#way too long post again
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3x02 or me living of crumbs and angst
okay so I have so much and so little to say about this episode first of all: I love all of the scene of Jess in the background just reading idk why, but I love those!!! (Probably because a man reading is the most attractive thing)
So, I am not one to hate on Shane I have nothing against her she was just a teenage girl having fun (and good for her) but oh my god do I hate people who make out in public (I lose that logic for ep10 but ignore the hypocrisy) like I do not need to see all of that!!! but disgust for PDA aside I love this scene Rory looking genuinely crushed!!! (I mean look at her and tell me you don't want to hug her!!!)
And while I do feel bad for Rory, I can't help but think that this on her. I mean look I am a Rory defender till the end BUT she's the one that didn't talk to Jess ALL summer and just assumed that he would wait and while I love seing Rory jealous because of the drama (i love drama sorry) I can't but feel a little annoyed because what did she expect!!! but still the angst is everything. (But while I think it's kind of on her she is obviously allowed too still be hurt!!)
Jess looks at Rory and Rory looks away!!!!! I HATE THEM (affectionate)!!!
He was so clearly trying to test her reaction and there goes my other question: Why did Jess start seeing Shane? So, I'm not idiot and I'm sure that I'm overthinking it and the answer is as simple as that he is a teenager and hormones and everything BUT I'm always wondering what happened exactly that summer how long did Jess wait (because he definitely did before Rory not contacting him got to him) how did he meet Shane? (probably through school?) and in a few episode (I don't remember exactly) he gives a speech to Luke about pining, and he talks about his "relationship" with Shane so did Jess start seeing her to make Rory jealous (I don't think Jess would treat someone like that but idk) anyway if anybody has any theory feels free to share, I love reading them!!!
And... Dean walks in.... Okay I know that he hasn't done anything yet in this episode to deserve that amount of hate but in my defense at this point in the show I have seen too much of his face he is just sooooo boring like he has no personality and when he does have a semblant of personality he acts like an ass. what do you expect from me!!!
Now let's talk about the confrontation!!: And we are back to Jess cornering Rory in Doose's! My favorite thing about this scene is that neither Jess nor Rory are really mad about each other but more about their feelings for each other about how the other seemingly dosent care (although we know it's not the case) I think Jess is hurt by the no contact thing but I don't think he is necessarily mad about it (I think that's the only emotion he feels comfortable with showing right now) Rory is hurt that Jess didn't wait and I personally think that she feels like maybe their kiss didn't mean that much to him and by addition that she dosen't mean that much to him (ah miscommunication how I despise you).
"I could care less about you and Shane" Did anybody out there believe that? Again, I love Rory but I don't call her the Queen of Denial for nothing !
Okay I'm not going to lie I love Jess's rant about Rory not calling him (I love angst sue me!) but again I think that rant shows how he is channeling his hurt and transforming it into anger and you know why? because being angry is easier and I don't want to make things about gender roles but it's also more accepted for men hence why a lot of them end up with anger issues (look at the 'big not so friendly giant' as an example) but gender issues aside I think Jess just as a big problem with showing emotion and at this point the few times that we have seen him do so was with Rory he has shown her a side of him that he keeps hidden to protect himself and he let his guard down and got hurt. So now he is wary.
And again, I hate to say anything negative about Rory, but I get Jess being hurt about her still being with Dean to him it probably looks like she never intended to break up with Dean that she was just using him as a distraction. and Rory is also hurt so she doesn't try to explain that she did want to break up with Dean but then she saw him with Shane and so she changed her mind!!!!
In short, this fight is basically an example of why Rory and Jess couldn't work as a couple at that time. they both needed time.
They are THE blueprint for right person wrong time after all!
(Totally off topic but one of the thing I that think about the most when I watch this scene is there is no way that Rory and Jess fighting in Doose's wouldn't be known all over town after like an hour plus this is where Dean works!!! How did no one hear this!!!)
