you’re not saying this is…another 4 week update?
Why??
I mean okay, first off it was weird that Stormbringer was only 4 weeks despite being a Legendary, but she was a prelude to this update, and maybe they were just saving everything for the next one, since that’s the next World Exploration
But why have the World Exploration update only last 4 weeks?? These historically last at least 6-7 weeks, including the last one! 4 weeks should only be for smaller updates!
I mean sure, I don’t have to wait as long for the second half of the story which I’m thankful for, but this update’s gonna be over so quick! Yeah sure, the 3rd anniversary was a slog, but it also lasted 4 parts and only 6 of those weeks had to do with the story
Are they shortening the update lengths to hide their lack of gameplay content or something? I haven’t really looked as to what this update has, but as far as I can tell, outside of Beast Yeast, we may be looking at another dry season of in game content once we’re all done with the story. This isn’t a good solution, especially since this problem has been most prevalent in the 4 week periods
#I don’t really know if I personally find this good or bad#I don’t have to wait as long for more#but the update will be over quickly#and again I’m half convinced it’s because of a lack of content#which sucks because the story’s great#but there’s nothing else#cookie run#cookie run kingdom#new update#questions
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thinking about vampiric arakawas again just so i can make a 'blood-sucking politician' joke
#snap chats#have i ever posted my vampire arakawa musings. i think i did long ago in a distant land. or at least for halloween vjaERLVKJ#anyway i was having my evening stroll with my dog and thinking about how much i love dark-renaissance age stories and whatever#which is a weird way to lead into vampires since At Least Dracula vampire stories dont start until the victorian - progressive era#though i guess you can do whatever you want with mythical creatures and its not as if vampiric stories cant start during the 1400s either#theyre immortal and Not Real (i hope) so anythings possible theres no need to be super restrictive#i am. literally not getting to the point Point Is it could be funny .....#thats why they cna be really good assassins like just eat your targets tf <- vampires dont eat people#but then of course i have to wonder the implications ... oh ive definitely made this post but im still curious#fuuuck man i wanted to make my joke but i just realized how do i even get to that joke cause i dont think masato would be a vampire#dhampir as i definitely said way back then IF THAT. what were the circumstances wait shut up why are there police next door#bro im too nosy this post is interrupted hang on#not nosy enough to keep watching im bored its probably nothing anyawy. cause i think sawashiro and ikumi woudlve been human#like during the uhhh idk dark ages and maybe arakawa turns sawashiro into a vampire later on but what of masato .....#idk im not gonna think too hard about it. right now just take my blood-sucking politician joke idea we'll figure it out later#stopppp i was wondering about vampires in japanese pop culture but then i rmemebered mandurugo WHICH. are filipino but STILL FOUL#im everywhere im ending the post now bye#wait i have to end this post cause why tf did my bestie send me a tweet being like 'look forward to the future of chao'#since shadow x sonic generations is coming soon LIKE DONT PLAY WITH ME AVBOUT CHAO I DONT PLAY ABOUT THEM FUCKERS#ok im ending the post now for real bye im gonna throw up
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shoutout to the p4 party rebalance mod giving naoto basically every element's ultimate skill.
she deserves it-
#rambearling#persona 4#p4#totally gonna use that mod my next playthrough. i need to be able to actually use yosuke the whole game#i wanted to but my friend told me he sucks and to use kanji instead 😒 /lh /silly#which. tbf probably for the best i didn't have good elec coverage on yu for like 90% of the game-#i still don't have good wind coverage though and i'm at the final dungeon. i just have like. magaru on izanagi. and garudyne on naoto#i might still have a mothman with something idr-#will probably wait until it gets updated to have a working full izanagi moveset though i have used him the whole game this playthrough#but he uh. kinda fucking sucks-#my moveset for him is like. zionga magaru media herculean strike. and then a bunch of stat moves i don't remembear-#thinking about it there's probably guides for this kinda thing online i was just fucking around and finding out#the closest i got to actually optimizing skills was fusing black frost for the shadow mitsuo fight gggffgffgdgdg-#black frost is my hecking mvp this playthrough i bearsically just use him and izanagi honestly#i don't know what i'm doing when it comes to fusing personas tbh. when i'm in the velvet room i kinda just make whatever looks cool#and then 90% of the time i don't use it cuz i have izanagi and black frost hhggfhfvfd-#basically the only thing those two can't do is light. and almighty but that's beary situational. naoto covers both of those-#and then teddie heals and has multitarget ice skills and kanji has actually good elec skills + more phys skills 👍#i'm good at this game i swear i know it really doesn't sound like it from these tags-#i beat kusumi-no-okami my first try and my friend says that fight's hard soooooo. yea 😎
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I'm curious as to y'alls thoughts on the 2023 Hairstyle Contest winners so:
Disclaimer: This isn't an official question by Squeenix, obviously.
If you haven't seen the winning styles, check them out here. They look great!
#final fantasy 14#hairstyle contest#I personally hope they add them as pvp or clan marks rewards#regardless I really hope they don't lock them behind 7.0 content#not everyone would have reached the newest expansion by the time it drops#that's not even accounting for new players that come in#it would kind of suck if they'd have to grind through six expansions to get the new hair#doubly suck if it's the curly hair which people have waited years for#that's my two scents
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AHHHHHH
#this post brought to you by: me#i. applied for a preapproval letter for a mortgage yesterday. and spoke to a realtor to start finding me houses#i want to move several states away which further complicated things. but the houses there are CHEAP#like under 100k for a 2 bedroom move in ready#anyways i got approved for 80k with a 20k down payment. and im FREAKING THE FUCK OUT#and because i got that pre app letter i have a loan officer calling me today to talk#and we literally work at the same bank so i can SEE that hes active and hasnt read my message#even though its been 45 minutes. KEVIN MESSAGE ME BACK. IM NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO FOCUS UNTIL I DO THIS CALL#AHHHHHHH S C R E A M. it might happening!!!! i might be finally.mov8ng out in a few months!!!#i mgiht be a HOMEOWNER by the end of the year#i have been saving money for this since i was. 16? 17?#ive had a good well paying job since i was 18.#AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#once i have a house then i start job searching in that area. and start getting really serious about LEAVING my very good job#which is soooo scary. this job was supposed to be my lifelong career. but then everyone fucking moved to other states and left me behind#so theres no point staying here.#i might never have this kind of job security again.#but also my realtor said that theres a lot of bank jobs in that area so maybe itll be easy to find something#on the fence on if i tell my parents that im Making Moves right now#on one hand its hard to not talk about it becuae im STRESSED TF OUT#but on the other hand when i tentatively mentioned the state i want to move to#richard started yelling and swearing el oh el#might be better to wait and avoid the tension as long as possible?#but also i dont know how they can stay angry when its literally my best option#the other places where my friends live either have 0 opportunity and high housing prices. or are even moe liberal than where im going#idk. why do half of my problems come down to “my parents will be mad” like im a 12 year old or something. shit fucking sucks#this is why i want to get out of here#also it feels weird and bad to talk to my friends about how stressed i am about buying a house when all of them are stressed about#not being able to make rent or something. my problems feel like a brag in a really odd and shitty way. but hey!#if this works out maybe ill start being stressed about how im going to make my mortgage payments! :') yay!
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