#too many neurodivergent headcanons are autism and ADHD

[awakefor48hours]

Quick, share a neurodivergent headcanon that isn’t ADHD and/or autism

[brightlotusmoon]

Bringing this back for research purposes and fanfiction.

So, my ADHD support group on Facebook was talking about lateral thinking, common for those of us with ADHD and/or Autism and both. And, of course, it made me think about my favorite canon ADHD character, TMNT Michelangelo, who is the definition of lateral thinking in every incarnation, who went undiagnosed until confirmed in the 2012 cartoon and 2016 film, carried into Rise Of The TMNT.

"Lateral thinking is a manner of solving problems using an indirect and creative approach via reasoning that is not immediately obvious. It involves ideas that may not be obtainable using only traditional step-by-step logic. The term was first used in 1967 by Edward de Bono.

In logical thinking you attempt to solve a problem following a process in which each step must be reasonable and logical. In lateral thinking you can take steps or follow routes that are obviously unreasonable and beyond logic."

I've probably never had a moment of logical thinking in my life. No wonder I failed at math so much. Uh, aside from the dyscalculia.

Yay, Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria and Hyper-empathy, I guess.

[azuremist]

Haruka isn’t autistic-coded – he has an intellectual disability (and why that matters)

(AO3 Mirror)

A lot of people in the MILGRAM fandom (especially English-speaking MILGRAM fandom) state that Haruka is autistic-coded, as if it’s fact. Most recognize that Haruka is coded as disabled. (If you didn’t recognize that, I hope this post will help to explain why.) However, to state that he is coded as autistic specifically is incorrect. Haruka is coded as intellectually disabled.

Now, there are likely two things that contribute to this issue. One is the invisibility of intellectual disability as a whole, and another is the fact that a lot of this has to do with things that only someone who speaks Japanese would understand (such as complex vs non-complex words in Japanese).

In this post, I plan to lay out what an intellectual disability is and how it differs from neurodivergencies such as autism or ADHD. After that, I want to discuss the way Haruka speaks and uses words, the symbolism in his MVs, and how this lends to him being coded as intellectually disabled. Finally, I want to discuss why this even matters at all. Because, in truth, viewing Haruka as autistic instead of intellectually disabled leaves the viewer misunderstanding his story in a huge way that seems far too common in English-speaking MILGRAM fandom. So, I hope you listen to what I have to say.

What does it mean to be intellectually disabled?

Confusing autism and intellectual disability (henceforth referred to as ID) is not an issue unique to the MILGRAM fandom. They are quite commonly mistaken for each other, in the same way that autism and ADHD are both commonly mistaken for each other. And for the same reason, too – autism and ID are comorbid. This means that, if someone is autistic, they are more likely to have an ID. For this reason, it makes perfect sense to headcanon Haruka as autistic. I headcanon him as autistic, myself, actually. But, in this post, I’m going to be strictly talking about his coding, not headcanons, and he is very specifically coded with an ID.

So, what’s the difference? In the words of the National Institutes of Health, “Whereas ID is associated with general deficits across developmental domains, ASD is in fact defined by the observation that social communication deficits are particularly impairing.” (Source)

To say this in layman’s terms, autism is primarily characterized by difficulties in social communications. Cognitive abilities in autistic individuals vary, just like with allistic individuals, but the defining features are issues with social interaction and nonverbal communication. Autism by itself effects how effectively one communicates, but not intelligence. On the other hand, ID is a limitation on intellectual functioning, just like the name implies. This causes issues in areas like learning, problem-solving, and abstract reasoning.

A lot of people think ID is a synonym for ‘learning disability’. ‘Learning disability’ is an umbrella term that covers things such as dyslexia and dysgraphia. This isn’t the case. For one thing, ID can be a diagnosis on its own. ID is subdivided into syndromic ID, where intellectual deficits are present with other signs and symptoms, and nonsyndromic ID, where ID is, itself, the diagnosis. Examples of syndromic IDs include fragile X syndrome, and Down syndrome. For another, those with learning disabilities tend to have average to above-average intellectual abilities. Their disorder affects their ability to acquire and process information, but they are still able to learn. In contrast, ID affects the ability to learn at all, as well as affecting development and general function.

ID is a debilitating disorder. Many people with an ID cannot live independently, require help with self-care activities, and have limited communicative abilities. Understanding this – particularly, how ID is often a disability that requires a caregiver – is a key point to understanding Haruka as a character. But that’s to be covered later.

Words

The reason why this is a problem in the English fandom specifically is because the main thing tipping off the viewer to Haruka’s ID is the way that he speaks.

‘Weakness’, Haruka’s first-trial song, is written entirely in INCREDIBLY basic, elementary-level kanji – mostly hiragana and katakana. In fact, his first-trial song is misspelled in a lot of official releases of the song (‘Weekness’), which is a good way to get the same effect across. This is not the case across all platforms, though, for whatever reason. He also writes, in his trial 1 interrogation, with only that elementary-level kanji; often only one-word answers. The only complicated characters he knows are usually ones that mean something along the lines of, “I’m a stupid, idiot child,” which can be assumed to be because that’s what he has heard his whole life.

While I’m unsure if it is ENTIRELY in this basic kanji, his second trial song and interrogation is at least mostly written like this, as well. At this point, Muu is teaching him how to read and write (or, that’s what’s implied), but, even with that one-on-one attention, he is still speaking like a child most of the time to the Japanese ear.

When he’s forced to use or listen to words outside of this elementary-level kanji, he gets audibly confused, as well. In the AVIOT earbud collab, he has the voiceline, “Pairing seems to be in progress,” but, if you listen, he says “pairing” like it’s a question. (“Pair-ing?”) He doesn’t know the word is an English loanword that isn’t often used in everyday conversation, so he’s struggling to say it.

He also struggles when speaking to Es in his interrogations. He tries to say, “I will acknowledge any falsehood or silence,” but the words used are very advanced in Japanese. As such, he struggles with it, repeating, “False-hood? Si-lence?” Multiple similar exchanges happen in his interrogations, with Haruka misunderstanding words Es uses, and stuttering over unfamiliar words. The implication is that Haruka struggles with higher vocabulary or unfamiliar words, and with speaking and communication in general. He apologizes multiple times to Es for struggling, saying that he is not intelligent as an explanation multiple times. Additionally, in his second trial investigation, he talks about how he could never do the same things as everyone around him. When Es calls him stupid, he agrees. Es even states, “You really have no learning ability whatsoever.” When, mind you, having delayed or slowed learning is, like, the symptom of intellectual disability. It’s quite blatant. (Why is this not fandom consensus yet, again?)

