#tw mentions of childbirth

[lifewouldbebetteronmars]

Title & Lyrics from Hey Jude by The Beatles

Part of my TLH A/B/O AU

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Hey Jude, Don’t Be Afraid

Matthew stared down at the little bundle in his arms. His son. The little boy who’d just spent the last nine months inside his belly, kicking to his heart’s content.

He was finally here. And Matthew didn’t know how he felt about it.

The pregnancy itself felt like a total blur, there was no morning sickness or terrible cravings, it was by all standards an easy pregnancy. Had it truly been nine months? He couldn’t say for certain.

But some time must have passed, because if it hadn’t, his son wouldn’t be in his arms right now.

If Matthew was completely honest, the biggest thing he remembered about his entire pregnancy was the day he found out.

It had all started out as a regular check up, completely routine. There’d been no symptoms, no warnings. There hadn’t been any nausea or fatigue.

Matthew had been perfectly fine. Until he wasn’t.

The doctor had done a routine blood test, just as a precaution, she had said to him with a kind smile.

The blood test was routine but the results weren’t.

He’d been in the car when he found out, listening to some old Beatles songs for the nostalgia of it, when the phone call had come.

He was pregnant.

The doctor’s words had gone in one ear and out the other, he vaguely remembered being recommended a obstetrician. But mostly he remembers feeling numb.

It had taken awhile for the news to set in and when it did, the first thing Matthew wanted to do was drink.

He was sober almost ten years then and it hadn’t been easy, but nothing had wanted to make him drink more than that news.

He couldn’t drink, so he was numb. He just simply stared off into space as Paul McCartney’s voice crooned the lyrics of Hey Jude through his speakers, as if telling him everything would be okay.

Everything else after that was all blurred. Nothing had been particularly memorable when his mindset had been as dark as it was. Still is, if he’s still being honest.

Matthew spent the first half of his pregnancy acting on autopilot, just going through the motions of life, not processing a single thing.

It wasn’t until Alastair Lightwood-Carstairs, of all people, questioned him about it, having already had children himself and knew what a pregnant Omega looked like. He had twins, something Matthew couldn’t even imagine for himself.

That was the moment that Matthew finally let himself break down and cry for the first time in months. Alastair comforted him in his own way, with pats on the back and just letting him cry it out.

It was after he had calmed down that Alastair tentatively broached the subject of if Matthew had considered his options.

His options? It had slipped his mind that he even had options besides keeping the baby.

He was passed twenty-four weeks by then and the pregnancy was considered viable, so it was too late to consider an abortion, but adoption, was still a valid option.

And it turned out to be the best option for him. Matthew wasn’t ready to be a parent, not now, maybe not ever. He was sure he loved the baby inside of him, but how could he truly know? But maybe there were some parents out there who could love that baby more than he could, parents who actually wanted to be parents.

So for the next sixteen weeks, Matthew looked at the files of so many prospective parents. Until he found the one.

A lovely couple in Cheshire who had a nice house with a yard and two Golden Retrievers. It was the perfect fit.

He hadn’t told his brother or sisters (on account of them either being an asshole or too young to understand) about the pregnancy and his plan, but his parents had been accepting, happy with his decision, as long as it was made him happy.

Not that his friends had seen it that way.

James and Cordelia were the most upset, not understanding in the slightest how he could have kept a secret like that from them, especially since he was just “giving the baby away” in their words. He hadn’t really spoken to them since.

Grace had been accepting too, taking his news by squeezing his shoulder with a sad smile in the way she always did. She hadn’t quite been the same since Christopher’s death, but then again, none of them had.

Thomas (and Alastair), of course, had been the most supportive, even offering to be at the hospital with him when he went into labor.

Anna and Ari were supportive too, having known the hardships of adoption form both ends. He probably would have even considered giving his baby to them had it not been too hard for him.

All of that led to today, the day his son was born.

Matthew had wondered how he had ever doubted before the love he had for his son, the minute they had placed him on his chest.

He loved him immediately, a love he had never known before. All of his doubts were gone and he almost changed his mind. Almost.

If his first thought had been that he loved him, Matthew’s second thought had been how loved his son would be.

It would be impossible not too.

He was the loveliest baby Matthew had ever seen. All blonde curls and rosy cheeks. He was almost cherubic, a peaceful expression on his face as he slept.

His new parents would be arriving soon for him, Matthew knew, and the thought made him sad in a way he hadn’t thought it would.

And so he shifted the little boy in arms and began to hum a familiar tune, one that had stuck with him throughout the last nine months.

Hey Jude, don't be afraid

You were made to go out and get her

The minute you let her under your skin,

Then you begin to make it better

Jude, that was the name of his son, at least in his mind. It wouldn’t be his forever, but it was his for now.

And anytime you feel the pain, hey Jude, refrain,

Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

For well you know that it's a fool who plays it cool

By making his world a little colder

Jude shifted in his sleep, nose and forehead scrunching up. Matthew lightly kissed his nose. “I love you, Jude.” he whispered to his son, only loud enough of the two of them.

“Math, it’s time. Are you ready?” A familiar voice said from the doorway.

Matthew pressed a kiss to Jude’s forehead and held him close for the last time. He felt tears welling in his eyes but he fought them back.

“Yes, I’m ready.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Before the angst begins, a little treat (but is it really?)

Tagging:

@tessherongraystairs

@petalsofaflower-shutupthomas

@littlx-songbxrd

@wagner-fell

[whotfelsewantedtobelynnyx]

Of all the theories as to how Carmilla and her daughters found eachother in Hell (adoption, reuniting after they died, one or all three being Hellborn, ect;), I think my personal favorite is the one where Carmilla was either pregnant when she died or later gave birth to a child she miscarried when she was alive.

But whether or not that’s true, one of my favorite crack theories/headcanons about Carmilla being pregnant in Hell is how absolutely weird the other Overlords would be about it- because let’s be real, they would absolutely be weird about it. Maybe supportive and weird, but weird.

Zestial, nervously following Carmilla around: My darling. My own heart. I beg of thou, please, for just a moment.

