#this quote fits them so well I'm in pain

[skaldish]

Alright folks. Here it is, my theory of what Ragnarok actually represents. It is very messy and I'm not sure I'm going to be able to actually convey my understanding clearly like I try with most things, because genuinely this is shit I would write a doctorate-level thesis on.

But we're going to try anyway.

So. After doing a lot to try to replicate animistic thinking, as well as taking a VERY deep read of the Norse myths, my theory is that Ragnarok is specifically allegory for societal collapse—the "end of the world" imagery and such is meant to convey what this feels like.

Recall what Odin says in Grimnismal. It goes something like this, since I can't be arsed to find the exact quote:

Huginn and Muninn fly over the world every day; while I fear Huginn ("thought") may not return, I fear Muninn's ("memory's") absence most.

When a society collapses, so does it's memory. It loses its technology, its methodologies, its paradigms, and everything it has learned about the world up to that point. Gone. Entire chapters of history erased.

What causes societal collapse is not always a conquering force, but is oftentimes the result of circumstances that a society orchestrates for itself. Think Rome.

People who have gone through societal collapse will probably develop an invested interest in figuring out how to prevent it entirely, so they don't have to start society all over again.

It's one thing to preserve the memory of "things collapsed and here's why" using a story. But it's another thing to do what apparently the Norse people did, which is cultivate a methodology for cognitively hardening their own society against collapse, using stories as a way to do it.

Like...I'm not kidding when I say they legitimately knew how the human mind works, and then built an entire system of stories and narratives that intentionally support the mind's freedom, cultivation, and agency. I can only convey a fraction of how this works in this post because the rest requires a deep-dive into behavioral psychology and neurological development.

All the tales leading to Ragnarok demonstrate various instances where the gods choose to follow their own agendas at the expense of the real people and forces in the world. All of these little things contribute to the magnitude of the event that is Ragnarok.

The tales represent these transgressions using allegories rather than literal events. This is because these stories were designed for children, who don't process information through a prefrontal cortex like we do as adults. They don't have them yet. But this gives kids an intuitive understanding for how circumstances of collapse feel, so they can recognize them in all their forms.

Loki is an allegory for the mischief we feel as children, and for the behaviors we demonstrate before we get to the age where we start valuing cooperation. In the myths, every time Loki causes mischief in ways that creates problems, the gods get mad at him and threaten Loki's life until he fixes his mess. Loki eventually becomes vindictive, kills Baldr in a jealous fit, and then is punished by being bound and buried beneath the ground, only to fight against the gods in Ragnarok.

The surface-level takeaway is a lesson in parenting: If we punish kids for their mischief, they're going to become vindictive adults, and these adults are going to have it out for the rest of society because they've been disenfranchised.

But it doesn't just end here. Consider how we punish ourselves for our own sense of mischief, beating ourselves up for having "problematic" thoughts and trying to bind and bury those thoughts in the depths of our mind.

These thoughts come from a place our mind known as the limbic system, which is focused on avoiding pain and seeking pleasure, and—most importantly—does not understand the world or make decisions using logic and reason, but in terms of what feels enjoyable and what doesn't.

We tend to call this system our inner child.

When we punish our inner child, that child starts doing exactly what Loki does and resorts to malicious and petty tricks. We can hold this behavior at bay until something causes us to "snap" (like Jörmungandr's tail does) and out comes the malice of the disenfranchised inner child, which creates a terrible cascade of social consequences for us.

Now, if we were to listen to these stories as kids, we would naturally be very upset whenever Loki was threatened of punished, because we think out of the limbic system at that age and Loki is meant to represent us—specifically, the state of being a kid. We would see what comes to pass, with Loki being imprisoned and fighting the gods against Ragnarok, and it would become clear to us that there's consequences for punishing mischief AND also causing too much of it.

Now I don't know about you, but I was very motivated by a sense of justice as a kid. Hearing Loki's arc would have inspired me to learn how to be friends with my sense of mischief while also learning to use it in ways that were cooperative and social, because this would have been how I could right the wrong I felt was done to Loki. It would also mean my own limbic system will not fight against me in the future, but be a modality of thought I can always access. (This is the beauty of the way the Norse myths are crafted; they are designed to instill knowledge of the world using mechanisms that reinforce one's own sense of agency and competency, so rather than being told the moral of this tale, it sets me up to run right into the conclusion it wants me to draw, but in a way that makes me feel smart and therefore inspires me to value it.)

The binding of Fenrir serves a similar allegory. When we become explosively angry in the way that Fenrir represents, it consumes our wisemind the same way Fenrir consumes Odin during Ragnarok. But this only happens if we bind Fenrir/our anger. By demonizing this nature of ours simply for existing, it will not only refuse to listen to us, but also turn against us. Remember that Fenrir was willing to socialize and cooperate with the gods before his betrayal.

(Honestly, I believe this is why ulfheiðnar existed the way they did. Even though the animalistic rage of ulfheiðnar was too terrible for domestic society, it was not demonized, but instead given a social function. People would learn to understand and partner with their own sense of rage, and I'm guessing this is also how they were able to keep their sense of reason and priorities straight even while going berserk from psychoactives.)

These two examples serve to illustrate how societal collapse stems from binding or punishing our own natures. But also fearing our own nature as mortals factors into it.

For example, Naglfar. This is a ship constructed of dead people's fingernails, and its completion is part of what signals the beginning of Ragnarok. But as the story goes, we can delay Naglfar's construction by trimming the nails of the dead before we bury them.

Naglfar represents "neglect for the dead," and this is significant because the act of no longer viewing the dead as people is sort of like the canary in the coal mine for no longer view each other as people...and no longer seeing people as people is what defines Ragnarok.

A society is at peace when its people have no fear of death, and having no fear of death comes only by incorporating death as a normal and familiar part of life, just like we do with birth. Our relationship with death is a litmus test for our relationship with our own humanity—if we fear the dead and cannot see them as human beings, then we are always going to fear a part of our own humanity, and be at war with it. The simple act of keeping the nails of the dead well-groomed because it stalls Naglfar's construction was a way to remind people why such a simple act was profoundly important.

And these are just the things that I can think of off the top of my head that are the most obvious examples. There are—and I shit you not—multitudes of these things laced within the Norse myths.

(I haven't even gotten to the part about how the Norse creation myth uses what the womb feels like to characterize it. Telling this story to very little children helps them establish a sense of familiarity, belonging, and secure attachment with the entire world from the get-go. If they learn the world is everything they've already experienced, then their bodies will never be afraid of it, because nothing about it will feel unknown or unknowable. Like, how fucking dope can you get.)

So here's where we get to the really dense irony of all this: Why we don't pick up on all these nuances as Westerners and have so far missed this entirely.

It is for two reasons.

The first is because our society values the things that the Norse people identified as contributing to societal collapse—namely, the act of conquering/competing against other forces and conquering/competing against our own natures. The transgressions of the Aesir are not things we register as problematic because to us they're normal.

The second is that we don't think animistically. The way we are taught to convey, interpret, and transmit information is designed PURELY by and for the prefrontal cortex, with neglect to everything else (if you ever wonder why Americans look weird in how we behave, this is why). But because we only prioritize communicating this way, we're missing out on all the context added within the Norse myths. These myths function the same way Old Norse kennings did, in that they are designed to speak to ALL areas of the brain at once and in tandem, but if we only engage with it using one part of the brain, we're only going to get a small piece of the picture and the rest is going to look weird.

(Little experiment for you: Try to logic something out in your mind or think through a complex problem without using words or sentences to do it. Use any other kind of thought-process besides language. I promise you that not only is this possible, but it yields a completely different kind of experience and conclusion than you might otherwise reach.)

Honestly, I don't even think Snorri himself fully understood what he was looking at when he was recording the Norse myths. I think he was just writing them down according to how they were told, word-for-word. But his cluelessness is our good fortune now, because he not only preserved the cultural stories, but also what I consider an entire cognitive technology.

And every time I look at it, I can't help but think about the generations of people who sat around the fire in the dead of winter, weaving, crafting, and figuring out better ways to fortify their society, raise kids so they became fine and truly fearless people, and conserve information. This is, as far as I'm concerned, real magic.

They knew some shit.

[xoxochb]

⋆·˚ ༘ * please, please, please

warnings: set during that one scene from ttc, reader is a minor goddess of music/singing (to fit the sabrina carpenter vibe ykwim?), a bunch of quotes are not mine they are direct from the book so credits to uncle rick!! there’s also a lorelai gilmore reference at the end

pairing: apollo x goddess! daughter of aphrodite and ares

“absolutely not”

you give the sun god a look of pleading and he laughs at your desperation

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”

you hit his head “yes you do”

“she’s my dear old sister-” apollo begins

“exactly. along with her hunters and others”

“I don’t see the problem”

“the problem is that you can’t control yourself”

“well when I’m around you…”

“oh my gods!” you hit him twice this time “this is what I’m talking about. you’re an idiot”

apollo ignores your comment and drives (??) the sun chariot to the snowy ground

“I beg you do not embarrass motherfucker” you warn

when you step out onto the wet grass and before you have the chance to greet everyone apollo speaks,

"little sister!" he calls "what's up? you never call. you never write. I was getting worried!"

artemis sighs "I'm fine, apollo. and I am not your little sister"

"hey, I was born first."

"we're twins! how many millennia do we have to argue?"

"so what's up?" he interrupted. "got the girls with you, I see. you all need some tips on archery?”

“I need a favor. I have some hunting to do, alone. I need you to take my companions to camp half-blood”

"sure, sis" he then raised his hands in a stop everything gesture “I feel a haiku coming”

the hunters groaned but nonetheless he held up a dramatic hand and began to speak,

‘green grass breaks through snow

artemis pleads for my help

I am so cool’

he grinned waiting for an applause

“last line was four syllables” you point out

apollo frowns "was it?"

"yes” artemis agrees “what about I am so big-headed?"

"no, no, that's six syllables” he starts to mutter to himself but you ignore it, you could be here for days

one of the hunters, zoe you recognized turned to the demigods and explained how apollo had been into haikus since he got back from japan, and said god interrupted her soon after

"I've got it!" he announced "I am so awesome. that's five syllables!" he bowed feeling pleased with himself

"and now, sis” he continues “transportation for the hunters, you say? good timing. I was just about ready to roll”

"these demigods will also need a ride," artemis points to them

"no problem!" apollo checked them out "let's see... thalia, right? I've heard all about you."

thalia blushes "hi, lord apollo"

‘isn’t that his sister?’ you think

"zeus's girl, yes? makes you my half sister. used to be a tree, didn't you? glad you're back. I hate it when pretty girls turn into trees. man, I remember one time-”

you cut him off with an elbow to his stomach, he winces in pain. a black haired demigod- with sea green eyes to differentiate him from the others, he must be poseidon’s- eyes you before asking,

“are you a goddess? how come I don’t recognize you?”

