#toxic family members
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you may need to hear this: cut them off.
people know what they’re doing. there is an intrinsic human knowledge of how relationships & friendships are meant to work. you don’t need to teach them how to treat you like a person. yes, there is a learning curve to every relationship where you learn how to mesh with each other, but you should not have to advocate for being treated with basic human decency.
nobody brings enough to the table for you to willingly put up with mistreatment. if you are safe to leave, then this is optional, and you have a one-up over them in this situation. don’t threaten to leave, just go. even that is a waste of your time. they should already know how to treat other people like they’re human. there is no excuse.
#relationships#friendships#relationship#friendship#ex best friend#ex#toxic relationship#toxic relationships#toxic#toxicity#toxic love#toxic friends#toxic friendships#toxic friendship#toxic family#toxic family members#toxic people#toxic parents#toxic person#don’t mind me just tag 🐴ing#don’t miss your queue
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So I know most people won't read this or care really but I have to talk about it somewhere and most people I know irl don't understand or will just try to brush off the issues. I found out right after my birthday back in October that I'm pregnant, 3-4 weeks later I found out I'm having twins (scary(message me if you want to hear the genders or see the ultrasounds and stuff I'm not posting that here.)). Everything has been going fine and well up until about 2 weeks ago when I found out that one of the babies potentially has a heart defect, so excess stress and anxiety is not a good thing for me or the babies. (I've also started going to therapy for my anxiety but sometimes it's hard to express everything in such a short amount of time.)
But the reason I'm making this post is to rant about my families reactions to hearing the news cause I waited as long as I could to tell anyone on my side or the family because I knew they'd try to make it about them. My cousins first reaction was what I expected " oh well you know I've been wanting another baby and been having issues conceiving you can give one of them to me." (Trying to play it off as a joke.) My Aunt literally goes "why haven't you been talking to me?" Then in the next message I get from her before I can respond is "I can hardly walk my knee hurts so bad." Then she went and told all my other aunts who luckily have been chill about it for the most part. But the aunt who told everyone lives with her mother in law who has custody of her daughters sons. Because I've been taking my cousins daughter one day a week, this mother in law of my aunts is asking if I will take her grandsons who refuse to behave for anyone and I've told everyone I don't need that stress and why and everything but nobody is fucking listening to me about it. And it's pissing me off so fucking much.
Where do people get off on making a pregnant person stress so much they could lose their baby? Why does everyone have to know everything about everyone else? Do they really think their responses and shit don't have consequences? These are just some of the things I question about this but again, I don't figure anyone is reading this, I'm just ranting cause I needed to get it off my chest.
#pregnant#pregnancy#pregnancy stress#toxic family members#how do i handle all this shit?#little life update i guess?
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#toxic family siblings#toxic family sibling#emotional abuse#toxicpeople#toxicfamilymembers#toxicfamily#toxic family members#toxic family#toxic siblings
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Being in your twenties and your worst enemy is your uncle and his wife who are in their forties and patronize you and make low of every decision you make and wish you evil basically
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I’m trying to cut off my cousin who lives far from me and visits without warning. Now that the holidays are over, she is probably coming soon.
I feel like I’m in a horror movie waiting for that bitch to knock on the door and attack me.
#toxic family members#vent post#disclaimer here she doesn’t physically abuse me#it’s verbal abuse we’re dealing here
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instagram
#ladyspeech sankofa#boundaries#toxic family members#holiday season#healing#recovery#personal space#generational trauma#dysfunctional families#peace
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Being an adult means you need to keep your head up, and you need to act civil amongst your peers. In the workplace, you need to know how to mold yourself to the people around you so that you'll be someone tolerable enough to work with.
But that's how we get swept under the rug. That's how we become forgotten.
No risks taken means you stay tolerable, and quiet..but it's comfortable, and good enough for now.
At the same time, we lose a little bit of ourselves by not taking risks, we lose a bit of our sanity, because we don't express ourselves the way we want.
Of course being who I want to be means losing relationships with others in the process. Those who accept me, stay, and those who don't, instead, stay away.