Moving on from the point of how Haruka uses words, we can talk about other forms of word-based MILGRAM media. For example: when introducing himself, he says he thinks he’s 17, which implies that he isn’t actually sure. Additionally, there is lots of evidence for his intellectual disability in his interrogation questions:

He considers it impossible to learn another language

His dream is to ‘live normally’

He states he disappointed his father (not inherently an ID-related thing, but also, makes sense with his coding in mind)

Many answers imply that he’s been unable to live his own life, and he doesn’t really have any aspirations outside of being given attention

Finally, we have the lyrics to his songs. Again, on top of being written in very basic kanji, we have lines like the following, which include repeated themes of needing a caregiver (being ‘hopeless’ by himself), not being able to do what others can do, hating how he was born, and struggling to function. (I have bolded examples that I think are especially apt.)

“Why was I born like this? Why does it hurt so much?” / “Why was I born to be me? Why does it hurt so much?”

“Instead you kept calling me “hopeless” / You never called me by my name / You were always comparing me to someone else”

“If I tried and couldn’t say it, you would get angry at me and say “You’re hopeless”” / “When I tried to understand it, you’ll make that disappointed face again”

“I just wanted to be your good boy” (what did the MILGRAM team want us to think when they included this line? likely that he’s childish or ‘hasn’t grown up’, right?)

“Mommy, look / I’ve done great” (calling her ‘mommy’ instead of ‘mom’ – again, ask what the MILGRAM team wants us to think when they included this)

“If only I could do what anyone else could do”

“It’s enough, I am a “disappointment””

“My life started in a wrong spot”

With regards to his relationship with Muu, he doesn’t understand why Muu using him would be a bad thing, or how she is manipulating him. People with ID tend to have poor judgment, and Haruka not being able to tell the difference and not caring about the difference between negative and positive attention shows this (although his trauma definitely also plays a role).

Finally, we have the trial song titles.

We’ve already discussed how “Weakness” is sometimes alternatively misspelled as “Weekness”, and that is because the title in Japanese is, arguably, misspelled, too. The Japanese title is a play on the phrase jakuniku kyoushoku, which is equivalent to the English phrase, “Survival of the fittest.” More directly, it translates to, “The weak are meat, the strong do eat.” The character for “strong” (kyou) is replaced by “together” (also kyou) – with the implication being that Haruka forgot which version of the word was correct for this situation. This also works to create a pun, of sorts, as this makes the title more like, “The weak are meat, communal eating”, creating an emphasis on the fact that there are more people eating than there are ‘weak people’. There are differing ways to interpret this pun, but one way is to view it as a statement on Haruka’s status as a minority, oppressed (‘eaten’) by the majority.

On the other hand, we have All-Knowing and All-Agony. In Japanese, this song title is Zenchi Zennou, which can be translated as “Omniscient and Omnipotent”, used to describe the Christian God. Once again, we have what we can assume is Haruka misspelling the title, creating a pun. One that is much more on the nose, as the character for “ability” (nou) is replaced with the character for “worry, distress, pain” (also nou).

It seems that the reason why Haruka uses new complicated words (aside from the words meaning “idiot” and the like) in All-Knowing and All-Agony is because Muu is teaching him. It features the more complicated “食” (shoku; food), when we know from Haruka’s 2023 birthday portal that Muu is bringing him meals. It also prominently features Muu’s name, 夢 (yume; dream), which is more complicated, as well.

Imagery

Now, we get on to the non-verbal, more visually-based evidence for Haruka’s ID. Be prepared for a lot more images!

Going back to Muu teaching Haruka how to write: it’s not just clear in his usage of kanji, but also how he writes. Comparing his handwriting, it becomes much easier to read after Trial 2’s start, and his writing is soft and bubbly; much like a teen girl’s writing might be.

All of these improvements are able to be linked back to Muu (both his style of writing and in the more complicated words that he knows), who we know is looking after him. Considering this, it’s pretty clear why he sees her like a maternal figure.

One of the Minigram comics shows the prisoners eating curry udon together. Of the four shown (Amane, Haruka, Shidou and Mahiru), Amane and Haruka are the only two who make messes out of their clothes. Since the other two characters in the comic have active roles, and Haruka has the most passive one, Haruka’s inclusion can be assumed to be because he is the only prisoner aside from the child, Amane, who would make a mess while eating.

Childish themes and imagery are seen scattered throughout his MV, as well, especially his first one. He draws with the skill level of a child, which is a very prevalent motif, and he is shown to sleep with a plushie.

Additionally, he seems to have trouble putting on his clothes. He wears two entirely different socks – not just different colors, but also two different lengths. His pant legs are also two different lengths when he tries to roll them up in his Trial 2 art, and he seems to exclusively wear slip-on shoes up until he befriends Muu (where we can presume that she begins helping him, and even then, they're not done properly).

There are various visual parallels drawn between himself as a child and himself as he is now (for example, the way that his clothes are a mix of his current shirt and the vest he wore as a child in All-Knowing and All-Agony), and he often compares himself to a child wanting praise.

Even the violent acts that Haruka is shown committing are also a sign of an ID. People with IDs tend to have meltdowns, and devolve into fits of violence. The reasons for these meltdowns vary depending on the person, but reasons can include anger / frustration (especially in reaction to not being able to communicate well), sensory overload, and confusion.

You may note that Haruka’s mother reacts the exact wrong way for dealing with these meltdowns. When trying to help someone experiencing a meltdown, especially a violent meltdown, the last thing you want to do is appear frightened. The number one piece of advice everyone gives for helping someone experiencing a meltdown is to remain calm. It’s also not advised to leave the person alone, either, because that sends the message, “I want to avoid you when you feel this way.” (Which I suppose, for a neglectful mother like Haruka’s, would be technically accurate, but still not at all helpful.)

It only makes sense that Haruka’s tantrums continue to get worse and worse.

But after the meltdowns fade, he seems to not understand what he’s done. He’s shown experiencing fear and confusion after he hurts something, even shown as his child self at one point. A major part of IDs is being unable to connect actions to consequences.

Finally, we go onto his body language. Frankly, I considered putting, “Imagine this as a real person doing these things and not an anime boy, and you’ll see my point.” Which is true. But I decided to go a little more in depth.

Swaying is heavily associated with people with IDs. This is, in part, because people with IDs have reduced postural balance, and general body balance. Because of that lack of postural balance, people with IDs tend to slump quite heavily, as well. Both of these traits are shown very obviously with Haruka, in All-Knowing and All-Agony.

In the same MV, he’s also shown biting his nails. Like autistic people, people with IDs stim, and this could also be a version of hand mouthing (repetitive contact between the hands and the mouth / tongue), which is also heavily associated with / often seen in intellectually disabled people. He's also shown doing this in promo art.

So, why does this matter?

Haruka being intellectually disabled is a huge part of his story, and, when taking it into consideration, it changes how one views his story a lot.

Haruka being treated better as a child makes more sense with this framework. He wants to return to when he was a child because his level of intellect then was seen as more ‘normal’. There wasn’t as much obviously ‘wrong’ with him yet. Children are expected to be a little slow, but it’s when they remain that way that many parents begin to become concerned. He yearns for when his mother didn’t know he was disabled, and when she treated him better for that reason.