#the fact that the post is this long with so little content i am really just a rat give me anything I'll eat it up#is the fact that i'm a barchie and rina shipper showing?#reading too much into stuff is fun OK#way too long post again#thank you if you read it all tho!!!#also everything that I say about jess and emotion hits way too close to home#we are the same person at this point#😭#just have a conversation damnit#anti dean forester#because i'm me#literati#rory x jess#rory gilmore#jess mariano#nell is obsessed with gilmore girls tag#nell's rewatch of gilmore girls 2022#nell having a mental break tag
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the star you've longed for
#PLEASE WATCH REVUE STARLIGHT!!!!!!💥💥💥💥💥#project sekai#revue starlight#pjsk#emu otori#nene kusanagi#emunene#prsk#proseka#yuri win. i make my fav pairing fight tothe death#HAPPY EMUNENE WEEK LOOOOOL#Can i be hinestni think this sucks it took way too long cause i forgot how to draw for a week#im seeing demons and stuff. i feel more normal now. Also you may recall emu has a big hammer for revstar#thats the bottom of it the gem thing all the weapons have hers is sharp#i remember seeing meta post abt how mahiru has a blunt weapon because she never actually aimed for the lead role#rather she only wanted to be by karen's side. so her weapon wasnt capable of cutting anything in the first place#Fastforward to the movie and well LOLLLLL#though i think its funny in the movie her mace is still mostly used for i timidation againstbhikari.. bc again shes not winning for a lead#revue starlight youre neat. maybe i like revstar.#<- has been insane for 4+ years#Needed their pose to be smth where nenes weapon isnt visible because I DONT KNOW WHAT WEAPON TO GIVE HER. OOMFS HELP. I NEED A NENE WEAPON.#i thought some sort of polearm/spear/halberd etc something with range but that can be ambitious#but i feel like smth with that much footwork needed doesnt suit her.. And she cant hsve a sniper i dont think thatwould fucking work#aruru gets pistols in the revue but aruru also is Ummm well shes uhhh. [screaming] [car crash]#throwing knives would be funny wouldnt it. Put that gamer aim to use#idk if the emunene week tag is on here but i'll donit anyways#emuneneweek2024#EDIT: i have decided nene gets a rapier. its awesome. thanks for coming#tsukasa has his giant flag and i dont want to budge on that. im thinking about giving rui the throwing knives since he juggles.#it would be funny. saki + rui knife juggling
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This scene for Gale triggered for me in the funniest place possible
#baldur's gate 3#bg3#bg3 gale#gale bg3#bg3 tav#astarion bg3#shadowheart bg3#GHAUGH THE TAGS. TOO MANY. but alas.#kunst huli#aino bg3 oc#i wanted to fully color this at first but then i was like. wait. wait a moment.#i can make my life so much easier. i can live deliciously#but for real gale pls we COULD have at LEAST moved to the side#also formal apology for making posts long with my pic placement but it just looked the best in this way.....#and i CANNOT be assed to size my panels pre-upload so nothing is cut off weirdly. sorry#also i drew everyone but gale in their jammies bcs i cant be assed to draw armor. sorry again
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here we have a late submission for day 6 of zukki week 2024: heist au (click for better quality)
@zukki-week
more thoughts under the cut
i got back into leverage this week so of course i couldn't not draw zukki as the ot3. i think suki would work better as a grifter than a thief (maybe even a hitter) but yk. i also stayed up way too long thinking about who is the mastermind and who is the grifter/thief remaining and i got to the following conclusions:
song as the mastermind and jin as a grifter just butters up my heart like i missed these girls like crazy and i think it would fit them (also azula as jim sterling is way too funny)
but then we have azula as nate (which i think is equally funny) and ty lee as thief
also mai as nate but thats just because i ship mailee and i wanted them together
#i spent way too long on this. and im putting off homework to post this#because again: shit time management#dont look at what sokka's holding please#the nigerian job has such dark scenes i cant tell whats in them djdhjs#like dont even ask me how long i spent trying to figure out what they were wearing in this scene#anyways i think they're iconic#like the ultimate ot3s#zukki#zukki week 2024#zuko#sokka#suki#leverage au#atla#my art
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Silver + glasses = wise old man trope...
. this has been a wip for like. weeks - i had no energy left to finish it properly lol so i'm posting it as is-----
'bonus' (VERY. UNFINISHED- )
#twst#twisted wonderland#deuce spade#ram's art#i im not tagging anyone else actually--#this is so unfinished i just. didnt feel like finishing it---- it's been a wip for WAY too long rip#alas irl stuff has been ROUGH lately (i'm free again though so. hopefully the next art thing i post is like. actually finished---)#im so sad i didn't manage to get anything drawn for the white rabbit event in time :[[[[[#i loved it so muchhhhhhh and i got EVERY card for it!!!!!!!!!!!1 lets gooooooo!!!!!!!!#since there's a vil card for the scarabia hometown trip as a bonus for the rerun - i hope this event gets a bonus card in the future.....#yea - apparently there's no vignette for the bonus cards - but at least i get to see more of the costumes-!
