#waffles with izzy

[izzystradlindoesitforme]

Nothing would be more satisfying than eating a hot, fresh, gourmet Belgian waffle while getting the mind-numbing, thigh-shaking, convulsions-inducing, magnitude 8.9, world-famous, five-star Izzy Stradlin 'treatment'.

Except if the waffle had blueberry compote and whipped cream. And Izzy was feeding it to me at same time.

Reblog if you like waffles or if you want your 80s rock star crush to fuck you into next week

[ams-puppy]

made some stuff for sugar and waffles

—Lain

[alphacygni]

Con is not immune to Edizzy waffle either

[incorrectbatfam]

batfam members being the smartest and dumbest person in the room at the same time

Damian: Here's the plan: we wait for your mother to put the pie on the windowsill to cool. Then, I'll spoof a call to her work phone in order to draw her away. That's when you come in and take it. Are we clear?

Jon: *walks up to Lois*

Jon: Mom, can Damian and I have a piece of pie?

Lois: Of course, here you go.

———————

Cullen: I tripped over my shoelaces again.

Harper: I can make self-tying shoelaces that can only come apart when you use a password-protected app.

Cullen: ...I was just thinking of wearing velcro.

———————

Duke: Check out my project! Not to brag, but I think I know who's winning the science fair.

Izzy: What is it?

Duke: It's a chamber that excites nanoparticles to generate short-term high-intensity thermal energy that can alter organic matter to make them suitable for human consumption. What do you think?

Izzy: Funny, I have one at home. Only I call it a microwave.

———————

Dinah and Babs: *talking*

Dinah: One sec, I'm getting a call.

Dinah: *answers her phone*

Dinah, immediately hanging up: Never mind.

Barbara: Was your number leaked? I have a list of possible suspects and plans for dealing with each one.

Dinah: Relax, it was just spam.

———————

Bernard, with a mic: Welcome back to MasterChef: Young Justice. We're down to our finalists, Red Robin and Spoiler. Let's see what they brought us today.

Tim: I made a nutrient-dense mass-conserving meal replacement with all essential components compressed in a gelatinous cube for a quick, on-the-go meal during our off-world missions. I'm serving it with a protein shake served in a vacuum-sealed pouch made completely out of recycled materials.

Steph: I made authentic Belgian waffles using techniques dating back to the 1958 Brussels World Fair. I'm serving it with a warm Swiss chocolate ganache, Japanese white strawberries, and homemade ube powdered sugar. For a drink, we have a cappuccino made with fair-trade Colombian dark roast beans and milk sourced from local farmers.

Kon, Bart, and Cassie: *taste and discuss*

Kon: You're both eliminated.

Tim and Steph: What?!

Cassie: Red Robin, the point of this competition is to showcase taste and culinary artistry, not just your engineering skills.

Bart: And Spoiler, you were supposed to make soup.

———————

Cass: *sneaks out her room*

Cass: *rolls down the hall*

Cass: *jumps over the couch*

Cass: *crawls through the vents*

Cass: *climbs down the rafters*

Cass: *slides down a gas pipe into the Batcave*

Cass: *lands in front of the door*

———————

Dick: I'll infiltrate the Iceberg Lounge with my state-of-the-art wearable camouflage that uses reverse psychology to throw all suspicions off of me by catching people's attention in a completely different way.

Jason: Pfft, lame. You should check out my latest tech. It's a potassium nitrate–based mixture that can be activated with a built-in timer to both create a diversion and incapacitate more of the Penguin's cronies at once.

Dick: That's stupid. We need to be subtle.

Jason: No, what we need is efficiency.

Dick: Roy, what do you think?

Roy, looking up from his phone: I think one of you wants to dress in drag and the other made a bomb.

———————

Bruce: I need the kids to steer clear of Crime Alley tonight so I can deal with a situation but I don't want to bench them because then they'll be mad at me. Any ideas?

Alfred: Give them paperwork.

Selina: Send them on a wild goose chase.

Kate: Get them to bench themselves.

Renee: Wow.

Renee: You all suck.

