#which is very true and real advice in some cases

[pinnithin]

im very compelled by the role memory loss plays in shadowheart's story, not only for the narrative flow of learning more about her alongside shadowheart herself, but also by the way its shaped her as a person, because how do you develop a personality when you so frequently cant remember who you are?

the trip back to the house of grief reveals that shadowheart's mission to retrieve the astral prism is far from the first time she's had memories removed. her past as a selunite, incidents throughout her sharran training, atrocities she's committed, the associated feelings of guilt and pain and loss - they've all been removed. several times over, in some cases, such as when she remembers her parents while in the process of torturing them.

but as in most cases with trauma and memory loss, she may not be able to remember what happened, but she remembers how it made her feel, and so she's learned to listen when her brain is giving her alarm bells. without anything concrete to make her decisions off of, she's built her identity around caution and heeding that inner voice when her instincts are trying to tell her something.

she wants to place her faith in shar. as far as facts go, serving her goddess is all she has to work with. its a comforting constant when her memory is so spotty and unreliable. but when she finds herself in situations where she should feel convicted in her actions but every instinct is telling her otherwise, her faith can't help but waver because she's learned over the years that her instincts can't be ignored.

she doesn't remember details, but she's skeptical and pragmatic enough not to just believe anything anyone tells her. she trusts her gut and sticks to her principles because that's all she has. and unfortunately for shar, its hard to brainwash someone into blindly following her faith when that person is a skeptic by default. especially when the methods shar uses to control people have only cemented shadowheart's tendency to question everything.

she trusts shar, yes, but she trusts herself more, and that's what ruins the plan to sacrifice the nightsong in the shadowfell, and i see that as a major factor in why shadowheart throws away the spear of the night. (i imagine viconia sees this coming, which could be why she sent her on the suicide mission for the prism to begin with) not necessarily because of anything alyn told her, but because it feels wrong. and when things feel wrong she's learned to listen.

idk i just find her so complex and interesting. here's a character who is so driven by very objective and practical standpoints but can only really trust her feelings because the part of her mind that's supposed to draw conclusions from fact is just lacking the necessary information she needs to make decisions. its a compelling mingling of character traits.

[drdemonprince]

also like. The way that some discoursers describe the role of a "power differential" in an age gap relationship is heavily informed by cishet relationship expectations that frame a romantic relationship as adversarial.

Just saw someone in the comments of a post about age gaps discussing how confusing it can be to determine who in a relationship actually has the "upper hand," once you take into account factors like income, immigration status, race, and so on. True enough facts, but also -- why are we discussing relationships in terms of who has the upper hand? How will that upper hand be utilized and what does it mean to actually be in a loving relationship with another person when that is how you approach how you relate to one another?

Liberal feminist dating advice for cishet women in particular leads them to become obsessed with not losing the "upper hand" over the men that they are dating -- to not show too much affection or genuine interest, to not forgive mistakes lest you become weak, to not become dependent upon a partner, to remain economically empowered and so on.

Again, these are very sensible attempts to balwark oneself against systemic sexism in the patriarchy, I'm not blaming women for often needing to do all of that.

But can you actually be in a mutually supportive, interdependent relationship if you are constantly guarding yourself against losing your position? Is it loving, is it nourishing, is it a real relationship if you must always guard yourself against losing the "upper hand"?

Patriarchal laws and policies and the awful conduct of many men obviously makes this kind of thinking adaptive for many, but it is horrible that cishet women feel that they can never be vulnerable around the people that they love. That is not a state of affairs we should consider acceptable or admirable; that kind of thinking is not a solution to the real issue at hand, which in this case is systemic sexism, but in other cases could be ageism, classism, what have you.

we need to remove the existing power differentials in a structural way so that people are free to love others how they want to, and not constantly guard themselves against those they love. But even in the meantime, viewing a single interpersonal relationship as the battleground in which these systemic forces play out is a bit confused.

Telling individual people who are marginalized that they must be mindful of the "power differential" when electing whom to date is a bit like telling women they shouldn't "let" themselves be assaulted by wearing the wrong item of clothing or hanging out in the wrong places. That is not why abuse happens. It is not in the marginalized person's control. And instructing marginalized people to avoid receiving love and support as means of protecting themselves only leaves them far more vulnerable in a lot of cases.

[chocolatepot]

Hi! Can you elaborate on "Fuck GRRM's committment to 'historical realism' without knowing anything about medieval social history"? I would love to know about what GRRM gets wrong about medieval gender roles, specifically.

So Cersei learns at an early age that she has no agency, her only value is producing heirs and is barred from traditional routes of power so she has to use underhanded methods such as influencing men with sex or using underhanded magical means. I would love an explanation on why this doesn't reflect medieval queen consorts and noble women irl.

Sure! The basic summary is: GRRM "knows" the things that everyone "knows" about the middle ages, which are broad stereotypes often reflective of a) primary sources that deserve a critical reading rather than being taken at face value and b) the judgements of later periods making themselves look better at the medieval period's expense.

As Shiloh Carroll argues, building on the work of Helen Young, “readers are caught in a ‘feedback loop’ in which Martin’s work helps to create a neomedieval idea of the Middle Ages, which then becomes their idea of what the Middle Ages ‘really’ looked like, which is then used to defend Martin’s work as ‘realistic’ because it matches their idea of the real Middle Ages.”

Since you're mainly interested in Cersei here, I'd strongly recommend a book: Queenship and the Women of Westeros: Female Agency and Advice in Game of Thrones and A Song of Ice and Fire, edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz. It's an excellent read and speaks to exactly what you're asking about. The tone of the book is very positive and non-judgemental when it comes to GRRM and his depictions of women on the whole, but I think some of this is rhetorical positioning to not seem like "mean angry academics jumping on fiction for not being accurate," as the actual content turns the reader to thinking about how much agency and power medieval queens had in different European societies and how little of that worked its way into GRRM's worldbuilding.

It's true that women typically didn't inherit titles and thrones in their own right, and that they were usually given in marriage for political/dynastic reasons. However, they weren't seen as brood mares whose only duty was to pop out sons: both queens and noblewomen had roles to play as household managers, counselors, and lieutenants, actively participating in the ruling of their domains and in local and international diplomacy (women in political alliances were not just pawns sent to a powerful man's bed, but were to act as ambassadors for their families and to pass information back and forth), and they had to be raised with an understanding of this so that they could learn to do it. Motherhood was very important, don't get me wrong, but it's a mistake to assume as pop culture does that a wife's foremost duty being to provide heirs for her family meant that she was ONLY seen as a mother/potential mother.

Catelyn is a great example of what was expected of women in these positions. But in the books, Catelyn is basically the only woman who inhabits this role, and the impression given is that she's exceptional, that she's just in charge of the household because she's so great at it that Ned allows her to be his partner, and that he listens to her advice because she happens to be a wise person in his orbit - and also that Ned is exceptional for giving so much power to a woman, because in the world of ASOIAF, it takes an especially good man to do this. In GRRM's view of the medieval world, realpolitik and the accumulation of power are the most important things, so men in Westeros are extremely unlikely to give up any authority to their wives, even though this is historically inaccurate.

Cersei, on the other hand, is supposed to be a more realistic depiction of what would happen to an ambitious medieval woman. There's a chapter titled "Queen of Sad Mischance: Medievalism, “Realism,” and the Case of Cersei Lannister" in the book I've rec'd, and it deals with why this is problematic extremely well. (This is the source of the quote at the top of this post.) In it, Kavita Mudan Finn argues that Cersei embodies pretty much every medieval trope for the illegitimate wielding of power by a woman. She underhandedly gets people killed for opposing her, she seduces men into doing her bidding, she advances her family's interests and her own at the expense of the realm. She's made sympathetic through fannish interpretation and Lena Headey's performance, but in the text she's an evil woman doing evil things. Even when she gets to be regent for her son - a completely legitimate historical position that allowed women to handle the levers of power almost exactly like a king - she continues to do shitty things and not be taken seriously because she's just not good at ruling.

But even before then, from a medieval perspective she had access to completely legitimate power that she didn't use: she'd have had estates giving her a large personal income, religious establishments to patronize (giving her a good reputation as a pious woman and people she'd put in high positions being personally loyal to her), artists and writers to patronize as well, power over her household, men around her listening to her counsel. That she doesn't have that is a reflection of GRRM either deciding these things don't really exist in Westeros in order to make it a worse world than medieval Europe and justify Cersei feeling she had to use underhanded means of power, or not knowing that they were ordinary and unexceptional because he has a good working knowledge of the politics of the Wars of the Roses but little to no knowledge of social history beyond pop culture osmosis, and, imo, little to no interest in actual power dynamics.

There are a lot of books I'd recommend on this subject. There's a series from Palgrave Macmillan called "Queenship and Power" and nearly all the books in it are THE BEST. Theresa Earenfight's Queenship in Medieval Europe is a very readable introduction to the situations of queens in European societies across the continent. She also has a book, Women and Wealth in Late Medieval Europe, that also addresses non-royal women's power. I'm also a huge fan of English Aristocratic Women, 1450-1550: Marriage and Family, Property and Careers, by Barbara Harris, which really emphasizes the "career" aspect of women's lives as administrators and diplomats.

