#what the hell are they feeding these campers?

[localicecreambiter]

demi god LU time

the law of hyperfixations says you must combine interests at every given chance

adding a cut here as to not clog feeds!! its a real long post

i wanna hear thoughts too! so dont be afraid to comment. these are my personal opinions and i wanna hear if anyone agrees or disagrees :D (apologies for all the tags btw)

edit to add the stupid doodle

the gods all have favorites, and ironically none of them are their own kids (save for hades: he loves his kid. doesn't make him a good parent, but you know?)

In a more Zelda timeline abiding setting; Originally they weren't all at camp halfblood at the same time, but time shenanigans decided they were to be brought together

Imagine Chiron’s surprise when 7 of his dead campers waltz into camp (this happens EVERY SINGLE TIME they enter camp. Dionysus is completely unfazed, knowing the bs time shit the gods are dealing with atm)

By the time they enter camp in Wild’s Hyrule for the second time he kinda understands (Wind and Sky didnt have a Camp Halfblood, for the record, for obvious reasons)

Alternatively, its some form of modern au where they’re just from different parts of Hyrule (skyloft, downfall, ordonia, windfall peninsula, hyrule town (different from castle town), the list goes on) which would make a lot more sense for this kinda au (the world would’ve just had a LOT of calamities within the span of a few years, some of the heroes knowing about camp and others not so much)

(i think Legend, Wars, Time, Wind (post WW) and Four would’ve known about Camp Halfblood while the others were just kinda on their own until after their quests) meaning over half of them didn’t have prophecies and just went to deal with the issue themselves, possibly meaning on their journey they learned of camp

Ok well, all of them but Wars, who grew up at Camp Halfblood

All Zelda’s are children of Athena, save for Skyward Sword Zelda since she's the reincarnation of Hylia (yeah, im keeping the original Zelda goddesses! What of it?)

At some point fairly early on, a Zelda only had a son, who got together with Athena at some point and boom

Sky: child of Zeus 

self explanatory 

God of the skies? his name is literally Sky

not to mention how fucking powerful he is?

he was the "first" Link; Zeus was technically the first God, it makes sense (this is such a stupid reason)

The skies are his home, Zeus finding someone on Skyloft and “falling in love” with their love of the sky too results in this bad boy right here

The demise fight? Only a zeus kid could harbor lightning like that

A camp counselor in the modern setting (ik typically once you’re 18, you’re no longer a camper really, but shhhh)

Wind: child of Poseidon 

Don't roll your eyes, i've got a reason!!

the 4 wind gods throw a fit anytime he's sent on a quest (they all love him even if they won't admit it)

A world purely ocean and islands? Poseidon would have a fuckin ball

The Great Sea needed a hero, Wind was brought about more for necessity than out of the want to have a child (this leaves a hard disconnect between wind and the gods, knowing his dad didn’t really have him out of love for his mom but because the world needed to be saved)

The irony of Poseidon being the patron of pegasi and horses and Wind not knowing what a horse is will never not be a funny thought

Has more control over the wind than he does the sea (for now) 

he, like Legend, pointedly ignores that he's a demi-god, especially since he comes after the Hero of Time (kinda hard to live up to that, even outside of a demi-god au)

The ocean and winds are his mood ring: you upset him the wind gods are after you

In a modern setting, the same reason applies kinda; a quest under the sea would be virtually impossible for anyone but a child of Poseidon, and hell knows a cyclopes isnt gonna be sent (gotta love those prophecies) 

OR!! OR AND HEAR ME OUT

Wind isnt a demigod

The wind gods still adore him, but he doesn't have the hero’s spirit and i think that’d kinda translate to not being a demigod, yet still being the one who was destined to go on the quest because there just weren't any demigods to do it

Still not set on which id go with

Legend: child of Hades 

Ah yes, child of the big three goes on so many quests trope. Love to see it

he's Apollo's favorite favorite (Warriors is jealous as hell. Thats his dad! Wdym he likes Legend more????) 

Pointedly ignores the fact he's a demigod (at least, he definitely tries to)

Blessed by (and beefing with) so many gods from his quests

probably one of the few heroes who's spoken to their godly parent (trust me, it was out of obligation rather than free will)

Prefers helping out the more minor, underappreciated, and not as needy or bitchy gods (like Hestia, for example)

curses the Olympians constantly, they've learned to ignore him, hes their best questing kid

Sort of a general camp counselor since Hades doesn't really have kids (its technically his last year but hes been there the longest out of everyone)

Managed to block the oracle over iris message

After his trip to the dark world and lorule, the gods go haywire around him, much to his delight (because it means they leave him alone)

Hyrule: child of Hecate 

adopted by Hermes (much to the dismay of all the Hermes children)

I was on the line between Hecate, Apollo, and Hermes; Hyrule’s affinity for magic and the blood curse resulted in Hecate to win 

Very detached from the gods, the help he receives is never outright but more subtle blessings

The gods like to ignore Downfall after Legend died tbh (outside of modern, obviously)

Well, they still ignore Downfall as a city/country. 

Only learned of camp thanks to Legend, otherwise he wouldn’t have had a clue it existed

Wild: child of Athena 

Also adopted by Hermes 

One of the more chaotic children of Athena

The idea of Athena being his godly parent sourced from his resourcefulness and quick battle (or just general) strategies, along with his pre-calamity self being stoic and more on the critical side

Completely forgot he was a demigod and just let loose, Athena is more than slightly perturbed by him and yet so infatuated

Supervises archery at camp

Warriors: child of Apollo 

exemplifies almost 0 traits of his father other than his looks and his affinity for medicine (shit archer, shit musician, can't write poetry)

blessed by Athena during the war since he was struggling so much, she always has a soft spot for the heros since they fight to protect her daughters so hard (aka pity blessing) 

Actively beefing with Ares 

Aphrodite likes to keep an eye on him, mostly for entertainment (she woulda eaten the whole Cia debacle UP)

Very notorious in camp considering he was a war captain at the ripe age of 17; once learning of the whole Camp Jupiter has apartments and college for half bloods insisted and led a project at CHB to get something similar built (which is where he, Sky and Twilight stay after turning 18)

Twilight: child of Demeter

His love for ranch animals and caring for his farm lead me to this decision

Also the whole wolf thing, that also counts

Appalled by the fact Wind doesn't know what a horse is considering he's literally the son of Poseidon (jealous the kid can talk to Epona and he can't)

After his journey to the twilight, the gods kinda flicker between Greek and Roman around him so they tend to avoid him like Legend

blessed/cursed by Lupa, hence the wolf thing

Teaches foraging lessons at camp

Four: child of Hephaestus

He's the smithy, I couldn’t not say he's a Hephaestus kid

received a lot less help from the gods since he was one of the first 

started advocating that heros receive help from the divine after LU concludes so those after him have a fighting chance (not in the modern setting)

I havent played many of his games, but the kinstones sound like a thing Hephaestus would scatter across the earth as scrap from his creations

Not one of the fire wielders (the only one that can wield fire is Red when split, mostly because of the elemental bs in minish cap)

After drawing the Four Sword, Janus (despite being roman (i like to think the four sword would be a roman artifact, it just feels right)) was suddenly pretty interested and bestowed what wisdom he had for the demi-god

Vulcan, Neptune, Aeolus, and Ceres all came together to forge the elemental stones; the Minish were still the ones to bestow the sword to Hylian people

The gods tend to avoid him too, for the same reason they avoid Twilight and Legend (dark world shenanigans and the Four Sword)

He loves the damn forge at CHB, and was ecstatic seeing the one at Camp Jupiter

He was asked by Chiron if he would be interested in running a forge class for young demigods (be it his siblings or anyone interested) but sadly declined 

Has that air of responsibility to him, being a seasoned quester (and while his 3 doesn't stand to Legend’s 6, its still pretty sizable) hes looked up to by the younger campers

Time: child of Demeter Kronos? 

The Kokiri were so Demeter core dont even tell me they werent

I guess they’d kinda act like nymphs and dryads in a sense??