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Return date for my webcomic, Time and Time Again!
It's been set for a while but sometimes they change the date without warning, so I'll keep you updated if anything changes!
I'm extremely proud of the work I've been doing on it, I can't wait to share everything!
See you then!
#i still have to finish book 4#soooo iiiiiii will do that... this week...#really trying to be done with it but this one is taking so long for all the changes!#hoping to have an update on that soon too#might have taken on a few too many projects#but yay! return!#yippee!!!#i would say sorry its been so long but theres no way it could have been shorter and other people are gone way longer#i tried to leave things on a nice note so itd only be missed for wanting more#and not missed for feeling abandoned#ok! time to get up for another day of work! really need some things off my list so my days can be like.#9/10 hours instead of 12 LOL#im so tired. im legitimately extremely overworked it's a problem#ok bye back to work for me#return#hiatus stuff#time and time again#announcement#use this post to talk about how excited you are and make guesses and shower me with praise :-)[-[#LMAO
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Transcript:
Machine.
Does my ass look fat in this armor?
Audio source
#ultrakill#gabriel ultrakill#ONE QUESTION. DO IT JIGGLE?! (i am swiftly beheaded for this)#its not obvious due to the helmet but hes supposed to be somewhat looking back at the 'camera' bro got caught in 4k. do u understand#i debated giving v1 a blank stare vs having more of an eye so i kinda went in the middle#in the source he says 'what do you mean yes?' afterwards but it didnt match the pic so i cut it out#i spent way too long on the art i will never do that again#chat never spend 20+ hours on a shitpost worst mistake of my life#future shitpost art will be a lot simpler like the stuff ive posted in the past i just was not normal about this#posts that put me on the 'cannot be left in a room with gabe' watchlist#who am i kidding i was already on the list#my art
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birthday boy 🎂
#river dipping#theodore doe#matthias evanoff#a burning house to live in#echthroi#ts4#ts4 edit#simblr#ts4 screenshots#theo i hope you're having the most insane birthday sex rn i hope it's ******** and ***** and ***'** **** *** **** ***** :)<3#sorry i put off making your birthday edit for so long that i had to pivot and post this edit instead of the one i wanted </3#...very funny how similar this is to that LAST render i posted... well so WHAT!! if i think matthias looming is sexy!!#this is based on a photo that everyone was drawing their ocs as so really it's not MY fault he's back there clinging and being a freak#actually if y'all want this pose lmk... i'll share it but fyi it's only meant to be seen from the waist up and idk how it'd look#on a sim that doesn't have the same muscle mass and like. bulk. that matthias has......................................#just got rock hard after typing that... anyway.#HAPPY BIRTHDAY THEO <333333333 LOVE YOU SO MUCH I PROMISE I'M GONNA KEEP WORKING ON THE //ACTUAL// BIRTHDAY EDIT!! like .#posted abt this on the sideblog but the real edit i have planned for him is making me lose my fucking gourd#and it'll probably take me :))) a few more days to figure out#expect a depressing theo-as-a-teenager edit eventually tho. with writing!! accompanying it!!#matthias's face has changed again btw 😭 i redid it almost immediately after i posted that first render attempt so he looks DIFFERENT!!#i posted screenshots of him in cas just the other day on my other acc and he looks so good in them i might post them here too#oh and!! this edit looks massively different than my last because this screenshot was taken with a new preset i made specifically for#the real birthday edit i'm working on... it's a hallway scene so i figured out depth and density to get this really cool fog effect#i'm really excited for it!! in my head the way it looks makes me crazy but idk if i can pull it off properly. but like i WAS SAYING!!#new preset is sooo sexy after i post this i'll reblog with the before and after to show you how good it looks even w/o any editing#like. the colors....... literally have always wanted a preset like this i'm so glad i spent yesterday fucking around with it#ALSO!! i've been doing those oc/ship dynamic templates for fun recently so i might post a few of them here soon#realize i'm rambling so much in these tags bc i haven't been here in forever kfjnkfjhn ummmmm. let me stop.#EVERYONE WISH THEO HAPPY BIRTHDAY RIGHT NOW 🫵‼
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Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them