Haruka being severely neglected / abused by his mother would be awful, no matter what, but him being intellectually disabled makes it so much worse. He needs attention and care from his caregivers even more so than the average child does, because he has trouble even functioning on the day-to-day without help. This is why he thrives under Muu’s care; she is meeting his support needs. Likely not perfectly (she’s just a teenage girl, and she is almost certainly not trained or educated in this regard), but even with the amount of support that she is able to give, Haruka is thriving. He’s more confident, he’s learning how to write, and he’s eating more consistently.

Without that care, he struggles so severely that he melts down regularly, going into fits of violence over the fact that his support needs aren’t being met (on top of all of the other emotional baggage that comes with any child being neglected by their parent). Haruka’s mother continued to ignore these cries for attention, for help, for care… Until it went too far.

The way that Haruka’s story is viewed changes drastically with this information. If Haruka was autistic, it would affect very few of the things that I listed. So much of Haruka's story hinges on specifically his intelligence level, not how he socializes. And do you have any idea how many people I’ve seen say, “He’s a neurodivergent with a shitty mom, but so am I, and I didn’t kill anyone about it”? No. If you are not intellectually disabled, you do not get to compare your experiences as if they are equal. If you don’t have an ID, your experiences cannot be compared in this way.

Haruka has a debilitating disability that requires support which he was not getting. He was experiencing ableist abuse at the hands of his mother, and he didn’t know how to handle it. All of his violence happened during his meltdowns, and his disability makes it harder for him to connect his actions to the consequences, or find alternate ways to solve his problems – this is all extremely important information and context when you’re discussing whether or not his crime is forgivable.

If you still don’t forgive him, that’s alright. But to neglect this aspect of his character is, to be frank, baffling, if you’re trying to participate in the spirit of the series and understand everyone’s crime to the fullest extent. And to make jokes, comparing your own experiences to Haruka’s, since you assume him to be neurodivergent and nothing else, does a huge disservice to his story! And, when it’s done to demean him? It honestly comes off a slight bit ableist.

So, I’d like everyone to keep this information in mind moving forward. Don’t infantilize Haruka for his disability. But do consider this information in your analysis posts, your discussions, and so on. I’d like to see this become common knowledge in the MILGRAM fandom, especially since the idea of him being specifically autistic-coded is so widespread by this point.

Thank you!

[foressfaction]

Welcome to my silly blog

Heya. I’m Toby/Tobias some people can call me Twat I guess. I am fond of the nickname TobyTot too it’s cute. I am an adult and make content here for fandoms. At the moment it’s Creepypasta. I am an artist, writer and cosplayer.

You’ll probably see me post my art, writing and cosplays here. I have other socials too I can list below.

- Tiktok: Foressfaction

- Instagram: foressfactionn/hxtchetsout/t0byb0y

I mainly draw and cosplay mainly from the Slenderverse/Creepypasta universe

I post things like my Toby rewrite, silly little one shot stories of ships or scenarios I am fond of.

I am working on a comic called Dystopia. It’s based on mostly slenderverse

I have an Oc I post here often. Here’s some more on him —> Cross-X info sheet

I am THE Toby enthusiast so expect lots of rambles and art of him. He’s the guy ever.

I’m open for dms and asks if you feel welcome to!

I enjoy the grunge aesthetic and plants, I love many genres of music and art. I do digital art and traditional along with some painting though what I post here will be more digital. I write passionately about my interests and characters. Cats, raccoons and foxes are my current favorite animals. I enjoy orange and green toned things. I like forests and going out into nature when ever I can (and my body let me.) I take photography photos of said forests and trips I take. I enjoy piercings and have a few myself, along with sour flavored things. I absolutely love the smell of lavender and won’t leave the house unless I reak of it (real) I am protective of my friends and partner and will give the world for them. I am not in a relationship at the moment.

I love horror movies, Scream being my favorite franchise, followed closely by Jaws and many many shark films and documentaries. I am a film fanatic and will talk during movie theatres…. I aspire to become a film director and make my own stories and bring them to life via film. I love the ocean and sea creatures. SHARKS. I will ramble about sharks and other interests. I tend to speak a lot on certain topics easily even if it was started over something completely different. I can probably talk for hours on voice calls. I play Genshin sometimes and Roblox mainly at the moment. I own a cat and his name is Mr fuggles and another whose name is Nim Nims. I named them both hop off.

I am neurodivergent and need tone tags, I am diagnosed ADHD and Anxiety disorders so be weary of those things. I am not easily offended or set off unless my friends are hurt. I have (at the moment) undiagnosed Autism. I take that very lightly as again I am not medically recognized due to financial problems but I will state it anyways to let people know it’s a possibility.

My favorite current ships at the moment are (they are links)

-Tack/Ticcijack

- Ticciwork

Table of contents for my writing and rants (they are links)

Toby Headcanons

Toby Family Headcanons

Friends one shot

Rewrite link on wattpad

Origin of Cross-x on Quotev

Fatal instinct mini fic

Nails mini fic

Unposted headcanons

[turtle-steverogers]

a lot of your hcs about Steve give me neurodivergent feelings and I was wondering if you feel like Steve is autistic or perhaps just has a lot of sensory issues/social issues because of the serum and his life experience that can he comparable to experiences people with autism have?

also if you do Steve as autistic, do you think he'd ever seek a diagnosis? what would his reaction be? my bff finally got her diagnoses for autism and ADHD earlier this week and she was so relieved and happy to finally have doctors listen to her. idk something about her happiness made me think of steve because he makes me happy too.

(your blog makes me very happy too xx)

hello hello hello!

you just unlocked my most precious and dead headcanon, oh anon. i do, in fact, headcanon steve as autistic. part of it is self-indulgent projection, and i certainly expand on traits that are already there in a direct way to maintain that headcanon, but i do also feel like it's not entirely out of the ballpark for him as a character!

the second part of your question is really interesting, and my answer is... maybe? i have an ongoing RP with a friend where he was diagnosed by a therapist, not because he sought a diagnosis, but because this particular therapist saw the traits within him and recommended he seek one, and honestly, i feel like that is probably most accurate to how it would go for him seeing as autism wasn't a prevalent or talked about thing in any casual capacity before the ice, so he wouldn't really... know to seek out a diagnosis/connect that certain perspectives, ways he views the world, and struggles he may have align with autism. but i love the thought that once he is diagnosed, so many personal questions are answered, and he is able to go on a journey to recontextualize things for himself and begin to accommodate and celebrate himself! so yes, relief is a very strong result of that for him, i'm sure

[causeofmayhem]

Hiya, can I request a botw/totk Link x nuerodivergent reader?

If that's not the kind of stuff you'd write, that's totally okay!!

