#which isn’t a HUGE deal but what if it is yknow

[theonlythingimfuckingisstupid]

Oh nooo the anxieties :/

[gumii-bearr]

hey there sweet cheeks! your post about the hate you’ve been getting came across my dash today and girl, my heart just started hurting for you 💔 i went through a similar experience almost a year ago. i had started writing for an anime that truthfully had quite a few underage characters within it, all of which i liked on multiple levels, so i began writing fluff, angst, and smut about them.

ofc as i was an adult at the time, i always wrote with the characters in an aged-up setting because it felt extremely weird to me to be an adult inserting myself into sexual situations with canon minors. and so they were always aged up to me (i was 19 at the time, i didn’t think it was a huge deal, yknow?). for the most part, everyone was really supportive and kind — but there were a few who were relentlessly hateful and called me extremely heinous and gross things (such as a pedophile; to which i’ll never understand the logic of ‘person who writes aged-up smut about canonically-underage fictional characters = pedo/child lover’ but i digress)

i had overwhelming support, but the hate from only a handful of people was enough to discourage me quite literally completely. i even broke off from writing for my comfort anime and started to resent it, to the point i couldn’t even watch it.

it’s natural to be very hurt and discouraged when you’re called such disgusting and deplorable things when you’re quite literally not doing anything wrong; and from what i can see, your blog has become a comfort/safe space for A LOT of people (and isn’t that something we all want?) and you’re not hurting anyone at all. in fact, you’re making things better for people. you’re giving them a space where they can find comfort and escape from the hellscape that is life, and i think that’s something to be extremely fulfilled by! (it was for me).

it took quite a while (literally almost a year) for me to right myself after that incident. i still even get slight anxiety when i turn my anon on, because of how relentless the hate was. i really wish people would learn to simply block content they don’t like/agree with rather than make someone else’s experience a living hell.

anyway, i’m so sorry this was so long and please don’t feel pressured at all to respond, i just wanted to reach out and assure you that you are not being sensitive or soft in any way by being bothered by such heinous things. i hope the very best for you and that you can continue to enjoy writing and connecting with others ❤️ you deserve that pookiebear, please stay as strong as you can ❤️❤️❤️

yes exactly, people were saying some awful things and i was doing my best to just block or ignore them, but hearing a vocal minority who kinda behind anonymity makes you feel really bad about yourself. i’ve decided to just ignore and block it.

because you’re right, they should be doing the same if they don’t agree with something. they can just block or ignore content they don’t like, we do it every day i don’t know why they can’t offer the same grace to this when im not harming anyone.

i’m gonna take care of myself tho, and i have almost 1000 followers, everyone here is so beautiful and kind and unbelievably supportive so im saying for THEM, cus they absolutely deserve it 😌🫶

[official-sonic-team]

what do you think of Optimus and Hot rods relationship, yknow if he gets to hang out with hot rod before kicking the bucket

oooh thats a good question. in my mind i don’t think optimus thinks that much of hot rod. i think he LIKES hot rod and obviously he’s nice to him etc etc but i dont think optimus would have ever guessed hot rod would be his successor. they’re fundamentally opposed in opinions and personality.

like optimus CHOOSES ultra magnus to carry the matrix of leadership. he doesn’t know hot rod is the one who can open it- if he did, surely he would have just given it to hot rod, and saved them all lot of grief. but during the movie, hot rod continuously proves himself worthy of the matrix, listening and learning from the people around him, and i think that’s why optimus gives him the name rodimus when he finally unleashes the matrix- optimus recognized him as worthy.

but when they’re alive, i don’t think optimus would think twice about hot rod. he’s a great kid but not the next prime. that’s his unruly leaps before he looks fun loving low on the chain of command hot rod. that’s his friend, surely, but not who he would have picked.

as for hot rod, i think he has an amicable relationship with optimus. probably tries to get him to lighten up more and teases him a lot. also doesn’t hesitate to disobey one of his orders if he thinks it’s wrong, which can lead them to butting heads. but hot rod also has a great deal of respect for optimus, which is why taking on the mantle after him is such an enormous burden. the shadow that he lives under is HUGE. hot rod is terrified of not living up to him, not only because everyone else’s thinks he should be like optimus, but because he ALSO thinks he should be like optimus, because he also respects and admired him and feels so much dread and guilt when he believes himself guilty of getting him killed.

i think the idea of them having a mentor-mentee relationship is fun but ideally i actually don’t want that. i think it’s more interesting when they don’t have a particularly strong relationship beyond a bit of hero worship from hot rod (that skyrockets after optimus dies), that optimus doesn’t view hot rod as his successor, that they’re amicable friends but if it had been optimus’s decision he would have never chose hot rod. optimus will choose someone else to carry on his legacy but in the end it isn’t his choice- it’s the matrix’s.

[bizlybebo]

I am contacting you to discuss your car’s extended warranty (worldbuilding)

If I remember correctly you mentioned that Flick’s setting is kind of Steampunk? I’d like to hear about worldbuilding regarding that and if you want I could spew ideas that may or may not matter :D /nf

(I just wanna talk about worldbuilding, so no pressure if you don’t wanna!)

OH YEAH !! i didn’t realize how long this answer got until i was done with it omg don’t feel pressured to read it all

so like it’s heavily inspired by a discontinued fic i wrote. funnily enough. but basically it’s a pretty run of the mill “”dystopian”” setting (<i have a lot of feelings about that term and genre of fiction already but yknow). it’s pretty worldbuilding-centric and although the magic system isn’t a huge part of every day life, it’s a very important thing to many people in this world because it’s part of their daily struggle to survive.

basically,, it’s a world that’s kind of separate from our own some thousand or so years after the fall of humanity. the nations of the “old world” went to war, wiping each other off the planet, and all the weapons and bombs and stuff they used shook the world so greatly that portals to other realms opened.

societies kind of built themselves back from the ground up, and for a good few centuries people just lived in smaller settlements scattered across the land. they lived in peace with the magical species from other realms, too.

that is until a new settlement/group of people came in and began assimilating everybody into one county/group and dismantling smaller settlements and forcing them to comply within this new regime (a lot of this story has heaaavy symbolism/commentary on a lot of real world issues if it’s not already obvious).

the only reason why they’re able to do that is because they made death permanent. i think i already explained to you how like one of the realms acted like an afterlife and it was capable to travel back to the real world from it, even if the process was pretty difficult. basically, Some Guy figured out how to close the exit to this realm, and so death became a much realer threat. it’s pretty fucked up

magic kind of got choked out as this new regime settled in, being a closed practice transferred through bloodlines. a lot of the more nature-based magic died out because its holders were hunted for sport, but anyone now in the current day who has magic keeps it closely hidden because the regime will often take magic holders for their own benefit. having magic in this world can guarantee you a lluxurious” life in the center of the country, but you’ll be without freedom or autonomy, and your magic is often used for healing, making deals, “lie detecting”, stuff like that. there’s also more underground settlements that will promise protection to magic folk from the central government, although usually magic folk will be indebted to them too and will have to give some level of servitude, even if it’s not as bad as it could be w/the regime.

all that to say that this regime is a circular country with these large, stupid walls that are made of a mix-match of all kinds of different materials because it’s such a large and unnecessary thing. the walls are centuries old by the current day of the story though, and nobody’s ever really gone outside them before. they’re under the impression that the outside world is a wasteland, which honestly isn’t that far off cause the climate is inspired by utah /hj.

the technology and “aesthetic” of this world is pretty based off of steampunk half because i like the vibes, but i think a lot of the story elements kind of mirror a cyberpunk-esque narrative.

it’s a world where there’s basically always something playing in the background, always content being shoved down people’s throats (literally there’s a whole Thing with mornjng announcements that literally block out the sky). information is commonly hidden and suppressed— people don’t even know what the real night sky looks like because of the light pollution, and think it’s rather absurd to consider there’s more than three or four stars just out there in the universe.

people also don’t know about the afterlife being practically sealed off— they don’t know that death wasn’t always a permanent thing. that’s probably the most closely guarded secret of the entire regime. not even the protagonists, who specialize in “hacking” and releasing classified documents to the public, know this secret until pretty close to the end of the story.

because this government sucks ass, there’s large groups of protestors, and the protagonists are technically considered 2 very influential figures among them. however, because of this, flick gets arrested among the chaos one day, and so the whole like. story kicks off a few months after that where aphid, the other protagonist, is trying to find where he is in the system and get him out of jail (<cause he never even gets sentenced to prison due to the corrupt justice system intentionally keeping protestors from fair trials so they can keep them as long as possible, etc.)

[angelthingy]

this is somewhere inbetween mini vent and not a vent so i’m gonna tag both of them, it’s not a huge deal (mostly cus im honestly in a good mood rn!!!) but it does kinda bother me

it’s so baffling how parents will literally just make up reasons to be mad at u

like my parents were annoyed that we hadn’t gotten out of bed but. my door was closed and- this may come as a shock to u - but i was out of bed- fully dressed - reading a book (it was very satisfying hearing them hesitate after i told them that-)

like. do you just enjoy being annoyed at ur children or something??

i’ll admit this post is coming out kinda out of annoyance because this just. keeps happening and like idk it really gets to u when ur parents kinda just decide to be mad at u for. literally no reason- i’ve just gotten used to it/desensitised at this point but that’s not rly a good thing 🥲

i have nothing against them being annoyed at me in general cus like- i know that im not perfect or anything but when you do it so often for no reason it kinda becomes a boy who cried wolf thing where i instinctively become desensitised even when its for a valid reason because ive had to put up with it even when its completely random,,,,, i wish they’d stop taking out their annoyance at me :(

and it does feel like it’s usually me cus when my younger brother does something pissy (which happens a lot ughhh) she can’t speak to him about it (because he literally just doesn’t listen or shouts a lot and is genuinely like. scary), and she can’t shout at the 9 year old so instead she takes it out on me by making up something to be annoyed about - this isn’t even just speculation she’s literally admitted it (i’m gonna be honest, even though that means she’s admitting i didn’t do anything that doesn’t make me feel any better!!!)

like aaaaaaa it just feels like a really unfair position to be in because sometimes it feels like nothing i do is enough because they just fucking. ignore it anyway so what’s the point of doing it!!! like they were annoyed at me for not helping enough around the house and i was like ok yeah yknow that’s reasonable so i started helping out - but then they were still annoyed at me??? it just felt like my effort was completely pointless so why am i even bothering if its clearly not making a difference????

[frosted-buns]

Hey, I noticed you stating an opinion about trans “egg” terminology and comparing that to Christians going around trying to convert everyone. I get where you’re coming from, 100%, and you’re right that anyone’s gender/sexuality isn’t anyone else’s business. But there’s a huge difference in a trans woman, a heavily oppressed minority, making a joke about someone, and the giant societal force of Christianity forcing people to adhere to their religion, yknow? Christians, particularly the ones who go on missions, are often white cis and straight, and very privileged. Their goals have a death count. Trans women are just making jokes with their friends. It’s not a fair comparison.