#UTDR#UTMV#Cross Sans#Killer Sans#Kross ship#(Kinda. It's up to interpretation)#Long post#I'm so sorry I didn't mean for it to be THIS much#I started this like a week ago -A-#Lies down and lets out a long howl it's finisheeeeeed#I could have just drawn them spooning and written the rest but noooo I love to do things the hard way#Anyway I think they should be bed buddies#The company helps Cross relax enough to sleep and the touch helps knock Killer out#Cross has to be big spoon because otherwise Killer's soul gets squished and it's too uncomfortable to sleep#Also I realised Cross and Nightmare are the only two in the castle who didn't have knock knock jokes in their backstory#I like to imagine Nightmare has had similar confusing interactions with at least one of them#Cross probably spends the rest of the day panicked that he overstepped a boundary or the others will make fun of him#Not realising that Dust and Horror have fallen asleep together many times#Or that Killer hasn't slept properly in weeks and he's in heaven#I'm NOT drawing a follow up so just imagine Killer coming to Cross's room the next night and finding every excuse to stay#Because he wants it to happen again but he has no idea how to ask (and also Cross seems kinda awkward about it)#Absolutely terrified that I spent my whole week off working on this and it might be not that great so I hope at least one person likes this
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your half of the ransom
inspired by this post and scar's tweets about secret life :] i speedran this just in time for the first eps of the new season to drop!! as always likes and reblogs and especially comments in the tags are appreciated❤️ enjoy!!
Scar wakes to a field of sunflowers.
The sun itself is a swollen yolk bleeding gold at its edges when he blinks, cascading down from the horizon to melt over the earth with indiscriminate fervor. It dips the petals of each field-flower in honey, honing their silhouettes to supple knife-points— even the soil beneath him, packed firm from countless nights of sleep, has burnished to a fine, patinated bronze. In the amber of its rays stray pebbles transmute to pyrite, the subtle scrabble of roots to filigree, and caught in the open mouth of such gaudy resplendence, Scar digs an elbow into the dirt and hauls himself, reluctant, back to his own unsteady feet.
Even at full height the sunflowers still tower, blocking all signs of hearth and home. But the sun (popped, bleeding, all gored-out gold in the upturned belly of the sky) remains his guide— Scar picks his legs up in a faltering stumble to follow it before catching rough fingers against the stalk of a nearby sunflower. He flinches; this early, it's too easy to perceive each stalk as part of a swarm, a yellowed panoptic presence bearing down on the world-weary muscles of his shoulders.
Their seeds will need harvesting soon. Scar hums, a match-strike against unyielding silence, and casts his gaze back to the sun above to orient himself in the direction of his base.
Until they're ready, he has nowhere else to be.
Trader Scar's is too-empty for so comely a morning, a hollowed-out shell long rebuilt and bristling with more wares than he has those to sell them to. But it's a familiar charade— Scar slips into the back with a single sunflower clenched tight in his palm, bruising the petals and scratching against the insides of his fingers. He changes in rapid, efficient motions; last night's poncho is discarded over a nearby chest in exchange for a brighter one, yellow wool lovingly dyed; his hair is released from its tie, combed through, then braided again; the soft leather shoes he'd worn underneath the stars are left to clump by the doorway in favour of far-keener diamond. Worn in but undamaged, the crystal chimes without dents or scratches— there's nothing left to fight here, anymore.
When Scar steps back out to the front, a ghost is waiting patiently for him at the counter.
Or— the ghost of a ghost, if he's being generous. The outline of a shadow, the flicker of a distant mirage. "Oh," Scar says, and the word scrapes like rust from the well of his throat. He'd recognize those wings anywhere. "Well, hello there, Grian."
Grian's filmy outline says nothing. They never do, when the shades appear for a rare visit. The barrier between living and dead remains a clear divide, a gorge through which Scar cannot pass— all that's left between them now are the soft, faded echoes of what was, and what it could have been.
Still, in the year he's spent here, that's never deterred him from a potential sale. Scar props a hip up against the counter, eyeing the flickering shadow and mustering up his best imitation of an enthusiastic smile. "So what brings you out here to my neck of the woods? Looking for something to buy? Some fine goods to trade, perhaps? Man, I don't think I've seen you around in a dog's age. How about some catching up?"
The back of his neck prickles, electric; Grian's shade is a stygian blot in his vision, a fuzz of static that extends its presence from floor to ceiling. His ghost keeps his silence.
