#this is obviously a generalization and not an argument

[cassolotl]

Time for a late night post-migraine ramble!

I wonder about this scenario as well, and about how it *should* play out even in our current sexist society. How I unfold it in my head is like this:

If there's a cisgender woman who has trauma that means she can't undress around people who look like men, that's basically PTSD or similar, which is an anxiety disorder.

In the UK at least, we have the Equality Act 2010, which requires organisations to provide "reasonable adjustments" to people with disabilities, and disability has a specific but quite broad and inclusive definition that totally includes things like long-term mental illnesses such as anxiety disorders.

But the reasonable part of reasonable adjustments comes into play here. When I imagine a cisgender woman with an anxiety disorder attempting to use a changing room...

Let's say she's arachnophobic and there's a spider in the changing room, I'm sure it would be reasonable for a member of staff to remove the spider, because it doesn't cost anything and it's quick and easy and the spider probably shouldn't even be there anyway. But if she had a phobia about other people's nudity, the staff would probably be like, "yeah it's a communal changing room, you might well see naked people in there, there's not a lot we can do about that." Let's say she takes the leisure centre to court for being in breach of the Equality Act 2010, and the courts would deem it unreasonable for the cisgender woman to ask the leisure centre to build a whole private changing room with direct access to the pool just for her. (The court might suggest that when they remodel they consider installing private changing rooms or cubicles in addition to the communal changing rooms, but they wouldn't enforce it.) The staff could go out of their way to ask other swimmers to try to cover up more in the changing room, or to allow a solo swimming session, or to host a "very covered up changing room" session, but that would be very generous of the leisure centre and not expected.

Ultimately, the mental illness that is preventing the woman from using changing rooms would be the responsibility of the woman, not people around her. Similarly,

If a swimmer who was agoraphobic asked for a solo swimming session, they probably wouldn't get it, or they would be asked to pay a very high fee to hire the whole pool.

If a cisgender woman felt anxious in women's changing rooms because she was assaulted by a woman, she would not be able to expect the leisure centre to remove all the other women from the changing room.

If a cisgender woman felt anxious getting undressed around people who were taller than her, and while she was getting undressed someone taller walked in, she wouldn't be entitled to ask the tall person to leave.

All of the arguments that people use about trans women not being allowed in changing rooms really all end up in the same place for me.

If you feel it's undignified for you to undress around someone who looks male to you in a place that you go into voluntarily, don't do that.

If you have PTSD from a sexual assault, which would obviously negatively impact your life in a lot of ways, that's awful and you have my sympathy, and you can ask for adaptations from others and/or make uncomfortable adaptations to your life and/or seek treatment and recovery.

If you just think that people who have or used to have penises are inherently more dangerous and you don't see a problem with that, that's fine and all you can really do is avoid half the population.

If you think genitals are disgusting or offensive you have bigger problems and you should probably also avoid places where people's genitals might be incidentally visible, like changing rooms and also art galleries and such.

Obviously if someone comes into a changing room and they're doing something antisocial or harmful, yes, they should stop or leave. The staff can remove them, you can call the police... Anything that an evil trans woman might do to a cisgender woman in a women's changing room is already illegal, and would be illegal if a cisgender woman did it too. The only way keeping trans women out of women's changing rooms would be an appropriate and preventative response to this is if trans women were inherently, universally and inevitably dangerous to cisgender women, which is to say... they're robots/animals with no control over their behaviour. It is ridiculous that I feel like I should point out how absurd this is.

[The way TERFs talk about trans women, it really seems like they believe this to be the case. I would put this in the "anxiety disorder" category myself, which is not to say it's not based in reality - anxiety disorders form within societal norms and systems and life events, and you don't have to look very hard to see how often women are assaulted by men and how often the men get away with it while the victims suffer if they try to get justice. The belief is understandable, and it is also disproportionate and life-impairing. And, for example, I also think that gender-neutral changing rooms would seem a lot less scary to a lot of women if there was any confidence whatsoever that sexual assault in a changing room (by anyone of any gender) would result in arrests and punishments with minimal harm to the victim.]

