#though I am also allowed to state my opinions and how I think a lot of y’all just want to blame one character for the actions of another

[scuorge10]

Y’all can like Eurylochus without dragging Polites down by the way, in case y’all need a reminder.

I genuinely don’t understand why a lot of y’all are dead set on dragging Polites through the mud just to try and make Eurylochus look like a better character. Just say that you like Eurylochus’ character better and that you wish he was appreciated more by the fandom as a whole.

[dipperdesperado]

Radicalism 100: Get Started from 0 or, How the Hell Do I Get into Organizing as a Newbie?

I spend a lot of time talking about social change stuff. I feel like a lot of it might not be accessible unless you’re already one who sees yourself as a changemaker. Let’s change that. Let’s talk about how to prefigure the world you want to see, even if you don’t have any experience.

Before I do that though, I want to do some quick framing. I am coming from the place of someone who has some relatively specific foundational values that I prioritize and act from. I believe in horizontalism, mutual aid, solidarity, autonomy, joy, love, and transformative justice. I don’t brandish human nature as a weapon against better futures. If you have a view of people and or society that is purely of negation, then we probably won’t see eye-to-eye. If you think that domination and bootlicking is also necessary, then we definitely won’t see eye-to-eye. Hopefully, you’re curious or open to working towards egalitarian goals through egalitarian means. If you are, this might be useful to you.

How Social Change Happens

There is a lot of talk about social change and a lot of different opinions on how that change occurs. A useful framework to work from is one that imma remix from Joanna Macy.

Harm Reduction and Stalling → This is where giving, charity, and advocacy work live. Think of the survival programs that the Black Panthers did. These are good things, and they provide immediate benefits to folks. However, it’s not radical, as far as the meaning of the word goes. So, it’s great (and necessary!) to organize a mutual aid group that does food distro. What that doesn’t do is address why your group has to do that in the first place. This is something that ideally allows you to survive as you prepare to make bigger changes.

Systems change and Social Revolution → This is where the good shit happens. It is understanding the terrain you fight upon, what you’re fighting against, and finding the weak points to create and widen spaces of autonomy and liberation. This is where we decide how we act within the systems, how we change those systems through collective action, and how we build counter-systems to delegitimize the oppressive ones.

Rebuilding Mental Models → To create a new world, we have to become different people. I don’t mean that in an inactive way—through the practice of harm reduction and fighting the system, we realize our own power and become more capable of creating the world that we want. As we reconnect with reality, and illegitimate the current hegemony, we become more able to see the path ahead. The great and terrible thing is that we have to walk that path.

These are the three buckets that encompass our work ahead. Maybe a better way to think of them would not be as distinct buckets, but as spaces or zones of activity with permeable edges, where specific actions are occupying multiple buckets at a time, and where we travel from zone to zone, bringing information from previous legs of the journey. Stated differently, doing harm reduction might lead you to changing your mental models which might lead you to working towards systems change which might change your mental models which might improve your harm reduction efforts and so on and so on.

With that (admittedly open-ended) theory of change established, let’s get into some practical things you can do to get started. Again, this is built for if you’re not sure of where to begin. This will, hopefully, allow you to get started from 0 (which in my mind is you saying something to the effect of “damn, I know the world is cooked. What the hell do I do?”). Maybe you’ve heard people answer that inquiry with “Organize!”, which isn’t very useful. So let’s talk about that: how to start organizing and be successful when you don’t have the background or confidence yet.

Step 0: Read!

I am a big proponent of praxis (practice informed by theory) over theory or practice alone. Just reading doesn’t change the world, and just doing stuff may lead to some happy accidents. If you have to pick one, do stuff, I guess? But, we don’t have to do that. We can read, do stuff, review the successes and failures, and repeat. In order to not trap you in one mode or another, I’ve recommended a couple of things that should give you a good foundation for more readings and more actions.

Why We Should Democratize Everything

Radical Municipalism | The Anarchist Library

Modules - Economics for Emancipation (economics4emancipation.net)

Once you read these, you’ll be able to know that the world can look different than it does right now, and that there are tangible things that you can do to make that happen.

Step 1: Figure out Your Interest(s)

The next move is to understand what you’re interested in. It can be easy to feel like you have to participate in a certain kind of fight… but the reality is that if you pick an area that you already have an affinity for, you’ll be able to engage with it more sustainably. And hopefully, if you get some wins, you’ll be able to engage and support other important sites of struggle. For me, broadly speaking, my goal is to create solarpunk autonomous zones IRL, in the heart of the empire (the so-called United States). For my interests, the main areas of affinity + need within the solarpunk umbrella are:

Building Intentional Communities (like communes and ecovillages and shit)

Radical Urbanism (Tactical Urbanist projects, Tenants organizing, occupations)

Creative Care and Joy (Mutual aid, herbalism, medicine, etc)

Community Resiliency Training (CERT, Self-defense, Wildtending, Urban Foraging)

If that seems broad, blame it on the ADHD. I put time into each of these areas to try and build towards my solarpunk goals at the local level. You don’t have to be as eclectic as I am, but think about the things that get you excited, and go after those things.

Step 2: Get a Lay of the Land (find folks and people who are doing the cool stuff)

Once you’ve searched your soul and excavated some insight, you can begin your fun. Try and find people in your area who are into the stuff you’re into. If you like the idea of mutual aid, find a local food not bombs chapter (and encourage them to work towards system change!). If you like environmental stuff, look for groups that you feel like embodying the values you're developing. Some good ways to do this are:

Finding social medias. I like to find the most popular version for the thing I’m trying to do and excavate other groups from that. For example, I do some organizing work with an Indigenous education group here, and since it’s a tight-knit organizing community, I can use their IG to find other orgs. This also works well for in-person stuff.

Pull up to events. Try to show up to marches, protests (if you’re ready), and popular education events and look for folks representing the ideas you’re interested in. Folks tend to have flags, pins, and outfits at those sorts of things that let you know where they stand. I’d specifically look for Libertarian Socialist groups, Anarchist groups, and communalist groups. I’d also look into solidarity networks.

Step 3: Start working with folks!

Once you find some folks, start working with them if you like the vibe! You’d be surprised at how much you can learn. I moved about a year ago, and I learned so much by diving into the organizing community. Imma be moving again, and now I can carry those learnings forward into my new communities. Ideally, you’re getting involved in actions, doing study groups, and growing your confidence.

Step 4: Do an analysis of your place!

As you get more comfortable and you start to understand where you’re at, you can start working more intentionally toward system change. This is something that folks don’t do nearly enough, but if you can pull it off well, it’ll be well worth the time. The goal is to understand the challenges and opportunities present in your place. This is very much a whole area to explore, but you can start by looking into Asset-based community development and Community-based participatory research to create a guide of sorts for your community to follow. This is an area that I’m currently working on, and it helps contextualize your actions.

Step 5: Dive deep!

At this point, you might be ready for bigger actions or more capacity building. You might even be ready to steward a campaign. Just know, this is work that doesn’t really have an end; we can always strive for more. If you take nothing else away, know these two things:

Everyone has the capability to steward in a new future.

Surround yourself with genuine community to keep you going.

If you can approach this work with confidence and community, you’ll be able to weather any storm.

[jazeswhbhaven]

From what I've been seeing it feels like PB is focusing on quantity over quality. Things like Obey Me, TWST, and Nu-Carnival has a sizeable group of characters, but they're not too huge so it allows them to flesh each one out to a certain extent, but then they can introduce a diverse set of cards on each of them so you're not starving too much.

WHB has not only has 6 Kings and one more on the way, but they also keep introducing more nobles and angels. In a way it's not bad, but this is why I seriously feel it is a case of quantity and not enough quality. From what I've seen in this community, characters that have been in the game since Day 1 are being super neglected. Then we a have every new L card released being paywalled, nightmare passes that also have the top rewards paywalled, are more frequent, even this time around the S+ card requires more gold keys and it doesn't have anything remotely special about it whereas the last S+ did which was extremely exclusive only. Honestly it's...really sad. Now you don't NEED these cards and I'm not asking for freebies, but in the end they are asking for your life savings for even just the decent stuff, and then you still have to deal with the gacha to do that.

I personally need a decent amount of characterization to really appreciate a character so I do appreciate the world building but no character has stuck with me yet. So everytime a new one is released I go: "Okay but what about like...the existing ones?" Our last one was Leraye, which I'm sorry, it's just a reskinned of his OG card and I found that really scummy which was probably why he was locked through achievements which...was the saving grace still it was the only time it happened. The story was nice though.

I don't want to come off as ungrateful and I probably am, but I just don't understand PB's decisions on what they're doing anymore. We can't use the "they're a small company" card, I'm sure they're not the only small company, but I don't have any sources, but so far this is the first time I seen company really just throw their community into a blender like this...then again I only played like 3 other gachas which isn't a lot.

