#toxic frienship

[hayatheauthor]

"Why do you care so much about accidentally leaving people out?" Because I've had friend groups where they were the planets and I was their Pluto.

I've had friend groups where our dynamics revolved around a Sun, with everyone vying for their attention if only to bask in their light for a mere moment. Where our thinly strung bonds collapsed the second our Sun left.

I've had friend groups where they bonded as Saturn's rings, finding solace in their shared shortcomings while isolating those more talented than them.

But I've also had friend groups where we bond as Neptune and Uranus—so similar we could be known as twins. Friend groups like Venus and Earth: so awfully different, yet it was those differences that kept us together.

And I would rather create a social system like the latter than the former.

[morepeachyogurt]

i love you, i do, but i cannot fucking stomach you

1. richard siken | 2. david foster wallace | 3. slavoj žižek | 4. x? | 5. succession, jesse armstrong. gif by @lesbiankendall | 6. orla gartland | 7. trista mateer | 8. ilya repin | 9. iain thomas | 10. thoroughbreds, cory finley | 11. yrsa daley-ward |

text id below

1. sometimes you get so close to someone you end up on the other side of them

2. [in red highlight] everything i’ve ever let go of has claw marks on it.

3. [white text on a background of a field] A FRIEND HAS TO BE OUTSIDE MY REACH, BEYOND MY GRASP. AND THERE CAN BE NO FRIENDSHIP WITH SOMEONE WHOM I AM NOT READY TO BETRAY: A FRIEND IS SOMEONE I CAN BETRAY WITH LOVE.

4. Long before Caesar and Brutus were lessons, they were friends. // They played with stick swords in their kingdom of trees // and dressed up in crowns of flowers // and painted mud on each other's faces. // The pair was often found walking down dirt roads, // Caesar stomping proud and tall, // and Brutus- step by step- placing his feet into the footprints left behind. // Caesar grew into a strong Roman man. // Brutus grew into Caesar's shoes. // They walked to a wishing well and they threw in their weapons // and Caesar whispered a prophecy: // "We live and die together." // The day before the slaughter, Brutus took pause. // He turned to Caesar and thought // "I'll love you twice as hard today to make up // for tomorrow," // and they stayed up and played cards on the kitchen floor. // It wasn't until the next morning that Brutus realized how cold the tile was. // Life and death are not mutually exclusive. // When Caesar died, so did Brutus, in the sense that he never really lived again. // In the present, when someone mentions one of them, // they seldom exclude mention of the other.

5. a scene from succession. the characters kendall and stewy are in a dimly lit alley, one walks away from the other while saying “you’re my third oldest friend. you fucked me like a tied goat. we’re great.”

6. I'm not happy if you're not happy // And swear that you're always sad // You're pathetic, I resent it // When you're down, it hurts so bad

7. I've gotten so good about not flinching at the sound of your name that people don't know I'd still throw myself mouth-open into the ocean for the chance to drown somewhere you might see it.

8. the painting ‘Ivan the Terrible and His Son Ivana’. it depicts a man holding another man who is bleeding profusely from his head.

9. there are a million ways to bleed, but you are by far my favorite.

10. scene from the movie thoroughbreds. a character lays crying wrapped around her friend, she is covered in blood, her friend is unconscious.

11. [in pink highlight] and be wary of friends, yeah? they are the ones who kill you, in the end.

[dawnthefox24]

Okay so I saw a gameplay of Rot in Paradise and I must say I have an understanding on what happen towards the ending of the game...It honestly hits pretty hard if you see it from a different angle from.

SO WARNING SINCE THIS CONTAINS MAJOR SPOILERS OF THE GAME TO PLEASE BE ADVISE TO PLAY THE GAME FIRST/WATCH THE GAMEPLAY OF ROT IN PARADISE BEFORE READING THIS POST AND WHAT THE MESSAGE OF THE ENDINGS ARE SUPPOSE TO BE. ALSO IF YOU DECIDE TO READ THIS WITHOUT WATCHING THE GAMEPLAY/PLAY THE GAME...Well that's your choice can't force you to do what you want. So again spoilers for RIP

Anyways here are my analysis and how the ending is a metaphor about letting go toxic people in your life....

