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ericshoney · 8 months ago

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Sweetheart ~ Sturniolo Triplets

Warnings: mentions of mental health, coping mechanisms, implied ADHD!Reader, slight innocent!reader, use of pet names (kid, sweetheart, petal, bub) in a platonic way.

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Today you woke up at twelve full of energy. It wasn't unusual for you to wake up as a bundle of joy, but the time you woke was. You usually wake up at around two or three in the afternoon, not twelve.

You had slept in Nick's bed for the night, your own room being too "boring", or that's what you told Nick as you climbed into his bed to sleep. Not that it was unusual, you and Chris both struggled to sleep alone, sometimes you'd both share a bed, giving Nick and Matt a break.

When you woke, you saw Nick still asleep besides you. Not wanting to wake him, you slowly get up and go take a shower, getting ready for the day. After a bit, you heard Nick shout.

"You in the shower, kid?" He called.

"Yeah! Nearly done!" You shouted back.

You heard him mumble an okay before you quickly finished and got out, drying your hair as you walked back into the bedroom, seeing Nick sitting on the bed, scrolling through his phone.

"Morning sweetheart." He said softly.

"Morning, how long was I?" You asked.

"Bout twenty minutes." He answered, making you nod.

Nick then went to shower and get ready as you headed downstairs to the kitchen, seeing Matt and Chris both awake. The two greeted you as you sat on the counter, swinging your legs.

"Your wearing odd socks." Matt mentioned, noticing your pink and blue socks.

"I got bored trying to find a matching pair." You confessed.

"Don't worry, petal. I'll sort it out later." He said with a soft smile. You returned it as Chris started showing you some edits on TikTok.

Nick soon joined the three of you as you then began discussing what you wanted to do for the day. The guys had a pre-filmed video so the day was yours.

"What about Target? Or the park? Or mini golf! Or what about bowling!" You rambled on quickly, making the triplets smile.

"We can do all of them bub, where to first?" Chris replied.

"Umm the park! No bowling! No mini golf! Target! Wait we haven't eaten so food!" You answered quickly.

"Sweetheart, take a deep breath. How about we go to Target, get some food and head to the park first?" Matt suggested calmly.

"Then we can go to mini golf." Nick continued.

"And end the day with bowling." Chris finished.

"Sounds good! Let's go!" You cheered, rushing to the stairs down to the car, the trio laughing softly.

"I'll get her shoes." Chris mentioned, grabbing a pair of your Converse.

By the time the triplets made it to the car, you were already sat in the back having unlocked the car, and playing a game on your phone.

"Bub, your forgetting something." Chris said, as Matt started the car. You looked up and realised he was holding your shoes.

"Oh right." You giggled, slipping them on and putting your feet on Nick's lap, letting him do your laces.

"To Target!" You cheered.

Music began to play as you looked out the window, watching the world go by and before you knew it, you had arrived at Target. The guys got out first before you, something they always did, in case you walked out in front of a car from being distracted.

"I'm gonna get some sour gummy worms!" You said, already excited for the sweet treats.

"Kid, you don't need anymore sugar." Nick said with a laugh. You stuck your tongue out as you all went into the large store.