💭

hey there 💭 anon!

This observation came right in time with how I'd like to pretty much introduce the game to new players that are flocking in.

PB's decisions as of late to change how we get currencies, paid banners, and the progression of the main story and character building has been a damn journey.

I don't think you're ungrateful, I wouldn't call anyone that honestly because as the consumer YOU are the the one, p2p or f2p, in the end that has be entertained by this nsfw game. The only one in existence that is catered to both women and men audiences. With that in mind, you'd expect to see something worth buying/taking up nearly 8gb of space on your phone for.

When the game was first teased, me and my friend were talking about it and she was overwhelmed by the amount of characters they kept showing, I met her through the Obey Me fandom, so that was our bread and butter for the majority of conversations. When I moved on to WHB, she didn't come with, she stayed for like maybe a week or two and dropped it. I forget mostly why which I could ask her again on her opinion.

But I'll let you in on something I saw the other day, the community over in LaDS has been having some issues with their banners/other gacha related things as well stating that this recent banner is driving players away. I don't play LaDS but PB isn't the only company it seems starting to switch things up when it comes to decisions.

The S+ cards confuse me because what they introduced was hey here's beach Rara (Raphael) and he has an adore mode, a story with mild spice, and you chats/more lore about this bitey boi. I had so much fun reading through that. Amy and Sitri's all we get are the likability things and well from the previous expectation? That made me shake my head. (also for the extra gold keys thing, apparently it's only that high if you want to get it early, the card is going into the banner immediately after the event so in theory we all literally could have waited to pull them so we wouldn't have to spend that amount of gold keys)

As far as content goes, I think ultimately there's too many characters to work with. If anyone on the staff has a brain like me, it would be very easy to neglect characters here and there. I also do not like that Gehenna has yet ANOTHER noble (sorry Amy) but other countries are lackin'.

Also unrelated...WHERE IS GEHENNA'S GROUP PHOTO U G H.

Niflheim needs one too.

All in all I hear you. Chapter 6 and Mammons/Amy's events though have me believing that the best has yet to come, these banners though....we will see... Maybe things will pop off when Asmodeus debuts..

[formulatrash]

All this discussion around the most recent fia statement (RE: booing) is making me think about some stuff, so I'd like to know your opinion:

Do you think there's an ~ethical~ way of sympathizing with Verstappen? Even though I don't root for him I've allowed myself to like him quite a lot as of late, but the current state of the world is making me reconsider more harshly his (unaddressed?) past actions regarding racism, which I've always thought of as another case of White indiference rather than active racism. I'm POC myself but I live in a mostly POC country and I worry that that might make me more "forgiving" when it comes to cases that might require certain nuance, especially in the West (I'm certain it does).

It's not like I expect the drivers to be role models, obviously, but I don't know... What do you think?

at the end of the day, it comes down to how you engage with it I think? like idk, I am old and I do think this is some sort of relatively recent polarising thing where anything you can like must be unconditionally good and anything where there's a reason to dislike must be irredeemably bad and that's just not how things work.

everything is nuanced and it's just deciding what the nuance you want to have about it is. sometimes that's "this car man is funny in the Red Bull podcasts with Alex and I don't want to know anything more than that."

sometimes it's that everyone is a complicated, real person and that someone's public persona may not be a reflection of who they actually are - although is a choice that they make to project. or like, idk, people are really into the idea of him shagging Charles, which he presumably isn't but if that's what people enjoy then fair enough - it's just another fictionalised version of someone none of us actually know.

blorbos aren't really praxis. if you want to go out and make a difference in the world it won't be by picking a favourite F1 driver. and sometimes enjoying the annoying white man despite the fact you suspect he might not want you to or especially in your particular fandom ways is an important act of subversion. rpf was, historically, used as a tool of revolution against god-kings.

like, there probably is an engaged and aware way to be a fan of serial killers. I don't know what it is and I'm not particularly keen to use my three braincells on trying to work it out but it's probably out there.

my own thoughts about Verstappen is that he is a complex figure in the broader context of F1; there is a story not particularly about who he is but the way that the sport is still bloodthirsty for suffering and pats itself on the back for cruelty. it shows in the history of what has happened to him, especially when he was still a teenager and in the way that he is praised as a particular type of ruthless in the present day.

does that say anything particular about Max himself? no not really, he's simply the object in all of that. if you can put him in a different narrative then he means whatever you want him to.

which isn't saying like, it's all relative and there's no reason objecting to stuff. I think it's really fucking important to object to stuff and to call them out when they're wrong. but I also don't think there's any need to call yourself out for thinking Max is funny sometimes because other white men are problematic about him.

[justkidneying]

Why some crossbreeds work and some don't

We can breed two types of dogs together (same species), or a donkey and horse together (same genus), but you can't breed a cat and dog together (fucking obviously). But why? And why do we even want to crossbreed things in the first place?

As for the why, that's simple: hybrid vigor. Also known as heterosis, hybrid vigor is the idea that crossbreeds have better fitness (ability to survive and reproduce) than their pure bred parents. Mostly, this term is used in agriculture and animal husbandry, but I think it leads the way for an interesting discussion (and we're definitely going to get weird in this one ;)). Sometimes though, crossbreeds are shittier at certain things. Think about a camel x llama mix. They wanted it to have the six of a camel but the hair of a llama. As far as I am aware, this program was not very successful.

Genetic Basics

For every gene, you have two copies. Each of these alleles is a bit different. Some are dominant and are expressed in the phenotype (the observable characteristics of an organism), while others are recessive (but they can still be passed on). There are other types of gene expression, but I won't go into them here. One hypothesis on why hybridizing an organism gives it better fitness is due to these dominant alleles. The theory states that as a population becomes more related, more of the recessive traits are allowed to be expressed. When you introduce a new genome with dominant alleles, you can overcome the shitty recessive ones.

Crossbreeding corn and shit is really cool and interesting, but I'm not a plant scientist so I'm not going to talk about it. We're going to talk about animals instead. So crossbreeding is mostly between things that are the same species, so think of Goldendoodles and Texas Heelers. There isn't a lot of research actually showing that mutts are inherently more fit than their parents. The main thing you can overcome is inbreeding depression (like how bulldogs don't live that long). Most traits associated with inbreeding are from recessive alleles. But sometimes you actually want to inbreed if you're looking for a specific trait (like a bloodhound's nose).

Crossbreeds that Work

Now onto some more fun stuff (in my opinion). The number of chromosomes and the relation of two species will let us know if they can crossbreed. I'll give some animals and their number will be their number of chromosomes.

Dog (78) + Wolf (78) = Wolfdog (78)

Bos tarus [cow] (60) + American Bison (60) = Beefalo (60)

Horse (64) + Donkey (62) = Mule (63)

Alright, so the first example would create a wolf dog that can reproduce with another canine. They come from the same genus. Same thing with the bovines. Next, we get to the mule. Horses and donkeys are from the same genus, but they have different chromosome numbers. This means that the donkey contributes 31 chromosomes and the horse contributes 32 to the offspring (which is actually either a mule or hinny depending on who tops). The offspring will be sterile due to its shitty code. Mules are way better (imo) than horses or donkeys, and that's why a lot of people prefer them for doing work. However, you cannot say they are more biologically fit, as they cannot reproduce.

So mostly you can see that the crossbreeds are happening in animals that are of the same genus (though you can't always breed two genus members together). You can go less related than that, but I'm not a biologist, so I don't know many examples off the top of my head. One famous one is the marine iguana/land iguana hybrid from two members of the same family (family is a step above genus).

Crossbreeding in Humans

Now, onto humans. We have 46 chromosomes (22 pairs plus two sex chromosomes [X/Y]). We also happen to have our own genus (Homo), and the closest relationship we have is to chimps and bonobos. They both have 48 chromosomes. We share about 96-99% of our genetic code with chimpanzees. The difference here his chromosome number two. This is the chromosome that gives us the difference. Our #2 has the same info as two chromosomes in chimps. Therefore, it's thought that this is due to chromosomal fusion in our evolutionary history.

In saying this, I want you to know that we also share like 85% of DNA with dogs as well, because a lot of DNA is just being alive, having a spine, and being on land. Shit like that. There's not as much difference in animals as people like to believe.

We're gonna get weird now. So, there have been attempts to crossbreed chimps and humans, and they were unsuccessful (they were in the USSR). But if it is entirely out of the realm of possibility? No idea. I argued with some of my classmates about this for a while. There have been bigger jumps in crossbreeding, and I think we won't ever really get an answer to this anyway. I feel gross and I'm going to move on now.

One animal has successfully been hybridized with humans: mice. Transgenic mice have either human DNA inserted in their entire genome, or they may have it only in some cells of the body (chimerism). This is mostly to test disease and stuff, it's not as cool as it sounds, they're mostly just getting them to express things like interleukins. This has sparked debate however, about whether or not this is against nature or whatever. I think it's a dumb argument cause fuck it do whatever you want, but I believe that a lot of this sentiment will stagnate research and advancement in this field, so...