Carmilla, still stubbornly walking around in her ridiculously sharp shoes: I’M FINE.

Zestial, who’s been trying to get her to sit down or at least change her shoes for over an hour: 0,_0

Rosie, crouched at her side with a glass of something red and questionable: I’m telling you, honey, just try this. It’ll cure that morning sickness in a jiffy.

Carmilla, curled up on her bathroom floor: …it disturbs me that I’m nauseous enough to actually be considering this.

Zestial comes to her rescue and shoos Rosie out to go make her some (GINGER) tea before Carmilla can do something she’ll regret.

Alastor, gazing suspiciously: Why on earth is your abdomen moving like that? Is something trying to break out?

Carmilla, too exhausted to deal with this: That movement is my baby kicking, Alastor.

Alastor: Pardon? You mean to tell me that one can see that on the outside? Eugh.

Carmilla, glaring at him: You are so lucky you’re not worth getting up for.

- Rosie insists on throwing her a baby shower. Vox and Alastor get kicked out for fighting and are forced to put together the IKEA furniture for the nursery as punishment.

- I seriously doubt this lot can build and work an ultrasound machine, so something like this is likely.

Carmilla, slowly coming to after giving birth: Mmmh…?

Rosie, happily bouncing one baby in her arms: Oh good, she’s up! Congratulations, sweetie. You have two beautiful daughters 🥰

Carmilla: ….

Zestial, who’s gently cradling the other: Carmilla…? Is something the matter?

Carmilla: …there’s really two of them. I thought I was hallucinating.

BONUS:

Fun fact- some scientists say cats have sensitive enough hearing that they can hear babies’ heartbeats within their mother’s bodies.

Husk, staring at Carmilla:

Carmilla, who’s still processing that she’s pregnant and hasn’t begun telling anyone else: …is something wrong?

Husk, ears bristling slightly: h o w m a n y h e a r t s d o y o u h a v e ?

[torchflies]

Hi TG Fandom!

@xtherainbowconnectionx mentioned Texan Ice to me and I cannot get him out of my head. 

Just, a Tom Kazansky who was raised out in Nowhere, Texas and didn't really wear shoes until he was old enough for school. 

An Ice who was called Junie or Junior growing up and the only son of a bullfighter and a barrel racer who fell in love at the local Rodeo. 

Maybe he was the only child of a mother who died too soon, died bringing him into the world too early because it was 1959 and they lived so far from town. He was small and pink and Tom Kazansky Sr. was so desperate that he popped his newborn son in a basket and put him in the oven to keep him warm. 

He gives his name to that little boy because it’s all he has to give, a name from a place he's never been and the deed to his dead Mama’s farm. 

I need a Tom Senior who tries so hard but doesn't understand his son. Ice has dreams of flying and something beyond sorghum fields and Tom Senior loves his son with all his heart but doesn't really know him. He didn't know his own Daddy beyond the buckle of a belt. He raised his son with all the goodness he could muster. 

He doesn't want his little boy to go to a place that he can't protect him and the only thing he knows about the military is the boys who didn't come home from ‘Nam. 

He can't vocalize his fears though, so he tells his boy not to come back without a chest full of metals and golden wings. 

Then he cries in his barn with no company but the stars. 

Ice comes home with a loudmouthed boy who is small and wiry and reminds Tom Senior of himself — running away to the Rodeo to fight bulls that were less scary than his own drunk of a daddy. 

He loves his boy, who is the sun that rises and sets, the thing that Tom Senior’s world revolves around. But there is no poetry in their life and he's just a man, but he opens the door wide enough to usher both men inside. 

“Y’all can bunk down in Junior’s room. It’s mighty fine to me.” 

It’s love, in the only way Tom Senior can express it. 

Just — Texan Ice is giving me feelings. 

[domina-honoribila]

Keep me in your prayers, looks like I'm going into labor

[quitealotofsodapop]

more Soft Boiled!

[the little red ribbon in her hair!!! And she has her own version of Macaque's scarf!!]

the red ribbon was meant to be phoenix feathers like Wukong's cap, and I like ti think her scarf may actually be a piece of Macaque's original scarf. the one he wears pre-death is different from his scarf post-resurrection, so maybe after he died Wukong wanted to keep a momento for himself/his unborn daughter. Macaque comes back to life and assumed the scarf, which was a gift from Wukong in the first place, had been rescinded as a show of them no longer being together. that is, until he recognizes the fabric hanging from the shoulders of a familiar black-furred child that just broke his nose mid shadow play.

[Wukong about to get a talking to the second his adoptive family gets a hold of him. Once the monkey recovers from the early labour, and has emotionally recovered from the rollercoaster that was Yuebei's birth ofc.]

I can imagine PIF helping as a sort of midwife through the whole thing, and being very supportive and giving a lot of great advice, having gone through a similarly rough pregnancy not overly long ago herself (I also like to think Red Son, due to the fire causing the pregnancy and birth complication, was also a premmie). aaanndd then the moment Wukong is ok again after Yuebei is confirmed ok she's turning into the most foul-mouthed, harshest, rage filled person in the room. the others don't bother scolding Wukong much, taking softer tones in despite their concern and annoyance, partly because she said it all first, and partly because they feel bad about how utterly devastating her rant was.

[It would be so cute if Yuebei first started crying over something completely normal - for some reason, I'm thinking it's something like Zhu Bajie trying to pull a funny face for her. Wukong is so relieved to hear his baby crying that he doesn't even scold his pilgrim brother for scaring her!]

she's awake, but barely, and still so, so quiet. then, admist the other pilgrims quiet fussing over her, Zhu Bajie tries to lighten the mood by making a face. she starts wailing. Wukong, who was just about ready to go out like a light, instantly is next to the crib, picking her up and both trying to comfort her and himself as he cries in joy and relief. the others have a similar joyous reaction, except for Bajie, who is very wounded by the thought of being ugly enough to make a baby cry.