His abilities use to relate to his mother until the events of his first quest: the Ocarina of Time was designed to slowly corrupt the user, being a creation of Kronos’

However, it wasn’t really designed with a demigod in mind sooo…

Also self explanatory, the titan of time? Duh… huh?? what do you mean he was taken over?? What do you mean he was a child of Demeter?? No he wasnt lol that Neverrr happened

the reason he's the only “child” of a titan is mainly because of the fierce deity mask literally making him god-like, meaning he has a lot more power harbored in him sooo (the second he dawned that mask he discarded his old identity for that of a titan’s child, since it was also cursed object)

Don’t ask how he came to being Kronos’ kin, no one knows, not even he does (I do) (no, it does not imply a Hylian wandered into Tarturus and got out alive to have the baby)

Avoids interacting with the gods at all costs, he's weary of them as they are of him (even if he saved the world twice)

Extras :)

Ravio: child of Pluto 

blessed by Minerva for his natural quick witted nature and clever war strategies, if her own daughter can't succeed she might as well make sure ONE does

can tell if a rupee is real or not by glance alone

Sheerow scares the fuck out of the gods, which in turn means Ravio puts them on edge, a thing very few can achieve

the gods never gave him much thought until the events of albw, to which he suddenly gained like four pair of godly eyes on him

can and will plan one of the worlds most successful heists, refuses to participate 

also beefing with Ares (not Mars, Ares)

Based on my personal HC that Ravio’s some sort of artificer (be it replicating magic dungeon items or just flat out creating new ones) i think Vulcan has his eyes on him too

Hilda: child of Minerva 

by far the strangest child Minerva ever birthed

exemplifies the traits of a hero rather than a ruler

a little jealous her mother likes Ravio more than her

gods be damned, she's not going to let them neglect her kingdom anymore 

a force of fucking nature that single handedly forced a meeting with the gods and somehow forced them to agree to start restoring Lorule (she got the idea from Legend, who has done this multiple times for multiple different reasons)

[nick-writes-stuff]

Camping with the Demon Brothers

a/n: i got inspired to write this while i was on my own trip a week or so ago. this is my first time writing about obey me so i'm excited to see what you guys think!

notes: gn!reader, one use of "mc" in Beel's section, headcanons, intentional lowercase, there is some description of fire (idk if that should be a warning), literally just tooth-rotting fluff

Lucifer:

- you probably had to arrange some time off for Lucifer with Diavolo in order to convince him to come.

- he finds it hard to relax on the trip even though you have a strict "no work" policy on the trip.

- he helps to plan things and gather supplies for the trip to make sure you have anything you could possibly need

- will you need a 24 pack of ponchos on your weekend trip? no. do you have them? yes.

- he isn't very picky about what equipment you all have. he would prefer sleeping in a camper, but there is also something captivating about sleeping in a tent under the stars.

- also doesn't matter where you guys sleep, waking up in the mid-day with you in his arms is even better when there is no reason to rush out of bed.

- he would probably be into a lot of the traditional camping activities. hiking is definitely something he would enjoy.

- weirdly enough, he would probably enjoy fishing with you. it's a quiet activity to spend quality time together. and if you do well, you have something to brag about when you go back to the HoL.

- he's definitely baffled by the idea of campfire food. he's just not acquainted with the idea of cooking food on open flame and outdoors

- he's definitely the type to purposely let a marshmallow burn to a crisp because it "gives a good flavor"

- this man probably has the best stories to tell around the fire too

Mammon

- as much as he would complain that you were dragging The Great Mammon to stay in the dirty and scary woods, he would really enjoy camping

- at least for the first time you guys definitely have a camper. he already was on the fence about camping in general, there's no way he's sleeping on the ground in a tent

- you tried to get him into a hammock, but he said it reminded him too much of being strung up from the ceiling during lucifer's punishments.

- he made it a point to avoid feeding the wildlife, complaining lightheartedly if you do so because what if you get stuck in the woods and need that food to survive

- he probably ends up getting a whole new set of clothes beforehand because he doesn't want anything to ruin his clothes

- you guys would probably play a lot of board games. there's something exhilarating about bickering as loud as you want about monopoly because no one is there to hear it

- he would probably try to make hell sauce ramen over the fire, but he would also try the more traditional camping snacks too

- if he hears a noise suggesting that an animal is in the shadows, he will leave you behind and lock himself in the camper. of course, the Great Mammon was definitely not scared ~

- you two probably sit by the fire for a bit, watching the flames and the stars above you.

- if you fall asleep on him, his cheeks will turn red definitely because of the heat of the fire and he sits frozen for a second

- he doesn't want to move and wake you up. he wants the moment to last longer so it's ingrained in his memory.

- he eventually maneuvers you to the bed, giving you a kiss on the forehead before joining you.

Leviathan

- it's really hard for you to convince him to go camping. like going outside is one of his least favorite things so it'll take a lot

- you guys definitely have a camper rather than a tent. you also have a place on the counter for henry to stay with you guys

- you guys stay in that camper most of the time. it's air conditioned, bug free, and overall more comfortable.

- you guys probably have a canopy with screens enclosing it to keep the bugs out. that's the closest you'll be able to get him to going outside.

- if you made the food, he would probably like a good bit of campfire food, but you guys are definitely having other snacks

- you guys essentially do what you do in the house of lamentation. you guys play games and watch anime, just outside.

- you surprised him with a projector screen and an air mattress to be able to watch anime outside.

- while he still prefers an indoor viewing experience, there was something really special about being bundled up with you and watching it under the night sky.

- you guys actually fell asleep like that, something that made him blush when he woke up with you in his arms

- maybe you guys should do this more often.

Satan

- this man does so much research into the best places to stay in either the devildom or the human realm, and also what supplies you would need for the trip.

- he probably packs a ton of books to take, so hopefully you guys have room for half of a public library.

- he wouldn't really mind what the sleeping arrangements are

- being in nature with him is really fun because he's like a walking encyclopedia. you guys would be hiking and he suddenly begins identifying trees and plants.

- satan interacting with wildlife 😍

- seriously though while they aren't cats, he still loves trying to feed the animals (and he would obviously know what foods are safest)

- over the trip he feeds one specific squirrel to the point that by the end of your trip, he is able to feed it from his hand

- you love seeing his face light up when animals come towards him. it's hard to decide which is cuter, the small sparrow hopping toward him or your boyfriends reaction.

- CAMPFIRE STORIES WITH HIM ARE THE BEST

- whether it be scary stories, poetry, anything; this man is the best at captivating you.

- he does probably get annoyed by the lack of good lighting for reading though. sometimes it is too bright to read in the sunlight, but when it gets dark his eyes strain to see. probably has a lot of book lights.

Asmodeus

- is camping with asmo really considered camping?

- he takes glam-ping to an extreme.

- you guys definitely have one of the roomiest campers in existence

- like a queen sized bed, a bathroom big enough to handle asmo's skincare routine, and a nice kitchen

- it's also air conditioned, and he won't want to go camping if the weather is too bad or too cold

- applies sunscreen to himself and yourself obsessively. he wouldn't want either of your skin getting sunburned.

- going off the grid is definitely not going to happen. asmo is constantly snapping pics to post on devilgram

- he'll take pictures of anything. trees, flowers, animals, you.

- a lot of the traditional camping activities are off the table for him. anything that could get him dirty or ruin his clothes is a no go.

- he likes having picnics and sitting outside as long as there is a way to protect his clothes

- he also likes watching the wildlife from a distance. he'll leave some food out for the squirrels to watch them eat it

- the camper definitely has a skylight so you can watch the stars while you lie in bed.

Beelzebub

- going camping with beel means you have a lot to pack. 90 percent of it is food.

- he puts more effort into finding ways to protect the food from critters compared to actually packing stuff he would need for the trip.

- you guys go on a lot of hikes. walking through nature is always more fun then just working out in the gym.

- you guys definitely have a tent and air mattress situation.

- no matter the weather it's comfortable because you have fans if it's warm and if it's cold, you have a personal space heater and his name is beelzebub

- you guys have a campfire going almost constantly. guys imagine beel chopping wood

- beel tries to cook everything over the fire. popcorn. pizza. cookies. everything. because the smoke gives it a good flavor.

- at first he has a hard time sharing food with the wildlife, but after seeing your reaction to a chipmunk eating a peanut, he's willing to sacrifice a bite of his snack to see you smile again

- you show him campfire recipes from the human world.

- you show him what a real smore is, having it with actual marshmallows is completely different then what they have in the devildom

- you try to show him how to toast a marshmallow but he keeps eating the marshmallow off the stick

- however when he does finally make the smore he loves it

- after you have yours, he totally pulls the "hey MC, you have something right here" and kisses the melted chocolate off your lips

Belphegor

- basically, the only con to this trip of yours is that you will probably have to do most of the work to set up while your boyfriend takes a nap in the car.

- get ready for some sick naps

- obviously he would prefer to sleep in his own bed at the HoL, but he would be down to just go out for a weekend and not have the comfort of his home.

- you guys would probably have a tent with a clear roof/netted roof so you are sleeping under the stars. the mattress would probably be the best air mattress that grimm can buy

- HAMMOCK NAPS!! get a hammock that holds two and y'all could sleep for hours. there's something so soothing about feeling the breeze and gently rocking.