Where is the line between one species and another?

A weird note to end on: HeLa cells. These are a cell line from a woman's cervix (who died in the 1950s) that now have about 76-80 chromosomes. While they can't crossbreed in the normal way, they can fuck up other cell cultures. If another line is contaminated with them, HeLa cells will dominate and their genetic markers will be found in that of the resulting cell line. This made me circle back to the point about transgenic mice. The controversy from politicians was about where you draw the line about what is human and what is not. You can say a mouse with 1% human DNA is not human. But what about a 50% match? What about HeLa cells? Are they no longer human cells, and when would a line have been crossed? Anyways, just some food for thought. Thanks for reading my ramblings.

[skyfallscotland]

Hi!

I am so so sorry people have been so crappy to you. Reading is subjective and you’re allowed to not like the book or have things you don’t like about it. Loving something doesn’t been ignoring it’s flaws. And there’s absolutely room for critique and differing opinions in a fandom while still loving the series.

Haters tend to be very loud but please know there’s lots of us out here who love you and your work and want to hear your voice!! What you have to say is important even if people agree with it

Take the time you need to process everything. 🤍🤍🤍

Thank you 🖤

I think perhaps it's just what my mind is geared to, it's just unfortunate that fandom no longer seems to be a place for that in a lot of cases. I've blocked an ungodly amount of words to try and get no Empyrean content anywhere else, and I'll probably have to do some creative restructuring here too for my own sake, but a lot slips through the cracks.

My therapist did reiterate that for the most part people who are not on either extreme end of the spectrum or who share more realistic ideas about certain texts and how we view them like me, are likely to just be silent.

It makes me feel some kind of way though about the evolution (or degradation) of fandom over the last ten years. There's a post floating around out there that I won't quote word for word (because that would be rude, like them) where people are essentially saying people that view fiction through a critical lens have invaded fandom and ruined it.

I would argue that we were here first, actually. Fandom is built on the backs of people who enjoy a piece of media but want more. People who like it, but would also have liked to see x. People who look at a text and read between the lines to see the possibilities. Fanfiction was never just about regurgitating what was explicitly stated in the text from another person's perspective (not that there's anything wrong with that) or writing missing scenes or romance from other canon pairings. It's always been about the possibilities.

A lot of people have congratulated me in the last few days after reading hold me tight, or don't for seeing Sloane/Dain coming. I did not see Sloane/Dain coming. I wanted it, so I wrote about it. I never thought Rebecca would actually do it (though I'm glad she did).

This is long and rambling, and definitely not what you reached out for. I guess I just find it interesting and a little sad that a lot of people come to fandom for more of 'as close to canon as possible' and refuse to consider what's not explicitly stated. I could name drop another fandom here, but I'm scared of them, so I won't 😂

[linkspooky]

Gojo’s students, and in general Utahime’s students too, despite being Gen Z, they don’t have the mind set of one.

Then again, I am biased since I am an United States American who’s also within Generation Z, so I have a very westernized opinion on this. Gen Z in Japan can may well act very differently from the Gen Z in the USA. I don’t doubt that.

However, one thing I do want to point out is that the jjk younger generation didn’t seem to learn that the system they are in is terrible despite seeing or experiencing how horrible it is.

It could be a cultural thing, since my whole life the system that I lived in have failed me in every stage of my life. So I grew jaded and is critical of the system I’m in. I could see how they never have a change to learn nor see the flaws in the system due to how individualistic Gojo’s students are.

I suppose that’s a benefit with Utahime’s students, most of them are aware how terrible the system is, but all are too weak to do anything about it individuality.

Just some food for thought that I’ve been chewing on.

Okay, no comment on that Gen Z bit, but you're right there is an entire arc in the story dedicated to showing the Kyoto Kids and how they suffer from the injustices in their society. As they have suffered more directly from it, each of the Kyoto Kids is more than well-aware of the flaws in their society.

Each of the Kyoto kids is paired off with a Tokyo Kid and compared to them.

Panda and Mechmaru face off, and Mechamaru's point of jealousy is that he's not allowed to even walk around outside because he's debilitatingly ill due to his heavenly restriction and meanwhile Panda and every other sorcerer can walk in the sunlight free.

If you think about it Mechamaru is one of the children getting exploited, he's literally constantly in bodily pain, and he's still expected to perform as a sorcerer. Whereas, Panda's response is basicaly this: cool motivation bro.

In general, the Tokyo Kids all reply with very self-righteous statements that are technically right, but not too empathic to the person suffering right in front of them.

"Just because someone's been through a lot, doesn't mean they're right" is in fact a true statement, because the Kyoto Kids are lashing out with their emotions, and while their pain is valid emotions aren't objective fact they're just emotions.

However, the caveat of that statement is that suffering can also get you perspective though. People who aren't discrimminated against often don't understand the lives of people who are discrimminated against, because it's not a daily reality for them. It's just logical to not know about something that is not happening to you and you don't have to live with. So, suffering doesn't mean you're right, but it does give you perspective which the Tokyo Kids are sorely lacking.

So yes, Panda's not really obligated to care about Mechamaru's issue or life, but at the same time Gojo is trying to raise students with the purpose of having them correct the injustices of Jujutsu Society... but he's failed in that regard because when confronted with any of that injustice none of them really care.

When Momo tries to inform Nobara about the horrific abuse in the Zen'in Clan that Mai endures, something she's still not free of because unlike Maki she didn't get to leave Nobara's response is once again "I don't care." You have this same stock response that's technically right.

You don't have to pity the unfortunate, you don't owe them anything yes, but Gojo's trying to raise sorcerers that are going to correct Jujutsu Society so that less victims are made, but none of them listen to the victims around them and none of them even seem to grasp there's a problem... unless their name is Maki. Even then her solution to the problem isn't reform it's just destruction.

Kamo brings up clan politics and the pressures he faces as heir to the Kamo, and Megumi straight up says that not only does he not care about the Zen'in, or the Kamo or clan politics at all because it doesn't affect him personally, but he also doesn't care about whether or not he's right or wrong.

Megumi's not obligated to sympathize with Kamo, or even talk to him as they're practically strangers but at the same time how else are they supposed to fix the Jujutsu World if they don't listen to victims and aren't aware of the problems in it?

Which is a big problem in the Jujutsu World itself, because being a sorcerer is such a tough job, most sorcerers just work with their heads down not noticing what's going on around them. The kinds of sorcerers that rise to the top are exactly these people, ones that are either selfish enough to use others to further their advancements, ones who fit the molds of sorcerers a little too well and therefore aren't disadvantaged like a lot of the Kyoto kids, etc. etc.

This is pretty well demonstrated in Shibuya, someone like Nanami who is protective of children and tries to be a responsible adult around them dies because he stayed and fought, while someome like Mei Mei who actively abuses her brother and gets away with it still lives because she ran away.

Because Sorcerer society is such an individualistic society that rewards having your head down and being a cog, and punishes people who go against it by hammering down the nail that sticks out.

In order to overcome that you'd have to learn to think about other people than yourself, and look around you to see what's happening, but that requires thinking for themselves.

Which is Gojo's biggest flaw as a mentor, he's a cog that fits the machine of society so well, he still thinks with the values of sorcerer society. The solution to every problem is just get stronger. Which is why he's raised a bunch of strong sorcerers who fit perfectly into the machine just like he did, but he's failed to raise his children into free thinking adults.

[cowbot-lumberjane]

WOAGH I got tagged by @elliegoose to do a thingy!

now the tag game was to introduce yourself with:

one tv show

one movie

one album

one video game

I, however, liked that they did two and I am ALSO cute and get to do whatever I want so im gonna do two, too.

TV shows: The Venture Bros. and Hilda

talk about opposite ends of the spectrum, eh? Now Venture Bros. will always come with an asterisk, that being that it's an Adult Swim show that was created in the early 2000s by two white guys. Its comedy, especially in earlier seasons, can be unsavory. I'm a big believer in things being imperfect though. Not every show can live up to every standard, and sometimes you just need to roll your eyes at jokes that were made 10-20 years ago. If you can get past that what you get is an excellent and genuinely fun world full of Spyfi and Superhero parodies with a good story to boot.

Hilda, on the other hand, is a show for younger audiences based on a kids book series that largely has to do with various pieces of Scandinavian folklore. I've watched Hilda all the way through twice, once on my own as it was coming out and then once with my wife, and its just so so so lovely. The colour tones of red blue yellow and white, the delightful music, the adorable cast of characters and creatures, its such a good time. One of the best cozy up and just vibe it out shows imo. In my top 5 for sure.

Movies: Everything, Everywhere, All at once and Wolf Children.