So gonna cut to the chase of the ending, mainly with June talking about her cousin being involved with toxic friends, and how she was there for her.

Now June stated that she wished her cousin left sooner, which is valid but also it's hard to leave the people you know for such a long time.

Now I have been in a toxic friend group before and like June. Which made me feel for her and I've grown to like a few of the characters. (Mainly all of her friends)

June loves and care for her friends deeply which you can tell in the game, but over time they start to change and slowly become aggressive and lash out at her to the point one of them physical harmed her.

Her friends start to dismiss her and her feelings, but she wants to help them. She cares for them and wants to know how to help them but in the end they don't want her help. With the scene of everyone heading towards the ocean drowning shows you can drown yourself with theses people or you can let them go as they drown themselves.

June wanted to save them badly, I do believe Ryan was her friend but it was stated by June that Ryan was a "pushover" and easily "Peer Pressured" now I don't think that was the case if Ryan "drowning" in fact it was the way that June wanted to stay with her friends wanting them to help them, so when she talked with Ryan saying what if they were the weird ones. Which made him rethink his choices and go with the friend group towards the end, he still cared about June and honestly he was a good friend but her words made him rethink his choice which isn't June's fault, in fact I believe she wanted and Ryan wanted to be wrong. They've known Carmen,McCoy, and Vonnie to be their closest friends. (Though that's a theory of mine of why Ryan "drowned")

In both ending if pick to fallow them, your drowning with a toxic friend group which is hard because you love and care about them which is why June doesn't resurface . I've been their before I was friends with a few people and I thought I knew them only for them to lash out at me because I wanted to help.

The whole point of RIP isn't a monster or some Lovecraftian horror, it more about how hard it is to leave/stay with a toxic friend group.

Like I said I was like June, but it's up to the players that decide June's faith.

If you choose to let go of them, which is the good ending, she's mourning her friends, it's hard to lose friends. I cried losing my friends because I love and care about them. Like how June loved and cared for them as well.

It's hard seeing your friends true self and like Ryan said to June. "If what they're doing would cause them to hurt you, then that's not normal."

When Ryan said that that shit hit pretty close to home, because he knows them and they wouldn't hurt either him or June but of course the "vacation" shattered the mask of facade.

Again RIP is a good game it isn't like dead plate, married in red, and so on. But it hits close to home about how hard it is letting go of the people you see as a second family.

But yeah that's my two cents. Again this game hits pretty close to home if people understand what June is going through, I want to help my friends only for them to push away, making me think I was in the word and how they made me believe I was wrong that I was changing, how they didn't understand me or I didn't understand their feelings...Again nonetheless the game is amazing and really heartfelt.

I love June, she is like me and wants to help people but sometimes the people you know and care for sometimes don't want to be helped. It hurts knowing you can't help them and it hard to let go of the people you love but its better then drowning with them, you can mourn them but it's up to them to change for the better or the worst.

[adventuringblind]

Toxic Reappearance

Charles Leclerc x Reader

Genre: Hurt/Comfort

Request: no this is pure self indulgence. However, they are open for Max, Charles, Lando, Oscar, Daniel, and I’ve now added George to the list.

Summary: an old friend reappears into your life, one that left you traumatized. Having thought you’d never see them again you didn’t ever say anything. When Charles figures out what’s been going on he may just be to late to save you from your past.

Warnings: toxic friendships, abusive behavior,

Notes: written in second person. I feel like abusive friendships aren’t talked about enough. It still hurts and still leaves you with trauma. I’m basing the reader’s feeling off my own from when I went through it. George is actually my stand-in for someone else involved.

Masterlist

Charles always tried his to appear calm and collected. However, when you started acting different then what he’d used to, calm and reasonable went out the window.

You’d always struggled with friends. Mainly because the one you had was incredibly possessive. She managed to cut you off from a good chunk of the people you once were close with. Using guilt and lies to confuse everyone involved.

You knew her home life wasn’t the greatest and mentally she wasn’t in a good spot, so you tried to be her rock.

It started out great in grade school. The two of you were fast friends and could hardly ever be seen without the other in two. Then it started to become a toxic loop. One you couldn’t get out of due to the guilt every time you tried to set boundaries.