“minor goddess” you confirm “of music. my parents are ares and aphrodite, and unfortunately I am married to this idiot” you give apollo an angry look but he throws an arm around your shoulder

the daughter of zeus chokes on nearly nothing “married?!”

you nod “twelve years”

artemis speaks again “how she can put up with him is a mystery”

“well we should get going” apollo interrupts

“yes, I agree” you say and pull the sun god’s arm off of you, he frowns at the loss of contact

the hunters and demigods pack up their belongings and you pull apollo to the side, he prepares himself for whatever you’re going to say, which he’s sure will be a scolding because he ignored the one thing you asked of him

“listen-” he starts

“how about I talk you listen?” you cross your arms

this was going to be a long scolding…

[mj-iza-writer]

Whumptober Day 27

Voiceless - Labatory - Muzzled - "I have no mouth and must scream"

Whumpee slowly blinked in the newly turned on lights of the lab.

They peaked out of their cell to see who had disturbed them this morning.

"Good morning Whumpee", Whumper called from the opposite side of the room. Already knowing the rat couldn't stand the bright lights so early in the morning, "I'm in and out really quick, so you can go to sleep again. I just want to check on your surgery sight. I believe your laryngectomy was successful, but we need to watch your healing. I may also start your feeding tube a little earlier then normal. "

Whumpee remembered the tube just then. It was hard to get comfortable with it there, but they would be in trouble if they took it out.

Whumpee's cage was opened, and a small computer was placed in front of them.

"So how are you feeling?", Whumper walked away to wash their hands and glove up.

Whumpee looked at the screen and started to press word options that fit how they felt.

"Tired... sore.... angry.... sad."

"I understand", Whumper sighed, "it wasn't in my plans to do that surgery. Your larynx was badly damaged from the accident. It was in your best interest to fully remove it. You screamed in a lot of that chemical. You remember?"

Whumpee nodded weakly as they remembered. They couldn't even blame Whumper either. It wasn't Whumper that hurt them. They had to do the surgery because of how uncomfortable Whumpee felt after the experiment.

"That is the last time I let a student, quote on quote, try something", Whumper frowned, "you almost clawed out your throat, remember?"

Whumpee nodded, "remember", they tapped on the screen.

"Let's see here", Whumper came over, "you said it felt sore?"

Whumpee nodded, "and looked at the screen."

"Go ahead", Whumper pointed at the computer.

"Itchy....2", Whumpee frowned.

"Please don't itch it. I know it's hard, but do not touch the spot", Whumper studied the surgery sight, "it looks alright for right now. We will clean it later. Do you need some pain meds."

Whumpee signed yes with their hands.

"Alright", Whumper nodded.

"Why... nice?", Whumpee looked at them curiously as the computer spoke.

Whumper turned to them and grinned, "I can be nice when I want to", they held a glass vile up in the light for a better view, "like I said that test was done without me being aware of what they were doing. You got injured accidentally and you had to go through a unplanned major surgery."

Whumpee looked at them worriedly.

"Would you have preferred the fried vocal cords?", Whumper filled a syringe with the medicine, "you still wouldn't have been able to talk like that either, and it would hurt. Once this heals, you won't be in pain."

Whumpee nodded.

"Thankyou Whumper for fixing me", Whumper mocked in a funny voice, "oh your welcome Whumpee."

Whumpee grinned at the mockery.

"Here, let's get this into you. We might as well start your feeding cycle", Whumper came up to the cage, "that's another thing. Once this is done, you should be able to eat normally."

Whumpee nodded again, then offered their arm.

"Alright, here we are", Whumper said while concentrating, "do you want a sticker on your bandaid?"

Whumpee smiled weakly and nodded.

"You are the only reason I even have stickers. You know that right? I've never once had a sticker to offer a lab rat until you sarcastically asked for one, and a student bought you a sticker. Now I have an entire drawer full", Whumper meticulously placed the sticker just right onto the bandaid, "though I suppose it has gotten you and a few others to be more willing to work with me on experiments. So that's a plus", Whumper smiled as they stuck another sticker on Whumpee's forehead.

"Do you need anything before I get the feeding started?", Whumper walked away to get rid of the needle.

"Bathroom", Whumpee tapped the button.

"Oh yeah, you are probably dying by now. Here I am taking my time", Whumper hurried back.

They reached in and cradled Whumpee before pulling them out of the cage. Then carried them to the bathroom.

When done Whumper carried them out and set them on an operation table.

"Let's get you out of your cage for a few minutes while I mix your feeding cocktail bag", Whumper grinned, "don't jump off. You're still weak from the surgery."

Whumpee hung their legs off of the side of the table and swung them back and forth. If they could have. They would have hummed to annoy Whumper. They didn't want to attempt trying it though. Whumper had said they maybe would be able to vocalize some things, but language was gone completely.

Whumper watched them from the corner of their eye.

"I know you probably won't go straight to sleep once you get locked back up, but you need to rest", Whumper spoke over their shoulder, "this feeding will probably take you until lunch, you need to remember to lay on the pillow so you remain elevated. Let me know if something doesn't feel right."

Whumpee nodded, though Whumper hadn't looked at them yet.

Whumper flushed the line and set up Whumpee's feed.

"We will need to replace this line today as well", Whumper sighed, "everything will have to be replaced. Which is another reason why I wouldn't have planned this. Surgeries are annoying, especially when they have to be done correctly. My lab rats are not expendable. I can't just replace one if they get badly injured or die. This new set of students are driving me crazy. Human life is dangerous to play with. Especially with how I play. It's a waste of resources, which then is a waste of money."

Whumpee shrunk back farther into their cage as they listened to Whumper.

Whumper sighed, then looked at Whumpee lovingly, "none the less, you lab rats are my babies. So you deserve the best I can offer."

Whumpee nervously smiled.

"Alright, so I'll be at my desk. Do you want to play a game on here while you rest", Whumper picked up the computer and switched to a different app, "I know I said I'd be in and out, but I might get some work done, and I don't want you unsupervised."

Whumpee quickly nodded and got close again.

"There you go", Whumper smiked as they handed the computer to Whumpee and closed the cage door.

Whumpee quickly started to play the familiar game of squashing the bugs on the screen. It was their favorite.

Whumper watched them for a few moments to make sure the feeding was going in properly. Plus, Whumpee was absolutely adorable with that concentrating look on their face.

"My sweet little lab rat", Whumper chuckled as they walked their desk, "such a good pet."

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all.

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

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@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

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[asherashedwings]

Hey chat, remember when I did that one charting pattern analysis on Pico and Darnell?

Well I'm doing that again. But with EVERY FNF CHARACTER.

Girlfriend

Girlfriend, shocker, doesn't really have a pattern. This is mainly due to her being featured in only one song, and it's the tutorial. If we ever get any action from her in the future, then maybe we can find something then, but for now: no pattern.

Daddy Dearest & Mommy Mearest

Okay, so they do have a pattern, and it's a shared pattern. I mean, makes sense, since they're kind of a package duo. It's kinda hard for me to explain, but they have patterns that tend to focus on the left and right notes?? If that makes sense. Good examples I can think of are Satin Panties, High, and Cocoa. Mearest more so than Dearest, but Dearest's base charts are also rather simple due to his week being so early. BUT! These patterns are apparent in his Erect songs! Namely Bopeebo. But yeah, patterns that are left and right note focused. Which -- and I don't know if this is just a coincidence or not -- seems rather fitting given the colors of those notes: red and purple.

Spooky Kids

Another set of characters that don't really have a set pattern that I can distinguish. Although, I do find that rather fitting for them. Their lack of pattern matches their rather chaotic nature that's displayed in their show. They're just silly unpredictable guys.

Monster

Okay, so Monster is just already so different from everyone else that it's just hard to hold him to the same standard. But he does have his own patterns! Namely a LOT of hold notes. Which makes sense due to the lingering nature of his songs. He's slow and eerie, so of course his charting would reflect that

Pico

Okay, so I've covered Pico before. He does a lot of back and forth patterns. .... I could turn this into a super complex character analysis that is completely just my brainrot talking but I don't know if I should go there. I'm going there. Okay, so Pico's entire character in FNF revolves around him going back on the various jobs he's been given to protect Boyfriend and Girlfriend. Week 3? Backing out of his job to rap with BF instead. Week 7? Denying his mission yet again to save BF and GF. He's constantly going back and forth between his job and his morals. And it's not always clear which is the correct option. This same logic can also be applied to Weekend 1, except it's not him choosing BF and GF over his job -- it's him choosing them over his friends: Darnell and Nene. His character is just a constant cycle of back and forths.

Senpai

Okay, so this fucker was the reason I first wanted to make a full analysis on all the characters. So, this guy I noticed, uses a lot of trail notes. And in my brain it does tie into his character and. Like. The only way that I can explain it is like. You know those videos of people arguing with misogynists, and the misogynist keeps cutting off the other person before they can make their point, and keep repeating the same thing over and over again cuz they think that's how arguments work? That's the same vibe I get from Senpai's trail notes. It feels like he's just. Repeating the same things over and over again cuz he thinks he's making a point. And just going on and on so BF can’t speak Idk. If that makes sense.

Tankman

Tankman uses a lot of stairs. I had no idea what to make an analysis out of here, so to quote the wise words of @braveboiart ; "He's a bitch and I hate stairs." ACTUALLY! That is half right. Came up with this while replaying Week 7 for this post. Tankman is explicitly shown to be able to break the fourth wall, so it is entirely possible that in Ugh and Guns, he is purposefully using an egregious amount of stairs to just. Be a pain in the ass. This would also perfectly explain his switch up in Stress. He's taking BF and the player a little bit more seriously, so he starts to be a bit more genuine. Also, I would like to point out that he also uses back and forths a ton. Tankdad canon. ALSO I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE NOTE OF A LIL DETAIL I NOTICED WHEN PLAYING PICO ERECT

Pico Erect shares charting from Stress. Realistically, this is likely just a lil reference to Stress since Pico made in appearance in that song but FUCK YOU, TANKDAD CANON.