Beyond that, many trans women have stated that egg jokes helped them come out and realize that they were trans, while many others have lamented that no one told them they could be trans while they were confused and wondering.

In the end, I believe you are in good faith, but kinda misunderstand the impact of egg jokes. The type of people to be upset (how DARE you think I’m a GIRL because I have long thats ICKY and I would NEVER be a GIRL) are simply (trans)misogynistic, and most supportive cis men don’t really care.

anyway, have a nice day, I hope this helps broaden your understanding or whatever.

I get where you're coming from but unfortunately before I could actually get on hrt I had someone try to get me to by sketchy ass hormones from a site that I don't think exists anymore that only accepted bank transfer payments called "she's a lady". and I unfortunately know someone who groomed a lot of people I know and was a moderator on /r9cute/ which was a ring that would tell little boys they are trans (some may have been actually trans who knows) and make them cut themselves and post pics and would get them hrt. The guy who even recently manipulated me and people I care about. So I am definitely biased towards "egg culture" and "pink pilling" shit with what I've had to deal with.

A lot of the egg stuff never really felt like a joke to me at all and felt more like trying to apply gender to people. I've heard the people going on about "all femboys are eggs!" and stuff like any boy who is slightly feminine or has long hair is an egg. I've also only ever seen it been applied to egg for trans women and never for trans men either so it feels really fetishy like force-femming and "sissyfication" stuff.

It feels like it's often in really bad taste and I've seen it been used as not a joke more than I have seen it used as a joke. Idk maybe that's the autism speaking and I'm missing the nuance or some shit but it's always really seemed gross to do to someone. stuff like it actually pushed me away from trying to start hrt earlier with people suddenly trying to get me to buy sketchy meds off sketchy websites. It made me doubt the process and have distrust for all of the trans community for a while.

I just have never understood it to be jokes at all. If they are jokes it's news to me. people have told me "are you gender fluid??? are you gender flux??? are you bigender???" and trying to assign labels to me like... I just am, woman fits best, possibly slightly nonbinary or something but I really don't like using labels.

[sure-i-exist]

Reasons I think the dragon riders are autistic:

(This was written out of order over the course of several days)

Hiccup

• His interest in dragons. Multiple people literally say “his life is dragons”. I don’t think I need to expand on this point any more

• His deal with emotions - the way it seems to me is that unless he’s very happy or genuinely angry, he doesn’t really emote much? His voice isn’t necessarily monotone but he’s very same-y (in more than just tone - also body language and stuff) almost always aside from when incredibly gleeful (e.g. riding toothless) or very angry (literally any moment where he ends up yelling at the others)

• On a similar note, there’s several times (especially in rtte) where it looks like he’s about to scold someone and then he doesn’t (in a kinda emotions/expressions not lining up with his actual thoughts and stuff way). Now, this doesn’t sound much here but an example is in the dramillion episode near the end of the ep so that kinda gives you a better idea of what I mean yknow?

• Also his massive interest in inventing, another pretty damn important thing in his life that he’s very good at, to say the least. • Another thing with emotions - he’s pretty easy to manipulate. Which sounds so horrible to put but I mean it in like, his emotions specifically are kinda easy to manipulate and especially his empathy. They’re often used against him

• He notices details and you know how he constantly tells the twins they’re geniuses after something they say reminds him of a completely unrelated point? Yeah idk how to explain it but that’s autism, baby

Astrid

• Stubborn - it takes a lot to change her views of opinions

• Fully believes there are right and wrong ways of doing things (and usually believes those ways are the more traditional ways that she’s used to)

• Idk if there’s even proof of this but I am dead certain she sticks to her rules almost all times. She doesn’t care about other peoples rules but despite that often has very strict views on how to do things which I think is why I believe this. She also hates going off-plan and that doesn’t rlly mean anything here but that probably adds to why I’m so sure she likes rules

• Again no proof of this but she seems like the type to be very particular about her daily routine. If she decides to switch it up once she now gonna keep that for months. You can ignore this point but this is something I wholeheartedly believe.

• The vibes

Fishlegs

• He’s honestly the only character who might have actually been written as autistic (but also may not have been and instead be written as a nerd, but obviously that trope alone just makes him autistic by default)

• Same as hiccup, huge huge interest in dragons. No need to elaborate here

• Very empathetic, many autistic people experience either notably low empathy or high empathy. Fishlegs very clearly is on the high side

• Also can I just say I love how on berk he was a guide and he taught kids all about berks history and dragons and shit like that like hell yeah making your special interest your job, good for him honestly

• I just watched legend of the boneknapper and I just noticed fishlegs talks with his hands a lot and makes a bunch of gestures while talking which I am absolutely counting here cause i want to

Snotlout

• Hand gestures. Like all the time. And a lot of the same ones. And I’ve got no clue if that actually is prevalent in autism or whatever but personal experience (I.e. me and my friends) suggest so + I relate so I’m counting it

• Gonna sound dumb, but “shut up, [name]” and just common phrases he repeats. • On that note: he yells his own name frequently (typically while doing something cool or when annoyed or etc. emotional reasons) and I interpret that as kinda a stim, helping with emotions type deal yknow? • Again related to that, ‘Snotlout Snotlout oi oi oi’ (copied from spitelouts own version) is absolutely a vocal stim, and while I’m like 80% sure copying vocal patterns and phrases from the people around you is a thing everyone does, I’m still counting it anyway • Very big emotions/kinda dramatic. Idk how to phrase this but at any given point it is very clear what Snotlouts emotions are - and I know a lot of autistic folk (myself included) are generally quite monotone or struggle with expressing emotion outwardly, but this feels right so again counting it. + exaggerating emotions is a thing I do all the time to make things more obvious

• Hate to say this one but just the general way he treats people - he often doesn’t notice the way people react and he just continues with his (often pretty shit) treatment of them, can be seen in the unwanted advancements towards Astrid Heather etc and how certainly initially he didn’t rlly seem to get the message

• To put the last point more clearly: this boy has the absolute worst social skills and has no idea about that

• He doesn’t always get when people are making fun of him or being sarcastic

• I mention this with Tuffnut as well, but Snotlouts also pretty sarcastic even tho he doesn’t always get other peoples sarcasm

• He’s pretty blunt. Or he confuses himself with his own words. That’s pretty much the two sides of Snotlout’s speech patterns

• he’s my favourite character <3

Ruffnut

• Her whole deal with violence, particularly in rob/dob - I don’t know how to describe it but something about that

• Her and Tuffnut both get like random interests and they know loads about it or otherwise devote a lot of time to it - e.g. science when they were sick with eel pox, theatre in Total Nightmare, other examples I’m sure but I can’t remember rn. It just reminds me of myself and hyperfixations I get

• She doesn’t really care to change how she acts around different people; regardless of whether she’s been captured by enemies, is being scolded by Hiccup or is setting up a prank with tuffnut, she’s always the same.

• On that note, she’s often pretty blunt. Like unless she’s talkin fancy deliberately or trying to trick someone shes usually pretty clear and doesn’t usually change how she acts or speaks to make others feel better. • Yknow how her and Tuffnut were all like “woah maybe we did something… right? […] what’s this feeling is this accomplishment? I’ve never felt this before” and stuff that one time? I know it’s played off as a joke, but I’m diagnosing that with same <3

• Mirroring speech (see briefly in tuffnuts section)

Tuffnut

• Similar thing with violence

• Same as the hyperfixations thing I mentioned with Ruffnut, and just know there are plenty of things they say that I attribute to past hyperfixations

• Several occasions where he doesn’t get sarcasm

• He is pretty sarcastic tho despite that, same with Snotlout and that is something I feel is quite common - not really getting other peoples jokes or sarcasm but doing so yourself a lot

• His speech is very reminiscent of my own, he talks kinda overly fancy and deliberate most of the time (but there are also occasions where he’s almost overly casual? Which again is very relatable to me. I am now realising I may or may not have accidentally stolen tuffnuts speech patterns as a kid)

• (To the last point ignoring the part at the end) Ruffnut is also similar in this respect (as in the deliberate kinda overly wordy talk) but usually to a lesser extent - in fact, she normally only speaks like that when tuffnut is also there and speaking in such way, which to me absolutely seems like mirroring

• Similarly to the sarcasm thing, he doesn’t get rhetorical questions. Or at the very least doesn’t get them in that one episode in rtte and that’s enough for me to count it here

To be clear, at the end of the day, I see them all as autistic mostly cause I relate to and connect with the characters. And I do not know how to put that into words clearly so here’s this mess of a compilation.

@louthestarspeaker @tiggster27 @we-are-not-the-losechesters @drekialba @qualityhistorygamingwinner @maluron @scared-nightnurse @famderfries @purpleshutin @rubysparx @nonbinarynightmare77 @macabre-changeling @paradoxical-hermitcrab @bad-girl-coven

[spicyicymeloncat]

Ooh, maybe Morro for the doodle and opinions game thing lol 👀

Morro

Ahhh shadow the hedgehog! I mean, Morro. I’ll be honest tho, this guy has some wasted potential both in universe and as a writing standpoint. I love a good edgy parallel main character and he definitely has an interesting backstory and I wish we got more of him. Idk this is an unpopular opinion but s5 isn’t my favourite (although as I say that, I watched the first 3 episodes this morning and really enjoyed it lol) since it’s a little all over the place. But he’s still very interesting so I’ll get into it. (Note after drawing him and over analysing him for like an hour, I like him even more than I did when I started writing this lol)

(Ps: currently as of this post, I have no more suggestions so feel free to spam my inbox bc I like writing essays on legos and also drawing)