Ofc dear reader! Thank you for your request !! (ı'm gonna write it as a headcanon, since it wasn't specified what kinda fanfic was wanted. Also this is both GN and can be seen as both Platonic and Romantic.)

Don't judge me on this but I feel like he's a bit neurodivergent himself.

He's a great cook, as we all know, and he will make sure that he knows your taste palette in and out and will make sure to not Cook anything that causes you sensory issues.

If you get overstimulated by loud noises, he will try his best to comfort you (while also not knowing how)

I feel like he mirrors a lot, so if you stim around him he will mirror your actions.

Some days he might go nonverbal, for many reasons ranging from flashbacks to just not feel like talking, but he is always there to listen

ESPECIALLY TO YOUR SPECIAL INTERESTS OMG

He's like the best listener. I feel like you could rant to him for hours and he would still be as interested as ever.

Speaking of special interests;

I feel like he would really be into exploring, hiking whatnot and would always invite you to come along.

And cooking too. He would constantly cook for you, to the point where all your comfort foods are now his cooking.

If you are having a tantrum, or a bad episode, he will be there with all you need while looking at you with sad puppy eyes.

He'd take you sheild surfing to feel better.

I feel like after the events of ToTK, he would be more verbal and also stim more if that makes sense.

Like, just more comfortable.

Now, I would lastly like to note that neurodivergency is not just Autism and ADHD, and no matter where you fall under the spectrum, he would be respectful and caring.

Aaaand that's it! Thank you for requesting, and while my post was mainly on Autism, ADHD and ADD, I would gladly do another post going in depth on how link would be like with people who fall under the other terms under the umbrella, if requested. This might be oversharing but I have BPD and CPTSD, so I know what it's like to be underrepresented and misread. Again, if anyone wants fanfics or HCs with other Neurodivergencies I am totally down to write that !!

[ghostr0tz]

please please share your vox neurodivergent headcanons

*smacks the top of his head* this bad boy can fit SO many problems and disorders in him.

but before we start i do want to say i am saying this all as personal headcanons as someone with my own laundry list of issues. Okay lets go:

HEAVYYYYY on Autism. Has a VERY strict routine he sticks to and gets sooo fucking irritated when it gets interrupted. The only except is if its a Vee and its something Important to them (he still gets petty about it though). It mostly revolves around work.

He's extremely sensory seeking, and constantly fidgetting and stimming. He paces. A LOT.

Vox is very touchy to friends but will kill a stranger for bumping into him. Constantly touching Val's fluff and Velvette's nicer-feeling clothes.

LOVES compression . Makes Val lay on him all the time. He's like a personal weighted blanket. His body being partially mechanical makes his under-sensitive to stimuli. Hard for him to really process pain and managing it.

VERY opinionated and vindictive about his thoughts and takes. Takes it very personal if you disagree and will try SO hard to yell at you to see how he's right.

The Vees are constantly getting in debates that concern anyone around them but they all love it. They all fucking love arguing.

Special Interest in technology (new AND old), movies and shows (constantly rewatching classics), and biology. Does not let anyone get a SINGLE word in unless its questions when he's infodumping.

Probably has ADHD too. Talkative as shit when he feels hyperactive. Has such a strict routine with himself because he knows if he doesn't stick to it he WILL go insane and become a bit of a #disaster.

Medicated? Yes!!!! Remembers to take his medication? Also yes but ONLY because he's set so many alarms and reminds for himself.

He Has So Many Alarms For Everything. It drives the other Vees insane how his phone seems to go off every. other. fucking. minute.

Hard to keep Vox's attention on things and is constantly cycling through content like his life depends on it. Always has SOMETHING playing near him unless he's really overwhelmed from the day.

It doesn't take a whole lot to make him go nonverbal, usually plays captions on his face or has a speech assistant on his phone that sounds like him.

This bitch is SOOO Bipolar coded though. He's disinterested in a lot of life and usually in a depressive swing. His swings of mania are VERY bad and chaotic though (Stayed Gone is such a good mania portrayal . TO ME).

Alastor very much triggers his mania and psychosis probably before their split and very CLEARLY afterwards.

Also probably on the schizospectrum. Probably Schizoaffective?

Hallucinates when he's having mania swings and psychotic symptoms. Has some pretty bad delusions too about his power and status and definitely had them BEFORE he was an overlord. has delusions about his relationships too. (probably did NOT help when he and Al were on good terms. probably played a role in their split)

Also his glitches feel like tics to me and its important i say that or ill explode. He masks them pretty well in public and has gotten used to playing them off. But the Vees have gotten used to him accidentlly smackign them while ticcing.

okay i think thats it for now. hope you enjoyed my rambles :0 !

[dysfunctional-doodle]

too many turtles made me headcanon mutant mayhem mikey as having dyscalculia :]

do you have any neurodivergence headcanons for the turtles you want to share? (can be about what they have or what they do)

I hc mutant mayhem Donnie and Mikey as austistic (they literally had the autism rep stickers in the concept art for both of them so it’s kinda canon to me), and so are most of the Donatellos in some way, some higher on the spectrum than others because…it’s Donatello. Just like how I hc that most Michelangelos have ADHD or ADD, I see it not as a trait that defines their character but a trait that has helped build their personality in the best way possible :)

Also, mutant mayhem leo I hc as having an anxiety disorder that, like some anxiety disorders often do unfortunately, worsens as he grows more mature. And I hc that 2003 Leo suffered from depression in season 4 and still has episodes that his brothers help with. I actually have included this aspect in my future design of him - he has his brothers’ mask tails woven with his own to remind him that he is not alone and will always be supported by them.

And finally, Raphael. I hc that 2003 Raphael also has autism, hence his struggles with controlling his emotions and frustrations at change (for example, he was very uncomfortable in Fast Forward, when they travelled to the future).

Obviously no one has to agree with these, I only really hc them to aid me in writing their characters rather than draw attention/label any of the bros in Too Many Turtles just by these neurodivergencies

Feel free to discuss your own hcs, or disagree with mine! I am sorry if I offend anyone with any of these, I am very eager for some reeducation if I have accidentally offended anyone :)

[princesssarisa]

Autism (and possible ADHD) headcanon: Alice (Alice's Adventures in Wonderland/Through the Looking-Glass)

This analysis is based on the books, but most of it applies to Disney's Alice too.

Now of course she wasn't written with either autism or ADHD in mind: no concept of either existed when the books were written. Some people might argue that all the "evidence" below is just her being a seven-year-old child. But all these qualities make her relatable to neurodivergent people, and whose to say that she wouldn't be diagnosed as neurodivergent if she were a real person and lived today?

Autism evidence

*Alice is a very inward little girl. Not only do both books literally take place mostly in her mind, but even within her dreams she's constantly thinking, daydreaming, analyzing, and imagining things. She sometimes gets so lost in her thoughts and fantasies that she forgets all about what's currently happening, or about the other characters, and they sometimes notice this (e.g. "You're thinking about something, my dear, and that makes you forget to talk.").