I can imagine that to many people this is going to sound like victim-blaming, and I do think there should be more accommodations and more compassion for people with PTSD. For most people taking your clothes off around strangers does make you feel a lot more vulnerable, the "people of all genders use your bathroom at home and you have no problem with that" argument doesn't fly with me, and those vulnerable communal spaces should be made safer regardless of gender inclusivity/exclusivity. Toilet cubicles and changing cubicles are kind of barbaric when it's fairly easy to build them to be and feel safer! If you get a lot of reports about sexual assaults in your changing rooms, install small rooms with locks and/or hire an attendant!

But.

When a victim of sexual assault who has PTSD complains because a trans woman is in the women's changing rooms and in this case the Equality Act 2010 requires the leisure centre to make a reasonable adjustment and the leisure centre can provide an alternative changing room for someone, the staff should not ask the trans woman to use the alternative changing room. The trans woman has done nothing to warrant this. The staff should offer the alternative changing room to the person with PTSD.

If you are afraid that a total stranger in your vicinity is going to do a sex crime when you've had no interactions with them whatsoever and they haven't done anything obviously suspicious, even if it's because of a disability (e.g. mental illness following previous sex crime), that's a you problem.

the idea that restrooms, locker rooms, etc need to be single-sex spaces in order for women to be safe is patriarchy's way of signalling to men & boys that society doesn't expect them to behave themselves around women. it is directly antifeminist. it would be antifeminist even if trans people did not exist. a feminist society would demand that women should be safe in all spaces even when there are men there.

[buskingalbatross]

AmazingPhil channel marathon musings

during a pre-show q&a back in november, in response to a question about what show someone should binge next, dan said they should watch all of the AmazingPhil channel from the start. I was not the person who asked this (nor was I at this show), but regardless I did decide I wanted to take dan’s suggestion seriously. just a few days ago, I finished watching all of AmazingPhil in chronological order. and now i really want to talk about what it was like and why I would recommend marathoning his channel to pretty much anyone—because it was a blast.

I watched all of the 369 currently public AmazingPhil videos over the course of 35 days, which is from my perspective a pretty casual marathon. 369/35 = roughly 11 videos a day, though due to algorithm and monetization policy stuff, phil’s videos became longer in duration around 2015-2016; for many years, most of his videos were around 4 minutes long or less, which for me meant that early on in this marathon I was watching more videos per day, and then later on my pace slowed. phil’s videos with dan are usually pretty long as well, so if I had something like a baking video or wdapteo up next to watch, I might have only watched one or two videos that day. 

unsurprisingly, watching all of phil’s videos in order in a relatively short span of time gave me a really cool perspective on how phil has grown as a person and as a YouTuber over the past eighteen years. surprising to me, though, was how I felt like watching his channel in such a linear way felt a bit like coming to know who phil is for the very first time, again. despite having watched his videos for over a decade, i feel like i understand his style and creativity and personality more fully, and in general better, than I did before. watching 2007 phil become 2009 phil become 2011 phil and so on in the span of a few days or a week meant seeing clearly how his sense of humor evolved, how his editing and creativity developed, how his perspectives on life and relationship with his audience shifted. much as when you binge an entire tv or book series and immediately afterwards feel like you’re brimming with information, and have all the context, that’s sort of how I felt. and it was new for me because I’d never done that with phil’s content before—I’d never followed the course of his life the way you might a fictional character’s. 