Morro is actually an orphan (or abandoned idk) which is big sad, and Wu finds him when he’s pretty young and he looks pretty experienced in foraging bins for trash which suggests he’s been alone for a while. Although it’s interesting he, as an orphan child, decided he specifically wanted to climb that huge ass mountain to find rubbish. Maybe he’s always been ambitious and decided “yep I can climb a mountain” or maybe he caused trouble in a village somewhere and had to run away, and decided the mountain was a safe, quiet bet. Either I love how Wu found a child and was like “yeah I’ll teach it to kill”. I don’t think Wu should’ve been allowed to have a child actually. But I’ve noticed, in Ghost Story, Wu talked about how when the fsm died he said he’d leave a message to find his tomb and Wu never found it. Kinda sounds like Wu has daddy issues. And so this arc is now about generational trauma. I think the fsm, yknow as an escapee of war himself, probably raised Wu and Garmadon quite strictly and Wu probably grew up with a lot of pressure, first as practically a demigod, and second as one who bares the duty of stopping/saving his brother from evil. So what does a man who was raised as a warrior at a young age do when he sees a young child? Try and raise it in the only way he knew how. Wu also having to deal with Garmadon leaving and also getting ghosted by Misako at the same time so I think Morro’s company would’ve been nice. The discovery of Morro’s elemental power is interesting because we know that wind was one of the elements, the fsm hadn’t mastered, so wu may have never even encountered it. Also since a lot of the elemental masters are shown to be fighters, it might mean that the EMs typically take up some sort of fighting job in general. Could that mean Morro’s parents may have died or got lost to combat? Maybe that’s why he had his powers so young. The more you think about it, the more tragic it gets. I think, with how much of a good omen Morro seemed to be, Wu probably expected he was the green ninja. Morro definitely would’ve had some hero complex, he came in, made his master’s life a lot less lonely, he’s gonna save the world and help Wu fix things with his family. And when he’s not that, he ends up doing a lot of unnecessary and concerning things to prove himself. He gets a little loopy (and honestly it would’ve been sick if they leaned into that in the present plot actually). Morro ends up leaving to go find the Fsm’s tomb and mannn you can tell how brutally militant the fsm and Wu’s relationship was when the former literally makes visiting his grave a test of honour for his son (Ik he also was hiding the realm Crystal but yeah). And Morro leaves. Which is such a L, especially for Wu considering Wu’s father left him with barely a hint of where he died, Garmadon left him to train far away, Misako also, like everyone leaves Wu. Maybe that’s why Wu didn’t go after him. Not only did Wu tell Morro about the green ninja but also about the fsm’s tomb which lead him to his death, so yeah it makes sense why Wu would be so secretive. Because not only did the prophecy push Morro over the edge, if Wu never talked about his father Morro may not have died.

Morro has a really cool intro to the series, from the VA change of the night guard, to Lloyd screaming off screen, and then the fight at the monastery in the dark, his aesthetic, pathetic fallacy (cool weather sets the mood) and his theme, it’s very cool. I do wish though, we got more of a visualisation of Lloyd and Morro fighting for control it could even have tied back to Garmadon and his evilisation yknow? Also Morro unfortunately has a redemption at death arc which is generally disappointing. He changes his mind about all his bitterness without really any reasoning. Wu doesn’t do anything in the season really until at the very last moment, and it just comes out of nowhere. Like s5 is not on my rewrite list but if I could change anything, one of those things would be giving Morro internal conflict. Make Morro feel Lloyd’s love for his family, make Morro briefly doubt what he’s doing and miss Wu. And mannn I wish Wu played more of a role in this season, in regards to Morro. Like Wu never got to see his own father’s tomb.

I get it though, there’s a lot happening with wu already since he’s trying Nya. I do like how he’s reluctant to tell Nya about her powers especially in the season where the villain is a villain because Wu said too much. Morro and Nya also have a few parallels, both are unable to handle failure and struggle to adapt when their life changes. It’s cool because we get to see Nya succeed where Morro didn’t (and that’s why she’s allowed to wear green). I think honestly this season should’ve had more Kai development considering Kai and Morro basically have the same plot, and it would’ve really wrapped up the staff scene in s4. Like maybe with Kai telling Morro of how he avoided being like him, how Kai chose to protect others instead of trying to earn a title that he didn’t need. Maybe that would have then played into Morro’s redemption later on.

Also how come Morro got sent the cursed realm? Well I have a theory but this is basically Ninjago speed run angst percentage. So to go to the cursed realm ya got to get cursed. So what if Morro managed to curse himself? Like his swore he’d find the tomb or else he’d go to the cursed realm and him making a verbal oath actually held weight because spooky superstition. Maybe he dabbled in dark magic to help him on his quest. Idk I just think it’s poetic that Morro’s downfall is himself. Although I wish I knew why he ended up being the preeminent’s lackey. Hmm here’s a suggestion, the preeminent, in true eldritch horror fashion, is like a goddess, like the compelling call of destiny, that has dubbed Morro as her own “chosen one”, which is why he has the highest status of all the ghosts. I just need the preeminent to be creepy.

All in all I think Morro has a really good set up I just wish we got more of a learning arc for him, just to back up his redemption. Villains like the overlord, or the Oni don’t need character development because they only need to be strong, and villains like Chen and Nadakhan don’t need development because they can just be incredibly smart from the get go. But villains that have shifting moralities need to get justification on why that is the case and with Morro and Harumi, imo I think Ninjago drops the ball, and their final moments of not being awful feel very rushed. Also I love Morro aesthetic and think he should be even more insane actually, have him be weirdly connected to the preeminent and also have him be almost delusional in his quest for power because it would be spicy. But in general, Morro is super interesting and that’s why I think fanon is more popular, because people like to lean in and see if they can push Morro where the writers didn’t (although it’s more likely fanon Morro is just popular because he’s emo). Also a note about DotD, I actually love that special mostly for the villain interactions because it’s just gorgeous. Now that Morro is over his intensely huge drama Queen arc, when placed next to the other he’s kinda chill and love the fact when he shows up he scares the life out of the other ninja, but he’s actually pretty civil and other than he can’t help himself from acting villainous. But he has a sense of honour and yknow he probably would’ve made for a great ninja.

Here’s a random hc to close this off, Morro actually loved pirates and would’ve had the time of his life if he was around for s6.

But that’s it for now! Morro good.

[thenamesblurrito]

ask dump... what is this. twelve?

something like that. topics this time include: weather, propaganda songs, catchphrases, living inside a mechanimal, black markets, centipede watch, martial arts, backpacks, paintball, and Rhinox

Cybertron is not a very wet planet, so there’s not actually a lot of precipitation in most places. when there is, it’s definitely water, although often acidic and impure. there’s permanent ice caps at the poles, and it can get cold enough to rain dry ice. wind and dust are more commonly tracked weather patterns than humidity, although high humidity and occasional heavy precipitation still occur, they’re just guided by the planetary weather department. floods are very common in the Rust Sea, since it’s a seasonal floodplain in an endorheic basin. flooding is actually a major problem everywhere else, even though it’s a very rare problem. soil isn’t really a thing, and most of Cybertron is bad at absorbing water, so flash floods can be huge until they find a crack or canyon or porous material to soak through. underground cities especially need to be designed with this in mind

standing out in the rain isn’t actually a big deal for most mecha! water is iffy when submersed in it, but not inherently dangerous. your car will be okay in the rain, but not driving into the ocean, yknow? the average person spending hours in a torrential downpour may end up with some water damage, but it’s not a big worry unless they’re particularly delicate. honestly more people are concerned with acidity rather than water damage! flightframes flying through storms or who live near the poles or higher mountains do have to contend with ice buildup, which is a concern because of wing shape and weight rather than wetness

Velocitron is a desert that sees little to no precipitation, although it isn’t so hot as to be unbearable in SNAP so folks do go out into the sunlight. Caminus has a lot more water and thus wetter weather, Devisiun is two dry planets, and Eukaris actually has proper oceans. Carcer is like a blend of Cybertron’s metals and Velocitron’s rocky desert

yknow i’ve been sitting on this one for awhile and i still don’t know! i’m not well versed in this area tbh. i imagine there are city-state and planetary anthems, historical ballads about the might of the Stratocracy, religious hymns edited to include functionist values as praise, and old folk tunes taken and repurposed as patriotic songs. and of course as their equal opposite there are workers’ songs, old miners chants and spacer shanties, complaints about the government put in a rhyme and a metaphor and hummed on the job, junker ditties traded as a game on the street, and soulful songs calling for the Primes or the Guiding Hand to come sweep away the evils of this world. and all the other types in this marvelous post

of COURSE they do, this is in the ANIME genre! the sort of general faction catchphrases are in this lil chart here, eg the Autobots with the classic “Roll out!” that Optimus says and “Peace by example!” summing up their ideology. i also tried to come up with snappy descriptions for these tech specs that aren’t exactly catchphrases but fall in that same general area. otherwise, i am going to sneak in as many quotes, references, Easter eggs, and Furmanisms as possible

(the post this is referring to)

definitely not very survivable. or, maybe survivable, technically, but not super livable or thriveable. they are animals, not vehicles, and they don’t really turn into vehicles either. so while maybe you could fit inside, idk, ballast tanks, or air sacs, or something, it’s going to be uncomfortable, because you are Inside The Internal Organs Of A Living Creature. you will also definitely be setting off a critical immune response in said living creature bc debris isn’t supposed to be inside there, or worse, parasites. because honestly that’s what you’d be, a parasite. if you want to live comfortably inside a living creature, you’ll have to dig up some fairytales and find a Titan

aafdja;slgheuorjlhfhd the way you phrased this, anon-- jwrgohjjf

there’s certainly organized crime rings, mobs and mafias, and black markets that do focus on the smuggling of contraband or goods or even people. Thunderhoof is definitely not involved with any of these shhhh thanks. Lockdown totally isn’t involved either, and Rum-Maj absolutely has no connections to the underground markets of junkers. actually this is a niche i have Shadow Striker filling but she is so far in the background as to be invisible in SNAP’s story

in general i mean a lot of black market stuff is more illegal than automatically evil? like yes outlawed goods and services could certainly be immoral but they could also just be illegal as a method of control, it will depend on the situation in question. technically mechanimal parts sold for consumption are black market items, which is completely ignored on Carcer. when Maccadam preps a mechanimal dish from Carcer for school lunch, he is absolutely dealing in black market trading. which, cmon, it’s Maccadam. he knows how to skirt the consequences

i think perhaps the biggest arguably “non evil” black market is every junker trader, vendor, and fence. they don’t have functions so they technically aren’t allowed to do any sort of business, but they do anyway, and the illegality automatically makes them the widest spread and most ubiquitous black market. and it’s all like, innocuous stuff to just barely scrape by. recycled stuff out of the trash, scraps and hastily repaired items, maybe some handmade doohickeys. they largely trade amongst one another and very low caste mecha so they don’t risk catching anyone’s attention. they’re doing this for survival and barebones enrichment, not high risk items and giant trades. patronizing a junker market is a good way to support them, theoretically, but if you aren’t already 100% proven ride or die best buddies with a junker, good luck ever finding a market. they are not risking their safety so some strangers can buy their trinkets, that’s how they get empurata’d or worse. the locations vary and the vendors vary and the everything varies all the time, so there’s no real constants i can describe, but perhaps the most wanted items junkers would trade for would be medical supplies, hygiene supplies, fresh energon, and upgrade stockpiles for the gutter children. a communal benefit rather than individual profit

yknow i haven’t really thought about it? i feel like it would be a good insecticon species, and i like the idea of a parasitic/symbiotic relationship, but mecha are pretty averse to other things attaching to their bodies like that. i mean what do you want, a virus or something?? gross! it’d be like wearing a leech as a fashion accessory (and before you ask, no there’s not really any medical usage of these or any other mechanimal, largely due to how they can’t be domesticated and only spottily trained, and there’s just so many better tools to use)