[Wukong would be so protective of his little Moon Comet Star. She was so sickly and weak as a baby, that he worries about ever letting her leave places he knows to be safe.]

maybe another lasting affect of her brief encounter with the fire is sever asthma. not great for a premature newborn. I imagine it would be something that sticks with you if your baby is constantly wheezing, coughing, unable to really make sounds, struggling to eat, struggling to breath, and maybe even stops breathing entirely entirely at times. And with almost nothing you can do, as back when she was born their wouldn't really have been much treatment or medicine for things like asthma. the constant worry of Yuebei suddenly not being able to breath probably means she never really got to go places, especially without her Baba. heaven forbid is she also has any seasonal allergies. not to say Wukong was a total helicopter parent, but he definitely worried.

Wukong is aware enough to understand that this is not a normal, or ideal childhood, so now that she's a bit bigger and stronger he's really trying to not lose his mind with anxiety every time MK takes her somewhere new off island without him. he even tries to encourage her to go out, so even if he has worries and a few different concerns when MK mentions the noodle shop all got tickets plus an extra one for the his daughter to a shadow play he tries not to stifle anyone's fun.

[That and I can imagine Wukong took her to stay with Guanyin on her unaging island for a while to help her health improve.] + [I bet even with Guanyin, "Cousin" Nezha, and the very rare corespondance with PIF and Red Son, Yuebei spends a lot of her childhood lonely]

as mentioned above, with her having been so sick she def would have spent a lot of time at Guanyin's. she's a renowned healer, and Guanyin is someone he trusts dearly to boot, so going to the goddess is a win-win in his eyes.

and yeah. between not being allowed to go out to new places much due to being a sickly child, and Wukong's reputation and not having anyone to connect with other then busy celestials, there's not much chance to go exploring. the monkeys are fun, but they and her baba treat her very delicately even when playing. her baba is awesome in her eyes, and its one thing for your parent to be someone you can call a best friend, but its a little different when your parent is your only friend. its why, despite not liking him much, she jumps at MK's offer to take her off island and into the city without her baba sometimes.

I feel like she'd make fast friends with Bai He once the LBD fiasco is over.

[Yuebei is gonna have a time when she starts understanding whats really going on with the Noodle Gang, and why her family "suddenly" can't remember her. Wukong blames himself for not explaining it better to her earlier, but hadn't wanted to dump so much loss on his babygirl all at once - it was a lose-lose situation.]

Yuebei learning and coming to understand what's happened probably ends up being the b-plot of an episode. maybe "Amnesia Rules", instead of Wukong getting his memories back by getting hit over the head, it happens because he realizes through Yuebei having an emotional breakdown over the others, and now her own father, having forgetton her and he realizes that she's describing them having reincarnated and he's like "ah! that's what happened." and explains more indepth what that means to her. the others hear of her feeling about "them forgtting her" for the first time during this, and can't help but feel bad and try and help Wukong explain. she probably clings to her baba for a long time after, and stops being as cld to the others. maybe even kinda apologizes to MK for thinking he stole them from her.

maybe. not sure how well the idea works.

[Yuebei doesn't like Macaque, but she doesn't completely abhor the idea of him and her baba becoming close again. She just doesn't want either of them to get hurt again.]

she doesn't protest her presence much, as her baba seems... hopeful (though still a little sad sometimes) when he's around, and she also doesn't hate the idea of having her second baba around. but she also doesn't let him off scott free, glaring over Wukong's shoulder at him when macaque gets to close to soon, clinging to Wukong when he tries to talk to her, not talking much around him even if he addresses her directly, and generally not being very receptive. she probably at some point goes through a "rebelious phase" where she does things to test if he'll "really stick around even if she's troublesome". as far as she knows, he didn't even want her in the first place, or at least didn't care that Wukong was having her, so to her it seems like a reasonable thing to question.

[Azure Lion about to get decked in the face the second he comes around. When did the monkeys multiply? Why is he on fire?]

what can Yuebei say? she's fiercely protective and not happy about someone trying to take away her baba again.

[Wukong is just watching Yuebei tear into their enemies like; "I love my strong little girl." <3]

probably been said before, but no matter the universe; Wukong is a proud dad to all his kids at all times

Prev.

[Macaque comes back to life and assumed the scarf, which was a gift from Wukong in the first place, had been rescinded as a show of them no longer being together. that is, until he recognizes the fabric hanging from the shoulders of a familiar black-furred child that just broke his nose mid shadow play.]

I'm sorry but that is the cutest/saddest gotdamn thing ever. Wukong was so distraught at losing Macaque that he couldn't bare to leave behind his most cherished possession. So he took the scarf. Wrapped it around himself when he felt cold. Maybe even used it to swaddle his new baby girl. Yuebei dragging it around the cave as her security blanket. It being carefully washed and repaired so many times that it's barely red any more.

In the end, Wukong wanted Macaque to be there with him through all of This.

And once the reality sets in, Macaque is sobbing at the sight of Yuebei wearing her beloved scarf as he once did.

And I just love that my reoccurring theme with Macaque in the Egg aus is;

[aaanndd then the moment Wukong is ok again after Yuebei is confirmed ok she's turning into the most foul-mouthed, harshest, rage filled person in the room.]

PIF is terrifying when she's genuinely angry/worried - and once Wukong and Yuebei are safe/healthy post-natal, she starts yelling.

Wukong now finally understands what Macaque meant when he said his "ears are burning". Once the woman calms down, she wraps Wukong into a near-crushing hug, thanking and begging him to never ever do something so stupid again. Even if it saved her baby, Wukong nearly lost his. And PIF would never forgive herself if little Yuebei had been lost to the fire.

Yuebei gets a tearful kiss on the forehead from her auntie before PIF leaves the room, content with the words spoken.

Wukong makes sure to hug DBK when he sees him next, knowing that the Bull feels the same as his wife over the matter.

[the others have a similar joyous reaction, except for Bajie, who is very wounded by the thought of being ugly enough to make a baby cry.]

HAHA! XD Bajie would take it as an insult - but at least his little bro is happy to hear the baby make noise. A loud piglet is a healthy piglet. And little Yuebei was a real quiet piglet for a long time... at least she stops being afraid of ol' Uncle Bajie when she gets a little bigger.