[hiimcanadia]

I think along with Izzy being just as obsessed with Blackbeard in modern AUs as he is in canon, Pete also needs to be just as obsessed in his own way. If Izzy is going "Edward I'm not going to let you throw away your reputation as the best waffle house manager the world has ever seen for some [slur redacted]" then Pete needs to be standing 10 feet away going "Holy shit Lucius that's Blackbeard! The man who became a waffle house manager in just two weeks by being able to cook a sausage perfectly every time!!! Do you think he'd autograph the receipt for me?? 😍😍😍"

[anakinstwinklebunny]

Author's note: reminding everyone interested about BUNNYTINE

SAM MONROE never really thought there would be a day where he’d be spending his Friday afternoon walking aimlessly around his mom’s overgrown garden, tiny, chubby fingers clutching onto his left hand.

Vinnie’s puffy cheeks were slightly flushed from the warmth, little legs wobbling with each step as he followed wherever Sam led him--or, more accurately, wherever he decided they needed to stop every few seconds.

“Sammy,” Vinnie lisped, tugging at Sam’s fingers when he spotted something new. He stumbled over to a patch of daisies, eyes wide with fascination as he crouched down, completely absorbed in yet another flower

To which sam sighed. He never in his life was that mad at his mom for planting so much flowers. They’d barely made it five steps, and the kid was already obsessed.

“They’re just flowers, dude,” he muttered, but when he saw the way Vinnie’s tiny hands trying to grab at the petals, his annoyance melted into something disgustingly soft.

Boy didn’t respond tho, of course, too focused on his new, very important task of collecting every daisy within reach. For what? San could only pretend to guess. He exhaled through his nose, eventually crouching down beside him.

“You like those?” he asked, voice quieter now. Vinnie just babbled something incomprehensible, which Sam took as a yes.

So they kept going--well, stopping every few steps--until Vinnie spotted something that completely stopped him in his tracks.

Tulips.

Sam didn’t even get a chance to prepare himself before Vinnie’s little legs carried him straight to the bright petals. He let go of Sam’s hand, plopping down on the dirt with a delighted giggle, reaching for the tulips like they were the most magical, beautiful things in the world. Acting like he was ready to hug them all, squeeze them tight, wish the best day (in his own way) before leaving them all behind

Sam sat beside him, leaning his elbows on his knees. “That’s a tulip, Vin,” he mumbled, rubbing his already tired eyes. “It’s, uh… red. And it’s got… petals. And it’s a flower.” Great job, dumbass.

Vinnie just blinked at him, then turned back to the tulip. Sam thought he was admiring it until--before he could even react--Vinnie grabbed the head of the plant and stuffed the flower straight into his mouth.

“Dude—!” Sam’s eyes widened, and he immediately reached forward, prying the petals from his son’s chubby little hands before going in for the mouth “What the hell, you can’t just eat shit like that!”

After Sam threw the slightly wet from saliva petals, he turned to his son, who, of course, felt utterly betrayed. Lower lip wobbled, eyes getting all glossy like he was about to break into cries at sam's harsh, sudden tone.

Sam panicked. “Oh, damn--okay, okay, chill, man, I’m not mad,” he rushed, patting Vinnie’s head with shaky hands. “It’s just--" he cupped this little face "flowers aren’t food, y’know? We eat real food. Like… like waffles. And… whipped cream. Yeah?”

Vinnie sniffled. “W’ffle?”

Sam nearly collapsed in relief. Thanks the higher power “Yeah, dude. Waffles. You love those.”

Vinnie stared at him, then grinned. A full, teethy, drooly grin, like Sam had just told him the best information of the universe, immediately forgetting how he just wanted to chew on the plant

Sam exhaled, shaking his head. “Gosh,” he muttered, picking up his son and balancing him on his hip. This kid was gonna give him gray hair before he's twenty

TAG LIST: @kingdomhate @divineani @haydensprettyprincess @skyguys-princess @catnipaddict @heartscone @haydensbbg @inneedsoffanfics @jediavengers @literally-izzy @anisluvrgirl @slutforfinnickodair @xhunnybeeex @fuckmyskywalker @gallerygourmet @ysrjune @anakinskwkler @bimbo-baggins17-deactivated2025 @cookybananas @emotionallybruisedx @diorvalentina @sevinax @throughparisallthroughrome @aniiuv @ritosparty @ninastyless @lily-strnlo @thesassypadawan @awhhayden @sydkneez @anisangeldust @l1ttle-misssunsh1ne @anakinca @rubiesarepretty @luluartpop

[sergeantbarnessdoll]

Christmas Hats and Magnets » Bucky Barnes/Winter Soldier

December 7th

Pairings: Husband/Dad!Bucky Barnes x Wife/Mom!Reader with daughter Isabella and Alpine

Summary: Bucky’s and Y/N’s 4 year old daughter gives Christmas hats to her parents and puts magnets on her daddy’s metal arm.