What hasn't been said about EEAAO? It won awards that it damn well deserved, its got a perfect cast, it makes me cry every time I watch it. A compelling story about family and change, and the monumental difficulties that can come with them, as well as how different people survive hardships in their life, all wrapped up in the most batshit thing you've ever seen. Clair De Lune, THE SONG I GOT MY NAME FROM, is the main theme and it makes me tear up every time. In every universe, I would love to do laundry and taxes with you, and watch this movie.

Wolf Children isn't far off from that vein. I consider it to be Studio Chizu's magnum opus and I don't say that lightly. From the presentation and voice cast to the music and gorgeous art used in the movie, not even to MENTION how good the story about family, change, growing up, and letting go is, if you don't cry in the first 30 mins you should evaluate your emotional status. This movie means so much to me, its such a gorgeous story, and more people should know about it. Studio Chizu doesn't have a single miss in my opinion, just lesser and greater movies. Wolf Children is hands down the greatest.

Albums: Get Lonely by The Mountain Goats and No Dogs Allowed by Sidney Gish

What??? Clair's top two isn't DnB or something techno related???? Nah dog, I get sad a lot and have a thing for poetry. Get lonely was an album I listened to in some of the worst years of my adult life. I was 20 living with my family who made me miserable in a state that was (and still is) trying to get rid of people like me, and I had very little things that were mine. Walking around downtown Bartow, Florida, in the two weeks of winter that hell state gets while listening to John Darniel sing about soft agonies while watching my breath dissipate into the air? That was mine, and it always will be. TMG in general is I think my favourite band. The poetry on display in every one of their songs is just, too beautiful for my dumb ass to put in any meaningful way.

No Dogs Allowed was an album I listened to while working a midnight shift job I hated while also living with my family. Its an upbeat, quirky, kind of melancholy romp with songs that bring me back to driving from Bartow to Lakeland hoping I could stop myself from either killing myself or fucking up my friendships, whichever came first. Spoiler alert, I'm still alive. It also reminds me of the last big thing I ever did with my sibling before I left Florida for good, which was go to the Tampa Bay Aquarium with them. Several songs from the album were on the playlist I made for us, and hearing them always makes me want to shoot them a message to see if they're doing okay.

Video Games: Night in the woods and Final Fantasy XIV Online

Night in the woods is very, very near and dear to my heart. I honestly don't know what to say. If you've played it you know how good it is. How well written the story of Mae and her mental health crisis is. How it goes over things like poverty and trying to get by/make a better life. Family struggles that they don't talk to you about, small hometown decay that seeps into your every memory until the place you grew up in looks like a collection of distorted rotting shapes. I play it once a year in the fall, and each time I do its like seeing an old friend again. At the end of everything, hold onto everything.

Final Fantasy XIV Online is a game you can play with your friends. I could go on and on and on about how I have 1300 hours in this game and how I met some good friends on it, and how important it is to me as a piece of writing and a community and an experience. But we'd be here all day. FFXIV was there for me in some very tough times. I met new people, I grew distant from others, I have regrets and joys that I still carry with me. If you can get into it with the right people, the game really is something special. Its something to be shared, its a bustling community with all the edges that come with that, its a world where you can be a 7ft. tall elf with green eyes and white hair, and its a part of me.

As for who I wanna tag: @problematicmilf , @ninefoldrin , @baphomets-hairy-bonkhonagahoogs , @mobileleprechaun , and anyone who sees this and wants to do it too. This was fun! Hope I don't seem too lame lol.

[flexbringer]

hey. care to explain how trans women making forcefem jokes made trump win.

yess, thanks for asking. I said "people taking this at face value is the reason trump won", not "trans people making jokes are at fault" i might respond on the original post due to popular demand. its a sensitive and complex topic and I definitely dont intend to offend or be the expert, but to state what ive experienced as someone who likes to mediate. Of course this isnt the only factor of the election but a big one when it comes to the anti-queer backlash we have been wittnessing recently.

The joke you're referring to - i didnt know when I made the comment - was satire of a bad alt-right take, which kind of proves my point.

The gist of it though: I assumed it was a tongue-in-cheek joke, but a lot of people (who aren't familiar with the queer-feminist bubble) don't, and think this is an actual serious stance and it is a point of contention for them, because these are the only types of things that leak from that bubble into theirs, not actual issues. I've heard from a lot of uninvolved people that they think this is what trans activism is actually about and then refuse to look into the topic further because of it.

Phrasings like in this joke literally have been weaponized (thank alex jones et al.) and allow people to believe that according to queerfeminism, "men" are solely defined as irredeemable, patriarchal people who adhere to toxic masculinity, and that men/males who don't display that behaviour aren't actual men anymore but eggs or non-men or whatever (just as the alt-right would). The unclear distinction between gender roles, gender and sex and it's interchangeable use aren't helping at all. Im still not sure how many queer activists on this website actually believe this as well.

Remember, this is the piss on the poor website. How did the saying go about satire being indistinguishable from real opinions these days? Also how easy is it to take an online post out of context?

Never thought I'd be the peetah/nancy under a joke that satirized a bad take, but here I am, since you asked.

In the end my vision and intention is to bring people to be better allies to each other and I am open to criticism, because who am I? Just another person on the internet. The time for community building and making as many friends as possible is now.

Stay strong, stay safe!

[the-ampersand]

About sandbox campaigns

Let me tell you a story.

Last year I went to a big sci-fi/fantasy con in my country. I had been planning to go for years because there is a big emphasis in talks with authors and there were many relating to ttrpg topics. There was one about sandbox campaigns! I was excited!

But sadly, I left many of the talks very disappointed. The one that hurt me the most was, precisely, the one about sandboxes. In it, a national expert in the ttrpg industry explained how there are two (2) kinds of sandbox campaigns, either open world or "social". Maybe three if you also count urban campaigns as sandboxes.

"Ok," I thought "I completely disagree, but let's see where this goes".

Then, the speaker proceeded to explain her prep process. In a social campaign she firts creates the factions. She likes Legend of the Five Rings a lot, so she usually uses the five usual clans of the settings.

"Alright. That's reasonable".

Then, she proceeds to populate their factions with about seven to ten NPCs per faction.

I left at that very instant absolutely astounded.

In my personal opinion, sandbox campaigns don't need to be an exercise of immense prep from the GM. They can be and if it works for some people I am glad for them and I hope they have fun with that prep. But I don't think that's a really reasonable way to manage this kind of campaign for the majority of GMs and even less so for the majority of tables. (And giving a talk about it without properly disclaiming it can set up an impossible standard that might discourage many novice GMs that would consider sandbox campaigns as too labor intensive).

I believe sandbox campaigns should play with the interest of the players. As a GM one should set up an interesting backdrop to explore and interact with, with a varying degree of prep according to one's own interests. And then the players are the ones that will guide the prep needed for the next session by stating their intentions. I have seen several people here clamouring for the many benefits of asking one's players "So what's your plan for the next session, then?". And I think those benefits double when playing a sandbox campaign!

It allows for a true feeling of discovery, not only for the players, but for the GM as well! The GM doesn't need to know everything from the beginning, they can discover it in a fractal way, following the interests of the table (which includes the GM themselves, let's not forget that).

Let me give you an example.

I am currently starting a sandbox campaign based on Skerples' Magical Industrial Revolution. I am mashing it into my DIE campaign, but that's not important. This setting revolves around technology and the grave danger it poses when left unatended to the whims of idealistic inventors and shrewd investors looking to make a fortune. I did as much prep as I wanted:

Being a urban setting, I made small sheets for different neighborhoods and points of interest of the city. I also got the help of my players to do this with a small session of i'm sorry did you say street magic by Caro Asercion.

I set up small scenes to present to the players the different pre-apocalyptic inventions that will destroy the city if left unchecked. (And I added a ninth invention for DIE reasons even though that breaks the number 8 theme in the module)

And that's that! We are already three sessions in and we had an impromptu heist into the university, spent a day selling turnips in the market and met a guy who knows he is inside a narrative (DIE stuff). Next time we are going to attend to a flying machines engineering duel because that's what one of the players asked!

Admittedly, a lot of the prep in this campaign is already done by Skerples, shared with me through the module. But I could have gone with a vibe, a list of cool places to visit, a list of things loosely going on on the setting and a list of names to invoke when a new NPC appears. And you could probably do without any of those things!

What you need to set up a sandbox campaign is not a huge load of prep. Is just enough to present an engaging premise and to answer confidently enough to whatever shenanigans your players throw themselves into.

I have yet to write a single faction sheet. Or a NPC background. I possibly will. But that will be whenever I consider it fun enough.

[outofangband]

Rambling thoughts about the public nature of Aerin’s ordeal in The Children of Húrin versus the private, hidden nature of her ordeal in BoLT and then I started rambling about other things

cw: abuse, forced marriage, etc

Also it’s six am and I got up an hour ago for work so this might not be entirely coherent

in the Narn Aerin’s suffering is public and there’s another element of anguish and shame there.

