#ughhggh

[coffee2029]

I love them 🍽️

[pastadoughie]

ok but b4 i love myself i have 2 first become good enough to be lovable. this is a healthy and unbiased mindset.

[confusedmothboy]

hello hello. i would love to hear your thoughts on how you think travis’s dynamic with his mother(and father) was pre-crash! and also with his mother post-crash. no pressure to answer this i’m just Thinking about it now

YESSSS the martinez family is so interesting to me and its never touched on like at all

just a disclaimer thers a lot of speculation around them that delves more into stereotypical hispanic gender roles that probably influenced their dynamic and i am listening to all of it BUT im also white as fuck so i'll be speaking from my experience that obviously. doesnt include that

all the yapping is under the cut

in the first frames, travis isnt even in the shot. coach martinez hands the bag over to javi, and the camera pans over to travis, who's standing just brooding. i think this kinda immediately hits us with "javi is the golden child" or at least the only one acknowledged in a positive manner with his parents.

when it finally does pan over to travis, he's standing pretty far from everyone, showing the audience the distance from the rest of his family he tries to keep. he could help, but doesnt. i think its interesting how coach martinez tasked his 12 year old with loading up the car instead of his 15 year old whos perfectly capable ykyk. i think this sets up a lot of the resentment we see with travis both towards his dad and towards javi. javi, for whatever reason, is already seen as more capable by their dad than travis is.

this scene is usually skipped way over because of what comes right after it, and you cant really see it in the single screenshot, but javi completely shrugs off his mom's attempt to hug him goodbye. preteen angst? maybe. mirroring coach martinez and/or travis? ohhhh most definitley.

except coach martinez knows that in certain situations, appearance mattters. javi can shy away from parental affection, travis can be off doing whatever, but a husband should kiss his wife goodbye. except she SO does not want that. people speculate dv, affairs, just a general unhappy marriage, but i think its more indicative from a narrative point that this is a traditional family. mom, dad, two brothers just a few years apart, thats like. the goal family pretty much everywhere. they are absolutely nuclear. i feel like the lack of divorce thats very needed here can imply a few things, but overall, we know that this is an appearance-heavy, traditional, "normal" household.

travis gets in the car right after that, neither him nor his mother attempting to say their goodbyes. again, its hard to know whats intentional and whats just the script instructions saying [act like a moody teenager]. whatever.

travis clearly doesnt like his father, saying that coach martinez never even liked him, saying he was a shit dad, all that at his father's gravesite. lets just take a moment to acknowledge how batshit it is that coach martinez works at the same school that travis is relentlessly fucking harassed at and seemingly does nothing about it. i see him being the "getting bullied scares the weakness right out of someone" type, hence why we can assume he never tries to help his son out. he approaches coaching the same way but this isnt a coach martinez analysis this is about travis (and javi)

in these kinds of family dynamics, usually theres a "safer" parent, like you got one you cant ever talk to and then the other who you have a bit more connection with. but neither is trustworthy, because in the back of your mind there's always something nagging that "[safe parent] is still putting up with [other parent]'s behavior and doesn't try to do anything about it, even when it impacts me". because of this, i cant imagine travis having any sort of healthy dynamic with his mom either. in houses like these, sometimes its easier to blame the safe parent when they dont rush to your defense.

on javi: coach martinez obviously respects javi more. or at the very least is easier on him than on travis, most definitely because javi is the younger of the two. that's probably why coach martinez's behavior and travis's attitude dont rub of on javi as much as they could have. notice how javi's the only one that their mother tries to hug goodbye? notice how travis, being a 15 year old who's been bullied and ignored by people at school and at home, is desperate for physical affection the second nat starts to fall for him out in the wilderness? yeah. im sending brain waves over to you rn to convey what i cant exactly put into words. only when travis is out of his home and without both of his parents can he begin to deconstruct the resentment he built against javi. i also think that him being so aggressive with javi right after the crash was a form of preservation for javi's mental state. travis wanted javi to not only admit that their dad was awful (validating travis's experience), but also to protect javi and force him to build the same walls against their dad to save him from the adverse effects of oh i dunno seeing him impaled on a tree?? in travis's mind, until nat and him have that conversation, it's easier and safer to just say "nah i always hated him" and move on. theres a lot i could say about the realism in the martinez brother's dynamic but this is so long already and i have to get to school like 10 minutes ago

overall the family dynamic between these four actually drives me insane. both because we're shown so much and so little and OHHHH its delicious and awful and far too close to home

[luvologyy]

Is the mouthwashing fsndom dead?🙁 IM STILL HERE..🙏🙏

[thehypnone]

I want. not to exist

[heroesfromtheashes-a]

Sigh.. I'm fighting being exhausted despite the sleep..