Scar tugs his smile wider, flashing two rows of bright, gleaming teeth in Grian's direction until the strain threatens to choke him. "No? Not even a little bone for ol' Scar? Well, tell you what, don't you go standing on su— se— oh, ceremony! Come in, come in! You make yourself at home, you know how I just love a visitor— how about I make us a drink to share and you tell me where in the world you've been, mister."
He doesn't bother waiting for a non-existent reply; instead, Scar swoops down to snag his fingers against the cupboard he'd installed within the counter months ago, fumbling with the latch before throwing its doors wide open with a gust of musty air. Inside, an eclectic mix of quite high-quality wares and some of Scar's own humble belongings tangle, speckled with cobwebs and the first faint stirrings of freshly disturbed dust.
Scar purses his lips, eyeing each item in turn. A nautilus shell here, a few scraps of wood there, some glass bottles, the handle of a ladle he'd cracked over six months back.... Squinting, he thrusts his hand deep into the mess, sweeping the items aside and shuffling new ones into view until— there!
Toward the back lies a dented iron kettle, brittle with disuse. Scar snaps forward, straining out his arm until the tips of two fingers meet the edge of its dusty wooden handle. With a grunt, he flicks it closer, wincing at the shrill scrape of iron on wood as it inches toward him.
SCAR.
It is not a voice. No mere voice can resonate a single word like that in his chest, trembling in his bones and drumming out from the chambers of his very heart. Like a ripple on the still surface of a lake, it rattles through him, scattering each thought to the far corners of his mind and stripping him raw, flaying open his ribs to splay beneath the scorching sun. The yelp that bubbles up to his lips flies past them unbidden, rocketing out with such force that he jolts, and rams his skull straight into the overhanging lip of the counter.
White-on-red sparks, a cherry-hot bolt of fire centered on his crown. "OW! Oh, oh my gosh, I-I— Grian?"
None of the shades haunting him and this server have spoken. They've never spoken. They've never— so why now, when he's made his peace with that—
Scar wets his lips, tongue dry as desert bone, and drags the kettle out of the cupboard with one quick yank. Clutching it to his chest, he rises back up on shaky feet, holding it up as if to ward off an incoming attack. Some shield; its hollow interior reverberates with a screech when he raps his knuckles against it. "Now— now hang on, mister, you can't just— you— oh my gosh, I-I think you just made my heart stop there for a second." A bracing breath. Two. "Y-You can't just shock a man in his own home like that! You...."
Scar trails off. The misty impression hovering on the other side of the counter remains impassive, impersonal— this is not the Grian he knows.
The Grian he knew.
Deep within the static writhe of his shade, the after-image burn of greyed-out eyes begin to squirm to the surface. Scar flicks his gaze back to the kettle with instinctive, long-honed deference, staring hard into the distorted lines of his own reflection.
YOU WON. Once again the words rip something vital in him, boil up through his veins to tear themselves, wet and coppery, on the limp meat of his tongue. Scar risks a peek up, lump hanging heavy in his throat; each syllable comes out as a squeak, threatening to crack the smooth silver of his voice.
"I— yep, I sure did! I sure did, and— thank you very much, for noticing! I, uh, I still don't know how I did that, what with— oh, you know how it is, with, with the, uh, the— friends situation, how that all panned out. Y'know, actually, I wonder if that's wh—"
The eyes blink at him, asynchronous and blank. Hollow. In the heartbeat it takes for them to train back on his own, a soul-wrenching wave of gooseflesh ripples up over Scar's arms.
He whirls himself away so fast his vision spins. "So, uh— tea! You like tea, right Grian?" Without ceremony Scar scrambles to the other side of the room, forcing the counter still between them, every nerve in his body winding tighter, tighter, kinetic energy in a bottle. "How about, um, a—" he rifles through a new cabinet, clumsy with frenzy— "oh, shoot, now where did I put that— I've got some, uh, some dandelion root! Hand roasted by yours truly, of course. Not that anyone else could do it now, but— oh, oh, and look at the lavender, now that's just delicious, you've gotta try it, G, I know you'll just absolutely love it."
Silence. Scar's hand pauses, braced tight on the handle of the cabinet.
"Grian," he says, slow, quiet. Lets the words drift up, shining soap bubbles, to pop against the ceiling. "Why— what are you doing here?"
To his credit, Grian is direct. IT'S TIME.
Without permission, Scar's fingers tighten around the handle of the cabinet. "It's— what? Wait, wait—" He blinks. Does not turn around. "Time for what?"