AmazingPhil is also an incredible capsule of 2000s, 2010s, and 2020s Western internet culture, obviously. it’s like an anthropologist from the future with a very hyperspecific thesis topic’s dream treasure horde. what a person can learn about one corner of the world, and one corner of society, from AmazingPhil’s videos is, well, a lot. I see so much cultural value in AmazingPhil, it’s insane. his videos are not sketches, essays, and commentaries on society and life like Dan’s, but I’d make the argument (as I’m sure most of you would) that they’re just as important and critical to helping people understand themselves and the world they live in. and the kind of people they want to be, too, perhaps.

there were also certain videos that stuck with me more than they had in the past. I discovered new favorite videos and videos that I considered more interesting than I previously had. (I tried just now to make a list of some of these but it rapidly got too long, so instead I’ll restrict myself to mentioning only one, a new favorite, from 2021: “I Got Catfished.” - which i think is a fantastic example of phil’s storytelling style). dnp have both said before that they view life as a performance – and phil is without a sliver of doubt a magical and incredible performer. he knows so well how to tell stories with words, pacing, structures, and effects that are hilarious and entertaining; he turns anecdotes from his life into these amazing whimsical pieces of art made in a way no other person has ever made things. YouTube has from the beginning presented him with the perfect way to be creative in a way that suits him. and more than that, i found that it was never even remotely unpleasant to watch his videos every day for over a month. there is simply not an AmazingPhil video that doesn’t bring me joy and make me sit there smiling like a fool. my cheek muscles are probably stronger than they were 35 days ago. 

so, to you I say, go: watch all of AmazingPhil, draw your own conclusions from his current oeuvre and deepen your parasocial relationship with Phil Lester in ways you cannot yet comprehend. I really recommend. 

(final notes: one side effect of watching all of phil’s videos was being unexpectedly yet thoroughly convinced he does indeed possess psychic talents. even though i don’t believe in magical anything, i do now believe phil lester inherited prescience from his grandmother.) 

(also dan is completely right that every time phil changes his hair, he regenerates into an entirely new man.)

(also also I made an AmazingPhil spotify playlist that is highly specific to my music tastes but that anyone is welcome to listen to all the same) ✨🐗💙🥱

[cz19y]

COOKIE ! [One Shot]

ITOSHI RIN × GN!Reader

THEME: Rin mad at your irresponsible care of your health.

Warnings — Fluff(ew), Reader likes to bake/cook, small argument(no against tho), reader has an attitude, living together, PLATONIC or ROMANTIC, friends/couple still learning, OOC Rin, curses[ofc].

NOTE: This writing is too cringe to my own good, stop reading while you can,, anyways, Happy late Christmas y'all. I'm trying to come back to (my rusty)writing and this dead ahh fandom(blue lock).

NOTE: Tired of reader having those bubbly personalities when they have a hobby in cooking/baking; so I made them have a little of an attitude hah

[ Starting . . . ]

▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬

It wasn't news to Itoshi that you obviously liked to cook and bake — to do something in the kitchen — in general.

Special occasion with special food? You got it. Special sweets just for fun? You already have a whole set of it. Need a hot drink on a winter afternoon? You're making the best hot beverage known to mankind with the simple ingredients that sat on the kitchen shelves.

It wasn't the first time, you didn't understand why he was so angry at you this morning — as you slowly halted your hand middle-way to feeding yourself a fresh out cookie. You blinked, not aware of what’s the big deal of skipping a night of sleep.

“... Want some?” You said, pointing down at the sweet. Turning around to fully face the sourned-mood Itoshi at 7:30 AM on the other side of the isle. “I just decided to bake some cookies, you know? No big deal.” Silence. His frown was more heated than the stove currently.

“Skipping a night just because you didn't feel like sleeping to bake some lukewarm cookies is not a big deal? Are you trying to mess up your sleep schedule again?” His frown only deepened when you rolled your eyes. “Lukewarm your ass, you're gonna enjoy these more than me anyways.” You huffed, filling the silence of the sweet air with your next set of words.

“You used to skip meals before, now if it wasn't for me..” Scoffing, you continued, “Huh, and you have the audacity to scold me when I skip one or two nights! You also spent the whole night out in the field practicing and pushing yourself.”