[skaruresonic]

The common rebuttal to "this reads like fanfic (derogatory)" is "read better fanfic," which is true in certain cases, but on the other hand, there is some grain of truth to the idea that you can tell when someone's primary mode of literary analysis is fanfic instead of... well... literally anything else. It's okay to like or even prefer fanfic, but if you want to take your craft seriously you also need to read books, dude. Published books will teach you a lot of stuff fanfic doesn't, like proper dialogue formatting and how to introduce your reader to unfamiliar characters. Even the crappiest book (well, if it's not After or 50 Shades, which started off as fanfic to begin with lol) will have been subjected to some sort of editing process to ensure at least the appearance of proper grammar. That's not a guarantee with your average fanfic, and hence why you can't always take all your writing cues from fanfic because it's "so much better" than commercially published original fiction or whatever. Frankly, fic writers tend to peddle some absolutist and downright bad takes sometimes. "Said is dead" is a terrible rule, though not because said is invisible and a perfectly serviceable tag; that's just part of it. Dialogue tags are a garnish, not a main dish that can be swapped out for more ostentatious words. If your characters murmur and mutter instead of simply saying stuff, your readers are going to wonder why nobody speaks up. "'I'm explaining some very plot-important shit right now lol,' she elaborated," likewise, is a form of telling. Instead of letting the reader extrapolate that "she elaborated" via the contents of the dialogue itself, you're telling them what to think about it. And that's why it's distracting: your authorial hand is showing. Writing is an act of camouflage. You, as the writer, need to make your presence as invisible as possible so as to not intrude on the reader's suspension of disbelief. That's the driving reason behind "show, don't tell." And overall, everyone could stand to cut down on the frequency of their dialogue tags anyway. Not every exchange needs "he said" or "she whispered" attached as long as you establish who is doing the talking before the exchange. Some people will complain of confusion if you go on for too long without a dialogue tag, and that definitely is a risk, but at some point you also need to resist the temptation of holding the reader's hand. If they can't follow a conversation between two people, chances are they weren't meeting you halfway and paying that much attention in the first place. In fact, you don't even necessarily need action beats in between every piece of dialogue, as Tumblr writing advice posts will often suggest as a fix. Pruning things often cleans them up just fine.

Another fanfic-influenced trend in writing is, I guess, beige prose? A heavy focus on internal narration with lots of telling. It's not a style I can concretely describe, but every time I click on a non-mutual's writing, I feel like it always has, like. This "samey" voice to it. There's no real attempt to experiment and use unique or provocative language, or even imagery half the time. It's almost a dry recital of narration that doesn't leave much room for subtext. I see this style most often in fanfic where you can meander and wax poetic about how the characters feel without ever really getting around to the plot. And it's like. DO something.

Other tells that the author is taking their cues from fanfic mores rather than books: >>too much minute description of eyes, especially their color and their movement >>doesn't leave much room for subtext (has a character speak their every thought aloud instead of letting the reader infer what they're thinking via action or implication) >>too much stage action ("X looked at Y. Y moved to push their seat in. X took a deep breath and stepped toward Y with a determined look on his face. 'We need to talk,' he said.") >>tells instead of shows, even when the example is about showing instead of telling ("he clenched his teeth in agony" instead of just "he clenched his teeth") >>has improper dialogue tag formatting, especially with putting full stops where there should be commas ("'Lol and lmao.' she said" instead of "'Lol and lmao,' she said." This one drives me up a wall) >>uses too many dialogue tags >>"em dashes, semi-colons and commas, my beloved" - I get the appeal but full stops are your friends. Too much alternate punctuation makes your writing seem stilted and choppy. >>"he's all tousled brown hair and hard muscle" and "she's all smiles and long legs." This turn of phrase is so cliche, it drives me up a wall. Find less trite ways of describing your characters pls. >>"X released a breath he didn't know he'd been holding" >>every fucking Hot Guy ever is described as lean and sinewy >>sobbing. why is everyone sobbing. some restraint, pls >>Tumblr in general tends to think a truism counts as good writing if you make the most melodramatic statement possible (bonus: if it's written in a faux-archaic way), garnish it with a hint of egotism, and toss in allusions to the Christian God, afterlife, or death. ("I will stare God in the face and walk backwards into hell," "What is a god to a nonbeliever?") It's indicative of emotional immaturity imo, that every emotional truth need be expressed That Intensely in order to resonate with people. >>pushes the "Oh." moment as the pinnacle of Romantic Epiphany >>Therapy Speak dialogue. why is this emotionally constipated forty-something man who drinks himself stupid every morning to escape gruesome war memories speaking about his trauma like a clinical psychologist >>"this well-established kuudere should Show More Emoshun. I want him to break down crying on his love interest's shoulder from all his repressed trauma" - I am begging u. stop >>"why don't the characters just talk to each other?" "why can't we have healthy relationships?" I don't know, maybe because fiction is not supposed to be a model for reality and perfect communication makes for boring drama?

>>improperly using actions as dialogue tags ("'Looks like we're going hunting,' he grinned") >>why is everyone muttering and murmuring. speak up >>too many adverbs, especially "weakly" and "shakily." use stronger verbs. ("trembled" instead of "shook weakly") >>too many epithets ("the younger man" or "the brunette detective") >>too many filter words ("he felt," "she thought," "I remembered")

>>no, Tumblr, first-person POV is not the devil; you're just using way too many filter words (see above) and not enough sentence variation to make it flow well enough. First-person POV is an actually pretty good POV (not just for unreliable and self-aware narrators) if you know what you're doing and a lot of fun crafting an engaging character voice. Tumblr's hatred of first-person baffles me, and all I can think is you would only hate it if your only frame of reference was, like, My Immortal. Have you tried reading A Book? First-person POV is just another tool in your toolbox, and like all tools, it can be used properly or improperly. But it's not inherently a marker of bad writing. The disdain surrounding it strikes me as about as sensical as making fun of the concept of characters. Oh, your work has characters in it? Ew, I automatically click off a fic if it has characters in it. like what.

[deusvervewrites]

The First Line

A lot of people out there will tell you that the first line of a novel is the most important. I've seen the wisdom that the first line must grab the readers attention, be some kind of a "hook" to draw them in deeper, or to tonally reflect the main themes. That the first line needs to throw the reader into the thick of it!

But how true is that really? It's been nagging me for a while now as someone who has started more fics than I've completed.

Out of curiosity, I grabbed a handful of my favorite novels and compiled their first lines.

"There are many legends about my mother." Daughter of the Moon Goddess, Sue Lynn Tan

This line doesn't really establish much about the plot of this book. Not the narrator's name, goal, conflict, or even the setting. We can make some inferences from the existence of legends around someone, but 'legendary' only narrows anything down because of the book's title. It is, however, indicative of the narration style and the novel's prose.

"Mary Jekyll stared down at her mother's coffin." The Strange Case of the Alchemist's Daughter, Theodora Cross

This line puts us right into a scene. Some real In Medias Res. Except... it's not really an action scene. It's a somber affair. And from Mary's staring, it's safe to say she has some heavy thoughts on the matter.

We can also make some assumptions from the wording choice. Looking down at the coffin suggests that she is standing over it, so we know at once this takes place during the funeral.

Interestingly--and I'm going to break my soft rule of not addressing the rest of the text here--this line does not allude to the novel's framing device.

"The temperature of the room dropped fast." Bartimaeus: The Amulet of Samarkand, Jonathan Stroud

This is another opening that's setting a scene instead of trying to introduce us to the cast or conflict, or even to the setting. Why is it getting colder? We can infer from the fact that the temperature is dropping fast that this probably isn't a good thing or at least not a normal thing.

"I've seen Steelheart bleed." Steelheart, Brandon Sanderson

This line fascinates me. It says a lot and, at the same time, very little. We know that someone named Steelheart exists, obviously. However, the narrator is giving gravitas to the sight of them bleeding. So we've already learned that Steelheart doesn't bleed very often, and seeing it was worth remembering. But who Steelheart is and why the narrator cares? Nothing in this line indicates that.

"Kendra stared out the side window of the SUV, watching foliage blur past." Fablehaven, Brandon Mull

I think this is the most relatable opening line I have listed here, since I can instantly in my mind picture the expression on Kendra's face knowing nothing else about her, or where she's going. We can guess she's probably not happy to be going there since she's staring out the window with what I would assume to be boredom. That's some conflict there. But, like, extremely minor conflict.

"The tired old carriage, pulled by two tired old horses, rumbled onto the wharf, its creaky wheels bumpety-bumping on the uneven planks, waking Peter from his restless slumber." Peter and the Starcatchers, Dave Barry and Ridley Pearson

Well this sentence rambled on a bit didn't it? But it's very evocative. It tells us very little about the story (beyond Peter's name) but it sets the scene beautifully. Not only is it evocative of the scenery, but the time period (from the horse-drawn carriage) and the tone as well. We also know that Peter wasn't sleeping very well, which indicates that he's either anxious about something or that sleeping in this carriage wasn't very easy. Or both.

"In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit." J.R.R. Tolkien, The Hobbit

This is the kind of line that would get me murdered by a lot of writing advice that I've seen over the years. This line tells you next to nothing, not even whether or not its weird for hobbits to live in holes. What this line does do is ease us into the narration style that Tolkien employs, which is generally slow and descriptive.