Silence.
Scar licks his lips, worrying at the split still stinging at the right hand corner. "Time for what, Grian?"
The distinct pall of burning ozone scalds through the air. Tentatively, Scar shoots a glance back down into the kettle, peering at the distinct smudge still smearing the wall behind him. No eyes in its reflection; some of the tension riding in his shoulders loosens, slackens his tendons and begins to uncurl his fingers from the cabinet knob.
Without warning, a wash of ice wisps forward to numb the small of his back. COME HOME, Grian says simply. The words echo in the gap beneath his sternum, drag themselves up each vertebrae in his spine, and Scar freezes stiff, solid.
"This is home," Scar says, blank.
NO.
Some hot ember, banked countless months ago, sparks back to life in the pit of his stomach. "It is," he says, more firmly this time. "It's— that's it. You said it yourself: I won. And I did it fair and square, I'll say. I followed every rule, every task to the— to the nth degree, and... and now I, um." He falters. Grits his teeth until the molars ache. "I get to live with it."
But a sudden chill that has nothing to do with the shade behind him abruptly slips beneath his skin. Hesitantly, still clutching the kettle in one hand like a lifeline, Scar says belatedly: "... Right?"
Despite the sun nearing midday, the temperature around him plummets. NOT ANYMORE.
"Oh," Scar says. The metal surface of the kettles creaks as his second hand joins the first, digging nails into rust and grime. "I— again?"
YES.
"... And what if I don't want to do it again."
He does not phrase it as a question. They both know his answer.
Scar sucks in a sharp shock of air anyway, rattling the kettle against his chest and daubing a blotch of dust over the soft wool of his poncho. "Is—" he bites his lip— "will everyone... be there?"
YES.
Ah. Scar's eyes slip shut of their own accord; behind them, dozens of veins brim over, webs of blood welling up and spilling to slake a thirst so abyssal it could drink and drink for years without satiation.
"... Will you be there?"
For one long, nightmare-eternity, Grian does not reply. Then, a knife between his ribs: YES.
With slow, halting steps, Scar turns. "Okay," he breathes, and drags a hand over his eyes to cloak them both in darkness, and sags back until his skull knocks against the cabinet door with a dull, tender thunk. Each exhale emerges as a series of shaky puffs, damming up his lungs and swallowing all the air in his esophagus. Scar shudders, scrapes his bitten-down nails against iron, and breathes with the roiling of his gut. "... Okay."
When he opens his eyes again, Grian's ghost has vanished.
The spot it occupied is still frigid when he waves a trembling hand through it; Scar inhales, exhales, inhales again. Rinse and repeat, the perfect cycle, the mantra against extraneous thought. Then, solemn and deliberate, he holds the kettle out in front of him, trailing one wandering finger over its dents and bruises, tracing the paths between the known and the new.
"Guess I'll see you there," he tells it, and lifts its grubby handle up in absent toast.
High above, the bleeding sun strikes noon at last. Scar does not harvest the sunflowers.
#goodtimeswithscar#grian#scarian#desert duo#trafficshipping#trafficblr#secret life#life series#mcyt#mcyt fic#mcytblr#shouting speaks#I SPENT WAY TOO LONG ON THIS FRANKLY#yay for. yet another speed-ran secret life fic tho??? gtws what cocomelon shit r u DOING 2 me......#my fics#will go up on ao3 later. when im alive again. YEEHAW#EDIT: THIS POSTED FROM DRAFTS OH MYGOOOOODS WELP AT LEAST THIS WILL KEEP ME FROM CONTINUING TO FIDDLE WITH IT. GOOD FUCKKNG NIGHT#txt
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He matches now!
#coin's art#Fuck ne il g aiman but im not gonna let another shitty man demotivate me to make art again besides this was already mostly finished when#the news came out#Been through enough of these fucking people hes not even his character anyways#Not talking abt that on here though just appreciate the boy#I dont think i got his eyes right but its okay hes perfect to me#digital art#artists on tumblr#fanart#original art#monty the crow#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives agency#dbd#dbda#dbd monty#dbda monty#joshua robert colley#This took way too long not to post#monty finch
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heeyyy gaaanggg
the pose and the background of the album version (left) are based on oingo boingos only a lad album art. not cause i think he has anything to do with it but just cause ive been wantin to draw that pose for like. weeks and i didnt know who to put there. so why not my latest bug man.