*She constantly talks to herself and pretends to be two people.

*In what little we see of her life in the real world, she's never shown playing with children her own age. She's content to play by herself, talking to her kittens, creating elaborate fantasies, or even playing a game of croquet against herself.

*She's precocious and smart, with a good (though imperfect) memory for facts she's learned in school, and she likes to show off her knowledge, both to others and to herself. She knows many "grand words" that other children her age don't know (e.g. "latitude," "longitude," "jurors"), and she enjoys saying them out loud, even when she doesn't know what they mean. In Wonderland, when she tries to recite the lessons and poems she's memorized and finds herself comically mangling them, her core sense of self is shaken.

*Despite being sane and sensible compared to the fantasy characters she meets, Alice is more than a little eccentric herself. She constantly daydreams and talks to herself, as mentioned. She comes up with outlandish fantasies, like mailing Christmas presents to her own feet, or that different foods change people's temperaments, or that people in New Zealand and Australia walk upside-down. Her confusing experiences in Wonderland make her wonder if she's still Alice or if she's become a different person. The fact that her adventures in Wonderland and Looking-Glass Land are dreams make her seem all the more eccentric in hindsight: those two fantasy worlds and all the strange things in them are creations of Alice's own mind.

*Even though she tries to always be proper and polite, she sometimes makes offensive remarks without meaning to. For example, when she praises her cat Dinah's skill at catching mice and birds in front of a mouse and group of birds, or when she calls three inches "a wretched height" while talking to a three-inch caterpillar. She also throws manners aside and talks back to adults whenever she thinks they're being especially rude or unreasonable.

*She often seems to imitate the adults in her life. When she remembers to check the "Drink Me" bottle and make sure it's not marked "poison," or when she scolds herself for crying or for lolling on the grass, she's clearly parroting what she's heard from adults. Likewise, when she scolds the pig-baby for grunting, or her kitten for all its mischief and "bad manners," she's obviously affecting a tone that adults have taken with her. All the scolding and correcting she does, especially to herself, might also imply that she's a child who's been scolded and corrected especially often.

*She's often described as speaking "shyly" or "timidly" – though as mentioned, she can be bold to the point of impertinence when she's pushed far enough.

*She dislikes books without pictures, and she can make no sense of the poem Jabberwocky – even though its plot is easy for most real-world readers to follow – because there are too many made-up words in it. Now, these don't necessarily imply that she has trouble with reading comprehension, but they might.

*One throw-away line in Through the Looking-Glass implies that she's a picky eater. When she brings up the subject of having to go without meals as punishment, she says she would rather go without them than eat them anyway.

*She's particularly annoyed by certain small noises and sensations – like Bill the Lizard's pencil squeaking at the trial in the first book, or the Gnat's tiny sigh that tickles her ear in the second.

*Both stories consist of her wandering through nonsense worlds, being baffled by their strange rules and customs, and being ordered around, corrected, and judged negatively by the strange creatures she meets, just because her logic is different from theirs. For those of us on the autism spectrum, this is a relatable experience.

ADHD evidence

*She tends to be impulsive, particularly in the first book. For example, she goes down the rabbit hole without thinking of how she'll ever get out again, and later drinks the potion in the White Rabbit's house without knowing if it will make her grow or shrink just because she's anxious for some change in her size. This isn't a matter of not knowing better – she sometimes tells herself what she should do, only to act on her impulses anyway. Or, in other words, she gives herself very good advice, but she very seldom follows it.

*She can be verbally impulsive too: for example, her careless remarks about Dinah catching mice and birds.

*She's prone to daydreaming, as mentioned above.

*She sometimes has trouble controlling her emotions, most memorably when she cries a big pool of tears after growing to the size of a giant. She tells herself she should be ashamed for crying so much, but she can't stop.

*She can be easily distracted, especially by her own imagination, and in the first chapter of Through the Looking-Glass, she flits from subject to subject while talking to her kitten.

*She's easily bored and always in search (literally or figuratively) of some new adventure or amusement. One of the things she most dislikes is "having nothing to do."

[bettathanyou]

hii i just wanted to say i really appreciate how much love you put into all of your writings, its all so heartwarming and detailed, and you capture cedrics character SO well. you have such an in depth understanding of his personality and its commendable. i really admire your dedication and love for this guy and how willing you are to share it with others :]

but ya i have a request, a headcanon list (or story/anything u wanna do) of Cedrics autistic behavior and maybe how he would act with an autistic partner? the idea of there being this mutual understanding of each others needs is really sweet to me. also i personally hc him with adhd alongside autism so it would be neat if that could get mixed in somehow, too :D no problem if not!

ANON. WTF YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME CRY FR?? THAT MEANS SO MUCH TO ME, THANK YOU. I get so scared of MISCHARACTERIZING Cedric, so to hear that I have an in depth understanding of him from you made my entire day, month, YEAR. I hope this headcanon list is good and up to expectations!!

AuDHD Cedric The Sorcerer Headcanons (With Autistic S/O)

Coming from someone with AuDHD with an autistic best friend, I can't stress how much source material I have to speak about this sifkdiieis

FIRST THINGS FIRST. SENSORY ISSUES GALOREEEEE. That man will shrivel and die if he were ever in the modern era and came into direct contact with a microfiber towel.

A secret Headcanon I have (outside of the reasons I listed in my first headcanon list about Cedric!) Is he wears gloves BECAUSE Cedric has sensory/texture issues. His potion ingredients seem incredibly bizarre at times, and I'm sure the textures of them just get overwhelming at times. If you're wondering why the fingertips are exposed, he might need the extra grip to handle delicate objects, etc etc.

His robe is basically a weighted blanket, argue with the wall. He needs to be regulated somehow, and he's still a nervous wreck anyways

We know Cedric's speech is affected by his audhd. Dude has pedantic speech, overly emotive or deadpan, his volume control is non-existent when excited.

Expanding on that, his tendency to mix up words for spells seems a little... Neurospicy, on top of the anxiety

Forgets spells constantly. Not actually forget how to do them, just forgetting they exist cuz adhd

Has CHRONICALLY turned his workshop inside out because the thing Cedric was using just disappeared after he set it down!

(it was in his hand the whole time lol)

HC that outside of, yk, lack of personal space because no one knocks except Sofia, Autism rage whenever you're being interrupted from a task, especially something your fixated on, DRIVES HIM SO INSANE

Lack of patience. Just. Irritable, and same

His only friend (before Sofia) was an animal companion. C'mon y'all.