She is taken as the wife of the incomer who has declared himself lord of Dor-Lómin (though fittingly, poignantly, Brodda himself is the only to declare that there is no lady of Dor-lómin…)

Everyone knows who Brodda is and why he’s chosen Aerin and her position as his wife might be understood to be unwilling by her people and even by his but it’s still understood. then at the same time there are those who call her lucky…that line that she was taken as a wife and not a slave (though let’s be honest…Brodda’s distinction between the two is dubious at BEST, I actually have another post I’m working on about marriage in Tolkien and how his views of it are different…and similar to both other male characters and historical beliefs). Honestly, by “a wife and not a slave” I read that the primary difference is that Aerin is required more to act as though there is a meaningful difference, not that there is one

The nature of forced marriage is such that Aerin is chosen, against her will, to inhabit a role she has not asked for.

It’s not like the others are allowed to express their opinions or discontent but Aerin especially must sit beside Brodda, must act and appear how he wants.

And then as I talked about here there is the inherent trauma of how intimately she must know him, even just in ways to keep herself safe.

Aerin has slightly more mobility and maybe if Brodda is possessive enough or his men think he is then she might be spared the worst of abuse from others though frankly I don’t think he cares all that much and if anything happened, he’d punish Aerin, not whoever hurt her.

From what we get from Sador, her leadership among her people and her using this to feed and shelter some of them is largely unknown to Brodda whether because he doesn’t notice or he doesn’t care. It’s not necessarily something she’s been allowed.

And any ‘privileges’ she has aren’t meaningful. We know she was beaten for giving food to Morwen and that she might be hurt if she was caught talking to travelers. She doesn’t have any real freedom and even if she’s not subjected to manual labor like some of the slaves she’s not living comfortably. (This does not even get into the elements of sexual violence of course, I have another post about those elements here so I won’t go into that now. I think “took by force to be his wife” functions as a euphemism for rape and describes that Aerin is being forced to act in a social and personal role, defined by Brodda and re-enforced by everyone else. Does that make sense?)

We don’t see much of her actual interactions with Brodda but I’m always struck by his anger at Túrin for continuing to push Aerin to speak about Morwen. (Obviously) this is not because Aerin is uncomfortable and afraid, she is uncomfortable and afraid because of him, but because his perception of his ownership of her is so absolute that Túrin “gainsaying” Aerin when she repeats the narrative she thinks Brodda wants is viewed as an insult to him. He’s obviously angry about any of this being brought up, it’s very clear that he views Aerin’s aiding Morwen as another insult, another act of undermining his ownership of her (as I rambled a lot about on this post) and him and Aerin know as well as Túrin that she’s lying…there is no doubt in my mind that she would have been hurt very badly for this afterwards. But also her lie is of the narrative he wants and Túrin challenging it challenges him. Even as her terror is so palpable she is almost invisible in some ways to at least some of those at the table

(It’s also worth noting that Brodda wrongly states that Morwen was his thrall. He’s still very clearly angry that he never had the chance to enact violence against her but that’s for later…trust me I have a post on this too)

Also, was making a darker post about Aerin but while I was writing it I was just thinking about the ways Sador describes her. The almost reverence he has. I think there was some resentment and victim blaming from some of the other captives* I think for the most part people felt compassion for her and even respected her especially when she was able to do more to help the others. That’s what Sador seems to imply. And that’s so important to me!!! Aerin is genuinely loved by her people and they do not blame her for what Brodda does, to her or to them. They don’t seem to expect her to try and temper him. Sador describes Brodda as her husband ‘by need’ but other than that it’s understood that she’s a captive like they are. It sort of goes into my thoughts about Aerin’s kindness as defiance in the face of both personal and cultural violence

Also to be clear, Aerin deserves compassion and respect regardless of her ability to help her people. None of the victim blaming or just generally unfair sentiments she endured is fair. I talked about Aerin’s trying to help her people even at her own cost and their respect for her for this because I think it’s such a compelling and painful aspect of her character and story and I do think that it changed or at least influenced how she was viewed by her people, whether or not that’s fair. but yeah I love and respect Aerin so much I just wanted to be clear that even if there was nothing she could do for them she would still deserve to be viewed with compassion. I think I’ve primarily talked about the conflicts and blame she faced in my post about her extended family and in part of great was the company. It makes me very sad and I find the dynamics of environments of coercive control, whether occupied Hithlum or Angband, interesting to explore

Anyways I will make a follow up post about BoLT and this soon because the similarities and differences are fascinating.

[oftlunarialmoon]

No Expiration Date on Fun!

originally posted to www.onlyfunthings.org on February 22, 2017

Ciao lovelies! Today I have an opinion piece for you about societal expectations, breaking the norm, and having fun!

This post was inspired by many anonymous comments criticizing my hobbies. Their main argument is that I am too old to enjoy things like dolls and Monster High.  So I’m here to explain my opinion on this matter! And, acknowledging that I am putting my opinion on the internet, I know that somehow, some anonymous person will find fault with it. So forewarning, I’m not answering any “trolling” comments, meaning if your only commentary is “lol ur lame for liking dolls” you’ll be respectfully ignored. Let’s get into it!

Part 1- Acknowledging Societal Influences

I’d like to begin by acknowledging the depth of influence that society has on the individual. To understand this, we must understand the different levels of society. Every country is a society, states inside that country are also societies within the main society, then counties and cities, etc, etc.. Where someone comes from will influence what societal norms they were affected by.

A common societal expectation in American society (and the one we’re focusing on in this piece) is the idea of what it means to be an adult, and that adults can’t enjoy “childish” things.

In the earlier days of American society, there were very rigid expectations and ideas on what it meant to be a bonafide adult. But around the 1960’s-1970’s, this rigid construct became a lot more flexible, and as time moved forward, different lifestyles became legitimized for the “American Adult.” Fun became not only allowed, but encouraged, and not just the boring kinds of fun either. The ideas for what was a legitimate recreational pursuit for the American Adult were wildly diverse and interesting.

But even though we have come so far in terms of these ideas, society has still maintained a talon grip on certain biases and ideals for “true adults.” The main  ideal that is still foolishly upheld by society that I want to open dialogue about today is this old-world notion that things marketed towards children can’t be enjoyed by adults.

Part 2- On a Personal Level

To bring things back to the point of the piece, let’s make it personal. I enjoy many “childish” hobbies. I unironically like Monster High, the show, movies, and merchandise. The message behind it is really great; celebrating diversity and being yourself, and being proud of your heritage. 

They even have an episode teaching viewers not to be patronizing towards people with disabilities.

Something like Monster High, with such a good message and great lessons, shouldn’t be limited to children! I think some adults need these lessons too.

Part 3- A Return to Generalization

To continue, let’s return to a general sense. There are many “Children-oriented” things that can be enjoyed by adults. One of these is the hobby of collecting dolls!

Despite how common it is for adults to collect dolls, there is still a social stigma attached to it. Many different media portray adult doll collectors as creepy, mentally unstable, possibly violent or predatory people. Just look at Criminal Minds, where they had an episode where a woman accidentally kills other women trying to make herself new dolls. (Not that I’m saying I dislike Criminal Minds, but they do perpetuate some mental illness and societal stereotypes.)

In reality, adult doll collectors are usually quite normal. Some may collect dolls for photography purposes, some are parents who collect dolls with their children, some repaint the doll’s faces to create beautiful works of art, some may just enjoy dolls.

Similarly, video game use by adults used to be heavily stigmatized, adults who played video games were seen as nerds, shut-ins, or losers: Now, there are many jobs in the video game industry, and a legitimate possibility of success via playing video games on platforms like YouTube or Twitch.

Thinking of changing standards brings me to…

Part 4- Breaking The Norms

To think about breaking a societal norm/expectation scares most people, and for good reasons. Society is very protective of its norms, and has developed methods to protect them, much like a mama bear with her cubs.

But we shouldn’t fear backlash from expressing ourselves! Society is crafted, controlled, and run by those within the society, meaning that WE, you reading this, your friends, your family, me: We have the power to change society, and we should.

What do you all think? Do you agree that adults shouldn’t be stigmatized for liking “childish” things? Do you think hobbies shouldn’t be labelled based on age? Let me know in the comments! I love hearing your opinions, or even if you have other ideas, links, articles, etc!

Thank you for reading!

 I have found that I really enjoy writing opinion pieces. Do you all enjoy reading them? Let me know!