- as much as he would like to go on a hike to see the wildlife, that takes effort. he would absolutely watch the animals scurry around from comfort of a chair, however.

- the only time you guys aren't think about relaxing is in the dead of night. the area you are in is dark enough in the evening to go stargazing.

- belphie spends a good portion of the night telling you about different constellations.

- he keeps stealing glances at you. he thinks the look of awe on your face when finally understanding the shape of the constellations is adorable.

- you also keep stealing glances at him. hearing him talk about something he is passionate about is so attractive.

[trouble-clef]

Maybe i'm just too old now, but i cannot get myself to actually like this PJO show. Here's why. Feel free to disagree, these are just my thoughts.

The dialogue is not doing it for me. I know much of it is ripped straight from the book's pages, but while I love to read it, watching someone perform it just...it feels wooden.

While I love moments of all the characters, the only actor that's consistently selling it for me is Aryan Simhadri (Grover). Charlie Bushnell as Luke is a close second when he's not expositing the hell out of things. Walker and Leah are both just...really wooden and one note for me. They're kids, I know. I feel like they could really grow into these roles, but right now...yeesh. It's not awful, just not compelling. I was crazy excited for Leah Jeffries in particular, too!

Nothing about this show feels grand or epic. The minotaur fight was pretty underwhelming. There have been 3 fights: Fury, minotaur, Medusa. Percy defeated the Fury accidentally in about 20 seconds. Medusa walked around threateningly for 3 minutes before getting beheaded (although I did love the massive basement cave of statues! That made her seem a bit scary, actually). Minotaur was. Fine. The kids sit on a bus, run away from a Fury that doesn't actually seem to be chasing them (they look like they're taking a leisurely hike and we never actually see them running away), and after a not-fight, behead Medusa and then petrify Alecto (we see this from afar, for some reason? I know it's meant to represent Annabeth watching, but nothing about the shot communicates anything about how she might feel about what she's seeing).

I know they only have the 8 episodes but if any show deserves that old 22-26 episode run it's this one. Despite how fast paced the books are, we still get time to sit with the characters. There are 9 and a half chapters out of this 22 chapter book where we get to know Percy and the rest of the characters before embarking on this epic, death defying adventure with them. I don't feel like I know the show's Percy at all. He's boring. What makes show Percy a character? Who is he? The answer can be different from the book but it can't be nothing. Same with Annabeth. It's implied that she's this whip smart talented strategist and the most experienced camper, but I'm shown pretty much none of that. I, as a fan, know that Annabeth was using Percy as bait in capture the flag, but I feel like someone new to the franchise wouldn't get that.

The show spoon feeds everything to the viewer. In the books, Medusa is a mystery for a bit. They figure it out slowly. They almost get caught in her trap. Here, oh! It's Medusa, but be careful because Alecto is outside! I've not actually seen why Alecto is so dangerous. Percy accidentally stabbed Dodds the first time, so she was barely a threat then (compared to the books where it was an actual fight). The Furies have attacked maybe once and one of them got blown up in a way that basically registered as an accident. Alecto doesn't get a chance to show she's a threat before Medusa shows up to save them. Save them from the Fury we didn't get to see chasing them.

The show is Unfunny. Not just not funny, Unfunny. The books were filled with humor, and the tone of Percy's inner dialogue was often comedic in the less serious parts. Grover is really carrying the humor of the show on his back. (The Dionysus dad scene was funny, though, but I'm letting out a chuckle every like...hour at most here).

Now, about future things to come/being set up:

-Percy is supposed to be a good fighter generally, but he also draws power from water specifically. This is important when he fights Ares on the beach (which we know is coming and I'm praying will be epic). This is established during the capture the flag fight in the books but not here. We have seen approximately 0 fights since that point and if the show keeps going, we won't see any, so when will this get established?

-Luke is supposed to be disarmingly awesome in the book so as to make the betrayal all the more shocking. Again, where those first 9 chapters come in. I don't think we've seen enough of him to make it hurt like it should. (Again, really like Charlie as Luke, just we aren't seeing enough of him)

-so...Gabe is goofy now. Which on the one hand I really like, but on the other it doesn't feel like he'll deserve the petrification at the end. He's not terrible and abusive, just lazy and a little irritating. (Nice touch making him the prophecy though, made me chuckle)

Things i like so this isn't a total Debbie Downer:

-peter johnson

-"he knows your name." "Does he, though?"

-"can you please tell them to put the hot peppers on my sandwich"

-Dionysus the "i'm totally your dad" wine god

-not even seeing a hint of non-exiled Olympians until the end of episode 3 (makes them feel like the distant immortal beings that they are)

-Lin Manuel Miranda jumpscare

-Blackjack!

-camp halfblood. Looks awesome, appropriately massive and epic.

-wheelchair user camp counselor (love me some disability rep)

-grover is an adorable delight

-medusa is Soooooooo pretty

[almacambiondaughterofsaleos]

Emberlynn what did she do? Was she Satanist? Bully someone until they... Another person was the drowned camper what did they do. This was suddenly you could do to make Heaven grey. Maybe Heaven has gotten more strict with who it lets him. We can say the same with Husk as he just grumpy old drunk but out of Hazbin sinner is the most good. He did things in hell but that was after death.

This. She was overtly horney no implications she even driven anyone to suicide by feeding with them. As you said this is a better way to show heaven being overtly strict.

[blubushie]

Dad's bringing Mattie to the grease monkeys today cuz she needs an oil change (and I can't go because someone needs to watch the house, and I look young so mechanics always try to bilk me).

It's about 9am when he goes to start her up.

She doesn't start.

He keeps trying. She doesn't start. He pulls the choke, maybe it's the chill from last night? No start. Her engine turns over and roars, and then three seconds later it dies. All further attempts and she won't turn over at all. What the fuck?

He calls me out. "Come look at this." We troubleshoot for about 15. Can't figure out the problem. He tries to start her again. I smell petrol and signal him to call quits—overloaded the fuel line. I pop the bonnet, take off the air filter, set that in the grass and let the fuel line and engine and carb vent out the fumes. We wait for the smell to dissipate.

Five minutes later the smell's gone. I get in to see if I can start her—it's been 30 something years since Dad's driven a manual choke, but I drove one just last year in the freezing outback winter, an '87 Holden. And I learnt to drive in a '67 Mustang, manual choke. Sure, I totalled that car, but it wasn't related to the choke at all. Maybe Dad's just doing it wrong.

I pull the choke. Dad confirms from up front that the choke is working. I keep the choke closed, turn the ignition, and tap the accel. She doesn't start.

What the fuck? She was running like a beast yesterday!

I get out. While I get out I happen to look down and I see the manual fuel lever. And it's facing the door.

See, Mattie's a 1968 Ford F250 Camper Special. The Camper Special is made to carry a jackoff camper in the tray. Naturally, it has two tanks for petrol because the added weight is hell on the engine, one tank in the cab under the seat, and one tank in the tray. Now, normally you'd switch tanks from the switch on the dash, but as we've established nothing electrical in her really wants to work, and that includes the switch in the dash. So instead you have to use the emergency backup lever below the seatbelt feeder on the floor of the driver's side, next to the door. If the lever points forward it feeds from the cab tank, if the lever points backwards it feeds from the rear tank.

But the lever was pointing sideways, toward the driver's door. I'd suggested doing this last night as a hypothetical manual fuel shuftoff switch, something people often install on classic cars (or expensive modern cars) to prevent the cars from being stolen. If you run the car with the switch enabled, the only petrol the engine gets is whatever is left in the fuel line. You'll get about a metre before the engine dies. Now, theoretically, the tank switch should work the same way if it's rigged how I think it is—forward opens the front tank valve but closes the back, backwards opens the rear tank valve but closes the front, and sideways... either opens both, or closes both.

Turns out, it closes both. Cuz I got back in, reached down and flipped the lever forward, and turned the ignition. Tapped the accel and she roared up without issue—didn't even need to use the choke.

We sabotaged my truck and both of us ADHD idiots completely forgot we'd sabotaged the truck, so we spent 35 minutes trying to troubleshoot an issue WE caused despite there actually not being any problem at all besides our own forgetfulness.

I feel like a bloody idiot but at least we know the lever is effective theft prevention!

[wildlygay]

JNP Fire Patrol - INCIDENT REPORT (1)

(This is apart of my TFP grimdark au, love cryptic horrors and so my blog will get a few snippets of this! Got it from my google docs.)

WARNING: Viewing this file without proper authentication will result in action taken by the Nevadan National Guard, hacking into this file is punishable by law. 