“...This was in the past. I don't do this anymore—” “—because of me—” “— I changed— “—because of me—” Rin stared at you in a deadpan face, you returned the look. rin made way into your personal space. you stared at him, a twitching eye as he sighted in disappointment, you could preview his next batch of words including the word ‘lukewarm’ and cut him short;

“Shut up, will you.” A cookie being shoved into his mouth made the trick as you had a taste of your own hard work too. Rin begrudgingly complied to eat, your eyes would still not meet his as your hands hovered around to sort the treats into a plate.

“You're being dramatic. Just take care of yourself, or are you too pathetic to do this too?” He leaned on the aisle beside you, annoyed, watching you set up your little stage to have the perfect picture for your series in your socials — which your followers flocked over your cooking skills.. Rin and some of his ‘friends’ included.

Though, making no sign of stopping your classification test for the better good-looking cookies for the picture or giving him a proper answer, you pondered in silence.

You knew of Rin’s soft spot for you, well aware of the privileges this had lent you, compared to the rest of his social group, you were the one of the few people that he would go out of his way to voice his worries. Even if he acted like an ass when doing so, you learned the hard way to be able to have the ability of knowing when he is just concerned.

While you continued, all in Itoshis’ mind was when would you answer. Was he being too much of a nuisance..? you called him out... Too loud maybe. But not only did he just intrude when he just had a treat offered to him, Rin ignored your proud words to make snarky comments. It was almost 8 AM, one thing he learned was that you didn't like to put up with bullshit in the mornings. He lowered his laches, thinking if he crossed something.

A sight made his eyes look at the figure in front of him.

“Alright, alright, I pledge to sleep early tonight. happy?” You gave him a side look, but an honest voice regardless of your small joking tone. Rin made no moves, only glancing at you, before looking away; nevertheless, bathing on his petty victory in his usual quiet tone.

A phone came in sight, ready to add into the collection of your camera roll full of dishes.

“What the-” you stilled, your reaction too slow to immediately react to watching Rin's hand snatch one of the cookies on the plate through the phone screen. “Bastard-” you could only graze his sleeve when he was already out of reach, disappearing to the hall of your shared apartment.

[eccebitch]

historical fiction taking place in ancient rome:

us writers: bad people mistreat their slaves, but good people, who are coincidentally my protagonist(s) and all my favorite historical figures, treat their slaves well

uk writers: is slavery is bad

[tapetum-lucidumb]

So my dad asked if he could follow my Tumblr. I said no (obviously), and also told him he is not ready for Tumblr because his generation is sexually repressed. Then he got REALLY offended, so to prove my point I showed him this post.

I won the argument.

He's saying what we've all been thinking

[lucabyte]

i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.

i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.

anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

Cant sleep so im thinking about ayhalo

I think its like. one sided. qaypierre WOULD smooch that demon and take him on dates. qbad would not recognize anything as a romantic gesture. aypierre could throw a bouquet of chocolate roses at him and bad would just be like ! thank you :}

like they love each other, absolutely. they TRUST each other, to the point where i’d even say it gets in the way of bad seeing aypierre as anything more than a good friend. that’s his guy. The dude always in his corner. Friend resource label: team mate (coparent) (down to help kidnap people). bad doesnt do classic romantic relationships- all of his relationships are INCREDIBLY queer, but the closest he usually gets to what others read as romance is a classic chewtoy4chewtoy dynamic. He LOVES to fuck with people and he loves to get fucked with and if there’s a nice jawline or pretty muscles included?? huge bonus !!

he’s got something- not kinder, with aypierre? not calmer, either, but stable, maybe. pierre has proven, over and over again, that he’s on bad’s side. Spying on tubbo, encouraging bad’s pranks, the kidnapping- i can’t call it a reliable dynamic, not with how paranoid bad is, even when he trusts, but there is still a feeling of understanding that, wherever pierre’s limits are for when he cant support bad (or genuinely turn against him), it hasnt been reached yet

aypierre, on the other hand, i dont know enough about to be absolutely sure but there are some Vibes. ironically, i think hes feeling like his relationships are unreliable. max was going to have their baby, and then he wasnt, and then he left him, then max fucking died. plus whatever is happening with him and ayrobot, which probably leaves him feeling like he cant rely on Himself. like he had, if not a little crush on bad, at least some Interest in him, before. as well as several islanders. i remember the days of the Bed Threat.