I immediately thought of a scene from Hero is Back where Bajie is trying to calm down the baby Silly Girl by pulling a face, only for the baby to start screaming at him.

[maybe another lasting affect of her brief encounter with the fire is sever asthma. not great for a premature newborn.] + [heaven forbid is she also has any seasonal allergies. not to say Wukong was a total helicopter parent, but he definitely worried.] + [and yeah. between not being allowed to go out to new places much due to being a sickly child, and Wukong's reputation and not having anyone to connect with other then busy celestials, there's not much chance to go exploring.]

Oof. This hit me as an asthmatic preemie myself. Cus so much of my health was compromised as a little kid, I wasn't very active or adventurous - something thats easy to regret as an adult.

Wukong is so scared of how fragile his cub is. He's immortal, he's indestructable - but that means nothing to him if he can't protect his baby. He knows that mint and licorice, and anti-muscosal formulas help people with poor lungs, but the science back then wasn't 100% sure, and he sure as Diyu wasn't letting his daughter smoke datura cigarettes like the western doctors reccomended! At least the Eqyptians had Kyphi - an incense mixture (multiple formulas) that was frequently repurposed into asthma treatments.

All he can really do is to have a fully-stocked pharmacy inside Water-Curtain Cave, and make sure Yuebei stays away from pollen-rich flowers.

Wukong cries with relief in the early 20th century when Ventolin, Antihistamines, and Epinephrine become common knowledge.

Bonus: Interesting article I found on asthma treatment in Traditional Chinese medicine.

[as mentioned above, with her having been so sick she def would have spent a lot of time at Guanyin's. she's a renowned healer, and Guanyin is someone he trusts dearly to boot, so going to the goddess is a win-win in his eyes.]

Yuebei probably sees Guanyin as an aunt/grandparent figure. Hard not to when the bodhisattva is so doting over the tiny girl. Yuebei finds a lot of her lessons and treatments boring, but at least for a long time she had Red to hang out with.

Guanyin knows Wukong wouldn't trust Yuebei's care with them lightly. Even if Guanyin was present to bless Yuebei's arrival, the Monkey King is hesistant to let anyone tend to his little girl for a long time. The goddess is honoured to be so trusted.

[she jumps at MK's offer to take her off island and into the city without her baba sometimes.]

It's the thing that allows her to open up to MK a little more, even with her burning jealousy of how he's spending so much time with her baba + the Noodle Gang family + him getting to have a "normal" life pretending to be a healthy human cub.

She likes arcades but they get very loud for her at times. MK is quick to notice when the "Monkey Princess" (as he calls her) gets overstimulated, and suggests that they check out a quieter activity.

Like a play.

[I feel like she'd make fast friends with Bai He once the LBD fiasco is over.]

Little girl gang! And if Bai He is a foster kid/orphan like I hc, then Yuebei has zero issue letting another sickly little girl into her family. She's very sympathetic and understanding of Bai He's physical limits ever since she hosted LBD - the human girl now aching constantly from her body being forced to move like a puppet. The two jokingly compare how one briefly hosted Fire while the other Ice. Bai He could be considered the more feminine of the two, but they both bond over shared interest in animal science - Yuebei still loves her dinosaurs while Bai He is still a die-hard cat fan. And ofc the inherent chaos that two fearless little girls can get up to when they wander off from their babas' watchful gaze.

[the others hear of her feeling about "them forgtting her" for the first time during this, and can't help but feel bad and try and help Wukong explain. she probably clings to her baba for a long time after, and stops being as cld to the others. maybe even kinda apologizes to MK for thinking he stole them from her. maybe. not sure how well the idea works.]

Ultimately, even if Yuebei understood how death/reincarnation worked, she would still feel "forgotten" as (nearly) every soul that passes through Diyu is made to drink Meng Po's broth and forget their past lives. The little girl still feels abandoned in some way by her Pilgrim uncles "leaving" her and her baba. It's bad enough that Uncle Bull had to go away for a long time, but to lose her uncles, only to see them again in new forms that don't recognize her, devastates Yuebei in a way thats hard for her to articulate.

And for her own parent to be afflicted in a way that makes him unable to remember her? Oh you better believe Yuebei is a complete mess.

When Wukong briefly loses his memory in "Amnesia Rules"; he initially panics, wondering why he can't "feel the Egg" any more - only to look over at Yuebei and have a moment of fractured memory thinking that she must be a projection from the future, or an Egg Macaque made on his own without him.

This assumption continues unaddressed until the gang manages to get Tang back, and befriend Scorpion Queen. As they're about to get Wukong to go back into astral meditation to "reboot" himself, the ginger monkey turns to ask Yuebei something thats been plaguing him all day.

Amnesiac!Wukong: "Are you my Egg?" Yuebei, sadly: "I was..." Amnesiac!Wukong: "Aww. Come here, cub." (*Wukong pulls Yuebei in for a hug*) Amnesiac!Wukong: "If you really are my little Egg many years from now, I'm happy that she grows into a strong, fearless little lady. I'm proud to be your Baba." Yuebei: (*cries into Wukong's shoulder*) "I love you baba..." Amnesiac!Wukong, crying too: "I'm so happy to be able to hear that. I was so scared when you tried absorbing the Samadhi Fire... I thought I lost you. But you're a tough little girl aren't you? You spat that fire right out like it was sour!" Yuebei, aware of her birth circumstances: "Yeah. You tell me that story all the time." Pigsy and Tang, not aware: "What?"

Pigsy and Tang are so emotional over the amnesiac!father-daughter bonding, that they are completely off-guard when the older monkey rattles off some details about the Samadhi Fire that he neglected to let the others in on.

[she probably at some point goes through a "rebelious phase" where she does things to test if he'll "really stick around even if she's troublesome". as far as she knows, he didn't even want her in the first place, or at least didn't care that Wukong was having her, so to her it seems like a reasonable thing to question.]

Ooof!! I love the idea of Yuebei antagonising Macaque "just to be sure" that he's serious about staying around. Macaque honestly tries his best to be patient, but after a while he starts to get super annoyed with the girl's attitude.

Then one stray prank or comment rolls into a genuine verbal confrontation.