[xx-midnight-calico-cat-xx]

Do I do the responsible but sucky thing or just go home and deal with it another day…

[73826392729126812628262926292729]

your trauma isn't my fucking problem, leave me alone

[daydrinking75]

fuck she tried to ft me during my dentist appointment im rly asking god to get fucked aren't i

i love my best friend 🫶🏻

[mrsoharaa]

imagining Choso focusing sooo intently on painting your cute nails; delicately holds your hand in his, brows fixed firmly, pupils direct and in tone with every movement he made with a slight tongue poke prodding at the corner of his mouth. Totally in the zone and wanting to make sure his queen's nails are absolutely perfect, no smeared polish or anything. And that simply fills your heart with so much joy and love for the adorable man tending to you like you were everything to him (which you are btw!) ♡

"Am I...doing this right, Y/n?"

"You're doing such a wonderful job baby" (that stirs something deep and...fervent, within Choso's tense body 👀)

[luminarrie]

when this happens and lowkey triggers my gender dysphoria because i just got reminded that ill never be a real man

[alonsolobotomy]

im watching the craft rn and nancy is sooooooo 😭😭🙏🙏🛐🛐🛐

[jordydrawsmerch]

.....

Man fuck you temu also please don't shop on these sites ALSO they totally stole the art directly from my photograph so they look funky as hell and they also are shitty quality and not the right type of plating either. Look at how they massacred my boys

[cemetaryg1rl]

so tired but so turned on 😵‍💫

[aroacedavestrider]

its been a month and none of these stupid fucks im applying for are accepting my applications but we stay silly. gonna bring this back cause i was hopeful with one app but i got #Rejected again today 💪🏼‼️🔥💯‼️💪🏼💯🔥

Once Again i look at yall with my huge round eyes cause my credit card bill from before is suddenly an issue what with the No Income problem .

thanks so much to those who have already shared and sent me a lil smth i appreciate it so so much you have no idea

i got 🔥💥fired💥🔥

bluh bluh chronically fatigued aroace trans dude with audhd osdd etc etc

today i learned the hospital i worked at doesnt give sick days and staying home with a 101 degree fever gets you written up. fucking crazy right its a hospital

ignore how wrinkled that shit is i crumpled it into a ball out of stress lmao. anyway

straight to it: i just lost my benefits a month before i get to pay $17k in college tuition ‼️‼️💯💯 WHEEE

ik this is tumblr were all broke so i get it dont feel pressured but if anyone wouldge like to perhaps give me a dollar or something that would be swagful. or reblog thats also good

venmeaux: @ // kjohnson626

zelle: dm me ill give you my email

peighpal (IGNORE deadname): @ // turntechqodhcad

[youredreamingofroo]

If you get this, answer w/ three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs. anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog!

thank you for ANOTHER ask Kirsty!

ive got god awful memory so forgive me if i re-mention some fact ive said before OJHDN

1, My favorite kids game website was Friv! I never really played coolmathgames or girlsgogames or any of those other ones, Friv was EVERYTHINGGG to me 😵‍💫

2, I don't know how obvious it is (probably not at all), But I'm a MAJOR nerd for linguistics, etymology, languages/learning languages, dialects, accents, etc! I LOVEEE learning about words, I love accents, I love learning about obscure/lesser known dialects and languages, if there's any way to my heart in 5 seconds flat, its the aforementioned things LMAO

3, I guess I'll bring this up with my recent clangen hyperfixation,, I was a huge Warrior Cats fan as a kid!! At the time there were around 70-75-ish books and I think I read over 60 of them in a couple months! I'd be finishing a WC book like every week or every couple days 😭 Later on, I would play Warrior Cats roleplay games [on roblox] and make my own Warrior cat OCs,, I truly miss that era of my life </3