You all started looking around, grabbing some stuff you wanted for now or later, Chris grabbed a large case of Pepsi saying he was running low, but you knew there were at least ten cans in the fridge. You then drifted away from the guys, a few fidget toys grabbing your attention.

~~~~

As you looked at the different toys, Nick, Matt and Chris started to panic, not seeing you by their side. The trio were protective over you and knew you didn't like being alone, so losing you in a large store wasn't good.

"She was just here!" Matt exclaimed.

"Where would she go?" Chris questioned.

"There!" Nick shouted, pointing out your small figure by the end of the toy aisle. You had a good handful of fidget toys now.

The three rushed over to you as you looked up at them with a sheepish smile. Knowing you made them panic.

"I got distracted..." You mumbled, holding the fidget toys.

"It's okay, petal, but tell us next time. Or grab one of us." Matt said gently, running a hand through your hair.

"Yeah bub, we don't wanna lose you in Target." Chris added.

"We're not mad." Nick reassured you, knowing you were thinking that.

"Okay! But look at these! They light up too!" You cheered, showing the brothers the toys you found. They smiled, knowing you were happy.

"We'll get all of them, sweetheart." Nick said, taking them to hold, in case anything else caught your interest.

You smiled wide as you all continued shopping before heading off to the park. The guys cherished days like this with you, knowing you'd get a lot of your energy out and be extra happy.

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dwntwn-strnlo · 3 months ago

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friendly fire. [m.st.]

── ⟡˙ ̟ matthew sturniolo x !reader

↳ synopsis. — drunk confessions!

↳ a/n. — thank you to the talented @sarosfilms for letting me use this idea! ella is so freaking creative and you should definitely check out her work :))

↳ requested? — no

↳ cw. — use of alcohol, verbal argument

you tilted your head back, beer spilling out of the red solo cup and past your lips. every reasonable nerve in your body was telling you that it's okay, no big deal. it was fine.

but yet, as your knuckles gripped the trashy plastic, you couldn't tell what emotion you were feeling. whether it was sadness, or anger—no. infuriation. you honestly couldn't tell.

eyes locked on your boy best friend, you want to absolutely lose your shit.

leaning against the wall, matt talks to a pretty girl. the way she's watching him speak, gaze glued to his lips and the way you fell in love with his smile? it made you want to burst into tears.

downing the rest of you stale alcohol, you turn around and toss your cup in the trashcan by the dishwasher. closing your eyes for a mere few seconds, you breathe. in through your nose, out through your mouth. trying to compose yourself and cope with the idea that it's just matt. friendly, easy to talk to matt. and he's not going to do anything that would remotely hurt you.

but why, oh why— did you feel like you were going insane?

when you realized that you were falling way past the silly schoolgirl crush for him, the idea of commitment bit you in the ass. though eventually, you wrapped your head around it and now you're head over fucking heels for the goofy influencer who's face haunts your insta feed.

by the time you open your eyes again, your heart is pounding. you weren't one to be so jealous and angry,—if that's even what your feeling right now—especially over a stupid little conversation with a stupid little tiktoker with stupidly big tits. so you have no clue what's gotten into you. besides maybe the 7 cups of beer you've downed in the last hour...

you pull out your phone, needing to get away before you actually lost your head.

you send a quick text to matt in the awkward case you were to get roofied or jumped or whatever frat/influencer thing the guys decide to do, that he'd at least know where you were. no matter how upset you were.

he's quick to react to your text, but you chose not to elaborate before shoving your phone back into your pocket and step outside.

immediately you feel a rush of relief wash over you when the pounding music is no longer rattling your brain, and now just bleeding through the front door.

quickly you wrap your arms around your torso, the night time air hitting you like a brick. closing your eyes again, you breathe in and out. in and out. in and out. trying to steady your keonigsegg of a heartbeat.

now that you're alone and away from the half naked dancing, sweating young adults, you can finally focus. and you soon realize how absolutely full of rage you are.

you want to scream and cry and-