You were so young. You wanted to help. Not that her home life is an excuse for what she did, but it puts it into perspective. Helps you understand why she did what she did.

Playful punches when she was annoyed with you. Blaming not knowing her own strength on why it was so hard. Never being allowed to have your own interests. Always overshadowed by what she was feeling.

You shrunk into yourself. Not able to talk to anyone because you believed her. You thought she left bruises on accident, your boyfriends kissed her first, she really just wanted those revealing pictures of you to bless you with compliments only to turn around and compare your bodies.

In your sophomore year of high school she had to move. Her mom had received a job farther away. You were able to cut contact after that. The weight slowly lifting off your shoulders. The bruises that once littered your skin now clearing without fear of them coming back later.

You’d talked about it, understood that what happened was not okay in the slightest. Your family was floored when you opened up about it to them a couple years later. Then you decided it was in the past, determined ti put everything behind you and move on.

Unfortunately the past has a way of catching up with you.

It was around this time that Charles sped into your life. Quite literally.

You’d been walking through the town. Busy with people in town for the grand-prix weekend. You’d wanted to go but it was more expensive then you could afford. Settling for enjoying it from afar.

You were not at fault for what happened next, having looked both ways before crossing the street. Only to be met with a nice looking car whipping around the corner. It was so fast your only reaction was to protect your head and brace for impact. Surprise flooding your system when nothing happened.

You slowly looked up. Thanking your guardian angel for saving you from what could have been disastrous.

The man in the driver seat frantically got out of the car. Rushing over to you to make sure you were okay. His frantic apoligizing almost went unheard as you began laughing.

You blamed the adrenaline. "I can't believe I almost got hit by a really nice care and now a good looking man is trying to make sure I'm ok."

The man had no words to respond with. Finding himself oddly flattered. The woman he could've killed is completing him? It feels like a corny romance movie.

He offered you a ride to your destination, which you accepted. Joking about how he could be a serial killer.

He assured you he wasn't. Explaining how he was racing this weekend. Killing someone was definitely not on the agenda.

You two exchanged numbers that day. Getting to meet up with him a few times before he left. Then having to resign to text and video call.

You two became good friends. The first truly good friendship you'd had in a while. You were grateful for Charles and his never-ending patience. And he was grateful you were there to listen in good times and in bad.

You were ecstatic when he invited you to a race Monaco. He got to show you around his world and his home. Your eyes lighting up at every little piece of himself he shared with you.

It was then that he asked you out on an official date. Letting the feelings that he'd developed for you spill out.

Obviously you'd reciprocated.

Now, you two have been in a relationship for two years. Learning and growing with each other. First over long distance before Charles had enough and asked you to travel with him.

You were thankful that remote studies had become increasingly popular since quarantine. Giving you the opportunity to follow Charles all around the world.

It was exciting for both of you. Sharing experiences together brought you closer together.

You'd also become friends with others around the paddock. You got along with most everyone. George has become a good friend through your travels.

So it only made sense when he was excited to introduce you to his girlfriend.

You and Charles were walking to the Ferrari garage when he came running up to you.

"Charles! Y/N! I want you to meet someone!" He shouts to you. Joy clearly evident in his voice.

Charles immediately noticed your entire demeanor change when you turned around. The woman he didn't know embracing you in a tight hug. You looked like you wanted to throw up but tried to put a smile on for George.

"You two already know eachother?" Charles asked quizzically.

"We were best friends growing up! I'm surprised she hasn't talked about me." She was referring to you and you knew you should respond but the shock of seeing her wouldn't let you.

She looked different, but you'd still recognize her anywhere. She'd started modeling after high-school. Turns out she met George at a show and they hit it off.

The whole time they talked, you were silent. Trying to choke down the need to tell George to leave her before he gets stuck. But maybe she'd changed and has been able to heal some.

When you and Charles continued walking, he immediately was trying to figure you out. Asking questions you couldn't hear. Your breathing labored.

He got you into his driver's room as fast as possible. "You don't have to tell me everything right now, mon amour. But I do need to know if this is a security issue and if you're okay."

You shake your head and play with his fingers. "I don't think so. She just wasn't the greatest friend." You confessed, hoping it would be enough for now.