however i think this would fit a niche as a parasite on other mechanimals for certain, especially ones with stiff plating and bulky kibble that can’t get around to pry them off

oh sure! and like there’s established martial arts on Cybertron too, not just on the colonies. it’s an ancient thing that’s not exactly something you can erase within a single totalitarian regime, if only for the outcries of “cultural desecration”. boxing is a thing here, Grandus and Star Upper are both notable boxing champs. fencing is a thing too, Star Saber and Wing both practice fencing as a hobby. there’s this whole post that includes fight dancing. it’s considered distasteful, but it’s also basically the place the excessively violent are shunted off to in order to express their urges and temper their anger. a very patronizing sort of allowance

actual martial arts include all the stuff you see in canon, like metallikato and jet judo. Yoketron is a benefactor of the JAAT and runs a dojo that teaches all the major forms. technically this is just for historical and cultural preservation, and it’s mostly actors, dancers, or athletes who come train under him with the excuse that the physical competence they learn can directly relate to their functions. there are very few, very regulated tournaments or competitions, and anyone looking to become a martial arts master themselves must petition to have their function switched to this specific thing. it’s generally much easier to get into martial arts on the colonies for certain, and on Carcer if you don’t know how to throw a punch by the time you’re a youngling you’re going to get hurt, so there’s definitely fluctuating levels of allowed and expected violence between cultures here. mecha are durable, sure, but two similar frametypes are likely to be fairly equally matched, so minor injuries are okay. the one universally official rule everywhere is no triggering of entrapment protocols

definitely, they don’t all have subspace and even digital things need some physical reader to be stored! typically most grounders have it easy, because trailers like Orion’s are pretty simple to work with, and may function as more than just storage. flight frames often have a little storage space in their own cockpits, like a natural pocket, but any cargo more than that and they’ll find it difficult to tote around, unless they’re a big flightframe with a lot of interior cargo space (which isn’t very common in this canon!). many frametypes have little pockets like this, even beast and toolformers, although it’s not going to manifest as a cockpit

most bags, backpacks, and other personal storage units must be designed to latch onto a mech as another piece of kibble, transforming along with them so as not to inhibit their alt mode or anything. so bags are more like streamlined boxes, manufactured person by person since there’s no standard frametype, and everyone has a size and weight limit simply by their own bodyplan. it’ll vary widely, and i think these personal storage units are a major staple of their “fashion” industry, which focuses on what we’d recognize as clothing maybe only 40% of the time. everyday simple objects like comms or IDs are designed to fit into even very small storage spaces for almost any frametype, and some things can clip on or magnetize to plating for safekeeping in absence of pockets

fsflgjlfjsdsj yeah yeah i think it is! not all paint is good, and not all paint is beneficial, but i think it’d be edible, if messy. maybe closer to food coloring than actual food itself? paintball would be a cool foodfight. it’d also work in bauble tea, or as sprinkles and fancy food toppers, or lil gummy balls

he does exist, he’s one of the JAAT teachers, he teaches a social studies class on community coordination. he’s not one of the ones i picked as a monster of the week, but i like that idea... maybe a swapsies au...

[yoshkeii]

Ushijima Wakatoshi hcs!

࿐ character: Ushijima Wakatoshi

࿐ genre: sfw, nsfw

࿐ requested by: a lovely supportive friend <3

⌦ sfw first, nsfw last

⌦ Nsfw includes, top-dom!ushijima, sub-bottom!reader. Continue at your own risk.

A/N: i simp for this man. i actually simp for a lot of characters its unbelievable. but this one. this man. yeah. again, kinda self-indulgent like my tsukii one- im sorry,,

══════ SFW ══════

★彡 Since we all know how Ushijima talks in the anime, he probably doesn't have the best social cues. When being in a relationship with him it might be difficult for him to break through that barrier of communication. He might say things along "will you teach me?", "was that good?", and stuff along those lines. So its your job to show him the ropes! It's a up and down hill path but Ushijima will do it to make the relationship last long and anything to see that little adorable smile on your face.

★彡 Honestly some nicknames he will have for you might derive from plants and nature. Such as "Honey(comb), Pumpkin, Sprout, Fern, Clover," but the classic nicknames that are normal to relationships would be "Babe/Baby, Prince, Love, Beautiful/Handsome," etc~ He likes to stick with the planty ones since he believes it fits someone smaller than him.

★彡 Will definitely take advantage of your size difference (depending on your height, yknow when yknow. i myself is like 5'3/5'4 so i feel the short pain.)

★彡 Like he will ruffle your hair which always ends up getting messed up, he will pick you so fucking easily like you weigh nothing to him, definite big spoon cause he always loves to wrap his arms arounds you since he noticed how safe it makes you feel, comparing and teasing about your hand sizes too is a common occurrence. Just his palm against yours. Sometimes you guys mess around with the flashlights on your phone to create hand-shadows and you always try to adjust your hand for your shadow to be Ushijima's size. He chuckles at the adorable attempt too.

★彡 Continuing on the size difference, he will let you sit on his lap as he watches you do whatever infront of him. No matter if its just scrolling through social media, watching videos, watching you play games, a movie, a video call? He's there. Sometimes will silently nuzzle his face into your hair, neck, shoulder or the crook between your shoulders. If he's feeling like it, he might also plant a surprise kiss on your neck or shoulder. It sends a quick jolt and shiver down your spine whenever he does because it's so unlikely-

★彡 OKAY BUT- the thought of jealous Ushijima would not be common thing knowing how calm and composed this man is, but he is also not good at describing nor showing emotions. But- Him catching you wearing someone else's jersey, hoodie, or jacket might flip that switch. He would just brush it off at first after awhile, before he slowly breaks. Giving you his own clothing in the end, which always ends up oversized based on how this dude is built. This would honestly be the only chance or time you will see this man be jealous its kinda scary- like- Ushijima are you okay honey?

★彡 Ushijima isn't the one to be into nicknames too much, but when you call him by the given nicknames you have for him... ohhhhhhh maaaaan its gives him butterflies. And generally he can't understand feelings too well so he wouldn't know how to deal with it and maybe overthink it- Please comfort him if it goes to far- He'll need it-

★彡 Like the Tendou chapter, you would most likely be closer to Tendou since Ushi and him are close anyways! You'll also have decent relationships with the team and maybe act like the motherly type to them to keep those boys in check. Goshiki may awkwardly talk to you to see if he needs to be in a relationship to be the new ace yada yada (lil baby looking up to your husbando though is cute-)

★彡 Ushijima may not be the best at social cues, but ohhh man this dude can be poetic as hell unintentionally. He has his ways of setting up words and his surprisingly sets of word choices astonish you at some point, and of course you get confuse sometimes- Understanding poems can be hard as hell okay??

★彡 When seeing you stressed or overwhelmed with any situation, he'll bring you into a hug for who knows how long. Just him seeing you like that devastates him, same goes for a single tear coming from your face will make this man go in his overprotective mode. He'll rub your back or head to calm you down, some specks of kisses along your face and maybe your arms too. He doesn't let his hand wander anywhere else when cuddling either so you are in safe hands with this man everytime he has his arms around you. They are just like safe warm walls bro.

★彡 He's the type who will keep attention on the smallest of details about you. He'll buy you small things like stickers, utensil, items, etc that you thought were cute when browsing or something. Ushijima likes to hear about your interests and thoughts because he loves to see you nerd out over passionate topics, and sometimes he'll just doze off and just stare at your face as you talk. Admiring you so fucking much, he's just softly smiling at you till you ask "what Toshi-?"

══════ NSFW ══════

★彡 Most of your passionate moments always start with kisses. They are usually or might as well always be slow, soft and passionate. He'll try his best to ask for consent in the most intimate or romantic way possible, with just a soft reply or the brush of his thumb on your bottom lip. Or he might aswell just stare at you till you say sumn-

★彡 He's not the type for PDA, since he personally thinks it should be behind doors and walls. So if you do anything that will.. yknow... flip a switch in this man. He'll try to keep composure n calmness till both of you are in a private spot, this man will kabedon or pin you against the wall and smother you with love n affection. At this point, he can't keep his hands to himself and often wanders which is unusual for him. So do things wisely or are you just a lover for punishment.

★彡 Some kinks this man will have: definite daddy/captain kink, degrading/praising (depends on his mood or how you are acting in the.. act-), extreme dirty talk, overstimulation maybe?, honestly can be into BDSM or sumn along the line, little bit of foreplay too.

★彡 You definitely know this man can get hella rough and strong while doing it. Which he of course uses it as an advantage because he's a fucking huge ass dom. Try to take control at least once, he'll do an uno reverse card on you and have you begging moments later. Even if you're on top, he still has control. He'll use his strong grip to pull you down or to make you move how he wants you too, His grip is so strong, it leaves nail marks in your hips n thighs that make you complain to him about it. But Ushijima just will look at you with no regret.

★彡 Ushijima uses his voice to his biggest advantage aswell. He knows he can rile you up with just a deep husk of his voice, especially when he speaks in your ear. His hot breath brushing against as he speaks sweet nothings to demanding whispers only you can hear. It just makes you melt and submit to him like magic, and he adores that to the max. He'll also might bite your ear as a tease too-

★彡 He's very demanding in bed. Ordering you around. Him being a very serious person outside of the room follows him into the bed.

★彡 Favorite place to do it? Just in the private walls of eachother's home or dorms.

★彡 Favorite position? He has a few selected one, but him carrying you will messing your insides up against a wall... yeah that one.

★彡 He loves, loves seeing your face during the act. He'll just stares at you with a cocky smirk (no pun intended) as he continues.

★彡 Ushijima may be rough, but he's a king at aftercare. He loves to treat you so well after the act with cuddles, kisses, a possible bath or shower, massages. Anything to calm you down. Usually its just cuddles, seeing you ontop of his chest practically about to fall asleep. Knowing you are listening to his heartbeat and breathing, its a beautiful sight to him. If you are cuddling on your side, he'll softly pat your head and rub your back as you dose off to sleep before he falls asleep himself afterwards.

★彡 Motivation can vary, but he loves seeing you wear anything that shows your bare legs. Especially those thighs. Yes another thigh man. Just some high-thigh socks, tights, fitted sweatpants, anything that shows your curves n legs gets him rearing to go.

[mde1011]

when i got into the dsmp i started a note and wrote down any quotes or moments i thought were funny, and im bored at 3 am so enjoy some of them

how is being arrested real? just walk away!!!”

⁃ “once an american always an american. go...go protests masks...or something”

⁃ “...yEAH BUT DID YOU HAVE WAP” “what’s...whats wap?” “...WORSHIP AND PRAYER”

⁃ “HOW DO YOU LIKE POLITICS MOTHERFUCKER”

⁃ “i’m naked” “...no you’re not” “i can be...”