Macaque: "What is it about me that offends you so much!? I get it - my and your dad had a few fights and I sorta almost destroyed the world trying to escape the Bone Demon - but I'm trying my best here! I wouldn't have broken your dad out of his possession if I didn't think he was worth sticking around for!" Yuebei, emotional: "How am I supposed to believe that when you left us twice!?" Macaque, realizing: "Twice? What do you mean by- OH." Yuebei: (*trying not to cry*) Macaque: "You... you thought I knew? Kid, I only learned you even existed as a concept when Jin and Yin busted my lip open first thing after New Years." Yuebei: "You have your special ears! You should have known I was there when you-" (*stops talking, buries head into knees*) Macaque, extremely guilty: "I should have. I really should have. But I chose not to listen. I was just so... angry at that monk, at the circlet, even at your baba, I..." *sighs* "Maybe if I had stopped to listen, I would have known you were there. That Wukong had someone he would kill me for. I don't blame him for that." Yuebei, lifts head from knees: "You don't?" Macaque: "Nah. You're a lot cooler than I am. You took the Samadhi Fire head in before you were even born. And when you saw the Bone Demon, you didn't run and hide like I did - you and MK took that witch out. And did I see a certain little warrior take her first war trophy before we left?" Yuebei, avoiding eye contact: "She isn't using it..." Macaque: "To be fair it wasn't getting much use with her anyway. If she had a brain in that skull, she'd know Wukong picks a good troop. I just wished I had known that a few centuries ago..." Yuebei & Macaque share an awkward silence Macaque: "I wanna stick around kiddo. I missed out on a lot when I left. Both times really... But I want to stay. Flower Fruit Mountain is my home too, and I hope someday it could be a home me and your baba can share together again. Even if you don't believe me." Yuebei: (*affectionate elbow jab into Mac's rib*) Macaque, chuckling: "Well, that's progress from the nose busting." Yuebei: (*trying not to laugh*)

Bonus: Wukong hears some of this convo, or it's parroted to him by one of the (sneaked-out of Diyu with Mac) Eclipse twins. You know this monkey crying over his former mate and his baby girl finally starting to get along!

[what can Yuebei say? she's fiercely protective and not happy about someone trying to take away her baba again.]

The only reason Azure gets as far as he does with the Memory Scroll is that Yuebei is either A: Not on FFM at the time, or B: Got Memory Scroll'd in the confusion.

Otherwise, she starts kicking and punching Azure the second she clocks who he is. MK and Mei are gonna have to drag her off of him.

The Jade Emperor and Xiwangmu see this tiny monkey, burning with rightous anger and protectiveness, and just know who's cub she is. The Emperor does however, look over to his wife very briefly to ask if the little girl dragging Azure Lion by the scruff of the neck to Diyu is a lost grandchild of theirs.

[probably been said before, but no matter the universe; Wukong is a proud dad to all his kids at all times]

Wukong loves his kids so gotdang much. Canon or au - him a proud dad.

This got a little away from me - I hope you liked my reply!

[jokerislandgirl32]

Violet After Having Varina…

TW for mild mention of pregnancy and childbirth, eating disorders, and body image issues!

Violet’s been super self conscious about body her entire life. Leading to battles with eating disorders at her weakness points. When she starts dating Zach, he helps her to get over this, but it’s a long and drawn out process, and with each pregnancy she becomes very self conscious again.

It is particularly difficult with her after Varina because she had two pregnancies back to back, so…I imagine a scene like this happened between Zach and Violet 😢. Violet’s insecure, but Zach thinks she’s beautiful and doesn’t get it. And Varina’s just chilling with daddy, so confused as to why he’s confused 😆.

[snowe-zolynn-rogers]

A list of funny things I imagine feral Blood Moon doesn’t understand:

A spa day

A bath

Sex

A shower

Romantic relationships

The concept of a one night stand

How babies are made

Grocery shopping

Childbirth

Washing their hands

Periods

How to turn on a television

Paying for things

Money

Veganism

Vegetarianism

Allergies

Drinking water

Storms

Weather in general besides rain and clear

Shoes that aren’t slippers

Clothing shopping

[veloursdor]

based on this au where anakin died in childbirth and obi-wan is left alone to raise the twins, but he can't bear to be near the twins without breaking down because he misses anakin too much.

(1k words)

It was the first anniversary of Anakin's death and Obi-Wan couldn't force himself to get out of bed. The pain and heartache he still felt, even after 368 standard days apart from Anakin, made him unable to function properly on a normal day, let alone the anniversary of when he had lost the love of his life.

Faintly, he could hear the twins crying in their room, and Obi-Wan knew – at the back of his head – that he should’ve been caring for them, attending to their needs. 

Preparing their birthday party.

He even had a list of everything he needed to make it a very sweet party for the twins to look back on when they were older. Anakin had been so excited to be a parent, he had made so many plans for the twins, their milestones, their birthdays.

But Anakin was gone, and Obi-Wan was alone.

The twins continued crying as Obi-Wan contemplated the ceiling, the tears in his eyes at the misery he felt inside himself clouding his vision.

"Master Obi-Wan," 3P0's voice said from the hall, "Masters Luke and Leia need a diaper change and..."

R2's beeps interrupted whatever it was 3P0 wanted to say. Obi-Wan had never bothered to learn binary – unlike Anakin who had done his best to master the language before he mastered any other language the council expected of him, saying droids were as important as people –, so he hadn’t had the slightest idea what the astromech was saying to the protocol droid.

On a normal day, he would’ve cared.

But it wasn’t a normal day at all.

"Well, yes R2, but Master An..."

"*beep boop beep boop boop beep*"

"R2! Master Obi-Wan is trying his best!"

"Do it yourself, 3P0," Obi-Wan replied with a tired voice, unable to gather the strength to leave his bed. Anakin had been taken from him a year before. "You know how to."

He pushed the droids away from his door with a gentle push from the Force, covering himself up with the covers of his bed. He knew Anakin would want him to be there for the twins, celebrating their milestone of reaching one year of age.

But he couldn't muster the energy to face them.

The day passed him by in bed, and before he knew it, the moonlight was breaking through his window.