Charles pulls you into him. He's unsure what to do, having never been in this situation. Seeing you respond to someone like this makes him more nervous than he wants to admit.

Through the next few months, you opened up little by little. Though with the girl constantly with you, it was starting to send you backwards.

It felt like your body just reacted to her. Your conversations with anyone were distant. You started flinching away from sudden hand gestures.

Charles tried his best to keep you separated from her. It never worked, though. She always found you, and you are too nice to tell her to go away.

It's was even more concerning when he noticed George exhibiting similar behaviors.

The group had gone out to the bar to celebrate the end of the race weekend. George seemed closed off to everyone. Responding almost exclusively to his girlfriend. Her hand on his bicep made him flinch away.

You also were very quiet. She was sitting in between you and George, giving the benefit of control.

Charles was ready to kick her out. You'd finished telling a story only to immediately be shut down and made to feel inferior.

When the two of you arrived back at the hotel, you broke. Falling into Charles and letting the tears flow freely.

"I can't do it anymore." You wailed. Taking comfort in Charles embrace and his hand smoothing your hair.

"We'll figure this out mon amour. I won't let her hurt you."

Things only got worse from there.

She'd managed to get into your phone while you weren't paying attention. You curse yourself for using the same pincode since high school.

When you went to check it, you noticed things were missing and out of place.

You stared at her, pondering if you should say something. And letting the anger win, you did so.

"Did you go through my phone?" You kept your voice as if you were just curious. Hopefully, to deter her from getting angry.

It didn't happen that way. She was furious you'd evernask such a thing. Ranting about how she's been so loyal to you even after you started ignoring her when she moved.

She'd gripped your shoulder far too aggressively. Telling you she only wants to see you happy.

The missing contacts on your phone were frustrating. Even Charles' number was missing. All your pictures with friends had been deleted. Including those on your socials.

You curled farther into yourself after that.

Charles struggled to help you open up. Having to treat you like glass that might shatter.

You'd started wearing sleeves regularly. Barley letting him touch you in the simplest of ways. Changing in the bathroom when you once didn't care because he'd seen it all.

It hurt him seeing you like this, and he became determined to fix it once and for all.

On the other side, George had been exhibiting similar behaviors. It felt that nobody could get in contact with him. His girlfriend practically held his phone hostage.

The shirtless pics had suddenly stopped, and he'd started wearing sleeves daily. It made everyone concerned for his well-being.

His teammate needed answers. So Lewis made his way to find them.

Two men on a mission, practically the same one, run into each other.

"Lewis! How are things?" Charles tried to put a smile on his face.

"Could be better at the moment, I'm actually really concerned about George." Lewis' honesty never failed to throw Charles off.

"I'm worried about him as well. Y/N has also been worrying lately."

"Maybe we should talk somewhere more private."

The two ended up back in Charles' driver room. Knowing that the female in question would most likely be around the Mercedes garage.

"Maybe we should talk to George and explain our concerns?" Suggested Lewis. His boy sprawled out across the floor.

Charles shakes his head in response. "I've done that already with my girlfriend." He sighs in pained defeat. "She doesn't want to be around her, but for some reason, it always ends up happening. She barely lets me hug her now."

"I think George is too nice to tell her to get lost." Confesses the Brit. "I don't know what we can do then. Unless it becomes a security thing." He shrugs.

"Have we ever actually caught her being aggresive?"

It dawned on them both that they'd never caught her in the act.

And so the two males formed a plan.

It took three mire race weekends to catch her. She had you gripped by the shoulders and backed into the wall. Oddly enough it was George who had arrived on scene first. His race suit tied around his waist.

He’d made an attempt to reason with the irrationality angry woman in front of him. The situation only becoming more escalated.

It wasn’t long that the staff and drivers around the area were alerted by the commotion. Charles and Lewis caught each others eyes before the two were jogging to the center of the scene.

Charles stepped defensively in front of you. Lewis managing to putt George farther away. Now that three drivers are involved, it didn’t take long for security to step in.

“I think we need to talk about what happened.” Sighs Charles. Grateful that she’s gone but feeling that this won’t be the end of situation.