⁃ “uhhhh i’m in a high stress situation....i deal with these poorly”

⁃ “i should go first i’m naked”

⁃ “yEAHHHH WE KILLED AN OLD MAN WITH HEART PROBLEMS”

⁃ “what are you going to do?” “i...have no idea i think i’m gonna start out by punching a tree”

⁃ “tOmmy...did i just hear you say shit ass looking mofo?”

⁃ “i aM gOinG to gEt nAkeD to iNtiMidAtE HiM”

- “...i want freedom !” “you want BALLS.”

⁃ “...down the line. yeah that’s where we discover the art of cannibalism” “oh it’s an art?” “it’s an art”

⁃ “oh there’s some logs here. wonder what they’re saying to me. uh huh. uh huh. oh yeah that’s very racist” “tommy you gotta burn those logs.” “burn ‘em before they spread their racism to other logs”

⁃ “are you pooing?” “*whisper* i’m charging up-““ “he’s ejaculating on the tent.” “he’s WHAT?”

⁃ “he’s sPEEDING. LOOK HOW FAST HES GOING” “i’ve taken so many drugs. someone tell badboyhalo”

⁃ “we should make a pact. and that pact is, uh, we make a book...and in that book...we declare that saying ‘muffin’ is a, is a slur”

⁃ “i was thinking what if one day your bladder just,,,,stopped working.....AGGGFFFFF i was tHINKING ABOUT THAT THE OTHER DAY IVE GOT TO PREPARE IVE GOT YO PREPARE thisiswhydiapersaintthatbad”

⁃ <sapnap> i think i was ordered to um

<tommyinnit> boobed

<sapnap> kill you

<tommyinnit> boobs

<sapnap> if this happens

<tommyinnit> think about boobs man

<sapnap> tsk tsk tommy

<tommyinnit> iM DISGRUNTLED

⁃ “why is this deadman so good at making drugs”

⁃ “i just learnt that a girl hero is called a heroine and it freaked me out”

⁃ “memento memento me-“ “that’s actually the worst word i know so you can’t keep saying that” “oh, really.....? have you ever heard the term ‘racist’?”

⁃ “the person who invented the phrase ‘be yourself’ hadn’t met you!”

⁃ “you seem like the type of guy whose dad would throw him overboard as a joke but he would just drown”

⁃ “shout out to dream for twerking!”

⁃ “let’s talk......let’s talk about sex” “wonderful. what do you think about sex, lazarbeam?” “i ain’t saying SHIT in front of a sixteen year old”

⁃ “what the- i think i’m seeing things” “....tommy i told you not to drink the sea water” “well i DID drink the sea water because it TOLD ME TO”

⁃ “it’s like the movie when that guy gets stranded on an island and has sex with a coconut” “whAT?? dream- dream, you vastly misinterpreted this” “it one hundred percent does”

⁃ “oh mastICATE.....isn’t that when a fish turns inside out?”

⁃ “what are some bad words YOU know, clay?” “i don’t-“ “what about ‘terrorist’?”

⁃ “my mind has to be on the same frequency as jesus when he walked on water”

⁃ “you wanna know why i was late?” “no i really do-“ “i was having a MASSIVE poo. really just a HUGE poo”

⁃ “jUST CUZ YOU TALK ABOUT POO ONCE AND THEN YOU SEE A BIG GREEN BASTARD AMD YOUR LIFE IS FLASHING BEFORE YOUR EYES AND THEN YOU CANT REMEMBER- YOU CANT REMEMBER IF IT WAS YESTERDAY OR TOMORROW YOU HURT THAT WOMAN”

⁃ “i love america. mmmmm patriotism

⁃ “LIFE IS NOT A HAPPY SONG KERMIT THE FROG”

⁃ “please stop taking the cock”

⁃ “two four six eight who do we appreciate? not the government let’s gooooooo”

⁃ “oooo look at the dogs😍” “wHAAAAAT. WHAT. THERES ACTUALLY LIKE. A MILLION DOGS HERE. WHAT THE HELL.”

⁃ “yeahhhhh bitch i stab- i don’t stab women-“ “woooooooah tommy you stab women?” “heyyyy sapnap”

⁃ “do you know what happens whne you reach the top of the ladder? there’s only one place to go.” “.....side to side😨” “down.” “...i really thought you were gonna say side to side🥺”

⁃ “one last time.” “just like in hamilton😓”

⁃ “you don’t know how many times i’ve mistaken trees for hot women”

⁃ “ i don’t feel better i just destroyed penis”

⁃ “i’ve never seen a snail with bad morals”

⁃ “awwwwwwww😢 i’m doin’ drugs🤧 just like the good ol’ days😓” “.....define the ‘good old days’” “back when i did drugs”

⁃ “have you ever fought a baby? i have and it was trivially easy to defeat, phil.”

⁃ “the only other i egg i know about was the one i learnt about in school....not allowed to say which one....”

⁃ “did you know one of my new years resolutions is to be more like 2010 justin bieber?”

⁃ “apparently cats don’t lay eggs”

⁃ “thinking about trees- if i saw a tree with a beard mmmmmm...holy shit id hit it”

⁃ “we’re in hell dude. science doesn’t matter here”

⁃ “i cant die i cant die i’m GOD”

⁃ “hey pig your letter is the same as pussy, hmm?”

⁃ “are we cool are we COOL guys? CRYSTAL COOL like CRYSTAL METH”

⁃ “he- he’s crying because - because i killed his mother isn’t that right? mother dearest mother deadest mother gonest”

⁃ “bro ive been drinking since i was six and let me tell you...it’s not good to be drinking that young. led to some poor life decisions when i was 8” “what did you do” “i cant say” “...who did you hurt” “....only myself”

⁃ “je suis” “ay i know what that mean you prick” “what does it mean” “it means you’re racist dickhead”

⁃ “i’d never poo in the presence of a women- which is why i’m scared to get a girlfriend i think i’d just explode”

⁃ “biff tannen is one of my idols”

⁃ “black widow died and i thought ‘wow it should’ve been the man’ because he’s a man”

⁃ “there’s a character called captain america and i think he’s stupid”

⁃ “i’m a GOOD LAD i’ve got GOOD MORALS and if i’ve DONE SOMETHING WRONG it WASNT MY FAULT I JUST GOT A LITTLE EXCITED”

⁃ “sam....what’s the longest you’ve ever wiped your arse? for me it’s 48 minutes”

⁃ “why are you standing in the shitter?” “....that’s a SINK” “uhhh welllll” “hAVE YOU SHAT IN THE SINK?????”

⁃ “you’re like a living ghost” “...i think that’s called a human, tubbo”

⁃ “maybe i accidentally kill ranboo and we just never see him again *laughs* ay? and then i go ‘april foooools!!!’ and then i kill their child. i kill him”

⁃ “you built a penis” “it’s a PENIS OF SAFETY”

⁃ “i saw the penis of safety and i pressed mouse button four my friend”

⁃ “the penis on the other side of the river is larger” “ive heard that before....”

⁃ “you’ve turned the penis into a wall” “a wall of safety is better than a penis of safety” “i think the penis was better”

⁃ “if you wanna make a penis i know where we can make a penis and i know how big we can make it”

⁃ “i don’t conceptualize death but i think i just saw it!”

⁃ “yeah i- yeah i know i’m- my first impression on eret was making him read a shrek fan fiction so- i’m not one for first impressions”

⁃ “i-i’m scared for him- i’m scared OF him. yknow the first thing he did when he saw me was imMEDIATELY strip down then jump off then immediately die?”

⁃ “where are you?” “getting stabbed, one second”

⁃ “you’ve seen the joker?” “yea-“ “i resonate a lot with that man” “...oH. oh. that’s- that’s not-“

⁃ “he bURNT DOWN MY HOUSE” “out of LOVE”

⁃ “ohhhh my god stop making me play with the neighbor kid” “o-okay if you don’t go play with him i’m kicking you out of the house-“ “wHAT THE FUCK???”

⁃ “there’s a STRIP CLUB” “oh yeah for wood!” “are you into strippers?” “i mean all it does is make the wood look different so....yeah it doesn’t really do much”

⁃ “no no we have categories, we have the poo-saster- you might have to take a shower after-“ “no, no i’m gonna stop you right there”

⁃ “as i was saying you can have a 1-to-3 wiper, that’s an A-tier poo, my friend”

⁃ “i want you to eat your sock”

⁃ “you know i’m a child- i’m a minor” “sO AM I DICKHEAD”

⁃ “everyone is calling you dresus” “yeah i am”

⁃ “ayyyy ayyyy los DROGAS LOS DROGAS” “no no big q- she’s thirteen- how does this happen with every 13 year old girl you meet?”

⁃ “my poo has muscles like i do”

⁃ “i cant hear the words among us without crying they’ll say there are aliens among us and in the back youll just hear me *choking noises*”

⁃ “tubbo...tubbo is like...tubbo is like mary” “.....did you just call me the Virgin Mary?”

⁃ “i’m just saying, have you ever seen me and jesus in the same room?”

⁃ “do you smoke sam” “all the time”

⁃ “i thought you were talking about the- the speeeeed drug”

⁃ “have you ever sold drugs to kids sam?” “......no”

⁃ “we can’t let the girlboss rule because she will gatekeepe my feelings” “that would not be good”

⁃ “THEY DIDNT INVITE ME TO KILL ME???? NOW I HAVE FOMO”

⁃ “you have obviously taken part in scientology-“ “i have not-“ “you’ve donated to tom cruises cult shit”

⁃ “....am i worse than david dobrik?” “are- are we worse than david dobrik?” “oh- oh god”

⁃ “he has broke one of the rules of the hit best seller ‘the bible’- this kind of looks like a cock”

⁃ “well i’ve moved now, KING”

⁃ “what is an angsty teen and am i one? because when i USED to hang out with my friends they use the word angst a lot”

⁃ “yeah yeah yeah i bench”

⁃ “sam i think i’m angsty i think i’m an angsty tik tok teen looking for a community to help me out”

⁃ “i don’t think you’ve followed the train of logic all the way-“ “there’s a TRAIN INVOLVED????????”

⁃ “i’m like the orange fucker from that animated rom com”

⁃ “i’m under the influence of big cock”

⁃ “it’s meeee big cock man”

⁃ “i cant look away” “sam please use your twitter alt for this” “he’s horny on maaaainnnnn” “and what’s wrong with that?” “.......”