"Obi-Wan," Breha's voice said from above him, her tone harsh and judgemental as she took away from him the covers he was covering himself with. "This can't go on like this. I understand grieving your husband, but your children need you."

"Bail is still alive," he said, his voice as cold as his heart while he grabbed the blankets back. "You don't understand what it's like to miss the other half of you."

"Obi-Wan..."

"Luke and Leia are okay," he said, finally looking at Breha, who was staring at him with a frown on her face, her arms crossed above her chest. "C-3P0 and R2-D2..." make sure they have food and clothes "they help me with them."

Anakin had programed the droids with every child care program he could find - first aid, lullabies, nursery rhymes, Anakin had thought of anything and everything they could need - hoping to have his droids at the ready to help them out if he or Obi-Wan ever found some trouble or needed a little time for themselves.

"I appreciate you coming in to check on us," Obi-Wan said as he got out of bed, knowing his argument would fall in deaf ears if he was still in bed. "But you just caught us in a very bad day."

"Obi-Wan, your children..."

"Everything is fine, Breha," Obi-Wan said harshly, his tone curt. "My children have everything they need."

"Except their father! Obi-Wan you can't seriously believe..."

"Yes, Breha, they're missing their father because they...'' he said with force, the tears in his eyes finally falling, before cutting himself abruptly. No one should know what he truly thought of his children. "I'm trying my best here," he admitted, his face falling, "but it's not as easy as it seems."

"I know that, Obi-Wan," Breha said softly, her hand softly touching his arm. "Which is why Bail and I continue offering our house and time. We can look after Luke and Leia as long as you need, they'll be taken care of. Alderaan is a beautiful place where..."

But Obi-Wan stopped paying attention, as the idea of losing Luke and Leia - the last he had of Anakin - started ripping him apart from the inside. He couldn't lose his children, not even if they were the reason the love of his life was gone, forever ripped away from him.

"I appreciate the offer, Breha," Obi-Wan said with a forced smile as he started walking towards his door, softly guiding Breha who was still holding his arm, "but... Luke and Leia need to stay with the only parent they have left. Things will be better off tomorrow."

"Obi-Wan..."

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to make a smash cake for the twins as Anakin wanted," he said, congratulating himself at the way his voice only halfway broke at the mention of Anakin. "Have a good night, my friend," he said before closing the door behind Breha, exhaling once he was alone.

3P0 and R2 were busy with the children, who were wearing the onesies Anakin had bought for them a little over a year ago while they played on the floor of the apartment. Obi-Wan felt his heart tear itself apart in half at the sight of the onesies, knowing Anakin had chosen them with all the love he had for the twins.

“We’re gonna be parents Obi-Wan! Isn’t that the best thing you’ve ever heard?”

But as he was approaching them, Luke looked up, freezing Obi-Wan in place. Anakin's eyes were staring back at him from the face of their son, and Obi-Wan couldn't stand a minute more looking at them in such a foreign face.

He walked back to his room, closing the room behind him.

There would be other birthdays.

But there would never be another Anakin Skywalker.

[schmergo]

Directing community theatre plays is like what I imagine childbirth to be like. When things get down to the wire, I'm like out of my mind being like "Why did I agree to do this? This is brutal! I'm never doing this again! I don't think I can withstand this stress!" and then afterward it's like my memory immediately erases the stress and I'm like, "...Shall we have another?"

[sweetnxthngs]

[ may calamawy, non-binary, they/she] — whoa!  IMAAN EL-SALEM  just stole my cab! not cool, but maybe they needed it more. they have lived in the city for TEN YEARS, working as a/an OWNER OF BROWNSTONE BOOKS  that can’t be easy, especially at only 38 YEARS OLD. some people say they can be a little bit SHY and FANCIFUL , but i know them to be WARMHEARTED and ARTICULATE. whatever. i guess i’ll catch the next cab. hope they like the ride back to QUEENS! —character parallels: rory gilmore, monica gellar, lexie grey.

wanted connections • pinterest

BASICS

FULL NAME: Imaan El-Salem

NICKNAME(S): none, doesn't love nicknames.

AGE: 38

DATE OF BIRTH: February 14th, 1986

CURRENT LOCATION: Queens, New York City.

PLACE OF BIRTH: Bahrain

ETHNICITY: Egyptian, Palestinian.

GENDER: Non-binary

PRONOUNS: they/she

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: bisexual

RELIGION: Raised Muslim, does not follow organized religion perfectly by any means, but does believe in God and has faith.

LANGUAGES: arabic, english.

OCCUPATION:  owner of brownstone books.

FACECLAIM: May Calamawy

PHYSICAL TRAITS

HEIGHT: 5’7

WEIGHT: 115 lbs

HAIR COLOR: Brown

EYE COLOR: Brown

PIERCINGS: one lobe piercing in each ear, and an industrial piercing in the right ear.

TATTOOS:  here

SCARS|MARKS: freckles across her nose and cheeks,

SIGNATURE SCENT: Maison Margiela Replica Springtime in the Park.

PHOBIAS AND DISEASES

MENTAL ILLNESSES:  social anxiety.

PHYSICAL ILLNESSES:

PHOBIAS: 

RELATIONSHIPS

MOTHER:  Nashwa El-Salem ( Badawi) (deceased)

FATHER:  Omar El-Salem

CHILDREN: none

SIBLINGS: Laila El-Salem (younger half-sister)

RELATIONSHIPS:  coming soon

 PETS:  a black cat lovingly named sush, short for sushi.

PERSONALITY

ZODIAC SIGN:  Aquarius.

MORAL ALIGNMENT: Neutral Good.

FAVORITE FOODS: sushi, watermelon, mint and feta salad, garlic noodles with chili crunch, mutabal, french fries drenched in ketchup and mayo, shakshouka.

FAVORITE COLOR: lavender and pink

LIKES: the smell of the air just after it rains, and the color of the sky and it's orange-pink hue then, too, when svu or criminal minds marathons are on, the feeling of having a crush. romance books.