You find yourselves back in yours and Charles hotel room. Accompanied by Max and Lando who though you were going to the bar as usual. Charles explained why that would probably not be happening tonight, the two deciding they would help the mood by bringing alcohol with them to the room for a mini party of sorts.

George was constantly looking over his shoulder and you checked the room multiple times over to be sure everything is locked.

You immediately sank into Charles the moment you felt safe. George is pacing back and fourth mumbling to himself, attempting to get words out that seemed to be difficult to say.

“Do you think we can help with the anxiety?” Asks Lewis. He found his home on the couch. George pauses for a moment fumbling around with his words.

Lando and Max are completely clueless and find themselves seated at the table. Trying to be supportive but not knowing how.

“She’s crazy.” George finally manages. You shake your head in agreement, to exhausted for words. “I’ve tried breaking up with her multiple times but she keeps coming back.” He slumps against the wall. His body curling in on itself. “She knows where I live, she’s messaged me with multiple phone numbers, she somehow manages to get a key to my hotel rooms, she’s even broken into my car.” He’s crying now, all the boys shooting him and you looks of sympathy.

“She was the same way when we were younger. It seems to have escalated more now.” You drawl, eyes closed from feeling safe in Charles arms. He pulls you closer, his fingers playing with your hair. It was the first time he’d had you those close in months. Determined to embrace every second of the contact.

“No wonder you two look paranoid.” Lando places his head in his hands. Max shot him a look, saying that was probably a poor choice of words.

This time around, though, you knew things were going to be different. You had people around that could help.

After everyone left for the night, George having gone with Lando so he didn't have to stay in his room, Charles didn't let you go.

Things were going to get better for you. Finally getting the help you needed all these years. Almost an element of closure.

When you put on comfy clothes in front of him, he wasn't sure what to do. His eyes couldn't leave your body. It looked like you had been at war.

The tears slide down your cheeks as Charles places gentle kisses on each painful mark.

"My kisses are magic, I assure you."

You smile at him through the tears. Overwhelmed by all the emotions you'd gone through in one day.

"Good thing I have you around to make it better then."

[sad-tired-andlonely]

Why do I care so much for people who wouldn’t even cared if I died? I’m over here grieving and they’re living their best life acting like I don’t even exist.

[biblicallycorrectangelvenom]

I wish the best for your mental health

But I wish nothing but the worst for you as a person

[haosoah]

[mothusingtheinternet]

Alastor and Mimzy

The thing about what Alastor said to Mimzy is something I’ve been wanting to talk about for a while. They don’t see each other for seven years, but when Alastor notices her, he is DELIGHTED. His threatening grin instantly turns into a genuine smile. He’s properly happy. He even lets her hug him, despite canonically hating physical contact. Then when she’s out of earshot, Husk brings up how Mimzy clearly wants something from him and Alastor looks stretched, but still doesn’t fully get mad at Husk. That’s because he knows it’s true, but he wants Mimzy’s intentions to be good. He wants her to be a good friend to him. Then Mimzy admits that she’s only there because she wants Alastor to kill some sketchy people she’s in trouble with. And Alastor does. But when he has, she just isn’t leaving, suddenly it wasn’t about the loan sharks. Suddenly Alastor is her best friend again, and it’s all about them as a couple of besties. But Alastor gets it this time. He realises she just used him for his power. He tells her to leave, once again looking pained by this decision. Mimzy then refuses, playing it off as a joke. Finally, he tells her that she deliberately brought harm to the hotel and clearly has no plan to use it for its intended purpose. Upon hearing this, Mimzy is furious asking him: “fine. What are you good for then?” It is clear that Mimzy is manipulating him and I cannot tell you how much Alastor telling her to leave meant to me.

[artofkhaos404]

A tip for those still in highschool:

Don't spend the highlights of your highschool experience with people that will dampen those memories. Please select the people in your life carefully, more so than I did, so that you can look back on those memories and smile. Differentiate who stuck with you through the hard times, who values your honesty, who tells you what you need to hear rather than what you want to hear, who brings you closer to Christ, who is loyal to you no matter what, who never talks shit about you, who believes in self improvement, who sees how much you care and appreciates you for it, who has their priorities straight, who reminds you what you're worth even when you forget... and who is all talk.