⁃ “you’re a FUCKING IDIOT” “IM NOT A FUCKING IDIOT, BIG COCK”

⁃ “i’m gonna call you ‘cockity’ big cock” “sHUT THE FUCK UP SHUT THE FUCK UP-“

⁃ “STOP LOOKING AT IT” “ITS SO VIBRANT”

⁃ “at least this guy doesn’t have a cock-“ “itS NOT A COCK” “horny on main jesus-“

⁃ “is that a cock” “SHUT THE FUCK UP”

⁃ “.....i wanna see the inside of it again do a split”

⁃ “okay sam-“ “tommy that guy wants your cock-“ “no- no he doesn’t sam”

⁃ “sam, sam and i need you to hear this....dont. act. up.” “i don’t act up-“ “you were acting up-“ “i-“ “you were caught in 8k.” “but- but we both agree it’s not a tie-“

⁃ “please don’t tell me to kill cockity i am overwhelmed”

⁃ “why is there an anus in my tie?”

⁃ “what are the legal implications of this?” “...i mean besides hell you’re good”

⁃ “whatre the legal implications?” “i mean usually that’s a no-no but today, today it’s fine” “yeahhh lets go murder his family”

⁃ “i’d be an antivax landlord”

⁃ “jesus never does drugs” “well- well you turned water into wine king and wine is alcohol”

⁃ “can you put on pants i can’t- i cant stop looking at it- sorry tommy i know you said-“ “yeah sam i know you tried-“

⁃ “you know i fuck with satan”

⁃ “i’m sorry jesus lucifer is just such a good man-“ “oh you- hold me BACK FROM THIS FUCKER HOLD ME BACK ILL SEND HIM TO HELL YOU LIKE HELL-“

⁃ “are you jesus or just a man who grew a beard and put on a suit?”

⁃ “even the guy with his cock out is telling you to stop-“ “oh jesus, and i mean jesus-“ “shUT THE FUCK UP MAN”

⁃ “the best best way to slander him is to stop his offspring; we need to kick him the balls.....no? not a good....? alright us four each take a ball-“

⁃ “......why did jesus give him four scrotums man🙁🙁”

[haytani]

BONTEN AS kny demons,,

—SPOILERS FOR THE KNY MANGA !!!

this is perhaps a little mean.

MIKEY & AKAZA — stuck on dead people that they can’t seem to forget or move past which results in a great deal of trauma that catches up to them eventually. both use hand to hand combat + they would NEVER hit a woman.

SANZU & ENMU — both creepy ass mfs literally anybody with common sense would run away the second these guys are in the radar. would 100% drug you just like the other one makes you sleepy sleep. both of them stink & kiss someone’s ass.

KAKUCHO & KOKUSHIBO — listen. listen, pain. it just makes sense. pain. both regret what they have become and yknow just like kokushibo has that flute kaku has izanas earring and ughhhaghahahshah enough.

RAN HAITANI & DOUMA — annoys the shit out of everybody. literally a smartass and a tease that never shuts the fuck up and wants to be involved in everything. thinks he’s the strongest but ain’t shit plus has women at his feet when he is a piece of shit but attractive nonetheless. HUGE RED FLAGS i’m talking BIG BOLD RED FLAGS. but also cute. they literally have the same smile for the love of god.

RINDOU HAITANI & HANTENGU (but as the angry rabid little guy not the old one) — would call someone a harlot without regrets. always with a face as if he was holding a shit. has a stick up his ass. a little bitch rabid dog who barks and bites ankles when he’s mad.

KOKONOI HAJIME & YUSHIRO — obsessed with a way older woman that literally pays 0 attention to him to the point that she just pities him. but like literally so obsessed and in love that even when she’s dead she can’t get a rest. always pissed off and tired of everybody.

TAKEOMI AKASHI & NAKIME — doesn’t even know how to fight. minds his business. king. sits around quietly and somehow knows everbodys business. yknow how she has that biwa that she plays well thats takeomi with his nicotine addiction.

MOCHIZUKI KANJI & KAIGAKU — yells and yells and yells and yells and bullies little kids bc he thinks he’s better than them when he truly isn’t and then gets his ass handed to him by somebody who is literally way smaller than him.

[idiotic-genius]

Hello!! I was wondering if you have any tips or advice for how to write a good "insanity" arc? A character I have goes through one and I want to do it right, yknow? If not that's ok, thank you if you do do one though :]

TW: Mentions of suicide, talking about mental illnesses and insanity

Thank you for the request, it's such an interesting topic! I found that there isn't that much information on it, but I'm glad to say that I'm pretty confident in what I did find. Anyways, let's get to it ^^

How to write an insanity arc

1. What is an insanity arc?

The first step to writing something is to understand it, so here is a quick definition that explains insanity itself, taken from Oxford Languages: "the state of being seriously mentally ill; madness/extreme foolishness or irrationality". Therefore, an insanity arc means that a character changes throughout the course of the story, descending into madness and irrationality. Sometimes, insanity is equated to certain mental illnesses such as schizophrenia, but personally, I wouldn't define it like that, at least not in fiction, because it could be confusing and also build harmful representation. To sum it up: An insanity arc means that the character slowly spirals into madness until they are mostly unrecognizable.

2. Symptoms of insanity (sorted by possible appearance)

Confusion/irritabbility

Extreme moods

Excessive fear or anxiety

Social withdrawal

Drastical change of eating and sleeping habits

Anger issues

Delusions/Hallucinations

Unability to cope

Suicidal thoughts

Denial

Physical problems

Substance abuse

3. What's the reason?

Insanity can be caused by heavy abuse, trauma, corruption, and also by experiencing mental illnesses that gravely impact the person's daily life (it has been discussed whether or not genetics have an impact as well, like in Alzheimers etc., but theory is yet to be proven). So, with all those overlapping symptoms, you can basically choose any reason for the insanity arc to happen, as long as you make it seem reasonable. Typical examples in fictions are:

Getting kidnapped by villains and corrupted

Turning against the system the character has originally chose to support because of betrayal

"Yandere-Symptom"

Something that could be hard about choosing a reason is the fact that as an author, you're probably trying to make your characters feel complex and realistic to the reader. So, if you haven't chosen why a character has an insanity arc, you should think about what would break them. Sometimes, the process of becoming insane is the arc itself, but, especially when it's not the main character experiencing the arc, sometimes it's about the process of noticing. In that case, maybe the character already went insane, but nobody knows yet and only slowly realizes because of the symptoms mentioned above, which means that the character could have a snap-scenario instead of a "slow burn". What's important is the knowledge of Where does the character start? and Where does the character end up? because the point of an arc is some kind of character development. It really depends on whether your character is going to end up broken and pale-skinned in a prison cell, happy as a psychopathic mafia boss or dead as the new "crazy" villain.

4. Writing from the character's perspective

Even though it could get tricky to only drop hints in the beginning that get more and more, it would probably be real fun to hide those little details and confusing the reader, because in the beginning they won't realize what's going on until they notice that they are the ones going insane with how they see the world, because they only viewed it from the character's eyes. Also, speaking as a reader, there is little greater than re-reading a story and finally noticing all the red flags and small hints, realizing Oh, that's what it means! One big advantage it has to write from the perspective of the character that goes insane is the illusion of clarity, especially when the character has been a reliable narrator so far. If the reader trusts their perspective, they can easily fall victim to believing anything they read without second thought. They might even think that the other characters are going insane! A huge aspect of insanity is a delusional view on the world, causing the symptoms mentioned earlier. The character will keep thinking that they are perfectly fine, or at least they'll be unsuspecting of what's to come. Their overreactions will seem normal, whereas the other characters could be portrayed as unbothered and therefore "weird". Their actions have to seem reasonable in their own mind, even though they do not follow moral codes. For example: An insane character would kill someone for being suspicious and "planning to murder them"- when they were really just trying to to some small talk.

5. Writing from someone else's perspective

If your to-be-insane character is not the main character, you will have to turn the whole thing explained in 4. around. The main character may notice all the symptoms from 2., but the question is: How do they deal with that and how do they react? Just from the symptoms, your character will probably not know what exactly is going on with the other, they might even suspect other mental illnesses, depending on what caused the beginning of the insanity arc. But there's probably going to be a moment of realization at some point. It could be because someone else tells your character "Hey by the way your friend's kinda insane" (unlikely), or, and this is what is more realistic, the insane character does something so out of the ordinary that the main character notices- whether that's an evil speech declaring war to all morals or them showing up by the villain's side fully depends on the story. In that case, the main character will only consciously notice the insanity arc when it has almost fully reached it's end. However, they will probably notice some things before that- like, to keep the example, the insane character being a lot more murderous than before.

6. Things an insane character might be doing (sorted by "heaviness")

Not getting social cues they used to get

Not understanding jokes

Reacting heavily to minor news

Feeling uncomfortable or annoyed around their friends

Binging/Having no appetite at all

Not liking the food they used to

Have depressed phases

Sleeping/being tired all the time or not sleeping at all

Developing insomnia

Getting overwhelmed by things they were fine with before

Getting angry easily and letting it out on other

Develop unhealthy coping mechanisms

Thinking more black-and-white

Ignoring obvious problems / their own mental state

Feeling nauseous, getting a migraine etc. all the time

Being paranoid and untrusting

Ignoring morals / only following their own

Not caring about consequences of illegal actions

Mad at system -> mad at individuals and vice versa

Find relief and happiness in their (sometimes) horrible and weird actions

That's it for this post! I hope this helps, and good luck writing your arcs and stories!

[imonthinice]

The Criminal Psychology Majors, Jason Todd x Fem!Reader Part 20/?

Word Count: 2.2k

Author’s Note: Y/N - your name

***IMPORTANT*** The Criminal Psychology majors will be taking a temporary hiatus as I’m getting my second dose of the vaccine today<3 I don’t know when I’ll be coming back because I don’t want to burn myself out on this series just to give content while I’m gone, yknow

Warnings: Swearing, Forgetfulness, No beta bitch we die like Jason Todd

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7) (Part 8) (Part 9) (Part 10) (Part 11) (Part 12) (Part 13) (Part 14) (Part 15) (Part 16) (Part 17) (Part 18) (Part 19) (Part 20)

They danced and sung the night away at the Gala. It ended at around 2:00am and everyone went back to the Wayne Manor. 

Somehow it came out that they should play Uno of all things. Uno is known for being the “Friendship Ruiner” or the “Relationship Ruiner” of the world. So, of course, they played it. Why wouldn't they?

Y/N dealt the cards. She was not quick about it. At all. She really struggled to deal the cards to the entire group, but she still tried. It was the thought that counted. Or at least she thought it did.

But no one seemed to mind she was a little slower with her cards-dealing. Which was different to the up-beat, face-paced life all of them lead. One would have expected that they would want a crazy fast dealer, but no one cared.

They played well into the night, with Jason ending up tapping-out and laying in Y/N’s lap. She played with his hair and leaned down to show him the good cards she got, at least until he fell asleep. She spent the time bonding with his family. 

They had always liked her. From the first time they all met her, they knew she was going to be something real. They were even impressed that Jason and her hadn’t fought yet. They were both hot-headed when they wanted to be, so when it was obvious that they put the relationship ahead of their own prides, it was something else.