Warnings: Fluff, language, nothing but cuteness, hugs and kisses, cuddling, nicknames for daughter (princess, baby girl), pet names for reader (doll)

Thank you to @buckys-wintersoldier for this adorable Christmas idea!❤️💚

Written on my phone so sorry if there’s any mistakes or typos.

GIF IS NOT MINE! Credit goes to the creators.

❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️

“Mommy! Daddy! Wake up! It’s Christmas time!” Isabella says excitedly, jumping up and down on yours and Bucky’s bed.

You opened your eyes to see Isabella wearing a Santa hat. You sat up and pulled her on your lap and gave her kisses.

“Daddy’s still sleeping. We need to be quiet.” You whisper.

“Daddy sleeping.” She whispers back.

You carefully got out of bed with Isabella in your arms so you guys didn’t wake up Bucky. You took Izzy to the living room so she can watch TV and play while you made breakfast.

“Do you want pancakes or waffles?” You asked her.

“Waffles please!” Isabella says politely with a smile.

“Good choice!” You smiled.

You went to the kitchen and got everything you needed to make breakfast. A few minutes later, you felt a little hand tugging your -Bucky’s- shirt. You looked down to see Isabella looking up at you.

“Can I have a juice box please?” She asks.

“Of course, baby girl.” You walked to the fridge and opened it. “What flavor do you want? Apple, Orange, or Fruit Punch?” You asked.

“Fruit Punch.” She says.

You grabbed a Fruit Punch juice box, opening it for her and gave it to her.

“Thank you, mommy!” Isabella says, taking it from your hand.

“You’re welcome. Try not to spill it.” You say.

Isabella nodded and went back to the living room to play and watch TV. Another few minutes go by when Izzy comes back in the kitchen.

“Do you need something else, baby girl?” You asked her.

“No. I have something for you!” Isabella hands you a Santa hat. “I have one for daddy too and I put one on Alpine!” She tells you.

You smiled, taking it from her hand and put it on.

“Now we’re twins!” She says, clapping her little hands before running back to the living room.

You went back to making breakfast. A little bit later, you went in the living room to get Isabella for breakfast, but you didn’t see her in there. You assumed she went to her bedroom for something or to play. You went upstairs and poked your head in her bedroom. You furrowed your eyebrows when you didn’t see her in there. That’s when you heard little giggles coming from yours and Bucky’s bedroom. You walked down the hallway to the bedroom to see Isabella sitting next to her sleeping daddy and putting Christmas magnets on his metal arm. You bit your bottom lip to keep yourself from laughing. Bucky’s eyes fluttered opened when he heard giggling. He seen Isabella sitting next to him, continuing to put magnets on his metal arm.

“What are you doing, princess?” Bucky asks, rubbing his eyes.

“Making your arm look Christmasy!” She says.

Bucky lifted his metal arm to see a variety of different Christmas magnets on it.

“I also have this for you!” She says, handing him a Santa hat.

“Thank you, princess.” Bucky smiles and put it on.

“Me and Alpine have one too!” Isabella pointed at Alpine who was sleeping on her cat tree. “Mommy does too!” She says, pointed at you.

“All three of you look beautiful with them on.” He says, kissing her forehead.

You smiled and walked towards the bed and got on it.

“Good morning, Mr. Claus.” You kissed Bucky’s lips.

“Good morning, Mrs. Claus.” Bucky kisses you back.

“Hey!” Isabella shouted, getting yours and Bucky’s attention. “I’m still here!” She pouted, crossing her little arms over her chest.

Bucky grabbed her and put her on his lap. You and Bucky attacked her with kisses and tickles causing her to let out squeals and giggles.

“Alright, alright. That’s enough. Let’s go downstairs and eat breakfast before it gets cold.” You say.

“Mommy made waffles!” Isabella gets off of her daddy’s lap and carefully got off the bed. “Hurry up before I eat them all!” She shouts on her way out of the bedroom.

Bucky got out of bed and ran up behind her, picking her up causing her to squeal and giggle again. You followed them to the kitchen. You pour two cups of coffee, one for you and one for Bucky. You went to the dining room and gave Bucky his coffee and Isabella her breakfast. You went back to the kitchen for yours and Bucky breakfast and went back to the dining room. You took a seat next to Bucky.