Okay...?

So what was the point of all of that?

Well, this experiment has solidified my opinion on something. As I said, I've been having thoughts about opening lines, but I think that the actual first line of the book is not as important as the first scene of the book. None of these lines out of context are that good. Sure, The Hobbit is iconic, but that's not because that line itself is phenomenal. It's practically "Once Upon A Time."

But it works for the scene.

The first scene is far more interesting to me than the first line. I'm not so impatient that if the first line fails to captivate me I'll toss the book aside. And I know that's true for other people because H. Bomberguy posted a four-hour video on plagiarism and we all watched it.

What this means, I think, is that we don't need to treat our audience as if we're in an arms race against their dwindling attention spans as if we'll lose them forever to TikTok if the first sentence isn't the pinnacle of literature.

People will give a work a chance. That's what the summary is for; to tell people if they'll like it so they can know to give it a try.

If you were afraid to write, or to share your writing, because you didn't think the first line was good enough... I don't think that matters. I think that people won't hate it. Won't turn up their noses in disgust.

[darqx]

Nope!

I like that I've had people say they can relate to my characs and/or that my characs feel real 🥰 That really makes my day cos it means I'm doing ok with my characteristation then haha. In terms of Rire in particular, one of my fave things is when people can't decide whether they like him or hate him and end up settling on a weird mixture of both and squaggling about it. I find this extremely gratifying.

Hello! Thanks I am doing good (now that I'm having a break from work ahah) :D I'm gonna be real and say I'm not sure if I'm the best person to ask considering I was only involved in like...one and a bit horrorporn projects |D - Gato would prob be the MVP at the moment - but I'll give you some gen advice that hopefully you can find useful :)

Plan your project. Most people are NOT good pantsers and it's not easy to get a cohesive plot/project if you don't have SOME idea of what you are doing. Whether you are doing a VN or a comic or whatever, make sure you have an outline of what is going to happen for your own reference.

Find an audience. If you're lucky then an audience who will enjoy your project will find you (which was the case with BTD and some throwing it out there.) Most of the time though you will need to advertise your project to like-minded people first. Put your characters, art, teasers out there! If you want people to care about your project you have to give them a reason to care about/get excited about it.

Be prepared to be disliked. This is true for any project because everyone doesn't like everything, but if you are going for horrorporn (or really, anything that could be considered weird i guess) there's a much higher chance of people looking at your stuff and going what the ever loving fuck. Anyway the point is you will need to just do your own thing and try not take certain things personally even if they seem aimed at you personally. Or just be like:

4. ✔️ Just do it. Self explanatory, dont let your dreams be dreams lol.

Thanks very much for asking first! I'm flattered that you want to create fangames like that with my BP characs, but I'm unfortunately going to have to say no at the moment. This is mainly because I haven't got my own project with them out yet and I don't want people to potentially get confused with the origins. Maybe after I start posting and establish the comic more, we can revisit this question :)

Thank you (and to all the other lovely asks like this)! Psh don't worry about being new to being an artist, everyone has to start somewhere!

[yannaryartside]

the payoff for this love triangle shit better be good

a Sydcarmy vs Claircarmy rant

So, to ramble here, I am starting to wonder what place romance has in the overall plot of The Bear as a show and, by that, what function it will execute. I am going to write about some alternatives that I can predict.

The overall purpose of the show is to heal Carmy, or to put Carmy on a path when self-healing is the only option. He is a sinking ship that has been treating his holes with tape instead of acknowledging the "bear" trauma. At the present of the show, the bear is still in a cage.

So, what paths of healing romance could offer Carmy? Love and loving others is essential to learning to be better versions of ourselves and achieve happiness.

Option one: ClaireCarmy

Yeah, we are here again. Stick with me after the next paragraph so I can dispute what I am about to write.

I must admit, if I take the most superficial parts of the show's structure so far, Claircarmy seems to be the clear endgame. What we are seeing with them could be categorized in one of the most used tropes in romance: the "I am not good enough to receive love" trope, in which a character is afraid of being loved, so they push away the romantic interest until they heal their wound, they make a love confession, and they get back together. I know a movie/show came to mind. We have seen it a dozen times. Even what Claire told Tiff "If something good happens to him, he would blame me." We see Carmy thinking about her and missing the relationship they had. He even declares her as his peace. It would make sense that this is a story about a girl who wanted to love a boy and a boy who was too wounded to accept that love. It would make a clean ending for Carmy to go to therapy, learn to accept love, and reconcile with Claire, who has all the attributes of someone who would fall in love with a broken person.

The grenades are in the way.

NOW, the show has been planting grenades for option one to feel like "the right one" even if our protagonist seems to think it is the case. There are Claire's obvious red flags of course, behavior that looks naive but has some manipulative undertones. The fact that she is written like a woman with no personality, or at least no personality outside helping people in pain (Carmy included). She still talks about her patients as subjects, and there is a theory in the sydcarmy fandom that she may feel powerful or valued only in a position of taking care of people who cannot fend for themselves. There is also the fact that she is not a good doctor (she almost killed a patient over a very preventable mistake). Her comments of setting things on fire being cool while Carmy is afraid of setting himself on fire is still, for me, the biggest red flag.

My theory is that Storer just didn't want to show people with depression to accept love but to be wary of the love we accept while we are still stuck in our old ways of thinking. It is true that even at your worst, you may find yourself in relationships that keep you that way, but the relationships may feel good, so we have a hard time moving away from them. If that is the case, Storer, I promise to never commit blasphemy on your church.

The SydCarmy option.

I am not going to repeat myself. They read each other's minds. They can actually give each other real advice and support (While Carmy kissed Claire after she admitted malpractice). They make each other better, while Claire keeps Carmy as broken as he is (never apologize, you can pretend to be someone else at a party).

Sydney brings him actual peace and self-understanding. It is actually very important to me that they made Sydney say she has difficulty keeping with Carmy at his worst because she is not a mind reader. But at this point, there is no doubt in my mind that she has feelings for Carmy, or that she at least has felt the sparkles of what it would be love in the future.

The payoff.

I swear to god, the next season better provide clarity on all of this because, at this point, it is too much. There is no way you give so many clues in the background for one ship and pursue the other in the front.

My worst fear, which is actually really possible, is that the show wants to concentrate on the "being stuck in the past" narrative so that all the elements for the future are there, but we won't act on them until the end of it. So Carmy can kill all his bad habits, the self-isolation, aggressiveness, depression, self-harming tendencies (fire), and Claire, and THEN, he can open his heart to Sydney. It is obviously not what many of us want to see; maybe this was never a love story, but an "unstuck yourself from the mud" story.

I wish the progress of the love story you actually want to tell (Sydcarmy) would progress with the show's actual plot (Carmy's mental health) a little more. Otherwise, the payoff is never going to feel quite like one. You may have done too much of a good job misguiding your audience, and then it will feel like a change of direction, like a plot twist at the end of a mystery novel, but that rarely works in romance subplots.

I know the clues were there, but your narrative seems to ignore them so far, making it feel more like gaslighting.

Anyhow, thank you for hearing me ramble.

[celaenaeiln]

What's the deal with fanon Tim bc I read some comics with Tim and I've seen him in cartoons but all I see people talk about is "haha coffee addicted nerd who doesn't sleep!" and that just seems weird and wrong. Like my view of Tim has always been "he's a nice and extremely smart guy who sometimes pushes things a bit too far and maybe a bit set in his own ways/Batman's ways" but now I'm not even sure of that because I really haven't read THAT much (mostly seen him in other series) lol

No you're right!! Anon you're so right!!!

What the heck is up with fanon Tim Drake??

The thing about him not sleeping is actually true though

Detective Comics (2016) Issue #937

Batman: Contagion Issue #11

(I agree with Catwoman, Tim is so cute)

So I understand where the coffee addiction in fanon comes from but Tim's not actually addicted to coffee in the comics. I actually don't recall him mentioning coffee at all. At some point he might have but if he did, then those instances are so little in the grand scheme of things it might as well be called negligible if it's trying to be called an addiction.

But more importantly, Tim is so much more than that!! My favorite Tim Drake aspect of him is how sassy and sarcastic he is, it makes him so endearing!!

UGH NO ONE APPRECIATES HOW MUCH OF A LITTLE SHIT HE IS!!

Robin (1993) Issue #58

CMON CMON CMON LETS TALK MORE ABOUT THIS!!

Tim, you little shit, you know exactly what they say - cause you did it!!

HIS SELF-SATISFIED SMILE!!!

In all honesty I find Tim the funniest of the entire batfamily to read because he's so-he's so wholesomely quirky in a mean way. That's such as awkward way to describe it but reading his comics, you just can't get enough of them because he's just too funny!

At one point he has a massive fever and stuck underground with a bunch of weird kids and one of the girls is just like "please get better, please get some rest!" as she's wiping away his sweat and Tim has like no breath or energy at this point. But with the last remains of will power, he uses his breath to push one last question between lips.

Robin (1993) Issue #70

And as the audience waits in baited anticipation we get this-

Robin (1993) Issue #70

It's actually a very valid question and shows his detective thinking and yada yada yada but THE COMEDIC GOLD OF HIS TIMING!!