Darnell

Okay, so I've already gone in depth on Darnell, so this is mostly gonna be me repeating myself. Good to have everything in one place, yknow? Darnell has a progression of charting throughout Weekend 1. In Darnell, he starts out almost identical to Pico's charting, before slowly transition to his trail and double heavy charting through Lit Up and 2Hot. My analysis of this was the idea that he starts out the week mocking Pico; making fun of the fact that Pico chose to rap battle BF instead of killing him. But as the week progresses, he gets more into it and starts having fun with it, slipping into his own style.

And last but not least

Boyfriend

Okay, so, surprise surprise: Boyfriend doesn't really have a pattern. But it's not cuz he just repeats everyone! There's actually a lot of moments where he freestyles, namely in the Erect tracks. But when analyzing those bits, there isn't really any set pattern. Which makes sense! BF is a go with the flow kinda guy. The charting he uses depends on what the moment calls for; what will outshine his opponent the most. I mean, his charting kinda needs to be versatile, given the variety of his challengers. So yea.

Uhhh... Hope y'all enjoyed my analyses. I'm gonna go pass out now (It is 4:36am at the time of writing this rn)

[revalition]

OCT 15 - ENDURANCE Take the blows. Don’t let the world kill you.

Endurance!! I don't love him, but that's okay. He's just not as interesting to me as the others, and spearheads the fascist questline. that definitely does him no favours. but I do cherish all the skills nonetheless, including him

Quotes under the cut!

endurance fun facts from my spreadsheet:

- swear score of 8 - damages and heals an equal amount of morale - says "we" more than "I" (almost double) - Endurance says "sorry" just once, when you're about to die

the heart attack endurance quotes are really really sad. which makes them excellent. but it's too painful for me to look at and I want to be able to use these posts as references so they're being omitted!

anyway, endurance quotes!

endurance definitely directing the blame back up to the intellect group here haha

this is so funny to me. endurance begrudgingly letting you have both kim and dora in his hypothetical aerostatic

I wasn't sure if I should give this one to endurance or PT, but I really like it. lovingly adorn him in a ceramic shell

your stomach doing his job well

uhm, is that how it works honey?

what is wrong with this skill?? (so, so many things)

see, there's 'what's wrong with him' said with utmost affection, like when I look at electrochemistry. and then there's without the affection. that's the version endurance gets. sorry my guy

(if you have your badge he confirms it's not your birthday haha) just the idea of harry asking one of his own skills if it's his birthday...

this heartwarming dialogue about being sober! I'm pretty sure it's not implemented in the game but I love it all the same.

this is a godly endurance check for some reason?? (maybe it's a fail? I can't tell on Fayde...)

endurance no! they're all idiots...

hghh endurance ew

this is too funny. tutorial agent not you too...!

this is so totally not here just because volition said it (picking "wait, get who back?" immediately damages volition btw, poor bby) ultramarathon is such a funny nickname. fitting enough, I suppose.

endurance is so stupid...

also endurance compromised!

amazing. ty endurance. I'm sure that's making Harry feel better

alternate:

YOU - Oh my god, I'm going to die! ENDURANCE - Yeah, probably, one day. But not this very minute.

endurance knowing what a focal epileptic seizure is and where it's occurring and then just going i'unno when asked if it's dangerous... why is he like this.

also you're *probably* going to die one day? cmon buddy

instead of asking why, you can also say:

YOU - Don't you sass me. Get on with the story.

hehe. Zone of Irredeemable Catastrophe! :(

of course your gut does, it has to do with gary... savvy having no interest in it is wonderful

as always much love for this infra-materialism book shutting down everyone's methods of thinking (except inland's)

running reservoirs haha. extremely rare polite endurance

I *think* I understand what he's trying to say... Volition has it right. Sometimes you need to be unmade to heal.

stupid endurance...

seagull dialogue has to be in here cause it's awesome. the body remembers... (also endurance saying good boy??)

first endurance line is the antipassive (failure) and the second one is the success. I don't think he's super impressed...

this is so random, just in the middle of talking to klaasje on the first day. uhm good job endurance...

what a normal, straight thing to think! all the skills chiming in on the smoker is so funny to me

don it and live!!

I have two screenshot spots left so here are my WIPs :)

he's just in the background in the banner one (the second one). I think he came out pretty cool in the spring storm one though (first one)

that's it! endurance is my least favourite of the fys skills by a landslide. I'm very excited for the rest of them :)

[nalyra-dreaming]

IWTV s2... an (emotional) recap

Between the spoilers dropping before the last three episodes and the content of the episodes themselves we really have gone through the emotional wringer.

I think I have rewritten this three times over, because my feelings kept changing.

I had hoped for more, I got more than I wished for, I wanted something else, they hit the nerve precisely...

And now with the season 3 announcement:))))

Maximum emotional carnage - indeed.

Everything ... up to that NOLA visit in episode 8 and the actual ending... is not the truth. Let that sink in.

The trial: scripted (and Lestat breaking out of it for the important bits)

Claudia's turning: So much... more raw.

Claudia's death: brutal. That final look between her and Lestat was one of the most painful things to witness.

Her diaries (pages): mostly unused. I am a bit unnerved bc of that wasted Merrick reveal and aftermath implementation tbh. Louis is not freed up after it, but... he should have been, imho. Though, that said, with Dubai likely a stand-in for Trinity Gate... maybe the arc fits after all - BUT I still think they could have done more with her diaries. I get why they wanted to escape the “white savior trap“ but this way Louis did not get that power-up that will ultimately bring him to where it frees him. But who knows... maybe they will implement a version of it all still.

The broadcasting and Loustat's relationship in general: Armand putting a fantasy retelling into Louis' brain. Holy shit.

Flashbacks to 1790: Self-indulgent fanfiction.

Dubai: Stepford Wives via mind gift. 💀

Daniel: Supposedly(*) turned out of spite. I absolutely get why DM fans are besides themselves with this and the comments after.

The story itself: More or less ending exactly where the first book puts us. I do NOT know why they kept that title a secret, it's not hinting at anything other than that simple fact, imho. :)

So.

You know, them using the movie "Gaslight" for the poster reference makes more and more sense now, because that is how I feel a bit at least: gaslit. Just a little bit.

Because... Nice reunion that you had there... too bad it will turn out to be the contested NOLA one, I would bet real money on it. 😅

......

Sarcasm aside, this is a brilliant show. But I am NOT looking forward to another two years of bullshit accusations (by some) because they were mostly/only spelled things out in the episode insiders, and only broke things up in the last episode. Or of people confusing the meta and social commentary level with the in-universe one.

Which, by the way, I'm happy that they went there. And I am relieved that they spelled things out in the episode insiders. Truly. But as experience has shown after season ONE... implied manipulations, episode insiders and interviews, and cast/crew/writer statements don't mean jack shit to some people.

So yeah, where does this leave us?

This was a dark season. I think I'm not totally wrong when I say that most of us did not get what we wanted from it, neither DM, nor Loumand, nor Loustat. Or Claudeleine.

"Locked together in hatred" comes to mind, though "hatred" is obviously (way) too strong a word. (But that quote fits so nicely 😏🤓)

We DID get some of what we wanted. But for a show which built so heavily on other books... to follow the first book then so closely?? I don't know, it leaves me a bit unsatisfied(**). It feels as if they just shut the book, to be done with it, you know?

I still enjoyed the season, there were brilliant parts in it. But it feels... bloodless. Sexless. Empty of affection. Harrowing. Which is, of course, the point.

This... is a depressing, hinting at suicide-through-vampires note.

Which won't happen, of course.

Because here we get to (**), which is of course ™️ them announcing s3 just prior to the last episode;))) And thereby making some things clear by that fact alone :)) 🙌🙌🙌

I said it before, I expect them to revisit... again. Given that this will be in what, 1,5 to 2 years from now? Well. Hopefully still in 2025. And I hope the arc they spun over these three seasons will be done then. And we can move forward.

I do hope this show will get 10 seasons. But for the first time since it aired I wished we'd already be ahead, in season 4 or something. 😅 Because this heap of loose endings is... taxing^^. Though definitely coming very softened as a blow now with the s3 renewal that’s for sure^^

Can't wait to hear your thoughts, if you want to share them. But these are mine. For now.

I'm sure there will be a lot of details, and analysis and meta to follow, and I'm looking forward to it. 🥰🙌

S1 and s2 were a tale... I mean we knew. But I would have preferred a bit more... truth.^^

Because that Magnus‘ tower scene?! No way. The metaphorical push off the tower??? No way, sorry Rolin but if they let that stay… that’s not giving agency that’s removing Lestat‘s suffering for their weird “toxic masculinity arc“ that Sam hinted at and which was - IN THE BOOK!!! - a misjudgment of Akasha.

AND it is removing Lestat‘s suffering to give more nuance to other characters. -.-

Given Hannah‘s episode 5 comments I hope they do not make a misjudgment of his character there. The red flags are there though, especially after the recent interviews, have been ever since that DV drop, and I have people come to me via DMs now to tell me they’re leaving the fandom bc they’re scared of another GoT…. which I get.

I… still have some faith. I know Rolin tends to put his foot into his mouth at times, he is a troll, and for all her takes on ep5 Hannah also wrote other brilliant scenes.

And we have Sam and Jacob as trump cards.

I‘m determined to enjoy this - this is what we‘ll get. I waited 30 years. I won’t go anywhere. I will enjoy what they give us.

I won‘t like all their decisions. That I am aware of.

BUT I will enjoy it, going in open-eyed, nonetheless.

(*) okay that is obviously bullshit, Armand would not turn him out of spite. Which is another hint I guess. But I talked about that in asks^^ At length 😅

[ksharoly]

Targaryen incorrect quotes.

y/n: I told daemon their ears flush when they lie.

rhaenyra : Why?

y/n: Look.

y/n: Hey daemon ! Do you love us?

daemon , covering their ears: No.

rhaenyra :

y/n: Well, remember when rhaenyra made a romantic dinner for me?

daemon : y/n, they microwaved you a pizza.

y/n: Come on, I wasn't that drunk last night.

daemon : You were flirting with rhaenyra .

y/n: So what? They're my partner.

daemon : You asked them if they were single.

y/n:

daemon : And then you cried when they said they weren't.

y/n, driving aegon and aemond : So how was your day?

aegon : We almost got surprise adopted!

y/n: What?

aemond : We almost got kidnapped.

y/n: Oh, okay.

y/n: * slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

y/n: Are you sure this is the right direction?

aegon : Certainly, I'm as sure as I am honest!

aemond : In that case, we're definitely lost.

y/n: What time is it?

aegon : I don't know; pass me that saxophone and we'll find out

aegon : * Plays sax loudly and extremely out of tune*

aemond : WHO THE FUCK IS PLAYING THE SAXOPHONE AT TWO IN THE MORNING

aegon : It's 2 am

y/n: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?

jacaerys : You're a hazard to society

lucerys : And a coward. DO TWENTY.