Music is so important to Cedric! It helps him regulate. He sings, he dances, he appreciates the dragon Acapella! Definitely uses music to stim, as well as dancing. He does it way too much. Audhd people usually are very connected to creative outlets such as music

Speaking of, his flying machine? CEDRIC IS AN INVENTOR. SO MANY INVENTORS ARE/WERE NEURODIVERGENT

Cedric is so genuinely shocked by kindness from Sofia even though she's consistent with it. That can definitely be trauma, but also feels like a lack of emotional permanence

Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria SO BADDDDD Cedric would have a shutdown about it (thanks ADHD)

Prone to more shutdowns than meltdowns. But as we know, shutdowns inevitably lead to meltdowns anyways. I hc that Cedric is definitely seen as "melancholic" because his mood shifts as well as masking (poorly) his mental state after having meltdowns in private

Definitely tugs at his hair, bites himself, hits his head/fists on hard surfaces during meltdowns :((

Cedric's job as royal sorcerer is fun for the knowledge as special interest aspect, but the social parts leaves him in bad burnout, at least before his redemption

Still hates the social aspect of his job though

Potions are his special interest

The amulet of avalor was a hyperfixation, there I said it!

Due to trauma, but also to adhd, I think Cedric has no emotional object permanence. Dude for real acts a little TOO shocked towards Sofias kindness-

There is two types of audhd: sarcasm is the only language they're fluent in, and cannot distinguish sarcasm to save their life. Cedric is the first.

Sofia is the second type LMAO

Where's the same outfit everyday. Like. Cedric would buy the same set of clothes/outfits because too many choices are just overwhelming, and too many textures are Bad

Speaking of textures, again

Picky eater

I've never seen Cedric eat anything except those jellybean looking candies at his parents house

Jellybean/sweets as a safe food

I hc personally that Cedric is familiar with food magic because he conjures his own meals. I can't imagine people would respect his needs/wants enough to be especially accommodating, so he did it himself

Cedric talks to children as equals because of the lack of social hierarchy due to autism

However with the royals his age he is desperately trying to please people for the sake of acceptance (mood)

Okay

Rapid fire s/o headcanons!

Y'all either talk for hours, or parallel play without a word

Doing Nothing Together While Vibing Is Essential

Even though y'all understand each other well, sometimes the weird social rules you force yourself to mask with still stick. So sometimes y'all will have to ask "are you mad or are you unmasked rn"

Same thing with sarcasm. Taking jokes too literally so then you gotta ask for clarification. At this point it just adds to the joke xD

Cuddling/hugs is the best because THE DEEP PRESSUREEEEE

But also don't touch me when I need space pls

Infodumping whenever the chances arise

Seeing cedrics eyes sparkle his smile lines crease when talking about something that excited him feels like the warmest ray of sunshine

Cedric will sometimes get distracted by how much he loves you and loves seeimh you being happy while infodumping and will ask you to repeat things while apologizing profusely

Cedric will buy you little comfort objects you like or give you cool things he finds

Pebbling!!!

Sometimes y'all need to sleep alone for the sake of space, but other nights you gotta be in each other's skin

And both are okay!

Laying in bed doing a separate activity until bedtime is a good compromise when one of you doesn't want to spend the night, but still wants time together

Switching hyperfixations

Adopting each other's vocal stims/speech mannerisms

Suddenly you're saying Merlin's mushrooms UNIRONICALLY

When shutdowns happen, y'all have communication cards! Very helpful for both parties :))

You both doodled in the margins of each other's communication cards

Cedric chronically loses his and you now you're just letting him use yours until they manifest again 😭

Meltdowns, Cedric needs to be alone. He just can't handle ANYONE seeing it, even you

You respect that... And take care of him afterwards with whatever he needs

Whatever way you need support during shutdowns/meltdowns, Cedric accommodates without question

Just

So much love and acceptance and CHOOSING to put in the work in your relationship

Anyways, that's all I got! Feel free to add on! TYSM for the ask!! This was so lovely and self indulgent to write lmaooo

[brightlotusmoon]

Happy Disability Pride Month 2023.

A little fanfic soundtrack "fuck yeah we're outcasts let's be heroes" music to wrap up a scene before bed.

Of course this song is very TMNT for me. It debuted the same year as TMNT 2012 and was a hyperfixation for months. I bounced and stimmed hard to this song, it was up there with "Ballad of Bodmin Pil" for personal themes.

I remember that after season 2 aired, I had a dream where I was standing on a rooftop with Michelangelo, after the Dimension X episode, screaming along to this song as interdimensional portals ripped the sky open, and we held hands and jumped down into one. I remember the sensation of flying. That was when I started thinking about writing fanfiction again after all those years, and I knew exactly what it would be about. And I wrote over a hundred thousand words in under two months, and my inner Mikey was so proud. And a few years later I made a Tumblr thinking it would just be occasional fandom essays on his character and psychology but ahaha it got away from me ooops, because fandom sucked me in and I made friends. Who liked my work.

Anyway, nostalgia plus dopamine. yay! Also, this is such a freaking Cold Fire Mikey song. Oh, and, you know, obviously disability advocacy like whoa. But I was a fan of mutants with psionics long before I was an advocate so, credit.

[katboykirby]

Autistic Beel is very real to me personally, as an autistic person (special interest, not very expressionate, etc). I also very much agree with the Satan and Levi headcanons too.

Oh this is interesting because I don't think I've heard about an autistic! Beel HC before? Usually (in my experience anyway) it's autistic! Levi and very very occasionally autistic! Satan

Now, full disclosure that I'm not autistic myself, so any information I'm familiar with comes from research + the experiences of my irl partner, who got his autism diagnosis as an adult. (I do have ADHD and I know that there's some relation/overlap there, but I'd still trust the words and experiences of actual autistic people over my own)

And I can definitely see some aspects of autism in Beel! Like you said, he doesn't tend to show much of any particularly strong emotions, at least not openly or on the surface - he tends to keep a fairly flat expression (and his usual frown could be interpreted as the classic neurodivergent "resting bitch face" aha) and his voice clips reflect this as well - he's definitely not as affective as say, Mammon or Asmo! Beel is a lot more quiet than his brothers, on average. He's not really very emotive or expressive outside of specific or extreme situations. Although, I don't tend to go for the romantic options with him or read his personal Devilgram stories all that often (since I'm a Satanfucker) but I'm aware that he's usually more emotive in romantic moments with MC, or when things get tense/dramatic with his family.