Like his situation and his question there's a massive gap that's almost incomprehensible about it all which is why it's so fantastic!!

The way he sasses batman is top 5 fav moments with him.

Azrael: Agent of the Bat Issue #91

Thanks @paladin-of-nerd-fandom65 for finding it again <33

But Tim overall is just like a normal kid. He's what authors tried to do with Stephanie but failed. They were able to make him relatable to the audience because the way he acts, it's so quirky but funny. Yes, he's a boy detective genius but he likes messing with people, he likes solving crime, he likes hanging out with his big brother, he asks for relationship advice, he can get insecure, he can get upset without acting cold, he gets tired, he gets anxious, he's determined, and he's super dorky.

Robin (1993) Issue #25

Like really dorky.

But what I think really defines him is this panel

Robin (1993) Issue #48

This scene is probably what explains him best. Tim is someone who ponders a lot. He thinks constantly all the time whether it's about cases or his personal life, he just goes over the choices he makes constantly because he's just soul-searching alot.

He always means well even if he's awkward about it and he's just a diverse personality overall. The fanon interpretation of his character doesn't really do him any justice because it doesn't address how funny he is or confused or just a likeable, real person in general.

[idkmanwtfishumanityanymore]

y’all someone needs to ban me from this channel ISTG I just got SO HEATED with someone in a comment section for saying Monty and Puppet are in the right for mocking BloodMoons’ brothers death💀

here’s my comment if y’all were curious. (People who are easily upset/affected by BM’s trauma DO NOT READ FURTHER. I went feral💀🙏)

“You do NOT. want to start this fight. Ahem.”

“FIRST OFF, no one fucking deserves to have a serious loss in their life mocked. I don’t care what they’ve done, if Monty and Puppet want to be any better than BloodMoon, they wouldn’t stoop to his level.”

“SECOND, the murderer part? Have you just COMPLETELY FORGOTTEN that they have a programmed bloodlust they CAN’T GET RID OF? Eclipse programmed them to kill, it’s all they’ve ever known. OF COURSE THEY’RE GOING TO KILL PEOPLE IF IT’S THE ONLY THING THEY KNOW.”

“THIRD, I know you didn’t mention it, but they weren’t “incapable of redemption”, when they were staying with Foxy and FC, (sure they had a bomb in their head, but) they were the most “tame” and calm we’d ever seen. Still snarky and making threats left and right, but they accepted the infinitely-bouncing-chicken and played with it for a while, they mostly just sat in silence when they weren’t being bothered, and if I remember correctly- FC and BloodMoon ended up sparring or something, or it was atleast mentioned that FC wanted to spar with them-“

“FOURTH, EVERYONE THEY’VE EVER TRUSTED, BETRAYED OR HURT THEM. Eclipse, their original creator, already betrayed them by forcing an inescapable Lust for blood on them. Lunar, Lunar was using them to get rid of Eclipse, and inevitably abandoned them. Eclipse AGAIN, not only did he MAKE THEM INTO a backup for himself, and forced his way into their minds, but he also MADE THEM go back to the Pizzaplex when they were perfectly happy on the streets killin’ hobos like TrashMan. KillCode, he claimed to be their father, but did he ever really act like it? Sure he gave them advice and blood, but what else did he do for them? Because from what I remember, it sure wasn’t much. Ruin, Ruin rebuilt them after dying to Sun, and SPECIFICALLY PROGRAMMED them to NEED someone to control them, Ruin claimed to care about them, promised their body had nothing strange about it, but when talking to Solar, BloodMoon was informed of a secret, hidden weak point in their casing, which they VERY MUCH were not happy with. Solar, before they even agreed to help him get back Sun and Moon and defeat Ruin, they had a panic attack because they were afraid they’d be tricked and used again- WHICH HEY GUESS WHAT? IT HAPPENED AGAIN JUST LIKE THEY FEARED, Solar promised them they could go free as long as they didn’t go after the Celestial family, or their friends, which up until Solar said he wanted to KILL THEM, they were listening to! They were back out on the town, killing people like the first time they ran away from someone that claimed could be trusted, (The one before having been Lunar) and they only decided to attack any of the family AFTER Solar said he wanted to kill them. (Not including Lunar, that was before the deal with Solar) Rotaerc/Rodrick, creator in disguise, also just using them as a weapon. StitchWraith, literally threatened to separate them and show them what “True loneliness” felt like or some shit. Monty and Foxy, sure they didn’t TRUST those two, but they were still used. Everyone they’ve ever trusted, has used them, betrayed their trust, or hurt them.”

“SPEAKING OF ECLIPSE AGAIN, WHEN STITCHWRAITH SAID SOMETHING THAT REMINDED THEM OF ECLIPSE, THEY HAD A REACTION I CAN ONLY DESCRIBE AS TRAUMATIZED, AT THE THOUGHT OF BEING STUCK WITH SOMEONE LIKE ECLIPSE AGAIN.”

“MAY I ALSO MENTION THAT IN THE EPISODE WITH A REAL BLOOD MOON IN THE SKY, THEY MENTION THAT THEY DON’T LIKE HAVING THIS BLOODLUST? WHEN THEY DON’T CONSUME/SPILL BLOOD, IT’S ALMOST LIKE THE SYMPTOMS OF A SUBSTANCE WITHDRAWAL, WHICH ARE PAINFUL AS HELL.”

“Sorry for the Essay, but I’m 100% willing to go OFF on anyone who just completely disregards that the twins had trauma too. All the villains except maybe Creator, have their own traumas, and I’m sick and tired of everyone ignoring that.”

Y’ALL SOMEONE GET ME AWAY FROM THIS CHANNEL BEFORE I LITERALLY ATTACK SOMEONE AHDHHDHDHFCH /hj

Edit: SCREAMS AND CRIES SUPERSTAR BONGOS REPLIED TO MY COMMENT I COPY-PASTED TO HERE MAKING FUN OF MY AGGRESSION OVER AN OPINION- IDKWHETHER TO LAUGH OR CRY💀🙏

[zaebeecee]

Drowning in Stardust

🦌 RadioDustTober: Short Story Edition 🕷️

Day 03: Unfettered Words

Canon-compliant (pre-relationship)

CWs: None

Alastor doesn’t usually take advice from Husk, save for the one time he did. …well, almost.

Word count: 1400

•••

Alastor had crafted many skills over his long, long existence, from his storytelling ability to his fine and careful control of a knife. Chief among these was his capacity for speech; rarely was Alastor at a loss for words, always quick with a flattering compliment or a joke or an insult as the situation warranted. He knew it was no idle brag to say his vocabulary was extensive and quite impressive, and his mastery of language was dwarfed by very few with whom he had ever exchanged barbs.

One would reasonably believe, then, that he would have no difficulty handling the crass and demotic Angel Dust, who apparently had dedicated the entirety of his linguistic skills to crafting innuendo and double entendres with little room for anything else. Alastor had verbally humiliated Vox in the court of public opinion more than once, a court in which Vox was both judge and bailiff. He had reduced the King of Hell to childish insults (and refused to more closely examine his own behavior) within a matter of minutes. He had talked himself out of situations with angry white men in Louisiana in the 1920s.

No. Angel Dust should have posed no social difficulty to Alastor whatsoever.

And yet…

For some reason that Alastor found quite unfathomable, something about the spider stymied the flow of his words without Angel even making any sort of effort. Every time they locked eyes and Angel put forth another transparently suggestive innuendo, or made a teasing comment at Alastor’s expense, or dropped yet another utterly ludicrous nickname on him… Perhaps it was simply how bold he was—how unafraid he seemed of potential retaliation—but Alastor so often found himself unable to form any sort of real riposte, let alone engage in a true bout of verbal sparring. It wasn’t as though Alastor could think of no words, of course; it was as if a net had formed in his throat, the hanging twine of which was woven too tightly to permit any words better than “is that so” or “you are ridiculous” to pass through to his lips.

He could not truly speak to Angel Dust, and he did not know why. His inability to express whatever it was that repressed itself under the weight of the spider’s puckish and refulgent gaze meant that, were he to manage a beginning of his thoughts, he was completely at a loss as to where said thoughts would lead.

Alastor made an attempt one night, while sitting at the bar in the lobby, to broach the topic to Husk as casually and indirectly as possible. While it was true that he and Husk didn’t have what one might call a cordial relationship, he did know that the former overlord had been well into his seventies when he died, and Alastor would have bet a not inconsiderable sum of money that at least fifty of those years had been spent in the pursuit and seduction of various individuals (or whatever it was the sexually inclined did). The manner of Husk’s behavior was irrelevant, in any case, because Alastor knew seduction required capable speech. Besides, Husk had once been a performer. He also carefully avoided any mention of Angel Dust; to Alastor’s understanding, the two of them had become friends, and Alastor sincerely doubted Husk would appreciate his dearly despised ‘employer’ focusing so intently on one with whom Husk himself had formed something of a protective bond. With all of that in mind, Alastor thought it quite reasonable to find out how the other Sinner would process his thoughts when they refused to make themselves manifest on the tongue.