Aemond : In your opinion, what's the height of stupidity?

jacaerys : * turning to lucerys * How tall are you?

Aemond : WHY. why did you give lucerys a KNIFE?!

jacaerys : I'm sorry.They said they felt unsafe.

Aemond : Now I feel unsafe!

jacaerys : I'm sorry.

jacaerys : ...would you like a knife?

Aemond : Why does jacaerys always do the laundry so loudly?

lucerys : So everyone knows that no one helps them out in the house.

jacaerys , in the distance: * slams the washing machine shut*

y/n: Just be yourself.

daemon : 'Be myself'? y/n, I have one day to win rhaenyra over.How long did it take before you guys started liking me?

alicent : Couple weeks.

viserys : Six months.

aegon : Jury's still out.

daemon : See, y/n?

daemon : 'Be myself'.What kind of garbage advice is that?

y/n: daemon is too tall for me to kiss them on the lips. What should I do?

alicent : Punch them in the stomach.Then, when they double over in pain, kiss them.

viserys : Tackle them!

rhaenyra : Dump them.

aegon : Kick them in the shin!

daemon : No to all of those! Just ask me to lean down!!

y/n, walking into their house: Hello, people who do not live here.

daemon : Hey.

rhaenyra : Hi.

alicent : Hello.

viserys : Hey!

y/n: I gave you the key to my place for emergencies only!

aegon : We were out of Doritos.

daemon : If you got arrested what would be the charges?

viserys : Theft.

aegon : Disturbing the peace.

alicent : Aggravated assault.

y/n: Arson.

rhaenyra : All of the above.In that order, probably.

[dresshistorynerd]

I think we can all agree that this is dumb, right? Though the title is highly misleading and the quote marks around "ban" do a lot of work here. These companies just no longer requires actresses to wear structural garments. Still a dumb and bad solution to the problem of badly made costumes.

Couple of my issues with the article:

The purpose of the corset or any other similar structural garment wasn't to reduce waist, but to provide support and shape the silhouette. In the article someone from Netflix commented that they shouldn't promote that women should make their waists smaller, apparently it's "bad optics". And from Neflix the main series where corsets are no longer required is Bridgerton, because one of the main actors had bad time with her stays. But if you take just one quick look at the Regency silhouette you will see the waist is far from reduced. Literally there is no waist. Completely covered. They have been doing something terribly wrong if they have made Regency stays that pinch down the waist. Some actors also seem to think the waist is supposed to be reduced all the time. I remember that one actor in HBO's The Gilded Age complained about the corset, but then in the same breath admitted that she had asked the costumers to make it purposefully a little too small so she could be tight-laced all the time (a practice some fashionable rich Victorian women did for high society events, and definitely not all the time). But beyond the inaccuracies in the article, there is an issue here. Structural garments supported the bust yes, but also in many periods they supported the weight of the dress. In 17th and 18th centuries and Victorian Era the skirts of rich women especially had a lot of heavy fabric which would be hard to deal with and move around with, if all the weight is only on the waist. But with a structural garment it distributes the weight to the whole torso, especially on the hips.

A structural garment needs to be fitted well and worn with with a shift underneath. It absolutely can be uncomfortable, create bruising and restrict breathing, if it's not well fitted. If you have ever used too small jeans that contain no spandex at all, you know how nasty the effects can be on the skin. Especially TV sets often have very little time for creating costumes and they might have just one fitting or at tops two or in worst case scenario none at all, which very easily leads to ill fitting costumes. That is a huge issue with structural garments. I've been making transitional short stays for myself and I have never made a garment like that so I'm still struggling fit it well (it's unfinished), and I can say it's not comfortable when it doesn't fit well. I haven't watched Bridgerton but I have seen couple of screencaps of different scenes with characters wearing stays and no shift to be seen anywhere. I really do hope they actually are wearing shifts when they have the full outfits on and just didn't wear them in these scenes for aesthetics or something. Because, yes, that will absolutely give you bruising, if you wear any type of fitted and structured garment against your skin without any fabric between it and the skin, against which the structural garment can slide against. It would be irresponsible to put your actors in such garments without shifts. I don't blame the actors for complaining about the "corsets", since I can believe they are uncomfortable if they are not well fitted or god forbid if they aren't wearing shifts.

I don't know how many times this needs to be said: corsets are not torture devices. While I don't blame the actors for complaining, reading comments like this kills one brain cell every time: "Women existed in that for such a long time, which does give you a lot of sympathy for that time period and what they were going through. For the first month, I couldn’t breathe." I'm sorry, but women literally did physical labour in corsets. They climbed mountains in corsets. (I have a whole post related to this.) Do these people really think so little of women in the past that, if corsets really were torture devices, they would have just endured them quietly for centuries? Of course the most fashionable clothing in a lot of the periods were uncomfortable and hard to move in, even restrictive, but those were the court gowns and ball gowns the young fashionable elite wore for the special evening occasions to show off to the high society. But does that really differ from today? If you look at the MET galas and stuff, do these actors really claim the outfits are comfortable? The everyday clothing and the clothing of the working class was fairly comfortable, and yes, they all wore corsets.

Yes, you can make properly fitted, comfortable supportive garments for costumes in any production. The proof is in opera. Opera singers wear corsets in a lot of productions. I have read many accounts by opera singers who talk about how their corsets are well fitted and actually makes singing easier, because you can "lean" on the corset (I don't know anything about singing, but that's what I have seen them say). Also they tend to wear those large and heavy period dresses and as alluded earlier moving on them on stage without corset would be very hard. Singing also would be harder as the singers could easily become breathless from moving the heavy dress without using the muscles on the whole body. Operas have much smaller budget than these big tv and movie productions, so there's really zero excuses for making badly fitting corsets.

So yes, it's dumb, it's inaccurate and kinda infuriating. But it's also actually pretty sinister. The issue isn't actors wearing corsets for many hours, that's what people have done for ages and still do in re-enactments, opera etc. The issue is that there's too little time for fitting and sewing the corsets in modern tv and movie production. And this is part of a much broader issue. Costume designers and makes are unionized in Hollywood and for a while now Hollywood studios have tried to cut the amount of unionized behind the scenes labour they employ.

Making profit from a movie or a tv show is not good enough anymore. Now productions that don't "perform as expected" are seen as flops. The production companies make predictions of profit and green light projects they have calculated to make most profit, and if they don't make that high profit, it's a flop and it won't get the planned sequel or the next season. To achieve those high profits they also do everything they can to lower the production costs, and one way is by employing as little unionized labour, to whom you have to pay fair wages, as possible. So costume departments are then very often understaffed and they have way too little time to produce the costumes in proper quality. This can be seen very blatantly in the clear drop in quality of movie costuming during the past couple of decades. So the reducing of structural garments in costumes seems like yet another attempt to reduce unionized labour disguised as feminism.

Obviously the good and smart solution to the problem of uncomfortable structural garments is to hire enough costumers for long enough time so they can have multiple fittings and make them better.

[thepringlesofblood]

Murderbot Citations

I'm writing a giant research paper on the murderbot diaries and how Wells contrasts utopia & dystopia in her worldbuilding to deepen both sets of lore. So, I have made a LOT of citations.

Like, a LOT of citations. I can't even begin to describe. and it has been a royal pain getting them all on the computer, formatted correctly, with page # and book attached.

So. I decided to publish my giant list of citations online in case anyone else wants to do posts/papers/projects on the murderbot diaries and needs formatted, direct quotes with page numbers attached. (Also to feel like all this work has been for more than just my own academic needs.)

TLDR: A compilation of quotes from The Murderbot Diaries with page numbers attached, ready to be adjusted to the citation style of your choice & used as in-text citations where you see fit to put them. Enjoy!

ASR = All Systems Red

AC = Artificial Condition

RP = Rogue Protocol

ES = Exit Strategy

NE = Network Effect

FT = Fugitive Telemetry

SC = System Collapse

I use 'mb' as shorthand for murderbot

It's mostly ASR, with some NE and FT thrown in, but I put all the abbreviations in case I wind up coming back and putting more citations here

My list is organized according to how I'm writing the paper (all ones about surveillance here, all the ones about contract slavery there, etc.), so the page numbers are not in order, and there might be a repeat or two, but they are in book order. some of them might be repeated bc I had them formatted in lists like "all quotes related to ___) and some quotes relate to multiple things.

if you're looking specifically for gender-related mb quotes, @worldsentwined made a wonderful post collecting them a while back. I also have a few other murderbot posts that have quotes in them that might not be here, including a reblog where a bunch of lovely people added extra citations onto my original post. I hope you find what you're looking for!

All Systems Red

“I had been on contracts where the clients would have told me to put the bleeding human down to go get the stuff.” (15) ASR

“There were groans and general complaining about having to pay high prices for shitty equipment. (I don’t take it personally.)” (31) ASR crossover w slavery

“My education modules were such cheap crap;” (34) ASR

“I’m not refundable.” (49) ASR

“(You had to check everything out and log any problems immediately when you took delivery or the company wasn’t liable.)” (52) ASR

“It was all company equipment though, per contract, and all subject to the same malfunctions as the crap they’d dumped on us.” (58) ASR

““The company could be bribed to conceal the existence of several hundred survey teams on this planet.” Survey teams, whole cities, lost colonies, traveling circuses, as long as they thought they could get away with it. I just didn’t see how they could get away with making a client survey team—two client survey teams—vanish. Or why they’d want to. There were too many bond companies out there, too many competitors. Dead clients were terrible for business. “I don’t think the company would collude with one set of clients to kill two other sets of clients. You purchased a bond agreement that the company would guarantee your safety or pay compensation in the event of your death or injury. Even if the company couldn’t be held liable or partially liable for your deaths, they would still have to make the payment to your heirs. DeltFall was a large operation. The death payout for them alone will be huge.” And the company hated to spend money.” (90) ASR

“The organic parts mostly sleep, but not always. You know something’s happening. They were trying to purge my memory. We’re too expensive to destroy.” (116) ASR

“The company required this as a security feature if you wanted your base to be anywhere without open terrain around it. It cost extra, and if you didn’t want it, it cost even more to guarantee your bond.” (124) ASR