I took the risk. I stayed true to myself, but I lost a family member along the way. We no longer talk, we don't understand each other and reconciliation is a challenge. I tried to do something for myself for a change, and stopped being her personal doormat, but the moment I did that, became the moment I'm blamed for all the mistakes she's committed thus far. Those mistakes go away when I go back to being her doormat.
How did this workplace post turn into a mini blurb about family relationships? Well I suppose sometimes interacting with family becomes somewhat of a workplace environment.
It sucks...
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Though it's best to escape from toxic people, sometimes it's not possible for whatever reason. When this happens, it's best to set and keep boundaries to protect yourself.
#spoonie#disability#chronic disability#disabilities#spoonie life#ableism#aunt lori#aunt advice#advice#toxic relationship#relationships#relationship#relationship advice#toxic#toxic family#toxic family members#mental health#boundary setting#boundaries#boundaries with family#family#family matters#emotional well being#self respect#raised by narcissists#emotionally immature parents#adult children of emotionally immature parents#emotional manipulation#emotional maturity#emotional intelligence
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I don’t think fans get how much Dick means to Bruce. I say he is Bruce’s favorite not because he doesn’t love the others, it’s because what Dick and his version of Robin symbolizes in the comics themselves.
He is the dawn after a long dark night. That’s why his outfit has always been bright?
Dick is literally Bruce’s foil. He is everything Bruce wanted for himself but freely gives to the only source of light in his life.
Alfred is important sure but you know who is always picking Bruce off the ground when he fails? Dick Grayson. And Bruce may fumble but by god he is always the first there when something happens to Dick (I didn’t say he made things better, just that it is clear he is trying to repay the devotion Dick has always gave him).
Bruce can not imagine his life without his oldest. It is a super toxic relationship and no this is not what a parent child relationship should be but for what it’s worth, even at this relationships most dysfunctional, it does work. When they come together they are unstoppable.
#Bruce Wayne#Dick Grayson#Batman#dude don’t think of it as a real relationship#we know it’s toxic#but also Dick Grayson has a lot of symbolism that will always connect him to Bruce#where as I don’t think the other family members have this amount of foils and symbolism and metaphors that keep them stitched to Bruce
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The sea is wine red, this is the death of beauty
It’s so over for me chat
#can’t stop thinking about them they’re on my brain 24/7#ninjago#ninjago dragons rising#lego ninjago#dragons rising#ninjago raspberry#ninjago wolfcat#jordana x sora#jordana ninjago#dragons rising jordana#ninjago jordana#toxic yuri#sora dragons rising#sora ninjago#ninjago sora#I just remembered family members follow me it’s SO over#inkbagel art
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Do you have a favourite rain toad? I love them. They're so round and look grumpy even though they aren't.
Did you know that there are arboreal rainfrogs‽
[src]
Meet the genus Callulina, from the rainforests of Tanzania and Kenya
[src]
Who said you had to be lithe to take to the trees?
[src]
You may not like it, but this is what Peak Performance looks like.
#frog#frogs#animal#animals#rainfrog#rain frog#herpetology#this is what peak performance looks like#could these be the roundest arboreal frogs?#I think it is not unlikely#Certainly an interesting evolutionary choice#turns out you can indeed get you a guy who can do both#Callulina#I can Callulina and baby you can call me Al#on this blog we use 'toad' exclusively to refer to members of the family Bufonidae#bufonids are true toads#what really blew my mind just now is that one species of Callulina (C. meteora)#is pretty clearly a mimic of an arboreal toad (Nectophrynoides viviparus)#which is awesome#because N. viviparus is probably pretty toxic#but I do not know if Callulina are toxic#so I am very curious if the mimicry is Müllerian or Batesian
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for the ask game (1)
au where bruce is attracted to his robins and batgirls. he tries not to think about it or act on it, but it's getting more difficult with every new member of his team he acquires. does anyone know? do the robins and batgirls notice his weird behavior? what do they do about it? do they ever find out the truth? who would think it's terrible and who would find it strangely hot/comforting/nice? does bruce ever act on his feelings?
for the ask game!
oh my GOD do i have thoughts for AUs like this, i love this shit so dearly, dirtybadwrong Bruce who's trying to keep a lid on it my beloved.