The look Husk had leveled him with was suspicious, to say the least, and he had allowed the silence to linger for a length of time that even Alastor began to find uncomfortable before he had answered with simple advice: Write it down. Don’t think about what you’re writing, just do it. Whatever comes out on the paper is probably what you really mean. But that damnable look of suspicion had never left his face, and as Alastor left, he wondered if he had truly been that transparent in his request.

Something else, he thought, that he could blame Angel Dust for.

It wasn’t until Alastor was alone in his bedroom, seated at his desk with two fingers of rye and the melodious voice of Bessie Smith gently underscored by the distant sounds of the swamp, that he wondered… was this actually a good idea? If the words did not want to come to him, was it wise for him to question that?

Did he want to know what, precisely, it was that he wished to say to Angel Dust?

Alastor shook off the ridiculousness of those thoughts as he took up his pen and filled it with deep red ink. Of course he wanted to know; for what possible reason would he not? Alastor had always been a creature of curiosity at his core, and curiosity was an itch that existed to be scratched with the sharp claws of knowledge. Resolved in his task, Alastor laid out a fresh sheet of paper and gave himself over as much as he was able to Husk’s advice. He didn’t think, he simply wrote.

Never in my life have I met a creature as infuriating as you, my dear. From your wicked laugh to your playful voice to your mischievous little hands, you have burrowed your way into my mind to seize upon threads of sanity I no longer knew I possessed, tearing them from me with a wink and a kiss of the air, leaving me open and bleeding from wounds untreatable by any poultice and untouchable by any bandage.

I believed myself immune to the oppressive nature of the unknown, for I trusted I had gazed into every existing abyss and walked away triumphant until I was faced with the ever-reaching and never ending expanse of your devilish compassion. Do you know what it is you do to me? No, you could not, for I am certain if you did you would deny the truth of it. So too do I know that, were your gentle conspiracies and your Machiavellian kindnesses a ruse of any color, they would not be half as effective, for it is your infuriating transparency that leads me to wonder what it is I am not seeing even while you insist I see all I possibly could.

Never before have I yearned to know one as I would know you. I wonder at times what it is you have done to me, for the fault must lie with you; each time we part begets a sweet and sweeter ache against which my heart, whose desires are never left unfulfilled for long, rages until that ache becomes the bright and searing pain of endless wondering as I imagine what might be occupying your mind when we are apart. I so often think of the next time we may meet, and I wonder if it will be different; next time, will I follow you in shadowy secret?; next time, will I abscond with you and take you to somewhere unfamiliar and unknown to any of your senses?; next time, will I depart into my shadows as I always do and sit and wonder what next time will bring?

What is this pain you have set upon me, and why do I feel as though none but you shall ever be able to soothe it?

Alastor stared at the paper as the ink dried, his glass of rye empty and the phonograph filling the air with gentle static as the needle skated lightly over nothing but the center of the record. He set down the pen, lifted the paper, and gently folded it into neat thirds, as though preparing to seal it with wax. He then held it between his thumb and his forefinger, the letter catching fire and burning faster and faster until it crumbled and fell to the top of his desk in thin, delicate flakes of black and pale gray.

When Niffty came to clean his room that evening, she found Alastor lying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. When she asked what he was doing, he found he had no real answer he could give her.

He decided he would blame Angel Dust for that, as well.

•••

[thepunkmuppet]

reasons why lorne is queer coded and why I am confused no one talks about the gay icon that he is

he is a stereotypical effeminate gay man down to the voice (i hate that you know the one, but you know the one). he likes glitz and glam and showbiz and female celebrities and parties and pop culture and mimosas and nice clothes and just behaves the way gay men are stereotypically shown/seen to behave (especially in early 2000s media) so um yeah that’s straight up the definition of queer coding but THERES MORE SO IM CONTINUING

his innate passion for music is used as a clear allegory for being different, and by extension sexuality and gender. he was shunned for his unique interest in music by his family and culture, and hated for being different by everyone in pylea despite it being something he couldn’t seem to control. when he comes to earth, he is able to be himself and pursue his passions, and sees pylea and his family environment as literal hell. the culture in pylea is based around conformity and obedience and is run by a shady religious group, so him breaking free from that environment is super relatable for queer people who grew up in religious / anti-lgbt homes

caritas is most definitely a metaphor for a queer safe space / gay bar. there is no violence allowed, humans and demons exist there in peace with each other, and he created it personally from the ground up to provide a space for others like him who are different and might not want to go / be able to go to “normal” or human bars. oh and also there’s a club shooting scene where, despite most of the demons there being peaceful, the shooters are a, afraid of them and b, in this specific case, enjoy hunting and terrorising them for sport because they hate them so much. so. yeah that TOTALLY doesn’t reflect real life queer history and current events not at ALL

the women in the deathwok clan look like bearded men. lorne makes a few comments about cordelia’s beauty and availability as well as some pylean women from the past, but we know that the concept of gender and womanhood is different in pylea. so even if he is attracted to women, his experience of gender and gendered attraction is undeniably queer by human standards regardless

he clearly has a casual thing for angel. like he knows that man is gorgeous but he also knows that angel is in love with like fifteen different people throughout the series and he is just not about that drama

he uses affectionate pet names for everyone, especially angel, ALL THE TIME like honey, baby, muffin, sweetcheeks, angel-cakes etc

he fulfils the gay best friend stereotype very often in the role he plays in episodes, often furthering others’ arcs and the plots of episodes while providing sassy quirky advice and having no personal character growth. bad trope that I do not like but it’s true

he is a kind sweet mum friend and a sassy gay wine aunt at the same time and I love that for him

EDIT I realised this on rewatch recently, I had forgotten there is a scene where just straight up shamelessly asks angel out on a date to a concert. so.

basically I have a lot of feelings about him and I simultaneously relate to him and want him to be my mum and he is a very very special boy who deserves all the love in the world!!! so!!! lorne says happy pride month!!!!

edit: everyone in the tags and comments saying it is obvious you are completely true and correct!! which is why idk why no one talks about him!!!!! I just wanted to put my thoughts into words so here it is

[reason-with-the-underdog]

on sumeru's "free healthcare"

it's been pointed out countless times how alhaitham's voiceline about kaveh where he mention's sumeru's free healthcare doesn't really make sense given what else we know of sumeru society (ie, dori's whole backstory is literally about how her sister died because they couldn't afford medicine, causing dori to value mora above all)

zohreh, a logistics-buyer npc for the akademiya, also talks about free healthcare provided by the akademiya

so at least from the akademiya perspective, there definitely is a policy of free healthcare

zakariya the doctor at the bimarstan also talks about free healthcare

but... there's a very clear lack of respect for patients in the way he talks about them, where it's apparently common practice to call what the doctors do divine magic aka "the healing" to avoid having to explain medical treatments to patients in doctors' care

to be fair, zakariya has some reasons for trying to skip actually explain medical treatments:

understaffing (not enough medical staff, too many patients)

religious belief of patients (people ignoring medical instructions and wanting religious-based treatments)

being overworked and exhausted (as a result of point 1)

this is further emphasised in the case of aaru village, which is quite far from the akademiya and the bimarstan.

the only doctor there is maruf, who lacks confidence in his own abilities, and says that the bimarstan mostly just sends supplies over

maruf's actual ability to treat patients in aaru village is unclear; zakariya thinks that he's perfectly capable but faces negative bias/stereotypes of being a "village doctor"

so overall sumeru's healthcare seems to be:

free treatment if you can get a doctor to see you (but they may lie about what the treatment is and how it works)

you may have to wait a long time to see a doctor if you visit the bimarstan in sumeru city because of understaffing

if you are not in sumeru city, the available facilities are much worse (less experienced doctors, have to wait to receive supplies/advice from birmarstan)

many people have pointed out that sumeru's healthcare system has similarities to real world systems:

universal healthcare systems that are underfunded (long waiting lists)

remote villages (rural vs urban dynamic)

thanks @chefmaocooking!

definitely it seems like alhaitham's remark about free healthcare meaning that orphans wouldn't be going hungry is facetious, if not outright naive

(i'm inclined to think this is alhaitham's classic humor, where he says things that are technically true to misdirect the listener)

[television-overload]

of our own making

(an X-Files fanfic)

Chapter 21/34 - eggs benedict

[Read on AO3]

It’s strange, staying with Sheriff Adderly and his wife Ellen during this case in Vermont. If he had his way, he’d be checked into a motel instead of infringing on their hospitality, but he’d been given no choice. They even refused reimbursement for their troubles, which did nothing to lessen the feeling—however true or untrue it was—of him being a burden to them.

Ellen Adderly had pulled out all the stops for their guest, preparing decadent meals on fine china for every meal, claiming she’d have done it whether he was there or not. He has a hard time believing that. He can’t imagine living in such a way every day of his life. He and Scully barely manage to set out real plates to eat on when they order takeout at home, and he certainly doesn’t expect her to have a three course meal set out when he gets back from work. Besides the fact that she’s always at work with him, it’s just not something he thinks is necessary. Is that something she’d want to do? He doesn’t think so. 

The routine they have works for them, that’s all that matters.

But after getting a taste of his own personal brand of domesticity, it’s… odd… to see how others do it. He’d never have thought there were so many different ways to balance home life, much less enough that he’d start to form an opinion on them. His parents had been one way—not a particularly healthy relationship—and he and Scully are… well, they’re not really anything besides roommates, but that still counts, in his book.