#my art#digital art#digital painting#fanart#resident evil 7#ethan winters#goddd PLEAAASEEEE#i havent known if i was gonna post this or not multiple times in the process of drawin this. but ultimately i spent too much time on it to#NOT post it. embarrassment be damned#but at the same time what am i even doin yknow. what is this what is goin on pleaaseee PLEASEEEEE#I DONT KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT RESIDENT EVIL!!! I DONT KNOW N O T H I NG I KNOW LESS THAN NOTHING#HOW?? HOW DID I GET HERE??? WHY DID THIS HAPPEN???? i know exactly the answer to all those questions but it still boggles me how fast this#happened. usually it takes WEEKS if not MONTHS for me to start makin fanart. this was faaasttttt TOO FAST and im like. genuinely constantly#thinkin about this game. im ALWAYS thinkin about this game. part of why this took me so long to do is cause i always wanna play re7 or thin#about re7 in a strange and deranged way. ive actually genuinely been SICK WHAT HAPPENEDDDDDD#im losing it!! anyways this took me a looonggg ass time and i redrew it soo many timmmessss#i did like. 3 lineart passes. the album version i did 3 shading passes. i really struggled!! and ultimately i dont know how i feel about it#like i kinda resent it. for takin so long and makin me suffer so much#never again. never again will i spend that much time on a drawing. i HATE when drawins take a long time. i HATE that. it makes me madddd#ive been insane. ive been so insane. and im not gettin better like i cant sleep sometimes cause im thinkin about this game and this guy and#that gal like i think about them!! so! so much!! oh my god!!#in the time it took me to finish this ive done like 10 sketches for other pieces like. and ive had like 3 ideas ive written down.#and like 50 that i havent written or sketched.#IVE WRITTEN POETRY!! P O E T R Y !!!#i write the occasional poem when im feelin some kinda profound emotion but i NEVER write poetry about media SOBBING#anyways thats the post i think this is the beginnin of the end so lets hold hands and pray. ugh sorry if i get sick. im shakin.
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absolutely unrelated arts because I didn't want to spam post it
#merlin#bbc merlin#merlin bbc#merthur#arthur pendragon#king arthur#merlin emrys#merlin x arthur#merlin fanart#this is killing me. i had this idea in my head for too long and i can't maki it right. like i can't draw it the way i want it to be#i mean the first art#and i have one of the first merlin fanarts with the same theme but i didn't post it because. again. i didn't like how it turned out#and i honestly hesitated to post this art#i will probably end up redrawing it again and again until i get what i want#maybe i just need to rest a little#art#artists on tumblr#my art
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I LOVE Teen Stan and Ford, it’s sad they don’t get drawn enough, so thank you so much!
Does Ford ever help Stan when he gets overstimulated? Or maybe when he has a rage response and suddenly starts crying and calls himself stupid?
Here's the other post with Ford
#I am once again asking someone to write me a fic about these two posts. pretty please 🥺#this took me way too long to think off#the dialogue was escaping me#if you can guess what the book he's reading is... you won't win anything I just think it would be cool#maybe Stan got upset about his grades. or a boxing match ir something#sometimes I too bite myself. not deep enough to draw blood but enough to bruise. it's gotten better over the tears but still#now and then...#anywayszzzzzzzz#ask#anonymous#gravity falls#stan pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#ford pines#teen stan#teen ford#art#fanart#traditional art#watercolor#the last few drawings came out so nicely#both of them are emotionally constipated in their teen years (and onwards honestly) so instead of addressing the crying they ignore it#they pretend it never happened#btw here you can see my (successful) attempt at putting Ford out of the picture so I don't have to draw more#comic#long post#look at their socks#I forgot the 's' in 'books' I'm so stupid god
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What if we were both magic prodigies and it otherized us in different ways and we devoted ourselves to protecting a family member who has general other goals & priorities. What if we both did self-sacrifical devotion in opposite ways.
What if we were dark mirrors of each other and where I've grown overcontrolling you've grown complacent. What if, bought as a servant into a pretty loving home, ownership and control is what love looks like to me, and to you neglected and lonely growing up, love is gratefully taking any scraps of it you’re lent.
By belonging to someone, even if she comes back injured or fails at finding Delgal, she feels like she belongs and is cherished, by owning someone he feels safe in them not leaving him.
She’s what’s tethering him do you see… And he’s the only thing giving her direction and purpose in her state. She needs a compass and he needs a support.