Coming from someone who is deathly afraid of being alone, it is always better to be on your own than to be surrounded by liars and manipulators and fake "I love you"s.

Because you are who you hang out with. Everything you hate about them is what you will become. And even after you come to your senses, discover your worth and emerge from the waves of half truths you were trapped under, because of the time already spent with them, their stench will remain.

And it will drive you mad.

Pray for discernment, my friends. There are few wounds in life as painful as betrayal.

[moonshadow-thoughts]

I know loneliness can be a bit hard sometimes, but trust me it is so much better to be alone than to have toxic people in your life who never accept the real you, who use you just to achieve their own goal, who make fun of you, who try to manipulate you, who hurt you or who constantly make you feel bad. Because those people don't care about you in the first place. They don't care if they hurt or harm you, they only care about their own goals. And if hurting or harming you will get them there they won't hesitate to do it.

Yes, being alone can be a bit tough sometimes, but it is also so much better than spending your life with those kind of people. It's so much more peaceful.

[thatgayash]

WHY DIDNT YOU SAY NO WHY DIDNT YOU SAY NO WHY DIDNT YOU SAY NO WHY DIDNT YOU SAY NO??

WHY DID I EVEN FUCKING BEFRIEND THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE??

I JUST FELT PITY FOR THEM

I NEVER SHOULD’VE

I WANNA FUCKING SNAP THEIR NECK

AND TEACH THEM HOW IT FEELS BEING AROUND THEM

NOBODY GIVES A FUCK IF YOU USE A DIFFERENT NAME BRO

WE’RE AT A GOD DAMN RED NECK SCHOOL THEY AINT GONNA CALL YOU ACE

ALL YOU DO IS EMBARRASS ME

[midiosaamor]

bro this is like the third or fourth time she sent me a friend request. i literally changed my user AND ignored her request but she STILL found me ;-;

literally why is she so obsessed with me???💀💀

[cuddlebunn]

The fact you think you've moved on from the fact that they hurt you until you see them again being happy and making new friends like they didn't crush your heart and soul

#iwannahurtthemback

[junoisthecoolest]

sometimes i like to think

that i am the number one

that i am the only one

that i am the favorite one

but i simply am not

they have cried together

laughed together

sang together

and they hate each other

but simply

i will never be better

and never will i be

the number one

the only one

or the favorite one

i will just be

someone

[thisistheheartspeaking]

The world has become so twisted that a constant act of kindness given freely and unconventionally gets taken for granted while those offered with a price gets treasured. I have learnt not to be generous in giving my time, my shoulder, my ears and certainly not a single space in my heart. It's in our nature to appreciate things with high prices. I guess that's how people view kindness today. A mere 'thing' that holds no value.

[moonastrogirl]

Let's collectively leave astrology out of toxic patterns

Credit @moonastrogirl

Can we all please collectively leave astrology out of toxic patterns ? No, it’s not because that man you dated was a scorpio or a gemini venus that all scorpio or gemini venus are bad or have issues. It’s not either because your mom has her sun in her 5th house that she is narcissistic. No it’s not because you’re an Aries that you have anger issues. And if you do seek help, do some therapy, reflect ! Let’s leave toxic patterns and behaviours to what they are toxic patterns and not personality traits based on zodiac placements…

*synastry can be more accurate to understand the dynamic of a toxic relationship rather than just personal placements so someone could have been horrible to you because of how their chart has interacted with yours ! And be the perfect person for someone else and that is fine. Sometimes the energy doesn’t match. Sometimes it does. And sometimes that person is just toxic alone and need to seek therapy not because they have a certain placement or sign.*

Why am I saying this ?

(Update of my post thanks to the comment section I always appreciate your feedbacks thank you 🙏)

1) Because it can create stereotypes for some placements or zodiac signs and make people not take astrology seriously…

2) Based on the birth chart the energy of a placement can change drastically especially after looking at the aspects and the dominant planets.

3) Some people use astrology to justify their toxic traits or behaviours and it’s not okay at all. Placements create an energy and a dynamic and we all have the will power to overcome the obstacles of difficult placements and do better.

Credit @moonastrogirl