Speaking of which, something that we do occasionally see is Beel losing his temper and becoming very angry - to the point that he loses control of himself and goes on rampages. The most significant examples of this in the main story would be Lessons 4 and 5 of the original game, when he flies into a rage over some custard and ends up destroying half of MC's room; and the whole plotline in Nightbringer revolving around Beel's rampage at the royal castle that almost resulted in Diavolo having to lock him up because of how much destruction he caused. I know that "autism rage" is pretty negatively stereotyped (unfairly so, in my opinion) but anger is definitely a real struggle for individuals with Autism Spectrum Disorders

The whole food thing is definitely interesting in this context as well (and I assume this is what you meant by "special interest?" Lmk if I'm wrong) because Beel is the complete opposite of the common autism stereotypes when it comes to food! We often see the idea of autistic individuals having a very limited scope of foods that they actually enjoy, because things like texture, flavour, and sensation are all very different and experienced in a different way than neurotypicals. Autistic individuals are stereotyped as "picky eaters" because it's common for them to have very specific "safe foods" and/or not enjoy very many exotic or strong flavours. Beel definitely does not have a problem with this, lmao. And we know that his love/obsession with all foods isn't something that came about just when he was made the Avatar of Gluttony, since he was a big food lover as an angel as well (though his eating habits, admittedly, weren't as extreme back then.) Interestingly, a lot of research shows that people with autism are more likely to struggle with binge eating disorder, which has some intriguing implications for Beelzebub 👀

It's entirely possible that exercise & working out and/or sports like Fangol could be special interests for him as well! Correct me if I'm wrong, but I believe that Beel has mentioned or alluded to feeling restless if he doesn't get at least one workout in every day, like he doesn't feel that his day is "complete" if he hasn't done his exercise routines. This could suggest that he experiences the common autism symptoms around adherence to routines and inflexibility when it comes to changing up his usual habits and activities 🤔

This reply has actually become pretty long, so I'll just stop myself here before I get carried away even further 😅

Overall, I think that there's definitely merit to autistic! Beel HCs, and I'm sure that people who are actually autistic and/or are big fans of Beel himself (and who would have read far more of his in-game content than I have, like his Devilgrams) would be able to go into even more detail than I have!

[alaskan-wallflower]

HI… sodapop hcs pls.. especially about him being neurodivergent .. i know him being adhd is popular but i also hc him having autism too (or maybe just all the curtis brothers being neurodivergent cause i hc them all to have a variation of neuron divergence 😭😭)

Oh my gosh absolutely!

Not gonna lie I haven’t seen many people headcanons him as ADHD! So I’ll go with that first

He is definitely undiagnosed and doesn’t get a diagnosis until he’s WELL into his adulthood

He had major impulse issues as a kid-like he would try to roughhouse with Pony when he was a baby or when Pong would try to walk for the first time Soda would just push him down

The Curtis’s parents tried their best. If we’re talking 1960s they just figured he was an impulsive kid and he’d grow out of it

He acted out at school and definitely got more than a few phone calls home and calls asking his parents to come in to talk about his behavior (mainly just not listening and sometimes being too rough and impulsive when it came to playing)

He had it rough in middle school though.

Darry was the school star so the teachers automatically wanted a carbon copy of Darry

Whennthey got Soda though, who goofed off in class and didn’t pay attention they just assumed he was stupid and would often ask him why he “wasn’t more like Darry” and “why can Darry control himself and you can’t?”

After a while that just started to hurt and he definitely had many breakdowns over not feeling good enough.

He just started thinking he was stupid because he couldn’t sit still or find the motivation for anything besides cars

Mechanics are a special interest of his. He knows everything about how cars work. He used to fix cars with his dad and Soda knew all the parts and what did what but he could never do something people thought was “easy”

like math

He kind of just started believing eh was stupid and that’s why he dropped out

He cannot sit still. He’s always either fidgeting or bouncing his legs or straight up just wandering around the DX

His brothers try to wear him out before bed because they think he’ll get better sleep like that

I know autism and ADHD go hand in hand often so I can kinda see it

When he was little he would have meltdowns because he was forced to sit still a lot. Teachers often just thought he was throwing a tantrum but he wasn’t

Horses were a special interest of his for a while too. He loved horses and he knew every kind and a bunch of facts. Get him talking about heosss and he won’t shut up. I’m convinced he helped name Ponyboy what he’s named.

He has stims-mostly just knocking his knuckles on the table when he’s annoyed or kinda making this whining sound when he’s happy (idk how to describe it)

Honestky I can’t really see the autism part-i mean i can kinda see it but i honestly just see him as ADHD, but i did try haha

I hope that’s good!!

[astranite]

Neurodivergent Tracies Headcanons!!

I've been thinking about this for ages (pretty much ever since Ive been into Thunderbirds) and lately seen and had more discussions with people, so I've decided to finally make this post! And hoping it might spark even more discussions! Also given how many Thunderfam members including myself are neurodivergent, and how positive I have seen the fandom be towards it :)

I'll elaborate later, at some point, about why I think these and specificities. Because I have many thoughts. Too many thoughts for right now!

I also decided to include stuff as well as autism/adhd, because neurodivergence has so many things to it.

Scott: ADHD, C-PTSD.

John: Autism, anxiety.

Virgil: Autism, depression.

Gordon: ADHD, autism, PTSD (hydrofoil accident and medical).

Alan: ADHD.

I also reckon Brains is autistic. I don't feel like I know Kayo well enough yet to have any headcanons in particular, but I wouldn't say she's not neurodivergent. Same with Penny. I also headcanon Grandma, Jeff, and also Lee as having ADHD. And I write Lucy as autistic but that is very because I said so and I want to.

So, thoughts? Headcanons? Neurodivergent Tracies stuff you want to see more of?

[arecaceae175]

So I know your autistic Wild (my beloved) has Brenda and Brenda the second for soft friends, does he have any other soft friends?

Do you have any autistic or other neruodivergent head canons for the other Links? (Even if it's just what kinds of things you think they might have for special interests)

OOOOOO wonderful questions!!!!! Authenticity Wild my beloved

He has SO MANY soft friends. I also imagine Flora has a lot too, especially ones with scented things inside- they help her feel grounded when she dissociates or is remembering things related to the Calamity. Their beds in their house (separate beds in the same room on the loft) and their couch are just filled with soft friends. None are as special as the Brenda’s, of course.

I think each culture throughout Hyrule would have a different kind of most common toy and most common stuffed toy. Once everyone figured out how much Wild loves soft friends, they always gifted him one when he helped out the town. Wild loves this so much. The first time it happened he cried from overwhelming emotions of happy and grateful and feeling loved and appreciated.

Other link stuff below :D

I definitely like to imagine all of the Links as neurodivergent. When I have them rotating in my head I like to give them different diagnoses to ✨spice things up✨ and get more diversity in there. Here are the ones I usually give to each Link:

Sky: autism, dyspraxia, dysgraphia, dyslexia

^there is a series I follow of Sky with epilepsy, and I also really love that headcanon

Time: autism, Tourette’s syndrome

Twilight: depression and anxiety disorders

Wind: Down syndrome

Alternatively for Wind: FASD

Wild: autism

Hyrule: ADHD, CPTSD

Four: synesthesia, OCD, sometimes DID

Legend: borderline personality disorder

Warriors: PTSD, anxiety disorder

When I have them as all autistic, here are what I imagine their special interests are:

Time: masks (as a child, not so much anymore), cows, had memorized every dad joke to ever exist

Sky: bugs and birds :). In Skyloft birds was mainly just Loftwings, but then when he discovered all the birds on the surface it became all birds. He single-handedly catalogues and describes all the surface birds.