DISLIKES: anything above 70 degrees Fahrenheit, washing the dishes by hand,

HOBBIES:  as of recently, ballet classes just to get some movement in and they like the fluidness of it, reading fanfiction when they should be working, baking their feelings away, and self-defense classes.

BIOGRAPHY

tw death, tw religion, tw childbirth.

PAST.

BAHRAIN, February 1986.

It's February, but it's the Middle East in the 80s, so the weather is likened to the decade. Nashwa is in a hospital and still, sweating profusely. She's unsure if it's the weather or the pressures of childbirth. She is freshly married, and this is her first baby, when a screaming little girl comes out, Imaan, is placed into her arms she cries along with her. She barely gets to hold her though before the beeping of a machine rings in her ears and before she can even meet her daughter, to know her, Nashwa El-Salem is pronounced dead, complications in birth.

Omar, her father, has no idea what to do with a newborn daughter, and with his job, he doesn't really have the time to raise her alone, that's when originally, her jadda stepped in, helping raise the young child until she was of school age, and then, there was pressure for her father to remarry, to find someone to run the home while he worked. By the time young Imaan is seven, Omar is remarried, and expecting another child.

Their stepmother isn't from here, the States, actually, here as an expat, working for the embassy, and their little sister Laila looks more like her than their father. Imaan is barely eight but she knows that things have shifted.

They go back and forth from Bahrain to Washington often enough, two homes, and to Imaan, it feels like two families. Her father and herself, and then him and his wife and Laila. There is a passing comment about how she can't let go of a mother she never knew, and as Imaan gets older, they know that's true.

by the time Imaan is seventeen, laila is 10, and they are fully moved to Washington, leaving Bahrain, and everything Imaan has ever really known behind. They finish their last year of school in the States, and it is so different Imaan feels out of place, and alone. She tries to fit in, and tries to be the perfect daughter at the same time, but those two don't align. Raised strict Muslim, Imaan is used to a set of rules, and the western high school system is mostly not set up for them, especially in 2005. Her connection to her home and her faith gets lost somewhere along the way, more fights with her father about his expectations, about his wife and his other daughter, about how she will never be good enough. He calls her disrespectful and a disappointment, and she tells him she applied for college in Scotland far away from him, and the look on his face tells her she's gone too far, but the plans have already been set in motion.

The University of Edinburgh is a dream and an awakening. Imaan is still shy, an introvert one would say, but also more willing to explore who they are. Kissing a girl for the first time is like a rebirth, trying cigarettes, alcohol, and even drugs feel like things that make her stray from the staunch religious upbringing she had, and yet, the lack of restraints feels good.

By the time she graduates with a degree in English, she knows she is different, and she's not sure how much her family will like that.

She moves back home for a while and works in a library as an assistant, and the freedom college abroad brought her dwindles, it's back to dad's rules. her sister is just sixteen, and while they were never close, their relationship is not bad, but Imaan finds there isn't much they have in common. Her sister likes concerts, has a large circle of friends, and spends her time trying new makeup techniques, and that's all fine, except Imaan can't relate to it, as someone who finds their enjoyment in reading the newest romance boo release, or

She moves around a bit after two years at home, does two years in California, and two more in Chicago before moving with their roommate to New York. It's closer to home but totally different all the same, and it actually feels right. Unlike all the other cities. They get a job in a bookstore and share a two-bedroom with their roommate in Queens and life is okay, though not perfect.

PRESENT

Imaan brought Brownstone Books off the owner, who they worked for 8 years before she decided it was time to retire, and with a very small loan and the kindness of someone who took them in, they owned the place. It felt daunting, but the bookstore's popularity helped make the transition easier.

In those ten years since moving to New York, Imaan found that what was missing in her life was some sort of faith, and found a way to embrace spirituality and their sense of self, a sometimes uneven, but more comfortable balance. They got cat and name it sush, and they still live in a two-bedroom, though their roommate moved out recently to live with her boyfriend, so they're on the hunt. They love to bake, spending the time not in the bookstore either doing that or reading (books, or fanfiction, thank you). They don't see their family often, though her sister is 31 now, and has visited a few times.

wanted connections found here.

[sleepii-freddie]

vent

tw: mentions of sex, pregnancy and childbirth

I'm aroace, but I'm also rather young. Like a young teenager. And I'm constantly scared that I'm not actually aromantic and asexual and that those sorts of things will come later and I'll change my mind eventually, just like everyone says I will. Same with having kids, I am literally fucking terrified of the thought of pregnancy and childbirth, and everyone I tell that I won't have kids are always like, "ohhh, you can't know that now, you'll change your mind when you're older!", and it literally terrfies me. not like panic attack terrifies, but it gives me horrible sense of dread in my gut, because I don't WANT to have kids and i don't WANT to have sex or anything like that, but what if I change my mind eventually? i LOVE being aromantic and asexual, i love not obsessing over someone and wanting the kiss and make out with them, and don't even get me started with having sex. that literally sounds like a FUCKING NIGHTMARE to me.

because honestly? how allos describe attraction sounds fucking awful to me, I'm an agnostic but still I pray to whatever entity listening that I will never ever fall in love.

but what if me in five years sees the whole situation differently and actually WANTS KIDS?! I DON'T WANT KIDS and I'm fucking terrified I'll change my mind!! or that i'll somehow turn out NOT to be aroace and I HATE SOCIETY for telling me I'll change my mind and I DON'T FUCKING WANT TO because I LIKE IT HOW IT IS.

[torchflies]

Hi TG Fandom! 

I love Irish folklore and believe that the fae folk are terrifying. So…

Nicholas Bradshaw is born in Buck Holler, Tennessee to a coal miner and his wife. 

He's supposed to be an only child forever, he isn't though. 

His Mama loses six babies after him, buries ‘em under little rose bushes that grow big and sturdy with time, but no baby ever sticks as good as the bushes; sticks long enough to give him a little brother or sister to play with — until one does. 

Mama thinks it’ll be a boy, and her belly grows big — bigger than she was with all the others. 