“This looks delicious, doll.” Bucky compliments making you smile.

“Thank you, Buck.” You kissed his stubbly cheek.

Bucky turned his head to capture your lips in a kiss making you smile against his lips.

“No kissing! I’m trying to eat my waffles!” Isabella shouts making you and Bucky laugh at her cuteness.

❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️💚❤️

-Bucky’s Doll

[bemusedlybespectacled]

I do think the "you know what he did when I told him I loved him?" exchange is a bit jarring from a writing perspective BUT I am putting my Watsonian hat on to darn this plot hole and I am thinking that Stede didn't know know, he just put it together from context right then and there.

like, Stede definitely knows Ed shot Izzy in the leg. even people who weren't there, like Lucius, know that Ed is responsible for maiming Izzy, and I would imagine that this was an important point in the discussion/vote over whether Ed should be banished or not. there's no way for him not to know if he's talked to the crew about Ed at all, and we know he has because we see the start of that conversation.

nor is it a surprise to him that Izzy loves Ed. outside of Ed saying Izzy's jealous and Stede asking if he's doing a victory lap, I think Stede lowkey thought Ed and Izzy were in a relationship in Season 1, due to comments like "trouble in paradise?" in 1x06.

and the question comes literally just after Izzy sits down to rest his leg, and Stede outright mentions the leg (bitchily) so the setup is very clear.

like, okay, if I spent several hours talking about the weird black comedy surrounding my college roommate's death and funeral, and then later in the conversation we started talking about regional restaurants, and I was like, "hey, you know when I was last in a Waffle House?", you can probably infer from the way I'm saying it and the context of the previous conversation that the answer is probably "after your college roommate's funeral." it'd be really weird if I said it that way and the answer was like, "last week, it was super uneventful and I go there all the time" or "when I was two years old, I don't remember it at all."

so yeah, I don't think there needed to have been an explicit conversation about it for Stede to infer it.

[bookishjules]

what do you think Izzy was like post cohf but pre tftsa? bring on the angst

okay i can't promise this will be coherent, but..

the first thing that comes to mind is angry. like.. i don't think i need to contextualize this for you, but just to get us in the headspace.. she really just gave her heart away. put the emphasis on any word in that sentence and it not only makes sense but just feels heavier and heavier. she fell in love in spite of herself, in spite of her fears and insecurities, in spite of her efforts and determination. and why would that not make her feel like the biggest fucking idiot?? she knew. she knew that falling in love would only result in pain and heartbreak and that that was a life she didn't want to live. and yet she did all that anyway. she put trust in simon, trust in the universe, and of course men and the universe will do what they do.. so can she really fault anyone but her own naive self?

she externalizes that anger too, snapping at her family, being especially brutal when she comes across demons during patrol etc. and the worst part is, that that anger doesn't take the other emotions away, it doesn't eradicate the love she felt for simon, that she still very much feels for him. she thinks of him and her heart hurts and it only makes her all the more angry. i think she waffles between being glad she never truly said the words "i love you" and regretting it. because now those words are just curdling inside her, a constant reminder of what she had and lost, and it makes her sick. like no, she never gave them away, but that also means she has to harbor the truth of them in her stomach. the truth of how much she's come to need him, of how every time she feels herself breaking down because of the heaviness of reality, it's his arms she craves.

she tries to forget. tries to move on like she's always been able to, tries to deny him like she's never been able to, but it doesn't work. of course it doesn't work. she tries to go out, to kiss boys, but all it does is pull her closer to tears. and it feels a little like she's the one being disloyal. because her heart still belongs to simon. because she never actually broke up with him. he may not remember that they are still together, but it's not like he wanted to ghost her. he loved her. and if he knew her.. he still would. but physicality has always helped her forget, helped her push those strong emotions deep inside. so she trains and she goes dancing, and she even lets a couple guys take her home. but no matter how intense the physical side gets, the emotions just rear their heads even stronger.

she's changed so much since meeting simon, since falling in love with him. and suddenly she isn't satisfied by hookups and bandaids. she wants someone to listen to her, to see her. someone to protect, someone to hold her hand. someone worth fighting for. she wants simon. she worries she's ruined. she worries she'll never be satisfied if he isn't simon. how could she find that again? would she even want to?