[dearweirdme]

I feel strongly that jikookers must be really young or adults who are really lacking in the common sense and observational department because there's no way there's no way 😭

Imagine fighting tooth and nails and even going as far as visiting cc's anonymously of ppl who don't think the same as you to try to convince them ( more like convince yourself ) that two dudes in the kpop industry who have content after content of very common and usual fanservice, I mean almost kisses with cameras on every angel and on their faces, lots of narratives that come straight out of a company, they even be expecting eagerly their annual compilation of fanservice, the memories ( any rational adult with any idea of how the world works knows that that isn't the way a closeted gay couple would be treated when there's millions of investment in a group), also the body language (jikookers really can't read the most basic body language or they are pretending), the honest clear attraction between two other members etc, are in a relationship

They also be acting like reality is dependant on what ppl's opinion a private relationship is.....it doesn't matter what any of us think, who you try to convince or how much you try to convince yourself, reality won't change, facts won't change, our opinions don't have any influence in these people's feelings and lives, I need ppl to stop thinking with their desires and wishes and really start using their brains.....and I'm not saying this for the need to win any ship war, but bc i see how these delusions serve to harm real queer people and make their lives harder ( kpop and in this case their company has everything to do with this)

Hi @def-sowl!

Yes, absolutely! Going to rant a bit on your ask here.

What I have learned from the Jkkrs visiting my blog and from what I encounter when I look through tags... Jkkrs have a very strong focus on the 'romantic' parts of life. They allow for very little aside that. Everything Jk and Jimin do has a double meaning or they do it with the other in mind. You could so clearly see that when Jk released Seven... his clothes, his pictures, his jewelry, his lives... everything was connected to Jimin. That is not how real lives work. Jkkrs rarely think about reasons for Jk and Jimin's behavior outside the realm of romance. Jimin was unsure about his appearance so he sent Jk a selfie to show why... Jkkrs make it a naked selfie. JImin went to NY... Jkk date. Jimin doesn't talk about Jk on his lives... Jimin isn't ready/holds the ropes/whatever it was. The way they see Jk and Jimin is entirely built around the idea of them together. You can even see huge discrepansies in that, because at the moment they dont know whether to stick with the "Jkk is bold" or the "Jkk is laying low".

When thinking about the members, there's so much to take into account. They do not live normal lives for instance. I had this Jkk go on about Tae not knowing Jk's hotelroom number and how that meant they couldn't possibly be boyfriends. They do not take into account that those guys go from hotelroom to hotelroom at times, with only time to sleep at some days. It's nothing like schoolcamp or going on holiday. We as fans, cannot compare their situation to ours in the practical way. They have jobs that none of us experience, they have more money than us, they always have to be aware of 'image', they are 'being lived' at times... it's just.. we cannot relate. That doesn't mean we cannot incorporate those things when we think about how their lives might be though, and I feel Jkkrs absolutely lack in that regard.

That anon came back and showed me many tiktoks and tweets about how I am wrong and how Jkk is real (though stating they do not mean to try and convince me, they just like pointing out that I am wrong). But those vids, where all either fanservice or plain friendship. And you are right, they do not understand the subtlety of reading bodylanguage at all.

and I'm not saying this for the need to win any ship war, but bc i see how these delusions serve to harm real queer people and make their lives harder ( kpop and in this case their company has everything to do with this)

That is a very strong point you made, and yes I agree.

[anneapocalypse]

4, 8, and 16! 🔥🔥

For the 🔥choose violence 🔥 ask game!

Disclaimer: provocative name aside, I am not actually trying to be mean here, these are just my opinions offered for Entertainment Purposes™️, and I’m not mad at anyone who has a different opinion.

4. what was the last straw that made you finally block that annoying person?

I'm lucky if I remember why I blocked anyone. I just have to assume past!Anne had a reason. 😂

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

Okay, so this one's about Merrill, but before I say it I have to qualify that I am not on the Merrill hate train. I love Merrill, I think she's a great character, and I don't think she's wrong for wanting to restore her people's history. I do think that what she's doing is dangerous enough that it's in conflict with the duties of a Keeper to protect her people--but the thing is Merrill knows that, and that's why she agrees to leave the clan. She believes this is too important, more important than becoming a Keeper, which she also says she would have been terrible at. I do think Merrill is not being totally honest with herself about the danger at first; in Act I, she's very quick to insist that it's fine and she's got everything under control. But I think her years in Kirkwall make her more mindful--she sees a lot of demons, a lot of blood magic, she sees how Anders struggles with Justice, and she almost falls to another Pride demon herself if she goes into the Fade with Hawke. (Personally, I also think this might have something to do with her proximity to Audacity on the mountain, and then having more distance from it in Kirkwall, because I do think the Pride demon was influencing both her and Marethari. In the short story "Merrill" it's very clear that it called out to both of them, rather than Merrill seeking it out on her own.)

By Act III, she's undeniably aware of the danger because she asks Hawke to come along for that very reason. What Merrill is doing is undeniably dangerous, but dangerous does not necessarily mean evil or wrong. In the end, though I think there's undoubtedly some level of pride in her motives still, I do think Merrill is fully aware of the risks, and believes that the possible gain is worth it, and takes every precaution she can.

Furthermore, I think that Marethari fails in her duty to her people when she goes to the demon and allows it to possess her. Her responsibility is to protect the clan. When Merrill leaves, Marethari needs to accept her choice and let her go. She needs to move the clan on, out of reach of whatever danger she believes Merrill poses. If they need to contact another clan, raise new halla, she has years to do that. Instead, she keeps them on Sundermount for the better part of a decade because she (and her own pride) simply can't let it go, and in the end she leaves her clan leaderless and possibly dead because she (and, I think, Audacity) convinces herself that only she is capable of protecting Merrill. But Merrill isn't her responsibility anymore. Her clan is. And she abandons them.

So the one thing that kind of sticks in my craw is the idea that Merrill must be an unparalleled genius because she successfully reverse-engineered an eluvian from a shard. Because the thing is she didn't do that! That's the thing she didn't do! She never successfully got the mirror working in canon. Maybe in the next game, for some world states, we'll find out that she did finish it, or maybe we'll never hear about it again; as of the information we have right now, she never made it work.

And I know this one is contentious, because there's a big interpretive gap as far as how close Merrill was to making the eluvian work. And I'm not trying to step on anyone's headcanons here; there's room for speculation and when it comes to headcanon or fanworks there's truly nothing wrong with going the route that she was really, really close, and maybe succeeded down the road.

But as far as canon, we simply do not know. We do not know how close she was. We do not know whether she had built it correctly and simply needed the power to activate it, or whether there was some fundamental flaw in her theory she hadn't figured out, or whether it was wrong from the ground up. We do not know whether Audacity truly knew what she needed or would have given it to her had Marethari not interfered. We don't even know whether it's possible to build an eluvian in a post-Veil world, for that matter! We don't know, and we probably never will.

In fact, it's unclear to me whether Merrill actually knows the full extent of what eluvians are supposed to do. She says in her Act II quest "Mirror Image" that she knows that they were used for communication over distances (which was the extent of ancient Tevinter's understanding of them, and what Duncan remarks in Origins), but she doesn't know exactly how they work. I don't remember her ever saying that it's supposed to be a physical portal you can travel through. There's a moment where Hawke asks what's wrong with it and Merrill exclaims, frustrated, "Well... look at it! Do you think it's just supposed to sit there not doing anything?" I'm not convinced she actually knows what it's supposed to do, only that it's important to her people's history. I'm not blaming her for her lack of knowledge here--I think as fans we've gotten so used to hearing about eluvians that it's easy to forget their existence isn't common knowledge in-universe even among the Dalish. Ariane's clan was safeguarding an exceptionally rare text about eluvians and even she didn't know what they were (in part because most modern elves canonically are not fluent in ancient Elvish, something else I think people kind of forget).

Again, I don't think Merrill is wrong for wanting to discover and restore her people's history. If anything, the gaps in their knowledge only make that more important. I'm also not saying any of this because I'm trying to refute the idea that Merrill is smart. I think she's very clever and resourceful and I think this shows in a great deal of her dialogue with other characters.

I just don't think we can know, based on canon, that her theories were 100% correct and she is now the foremost expert on eluvians. Again, I have zero issue with this as headcanon--I really am not coming for anyone who holds it as such! My only disagreement is when it's put forth as Fact, and like anyone who takes a different view of canon is wrong and is trying to tear down Merrill.

Because like all my faves in this series, it is possible for a character to be good and compelling and interesting and even right about a lot of things without being right about everything all the time.

16. you can’t understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

Okay we'll take this one for whatever values of "so many people," because at this point I don't really see this one come up all that much, but as a huge Sera fan, I do not understand the appeal of the "Sera is Andruil/has a fragment of Andruil" fan theory, and I don't think I ever will.

For one thing, by the end of Trespasser we know that Solas and Mythal are walking around in the waking world still because they are exceptions. The rest of the Evanuris are not hiding among mortals. We know where the others are! They're in the Fade! Solas trapped them there! That was a pretty significant thing that happened!