i think the fun of this AU is if characters would notice Bruce lusting for themselves vs would they notice Bruce lusting for a different Robin/Batgirl. like does Dick pick up on it when it's just him and Bruce? no, because it's just. him and Bruce. he and Bruce are weird and complicated and hold endless bounds of nuance. that's just How Bruce Is, and Dick is the "test run", in a sense. he knows Bruce is new to this whole sidekick/family thing and is giving Bruce grace for being rough around the edges. but when Bruce starts looking at Jason or Tim or Cass that way, that's when Dick starts to notice. it's never enough of a suspicion he feels justified to bring it up, but the thought lingers. he's hyperaware and grows less and less comfortable with leaving them alone with Bruce. it's a weird game of chicken, Dick and Bruce staring each other down when Bruce's touch lingers too long. each waiting for the other to say something first. if Bruce ever broke and actually acted on his feelings, Dick would be eaten alive by the guilt of knowing something was up, but never saying something until it was too late.
obviously, Cass would know. there's no world where Cass *doesn't* know, the nature of who and what she is would immediately clock it. but the issue is, Cass doesn't have a good framework of what family looks like. she doesn't really understand familial vs romantic love bc she has no firsthand experience of what a parent's love should even look like. so she never calls it out. she just watches. i'm a fan of Cass believing this is normal and believing she too can express and act on attraction that's vaguely incestuous. maybe it's with Babs, maybe it's with Dick or Tim or Bruce himself. but she recognizes this as Normal and Accepted within the Batfamily, so it severely fucks up her understanding of familial love and i just. man it's my favorite thing about Cass in Batcest honestly, is how you can play with her lack of experience with love, boundaries, and sexuality.
Tim is the fun one for me. because my favorite flavor of BruTim is when Tim knows, as he agrees to be Robin, that there's a non-zero chance that Bruce is going to be Weird and agrees anyway because he's decided it's an acceptable risk. so Tim knows from the get-go because he's expecting it. if Bruce acts on his attraction, i think it's either with Tim or Cass first, because they're the most likely to confront him about it in a way that isn't entirely negative. Tim has accepted it's a possibility and Cass just seeks being loved and touched so. it leads to the first time someone's ever confronted Bruce about it. and the thing is, Bruce really doesn't like confrontation about his flaws. the first time Tim tries to imply he's okay with it, Bruce would lash out at the idea, tell Tim how inappropriate that is and benches Tim for a week. it'd probably take a united front from Cass and Tim to get Bruce to even *admit* to the attraction. still Bruce wouldn't allow it to happen and he brushes them off until finally, the dam breaks. it's fun if there's a cause like sex pollen, but i think it's *more* fun if it's just. a random fucking Tuesday and finally Bruce is at his limit. he has no real reason, there's nothing particularly different about that day's routine. he just sees Tim or Cass striping armor and sighs and gives in.
i don't think Steph, Jason, or Babs would notice until anything substantial happened. not because they're not wicked smart, but just because none of them were looking for it. Jason put Bruce on a pedestal when he was alive, and when he came back from the dead he wasn't close enough to be noticing Bruce's interpersonal dynamics outside of his narrow scope. Steph has no real framework for what healthy fatherhood looks like, so if Bruce's touches linger, if he stares too long, she just shrugs and assumes it's how it is. and Babs was just never quite close enough to Bruce to notice. if and when she notices, is when actual sexual things start to happen between Cass and Bruce. because Cass would see no reason to hide it. Babs would be pissed, but it'd be tricky to navigate. Cass would be an adult, even if she's only 18/19, so technically, she's old enough to be consenting. if nothing else, Bruce is a careful man. even when he breaks and gives in to his desires, he covers his tracks well. he makes sure he has enthusiastic consent and there's no legal recourse that could be taken. age of consent and all that. there's not much Babs can *do* other than try to tell Cass (and/or Tim) that this isn't normal or okay. not that it gets her anywhere, but god would she try.