Log 1: Jun. 12, 2011 - Officer Mitch arrived at Watch Tower 1 in Jasper National Park, he seemed naturally skeptical of the infamy of that tower held. Those rumors about a beast resting underneath the tower like a makeshift nest, taking hikers and fellow watch guards for some reason. 

Some thought the beast was eating them, others thought that the beast was turning them into beasts themselves, the fates of the missing hikers and staff members are uncertain. Mitch took the summer job due to the high pay, and as a stress relief. I mean, who wouldn’t want to take in the view of Jasper’s gorgeous national park?

Log 2: Jun. 18, 2011 - Settled in well without issues, he got a hang of doing the weather reports and stopping any would-be campers from entering past curfew relatively quickly. The following is a transcript between Officer Mitch, and the watch guard for Tower 2, who shall not be named for privacy concerns.

Watch guard two hung up after a short call with guard two referring Mitch to a training video to explain the new security system, and Officer Mitch watched the training video. He managed to access the security feed, watching through the footage. He is a bit worried of the ‘something’ that was mentioned not being able to shake off the feeling that he’s in danger, but no other negative feelings are reported.

It’s encouraged that Watchtower guards write their negative feelings in physical journals or the online diary that’s on the computer. We look over the logs weekly and see if they’re stable enough to continue working. 

Log 3 - Jun. 25, 2011: Mitch has not been reporting for the daily weather reports, and Watchtower guard 2 reported seeing Mitch leaving his station at midnight on June 24th, holding the shotgun. The ‘shotgun’ is an emergency weapon used in case of a feral creature, a cybertronian, and or him. We are unsure of how Mitch figured this out, but it has not been determined yet. 

The bullets are made out of dark energon, as it’s proven that it’s very efficient in disarming them, and weakening them. Mitch is considered lost, however, security footage says otherwise. BIOHAZARD WARNING: The following footage is considered to have contingent effects on those who view it, watch at your own risk. If you are infected, please contact Agent Fowler. 

The only thing available is the audio, but that alone is unsettling. There are noises, and Mitch goes down to the bottom of the watchtower, with the shotgun. “What the hell are you?” (Unintelligible growling)   “Oh god, that’s a corpse.. What are you doing with a corpse?”

“Are you fucking licking it? It’s dead, that’s not even living anymore!”

(The growling gets more defensive as it lunges at Mitch, the sounds of the shotgun being used are heard, then a sickening crunch noise.)

(But he seems… Happy? There’s the sounds of dragging, and a loud purr. A deep voice can be heard.)

“New ... toy.”

From the context clues, Mitch is disgusted at the sight of him licking a dead corpse, presumably in a maternal manner. Like how a little girl would take care of a baby doll. 

When Mitch is viewed as a threat by seemingly triggering him when he exclaimed how the ‘doll’ was a corpse, hence a dead body, the entity attacks him, hence the missed shotgun shots, and it crushed him to death. 

But the entity, in a sick twist, seems to view Mitch as a new toy. Presumably excited to get a new human doll with a cute uniform to play with. It’s clear he doesn’t know the difference between a toy and a human corpse. This contradicts with our earlier reports, as it’s reported that he’s much more violent. This information could be wrong however, as one of the reports was proven to be falsified.

[cupidsdescendant]

Mercs helping with period cramps! (Part 2)

Hiya babes <3! I hope you all are having a happy holiday! If u don’t celebrate Christmas I hope you have a happy whatever-day!💗💗💗💗 thank you for all the support I’ve been getting on my last posts I appreciate it beyond words!

Pyro:

-clueless but considerate

-when he sees you struggling they try to help however he can

-pryo sees the world different from her view so whenever she sees you hurt or bleeding she believes that your period is a real life devil stabbing you

-yes ik it’s sorta weird but this is how I imagine pyros mind handling things

-usually he’ll punch the air as you lay on the floor or chop the wind believing they’re saving you

-you tell them to relax ! Explaining your menstrual cycle yourself to him in the simplest terms

-you give pryo a small list of what you need and he agrees

-he gets all the things you need in the…maybe more violent ways by killing the workers at the market in retaliation or not getting the stuff for free

-you know she loves you tho <3 and he tries his best!

Sniper:

-a respect full lad, but he doesn’t help much

-he doesn’t really know how to and he could care less

-“Dontcha got arms? You can get this yourself, mate” he says as he focuses on his rifle

-instead you insist he gets you things so he can visit you more often and hang out

-Spy him in the head after he saw Sniper ask if he was okay

-“YOU FOOL!” Spy says as he points to snipers chest and pushes him back a little

-“What the bloody hell is wrong with you, mate?!!” He says in retaliation

-spy gives him a lecture about being considerate to a woman and respectful blah blah and sniper reluctantly agrees

-Sniper legit tries but never gets the hang of it, he helps out in all sorta ways but it’ll always be wrong

-Months go by like this and Sniper always dreads when it’s your cycle because he feels bad he can never be the best for you

-“I can shoot at attah things” Sniper says as he shoots off the head of a Scout “but I cant finish the shot at this thing, doc.”

-Sniper begged Medic to come up to his camper to talk about it, reluctantly Medic listens

-Medic also teaches him how to be proper (spy also helps too lol) but after hours and days of training it’s no use

-Sniper will always tell you how much he loves you when he messes up at it and that he’ll try again next time, so rlly it’s the thought that counts <3

Engineer:

-Engi is already a sweet man and he’s even sweeter when you’re on your cycle

-he understands despite not having any experience with it before and he’s a wonderful listener

-he gets you everything you need no matter what, he gets them quickly!

-Engi will try to make devices to stop your cycle (all of them failing) but when you’re in bed with cramps he’ll sketch and write about a new design

-“it’s okay, pumpkin. This one will work I have a good feeling-!” He says as he kisses your cheek

-he feeds you southern dishes and foods in bed <33

-“uh ahuh-..uhm hello, darling..” Engi says nervously, he’s sweating like crazy and his entire face is red

-“yes Engi? Is something a matter?”

-“well..you see I have an ..idea for uhm..an “invention” he says with quotation marks “well it’s been done-e. befor-e.. but uh i’d like to customize it to fit you-..so I would-..l-like some measurem-ents…”

-“oh of course! What do ya need measured” Y/N says back with a warm smile

-“Uhm. I would need to-..measure your uh.. “ he clears his throat and whispers

“Your hoo-ha-“

“HE MEANS YA PUSSY!” Scout screams out as he laughs as a shook Engi

“WILL YOU GET OUT BOY!” Engi angrily yells back with

-You find out that Engineer wanted to measure your uh..yeah..so then he could make you a custom period cup

-you agree and in the end he makes it and gives it to you in a little bag with a bow

-“I’m very sorry, pumpkin. I should’ve been a lot more ..uh..better with the way I acted.”

-you kiss Engi on the cheek “it’s okay you didn’t do anything wrong. Thank you, hon”

Welp that’s all folks ! It’s currently 2:22 (make a wish <3) and I would love to sleep now from a long day. I hope you all stay safe and have a good day! Mwah! XOXOXO (part 3 will be out soon!)

[thecluelessdoctor]

Unhappy Campers is indeed a disgrace of an episode and made me hate both Moxxie and Millie even though I used to love them both and their relationship before it. What are your thoughts on it?

Oh my god someone who agrees.

I was already pretty wonky on how much I liked M and M, but after unhappy campers it just put a weird taste in my mouth.

So many things about their relationship were forced for plot reasons that never get addressed, and are suddenly fixed because of one shitty apology from Moxxie.

Like we had ZERO signs of Millie having depression!! Nothing!! And in a show like this, thats something you need to at least make watchers think is a possibility!! And then, even after Millie basically says she has depression and mentally is really bad, Moxxie does NOTHING!!! NOTHING. not until Millies stupid big show that had no plot relevance what so ever, where makes a shitty apology, and Millie immediately forgives him!! Yes I understand you shouldn't hold grudges, but this was a serious thing!! Moxxie was being selfish (which is REALLY out of character) and being a complete asshole! It kinda sucks too because a line in Moxxie's song in the final of season one was 'i'll never take you for granted' and what does he do?? Take her for granted!! But the thing is, the show didn't show this as bad, feeding into it even more!!

The episode in general sucked from the horrible, horrible jokes, to poor writing, to plot, it just sucked.

Another thing that makes me so mad about this episode is how it completely sweeps what the hell happened to Stolas under the rug!! Like in the beginning I originally thought Blitz was breaking into the hospital Stolas' was in!! That would have made for something interesting if they keep wanting to feed into stolitz!! Personally I don't think stolitz should be a thing, at least not in the way how Helluva boss is trying to make it happen. It feels way to forced, and it's incredibly wrong because Stolas as a person and character is HORRIBLE.