Whatever they are, he likes it. Far better than this constant fussing, at least.

Mrs. Adderly must notice his discomfort, because at breakfast as she masterfully puts the finishing touches on his eggs benedict, she says “I get the feeling you're not used to anyone taking care of you,” and for some reason, that assumption grates on his nerves.

He takes a measured draw from his cup of steaming coffee, swallowing back his immediate retort.

“What makes you say that?” he asks instead. She probably hadn’t meant anything by it, but it still comes off as rude. He has someone to take care of him, thanks very much. Just not exactly in the same way as Mrs. Adderly insists on taking care of her husband… and apparently Mulder too.

“I’m sorry,” Ellen says, realizing her statement had come out somewhat offensive. “I just mean… I didn’t see a wedding band.”

She nods at his left hand sitting atop the table, and he follows her gaze to the bare ring finger.

“Do you have a significant other, Agent Mulder?” she asks.

Significant? Yes. Very. Other? That’s a good descriptor. Single, married, other. Yeah, he’d select other, if this were a multiple choice question. Although he’s pretty sure that’s not what she meant.

“I’ve– um…” he starts, wondering how best to describe his situation to this woman. “I’ve got a wife, actually.” He pulls out the ring on its chain to show her. “It can be dangerous in my line of work to have it on display,” he explains lamely before tucking it back into his shirt.

Ellen smiles. “Ah, well that’s good. Don't miss out on home and family, Mr. Mulder. I imagine with all the things you see, you need that refuge more than most.”

Her words hang in the air, a bit of sage advice from a woman he otherwise has very little in common with. But before he really has a chance to think about what she’s said, Sheriff Adderly makes an appearance, and it’s back to business. Ellen excuses herself to go check on their daughter, leaving the two of them alone to discuss the case.

Mulder remains seated at the table, staring down the sheriff with a knowing look. He’d begun to suspect—and now his suspicions are all but confirmed—that the man had been unfaithful to his wife, and it makes him feel sick. Here this man has it all; a loving wife, a sweet baby that they didn’t have to jump through a million hoops to get, and yet he’s willing to throw it all away for some cheap thrills.

He’ll never understand it.

The man is no more forthcoming about his knowledge of the case than he had been before, so Mulder lets it slide for now. The last thing he wants to do is show all his cards too early and spook him. He gives him just enough to leave him rattled. To let him know that he knows . 

He lets the unspoken threat hang between them until the sheriff folds, squirming away to take a shower, or so he says. 

He’s still seething in bitter disgust when Ellen returns, carrying her sleepy baby in her arms. It’s a well-practiced juggling act, Mulder can tell, as she goes about fixing herself a plate of her now lukewarm breakfast. With only one arm, she clearly struggles to transfer strips of bacon out of the pan, and Mulder gets to his feet.

“Here, let me help,” he says, joining her in the kitchen. What he’d meant was that he could help assemble her plate, but as he goes to reach for the spatula, he instead finds himself being handed a baby, and his eyes widen comically. “Oh, right,” he says, then plasters a forced smile on his face. Sure, this was what he’d meant to do all along. 

The little girl is heavier than he’d expected. Like a sack of flour, though with limbs jutting out everywhere. It takes him a moment to adjust, his hands holding her awkwardly beneath the armpits. 

“Hi,” he says conversationally, looking down at her like she’s a ticking time bomb that could explode at any moment. The baby just blinks at him, a blank stare on her face. “Okay,” he mutters to himself, lifting her to his hip and returning to the table. He makes every effort to not look like this isn’t the first time he’s held a baby in—well, basically forever, but he’s not sure he succeeds.

Ellen smiles across the table at him and digs into her meal.

“Do you have children, Agent Mulder?” she asks, “You and your wife?”

It still makes his heart flutter to hear someone refer to Scully as such, but he supposes that to Ellen, it really is that simple. Scully is his wife, that’s all she knows.

He’d always thought conversations like this to be so dull. ‘So, Dave, how’s the ol’ ball and chain? Kids staying out of trouble?’  But, now… 

Well, it’s different now that he actually has something to contribute to the discussion.

“Yeah, actually, one on the way,” he says, giving a self-conscious little smile. 

He’s never told anybody about this other than Skinner, but he supposes there’s no harm in telling this random woman in Vermont. It almost makes him feel… normal. Like he can relate to other people over the simple fact of his impending fatherhood. A shared human experience. A milestone in his life that doesn’t involve aliens, ghosts, ghouls, or any manner of cryptozoological entity.

“We’re adopting,” he further explains. “Only a couple months left till the birth mother’s due date.”

“Oh, that’s wonderful!” Ellen exclaims, smiling up at him over her bowl of fresh fruit. “You must be so excited!”

“Very,” he says, looking down at the drooling baby on his lap. “We never really thought it was possible. That we’d ever—” 

He pauses, the shrill tone of his cell phone breaking into their conversation.

“Speaking of my wife,” he says, flipping open the device. “Hey, Scully. How’s the stakeout going?”

Her voice crackles over the other side of the line, drawing a genuine smile out of him. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t ask that, Mulder, so that I can give you the good news I just received.”

His stomach does a flip. “Good news?”

He pictures her nodding, sitting in that grimy, cold room surrounded by surveillance equipment, somehow brightening it with her smile. “Krista called and we had a little chat.”

Mulder looks up at Ellen from across the table, where she’s watching him with a knowing smile. “Oh?” he says.

“Mm-hmm. And you know what she told me?”

Scully is extra cheeky this morning, huh? He misses her horribly. This is the last time he’s letting Skinner split them up for a case. After this, no more. He’s putting his foot down. What are they going to do, fire him?

“What did she tell you?” he asks, turning to instead stare at the floorboards, giving himself the illusion of privacy despite the constant watch of Mrs. Adderly.

“She told me the sex of the baby. Would you like to know?”

His heart thumps in his chest suddenly, its rhythm erratic. This, he hadn’t expected first thing in the morning. He hasn’t even finished his first cup of coffee yet.

“She finally found out?”

“Yeah, Krista said she was a lot more cooperative at this appointment than the last one,” Scully explains.

Mulder freezes.

“She?” he says, his voice raspy with awe. “It’s a girl?”

He hears Scully release a shuddering breath before her voice comes back, with all the telltale signs of happy tears that he’s come to recognize in the last few months.

“It’s a girl,” she confirms.

It’s a girl. He’s gonna have a baby girl.

“That’s– that’s amazing, Scully! That’s… wow!”

“I know,” she says. “I’m– You’re not disappointed, are you?”

“Disappointed?” he asks, furrowing his brow. “Why would I be disappointed?” 

Disappointed is the absolute last thing he’d be feeling right now. Elated is a better word. Maybe a little scared, but he’ll get over it.

“I don’t know, I just thought… You know, you talked about coaching little league, and I’m sure you want someone to watch basketball with you…”

He laughs. He can’t help but laugh. “Just because you don’t like basketball doesn’t mean other girls don’t,” he says matter-of-factly. “And have you seen girls softball teams, Scully? They’re brutal. You try getting hit by one of those giant neon yellow ostrich eggs at 50 miles an hour. I volunteered to practice with the girls once in high school. Almost lost an eye.”

“But what if she doesn’t like sports at all?” Scully asks, and he’d bet good money that she’s chewing on her lip right now, the way she does when she’s worried. “What if she’s on the chess team or plays the violin or the piano?”

Oh, Scully.

“Then I’ll learn all the names of her concertos and cheer her on at every chess tournament,” he answers simply. “Look, Scully, I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but you and I are both gigantic nerds. I think we’ll be prepared for whatever she’s interested in when she gets older.”

She . They can finally stop talking about her in abstract terms. A girl. A daughter.

“Your mom’s gonna flip,” he says when she doesn’t respond. Margaret Scully has a grandson, but no granddaughter. He can just see the little plaid dresses, frilly socks, Mary Jane shoes, and giant velvet bows in their future. She’ll be spoiled rotten.

“I can’t wait to meet her,” Scully says, sounding wistful. 

“Me too,” he agrees. “When I get back, we’re going out shopping again. I think maybe this time I’ll be able to hold it together in the clothes section.”

That earns him a laugh.

“I’m willing to bet it will go the same way as last time,” she teases back, and she’s probably not wrong. Just picturing this baby, a little girl like the one he’s holding now, has him emotionally on edge.

“I– I’ll talk to you later, okay?” he says, glancing up at the clock. “Let the thought of warm baby snuggles keep you from freezing your butt off.”

She sighs, the annoyance of her less than ideal assignment returning. “Thanks for reminding me, ” she intones.

They stay on the line a moment more, waiting to see who will be the one to hang up. Eventually he hears a soft click, and he smiles down at the phone in his hand. Goodbyes have never been necessary between them. Maybe that’s just another way they’re weird, but he likes it.

The baby in his lap gurgles, and he sets his phone on the table to turn his attention back to her. He sees her differently now, with the knowledge that he has a little girl on the way too.

“You’re going to be an amazing father,” Ellen says, eyes shining as she watches him.

Mulder feels his cheeks beginning to burn. “Oh. Thanks.”

“No, really,” she says more insistently. “You seem to care a lot already. And wanting to be involved… Well, that’s everything. Your wife is a very lucky woman.”