but thats part of it, too? because those flings didnt have that emotional connection, and i always got the sense that he started looking for that with maximus, to Love and Be Loved rather than pure lust. To care about someone, genuinely, and be cared about in return. but he didnt get that with the flings, and We know that max was using him, but i dont know if he did, but maybe he had a feeling about it and maybe he also had a feelinf about maximus’ feelings towards bad and maybe- there’s something about that? A little push of not-spite-not-projection onto bad.

because bad IS that reliability, right now. he’s a fucking gremlin. a bastard. a prankster silly guy. he trusts aypierre and aypierre trusts him and they dont share everything but so often, when it comes down to it, it is them against the world. them in the corner, caught, aypierre shouting about kissing as a cover for their crimes while bad runs giggling away from him.

[smileandasong]

i can't stop thinking of the young men that came out for trump and the implications of it. it is super harrowing because, should it continue, gen z is on track to become the first generation to not be more progressive than the one that proceeded it. and typically speaking, you get more conservative as you get older, which is why you see boomers and gen x going for cult maga. and if a significant portion of gen z is on this train too, then literally, what's left for the progressive angle?

[enigmalea]

I absolutely do not think it's impossible for Lucanis to be a virgin, but I do understand some of the skepticism around the announcement that he's suddenly demisexual and an inexperienced virgin.

Let me preface this by saying that I am bi/pan (I don't fuss over labels) and demisexual myself. And of course, no matter what labels people share, everyone's experience is different.

I find Lucanis' writing to be pretty true to a demisexual experience (whether virgin or not) in retrospect. He doesn't seem to realize his desire until it smacks him full-force in the face and then it's overwhelming and he's not sure what to do.

None of that is part of my skepticism. My skepticism is from three things.

The Wigmaker's Job There is a passage in the Wigmaker's Job which hints, admittedly extremely vaguely that Lucanis has taken part in an orgy. (I'm using color here to separate the quote, italics are original to the piece.) Tevinter parties—especially thrown by the altus—were known for their excess. Lucanis still remembered the first gala he had attended in Minrathous. Rows and rows of tables had been overladen with jugs of wine and platters of food from all over Thedas. Retching vases were placed in corners for guests to relieve themselves if they overindulged. Prized slaves were brought out to perform. Acrobats tumbled overhead. Musicians played until their fingers blistered. While hunting his mark, Lucanis had opened the wrong door and walked into an orgy. Getting out of that had been interesting. Now, obviously, this could mean that he was getting out of the orgy without participating. But it could also be interpreted that getting away to finish his contract had required him to participate and the orgy itself was interesting.

Mary Kirby's Posts During the original promotion of Veilguard, Mary Kirby described Lucanis as a "disaster bisexual". Now, obviously, I'm aware that demisexual people can be bi/pan or hetero or gay. But the "demisexual" part typically doesn't fall within the "disaster" part of the description. And most people would assume that a "disaster bisexual" in his thirties is NOT a virgin. Very, very generously, I can see the argument that she maybe meant "disaster biromantic", because Lucanis is certainly that. But I don't think so. I think she meant "disaster bisexual."

The Timing So, where did the "Lucanis is demisexual and a virgin" come from? After the game's release, Lucanis' romance was met with a lot of criticism. It's no secret that Mary Kirby dislikes writing romances, and I think it shows in his romance. It's not necessarily bad, but it wasn't quite what people were expecting from a "disaster bisexual". So when questioned and provided an opportunity to have an explanation, "oh he's demisexual and a virgin!" She went with it.

I mean, maybe I'm wrong and it was intended all along. I kind of hope I am, because like I said, I don't necessarily dislike his romance as a demisexual one. But I absolutely 100% understand the skepticism that it was an intended representation and that Lucanis was intended to be a demisexual virgin all along. And I don't think everyone who's skeptical is acephobic or weird about an adult being a virgin.