and i say she wants someone to talk to, but she definitely is not opening up to the people who are trying to be there for her. she closes herself off until she can properly mask her emotions, but her brothers aren't fooled by her act. clary has the best success when talking to izzy. not because she can offer consolation in any way, but because she gets it. because they can comfort each other in the loss of this person who meant the most to both of them. and when starving out the emotions doesn't seem to be working, izzy decides maybe .. maybe she should try the opposite. so clary starts to tell her stories. she talks about simon the way she grew up with him, talks about his favorite subjects in school and how he cried at his dad's funeral and the day he came home from his first guitar lesson. and izzy knows it helps clary too, to have someone who will appreciate these stories as well. who will appreciate a glimpse into the world clary lost.

but of course that also makes izzy feel even less deserving of the sense of absolute loss she feels when it comes to simon. like she had this guy in her life for what.. four months? why is she reacting so strongly?? why must this love have such a chokehold on her?? but the way she opened up to simon was something so unique and new that.. it wasn't just losing him. in a way, she'd lost a piece of herself too, the piece she'd never thought she'd give away. and fuck. it had felt so good. in all the anxiety.. it had felt good to be vulnerable with simon. it had been a piece of her that she'd relented. not freely given at first, but by the end.. it was absolutely his. and he took it with him. there was no getting that piece of her back.

no matter how hard she'd tried, she ended up with a man who hurt her, just like her mother warned. but she doesn't want to be like her father, either, marrying someone he doesn't truly love, mistreating them in that apathy.. not after what she felt with simon. not now that she knows what true love and heartbreak are. so she thinks well.. i guess i'll have to live off sex alone.

but like i said before, sex doesn't work. alec says she'll find someone, jace tries to distract her, any effort her mom makes is completely brushed aside.. and eventually she finds herself hoping. it's naive. its fucking dumb. but she starts.. stalking simon. just a little. she attends his shows, and she pays attention. she talks to people who have interacted with him since edom, and she pays attention. is there a piece inside him that's broken too? could he remember me? remember us? how bad would it be to just approach him. to kiss him and remind him of the truth.

she expresses these thoughts one night, after having had a little too much to drink at one of simon's shows and going to crash at magnus and alec's place. and magnus listens. he doesn't want to give her false hope, but he also doesn't want her to sink so far into this train of thought that she ends up approaching mundane simon in such a self-destructive way. so he tells her that if they found enough proof, they could try to jog his memory.

then izzy find the poster days after the band changes their name to the mortal instruments and the rest is history..

[weirdgenetic-fuckup]

HIIII I’m here to tell you and everyone else that I woke up this morning after putting a picture of Izzy on my wall and it’s at face height so when I woke up this morning (and forgot it was there) it scared me

-💋

I wanna laugh but one time, this is unrelated I just remembered it, I was making myself eggo waffles and put my forehead against the cabinet above the toaster thinking "this thing is gonna pop and it's gonna scare me" and then it popped and got scared and bashed my forehead into the cabinet at the exact moment my sister turned the corner so all she heard was the waffle pop and then watched me bash my face into the cabinet

[ams-puppy]

is sugar and waffles the name for the family au? :o if so, it’s really cute! Edgar’s so adorable in this au, i think him calculester would be great friends btw

yes! and I'm sure you're right!

-Lain

[skyland2703]

HUH

What does Javelia do in the situation that Waffles gets stuck on a roomba.

Izzy bought the room and taped a knife to it probably.

Javi took the knife off and just went “Free roomba :))))))))))”

Idk what a roomba is

[izzyeffinhands]

“Izzy! I realized why you’re the perfect baker…” A brief pause. “Because you’re so KNEADY.” Giggles like a madman. “It’s okay, dough. I still love you a waffle lot. You’re my butter half.”

“ …. “

“ ……….. “

“ ………………….”

“ Get out. “

@avastyetwats

[skyhawkstragedy]

T’kor’s waffling is giving me Cirie/Izzy ptsd-

[mavigator]

i gave izzy their waffles and forgot to give them a fork and i walk in on them eating syrupy waffles with their bare hands ASK ME FOR A FORK?