Or! If they REALLY wanted the whole barbie plot line, THEY SHOULD HAVE FOCUSED THE EPISODE ON BLITZ. Moxxie and Millie did not need to be in this episode! All they needed to do is have blitz send them on a solo mission as a explanation for why they weren't there.

Anyway, overall this episode put a really bad taste in my mouth so now I want to watch m and m fall. Well I've been wanting to watch their relationship get worse because depth

I swear I'ma rewrite the episode that how much I hate it

[letmetellyouaboutmyfeels]

Fic Status 2: Electric Boogaloo

Now that I’ve finished my Halloween fics (a moment of silence for the official death of my sanity) I decided to make a new pinned post just to keep people updated on my writing.

I am now including my original novels on this list because it's my list and I do what I want.

AND THE DESCENTS INTO MADNESS PROJECTS ARE:

Original Works:

Finish revising Horsemen: Pestilence and send to my beta editor. - FINISHED

Revise Brand of a Witch and send to other editor so she can feed it to her younger sister like watching one of those camper trash cans be tested by the bears at the bear sanctuary. - FINISHED

Finish the first draft of A Masque of Shadows (chapters currently being shared with my patrons on Patreon then posted a week later on Ao3). - FINISHED

Xedgin Fanfiction:

Alexa, Play "I Won't Say I'm in Love" from Hercules - 25k written, oh god, h e l p - FINISHED

Established Relationship Dungeon Crawl from Hell - 8k written, don't ask

Monsterfucking PWP - FINISHED

Buddie Fanfiction:

Fast & Furious AU - in progress, 3k written

Platonic Sugar Baby AU (blame @catdadeddie for this one)

Star Trek AU (blame @extasiswings and Strange New Worlds for this one)

Feel free to send me asks about my original novels by the way, if that's something you guys are into. I love talking about absolutely unhinged war criminal queer women my lovely precious protagonists. I promise, none of them bite.

All right fine Matthias and Frisco don't bite, the rest of them do.

Okay, public accountability out of the way, off into the ether I go again. Mwah.

[spacepiratenemo]

WANTED: Lunaliel Nemo ☠

⚠Due to formatting the full version might get weirdly cropped by Insta; I’ll post that to my story & add it to a highlight though⚠

Boooya! Nemo’s bounty develops over time, starting with 250 Mil; rising to 442 Mil, and ultimately ending up with 1 Billion after the TS. The government's reasoning? Nemo is a dangerous terrorist distributing weapons of mass destruction. LOL: Like… the gamepad, ya sayin’? Or the headset, bro? Fine, alright, admittedly her guns are dangerous and she can build the means of mass destruction, but no one ever considers that she doesn’t pull triggers unless she has to!…Or you said that “cute” word to her *sighs* And mass destruction? Seriously? Yes, there are weapons of such calibre that were built by her, but these are means to defend the solar system from interstellar invasions; an emergency precaution in case a highly developed hostile species were to cause harm. So - how about a damn “thank you” to the Mech from outer space, aye?! 😂

What people might misunderstand, possibly so due to Nemo’s bad temper, is that she is actually rather peace loving. That’s why it pisses her off if you tryna piss her off, duh!! Her dreams include the interstellar travel-net, alongside other projects such as the local dyson sphere. Free energy for everyone, a highway allowing anyone to travel among the stars and visit other planets, cultured farms on habitable and uninhabited rocks that could feed people real food, and bloody hell - have some good old adventures. ✨

The only real threat is that Nemo could expose all of their dirty secrets; and maybe this also is the true reason behind the massive raise after roughly a year.

Her bounty on the local gaming cloud is drastic though; exceeding a few trillion points of terror. This cheeky mouse is also known as a camper’s nightmare, a cheater’s horror and a master of button-smashin’! 🖤👾

[slocumjoe]

ive been asked about this in a few different flavors, so uhhh general idea of what my modern au is like, when I write abt a modern setting this is the framework I work from

Cait; Came from an abusive shack in the Irish countryside, ran away from home at a young age. Fell in with a bad fucking crowd. Eventually got enough money from said crowd to get a plane over to 'Merica. Went over to follow her dream of becoming a pro-wrestler. Instead, ended up as a bartender/bouncer for a shitty nightclub above a fightclub of questionable legality. She only occasionally gets to fight in it, but its on her days off. Of which, she has few, and would rather spend resting. She lives in a small, shitty truck camper, but genuinely favors it to her previous living arrangements. Once she kicks her drug addiction, gets a new job at a high-end gym as a trainer. The sense of community is good for her, and she's, surprisingly, a good hypegirl. She eventually gets herself a C-model RV, on the smaller side, but comfy as hell for the right kind of person. Well, Cait's that kind of person. Her main hobby is just exercise, something to keep her physically and mentally busy. After colliding with Danse on corners one too many times, they both said 'fuck it' and just starting planning their morning runs together. Mostly so Danse stopped breaking his nose on Cait's forehead.

Codsworth; British-Indian man who is well known throughout high-end hospitality industries. He's worked at hotels, country clubs, restaurants, designer stores, if there is a position where you move with utmost efficiency and sympathy for the customer, Codsworth has worked it. You walk into the most exclusive businesses in the city, chances are, they've at least heard of him. As he got older, settled down to open his own little Cafe. It's a casual, early-morning affair, and its really just an excuse to have tea and biscuits with people, chat. It's kind of a hole in the wall, off the beaten path, but those who know of it swear on their life for his coffee, tea, and breakfast/brunch. Codsworth himself, when he isn't tending the cafe, can be found feeding the birds in the park, cleaning up litter throughout the town, or tending the public gardens as a volunteer. He lives a quiet, but quaint life, and is always lending an ear, a shoulder, advice, or in some cases, criticism. Always keeps a coffee, quiche, and croissant aside for Piper, Nick, and Preston; his problem children who rarely sleep and always forget to eat.

Curie; A traveling doctor, who travels from hospital to hospital only because she's too competent and revered to not share amongst as many medical institutions as possible. Even the most egotistical doctors cower beneath her. Being corrected or criticized by Dr. Curie Collins is a black mark on any medical professional's record. When she isn't saving lives or scolding a haughty doctor, Curie can be found in a lovely cottage on the bank of the Charles. She grows most of her own food, but if her pantry is filled with strawberry twinkies and Milano cookies, that's her business. She wants to go into psychology and become a therapist, but she doesn't trust her fellow medical doctors enough to leave her patients with them. She frequents Codsworth's cafe, usually in attendance after an all-nighter at work. She's the doctor that partially oversaw Danse's diagnosis and upon learning of the consequences, yanked all the strings she could to get him another job. Wanted to raise hell over his unethical/illegal discharging, but Danse refused. Often has coffee with X, they share stories of their respective doctors and scientists and whatnot being stupid and incompetent.

Danse; raised in foster care alongside Cutler. They joined the military the moment they turned 18. Cutler became a pilot, Danse infantry. Their C.O, Krieg, became an adoptive father to them both. Cutler's helicopter was shot down in the line of duty, and when Danse and his team made it to the wreck, everyone was dead, or doomed to die. Danse mercy-killed Cutler. Krieg died shortly after, across the ocean. Eventually, his superiors wanted him to get a mental exam, which led him to Curie's hospital, where one of her colleagues diagnosed him with the expected PTSD and the unexpected autism. A superior who had bad blood for him leveraged the ASP diagnosis to medically discharge him. Seeing as Danse had literally nothing but his work, and was still reeling from losing his family, this was...not great. Ends up back in Curie's hospital, brought in by Nick, who wasn't even on duty, just drove past a guy on a bridge, looking down at the Charles too long. Danse eventually finds work as a ship mechanic down at the harbor, and moves into an apartment nearby. Sounds cozy, right? No. Theres a dispensery across the street that's constantly filled with hooligans, and the owner keeps slipping flyers under his door.

Deacon; U.S Marshal Service. If you're unfamiliar, he works in witness protection. Wouldn't know it by looking at him, though. He keeps his work very hush-hush. If you're not a coworker, you don't know what he does. He'll even find jobs just to drop them in a week, just for the chaos of it all. Deacon lives in a few different small apartments across Massachusetts, mostly because he hates hotels. The only people likely to ever pick him out are convention, renfaire, or other costume party attendees, or special fx workers. Why is he working in a costuming depart—never mind, he quit again. He lives a life that on the surface, is bizarre and crazy, but at closer look, has some kind of method to the madness. Deacon also has the odd habit of bringing up things about people that he has no reason to know. Divorcing? He knows before anyone else. Pregnant? Knows. Cheating on your spouse? He knows, and whoops, guess who also knows, now! Deacon is buddy to all, friend to none, and enemy to many. Joins Preston's camping trips as a different person every time, and its seriously creeping the dude out. The one time X joined, on a whim, ran through the woods back to his car. Nope. Nope!