"y/n?" you turn around to your name being called as the glass door slides against the rusty metal. "what are you doing out here?"

matt quirks a brow as he speaks, staring at you with confusion and concern stapled across his face.

"i uh-" you cover your mouth with your palm. trying to figure out what to say. you wanted to blow up at him, but you couldn't do that. he's just matt. just your friend. just your friend that your madly in love with. who cares? "no reason?"

the boy scoffs, knitting his brows as he looks at you in disbelief, "really?"

your eyes rake over his body as you search for something to say. noting how he's in just a simple black tee and baggy designer jeans. "who was the girl?" i snort, "she was really pretty!"

matt's eyes widen, still seemingly shocked by what your going on about. "huh? what girl?" he stuffs his hands in his pockets, shifting on his heels and the balls of his feet. "i wasn't talking to anyone."

you scoff, "i'm not stupid." crossing my arms over my chest. "i saw you talking to her, matt. blonde, big tits, you remember?"

he laughs, but there's not much humor in it. "you can't say shit like that."

"oh so you do remember, hm?" you bite, narrowing your eyes at him.

he puts his hands up defensively, waving them in the air between the two of you. "that was nothing. she was no one."

"you weren't nobody to her." you snort. "did you not see the way she was all goo goo ga ga over you? she was bout ready to flash her colorful feathers and do a mating dance."

"why do you care?" matt mirrors your body language, crossing his arms over his chest too.

your heart skips a beat or two... hundred. your face freezes at his words, and suddenly you're a deer in headlights. "because... i'm your friend matt."

"friend!?" he fires out, barely letting your words roll of your tongue. he looks exasperated, his blue eyes dark and wide.

his swords send you into a string of confusion. raising a brow at him, you snicker. "why are you so shocked?"

"because i love you, y/n."

what?

"yeah i love you too?" you mumble, uncrossing your arms.

matt scoffs. he scoffs. and it makes you even more exasperated then you were before. "are you fucking stupid?" the words make you rebuild the wall in your body, crossing your arms again and standing up a little taller. "i love you." he mutters again. this time unable to hold eye contact with you.

undeniably your breath hitches. this time as he says it, the words hit you a little harder. pressing into you like a body blow, threatening to knock you off your feet. "i don't understand.." you mumble, voice barely above a whisper as you swallow the lump in your throat.

"you are not my fucking friend, y/n. you are the person i aspire to be the most." he reaches out a hand to touch you, but drops it almost instantly. as if his body wasn't with his mind. "i want you so bad. i want to take you out and hold your hand and-" his breath hitches, eyes boring into yours.

as his words slip off his tongue everything seems to hit you like a train. "and what?" your voice cracks. as he finally goes silent, you realize your biting at your nails. picking recklessly at the skin around them. dropping your hand, your fingers fidget, waiting and waiting and waiting.

"i wanna be your boyfriend."

TAGLIST

@thetriplets3 @stxrniqlo @ifilwtmfc @iha8you @20nugs @gracietaylorsversions @fenoy7 @mlimmm @prettysturniolo @ssturniolo @gabbylovesreading @oh-toseewithoutmy-eyes @matthewmurdockswife @jellybeanbby @slaysturniolo @iheartshifting @mxqdii @luvsturniolo @lvrsparadise @partoftoofuckinmanyfandoms @sstvrniololuvr

#harley can't stfu ★#matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo #matthew sturniolo #matthew sturniolo angst #matt sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo x reader #matt stuniolo fanfic #matthew sturniolo x reader

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izzabela · 5 months ago

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Mortal Kombat Headkanons

in which i talk about certain characters

a/n: the success of my short!fem!reader x bi han canons made me want to make a couple of hcs for some of my other favorite characters

ship[s]: none

warning(s): bi!johnny?

Johnny:

- he misses his wife. more than words could say

- he doesn't prolong the divorce, signing the papers and immediately giving her the required settlement without issue

- Johnny and kung lao definitely have drinking competitions. like, they drink to see who can handle more (Kung Lao often loses and pays Johnny)

- Johnny talks to kenshi about his divorce, a lot (does it count as talking if he wakes up next to him in bed?)