[doks-aux]

Fic: Dead Men Take No Dares

Fandom: Our Flag Means Death

Characters: Izzy Hands, Edward Teach, Stede Bonnet, Lucius Springs, Ivan, Fang, Nathaniel Buttons, Crew of the Revenge

Relationships: Izzy Hands & Edward Teach, Izzy Hands & Crew of the Revenge, Izzy Hands & Ivan & Fang

Rating: PG-13/Teen

Content/Warnings: Truth or Dare, friendship (existing, mending, and growing), humor, and a callback to one of my favorite jokes from Season 1

Summary: “Fun, huh?” He breathed in and out once very deliberately then opened his eyes to look at Fang, face carefully neutral. “All right. I can do fun.”

--

Izzy is strong-armed into a game of Truth or Dare and decides to play by the rules.

Notes: Written for the zine Above All Else: An Appreciation of Izzy Hands in 2023 and set in a possible post-Season 1 future where everyone is trying to get along and no one is very good at it. (Except Fang, of course.) Written before the premiere of Season 2 and has not been edited to reflect any of that updated canon. The only difference between this text and what appears in the zine is the correction of three minor grammatical errors that will haunt me for the rest of my natural life.

Word Count: 1368

Read on AO3

--

Israel Hands was seven minutes and fifteen seconds into his frantic search for his captains or, indeed, any sign of life on the Revenge, when he finally heard Bonnet's voice ring through the halls of the gundeck.

“All right! Perhaps we ought to revisit and revise our ‘no more than two truths before a dare’ rule to ‘at least two truths before a dare.’”

The conversation was coming from the jam room, and Izzy hastened his steps in that direction, taking note of each voice that joined in.

“But then we’d barely get any dares!” Black Pete whined.

“I’m fine with that.” That was Spriggs, vaguely distressed as always. “I’m great.”

“Uh, it’s not Truth or Dare without any dares.” Black Pete again.

“Maybe that can just be a rule for Captain Ed and Wee John.” Roach then.

“Sorry about that,” Feeney said at the same time that Edward chirped, “Sorry, mate,” neither sounding particularly sorry at all. Was the whole fucking crew in there?

“Now, we don’t want to single anyone out...” Bonnet waffled--prompting a small chorus of “Yes, we do”--just as Izzy stepped through the door.

“Captain... s?” he asked, catching himself before he forgot to pluralize. He looked first to Edward then to Bonnet, taking in the room’s remaining occupants in between. It was, of course, the whole fucking crew. “Wh--?”

“Hey, Iz-dog!” Edward bellowed cheerfully, springing to his feet and barrelling toward Izzy with enthusiasm he had not anticipated.

“Oh, no, Izzy’s here!” Spriggs gasped, also jumping to fling himself at Izzy.

Edward reached him first, gripping his bicep and tugging excitedly. “You’ve gotta get in on this, mate. We’re--”

“I guess we have to stop having fun now,” Spriggs’ exaggerated lamentations rose over the rest of Edward’s sentence. “So sad.” Undermining his words, he grabbed Izzy’s other shoulder and leaned in to hiss, “What took you so long? There’ve been three fires already.”

“Fire?” Izzy darted his eyes between Edward and the boy before scanning the room more thoroughly. “Where is there a fucking fi--?”

“It’s out, Boss,” Ivan announced, and Izzy whipped his head around to see him stomping out the last embers of a fucking fire.

“Why is there--?”

“In my defense,” Edward cut in, snapping Izzy’s attention back to him, bright-eyed and grinning, “I was dared.”

Izzy held Edward’s unwaveringly mischievous gaze for a moment, just in case an explanation would be offered unprompted.

It was not.

“What are you--?” he began, valiantly suppressing most of a weary sigh.

“We’re playing Truth or Dare,” Jim interrupted this time, annoyed, though whether with him or Edward, Izzy wasn’t sure. He was getting whiplash all the same.

“What the fuck is--?” But Izzy cut himself off this time with a frustrated shake of his head, a growl dying in his throat. That one he actually knew, and it wasn’t the point. “Never mind. Edward, wh--?”

“You should play, too, Iz! It’s a blast!” The implish gleam in his captain’s eyes dimmed just slightly, his smile turning sheepish. “Didn’t mean not to invite you. It was a spur-of-the-moment thing.”

That wasn’t the point. It was not within five hundred nautical miles of the fucking point. But the genuine apology in Edward’s tone took Izzy off guard all the same, stayed his tongue while he allowed himself to appreciate it.