Gage; Raised in a crime-infested neighborhood in the south, became a criminal himself. Spent most of his youth doing it, until he and his whole gang got sold out and busted. Gage spent five years in prison, and afterwards, decided other criminals were too fucking stupid and unpredictable to work with anymore. Instead, he turned his eyes to the real life-sucking evil; capitalism. Weaseled his way into working at a theme park, starting as a handyman and somehow ending at manager. The owner, Colter, is a flaming dipshit, and the three assisting managers are cartoonishly evil and/or stupid. He isn't sure he hates this job, because fuck if it ain't entertaining. Colter eventually dies trying to fistfight a mom in the bumper cars arena, electrocuting himself on a faulty wire. Gage lives in a boathouse on the river, despite making the money to live elsewhere. Drives a truck slapped together with gum and recycled tupperware. Has a pet lizard. Keeps to himself. His truck smokes like an active volcano, so he's something of a road cryptid, and often gets pulled over by Preston, since he often has to drive in Preston's area. They've gotten into so many brawls on the side of the road it's become something of a smoke break. It's not even professional or personal. It's just what they do. Sometimes they get lunch after.

Hancock; Came from a rich family, daddy was a senator. A shitty one. Brother is also similarly shitty, and became a landlord. As for Hancock, he raised himself on the other side of the tracks, making a name for himself as a vocal activist and infamous heathen against the establishment. No one has ever been able to arrest him or take him to court, because Johnny became a lawyer. And he's a fucking good one. The only person who can represent himself and consistently win. At some point the local gov gave up trying to shut him down, and focus on just...not pissing him off. When he isn't harassing politicians, Hancock owns a dispensery, though he prefers harder substances. Buddies with MacCready but neither of them remember how they met. Also familiar with Cait, used to go drinking at her bar and fighting in the pit. Less buddies with her, their relationship is more one of them calling the other, and updating on how a trashfire is burning. His gossip girl, if you will. As for Danse...you call the cops on his party, fine. But that fucker had the nerve to correct Hancock when he was quoting a historical figure. But when he Googled, it, big asshole was right. So, its personal now, and Hancock will not rest until he or Danse dies, or Danse gets laid/high and becomes cool.

MacCready; Security guard for a mall. Gets bounced around the different shops/sections, so he's picked up a lot of odd skills, knowledge, and tricks. Can make pretzels good enough to kill God, but also can identify every variety of makeup sold in Sephora. Has never stopped a lifter and never will, and no one has ever mentioned it. The only time he's done his job is if someone is in danger; you're not stabbing the 60 year old Barnes N Noble cashier. You got caught, you give up. Don't fucking attack Ms. Daisy over earrings. Mac hates a sore loser. Eats nothing but whatever is sold in the mall. That dadbod is 60% Panda Express and 40% Orange Julius. Mac has a tiny house in a decent enough neighborhood, by Duncan's school. Lucy died in a car accident, run off the road by a drunk driver. Bobby makes life work, and Duncan is a happy kid, but he's never really...processed anything. Always shaking from anxiety. Employs Piper as his star babysitter, as she works from home. Met her after she interviewed him, reporting on an armed robbery attempt. Hancock is the babysitter only when Piper is busy, because even though he's good with the kid, and Duncan loves his Uncle John, Hancock is not what MacCready considers a...ideal influence...Duncan came home with a fascination with knives one day.

Nick; Detective, obviously. Was kinda...demoted...? After his fiance got killed. Used to handle the biggest cases, but now he's more of a patroler, works the simple disputes. Goes to the less-violent, more cold-cut scenes. The boss thought he could do with a lighter, easier load. Nick kind of hates it, feels really underutilized, but fuck it, it's not that bad. If he were younger, he'd be fuming, but as it stands, he can't complain too much about getting the easy, simply work, that doesn't have him staying up all week. He lives in the Old Town part of the city, likes his scenery vintage. Nick lives simply, until he has a day off. His day off, Nick is getting into all kinds of shit. Maybe its his nature. Maybe its bad luck. He chases purse snatches through sewers. He settles generational family rivalries over a bad cow sale centuries prior. He tears apart apartments to find underwear to prove to a trusting wife her husband is a cheat. Nick finds himself, constantly, in the eye of a batshit storm, but only when he's off duty. He's the kinda guy whose best stories come from his everyday life, rather than his hectic and often surprising/dramatic work. If he isn't working, or getting sucked into chaos, Nick stays home, pours himself a drink of some kind, and relaxes with a good book. Sits on the porch and watches the birds. Feeds the neighborhood cats. Its not often he has downtime, and rarer still that he uses it for anything exciting. Occasionally on the phone with Piper and Preston, tries to provide some old man advice for them. Checks in on Danse occasionally for welfare, just doing his job. His presence makes the party across the street mind their manners.

Piper; English major who landed a good, but difficult job as a journalist for the newspaper. Her life is constantly moving, always hectic, and never chill. Has been arrested more times than Hancock. Has been thrown out of a military base more times than Danse. This frightens Danse and impresses Hancock. Piper keeps her job remote to take care of Nat, basically an octopus, multitasking five different things at any time. Her dad was a firefighter who died when his captain got cold feet and left his team to die, and she's made it her life goal to publicly shame such actions and people. Someone up top fucks up, Piper is screaming it from the rooftops and all of the city will hear. She's a menace in a different way from Hancock, though they've shared a slammer enough times to give tips on various vigilante methods. Piper attends an online class, and often does her work through phone or laptop while running around doing other shit. Watching her is exhausting. She likes her life but can't wait to graduate. Really hates her schooling, but she needs it to do what she wants, so that's how the cookie crumbles. When she gets a chance to relax, she's taking a long bubblebath, and shutting off her phone. It's kind of hard to get a hold of Piper, and even harder to keep her there.

Preston; Forest ranger/trooper. Much of his work is babysitting the populace, rather than dealing with them after they've misbehaved. He's the guy going into the woods to bust illegal bonfire parties, or poachers, that kind of thing. Sometimes he gets road patrol, sometimes he gets desk work. Sometimes he does community work, like seminars and camping trips. Preston doesn't mind his job, very passionate actually, he just kinda...lost all faith in humanity at some point. You see enough people at their worst, that happens. A forest fire broke out a few years back that fucked up a town, started by some shitty rebels without a cause just looking for trouble. He never quite got over the fact that he didn't find the source and stop it in time. He's young enough that he doesn't get that he can't save everything, but old enough to have failed a few times. It's a rough combo. Preston lives near the Charles, close enough to know that Gage definitely isn't certified to have his boathouse or dock it where it is. Considers Gage his mortal enemy whom will die upon his own death. For they exist solely to annoy the other. When he and Gage aren't fighting in a ditch, Preston is either at home, facedown on his floor, or curled up like a crumpled tissue on one of Codsworth's couches, half-heartedly gnawing on a quiche. He's known for falling asleep in odd places all over the city, catching some Z's when he has a second.

X6-88; A security guard for the C.I.T. He wears a suit and sunglasses and always has an earpiece in. His face would shatter should it emote. He's an alumni who graduated from the C.I.T but no one has ever figured out when, or what he majored in. There are theories as to what his name is. He just calls himself by his badge designation. It's a running joke that he's a robot but it stopped being a joke pretty quickly, because honestly? Probably is. X revels in being an engima, and goes out of his way to be mysterious and spooky. During an...incident, at the C.I.T, X worked partially with Deacon, as the latter was handling a witness. X freaked the fuck out of him by immediately recognizing him from several other cases Deacon has worked. X pays attention to local legal proceedings, you see, so he's up to date. Either way, Deacon was approached by a massive breach in security and now lives in fear of the Terminator who's always watching his extremely confidential work. X also works with Preston, occasionally, when dorm parties get too crazy. X doesn't keep to himself, not really, its just that people don't notice him. He's always in the loop. Piper begs him for an interview with anyone in C.I.T. He directs her to the Wikipedia page for the college. If he isn't working or freaking people out, X is cleaning house at local bakeries and confectioners, often with Curie. It's the only time you can see him in public if he isn't working.

[yandepostal-fanfic]

YandePOSTAL - Chapter 1

"The Gas Station"

The child had become a Woman.