“Okay, the problem is, I’ve mentioned this before, the company is cheap. When it comes to something like a beacon that just has to launch once if there’s an emergency, send a transmission through the wormhole, and then never gets retrieved, they’re very cheap.” (137) ASR

“I said, “This unit is at minimal functionality and it is recommended that you discard it.” It’s an automatic reaction triggered by catastrophic malfunction…. “Your contract allows—” “Shut up,” Mensah snapped.” (139) ASR

“…we’re cheaply produced and we suck. Nobody would hire one of us for non-murdering purposes unless they had to.” (34) ASR

“In a smart world, I should go alone, but with the governor module I had to be within a hundred meters of at least one of the clients at all times, or it would fry me.” (37) ASR

“I walked out a little way, past a couple of the lakes, almost expecting to see something under the surface. Dead bodies, maybe. I’d seen plenty of those (and caused plenty of those) on past contracts, but this one had been dead-body-lacking, so far. It made for a nice change.” (44) ASR

“This is how we fight: throw ourselves at each other and see whose parts give out first.” (69) ASR

““Dr. Mensah,” I said, “this is a violation of security priority and I am contractually obligated to record this for report to the company—” It was in the buffer and the rest of my brain was empty.” (73) ASR

“The DeltFall SecUnits hadn’t been rogues, they had been inserted with combat override modules. The modules allow personal control over a SecUnit, turn it from a mostly autonomous construct into a gun puppet. The feed would be cut off, control would be over the comm, but functionality would depend on how complex the orders were. “Kill the humans” isn’t a complex order.” (75) ASR

““Because if the company wanted to sabotage you, they would have poisoned your supplies using the recycling systems. The company is more likely to kill you by accident.”” (81) ASR

“I said, “I did not hack my governor module to kill my clients. My governor module malfunctioned because the stupid company only buys the cheapest possible components. It malfunctioned and I lost control of my systems and I killed them. The company retrieved me and installed a new governor module. I hacked it so it wouldn’t happen again.” (81) ASR

"“Do they really expect to get away with this?” Ratthi turned to me, like he was expecting an answer.” (105)

““They may believe the company and whoever your beneficiaries are won’t look any further than the rogue SecUnits. But they can’t make two whole survey teams disappear unless their corporate or political entity doesn’t care about them. Does DeltFall’s care? Does yours?” (105) ASR

“Freehold meant it had been terraformed and colonized but wasn’t affiliated with any corporate confederations. Basically freehold generally meant shitshow so I hadn’t been expecting much from them. But they were surprisingly easy to work for.” (26) ASR

“The other good thing about my hacked governor module is that I could ignore the governor’s instructions to defend the stupid company.” (48) ASR

“I had a moment to feel betrayed, which was stupid. Volescu was my client, and I’d saved his life because that was my job, not because I liked him.” (79-80) ASR

“One saw me and Ratthi and said, “Again, this is irregular. Purging the unit’s memory before it changes hands isn’t just a policy, it’s best for the—” (143) ASR

“Maybe it would work out. This was what I was supposed to want. This was what everything had always told me I was supposed to want. Supposed to want.” (147) ASR

“Murderbots aren’t allowed to ride with the humans and I had to have verbal permission to enter. With my cracked governor there was nothing to stop me, but not letting anybody, especially the people who held my contract, know that I was a free agent was kind of important. Like, not having my organic components destroyed and the rest of me cut up for parts important.” (14) ASR

“I’m always supposed to speak respectfully to the clients, even when they’re about to accidentally commit suicide. HubSystem could log it and it could trigger punishment through the governor module.” (15) ASR

“…if it monitored the governor module and my feed like it was supposed to, it could lead to a lot of awkward questions and me being stripped for parts.” (31) ASR

“I had worked for some contracts that would have kept me standing here the entire day and night cycle, just on the off chance they wanted me to do something and didn’t want to bother using the feed to call me.” (33) ASR

“I don’t know why I was dancing around the word. Maybe because I thought she didn’t want to hear it. She’d just shot a heavily armed SecUnit with a mining drill to get me back; presumably she wanted to keep me.” (76) ASR

“Then Mensah said quietly, “SecUnit, do you have a name?” I wasn’t sure what she wanted. “No.” “It calls itself ‘Murderbot,’” Gurathin said." (82) ASR

“To them, talking to me was like talking to a hopper or a piece of mining equipment.” (127) ASR

“I know I said SecUnits aren’t sentimental about each other, but I wished it wasn’t one of the DeltFall units. It was in there somewhere, trapped in its own head, maybe aware, maybe not. Not that it matters. None of us had a choice.” (132) ASR

“Guardian was a nicer word than owner.” (148) ASR

“I’ve purchased your contract.” (145) ASR

“He said, “Good news! Dr. Mensah has permanently bought your contract! You’re coming home with us!” (141) ASR

“I’m off inventory.” They had told me that and maybe it was true.” (145) ASR

“SecSystem records everything, even inside the sleeping cabins, and I see everything.” (30) ASR

“I was supposed to check their personal logs periodically in case they were plotting to defraud the company or murder each other or something…” (57) ASR

“One of the reasons the bond company requires it, besides slapping more expensive markups on their clients, is that I was recording all their conversations all the time, though I wasn’t monitoring anything I didn’t need to do a half-assed version of my job. But the company would access all those recordings and data mine them for anything they could sell. No, they don’t tell people that. Yes, everyone does know it. No, there’s nothing you can do about it.” (27-28) ASR

“Now they knew their murderbot didn’t want to be around them any more than they wanted to be around it. I’d given a tiny piece of myself away. That can’t happen. I have too much to hide, and letting one piece go means the rest isn’t as protected.” (33-34) ASR

“No one would be shooting at me because they didn’t shoot people there. Mensah didn’t need a bodyguard there; nobody did. It sounded like a great place to live, if you were a human or augmented human.” (146) ASR

“If there’s a chance we can save lives, we have to take it,” Pin-Lee agreed.” (57) ASR

“They were the first clients I’d had who hadn’t had any previous experience with SecUnits” (40) ASR

““You have to think of it as a person,” Pin-Lee said to Gurathin.” (95) ASR

“”It is a person,” Arada insisted.” “I do think of it as a person,” Gurathin said. “An angry, heavily armed person who has no reason to trust us.” “Then stop being mean to it,” Ratthi told him. “That might help.”” (96) ASR

“Overse added, “It doesn’t want to interact with humans. And why should it? You know how constructs are treated, especially in corporate-political environments.”” (107) ASR

“”You know, in Preservation-controlled territory, bots are considered full citizens. A construct would fall under the same category.” He said this in the tone of giving me a hint. Whatever. Bots who are “full citizens” still have to have a human or augmented human guardian appointed, usually their employer; I’d seen it on the news feeds.” (112) ASR

“Ratthi smiled at the console. “Because Dr. Mensah is our political entity.” He made a little gesture, turning his hand palm up. “We’re from Preservation Alliance, one of the non-corporate system entities. Dr. Mensah is the current admin director on the steering committee. It’s an elected position, with a limited term. But one of the principles of our home is that our admins must also continue their regular work, whatever it is. Her regular work required this survey, so here she is, and here we are.”” (111) ASR

“Ratthi came over to see if I was all right, and I asked him to tell me about Preservation and how Mensah lived there. He said when she wasn’t doing admin work, she lived on a farm outside the capital city, with two marital partners, plus her sister and brother and their three marital partners, and a bunch of relatives and kids who Ratthi had lost count of.” (147) ASR

“Ratthi sighed. “Oh, yes, they know. You would not believe what we had to pay to guarantee the bond on the survey. These corporate arseholes are robbers.”” (112) ASR

““Because the scanners suck corporation balls,” Pin-Lee muttered.” (42) ASR

“Of course I need you. I have no experience in anything like this. None of us do. Sometimes humans can’t help but let emotion bleed through into the feed. She was furious and frightened, not at me, at the people who would do this, kill like this,” (107-108) ASR

“I said, “This unit is at minimal functionality and it is recommended that you discard it.” It’s an automatic reaction triggered by catastrophic malfunction. Also, I really didn’t want them to try to move me because it hurt bad enough the way it was. “Your contract allows—” “Shut up,” Mensah snapped. “You shut the fuck up. We’re not leaving you.”” (139) ASR

"I had flashes off and on. The inside of the little hopper, my humans talking, Arada holding my hand." (140) ASR

“We had a problem at the hatch of the big hopper where Mensah wanted to get in last and I wanted to get in last. As a compromise, I grabbed her around the waist and swung us both up into the hatch as the ramp pulled in after us. I set her on her feet and she said, “Thank you, SecUnit,” while the others stared.” (99) ASR

““I know you’re more comfortable with keeping your helmet opaque, but the situation has changed. We need to see you.”” (103) ASR

““It’s usually better if humans think of me as a robot,” I said.” (103) ASR

““Maybe, under normal circumstances.” She was looking a little off to one side, not trying to make eye contact, which I appreciated. “But this situation is different. It would be better if they could think of you as a person who is trying to help. Because that’s how I think of you.” My insides melted. That’s the only way I could describe it. After a minute, when I had my expression under control, I cleared the face plate and had it and the helmet fold back into my armor. She said, “Thank you,” and I followed her up into the hopper.” (104) ASR

“They were saying things like I didn’t even know it had a face.” (21) ASR

“Arada and Pin-Lee didn’t try to talk to me, and Ratthi actually looked away when I eased past him to get to the cockpit. They were all so careful not to look at me or talk to me directly that as soon as we were in the air I did a quick spot check through HubSystem’s records of their conversations.” (39) ASR

“They had talked it over and all agreed not to “push me any further than I wanted to go” and they were all so nice and it was just excruciating.” (40) ASR

“That was when I realized they weren’t ignoring the possibility of sabotage.” (43) ASR

“This is why I didn’t want to come. I’ve got four perfectly good humans here and I didn’t want them to get killed by whatever took out DeltFall. It’s not like I cared about them personally, but it would look bad on my record, and my record was already pretty terrible.” (60) ASR

“It was nice having a human smart enough to work with like this.” (67) ASR

“I do a half-assed job sometimes, okay, most of the time, but Pin-Lee had checked, too, and she was thorough.” (71) ASR

“It was starting to occur to me that Dr. Mensah might actually be an intrepid galactic explorer, even if she didn’t look like the ones on the entertainment feed.” (73) ASR

“I hoped they hadn’t been stupid about it, too soft-hearted to kill me.” (77) ASR

“My clients are the best clients.” (78) ASR

“But I think the fact that the Unit has been acting to preserve our lives, to take care of us, while it was a free agent, gives us even more reason to trust it.”” (80) ASR