“Oh, of course,” Bonnet butted in before Izzy could find his words again, which was marginally better than interrupting him, but that margin was about as thin as Izzy’s patience. “You can squeeze right in, we haven’t been playing long.”

“Three fires,” Spriggs mouthed silently in Izzy’s peripheral vision.

“I don’t care about your fucking game.” It came out with more bite than Izzy meant it to even if it was true. (He was trying to be less of a dick. They all were. They were bad at it, but they were trying. It just was not the point right now.) “Edward, listen. Wh--?”

“Aw, don’t be like that, Iz. Play with us!”

“Edward, I need to--”

“Join the game, and you can ask him anything you like,” Bonnet said, chipper and smug. “When it’s your turn.”

Edward squashed Izzy’s delusions that he might consider reason by immediately nodding along. “There ya go, Iz, just wait your turn.”

On second thought, fuck the both of them.

“That settles it! Have a seat, Izzy,” Bonnet continued like he didn’t even notice Izzy’s heroic attempts to explode him with his mind. “We’ll do a few rounds so you can see how the game is played.”

“I don’t--”

“And then you can have a turn!”

“Captains--”

“Just let it happen, Boss,” Ivan muttered, calm and commiserating, throwing an arm across Izzy’s back. “Come sit with me and Fang.”

Not wanting to fight because they weren’t supposed to be doing that sort of thing anymore (and because Ivan could scruff him like a cat if he chose), Izzy allowed himself to be led to the bit of floor claimed by Fang, who beamed and scooted over to make room for them.

“Hi, Izzy,” Fang greeted as Izzy sat beside him. Izzy grimaced in reply, careful not to shift his weight onto his bad foot as he settled on the floor. Ivan sat on Izzy’s other side, bracketing him between his old colleagues.

“Does anyone remember whose turn we were on?” Bonnet asked, and conversation erupted through the room, everyone talking over each other while Izzy straightened his spine and tried to catch Edward’s attention through the chaos.

“Anyone who doesn’t love arson,” Spriggs groused, flopping in defeat beside Black Pete.

“Seconding no arson,” Boodhari agreed.

Frenchie laughed. “That’s not a big number on this boat, babes.”

“May I have a turn?” The Swede raised his hand. “I will not choose fire.”

And on and on the inane chatter continued, Izzy squirming in impatience as Edward looked everywhere but at him. He was nearly ready to snap when he felt a gentle touch at his back.

“It’s not so bad, Boss,” Fang murmured kindly, giving him that soft-eyed look that Izzy never knew how to respond to since he’d promised to stop yanking his beard. “Give it a chance. Maybe you’ll have fun.”

Izzy bit the inside of his cheek before he could spit something ugly. He clenched his fists until his fingernails dug into his palms, squeezed his eyes shut until he saw stars, and tensed every muscle in his body until he had no choice but to relax.

“Fun, huh?” He breathed in and out once very deliberately then opened his eyes to look at Fang, face carefully neutral. “All right. I can do fun.”

He would wait his turn.

Fang smiled like he was proud of him, and Izzy did not tell him to fuck off. Bonnet got the game started up again, and Izzy observed the proceedings dutifully. There didn’t seem to be any sort of logic to how the turns were taken, the rules were clearly made up as they went, and the truths asked and dares accepted were as ridiculous and reckless as he would have expected. Nevertheless, he was grudgingly impressed that the Swede could contort his limbs into a pretzel with such ease.

Finally, Bonnet looked to Izzy and spread his arms out with his customarily unwarranted pomp. “Now it’s your turn, Izzy. Ask anyone anything you’d like.”

“Fine.” Izzy looked Edward straight in the eye. “Truth or Dare?”

“Truth,” Edward answered, still constrained by the new dare limit.

“Who’s steering the fucking ship, Edward?”

“The fuck do you mean? Buttons is. Right, Buttons?”

Izzy watched realization dawn in Edward's eyes, his slow, horrified turn to the wall, where Buttons had been standing the whole time.

Buttons, very much not steering the ship, stared back, unblinking. “Olivia wanted to watch the game,” he said of the seagull perched on his head. “She’s a yen for hot gossip.”

“...SHIT!”

Edward tore out of the jam room, most of the crew stampeding after him. Izzy remained seated, Ivan and Fang still at his side and Buttons still against the wall. Under the thunder of footsteps and bickering and Bonnet shrieking in panic, Izzy smiled.

“You were right, Fang. That was fun.”