“I’m the one who’s lucky,” he says, and he truly believes it.

He’s the luckiest man on the face of the Earth.

~~~

wife guy / girl dad mulder says you get another chapter :)

Chapter 22/34 - pizza boxes

The sound of keyboards clacking fills the dimly-lit room. A greasy bag that once held at least a dozen cheap tacos from the place across town sits atop a stack of empty pizza boxes, not that the inhabitants of this particular abode pay much attention to that kind of thing. 

“Hey, here's something weird,” Langly says, looking up from the computer monitor, the unnatural light of it reflecting off his glasses.

“What? Is it Krycek again?” Frohike asks, crossing the short distance to lean over the other man’s shoulder. “What’s that little rat up to now?”

Langly adjusts the bright, warm-toned desk lamp to minimize the glare on the screen.

“No, just something strange in my sweep of government records,” he says.

“Mention of a virus? Shadow government stuff?”

Langly shakes his head. “It flagged a document mentioning Mulder and Scully's names.”

This bit of information piques Byers’ interest from across the room. “What agency? Homeland? DoD?” he asks, joining the other two at Langly’s computer.

“County court in Annapolis, Maryland,” Langly reads off the screen. “Dated December 24, 1999.”

“Open it!” Frohike demands impatiently.

It takes only a few seconds to hack the database, which is a little alarming. What would the public think if they knew how insecure county records are? But that’s a concern for another day. 

The document slowly appears on screen, and three pairs of eyes take in the information all at once.

“That's… unexpected,” Byers says.

“Married? Since when?” Frohike exclaims.

Langly looks up at him with a condescending glare and smacks the older man in the stomach. “Since Christmas, idiot, haven't you been paying attention?”

“Not that, stupid,” Frohike says, quick to respond with a slap to the back of the blond man’s shaggy head. “Since when are they an item? Did I miss something?”

“You seen a rock on her finger lately? I haven't,” Langly comments.

“Get Mulder on the phone, that little sneak owes us an explanation!” Frohike snaps, pointing a finger at Byers.

The phone rings a few times before it connects, the voice of their friend coming through on speakerphone.

“Now's not a good time, boys,” he says. There's some kind of noise in the background, someone speaking, but they can’t make out who it is. It doesn’t sound like anyone they know. 

“Mulder!” Frohike yells into the phone. “What gives, man?!”

“Yeah, bro, we'd have thrown you a bachelor party if we'd known,” Langly adds.

A sigh crackles through on the other end of the line, and Mulder murmurs something indistinguishable to someone before finding somewhere quieter to talk.

“How'd you find out?” he asks, sounding annoyed.

“Your marriage license record came up in one of our regular sweeps. No other threats, by the way,” Byers answers.

“Except maybe Frohike,” Langly jokes. “He might want to challenge you for her hand.”

Byers snickers.

“Shut up! I'm happy for them,” Frohike says, glaring at his friends.

Langly rolls his eyes. “You never stood a chance.”

“There's an explanation for this, I swear, now's just really not a good time,” Mulder says, insistent.

“What's there to explain?” Frohike asks. “You guys fell in love and got married without telling your best friends. No big deal.”

He’s not genuinely trying to guilt trip Mulder, but it does sting a little that they hadn’t said anything to them. Maybe just a little tiny guilt trip. A guilt excursion, if you will.

“It's not… really that simple,” Mulder says, his words hesitant.

“What do you mean?” Byers asks.

“I know you didn't knock her up, obviously, so what more is there?” Langly says, as delicate as a brick to the face.

“Well,” Mulder says, “I kind of did, in a manner of speaking.”

“Scully's pregnant?” Byers asks. This is shocking news. It should be impossible! “But—”

“No, Scully's not pregnant,” Mulder quickly corrects before the conversation can spiral out of control more than it already has. “But… we are expecting, actually. Hopefully.”

“IVF?” Byers asks.

“Not IVF. We tried that last year though, you're a little late to the party.”

Jeez, what haven’t they missed? Maybe the real conspiracy is whatever the heck is going on with Mulder and Scully.

“Then, what—?”

“We're adopting,” he says, interrupting them. They can almost hear his smile over the phone, all goofy and care-free. “There's a woman that selected us to adopt her baby when she’s born, so… I'm actually at this class for new parents with Scully right now. I should probably be getting back. Don't want the teacher to flunk me.”

“Wait wait wait,” Frohike says. “Adopting? How long have you guys been… you know?”

“Well we only started talking about it back in November. It's honestly moving pretty fast, but we're excited.”

“Not that,” Frohike says, waving his hands in the air. “You and Scully!”

“Oh,” Mulder says awkwardly. “Um, we actually aren't. A couple, I mean. If that's what you're asking.”

Frohike’s jaw drops. “You're kidding.”

“No, I'm not.”

“But you're married!” Langly insists.

“A formality.”

“The IVF!”

“Favor for a friend.”

“Yeah, right!” Frohike says with a laugh, sharing a disbelieving look with the other Gunmen.

“You love her, don't you?” Byers asks, sincerity breaking through his friends’ incredulity.

“If you're just gonna harass me, I'm going to hang up.”

Okay, so he’s done sharing for now. They’ll just have to try to get more out of him later.

“Mulder… what are we going to do with you?” Frohike asks, shaking his head.

“Listen, guys, I've got to go. We're learning how to change a diaper and I'd really like to not make a fool of myself, if at all possible.”

“Wait,” Frohike says. “Tell Scully congrats for us. We're happy for you, Mulder.”

“Yeah, we just think you're a complete idiot too,” Langly adds bluntly.

“Thanks, guys. We're really happy. Sorry I haven't been around, it's been crazy.”

Well, now at least they know why Mulder has been missing their poker nights and D&D lately.

“Don't worry about it, Mulder. Just—maybe tell us what's going on next time?” Byers suggests.

Mulder puffs out a laugh. “Sure, next time I marry my partner with the purpose of adopting a child, I'll let you know.”

Frohike points seriously at the phone, despite the fact that Mulder can’t see it. “Watch it, buddy, you're already on thin ice.”

“I'll talk to you guys soon,” Mulder says. “Oh, and if you're ever looking for me, I'm staying at Scully’s apartment now, by the way. I gave up my apartment.”

“Dude…” Langly says. There's something seriously wrong with those two.

“Alright, I gotta go. I'll tell Scully you say hi.” And with that, he hangs up, leaving the three amigos to take in everything they’d just learned.

“Aren't a couple…” Frohike grumbles, repeating his words. “They're a couple of idiots, I'll tell you that.”

Byers nods his agreement, and Langly shrugs. 

“Lucky kid, though.”

~~~

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[radiofreesanjak]

[ECHO.EXE RUNNING]

- I- um. H-hello. I-

- ...

- Mine apologies. I am n-nervous, as things art tense at the moment and this is one of the two most i-illegal contacts I have ever made, and the topic itself doth frighten me.

- I am Ren Hurst, sister of Rosceline Hurst. I b-believe thou hast had previous contact with a friend; one Marceline, a maid and beloved of mine sister. Um...

- I do ramble. I... thou hast made several posts calling for the abdication of noble titles, and... I do beseech thee for advice on a related matter...

- I care very little for mine title of Scion. Twas always the case, truth be told. The only reason I have not abdicated already is for fear of mine m-mother. I am unaware of how much thou knowest of recent developments mine sister hath posted here, but we do plan a coup against our mother for her barbarous treatment of ignobles. Once she is... d-dealt with... I intend to abdicate posthaste.

- The problem I seek thine advice upon regardeth mine sister. Tis not that I believe she would refuse to do the same, but rather I don't know that it is wise. I know how that doth sound and I understand the evils of this system, but... The legal standing of mine sister's title as Heiress is the only thing which shall keep the other Minor Houses and the House of Remembrance from viewing our actions as a full ignoble revolt.

- Frankly, we haven't the resources nor the firepower to defend ourselves from all angles: pirates on our planet, every other Minor House backed by the Major to suppress a revolt, Harrison Armory at the door? So many have offered to help us, but a handful of lancers shan't be enough. We have too many enemies. What are we to do? Should we really give up such a potent tool, which shields us and our people, out of principle?

- These questions art not meant in an argumentative way; they are genuine inquiries. I know thou thinkest low of nobility, but I promise thee we seek only the safety and freedom of our people.

------

OOC: Hi! Name's Kiwi! Wanted to introduce myself along with the ask! Sorry it's so damn long, i had a lot of information I was trying to compress. Anyway I hope you have a lovely night! :D

Oh, you mean that the vaunted liberal House of Remembrance might react badly to the wishes of its nobles peacefully abdicating to give power to the people? The liberals, who are so kind in how they trod upon our backs?

Ah, I jest and you seem anxious. Some in our audience seem to deny that such a problem could occur among liberals. Let me reassure you:

The strategy in fighting the House of Remembrance is to turn their ethics against them. They say they seek to respect the ignoble, just without reforming the system? You posit that the extreme politics of your mother has required concessions. You have spoken to the Republicans who live under you (they surely exist, especially if what i have heard is true) and decided that the most appropriate apology is a concession of power to them. This is an action you are taking to prevent an Ignoble uprising, for surely you have seen the seeds of us unkind Ungratefuls among your populace.