by the time Duke comes along (if we venture out of the pre-Flashpoint era) i think it's a sort of. open secret, in the Batfamily. talked about in nothing but hushed whispers and knowing glances. at some point, they've all had sex with Bruce, caving all for different reasons. some more than others. Tim sees it as a duty, Cass sees it as a way of seeking comfort, Steph sees it as getting Bruce's approval for once, etc. it's never forced on them, but eventually, they all come to Bruce sooner or later. and that's the fun irony of it, i think. they try to convince the others not to, but would go to Bruce on their own well. because complicated reasons they can't put into words. sometimes, Bruce is just a messy man who doesn't realize how prized his Attention to for the rest of the Batfamily. that weird duality of not liking him, but also wanting desperately for him to like you. all of them have dealt with it, at some point. so for Duke, it takes a while for him to understand this... whole dynamic. it's Cass who tries to explain it to him, and he's a little horrified, a lot confused. especially when Bruce starts staring at him a little too long as well. i think he'd only want to watch first but well. they all cave eventually.
also fun bonus if we venture into the Dark Knight Returns universe for my bestest girl Carrie Kelley: there's such a like, "i'm fucking around and i'm finding out" vibe to Carrie. like Tim, she's very proactive in just. deciding she's going to be Robin and she's ready for whatever that entails. (IMO canon Carrie is closer to fanon Tim than canon Tim is but *that* deserves its own post-) like she takes one look at the old man that is Batman and goes yup. he's never fucking getting rid of me now. if Bruce started having weird feelings about her, i think she'd have *fun* with it. she's decided she's in it for the long haul and for whatever being Robin means so. she's almost teasing about it, seeing how hard she can push before Bruce snaps. since it's an older, gruffer Bruce, i think he'd express open annoyance at it first, almost a sort of banter about how Carrie behave. but of course he caves and Carrie leans into it, because there's a fun in having all of Bruce's attention to herself. in the main timeline, Bruce is pretty split with so many Robins and Batgirls, but during their era, it's *just* her and him and she's very proud she's got him all to herself.
#bruce fucks/lusts after every batfam member and they all want to protect each other from him#but also they're all going to fuck him anyway bc they're hypocrite and self sacrificial.#necrotic answerings#ask game#brudick#brujay#brutim#brucass#brusteph#brubabs#bruduke#brucarrie#batcest#did i get all the ship names? god i hope so#listen i'm a pre-flashpoint girlie but know i believe there should be more duke in batcest spaces.#let him in on the fun. stop calling him the normal one. let him ALSO be toxic and gay damnit#though trying to figure out their ship name i cackling at the thought of it being bruke or duce. it's so fucking funny to me and idek why#also let carrie into batcest spaces damnit. there's so few bruce/carrie fics you're all uninspired /lh#anyway yeah i'm obsessed with the vibes of#does anyone like bruce? no but his attention. his approval. the things most of the batkids would do for it#i think you could do bruce/helena b with these vibes too#but ngl i got do mad at the batman: brave & the bold show for doing helena dirty by just making her hot for bruce#that i mentally tune that ship out#it's good. it has good potential for daddy issues.#but it just reminds me of how fucking *ass* helena is in that show. they fucked up my bbygirl.#idk why ppl like b:tb&tb so much. i don't think it's good??#is it nostalgia or something? like there's so many other better batman animated shows that can like. write women. idk that's just me#anyway love this concept so dearly <3#bruce who is so fucking bad at love he can't separate familial and romantic love my beloved <3#bruce wayne having *boundaries*? absolutely not in my good catholic batcest home.
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Oh on top of that! She also lied about how I sent a hateful comment on her mother’s obituary website when I don’t even know the website! She also frequently lies about being pregnant & having miscarriages and also faked a positive pregnancy test just so her ex boyfriend wouldn’t dump her but he in-fact did, Did I also mention that she steals my content? Whenever she found out I was writing with OC’s she would take one of my OC’s and make separate stories for them but slightly connected to whatever I was or am writing without my consent/permission and this was a very frequent thing. I have no update on whether the police went to her house after I filed the report but thats what my life currently looks like atm!
She has body shamed me countless of times followed with one of her friends since I was 13 to the point where I had gotten involved with ED’s, I was clean for 5 months as you guys knew but unfortunately I have had to restart that progress especially healing from my trauma she had used against me. She had also mocked me for being autistic and calling me r slurs and whenever I confronted her about it bothering me she would always say she was “just joking.”