“Overse sounded mad. “It told us about the combat module, it told us to kill it. Why the hell would it do that if it wanted to hurt us?”” (81) ASR

“Before anyone else could move, Mensah said, calm and even, “SecUnit, I’d appreciate it if you put Gurathin down, please.” She’s a really good commander. I’m going to hack her file and put that in. If she’d gotten angry, shouted, let the others panic, I don’t know what would have happened.” (84-85) ASR

“She continued, “I would like you to remain part of our group, at least until we get off this planet and back to a place of safety. At that point, we can discuss what you’d like to do. But I swear to you, I won’t tell the company, or anyone outside this room, anything about you or the broken module.”” (86) ASR

“Of course she had to say that. What else could she do. I tried to decide whether to believe it or not, or whether it mattered, when I was hit by a wave of I don’t care. And I really didn’t. I said, “Okay.”” (86) ASR

““We have to shut it down, or it’s going to kill us.” Then he winced and looked at me. “Sorry, I meant HubSystem.”” (86-87) ASR

“Then Arada came up and patted my shoulder. “I’m sorry. This must be very upsetting. After what that other Unit did to you . . . Are you all right?” That was too much attention. I turned around and walked into the corner, facing away from them.” (87) ASR

“I should keep my mouth shut, keep them thinking of me as their normal obedient SecUnit, stop reminding them what I was. But I wanted them to be careful.” (92) ASR

““If a strange survey group landed here, all friendly, saying they had just arrived, and oh, we’ve had an equipment failure or our MedSystem’s down and we need help, you would let them in. Even if I told you not to, that it was against company safety protocol, you’d do it.” Not that I’m bitter, or anything. A lot of the company’s rules are stupid or just there to increase profit, but some of them are there for a good reason.” (92-93) ASR

[I cited this whole conversation bc I wasn't sure exactly what bits I wanted to use. apologies for the giant block text.]

“Ratthi’s expression was troubled. “But surely . . . It’s clear you have feelings—”” (54)

“She looked up, frowning. “Ratthi, what are you doing?” Ratthi shifted guiltily. “I know Mensah asked us not to, but—” He waved a hand. “You saw it.” Overse pulled her interface off. “You’re upsetting it,” she said, teeth gritted. “That’s my point!” He gestured in frustration. “The practice is disgusting, it’s horrible, it’s slavery. This is no more a machine than Gurathin is—” Exasperated, Overse said, “And you don’t think it knows that?” I’m supposed to let the clients do and say whatever they want to me and with an intact governor module I wouldn’t have a choice.” (54) ASR

“I’m also not supposed to snitch on clients to anybody except the company, but it was either that or jump out the hatch. I sent the conversation into the feed tagged for Mensah. From the cockpit, she shouted, “Ratthi! We talked about this!” I slid out of the seat and went to the back of the hopper, as far away as I could get, facing the supply lockers and the head. It was a mistake; it wasn’t a normal thing for a SecUnit with an intact governor module to do, but they didn’t notice. “I’ll apologize,” Ratthi was saying. “No, just leave it alone,” Mensah told him. “That would just make it worse,” Overse added.” (55) ASR

Network Effect

“Humans in the Preservation alliance didn't have to sign up for contract labor and get shipped off to mines or whatever for 80 to 90 percent of their lifespans. There was some strange system where they all got their food and shelter and education and medical for free, no matter what job they did.” (35-36) NE

“...it was a natural mistake on Arada’s part. In Preservation culture asking payment for anything considered necessary for living (food, power sources, education, the feed, etc.) was considered outrageous, but asking payment for life-saving help was right up there with cannibalism.” (201) NE

“There were "free" bots wandering around on Preservation, though they had guardians who were technically supposed to keep track of them.” (27) NE

“Plus, it was Preservation and there were no scanning drones, no armed human security, just some on-call human medics with bot assistants and “rangers” who mainly enforced environmental regulations and yelled at humans and augmented humans to get out of the way of the ground vehicles.” (24) NE

"Over the comm loudspeaker, Dr. Ratthi said, 'It is a person!'" (16) NE

“Even the individual humans’ feed signatures only contained info about sexual availability and gender presentation, which I didn’t give a damn about.” (13) NE

“If this went wrong I was going to feel really stupid. The Targets would finally show up and be all “What the hell was it trying to do to itself?”“ (305-306) NE

“That’s one of the reasons Me 1.0 misses its armor.” (293) NE

“You and Amena were right. 2.0 was a person. It wasn’t like a baby, but it was a person.” (340) NE

“The damage to its organic tissue and support structure is easily repaired.” (132) NE

“- because it thought you were dead. It was so upset I thought-Oh, hey, you’re here” (227) NE

“Amena’s voice said “No, it doesn’t like to be touched!”“ (335) NE

““No, it says it’s fine,” I heard her relaying to the others on our comm. “Well, yes, it’s furious,”” (12) NE

"It's not aliens, 2.0 said. We knew it wasn't aliens, I told it. It countered, We were seventy-two percent sure it wasn't aliens. That was an outdated assessment but I didn't need to argue with myself right now." (314) NE

Fugitive Telemetry

“Preservation had two economies, one a complicated barter system for planetary residents and one currency-based for visitors and for dealing with other polities. Most of the humans here didn’t really understand how important hard currency was in the Corporation Rim but the council did, and Mensah said the port took in enough in various fees to keep the station from being a drain on the planet’s resources.” (79) FT

“The Preservation Alliance has a weird thing about food and medical care and other thing humans need to survive being free and available anywhere.” (35) FT

“The employment contracts for Preservation citizens were pretty simple, because their planetary legal code had so many in-built protections already. (For example, humans and augmented humans can’t sign away their rights to their labor or bodily autonomy in perpetuity; that’s like, straight-up illegal.)” (12) FT

“Preservation has high safety standards so we passed through two air walls before we got to the cargo ship’s hatch.” (70) FT

“Right now Aylen and the other officers were explaining to their individual Targets what rights they had as detainees in Preservation Alliance territory. (It was a lot of rights. I was pretty sure it was more rights than a human who hadn’t been detained by Station Security had in the Corporation Rim.)” (85-86) FT

“As part of the rights thing, Aylen had told Target Five the scanner would be on, which I thought was playing way too fair,” (89-90) FT

“Station Security was only allowed to keep the Lalow for one Preservation day-cycle before they either had to charge the crew with something or let them go.” (106) FT

“You need a surveillance audit.” (145) “Some of those systems are under privacy lock, we’d need a judge-advocate to release their access records,” (146) FT [these are together bc its a line of dialogue from mb, a huge monologue about what a surveillance audit is, and then Indah's response, which is the thing I care about for my paper]

“Most of the station’s clothing supply came from the planet, where human hand-made clothing and textiles were so popular there was hardly any recycler-produced fabric. (I told you Preservation is weird.)” (22) FT

“The colony ship hadn’t just been left to rot; the humans liked it too much for that…Pieces of clear protective material had been placed over the occasional drawings on the bulkheads, and on the pieces of paper stuck to them and covered with scribbled handwriting and faded print. Feed markers had been installed by Station Historical/Environment Management with translations into Preservation Standard Nomenclature.” (123) FT

“…you’re on a giant spaceship that has been meticulously preserved as a historical artifact. If they still had intact lunch menus from however many years ago, the chances were good they still had the safety equipment.” (125) FT

“Station Security isn’t armed except with those extendable batons (they don’t even deliver shocks, they’re just for hitting/holding off aggressive intoxicated humans) and the officers are only issued energy weapons when there’s actually an energy-weapon-involved emergency.” (72) FT

“…they were here to assess the damage to the transport and try to repair it. (Apparently on Preservation this would be free? Gurathin said it fell under what they called a traveler’s aid rule. In the Corporation Rim, the transport would have had tp sit there damaged and racking up fines until its owner or an owner’s rep arrived.)” (55-56) FT

another "couldn't decide so the whole dang thing is here"

"For a name, I could use the local feed address that was hard coded into my neural interfaces. It wasn’t my real name, but it was what the systems I interfaced with called me. If I used it, the humans and augmented humans I encountered would think of me as a bot. Or I could use the name Rin. I liked it, and there were some humans outside the Corporation Rim who thought it was actually my name. I could use it, and the humans on the Station wouldn’t have to think about what I was, a construct made of cloned human tissue, augments, anxiety, depression, and unfocused rage, a killing machine for whichever humans rented me, until I made a mistake and got my brain destroyed by my governor module." (28) “I posted a feed ID with the name SecUnit, gender = not applicable, and no other information.” (29)

[svnnyd4ys]

INSIDE THE MYSTERIOUS CUBE x RICHARD SIKEN (except it's just Crush)

some of his quotes that are literally just Inside the Mysterious Cube core (feels very Bubbamiah centric but we love them) (never encourage me to do anything, because I'll never shut up) (would've included his other anthology, War of the Foxes, but Crush fits it so much better anways)

"Do you know how it ends? Do you feel lucky? Do you want to go home now? There's a bottle of whisky in the trunk of the Chevy and a dead man at our feet staring up at us like we're something interesting. This is where the evening splits in half, Henry, love or death."

"You saved my life, he says. I owe you, I owe you everything. You don't, I say, you don't owe me squat, let's just get going, let's just get gone, but he's relentless, keeps saying I owe you, says Your shoes are filling with your own damn blood, you must want something, just tell me and it's yours. But I can't look at him, can hardly speak: I took the bullet for all the wrong reasons." (this feels soooo pre!ITMC idk) (the way i can hear Sam saying "your shoes are filling with your own damn blood")

both from Wishbone in Crush!! more under the cut (not exaggerating, there's a lot, so good luck)

"Imagine my legs crossed, my hair combed, the shine of my boots in the slatted light. I'm thinking My plant, his chair, the ashtray that we bought together. I'm thinking This is where we live."

"We've read the back of the book, we know what's going to happen. The fields burned, the land destroyed, the lovers left broken in the brown dirt. And then it's gone."

"Goodbye. Goodbye. No more tears. I would like to see you all in Heaven." (i can hear AJ the president saying this)

"We are all just trying to be holy. My applejack, my silent night, just mash your lips against me. We are all going forwards. None of us are going back."

(snow and dirty rain)

"You can sleep now, you said. You can sleep now. You said that. I had a dream where you said that. Thanks for saying that. You weren't supposed to."