They knew of the first time they had one of these moments. Y/N was at a dance competition, but Jason had to dip because of “Family Issues”, she was upset. Of course, she wanted him there and it looked like they were going to get into a huge spat about it. But, when she won that competition, she got up there and she said,

“This one is for my family, my friends, the extension of my family,” she paused, “And my boyfriend, Jason.” She smiled, “He isn’t here right now because of family issues, but he told me to follow my dreams, and here I am,” she said while raising her medal slightly, “This one was for you, baby.”

And that’s when his family knew that pride was stupid to them. Relationships are growing, changing together. And while they both stayed hot-headed, they changed that slight detail in themselves to be better partners. It was admirable.

Y/N ended up winning the last game. Half of the Waynes were sleeping, either at the coffee table where they were playing or in their rooms. She glanced over to the clock, 6:00am. She knew her parents were getting up soon, so she texted her mom,

Hey mum! So do you still want Jay and I to come over for the barbeque? 

And she nudged him a little. Everyone else had left the room, so she was trying to wake him up. So they could go to his room. He groaned.

“Baby, do you want to sleep in your bed?” she whisper-asked him, leaning down to his ear and stroking his hair. He groaned and got up, started walking to his room. She followed suit. He was on his bed and passed out before she even got up there.

She laughed and walked over to him, fumbling with his suit jacket. He mumbled something about taking him on a date first, and she laughed again.

“C’mon, work with me here, you’re going to be uncomfortable if you sleep in your suit, my love.”

He groaned and took off his jacket before unbuttoning his shirt, while she got his belt undone.

“God, take me on a date first,” he mumbled.

“Shh,” she said, placing a finger over his lips, “Just go to bed, Jay.”

He sloppily kissed her neck before she cupped his face and used her position to straddle him to the bed. She kissed his forehead before getting off of him and going through his clothes. She needed something, a shirt, pants, anything she could wear.

She fumbled with getting her own dress and gloves off, ending up throwing the dress over his desk chair, hoping it would minimize wrinkling. She undid her corset and threw it on his desk. Her heels were sitting at his desk chair. The gloves on his desk.

She crawled into bed with him, being the big spoon, burying her face behind his neck. She pulled out her phone to look at her texts. One from Artemis,

Hey, dude. That dress, oh my God?

She laughed into Jason’s shoulder and sent back,  I know. I know. I know. I killed it. You can’t say I didn’t.

You’re literally so right because again, oh my God. You did NOT need to wipe the floor with the rest of the guests. I mean, Selina was there and you were on her level.

That’s impressive. Selina is stunning. But I’d argue I was just below every Wayne lady.

Well, eventually you’ll be a Wayne lady.

C’mon. It’s been 6 months. 

You say that like the thought hasn’t crossed your mind at least once.

Yeah, but I don’t talk to anyone about it. 

You should start talking about it. Most people think about their weddings.

Okay, anyway. Why are you up so early?

I was studying most of the night with Wally.

Ah, “Studying”. Nice.

I wish! No, we were actually studying. Not like you and Jay at your little Gala. Actually had to study.

I have to study too, but exams are like next week.

Wish I could relate. Mine are today. 

And you didn’t sleep? Dude.

Shh, you’re not my mom.

She laughed and fell asleep cuddling Jason. Her phone was opened, so it died. 

----------------------------------

Jason woke up first. Looking at the time, it was 12:00pm. Y/N was sleeping behind him, still loosely holding him. He smiled. He hoped that the night before had fixed some of the issues between them. Well, he hoped there was no issues.

He didn’t want work to be more stressful than it already was. But, they were having issues. He thought it was because of finals, but he feared there was more to it. Maybe it was the fact that he’s famous. Maybe it was the fact that she couldn’t handle the fame. He hoped it wasn’t anything to do with the fame.

But the comment about the people with daggers at her throat obviously wasn't about anyone else. It was the press. He knew she had issues with the press. He always would. She always would.  He wouldn’t blame her if she walked away from him because of the press. Break up or a break, she was allowed to give up because of the press. He hoped she didn’t. He hoped she never would. He didn’t want to jinx them, but he really, really, hoped that this wouldn’t end in flames.

He looked at her. He remembered the first moment he knew he loved her. They were having dinner at this hole-in-the-wall restaurant that he had seen on patrol one night. She was scarfing down the food, and he wiped away the mess on her face with his thumb. He knew then. He knew in that moment that that was it. She was it. 

He was whipped and he knew it. But every time his siblings or dad brought it up, he mentioned current or past relationships they had. The only people who weren’t whipped in the Wayne household were the women.

Or maybe the all were, they were just good at hiding it. He turned around and cuddled her back He stroked her hair. He ran his fingers through her hair. 

She did it to him a lot. Physical affection was something that he was used to at this point. He still didn’t know how to feel about it, but he had ended up letting Dick hug him more often. He didn’t say it was because of her, because she didn’t outright run up to him expecting hugs, she was okay with hand holding and small touches of affection. It wasn’t because of her that he started letting people in.

But he did think she was a turning point for him. For his affection. His love style. She gave a damn about him and made it clear. It wasn’t like love he was used to, but it also opened his mind to people trying to love him.

She shifted around a bit. She ended up turning her back to Jason so he became the big spoon, and he buried his face in her hair. She groaned and tugged at the blanket on his bed, pulling it onto the two of them. He helped her get it on them. She groaned again.

“You up?” he whispered.

“No... I’m in deep sleep,” she said with a slur to her speech.

“My mistake, really.”

“It is.”

He pulled her closer, “Can you wake up?”

“No.”

“That’s sad. I wanted to talk.”

“You can talk.”

“Okay so,” he said, “I realised something. Some people would say you’re changing me, that I’m becoming someone else because of you,” he paused, “I’d have to disagree. You’re not doing anything.”

“Uh huh.”

“You’re just inspiring me to do better. You influence me. You don’t intentionally go in and change me, I change because I love you.”

“That’s nice honey.”

“You could pretend you’re interested in what I have to say, my love.”

“I’m tired, Jay.”

“I danced you to Hell, I guess.”

She groaned, “I guess I can’t go back to bed, now,” she flexed her wrist, “You’ve interrupted my sleep.”

He cuddled in closer to her, “I am not sorry.”

“Of course you’re not, why would you be?” she said while she turned to face him, “You just want to see me.”

“Damn, you got me.”

She yawned, “We need to study eventually.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“I just did.”

“School’s annoying. It’s on every last never but also none of them. It’s stressful but I also met you from it. It’s something I excel at but also causes me pain.”

“I know, babe. I know,” she said as she searched for her phone, finding it, dead and under her leg. “Fuck, killed my phone.”

“Where did you even have that all night?”

“Dress has pockets. But I didn’t bring my charger,” she sighed. “I had texted my mum too.”

“Texted your mom about what?”

“She wants us to go to a family barbeque after exams.”

“That’s so suburban of your family.”

“Yet they live in a massive city. I guess you'll see my family? you like them, don't you?” she asked. 

He had met her family in January of that year. He got along with her mom and dad, in spite of the language barrier between him and her dad. There was difficulty understanding each other, but they got along in their love for rock music. It warmed Y/N’s heart.

Her mom liked him just because he made her happy. They didn’t really need to get along, but they did. They both cooked, and her mom had dragged him into helping her when Y/N was watching figure skating with her dad. Apparently they hit it off.

“I have literally no idea,” he said.

“How do you not know?”

“Your sister has something off about her.”

“You know, that’s fair. I don’t blame you for that one.”

“Yeah, have you noticed she’s very... obsessed with vigilantes?”

“And you thought I was obsessed,” she joked, “Yeah, she takes it a little too far. The whole, “I want to marry a vigilante to infiltrate and kill them” thing was obviously a joke, but I feel like there was some truth to it. That scares me.”

“Thank God I’m not the only one.”

“If you don’t like her, don’t worry about it. i don’t care if you like her.  We’ve had  a difficult relationship all or lives. If you can be civil, it’s a win.”

“Did you have an ex openly hate your sister?”

“Yep. And he’s an ex for a reason.”

“That’s fair. I would hate it if someone openly hated one of my siblings.”

“Unless it’s Dami.”

“Unless it’s Dami, that’s very true.”

“Still don’t know what you have against that kid, he’s very sweet.”

“That’s what he wants you to think.”

“Well, then its working.”

“What a master manipulator,” he laughed. “It’s the principle of the matter, Y/N.”

“It’s the principle of the matter, Y/N,” she mocked.

“Okay listen,” he laughed, “It is. He’s a menace.”

“But you love him.”

“It’s unfortunate. He's my brother, but he is also whatever. I don’t know. He’s amazing, he’s a genius, but who knows. Maybe one day we won’t fight all the time.”

“Imaging hoping you don’t fight with your sibling.”

“Family issues, amirite?”

She groaned and got over him, “Where are you going?” he asked.

“Fuck, I don’t know. Just need to get up, to be fair.”

“Coffee?”

“Eh, probably not.”

“That’s new.”

“You betcha. I don’t feel the affects of caffeine withdrawal yet.” She looked at her dress, it was wrinkled. Which was whatever. She knew it was going to happen. She went searching for all her stuff and put it on his desk. It was spread all out over his room, she didn’t know how it happened.

“How did your shit end up everywhere?” he asked.

“Probably the same way that all your shit ended up everywhere? I have no idea.”

“What, did we fuck?”

“No!” she laughed, “Do you not remember?”

“Days are blurring together, so.”

“Well that’s not... normal?”

[whoslaurapalmer]

lulu watches doctor who; night terrors, the girl who waited ⚔️

no big deal but the girl who waited came into my house and murdered me in cold blood and i will never recover. oh my godddddd

-okay so i’m getting back to watching episodes closer together which i’m very happy about bc i feel like. having such a huge space between watching the past four episodes has made me, not keep all the characterization beats right in my head and like i’m going to miss something and not link things together right bc i’m not watching them as closely as i did for ten and i am very terrified of that!!!! -well! doing my best. anyway

-boy is it a gut punch that like. the first episode right after ‘amy has a child under very traumatic circumstances who is then taken from her, realizes this woman she knows is the grown up version of her daughter, and there’s no way she’s ever going to be able to actually raise her daughter in any way and has to just. keep going’ is ‘well it’s scared small child time!’ - :( -it doesn’t like. get brought up in the episode bc eleven is the one interacting with george and not amy but. i’m thinking it -especially bc claire not being able to have kids. is some rather big foreshadowing -that was also the moment in this episode where i was like ‘ohhhhhh this isn’t a child-pov horror. this is an adult-pov horror’ -it kind of wound up being both, though! -‘eleven’s overall series tone is a horror story’ marches on.........