I have since blocked her on every social media platform & email address she uses along with her variety of phone numbers to prevent her from communicating with me or steal my content. If you guys see any ffs related to my work as-well as OC’s you guys know I own/created let me know immediately.
This is all LITERALLY occurring a week before my birthday to the literal point where I can’t even enjoy my birthday or pre birthday week plans right now let alone upload content that I would like to publish due to how much this has taken a toll on me. So yeah! Thats my life update!

🏷️ list: @alyyaanna @ginswife @coolpastelartshoe @greatkoalawizard @cokolin044 @kotoriarlert @alicerosejensen @bunnybot55 @mini-rollins @southerngirl41 @harmshake @femdisa @kabloswrld @claymoresofinfamy23 @bones-rhodes @cococodysleevlesshoodie @edtomh @ihatecodyrhodes @ayeeitsali @lisatommo28
I had to file a report the police recently on my own cousin from NC for borderline harassing me & my family after she used my gr00m1ng trauma against me and called me a “entitled brat” because I called her out for basically being envious, narcissistic & downright psychopathic when she got mad at me that I was getting closure for smth I needed months ago just a week before my own birthday! How cute right guys!

#writing memes#writing prompts#romance writing#writing stuff#writers block#stolen work#writers#writer#female writers#writeblr#writers on tumblr#writing#writers and poets#writerscommunity#writer stuff#psycho#toxic family#toxic family members#ex best friend#toxic bestfriend#toxic people#awareness#ableism#bullying#eating disoder trigger warning#tw eating issues
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sorry for not being as active recently in terms of writing, im kinda going through a bit of a rough time recently and im hoping to be more active soon :/ ily all sm !
#rose rambling#the ao3 curse is real#like actually#in the past 3 months ive gone through a whole new arc of my life bro#as in i have a family member in the hospital my dog was injured i had exams toxic grandparents reaching out had to up my medication*#*almsot had a falling out w one of my best friends got cheated on and had one of my other close family members open up to me about sh#and on top of that i have been having a terrible bout of night terrors and i genuinely can not sleep like. at all which hasn't happened in#YEARS#not to vent but like#help.
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While I do like a good shen bros fic in theory, I've also noticed that woobified characterizations of shen yuan tend to flock to those types of stories. Which leads to a very common scene were shen yuan will say something like "so sorry my brother is abusing you, but you must understand that he had a hard childhood😔😔" To luo binghe. Like, no. Even if it was a shen yuan pidw native au, I have trouble imagining he would be like that. I wouldn't say he would have the perfect reaction and response to the luo binghe situation but I don't think he would be like that. Just not my cup of tea personally, sorry.
Scenes like that always remind me of that one scene in the children's book series/tv show series of unfortunate events where an adult tells the beaudelaire children "its complicated. I know Sir can be prickly, but you have to understand, he had a very bad childhood."
To which klaus, one of the children, replies with "I understand. I'm having a very terrible childhood right now."
#i dont know where im going with this maybe id be interested if the shen bros had a more strained relationship after theyve grown into adult?#i know shen yuan is a toxic fan that stands behind their cancelled faves. but he also loves children.#but i think he would not endorse or excuse a family member that abuses (and secretly tries to murder) children.#but idk#thats just me!#everyone has their own tastes and preferences and thats ok!#svsss#scum villains self saving system#throwaway post#fanfic talk
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Nestas Story time:
• How my family locked me up in a house on a mountain and the only way out are going down 10000 steps 😊🏡🏔️
• How I banged and married my rehab supervisor 👰💞
• How my husband made me hike till I wanted to k!ll myself 😌🙏
• How I fell down 10000 steps and my husband laughed at me 🤭↘️
• How my brother in law wants to kill me 🥰🪦
• How everybody hates me because I was a traumatized and abused child 😎✌️
#some family members are loving some family members are toxic and some family members want to k!ll you#acotar critical#anti acotar#anti sjm#sjm critical#anti rhysand#anti ic#anti inner circle#pro nesta#anti nessian
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