Traveling through ins-&-outs of snow, Emira was raised by her Godfather, John Murray. From Russia to Japan, Emira drove a Small Red Camper Van that John had gifted her some few years ago, in search of the Devil who stole her family. Occasionally, during her travels, Emira would stop by random bars & start entire brawls if she felt like it. Little did she know that before her lay a dangerous road of Crime & Bloodshed.

—

“Almost there…” Emira whispers as she fuels up her van. “There we go, all fueled up!”

Emira walked into the Convenience store at the Gas Station, to stock up on food & supplies. The establishment was settled near a River, so the air smelled - needless to say, refreshing.

Before she was able to sit back down in her Van & drive on her way, she hears a faint snarling sound that she knew a tad too well. Emira follows the sound with her eyes & finds a Feathered Saurian Beast - about the Size of a Large Dog & resembling a Raven with an Axe-Shaped Snout.

“Kekekeke~! It's really you!” The Raptor spoke “Your days shall conclude, Postal-Chan!”

This Raptor is what Emira referred to as a Tengu, one of the many types of Demonic Yokai Dinosaurs that Emira had grown used to fighting. What many of them failed to complete when Emira was a child, these Beasts sought to do better & finish.

After using her Shotgun to force-feed lead to many of the Tengus, some more Yokai emerged from the nearby River - Feathered, Armored Hadrosaurs with Bright Aqua Plumages on their heads. These were the Kappas.

Through Emira’s struggle, she became stronger & learned more to fight well.

Emira grabbed a Cucumber from one of her grocery bags & taped a Firecracker to it before throwing it near the Kappas. The Kappas became distracted, due to their love of Cucumbers, but soon met an Explosive end.

Just when Emira thought she could get in her van & drive away, the thundering footsteps of an Oni-Rex approached, making it's presence even more known by swinging its clubbed tail around & knocking down multiple trees. Emira, however, was prepared anyway, so she reaches into her trunk & pulls out her favorite weapon - her Katana, which she had spent much of her life learning to use.

The Oni-Rex attempts to Chomp & stomp Emira to Hell, but she was too nimble & continued to Slash at the Beast - strangely in a way that a circle of lacerations was forming on either side of the Oni-Rex's body.

Emira, in the midst of the brawl, felt like both a Gladiator & the judge, as she always came out triumphant in every Fight with these monsters.

Emira manages to catch the clubbed tip of the Oni-Rex's tail before it could crush her. She then starts to crawl onto the beasts tail, as it begins thrashing around for her to fall off. Emira slashes the Oni-Rex's Tail off & then uses the Clubbed tip to smash a hole into the beast's body & leave a bloody Torso-Plug on the ground, like one Anomalously Clean Chunk.

The Beast collapses, & the Owner of the Gas Station appears to see Emira at the river with her Sword, a Towel, & a homemade Blade-Cleaning solution.

“Holy shit kid, that was awesome! Now I'm pretty sure I've seen everything!” The store owner exclaimed. “That shouldn't even be possible at all, since that's a whole damn Dinosaur that you put a clean hole in its body & left its stomach plug on the ground back there!”

“Yeah, cool. Old man, i need to-” Emira wanted the man to calm down, but he kept going.

“Shit, What about all the Body organs & skeleton? I'm not a doctor, but it should be widely known that's way too clean of a-” the Store owner was then interrupted.

“OLD MAN, I GET WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, HURRY UP!” Emira Shouted.

“Ah shit sorry. Actually before you go…” The Old Man reached under his Desk & gifted Emira a box containing an M1 Garand Rifle with a Silencer & some Ammo. “Seeing you with that Shotgun was pretty cool, so here's this Rifle. I never knew if I would actually use it, since I already have a Crossbow, so I'm giving it to you!”

Emira gladly accepted the Rifle & went on her way.

[the-firebird69]

There are a lot of people dying our son is a little nervous and so these people aren't that about to defense the clothes will have to be traded on and they're pain in the ass.

--so there are going to be some deficits is not true these trumpsters are out and basically threatened our son so much that they became absolutely useless VGA is still kind of doing that and getting his ass handed to him and there's a lot of people dying here are the numbers keep going up and our son and daughter thought that it would they literally they said I think they it's just going to go through the roof they're all ready to go and they're losing power and they don't have ships and they're losing the influence in the cities and they're dying faster and faster and it's starting to show it's going on right now that they are dwindling very quickly and soon will be gone they're going to try this terrorist effort and it will probably happen to all the way down to the 800 ft caverns and people are calling after them already every community has them and they don't want them in them or married and they can use it the big ones have huge machines gathering and stuff it's going to be a hell of a day as when the city's cordon off in the east I am close in the warlock the evacuate to their crappy cities either way the power loss will be significant and the death rate here increases it's going to continue all day long and they're according to be some changes taking place here fairly soon and we can estimate it

--and it's true my estimates are within a week or so and it is working a lot of what I said was working would work is working it is terrific. The largest amount of change is coming from this apartment and who's managing it and who owns it the rest of the pseudo empire is taking it over they said it yesterday at lunch and Mack Daddy's said you have to be kidding me you f*** my whole Plan up. And it went on for a while that they were arguing after the Olive garden and Stan started to say he doesn't deserve anything and Max said you watch your f****** mouth you're the one causing this problems and and back hurt do you want to be a lawyer and you'll get a bird's eye view of this guy he said to him later hey Maxine what do you mean I said he is a huge huge pyrea he's young and he's not only making errors because he's Young but he is just sitting there feeding everybody to everybody their head and everyone can hear it and I don't know if he's the center of this jackass storm or not so max said that's a good idea and he's going to open up lawsuits here on them is going to help cuz this is terrible and even John remillard is saying well that's pretty good and things like that about his not right tell me if too and he's been talking to him and stuff he says it's good so we got wind at that and that's coming down the pike that they're taking over they will then remove these two idiots they're having a war with them after that there are. In the meantime they're writing orders to stan to evict I will see how it goes stand right because he's under a fierce attack and he can keep him out of his house and he's going to do that too and the guy has a camper there I mean this is a ridiculous stuff these people put up with us some s*** from people harming them is ridiculous I've never seen anything so stupid and it's gross no matter what the situation they're wrong. That's one thing that is going to start that ball is rolling the orders will come out if he doesn't do it they're going to take over the apartment.

--John remillard is planning on leaving yeah and coming back and he wants to open up all these Chambers and causes a disaster and then he wants to open the ones in the glades and fix it won't explode it's going on pretty soon and he's going to get creamed along with this men

-other things to watch out for changes in this election is turned into a farce it's not because of Camilla and candidates because of this guy Trump and his son they are a joke and they're in public seem stupid things about people talking about how the country goes and they will survive. They're horror show it's all on tape there's a little witnesses the election board wants to review it this week is coming week and make a decision they don't want to embarrassment he's breaking the law he's a felon and he's got a lot of more cases coming up when I get him elected to pull them out and it's a waste of damn time it has a moron and people want to run the plan themselves they don't want him to run it it's going to be a fierce fight out here

Couple more things

Thor Freya

Olympus

[alirhi]

Finally caught somewhat of a break. I'm in a tremendous amount of pain even with my meds, but it's been a good day overall.

A few weeks ago, we had a small electrical fire in our bathroom, only we didn't know that's what it was at first. It tripped the outlet on the house, which shut down power to the camper and killed the fire before it could really catch. This happened every time we tried resetting the outlet and plugging the camper back in, until finally one of us was inside while the other fiddled with the power and loud buzzing was heard and bright blue light from sparks/flames was seen and we went "oh. okay, no touchy. got it." So we've been without even the minimal power we had for some time now, just one extension cord run from the house, through our kitchen window to a power strip we used to run lights, the space heater on colder nights, and charge electronics. It fucking sucked. We ended up putting the small appliances in storage, since we couldn't use any of them. no power to the outlets, and nowhere to put them near the power strip.

So anyway, that sucked ass, but we got through it, and a few days ago we talked to someone outside the entrance to Walmart who was asking for donations to help the homeless. I told him "sorry, we're in the same boat" and he asked if we need help. Sis and I explained the situation we're in the best we could, asking if he knew any electricians who would be willing to help for free, and he took sis's number and said he'd put out feelers online. Said he was pretty connected.

Dude wasn't kidding. The NEXT MORNING, someone called, and she was texting with him and setting up a time for him to come out and take a look. This afternoon, he replaced the bathroom outlet and faulty wiring that was causing the fire, cleaned out the crappy paper insulation that was feeding said fire, and was kind enough to do it all for free. He then gave me a quote for the cost of installing a 30amp outlet on the house so we could fully power this damn thing and have things like a working fridge and running hot water. It'll be insanely pricey, but when he broke it down for us, I realized he was still giving us the steepest discount he could. We'd mostly be paying for the (holy shit expensive) wire. Absolute sweetheart, as is the man outside Walmart who put us in touch with him. I'm so glad I didn't just scoot by with a "sorry, not today" when he asked if we wanted to donate.