A portion of people within this fandom are really letting their discomfort with asexual people and virginity show.

I hate to break it to you, but there are people who make it to adulthood as virgins (and it isn't inherently tied to being religious.).

I need you guys to breathe and be realistic for 5 minutes, and also realize the implications of your exclamation about how impossible you find Lucanis being a virgin is. Maybe it's not within your scope of focus, but yes, it happens.

No, I don't care that he's a Crow. He specifically tells you that seduction is Illario's thing.

Yes, you can read romance and be in love with the idea (and even long for it for yourself!) and still not take that jump.

Sex is not casual for everyone. Casual sex is not for everyone.

Please sit with that before you guffaw and call it impossible.

[anghraine]

yavieriel replied to this post:

I feel like it's an incoherent argument because what they really want to say is "people who are vocal about only reading fanfic are annoying" but they misidentify the cause. Like I think people that only read YA novels are annoying and also I don't like most post-Harry Potter YA, and I think a lot of those people would benefit by diversifying their reading... but when you're annoyed, "oh my god please read a real book" is a snappy put-down.

I partly agree, but I think it goes one step beyond that (at least in the discourse I've seen about it).

People often don't stop at the (unnecessary and inconsistent) snappy put-down. That is, they don't seem to just want to express their annoyance at other people's reading habits (why they think it's their business is beyond me, but w/e). The posts about it keep trying to come up with some serious justification for their writers' annoyance, reasons why it arises out of something higher than personal taste (the importance of reading original work however poorly defined, or reading traditionally published work, or whatever).

So it's like ... People Who Only Read Fanfic Being Annoying on the Internet has to represent a serious social problem. You end up at "reading the kind of stuff I like is actually important to proper intellectual development and developing sophisticated taste" etc etc. But tbh the arguments are so bad that to me it just reads as "I find y'all cringe and I'm going to make it your problem."

[coulsonlives]

Re-reading the comics and I totally forgot how dark they are

[hermithomebase]

the social justice and civil rights movement is fucking dead in the water and it died with teenagers on twitter who have gotten too comfortable in their own circles to wade through bullshit and fight for their fucking rights and respect

[5-htagonist]

-relyng too much on canon when this is about fandom perception. this is about racism in fandom, and how it is mistaken for "ship discourse"

-kabrus discomfort in his dynamic with mithrun is generally ignored whereas with laios its joked about because kabru Puts Himself in that position (there was never a point where he would be in danger for saying monsters make me uncomfortable, nor would it have seemed that way. he specifically wanted to gain laios' favor). sure, you could make the same argument for his situation with mithrun, but i sincerely doubt kabru knew that 1. he was going to live through that fall and 2. that mithrun would need any sort of care.

-also teleportation is inherently dangerous and potentially deadly. mithrun has killed multiple guards with his teleportation. he teleports kabru to use as a meat shield at least once that i can recall. we like to forget that fact.

-kabru is someone who generally cares about humans. of course he is going to come to care for mithrun after a week of getting to know him as a person rather than as a canary.

-everything is viewed through a racial lens it came free with your existence in a racialized society. everyone has and does racist actions and thoughts. obviously, characters of color will get this treatment too. this isnt just kabumisu shippers. kui herself does this to her own characters. think about who gets comforted in the story. i dont think theres a single Kabru Comfort Moment.

-no, fanart/fanfic doesnt define a canon dynamic. however. none of these ships are canon. so fanart/fanfic 100% affects perception of these ships. it shows us what people take away from canon. and a lot of people seem to take away from kabru and mithruns dynamic that kabru is an endlessly patient caretaker with no problems of his own and mithrun is a helpless little guy who needs his mouth wiped after every bite.

-did you miss the friendship confession scene. obviously, being in a really cool political position would be super desirable for kabru. but its directly in the text that kabru wants to understand laios.