They’re both so out of it 😭 It’s the weirdly intense and unearned mutual trust and reliance on each other?? They’re each other’s weird little comfort codependent teddy bear. Or at least they were headed towards that before SHE DIED THEN HE DIED THEN THEY BOTH FORGOT ABOUT EACH OTHER AND NEVER MET EVER AGAIN. Though she’s also the guard attack hound keeping him safe… And vice versa he heals her and can rewrite her very being with just one wave of his hand. They’re both so so mentally and physically vulnerable both but they cling onto each other. They can’t perceive things accurately but despite it all someway somehow they stumble into something closer to resembling companionship just before they both die. Falin is just that kind and Thistle is just that lonely. Overworked. We both haven’t lived for ourselves in a very long time, haven’t we.
They both have a similar devotion to the people they love but again the difference is that Thistle starts overtsepping while Falin is self-effacing. The other difference between them is that people care about Falin <3 People have given up on Thistle long ago, and he has given people reasons to, while people refuse to give up on Falin. Yaad has a mini arc about it dw about it it’s ok he’s not all alone in the end 😭😭 He reached out for Marcille’s hand but they already all wanted to help him, they just had to be given the chance to, Yaad just had to be given the chance to, it’s okay I’m okay
Hey what if we learned to get in touch with our own identity and the world around us and living in the present again through being in the worst codependent situationship ever.
Falin and Thistle sitting in a tree, sucking on flowers together because they’re h-u-n-g-r-y 💕💕💕
I bet he’s only ever thought of flowers as useless ornaments. Weak weeds. But she shows him they’re tasty and useful and good and pretty in their own right too and deserve existing without proving their worth and waaa <33 Thistles…... Did you know thistles taste sweet if you remove the thorns and eat them?
"Even as a chimera, her kind nature remains" you can’t suppress her in the way that matters. You can’t soothe him in the way that matters. It’s doomed. You’re doomed. It’s all doomed. Save me.
#Spoilers#dungeon meshi manga spoilers#Thistle#falin touden#thistlin#OOOOH UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP THAT SOMEHOW WORKS OUT SAVE ME#I need them to be traumabonded kittens to not separate post-canon#I’m seeing a raise in post-canon thistle content/interest which makes me v happy#Fumi rambles#Falin learning to disobey orders with Thistle is one of my fave things. EAT THAT CURRY GIRL!!!! Nvm that it’s gonna get you killed#It’s good for the character arc#Falin and thistle sitting on a web o-b-s-e-s-s-i-n-g <3#This is somewhat of a tldr of my huge thistlin post. Plus some thoughts i had in discord or twitter#Keeping it for another day but tbh if you see their dynamic in canon as her thinking/having picked him as her mate it changes nothing#about her behavior which I find funny. Thistle accidentally claimed himself a parrot mate bc he’s bad with monsters confirmed#Ik my thing of them learning to relax and live in the present moment again is pretty fanon BUT IT’S WHAT KUI POINTED TOWARDS#With her calming him down from a panic attack and eating berries. With the baths for dandruffs. Etc. Thistle hasn’t socialized in a long#time and he wouldn’t if it wasn’t a tool he needed to interact with BUT it’s still socialization and it’s getting him in touch with his#surroundings again even if just a bit slowly but surely!! The Toudens have a superpower in reaching Thistle. Bless#How’s that one post go again. he refuses to develop he's part of the problem he maintains the cycle he's trapped in the cycle.#she's growing she's finding her place she escaped her original role she wants to help people she will never save him she will never save hi#Something something they have to abstract each other bc relationships with humans have always been too charged and unsafe#Only by seeing each other as more concept than person more object than peer can they truly be vulnerable#Like the fuckedupness lf their dynamic and state is WHY they’re so attached. Why their dynamic could be so raw and needy#The stars aligned in the worst way. Mission successfully faile#Tfw we both need to feel needed
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Mini psa:
Please stop comparing my au to a preexisting au in the undertale fandom-- it's getting really tiresome and frustrating to constantly be compared to it
#It was funny the first few times#But now it's really really repetitive getting constant asks and comments saying it#I know there is similarities however they are not related to eachother whatsoever#Iv already talked about this before but I have to mention it again since it's been a while since my last post on it#Welcome home mob au#Also apologies if this comes off rude or very self centered- this has been going on for way too long#Daily iv been getting asks saying it and it's really been destroying my motivation
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