For another, Solas and Andruil were not friends. If Sera was or was carrying a piece of Andruil, and Solas recognized her, I think he would have reacted strongly. Maybe he wouldn't be capable of killing her on the spot in his current state, but also I sort of doubt he would be walking around gently prodding her to remember who she is.

The theory also seems to be partially based on the misapprehension that Sera's archery skills are somehow magical, which I've already talked about.

But also, and more importantly to me personally, I feel like it just ruins Sera's character. Sera's story is that of a young adult with a lot of unrecovered childhood trauma, and deep issues with identity, rejection, and abandonment, still trying to find a place where she belongs and discover what she believes about the world. What does her unwittingly carrying around a piece of an elven god add to that? What does it add to her painful memories of Lady Emmald, to her sense of alienation from other city elves? It undermines the perspective she brings to the Inquisition as a commoner, a Nobody who is proud of being nobody. It completely ruins her relationship with Solas, turning them from a fascinating set of foils (the ancient elf who broke the world vs. the modern elf who is in so many ways the product of the world he created) into just two ancients arguing with each other. If anything, it feels like papering over everything that makes her complicated and interesting in an attempt to "fix" her: Look, she is Elfy after all! She's the Elfiest!

Sera doesn't need to be secretly an ancient goddess to be a compelling character.

[sophieinwonderland]

Saying "you're white so therefore you can't have an opinion on transrace (only real POC can)" is disturbingly similar to "you like men so you can't have an opinion on bi lesbians (only real lesbians can)". Like sure, if you claim that only "real" people of color are allowed to have an opinion and define "real" people of color as inherently excluding transrace, then you've created a circular argument of "white transrace people can't defend transrace identities because they're white and therefore can't be transrace and are therefore white and therefore can't defend transrace".

And then they just ignore every POC who disagrees with them, which sure sounds racist to me! (Especially when in every transx community I've been in, the majority of transrace people have been bodily POC)

Never mind too that these are just word for word terf arguments. "Men white people invading women's people of color's spaces because of misogyny racism because sex race is biological and only real women people of color can decide what a woman POC is" and then they're like "It's different!" and you're like "how" and they're like "because it's racist!!" and you're like "okay how" and they're like "because it just is! it's different because I say so as a person of color!!" and then they proceed to ignore people of color saying it's okay.

I also don't think marginalization allows you any significant say whatsoever on different related marginalized identities. Just like transfems are not the authorities on transmasc experiences and disordered/traumagenic systems are not the authorities on nondisordered/endogenic plurality, being cisID for a given marginalized identity doesn't actually give you the right to speak on that transID.)

If it did, cis women would be authorities on all trans experiences and singlets would be authorities on all tulpa/created system experiences (not an exact equivalent, but close, and some tulpa/created systems do consider themselves transplural, which I think is valid).

It's just a clusterfuck all the way down. Also as a disabled person, I strongly suspect that transabled identities in particular could be observed neurologically just like BIID can. I'm leery of doing that for nonmedical identities because of biological essentialism (though I recognize the potential scientific merit in it regardless). Not only that, but I wanna say: why is it ableist to want to be an identity that's not inherently a bad thing?

Why is it ableist to want to have a disability, even one that includes suffering as part of the experience, when it's not bad to BE disabled when you DON'T consent to it? Is being disabled only acceptable to these people because disabled people don't have the option of being abled? Is being abled a better, more desirable state? If disability pride only allowed because you can't help not being abled? Because THAT sounds horribly ableist.

For that matter, this applies to all transx identities!

I have quite literally dozens of disabilities ranging from physical to neurological, just counting overarching diagnoses alone. Counting individual things I struggle with or can't do, it would be hundreds. I WANT to have the disabilities I already have. I'd want most of them if I DIDN'T have them because they are central to who I am and the causal relationship there goes both ways.

I'm literally totally fine with people wanting my disabilities, too. Wanna be autistic? Oh cool, autism can be difficult but it's dear to me in a lot of ways too. Wanna experience psychosis? Hell yeah, I love being psychotic and honestly the only part I struggle much with is the negative symptoms that come with schizophrenia specifically (plus you can literally induce psychosis with drugs, and not always the scarybad kind either). Want to have a histamine disorder? I'll offer mine to you like I keep offering my boobs to my transfem partner, I don't like experiencing it but more power to ya. Want chronic pain? Considering I wouldn't actually get rid of mine because I literally like experiencing pain, I'm right there with you. Want IBS? I mean I don't get it, but sure!

(And yeah "want" vs "feels like they innately have but the body doesn't match" is an imperfect distinction, I'm using want as in "wants the body to align with internal identity" in the same way that trans people sometimes "want" to transition".)

Idk, I've just never seen an argument against transx identities that wasn't recycled terf rhetoric that "is different because it is and I say so!" or actively bigoted itself. The more arguments I heard against transID stuff, the more I was convinced people are just bigoted against a minority group they don't understand because they think their own discomfort is a good indicator of morality.

And ngl! The first time I was referred to as cisx for some of my marginalized identities, I had a visceral emotional reaction! I thought people were essentially saying I had privilege over and oppressed transx people of that identity, because that's how it works with gender.

But... it's not even always that simple with gender (example: white middle class trans woman vs black working class cis man) and also... that's an assumption *I* made and is utterly untrue. It's closer to how trans men can't oppress and don't have privilege over trans women: cis men oppress cis women, but all trans people are marginalized.

Once I worked through that, I was able to see that transx people were some of the most supportive, inclusive, safe people I'd ever met. I literally feel safer in transx spaces about my cisx marginalized identities than I do in many cisx spaces for those identities. I feel safer as a queer plural disabled person in transx spaces than I do in queer, plural, and disabled spaces! In part because they do not allow any form of bigotry (unlike say, ableist queer spaces or pluralmisic disabled spaces) but mostly just because... they're unconditionally accepting of identity and only judge people based on whether or not their actions are bigoted.

I wish we had more spaces that recognized that any innate and honest identity (so not like "haha attack helicopter gender" as a joke that someone doesn't actually ID as) is good faith and is not harmful, because identities are thought-based and thoughtcrimes aren't real. Idk.

Thank you for adding your experiences.

My own views on transIDs are complicated and I don't agree with everything here, but I am glad you found a community you feel safe in. I do agree that a lot of the anti-transX talking points sound exactly like TERF talking points, and in the case of anti-trace arguments, often the way they try to claim it's different is appealing to racial realism.

And like you, I strongly suspect that mental transability is something that could be observable in the brain like BIID.

There are a couple thing you mention that I really want to talk about as they've bothered me for a while with this whole debate.

Saying "you're white so therefore you can't have an opinion on transrace (only real POC can)" is disturbingly similar to "you like men so you can't have an opinion on bi lesbians (only real lesbians can)"

It's not even just not having an opinion. It's about having the wrong opinion. I've personally gotten a ton of hate for saying I'm largely neutral on the subject. I don't identify by transIDs, but have talked to people in the community and believe they're good faith identities.

In contrast, people wouldn't say "you can't have an opinion" if your opinion agrees with them.

And then they just ignore every POC who disagrees with them, which sure sounds racist to me! (Especially when in every transx community I've been in, the majority of transrace people have been bodily POC)

And this is a HUGE issue I have with the anti-transX side.

There's a narrative being spread that Trace individuals are largely white people "pretending" to be PoC.

What I'm largely observing from the TransX community is the opposite. Many of the people who sent asks to me were POC-bodied. There was also a poll of the Trace community showing that a lot of them felt that their identities were a result of racial trauma, or didn't know if it was related to racial trauma (still suggesting they had a history of it.)

To me, the anti-trace rhetoric comes across as lateral aggression being disguised as anti-racism.

You have a group of mostly PoC who are branding another group of mostly PoC-bodied individuals as racists for wanting the right to choose their own identities instead of being defined by their ancestry or skin color.

What's worse though is that they're actively set on bringing white people into the Trace conflict. It's incredibly common to see white people with transX identities in their DNIs, all in the name of being anti-racist... or at least appearing anti-racist in their social circles.

My assessment... as someone who I'll admit is an outside observer to both communities... is that the anti-trace side has been leveraging the concept of white guilt to get white people to join their side in ostracizing and abusing a group made up mostly of PoC-bodied individuals.

Which just seems... super messed up to me...

[mbti-notes]

Anon wrote: INFJ here, 28F but questioning my gender identity. My question and its context is kinda NSFW, but has been bugging me for a long time now.

I believe I’m asexual and recently started wondering if I might be aromantic too. A couple of weeks ago, after a make-out session with a queer platonic partner (45M, romantic and possibly demisexual), I realized that looking at my body in the context of what we’re doing turns me off.