Sis also found a baby garter snake in the yard today with a crushed tail. He still gets around okay and the injury seems to be low enough that his organs are functioning pretty well (he peed on her hand lmao and chugged water when we put some out for him; I've never seen a snake drink before and that was cute as hell).

We called a wildlife rescue that's going to take him tomorrow and see what they can do to help him, so he's resting in a fish tank with some paper towels and the little bottle cap full of water. Absolutely enamored with lil sis lol. He was scared at first, which makes sense; poor thing was trapped, injured, and these huge stompy creatures were hovering over him and touching him. But then she got him free of the dirt and grass he was caught on and he slithered all over her arms and shoulders. kept trying to go up her sleeves to hide lol. I asked to hold him before he's gone (originally she was going to drive him to the rescue while I waited for the electrician, but it was too far away and she didn't want to drive alone) and he wasn't having it. Wanted to stay with her.

Even after we got him in the tank, he stuck as close to her as he could. While she was standing nearby talking to the friend who loaned us the tank, he was nestled in the corner under the towels, when we got him inside and she sat by him, he smooshed up against the side she was sitting at and kept trying to climb out to her. Now she's in her room (opposite side of the camper from the seat she'd occupied) and he's hanging out on the side of the tank closest to her room. Every time she gets near or walks by, he follows her the best he can. it's fucking adorable. Wants nothing to do with me, but that's okay. He's still cute and sweet and I hope he makes it through the night and they can help him tomorrow.

I'm so grateful we were even there for sis to see him trapped. We never go into friend's yard if we can help it, but she's got baby chicks and said we can play with them if we want, so naturally we both booked it over to the coop to see the cute fluffies lol. and there next to it was this poor little guy stuck and hurt and dehydrated and probably scared to death.

I feel so blessed that someone was able and willing to help us, and that we're able to help this little snake. I just keep praying... Mother above, please let him be okay. He's such a wee babe.

[veiledtreasurebdb-blog]

IMPOSSIBLE DECISIONS

Terror bled through my veins as the reality of what I had just done hit me like a brick wall. I had just done the one thing my mahmen had always trained me not to do, the one thing I vowed I would never do. All these years of living free, and it could all come crashing down in one, thoughtless millisecond. What the hell was I thinking? This male was nothing to me. He was a male I had paid to take his vein, nothing more. Although, the more I recited those words in my head, the harsher the lie sounded. Somewhere along the way, this male had became more than that. When, I don’t know, because we had not known each other for more than a few weeks, a few feedings. How was it that it took so little time to feel like this male was meant for me? I knew nothing of him. Was this what my mahmen had always sheltered me from? I had heard whispers of how when a male and his mate met, there was a pull between them that overpowered anything else. Was that what this was? I couldn’t possibly be experiencing that. Not only because it wasn’t possible, but it wasn’t probable, it was insane is what it was! How was I ever supposed to keep what I was a secret if I was to be so drawn to someone else that I had no say in it? It all suddenly made sense, everything that my mahmen and Alexandria had taught me. The reasoning behind why I was never to reveal who and what I was to anyone, the reasoning behind why I was never to feed from any male that was not paid specifically for that reason, and the reasoning behind why my mahmen was always so picky as to who she paid for that service. It all made sense. For if I were to ever find my mate, I would not be able to keep away. She and Alexandria had always been so vigilant in choosing who they used for the service of feeding me. I had always thought they went overboard in being as picky as they had. Now, I knew better.

How could I have been so ignorant?! How could I have been so reckless in choosing someone to feed from? Better yet, what was I to do now? How was I to move on from this? Instinct screamed to leave Caldwell and never look back. But, I had come so far in finding the Brotherhood, that if I did leave now, I would surely never find my sisters. So, I had two choices: 1. Leave Caldwell and more than likely never find where I truly belonged, or 2. Allow fate to decide my course of action and without question be found out for who and what I was.

I went back to the front desk and told Alicia that I needed to leave, family emergency and all that, packed up my things and fled for my camper. It wouldn’t take any time at all to load it up and be on the road.

#ImpossibleDecisions #SASBDB #BDBRPG

[kellanved-ammanas]

Sniper Pals & Ships: Demo - Vicious

[A/N] Content warning for a brief mention of animal abuse, specifically a pit bull. Also, said pit bull isn't vicious. This fills the prompt through mentioning that pit bulls are purported to be vicious but this one proves that idea wrong. It's mild, like I said, just a mention of it and not an actual depiction of the pit bull being abused, which is part of why I didn't tag it in the main tags, but I feel it is a enough to be worth a heads up for anyone who might need it.

~

Demo wasn’t usually the type of guy who’d steal someone’s dog straight out of their backyard. But the poor beast had been chained up without much shade other than a teeny-tiny doghouse. It had been late evening when he’d found her so it hadn’t been too hot at the time but they were in the damn desert, making that an extra cruel thing to do. So leaving her there hadn’t been an option.

And so now Demo had a dog. A pit bull, supposedly a vicious blood thirsty breed. ‘Vicious’ was the last word he’d use to describe her though as she lay politely at his feet. She’d spent the night at the foot his bed and had followed him into his workshop after he’d fed her off his own plate because what else was he supposed to feed her?

“What the bloody hell am I supposed to do with you?”

Her ears moved as she turned her head to look at him. He’d only had her for half a day and yet she already seemed content with him.

While Demo liked animals, he’d never been a ‘having a pet’ type of person. He could barely take care of himself, how the hell was he supposed to keep a whole living being that was completely dependent upon him alive too? And he worked with a lot of dangerous chemicals and literal explosives, things that would be very bad for any animal that got into them even for a few seconds. Or if she bumped him hard enough at the wrong moment or surprised him with a loud bark because she caught another animal’s scent, it could be kablooeyfor both of them.

Well… if Demo couldn’t take care of her, the only solution was to look for someone who could and wanted to. Lucky for him, he lived on a base with a bunch of animal lovers. One of whom had even told him a little while ago that they’d like a dog one day. A dog to go hunting and camping with but surely a pit bull could be trained for that, right?

~

Sniper answered the knock on his camper van door looking like he’d been awoken from a nap. Demo normally would’ve apologized for that but he’d made it clear during prior such incidents that he didn’t mind as sleeping in the middle of the day wasn’t something he should be doing too much anyway.

“Yo, you want a dog?” Demo said instead.

“Huh?”

“I found a dog.” He stepped back to gesture towards her. He’d found a piece of rope to tie to her collar to make sure she wouldn’t run off. She hadn’t tried to though. “But I ain’t exactly the best person to be in charge of taking care of her so I figured I’d ask you if you want her ‘cause you said that you’d like a dog one day. So here’s a dog if you want her.”

“Where’d you find her?”

“Someone’s yard. She was chained up to a tiny dog house. There were food bowls but they empty. So I couldn’t just leave her there. She’s been real friendly so far but… I don’t think I’m equipped to take care of her.”

“Well, I don’t exactly have room in the camper for a dog.”

“Damn, guess that’s fair point though.” Demo had been hoping Sniper would take her because he’d grown rather attached to her and since he hung out with Sniper fairly often, that would mean he’d still get to see her plenty too.

“Could ask Scout. He’s got a wiener dog back home he’s real proud of so he might be willing to take her on.”

Seems Demo wasn’t the only one subjected to the admittedly cute dog pictures Scout’s Ma had mailed to him. Not that that was the least bit surprising, it was Scout after all. “Yeah, he’s probably a good option.” He also went on runs and stuff that dogs were supposed to enjoy. … “Or I could just keep her myself.”

Sniper raised an eyebrow. “You could. If you want tips on caring for animals and stuff, just ask. I ain’t an expert or nothing but I had dogs growing up.”

It was tempting, she was adorable, friendly, and she seemed to like Demo. Perhaps as recognizance that he’d saved or because she was just friendly, maybe a little bit of both. But… “Nah. Maybe when I’m better at staying sober for longer, I can get a dog or some other kind of pet. Right now though, it’d be a bad idea.” It wasn’t just about what he wanted but about what would be best for any potential pet he might acquire. He just wasn’t at a place in his life currently where he could give the kind of care and attention a dog needed.

“Well, good on you for admitting that.”

Demo grunted an acknowledgment. “Well, guess I’ll go see if Scout wants her. See you around.”