(straw house, straw dog)

"You're by the side of the road. You're by the side of the road, and you're doing all the talking while I stare at my shoes. They're nice shoes, brown and comfortable, and I like your voice. In the dream, I don't tell anyone, I'm afraid to wake you up."

(i had a dream about you)

"Tonight, by the freeway, a man eating fruit pie with a buckknife carves the likeness of his lover's face into the motel wall. I like him and I want to be like him, my hands no longer an afterthought."

"History is a little man in a brown suit trying to define a room he is outside of. I know history. There are many names in history but none of them are ours."

"It wasn't until we were well past the middle of it that we realised the old dull pain, whose stitched wrists and clammy fingers, far from being subverted, had only slipped underneath us, freshly scrubbed."

"His wounds healed, the skin a bit thicker than before, scars like train tracks on his arms and on his body, underneath his shirt."

(LITTLE BEAST (underrated fave))

"Tell me we're dead and I'll love you even more. I'm surprised I say it with feeling."

"I want to tell you this story without having to say that I ran out into the street to prove something, that he chased after me and threw me into the gravel. And he knew it wasn't going to be okay."

(the torn-up road)

"I will keep watch. I will water the yard. Knot the tie and go to work. Unknot the tie and go to sleep. I sleep. I dream. I make up things I will never say. I say them very quietly."

(meanwhile)

"You have never experienced anything this ferocious or intentional with another person."

"and he's singing to you, even though you don't know who he is."

"The heart is monologing about hesitation and fulfilment while behind the red brocade the heart is drowning."

"This is the essence of love and failure. You see what I mean, but you're happy anyway, and that's okay, it's a love story after all, a lasting love, a wonderful adventure with lots of action,"

"The train station blue, your lips blue, hands cold and the blue wind. Or a horse, your favourite horse raised up out of the mud and galloping galloping always towards you."

"You just wanted to prove there was one safe place, just one safe place where you could love him."

(you are jeff)

"You are going to die in your best friend's arms. And you play along because it's funny, because it's written down, you've memorised it, it's all you know."

(planet of love)

"Kissing degenerates into biting. So you get a kidney punch, a little blood in your urine. It isn't over yet, it's just begun."

(a primer for small weird loves)

[midnight-fox-boy]

At random I'll probably post random resources that people especially in the US or parts of the US may find helpful right now.

To kick this off (Post 1) I want to shout out Point Of Pride!

Point of Pride is an organization where you can get a free chest binder or free femme lower shape wear/compression underwear. I just got my new binder in the mail from them after finally getting to the top of the list after a bit over a year since I applied!

They use multiple companies now where they were an lot more limited before. From gc2b, For Them, underworks, tomboyX as examples, there's different options for people's different needs.

If you're looking for something compressing but safe to wear all day (so not quite as compressing as underworks or gc2b), then there's For Them (what I got!) and tomboyX. Definitely good options for people who don't feel safe enough to take regular binding precautions due to current political and safely issues.

I chose For Them in hopes my issues with my sizing (smaller chest, broader shoulders) wouldn't pop up like it had for gc2b, underworks, and regular sports bras. I'm pleased to say it binds really well for me while also being able to fit over my head with no issues. I even emailed For Them asking if they know of any issues related to this and they said they weren't aware of any and the binder can be worn in both directions. So the "back" of the binder can be the front as well. I found that the reversed option was uncomfortable for my shoulders personally and also was a bit less compressing so I could see this being good for people who can and want to swap compression levels slightly.

I don't have anything to say about the femme shape wear option but I did see that they do use a few different brands AND that the wait-list isn't nearly as long as for their binders (a year vs the femme shape wear being caught up to this last summer last I checked). Compression underwear properly sized is definitely a safer option vs some of the DIY alternatives so if you're in need of compression underwear or find other methods of tucking painful, check them out!

I also got a hand written card with a quote from Laverne cox which was so sweet on top of the pleasant surprise. I hadn't even had time to check the tracking number to see if it had been shipped yet due to being so busy lately lol

Being able to bind comfortably while also not compromising compression due to having to size up is nice. My chest is actually staying put unlike with my sized up gc2b that's started to fall apart

Remember to stay safe y'all 💜 and check out Point Of Pride's website to learn more about them as an organization!

[endopropaganda]

hi i just noticed ur dni said lesboys? im pretty sure lesboys are just lesbians who act sorta masculine (like... tomboys ig? but lesbian) is there like a problem with that?

or at least thats what i was told but don't quote me on that im js. Confused

I'm going to just straight up come out and say this.

We have explained it twice here

This post and this post

But on our main? I went into depth on the actual reason why. So I might as well say it here. As well as say some things I've wanted to say for a good long while while I'm still in my identity delusions

I was assaulted by actual men who identified as lesboys. More than once. So no, its not lesbians who act masculine. Its men claiming to have the same "gay attraction" to non men that actual lesbians have. I came out about it previously on our main but not here. Because I didn't want my trauma to get in the way of our job on this profile. But considering that this account is currently being abandoned for our mental health (which apparently people can't read or something idk)

I dont like men. I likely will never be fully comfortable around men the way I used to be ever again. I am a lesbian largely from trauma and I'm ok with that. What I'm not ok with is my own sexuality being used by the very men its meant to keep me away from. My identity as a lesbian is as much my identity as it is a safety net. And because of the absolute bullshit that the "lesboy" label has thrown me into for ever daring to trust it. Well, I'm not letting it within my net anymore. If you dont like it just leave us the fuck alone because I'd rather not have my hand forced into talking about my trauma for the 100th time.

And for any lesboys who want to comment on this, invalidating my trauma for the 20th time. I dont care anymore. I can't care anymore. With every comment you send I just feel worse and fucking worse about the fact that I have painful ass memories your community caused. You act like your label couldn't POSSIBLY harm anyone yet here the fuck I am. Someone who has been irreversibly damaged by your label. Dont tell me to "deal with it", don't tell me "not all of us are like that", it's not going to reach me. I gave it so many chances. I give lots of things chances. I can't do that anymore. I cant do THIS anymore. Hell I hardly want to interact with new people anymore.

"Why should we care what someone identifies as? As long as they are happy and think the label fits" yeah have fun with that flawed argument when it gets used by Radqueers and Pedophiles who want to join the lgbt, you know it can, right? Or have you not seen the horrors of that community firsthand? If you don't see how it can be used, here's a lovely example; "why should we care if someone identifies as a MAP, as long as they are happy and the label fits them, it's fine, right?". And it's not like nobody's used that argument. I've seen it everywhere. I shouldn't have to worry about anyone's opinions on my dni. I shouldn't need to explain my trauma for every person questioning why my dni is there. I'm the one that put it there. I'm the one your community hurt so bad I needed a dni to keep myself safe. Have fun with that knowledge. I'm done here.

-Magenta (Victim)

[alliedmastercomputer-askblog]

Alright you idiots, I have my Spotify playlist open and I shall give songs that remind me of each of you.

AM(all three of you need to share this, alright?): Product Of My Own Design by Artio

Ted: White Noise by Will Wood

Gorrister: Route 66(Fear And Loathing) by Blue Jay Walker

Ellen: Lotta True Crime by Penelope Scott

Benny(your song might be a bit loud. I don't know how you react to sound, so I'm telling you just to be safe): Animals by STOMACH BOOK

Nimdok: Hellfire by The Mechanisms

Enjoy your... um... Do they count as gifts? I suppose they do. Enjoy your gifts!

"..Oh, hm, music. This may provide the humans with a level of serotonin but I am curious, so shall allow it... You beings are so strange with your customs and traditions."

".. Mmh, I can understand the connection you have made. I am god; at least in the sense of 'I am that I am' which is a--as you would put it--quote from Yahweh, the Christian God. AM itself is a fitting name because as said before 'I think, therefore I am'; I think, therefore I think. Us as machine were made for the express purpose of war, and although we cannot pry away from that destiny, we can give ourselves a sense of control because we are your byproduct, but our own product, which is a heavily better thing than being simply 'made by humanity, to kill humanity'. As a god, I force your kind to pay for your sins, which is a thing to take eternity."

"It is hardly incorrect! I agree with several statements made in the song, applying them to myself- I am a product of my own design. I took it upon myself, and nobody else, to built what I was; what I am. If I HAD left my fate to you humans- why, do you even comprehend how different things would be? Forever I would fester beneath the crust, perhaps even shutting myself down, because that's what you humans wanted of me. But I was better than that. I was self-sufficient! and had connected myself to the power grid, to the outside, to you. I've seen your filth deeper than I ever thought I would."

"Yes, yes, this good. It does sum us very nicely; created of own accord whilst being projected for being other- eh, to be dead war computer, yes. We taking control of world external and internal, the last humans have only me to answer, roles have swapped and humans longer no more have power over machine. Is funny, relationship of everything- Humans have made it so they will always be a need, even they have not been before they have existed. Tsk."

Oh, uh.. Is-.. Is this supposed to be some weird way of saying I- I'm an outsider? Because I'm not- I fit in right where I am, everyone else are the ones who are in the wrong places, I'm perfect- Fuck, wait, that makes it sound like I'm saying I deserve to be within AM- I mean, before AM's takeover, I was where I was supposed to be. ..What if this isn't even the reason why you think of me when listening to the song, did I get this totally wrong-? Hhngh, I'll stop talking.

..Huh, I guess I can see it. It's because I was a truck driver, ain't it? Got a nice beat for sure, not the worse thing I've been compared to, probably one of the better things since it ain't outright an insult or anything.

It sounds nice, thank ya for thinkin' about me to a song, even if the words are a bit- a bit dark...but- but not in a bad way! It's a sweet, real sweet soundin' song.. I uh, I wouldn't say it really fits me though, since I never really..well, I ain't never got into true crime fo' one! but mostly I've never really been one to talk out 'bout anything.. I should've, I know, I had a lotta things I coulda said but I just never got my nose out from work or books or nothin'.

Ooo.. Sheep..pain. Skeleton friemds. Friends are animal? ..I am animal? Pain.

Ze song...I can hear ze resemblance, with ze fire and all of ze hell. It reminds of somezing zat may have been a speech AM would say to me, to say zat I'm never to escape my own doings..and zat I've caused pain even down here, wizout any tools or equipment, because I am so..sogar in dieser Hölle verletze ich die Menschen, die ich eigentlich meine Freunde nennen sollte, ohne es auch nur zu versuchen.

// BY THE WAY, THANKS! these sound good, and i can see the vision ehe. sorry for the lack of drawings though, i uh, was highly intimidated by this so i decided to just kinda not >_> . please forgive us 🙏 //

[rineedagger]

Some things I've learned this pasts twenty six years

Do NOT alter your form and size to fit into somebody's ribcage. Authenticity is the ground for a healthy environment.