Warriors: battle strategizing, sewing

Wind: sailing, pirates, also characters from a storybook his Grandma used to read to him and Ayrll every single night (at Wind's insistence)

Wild: cooking, horses, cataloguing plants in the sheikah slate

Legend: magical items, jewelry (jewelry with magical properties are the COOLEST SHIT)

Hyrule: biology/anatomy, and there's a series of books they once found in an abandoned town that they LOVE. Books are hard to come by in their era so those are their absolute most prized possession

Twilight: goats, wolves. He knows every. Single. Fact.

Four: clocks, tools. Four wants collect every tool in existence, and wants to know exactly what it does. Especially blacksmithing tools, bc Four also really likes blacksmithing

[1863-project]

One of the reasons I really don’t engage much with fandom spaces at all these days is just how much casual ableism there is in fandom spaces, a lot of which is internalized ableism. And unfortunately, when you try to explain this to people, they often don’t want to hear it or accept that the ideas they’ve latched onto are actually often pretty harmful to people in the real world.

An example, one of many: people have had theories on N being a Zoroark since Black and White first came out in 2010. That was ableist then, and it’s ableist now - the changeling myth is thought to be rooted in children turning out to be neurodivergent (especially autistic), and if you’re looking at a human character that feels neurodivergent-coded and going “What if they’re not human?” it’s...well, neurodivergent people are already dehumanized in the real world. We’re so often treated as less than human that having a character who comes across as neurodivergent suddenly being not human can feel like a slap in the face to our own humanity.

(Ironically, neurodivergent people often found representation in non-human characters before human characters with neurodivergent traits started popping up in media - this goes back at least to the half-human, half-Vulcan Spock in Star Trek, and possibly far, far further. But that’s a topic for another time.)

Every time I see a character who feels pretty damn neurodivergent, I also see a wide chunk of the fandom interpret their neurodivergent traits really negatively, and it hurts. I don’t engage with the Submas fandom anymore outside of answering people’s train questions that they bring to me because enough people in said fandom looked at Emmet, a character who is more like me than any other fictional character I’ve ever seen in my life, and decided he was scary and unhinged, creepy because of the way he talks when he isn’t close to someone, potentially violent because of his intensity. He’s none of these things, he’s just one of the most autistic characters to ever be written. But the damage was done, because when I saw people treating a character just like me like that...well, it basically told me how they saw me, too.

I graduated high school way, way back in 2007. Some of the people on this website now weren’t alive back then. I wouldn’t get my autism diagnosis for two more years, and all I knew was that I was somehow different from the kids around me, and so many of them had bullied me for this. I was treated horribly because I was intense about my interests, talked differently, walked differently, and acted differently from them. It more or less went on for my entire time in school before I got to undergrad. That shit stays with you. I had this notion that this was how everyone saw me, and that still sits in the back of my mind in my 30s. It’s actually one of the things that prevents me from trying dating, because my bullies were primarily my male peers growing up. It was so important for me to see Ingo and Emmet being themselves and being accepted as themselves, because it meant that maybe people could accept me, too. Except then PLA dropped, and a bunch of new people came rushing in...and enough of them reacted in ways similar to how my bullies did when I was younger, so I had to disengage because it hurt too much.

And the cycle continues with every new character that takes the stage. Nemona debuted in Scarlet and Violet, and once you get more of her backstory in the later game and eventually the postgame you realize she sounds like a neurodivergent person surrounded by neurotypicals. I’ve seen headcanons of autism, ADHD, and a few other neurodivergencies, all of which were definitely people relating to her experiences with their own - Geeta even introduces the “weird girl” to the “new kid” at the beginning of the game in the hopes that she’ll make a friend, a common experience for neurodivergent kids growing up. But then I started seeing people calling her a yandere, and they weren’t joking, and I knew that people who related to Nemona who saw that were going to feel hurt the way I did with people taking Emmet’s autistic traits so negatively.

Fandom spaces tend to be online bubbles, so to speak, and people don’t often realize the impact that these attitudes have in the real world. It’s important for people to have representation and see themselves in the media they interact with, because that’s extremely affirming and validating. Seeing a fictional character just like you being accepted for who they are goes a long, long way when you’re being bullied for who you are in your real life. When you see a bunch of people looking at those harmless traits of yours that people bully you for and interpret them in ways that portray you as scary, creepy, or even unhinged and dangerous...it does damage.

I think about people with psychosis. I think about how media has portrayed them throughout the ages, and how stigmatized they are as a result. I think about people with personality disorders, about people with OCD (of which I’m one myself), about autistic people and ADHD people and people with Tourette’s and other tic disorders, about plural people/systems...the list can go on, and on, and on, and this post doesn’t even touch upon physical disabilities and how ableist fandom spaces can be to them, too (cons being physically difficult to navigate are just one challenge of many they face). I think about how desperate we’ve all been to see ourselves as characters - nuanced characters that feel like real people, not caricatures. The days of the “evil, unhinged schizophrenic” need to be over. We know people with disabilities and mental illnesses are more likely to be victims of violence than perpetrators; we have so many studies affirming this. And yet the rest of the world is taking a long time to catch up on this.

Sometimes, you’re 12 years old and you make an edgy OC who wears a straitjacket because they like to stab people, and then you get a little older and you realize that was pretty ableist and you grow and change as a person. That’s normal - you’re learning about the world around you and learning how to be more kind. But if someone who’s out there in the real world explains why something is ableist towards their disability or mental illness, and they provide examples, that’s not the moment you double down and act like you can do no wrong and that everything you’ve written is fine. It’s supposed to be a learning moment for you, a chance to step back and try to do better. And this especially applies to internalized ableism - like I said, so many fandom spaces are heavily neurodivergent, and the internalized ableism I’ve encountered in fandom spaces has grown substantially with the rise of social media. Sometimes the call is coming from inside the house, and we need to be mindful of how we’re portraying people like ourselves, too.

I think it’s a good idea to really try to be aware as we engage with others in fandom spaces and try not to perpetrate harmful stereotypes or portrayals, and becoming more thoughtful and nuanced about how we depict characters is a big part of that. If you’re writing something edgy just for yourself, that’s for you, and you don’t really have to think too hard about it. But if you’re sharing it in a public space, remember that anyone can encounter it, and it might do damage you’re not really thinking about. It’s important to remember that the internet is a public space, too, just like the places we go in real life, and that we should carry ourselves the way we would if we were interacting in person - we need to try to be respectful, and accept feedback and improve things when we accidentally aren’t.

As an extra reminder, here’s a great graphic from Sonny Jane Wise on Instagram that shows just how many things fit under the neurodivergent umbrella:

Please do your best to do no harm, but if you accidentally do, please listen to the people who are being harmed and want to help you do better.