-eleven and amy and rory all interviewing the residents is so cute omg look at them go

-that guy playing the dad looks like somebody. who is he. -oh he’s mr. young in gomens!!! knew he was familiar. good for him

-rory going ‘we’re dead. AGAIN!’ he’s getting savvy

-is anyone else absolutely dying for what the plot of ‘snow white and the seven keys to doomsday’ is -also i’ve been replaying link to the past with the seven princesses of heart maidens so. rotating link to the past and snow white around in my brain -it’s not my fault so many other games including kh did the ‘there are seven girls who are for plot du jour reasons magic-important and we’re gonna kidnap them and you have to go try and get them’ yknow -anyway. i’m imagining snow white with a sword going around and dungeon crawling castles and getting the keys to prevent doomsday and of course rescuing some princesses along the way

-the landlord getting turned into wood. was fucked up. a+ -the overall feel of this one was a little like fear her? (i really liked fear her, btw) even with the alien-ness of it all, the core of it is still a child’s fear of being hurt by a parent and those fears coming to physical life in some way, and being comforted by a parent that they’re loved and safe where they are and as they are. very different ways between episodes though but still 

-oh this is where the tick tock thing comes from! -the spirit of it is spooky. and like, yes, lake silencio is looming over us all as the end of the season approaches. but like. was it needed? ......eh??? -personally no i don’t think so because by god is the audience aware. maybe it makes more sense like. with a week in between episodes to keep the reminder but we did JUST see it again at the end of the previous episode so it’s not like. you’re gonna forget in a week. so i think it’s pushy  -but it’s not. terrible. i guess

-alright okay okay the girl who waited holy shit -just to get this out of the way first it was a smidge uncomfy with the quarantine talk in the existing state of 2022 but thankfully it did not last long -i love the white, though. very uncanny. very good

-it’s tough bc like. i don’t like the emphasis on amy saying ‘save me.’ on her having to wait. of accepting that she’d wait and not try and find a way out herself. on relying on someone to come get her, as an adult -on everybody writing amy into corners where she has to be rescued, honestly -but! by god this episode DELIVERS on even deconstructing that too

-because amy did wait. not just here. all the time. amy is always waiting for the doctor. she’s been waiting since she was just a little girl in a garden waiting for a friend to take her away to someplace new bc she was lonely. amy is always still that little girl in the garden, left behind and angry and bitey and covering it up -and she had to wait in demon’s run. and she had to wait for the doctor to find melody. and she always has to wait for the doctor to come get her, because of the doctor’s failures, she has to wait for the doctor to fix his mistakes that have put her in danger -and she gets tired of it!!! of course she does!!!! 36 years alone with some robots!! she knows time is passing differently but it still hurts. it’s still passing for her and she has to experience every second of it -so she does stop waiting. she has to. she has to fight bc amy is all amy has. and she gets angry and bitter! and fed up!!

-“and there he is. the voice of god.” -amy laying into the doctor. goddamn -that that’s what she calls him. that eleven is that. that he can be a god-like figure and also, he’s currently a disembodied voice out of rory’s glasses

-and that time MATTERS. because this is still amy. this is still our amy!! it is!!! 36 years later this is still our amy!!!! it’s not this amy and our amy it’s amy!!!!! and she doesn’t want that time and those years and what it meant to her, to be taken away. -“i will not help her.” do you help your past self? at the cost of your present and all you went through? -it’s terrible!!!! you should want to stop your suffering. because you could, you can, now. but all that you went through? all that made you this you, the now you, that’s still just as important as a younger you? that has as much value as younger you did, because this is still you? you lose that. it’s like it never happened, because it didn’t happen. like it can just be looked over, like all this hurt can just be wiped away when it’s you now

-ugggggg shit fuck i get it. okay. yeah alright i see the appeal of day of the doctor. i do -but it’s you. why wouldn’t you help you, if you could? if you had the opportunity to be that kind to yourself? -but there are some things you can’t, you know? there are some things you can’t change. some things can’t be stopped, some things can’t be erased, some things can only be moved forward from -where’s that tumblr comic where it’s like. if you could go back and stop yourself from doing a terrible thing. would you. because now you know better, because you learned what the consequences were. if you went back and stopped it and never learned, would you know better. would you still have the knowledge. do you go back and do you possibly become a lesser version of yourself. do you go forward and do better, be better -i don’t know, admittedly there’s a lot here -and it’s not like.........the time war is a true parallel to eleven’s complete lack of time management and amy suffering for it for her entire life, including 36 extra years that exist now -so like.......amy helping herself, is that amy helping herself or is it letting eleven off the hook? -of course they all remember everything, they saw older amy, they know it happened. no one’s really off the hook, honestly -when amy wakes up she wants to know where her older self is

-“time is rewritten.” “that’s good, isn’t it?” screeching. absolutely screeching

-i mean in terms of a tv show episode structure, of course they have to rewrite the older amy. like, to move forward in the show with both amys, or just older amy, that’s........a big ask. it’s a lot -what’s the best solution, here? for amy? -it is to rewrite time. it is to help your past self. -of course they wouldn’t be able to bring older amy along. of course not. -there’s a lot in here and i’m still not done unpacking it probably but i’m. tired of rolling it around

-anyway there’s also a lot to say about rory’s place in this, too -“are they happy?” “oh rory, trust you to think of that. i think they’re happy to be alive. better than the alternative.” -rory’s always thinking of other people and their happiness, and eleven is like........charmed and frustrated by it. bc it’s.......... -like in the pandorica opens/the big bang, eleven being charmed and exasperated by rory’s insistence on staying with amy. of course it’s something he’d do. rory is that kind -the doctor always does what’s right. these are things the doctor would do. but they are things the doctor is not doing.  they are things the doctor does differently. they are things that eleven, after ten, is seeing differently -eleven is very scared of being human like ten was, of allowing, obvious, overt emotion, of being too involved, there is always a distance between him and even the people he loves, even between him and amy (which i will briefly address at the end of this post) (but also a possessiveness, too. also a selfishness) -but he’s also.........he’s got it in the other direction too. he doesn’t want to get too close and he wants to protect them and it’s turned eleven a little, cruel.

-rory is a better being than the doctor. -and christ almighty they fucking did it. was i not literally just wondering if they were doing ‘is rory being made into a doctor. is rory better.’ -“this isn’t fair. you’re turning me into you.” - :(((((((((((((((((((( -that’s one of those heartbreaking lines that’s always going to stick with me -many companions wind up turning into shades of the doctor. (at all times i am never over everybody threatening genocide in journey’s end and ten going ‘oh shit’) but not in a way they’re always.........consciously aware of -but rory is!! and this isn’t the first time rory’s called eleven out for it, he did it in venice too -but he even defends the doctor, too. rory is not immune. “the doctor just got the timing a bit off.”

-anyway rory having to let go of older amy, older amy telling him not to let her in. yep that hurt

-i do like seeing rory being so important to amy. like. actually seeing them matter to each other -waiting for rory is..........unlike waiting for the doctor. because rory means something different to amy than the doctor does. i don’t really have any big thoughts here -i can say that i feel like amy revolves too much around the doctor but it’s really that way for every companion so i’m just. throwing my hands up at this point i guess idk -i think she specifically is defined by her relationship to the doctor, and to rory, in a way that is.........very present in this episode in a good way and a bad way but again. literally every female companion is to some extent defined by her relationship to the doctor, in some way, but amy isn’t shown pieces of a life that exist without them, like other companions and their families, but i’m still, throwing my hands up right now

-oh, shit. i’m gonna have to watch pond life, aren’t i

-anyway, additional observations --

-amy’s phone by the dvds.......what dvds do they watch.........inquiring minds want to know who picks the movies on tardis movie night (-it has to be amy.)

-hey remember when sarah jane got stuck behind a door and separated from four and male companion du jour. (oh that’s very specific. I KNOW WHAT I’M REMEMBERING) what was that, ark in space??

-a+ for eleven in glasses. a+ for rory in glasses. i love a good glasses

-amy: i named the robot rory me: wow, amy wilson’d a hand bot

-the doctor is a coop vs AMY GOT STUCK IN THE BLACK LODGE -THIS IS A LODGE. THIS IS A L O D G E -there was a venus statue and we’ve got one predominate color and a person stuck there with themselves and sort-of doppelganger robots for years, and years, and years -i don’t know what to do with this information or where to go with it but that was a lodge.

-at all times i am rolling the master around in my head like a sad little convenience store hot dog so of course i was thinking ‘simm!master makes the tardis into a paradox machine’ vs ‘eleven willingly causes a paradox so that he can save amy’ -it is a SIN that eleven never got to interact with a master. an absolute shame. a gross injustice.

-yeah there is again a very sharp cruelness in eleven lately -how he handled amy’s ganger, destroying the cybermen to make a point, shutting the door on older!amy (and the emphasis on this amy and our amy) -yes i also think there’s been like. a very forced distance between eleven and amy, in particular, very recently in these episodes, like eleven is forcing himself to not get too close to her, asking rory for permission to hug her -eleven really is PAINFULLY AWARE of what has happened to amy is all his fault, amy even CALLED HIM OUT ON IT and how can you let go of the people you love but how can you keep hurting them? yeah i got into this up there -but yeah! how can he still let them go? what’s the alternative? you don’t hurt anybody but you’re alone. (-oh, that is coming for eleven though, isn’t it. my vague sense of ‘i am aware of pieces of eleven’s shenanigans but not everything’ is tingling)

-anyway god complex is next and boy howdy. am i excited

[soldsmoke]

genuinely not sure i'm neurodivergent. like if i’ve been ‘pretending’ or ‘hiding’ parts of myself my whole life how do i know thats not something ‘normal’ people do? yknow what i mean? i feel like i could have adhd and lately ive noticed things i could attribute as rejection sensitivity but also this could all be a huge assumption on my part. and i’m also not sure if anything i experience is a) severe enough or b) it is and i’m downplaying it or c) i’m misinterpreting one thing as something else

i also dont know if knowing what’s wrong would help, like obviously context yeah but i experience depression and anxiety and am currently dealing (trying to) with life-long tauma. idk how knowing more things are amiss would help?

theres clear neurodivergency within my immediate family and i already feel stupid for taking 20 years to realise it might affect me too. i originally thought ‘if it bothers other people enough then they’ll tell me :)’ which is stupid and obviously didnt play out given my family’s dynamic lmao

the more i write out these things out the more it feels like the answer should be obvious, but it just isn’t. taking into account the fact i have trouble putting myself first/not considering my own needs/boundries that should mean i should trust my gut more BUT also i have terrible doubts and dont want to... i dont know... be wrong??? idek if thats a thing, i already feel guilt over ‘not being depressed enough’ which is fucking stupid i realise this.

anyway- i should bring this up to a health professional, i guess thats the next step but my confidence fucking tanks around my own stuggles and problems, and again, idk if knowing would help, idk if anything is severe/even worth worrying about.

i wrote this out just bc i’ve kinda hated the space its taking up in my brain for the past few years n honestly i just want some peace from it orz