A little history here, I’ve always envisioned myself as a guy in my head growing up; I wanted to get gender affirming surgery at one point; and only recently have become more accepting of my body as something that I need to take care of and sustain, and not be cruel and uncaring towards. I also spend most of my time in my head, so my body has always been a cage of flesh and blood to me.

Another thing that also happened to me before is that after having sex with an ex, I felt like my mind was slowly coming back to my body and wondering if I had been the one doing all of the things that I did. It felt very distant, mechanical, and maybe even disgusting? I—or my brain—seemed very critical of what had happened. It was a consensual affair, but it almost feels like my mind dissociated even though I seemed to be enjoying it in the moment.[end of warning]

I thought that these two occurrences could be due to my inferior Se—the magnitude of external stimuli in the moment that needs to be processed—and my Fe in overdrive—feeling what the other person is feeling, because I feel I am very empathic—when I’m remotely intimate/physical with someone. Do you think that could be the case? Is it possible that these two functions contribute to my asexuality and aromanticism? How about gender identity?

I’m also wondering if maybe it is the self-image that my Ni has of myself and my body that doesn’t align with what my body actually looks like. In which case, I feel it’s closer to dysphoria? Is it something that I can work on by developing myself as a person, like in the dev guide? I feel very lost & confused. I’m trying to take the right steps by checking in with myself, talking to my therapist & my qpp, but I’d appreciate any guidance you could give. Tnx & happy pride! <3

-------------------

Happy pride month! You're bringing up a really, really complex issue. Two issues, actually: gender identity and sexual orientation. The fact is there hasn't been enough research about them, let alone research that would link them to personality type. In a lot of ways, mental health professionals are kind of allowing LGBTQ+ people to set the stage for how best to help and counsel them. While empathy and compassion go a long way to ease the pain of prejudice and discrimination, it's hard to find a therapist who really understands this kind of experience unless they've been through something similar as well.

I mention all of this as a disclaimer because it's important to acknowledge that a lot of what we think we know about gender identity and sexual orientation is very much speculative or merely opinion. Because LGBTQ+ experiences have also been heavily politicized into wedge "issues", it's also important to note that the people who speak the loudest about these issues aren't necessarily the ones you should be trusting.

I will start out by stating the fact that asexuality and transgenderism exist. There are studies that reveal neurological differences between allosexual and asexual people, as well as cisgender and transgender people. For instance, asexual people show less attentional and emotional engagement with sexual imagery.

That being said, I am not aware of any definitive and objective way to verify whether someone is actually asexual, aromantic, or transgender outside of what they believe is true about themselves. There are cases of people who come to believe they are asexual because they're operating on an oversimplified definition of it as "not liking sex", or aromantic as "absence of romantic feelings". That can't be the whole story, because humans are very complicated.

The person may or may not actually be asexual and/or aromantic. When you take into consideration the complexity behind why they dislike sex or have no/muted romantic feelings, it could be something seemingly unrelated to orientation. For example: physical or mental health issues; hormonal or libidinal issues; going through religious or moral education that downplayed romance or demonized sexuality; fear of vulnerability; fear of intimacy; insecure attachment; too many negative romantic/sexual experiences that weren't properly processed; having suffered sexual abuse or trauma; etc.

One way to sidestep the either/or trap is by understanding asexuality and aromanticism as a spectrum, where sex drives fluctuate, romantic attraction and feelings ebb and flow, etc. At this time, we take people at their word when they claim to be asexual and/or aromantic. We treat it as a factual statement about their current attraction patterns, sex drive levels, and relationship preferences. But this isn't very helpful for someone who's really questioning their own existence.

As you alluded to in your case, there is a chance it could be more related to personality development issues than sexual/romantic orientation. IF that's the case, developing your Fe and Se functions would eventually lead you to find meaning in emotional connection with a romantic partner and enjoyment in sexual activity. But the word "IF" is doing a lot of heavy lifting in that sentence.

I'm not a therapist, so I will only speak to type development if you are truly interested in developing Fe+Se and seeing where it takes you. With regard to Ni, a self-image can change and evolve when new experiences allow you to see yourself in a new light. Challenge yourself to build as many strong relationships with people as you can mentally and emotionally manage. It's important that you interact with as wide a variety of people from all walks of life as you can find. This allows you to experience the fullest range of what human relationships can offer you, so it prevents you from drawing bad conclusions from too small a sample of what's actually out there.

In the process of building these strong relationships, you will certainly run into problems. Pause and reflect whenever you meet an issue, difficulty, or conflict in yourself. Inquire into what it really means and what it says about you. Of course, you can ask for help from a therapist about how to interpret your feelings. Use real-world experiences to reveal all the obstacles in your mind that might be preventing you from connecting with people emotionally, romantically, and sexually. If it's possible for you to remove those obstacles, then maybe the issue is more psychological and you are not as asexual or aromantic as you believe you are at the moment, if at all.

To be clear, I'm not advocating for any kind of conversion therapy approach. I'm not saying you have to try to turn yourself allosexual. The main point is that you have to dig really deep into yourself and discover what's really there. As an Fe type, part of that process involves systematic experimentation as a means to learn important truths about yourself -> other people are your mirrors. When Fe is underdeveloped, people don't see themselves clearly and their self-concept can be heavily distorted by unconscious social pressures and expectations. An important aspect of Fe development is becoming fully conscious of social influences, such that you discover the boundary between where you end and others begin. And the most efficient way to learn is through firsthand experience in actual relationships.

With regard to gender identity: Disembodiment is a known defense mechanism, and it's not an uncommon manifestation of inferior Se issues. At the very least, it signals that something's awry when you're using it as an escape. I don't know where you live, but it certainly doesn't help that in Western culture, with its roots in Abrahamic religions and ancient Greek philosophy, there is a rather strong undercurrent of devaluing "earthly" things like the body and viewing the (especially woman's) body as a source of impurity, evil, or imprisonment of the soul. Western culture strangely divides up the mind and body in a way that makes it difficult to feel like a whole and integrated being. This is part of why Westerners get fascinated by Eastern cultures and their more holistic ways of thinking.

If you're serious about exploring gender, then you really have to dig deep into the concepts of masculinity and femininity and everything in between. Gender is largely a social construct but many people don't actually understand the full implications of this claim. Some people think a social construct isn't "real". Some people think a social construct can be easily changed at the snap of a finger. Neither is correct. I'm not going to get into the weeds of gender theory, for that you can consult the recommended books on the resources page. Suffice it to say that one cannot have a proper understanding of one's own gender without considering how the concept of gender is constructed by the society one lives in.

For example: The majority of cultures around the world are patriarchal. If you don't know what that really means, the takeaway point is that femininity has traditionally been underappreciated, even devalued. In a heavily patriarchal society, everyone is socialized to view men as superior and women as inferior in all the domains of life that are considered important to that society. Socializing people like this is about upholding traditional roles and hierarchies from one generation to the next. In the worst cases, women are treated as property or commodities to be used, traded, and abused at will.

Living in a society that devalues your existence, it would make sense that some women would want to disavow femininity or womanhood in order to preserve self-esteem and sanity. After the women's liberation movement of the 1970s, a portion of women understood "feminism" as being equal to men and doing all the things that men do, so they started wearing suits, getting obsessed with careers, and behaving more aggressively. But that was misguided because it meant further uplifting masculine ideals at the expense of the feminine.

As someone born with a female body, viewed as and treated as a woman by the society you live in, it is important for you to go through the process of opening up your mind to exploring and, if necessary, unlearning sexist thinking about what it means to be a "woman". If after having gone through this process of "deprogramming" your social conditioning and releasing yourself from rigid gender stereotypes, you realize that you're comfortable being a woman in a female body, then okay.

However, if you've gone through all that and you are no longer influenced by sexism and you still have no real connection to the concepts of femininity or womanhood, then you can feel more confident in calling yourself something else, something that more accurately captures what you are. You may decide to call yourself man, woman, nonbinary, transgender, androgynous, agender. It's about what fits you best when you think of your gender (or lack thereof). The takeaway point is: You'll only be able to see what you really are when your mind is truly free and clear of all the outside noise that pressures you into being something you're not. This goes back to needing Fe development and being more conscious of your position within society and how it affects you.

Since you're asking for my thoughts, I'll be transparent in offering my personal opinion and you can take it as you will: One of the problems with construing gender and sexual orientation as an "identity" is that it can sometimes become an obstacle on your path to realizing your true self. By putting a label on yourself, you are more likely to feel at peace, discover peers, and feel solidarity with a community - that much is true. But there's also a darker side to it. Sociopolitically, a label means you inhabit a predefined role, you have images and expectations placed upon you by society that you will feel pressured to live up to (due to Ni+Fe), you have a more fixed concept of who you are that could inadvertently cut off your potential for change and growth in meaningful directions. While I understand and support the case for labels and their ability to clarify one's existence, I also believe that labels eventually outlive their usefulness and have to be transcended in order to realize one's full potential as a human being.