One evening, Nicky is playing in a big circle of mushrooms that popped up over the day, jumping in and out of the ring — until Mama rushes over to scold him. She can't move very fast with her big belly, but she tries anyway, dropping her washing to kneel down and grasp him by the biceps. Mama looks at him with big worried green eyes and tells him to never ever dance in faerie rings, that the fair folk will come and steal him away. She speaks with the terror of a girl who spent her childhood in the Aran Islands, old Irish and fearful down to the very marrow of her bones. 

Nicky promises, his gentle brown eyes filling with tears, but then Mama starts bleeding and can't get to her feet. The baby is coming but something is very very wrong. 

Nicky doesn't dare leave her, he stays to hold her hand, the both of them crouched in the faerie ring — even as his Mama brings a small and silent baby into the world. It never makes a sound and Mama keeps on bleeding… Nicky doesn't know what to do. 

His Mama gasps, with pale lips and a grief-stricken twist to her soul, Please give him a little brother. Please. 

He doesn't know who she's begging, they're the only two out in the night — until he sees a bunch of little blue lights appear, bobbing in the darkness, surrounding them like little flickering candles. A pair of long white fingers comes from the shadows with them, gnarled like old crackling branches in the moonlight, reaching out to gather the remains of the tiny silent baby, the one who never lived, and to press another robust, naked baby into Nicky’s arms in the same breath. 

Tithe, something like a voice creaks out, older than the trees, and suddenly the living, breathing baby boy in Nicky’s arms — one with big, wet green eyes and wild black hair — starts to cry. 

Hello, little brother. He whispers, rocking his baby brother in the center of the faerie ring, surrounded by the sound of his mother’s dying breaths. 

Their father comes home from the mines at daybreak to two healthy sons and a wife who died in childbirth. 

[ficmesideways]

Request for Anonymous Gif Source: Han

Imagine having twin girls with Han and struggling with postpartum psychosis which causes him to worry.

------- Imagine -------

The change in you had happened only a few short days after the birth. You had become distant with both he babies, refused to eat, and even began zoning out for extended periods of time. Han had expressed his concerns and although you brushed him off, he had insisted. Taking both you and the children back to the hospital to discuss your symptoms with both the OBGYN and the psychologists on staff. He had held your hand and been with you through the entire process, worry lines creasing his loving eyes.

[jokerislandgirl32]

Guilt, Hope, and Gratitude

@foolsworldsblog asked this question in response to this post ⬇️

JIG Message: For this answer I’m placing it below a cut because it is filled with angst/depressing topics, discussions of pregnancy, stillbirth, loss of child, childbirth and delivery, and near death experiences. Nothing is explained in explicit or gory detail, but please do not proceed further if you are uncomfortable with such topics.

Zach’s Response

Well, this is a little hard to answer, technically we have two first borns. We have Alexandria, who is our first born but was stillborn. Then we have Varina who is our oldest earthbound child, and the first one born to survive birth/infancy. If that makes sense. Both times I felt an overwhelming sense of guilt when each child was delivered. 

With Alexandria we knew she wasn’t going to be born alive, I had to watch Violet endure a horrible and emotional labor and delivery only to have our child enter the world without ever taking her first breath or making one cry. Although the doctors informed us that it was nothing Violet or I had done wrong to cause the stillbirth, I still blamed myself for it.

I felt guilty because I couldn’t take Violet’s emotional and physical pain away. I felt guilty because our beautiful little girl never had a chance at life. I felt guilty because I hadn’t taken precautions, and I’d gotten Violet pregnant when her body was not ready for the pregnancy. Even after we took Violet to the doctor, monitored her health, and made sure she took the medication needed to ensure the safety of the pregnancy…we lost Alexandria. 

I held Alexandria after she was born, I named her, I talked to her…I didn’t want to let her go…But Violet was so distraught she couldn’t hold her or even look at her for the longest time. When the hospital staff came to take her, Violet finally gathered up the courage to hold her and look at her, and I’ve never heard Violet cry like that in my life, it absolutely destroyed me, and I’ll never get over that feeling of guilt and pain as long as I live. 

Varina’s birth elicited much of the same guilt ridden feelings. Violet went into premature labor and delivered Varina in the Tortuga with the help of the Wild Rats. Violet passed out due to complications shortly after Varina’s birth, and Varina was barely breathing. 

While I held Varina after she was born, it felt like it did with Alexandria all over again. I’d gotten Violet pregnant, I’d know the fragile state of her body, I’d known the hectic schedule I’d been putting us through with all of my villainous deeds wasn’t good for Violet while carrying this beautiful rainbow baby. But I’d done it anyway. And watching both of my girls struggle, fearing I’d lose another daughter and the love of my life filled me with nothing but absolute remorse and dread. 

But, holding Varina those few moments before we arrived at the hospital, seeing this tiny little bundle, the physical embodiment of mine and Violet’s love, gave me a sense of hope and extreme gratitude. I knew if Varina made it to this point and survived the birth, she’d make it in the end. 

I was so grateful that even though I’d made so many terrible decisions, Violet delivered this child alive, and Violet was still alive. I had hope that they make it, I prayed they’d make it, and in the end, they did.

So, for me fatherhood started out with feelings of sorrow and guilt, but it developed into feelings of immense joy, hope, and gratitude. It changed me for the better, and I am so thankful for the family Violet and I have created. 

POV: Guilty Me.

-Zach Varmitech-

[cxnsiglixrx]

Closed Starter

Relief. Sweet relief washed over the Empress. "It is alright..." Matilda leaned into her husband's touch, relishing it with all her energy. The baby in her arms began to fuss, Matilda shushed her. "The physician said she would have your hair..." A hand gently ghosted over the head of the child. Matilda stared down at the small baby in her arms, and thought back to her what her mother had told her.

You will lie in this bed soon enough, Matilda.

"Would you like to hold her?" The Empress sat up slightly, already extending the fussing baby towards her father. Her mother tragically passed away when it was time to have her child, Matilda was eight years old. Still, she remembered the screams and the agony coming from those large black doors. She had died to bring a son into the world, because that was the only thing her father would accept. When her waters first broke, Matilda prayed to the Gods that she not die this day.

"What about...Isabella?" // Cont from here // @justsurv1vor