-the implication i got from kabru throwing himself and mithrun into the hole wasnt him trying to blackmail mithrun, he was trying to murder suicide. "the rest is up to you now, laios!"

-they are not people they are fictional characters. objects. through which we can examine our own lives, biases, philosophies, and more.

-i would just like for the court to recognize there is a huge difference between being a Royal Advisor to a (white) tallman king who kind of needs you specifically (high position in a royal court. even if that kingdom is a bit rinkydink at the moment) and being a temporary caretaker to a (white) elven imperial soldier, who you need to keep alive and in good health to ensure your own survival.

kabru is always going to be racialized. no matter what ship or dynamic you put him in. sorry. again. it came free with your being born in a racialized society

A healthcare worker’s take on Dungeon Meshi shipping discourse

Hiya y’all! As someone who has become a fan of Dungeon Meshi (honestly one of my favorite franchises at this moment) I’d just like to give more of a nuanced take on a shipping discourse I’ve seen. I’d like to clarify this with I am an NA. I’ve literally been recognized by the country I live in through the sunshine awards system on my contributions to my patients lives. All this to say, I know a bit about healthcare. And I also think that. Personally, people should be allowed to ship whatever they please. They shouldn’t be made to feel guilty for what they enjoy, especially if it isn’t hurting anyone.

I’d like to clarify what I am speaking on, this being the controversy surrounding the ships Mithrun and Kabru, vs Laios and Kabru. Both of which are valid ships in my opinion! I think both are great! And whichever you like you should feel comfortable and happy to indulge in it.

I work mostly with geriatric and bariatric patients, as I work on a cardiac unit. So, by proxy, I witness a lot of disabled people come through. This to say that these people HAVE partners. And their partners care for them. Such as feeding their partners if they need help eating, helping their partners feel safe if they have dementia, I have even seen someone clean their spouse after they had soiled themself. All of which are examples of love and affection, as partners. Not as a provider doing their job.

The argument i see many a time against the ship of Mithrun and Kabru, is that it is unethical. As Kabru would be a “provider” in this case, and Mithrun would be a “patient” to this I say, is Kabru being paid in this hypothetical? Is he following training he has been given? Is he following a code of ethics given to healthcare workers when he helps Mithrun with his disability? Disabled people deserve love. And they deserve a partner that cares for them. So the argument that the ship is gross is kind of… weird. Isn’t it? Again. Mithrun and Kabru as partners do not have to be your cup of tea, but that doesn’t mean that anyone who DOES ship them is gross or immoral. Helping your partner because they are disabled is an act of love, and completely different from a provider helping their patient.

Statistically, everyone will either die able bodied or live to become disabled. It happens to everyone. Disabilities are almost as much of a fact of life as breathing is. I am new to the Dungeon Meshi fandom, but the insinuation that someone able bodied cannot have a disabled partner is kind of horrible to actual able bodied/disabled partnerships? The dynamic is so common, and so to say that it is gross, almost implies that the dynamic in a day to day is gross.

This post isn’t meant to be inflammatory, there are so many dungeon meshi ships I love with all my heart. Some that are rare pairs, some that are common within the fandom. I just think that people should be more friendly with each other. Kabru has two hands guys it’s okay /j /lh. Just please be more friendly guys. Both ships are valid. But the way the fandom gets so angry over it makes me scared. And I imagine it makes other people who are new to the manga/anime a little scared too.

[sexygaywizard]

Me (thinking of a trait shared across several European countries): I dislike that there's so much [X] in Europe

Idiot: Oh my god stop thinking all of Europe is [country I wasn't even thinking of and haven't been to], [singular country] isn't like that

[llycaons]

lying about your identity to win arguments online and justify questionable fanfiction is honestly the natural conclusion that tumblr's specific culture and arguments tend to encourage. like of course this happened. of course it did. it's definitely happened before AND since. someone was unmasked several years ago for rakefacing on here too, tho I don't think it was fanfic related

[sysig]

Don’t let her fool you (Patreon)