This is a strategy that worked for some sympathizers in the House of Dust. The noble house cedes their territory to the councils of the people they once ruled, and says they do so because it was the only peaceful option. It leaves those who would contest you in a bind: if they intervene in a peaceful transition of power they would risk conflict for real. This is a problem made worse for the liberal; do they not differentiate themselves from the federalists among them by their sympathy for the plight of the ignoble?

As for your fellow minor houses, who I hear lean less sympathetic to those on Arrudye, think about it like this: they could respond as they do, but their action in this regard risks remand from both the House of Remembrance and Harrison Armory smelling blood in the water. This action would surely rally any Ungrateful to your defense. Could they risk a prolonged conflict?

A course of action to think on. A different set of potential allies to reach out to, perhaps.

Let me know if you wish for me to find my comrades in your area.

OOC: Hi! No worries, everyone knows I'm no stranger to the text wall. You too!

[prettyplumpkitty]

I have this issue in my life and I have nowhere else to really present it.

It’s the longest story in the world but I will try to be concise.

My brother in law & his wife are a wreck.

They are both mentally ill; him physically ill as well with an autoimmune thing. They have two kids, both autistic, one non verbal. So a lot on their plate. They are also fifteen & ten years younger than me, respectively.

They live 4 miles from us in a 250K+ home that my mother in law bought for them and helps pays to maintain. She is also semi-retired and spends any time not working at her health care job cleaning their house & taking care of their kids so my brother in law can do…nothing.

He has no real hobbies other than video games and no other interests. He is bitter about “living at home” again and refuses to go into town, lest someone he knew from the past “see” him. His wife is the breadwinner and their interpersonal relationship can be very toxic at times.

Suffice it to say, they are just very unhappy. My brother in law looks up to mister, his 9 years older brother, especially since they lost their dad almost a decade ago. But there has become a very negative, horrible bias against us where these two think our lives are super easy & have been.

Brother in law is currently not speaking to mister and ignoring messages and attempts to communicate. He will, however, continue to text & talk to our 14 year old son. This is not the first time this has happened at all. Brother in law will get it in his head that we’ve slighted him by not coming to visit him at his house enough (he won’t step foot in our house) and that everyone hates him and thinks he’s a loser (which is kinda true cause he acts this way…self fulfilling prophecy).

What’s recently come out is that brother in law and his wife are mad jealous.

Which in a way I understand because I know how my life presents on paper so to speak. I am excellent at curating a beautiful existence on Facebook & Instagram which is the only way those two look in on us. I am so good at it, I’ve made a position for myself at work with my skills and no college degree.

But more than anything, it’s that mister and I chose to have a positive attitude about the difficulties & struggles we’ve encountered in this life.

THAT’S what makes things look “easy” for us.

But it really hasn’t been and I’m growing very resentful for these very much younger folks thinking everything has been peachy keen when I was parenting a child while they were still fucking babies themselves. There are parts to my life they know NOTHING about and mister’s too.

We have gotten to the point where we are ready to cut all ties because it is too toxic and they always target us when things are going especially rough for them or my brother in law is in some bipolar mood. However, my mother in law LIVES with us so it is very hard to avoid the topic. It is all very drama-inducing and I hate drama.

So, any advice? Not sure what I’m asking specifically but I had to get some off my chest. It just sucks knowing people are super jealous of you AND think you’ve taken easy street when it’s not at all the case. Mister doesn’t let other people have that kind of authority over his own narrative but I am always plagued by feeling, is there truth to this? when someone is upset with me.

[cyberdragoninfinity]

Hello, I've been enjoying your Arc-V reactions so much. I had a question since you called Yuya your favorite protagonist, do you have some like deeper character analysis thoughts on him? I feel like I had a strong grasp of his character in season 1, but in seasons 2 and 3 I don't think I understood well what the writers were going for with him, other than he's extremely repressed because both parents told him he's never allowed to get angry or cry and express any negative emotions.

WAH THANK YOU apologies this took ten thousand years to get to..late june/july is always busy for my art fightin' ass

ANYWAY IVE BEEN HMMING AND PONDERING OVER THIS FOR A WHILE and like. i think the tricky thing with yuya is that, well, i don't think the WRITERS even fully had a grasp on what they wanted to go for with him in the later seasons (and/or what they wanted to do with arc-v's themes. and the plot. and the all of it lmao) so it really is a bit of a 'there's multiple reads you can have on this character and while not all of 'em are right, not all of 'em are probably wrong either'; the narrative frankly doesn't have a strong enough backbone for like the entire second half to put full conviction into one definite read. Great news for guys who like to think way too much about yugioh characters!! Less great news for "trying to actually grasp wtf the actual honest to god true intent of the writing was" 🥴

All that on the table and now aside, let's talk about the little unwell tomato of the hour. First I do think it's a bit misleading to say Yuya's especially repressed, per say--there's an element of unconscious ignoring/avoidance to repression, and let's be real this kid is certainly not ignoring his negative emotions. The negative emotions are beating his ass. He is spending half the series having catastrophic emotional meltdowns and veering directly into sobs and explosive rage outbursts and feeling Bad almost constantly. I think with him it's more an instance of him having just an absolute pisspoor handling on his emotional regulation... because yeah his parents have been giving him terrible self-help advice for years </3

I don't think theyve necessarily told him he's not allowed to be sad/get angry/express negative emotions--instead it's more of a case where (with Yusho especially) Yuya's being told if he DOES feel sad or upset, then that needs to be met with a smile in order to truly push past it and to feel better, i.e. if you fake the laughter then it will become genuine laughter and youll be a-ok and HAPPY!! YAY HAPPY ^_^ (yusho you cant fucking say that to your coughing baby who's also a hydrogen bomb!!!! oh god!!!!)

arc-v is Very into this idea of illustration emotions as through the metaphor of a pendulum (huh wonder why) especially like.... 'when you're crying, laugh instead, and that will swing your emotions back around again into positive ones' and 'if you're courageous and confident and push through feeling upset, that courage will swing back and turn into happiness.' which is like... IT'S ALMOST SOMETHING. THEYRE ALMOST SAYING SOMETHING MEANINGFUL. BUT YUYA IS SUCH A BAD MAIN CHARACTER TO EMBODY THIS THEMATIC CONCEPT. he's neurotic and kind of not particularly brave and wretchedly insecure and again his emotional regulation is complete dogwater and he's not a very good, confident duelist (or showman even) and so on and so forth. And the problem I think is as you get into season 2 and 3 the stakes keep getting higher and urgent but Yuya doesn't really like.... Grow very much in those aforementioned areas. They just start piling more and more insane shit on him and then it's not just his dad telling him to smile more but also like half the rest of the cast and the narrative itself BUT THERE NEVER GETS TO BE A MOMENT WHERE LIKE. THAT MANTRA FEELS EARNED, FOR YUYA. The writers reeeeally really want him to be this embodiment of laughter and always swinging back around to smile in the face of adversity but most of the moments we see them trying to make Yuya out to be this in the show, where his dueling brings smiles to everyone and ends classism and makes the bad guys nice immediately, they just feel kind of....fake. ive mentioned before how the end of arc-v feels like a fake tumblr post but alongside that a lot of season 2/3's writing for yuya feels like the exaggerated parody of steven universe that su critical blogs in 2015 were convincing themselves existed. and don't get me wrong it's fucking hysterical, I think it's hilarious yuya fixed arc-v aster in like two duels and now he's not an authoritarian child soldier anymore, but we do have to also Be So Serious.

sorry i just needed to post CHILL OUT ON THE GLOOM AND DOOM :/ again. this aster definitely has killed people but it's fine yuya fixed him. he's fine.

IMO It's hard to get a grasp on/understand Yuya's character in the later half of the series cuz yuya's character is so weighed down with these big idealistic themes the show didn't actually put any work towards getting him on a narratively satisfying track to fulfill them. He spends like 2/3s of season two literally locked in rooms astral projecting every so often like COME ON. and season 3 much like a lot of arc-v ALMOST GETS THERE. ALMOST SAYS SOMETHING, WITH YURI AND WITH ZARC. What happens when someone's happiness comes about from pain and violence? What happens when a smile is full of malice? That could be such a cool opportunity to explore the pitfalls of the pendulum emotion metaphor the show sets up, how that can be twisted into something harmful, but. well. that's not what we got huh :,)

anyway all that to say i think yuya's a sweet kid who has such a genuinely big heart and is a really interesting character, but it's almost this sort of key feature of his that he's really not a terribly happy person despite the smiley emoji-shaped hole the show's plot tries to jam him into (and cuz of that there's just so much dissonance in that that makes his whole deal kind of murky when all is said and done.) he's really a character that just has nonstop shit Happening to him whether he wants it to or not and it's kind of insane how little agency he has for like... So Much of the Show. He's made into a mouthpiece for Smile Away Da Pain and like.... for what? [arc-v spoilers if it matters] at the end of the series the other three yuboys are effectively dead and soul-absorbed and don't come back and it's like. you cant Smile World that loss away, arc-v. yknow?

i have no idea what my point was anymore, it is very late haha. LOVE YUYA. THEY COULD HAVE SAID SOME REALLY THOUGHT PROVOKING SHIT WITH HIM. AND YET !