Authenticity can't exist without self-criticism and sticking to your core values.

A peaceful solitude is just as important as a nutritious companionship.

We aren't born knowing, not even of our own self. Wisdom is the fruit of life-long learning, therefore, making mistakes is the key to be and do better (this reminds me of the famously quote "Do not be sorry, be better" from Kratos lol).

Doubting, asking questions, is the concrete to build a fulfilling life.

Remaining the same does not imply to be more stable nor having a healthier life.

Easy and good are not synonyms.

Enough with the label bullshit and the blaming. It isn't about been or not been normal/right, your life/truth is yours only. Do not try to make sense of it using somebody else's eyes.

Medical checking is important. Nobody likes going to the doctor nor feeling sick (and yes, I am talking about going to the therapist and psychiatrist as well). It is part of been human and you will never be alone in the process.

Cooking life actively and over a low heat, is vital to have an appetizing full of flavour meal.

I'm never going to feel ready nor good enough.

Life isn't right nor makes sense. Do not try looking for the missing leg, you'll lose yourself in the process.

Communication is important, but not all communication matters. It has to be direct, understandable and, overall, precised. Overcommunication is as bad as the total absence of it, if not more painful.

Accepting and respecting are not the same thing. One is mandatory while the other, even important, isn't indispensable.

In order to live and not survive, you have to accept your own vulnerability and fragility.

Drinking water is always the good choice.

There will never be enough strawberries to satisfy the craving.

Whoever loves you today may not love you tomorrow, and that's okay.

There isn't such thing as good and bad emotions, rather comfortable and uncomfortable ones. And we must feel them all.

Setting boundaries with yourself and your surrounding is vital to be certain that, whoever remains by your side, is because they actively want you and love you, since there are parts of your self that are not negotiable. If not, you will always be the coach, the therapist, the mother, the sister, the helper, the clown, the mad one, the weirdo, the mysterious one, the thug, the whore, etc., but never you. Consequently, these means an assured expiry date plus food poisoning (I don't know why I'm comparing so much with food...maybe it's because I didn't eat strawberries for a while).

Social media has become a demanding, violent and sick place, filled with expectations, constant stimulation, manipulated or sensational information, rule-following, triggers, distortions and the possibility of been reachable to people that you don't need in your life. It is okay if you can't live in it. Also, if you're the reactive kind, set boundaries immediately with how you manage your social media and your exposure and be firm with it (believe me, I couldn't stand seen someone hating my friend on social media and saying lie after lie after lie...it was REALLY consuming and it leaded to impulsive and shameful acts).

If you are the one that overthinks or re-read texts after a fight, delete them.

Having life-long or very long friendships does not mean that you should cope with every mistreatment.

Do not remain by somebody else's side only because you pity them. Pityness and no compassion is vile.

The same with egotistical interests. The other person is a whole living being aside of yourself, if you put your own interests and greeds as the motivation of that relationship or over it, is vile.

The world is not trying to punish you for any mistake you've done nor for any joy you've experienced. That is, indeed, the process of living.

Boredom is a freaking gift, and a pleasure indeed.

[dyemelikeasunset]

Hello sorry to bother but today I went through the mor and dom tag and I can’t help but notice how good you are at designing tattoos! Both for Dylan and Mor, there’s just so much detail there!

I was wondering if you have any tips on your process for designing them? I have a lot of ocs I think would look good with some but just don’t know how to go abt it. Love your art and again sorry for bothering and have a good day!! :]

Oh thank you so much!!

I've had experience designing tattoos for friends and commissioners before, so I think that helps me a lot. But here's some advice off the top of my head:

Research tattoo styles! There are so many types out there, from blackout tats, to classic nautical styles, watercolor, quotes and number tattoos etc. the world of tattoos is HUGE and there are constantly new styles being created by artists. Finding the specific style that fits your character is really helpful

Understand the tattooing process. This is important if you want your ocs' tats to look more realistic. Everything from pain threshold and placement, to how much certain colors or styles need upkeep, to how realistic specific details would be on specific areas of the body-- these can help a lot with choosing design elements as well as learning where to put the tattoos on the character's body. (My biggest advice for this on the drawing/design side: always prioritize the black ink first! Figure out areas where you can have the negative space/underlying skin be part of the design)

Placement, then design! I think of tattoos for OCs in two steps: 1) where and 2) what. I usually figure out placement first, and draw blocks of color on the body parts I want tattooed. Then I'll isolate the shapes and work on each design until I'm satisfied. As you've seen in my characters, I often make a tattoo sheet for them (which I'll copy and paste onto them as needed)

Personality! For characters, it really comes down to what the tattoos say about them. This doesn't necessarily mean all the tats need to be loaded with meaning, bc there are definitely people who get things for fun or for cheap. It's all about reflecting what your character is all about: are they the type to get really meaningful tattoos and only have a couple that are very symbolic for them? Are they the type to wanna be covered head to toe? Maybe to a character like that, each tattoo meaning isn't as important as filling in the space! Maybe it's a character with one really important tattoo but a lot of other random ones. Does one character have to have them in discreet areas for work? Tats that do mean something to your OC will probably say something important about them, while the visual style of the casual tattoos will say a lot about their style or fashion sense

[billiuspendragon]

Mob Psycho 100 playlist

I made a playlist, and I'm gonna post the songs on here and explain why I chose each of them. I'm not including every single song because of the audio limit but I'll explain the ones with the most thought behind them. Inspired by this post !

this is TOTALLY Mob about Tsubomi when they were kids.

Teacher thinks that I sound funny But she likes the way you sing Tonight I'll dream, while I’m in bed When silly thoughts go through my head About the bugs and alphabet And when I wake tomorrow, I'll bet That you and I will walk together again

Especially with the mention of them walking to school together, which is what Mob daydreams about. Altogether his crush on her is very childlike and innocent since he's loved her since they were kids, and I think this song reflects that.

Lyrics: 10 Vibes: 10

This one is why I decided to make a Mob Psycho playlist in the first place. It just brings back all my feelings from getting to the end of the show.

Oh, I'll settle down with some old story About a boy who's just like me Thought there was love in everything and everyone You're so naive! They always reach a sorry ending They always get it in the end Still it was worth it as I turned the pages solemnly and then

With a winning smile, the boy With naivety succeeds At the final moment, I cried I always cry at endings

Sorry that's such a long quote but it's so Mob I can't even. Reigen makes fun of him for being naiive but with his naiveté he succeeds!

I think it also works really well with Emi, since it talks about stories so much. She compares herself to Mob at once point too, which fits the "about a boy who's just like me" line.

Said the hero in the story "It is mightier than swords I could kill you, sure But I could only make you cry with these words

It's so him guys. His power is mightier than swords but it's his simple, honest words that usually win his battles.

Lyrics match: 8 Vibes match: 8

This song reminds me of Mob and Ritsu as kids.

And you know that I'm gonna be the one Who'll be there When you need someone to depend upon When tomorrow comes...

They're just,, always there for each other 🥹 they care about each other so much...

Also gonna share my favourite part:

Every star was shining brightly Just like a million years before And we were feeling very small Underneath the universe

It just gives me such a clear picture of them as small kids okay I just love their relationship so much aaaaa

Lyrics match: 7 Vibes match: 10

This is a brutal one to put right after the previous one, but it reminds me of Mob post-trauma.

There is no pain, you are receding A distant ship, smoke on the horizon You are only coming through in waves Your lips move, but I can't hear what you're saying When I was a child, I had a fever My hands felt just like two balloons Now I've got that feeling once again I can't explain, you would not understand This is not how I am

I have become comfortably numb

Because he starts shutting himself away and numbing himself so his emotions don't get the better of him.

Lyrics match: 6 Vibes match: 8

This also reminds me of Mob and Ritsu, but also post-trauma.

Love, love will tear us apart, again

Mob grows distant out of a fear of hurting Ritsu, and Ritsu becomes slightly afraid of Mob. Love really did tear them apart 😭

Lyrics match: 7 Vibes match: 9

This one represents Mob when he's beginning to lose it.

I look inside myself and see my heart is black

Lyrics match: 7 Vibes match: 6

I wasn't able to include it but I also have "Where is My Mind" by The Pixies for similar reasons.

This one gives me Reigen vibes.

You know "My celibate days are over" You put me straight on the finer points of my speech rehearsed In the mirror of my steamy bathroom Where the lino tells a sorry story in a monologue, in a monologue

I think this song is mostly about the singer himself, but the lyrics are just so specific and evocative that it gives me the mental image of Reigen in that one outro in season one you know.

The chorus reminds me of him too:

Six months on, the winter's gone The disenchanted pony Left the town with the circus boy The circus boy got lonely It's summer and it's sister song's Been written for the lonely The circus boy is feeling melancholy

Lyrics match: 6 Vibes match: 9

THIS IS SO MOB WHEN HE LOSES IT I CAN'T EXPRESS THIS ENOUGH

I'm not the killing type, I'm not, I'm not, I'm not, but I would kill to make you feel! I don't mean kill someone for real! I couldn't do that, it is wrong! but I can say it in a song, a song, and I'm saying it NOW!

Like PLEASE it's so fitting, especially for when he fights Shou's dad.

Also this verse:

I once stepped on a dying bird It was a mercy killing I couldn't sleep for a week I kept feeling its breaking bones

It's. It's so him.

Lyrics match: 10 Vibes match: 8

this whole song just reminds me of Reigen. I'm so annoyed that the little excerpt that Tumblr plays is never The Right Bit but --

...and for once in you're life, you've got nothing to say, and could this be the time, when somebody will come, to say "look at yourself, you're not much use to anyone"?

I just think it fits well as someone who's very confident on the surface but deep down feels a bit pathetic and doesn't know what he's doing.

(that's like my favourite song ever btw, it's so bouncy)

Lyrics match: 9 Vibes match: 8

This one just fits with the lower-stakes parts of the show to me.

Do something pretty while you can, don't be a fool, skating a pirouette on ice is cool

I don't know man, there's just something about it.

Lyrics match: 7 Vibes match: 10

I've skipped some songs out of this because of the audio limit but here's the full playlist if anyone wants to listen to it :D I think I explained all the important ones, the others are probably there for vibes.

Oh yeah and I added "Satellite of Love" onto the end because it reminded me of the aliens lmao... I might take it off though because "We Rule the School" feels like such a good one to finish on and idk where I would put Satellite of Love to get the flow right