- Johnny does really good research when he's creating his mortal kombat cinematic universe. like, really good research. i know the kanon end for him is a director, but if you really examine that clip, it's incredible how much thought he put into this

- you know how johnny tells tomas that if he wins their spar he gets a part? i think even if tomas lost, he'd still give him the part

- Johnny takes up journaling as a coping mechanism. i'd say that it would've been introduced to him by Raiden, but he uses it to vent about his PTSD in Shang Tsung's lab

Raiden:

- i believe Raiden reassures Kung Lao a lot. we know that Kung Lao often is compared to Raiden, but it never affects Kung Lao in a negative way- and i think it's because of how kind Raiden is

- he hypes Kung Lao up in different ways, and Kung Lao takes them as genuine compliments

- Raiden. loves. hugs. no, i won't be taking criticisms

- a part of me thinks Raiden does have a twisted darkness to him, remained untapped of course because of how Liu Kang made him. i headcanon that this darkness grows bit by bit when he trains with the Shirai Ryu

- speaking of the Shirai Ryu, Hanzo definitely has taken a liking to Raiden. if Hanzo looks at Takeda like an older brother, and Tomas maybe as an uncle/father figure, Raiden is def another older brother

- i think Raiden dotes on his sister a lot. he definitely takes good care of her, always praising her and patting her head and whatnot. he does the same to Hanzo for sure

- Raiden still visits Fengjian to help with chores. no, i won't be taking any criticisms on this

Kung Lao:

- as mentioned above, Kung Lao doesn't have a hating bone in his body for Raiden because Raiden himself keeps him grounded

- however, i still think Kung Lao struggles with identity issues. i think he has days where he really thinks about him and Raiden, and how Raiden is branded as the "better version" of him

- Kung Lao is a cuddle bug. no, i will not be taking any form of criticism at all on this take

- for some reason, I can see Kung Lao making wordplay jokes. i'm filipino, and wordplay is a huge thing in our culture and humor, and I'm pretty sure the Chinese language dabbles in good wordplay humor as well

- Kung Lao absolutely plays boardgames. i can see him introducing Johnny, Kenshi, and the other monks to games he and Raiden played when they were younger

- if Kung Lao had a phone, he'd so be into memes, dank memes, tiktok memes, and the gen z slang business. i can hear him say "i fw that heavy" or the other stuff that's been trending. i'm so bold as to say his favorite type of meme might be vine humor

- i think Kung Lao is an only child. idk, y'all can debate me on this one

Kenshi Takahashi:

- he sends letters to Suchin. since she's still part of the yakuza, and he against, he can't exactly be near her. he writes in great detail, and he'll even send a picture or sketches for Suchin as a visual aid

- i think pre-blindess, Kenshi would have been a major sketcher. he wouldn't be really good at it, but he'd create amazing (and quick) scenery stills of different places he's been to

- Kenshi is such a good listener. no, i'm not trying to be funny since he's blind- i really believe he listens well and gives good advice

- Kenshi would so fight with Takeda. just like how Raiden and Kung Lao fought to settle their bets, those two would also duel

- part of me imagines Kenshi waking up early for training. i think he'd train the best with Raiden, then Kung Lao, then Johnny. i'd go as far to say that Kenshi likes Raiden's company post-spars

- post-blind Kenshi most definitely deals with PTSD, no doubt. he and Johnny talk about it, and I'd like to say both he and Johnny developed insomnia and stay up to talk over the phone

- i hc that Johnny goes to Japan to do research for a "Kenshi Takahashi" solo film, and that he takes Kenshi with him to act as a tour guide and a cultural master (pls go look at @/heyachow on IG! she draws MK1 art and there is a JohnShi post that pertains to this idea)

- he's confused on how he feels for both johnny and suchin

Geras:

- as a fandom, we do not talk about this man enough

- as much as Geras is a loyal follower, i'd like to think that there are times he does doubt Liu Kang. however, when a kanon event comes to pass, his faith in him is restored and he continues with life

- i know Liu Kang said that Geras isn't one for social calls, but i can't shake the feeling that Geras does pop into the Fire Temple for tea. Liu Kang 100% put him on it too (ginseng tea would be Geras's favorite)

- there's a voice-line of Geras and Takeda talking about the dinosaur's extinction, but i think i get why Geras would be traumatized over that. i think he sees it aslife being wiped out in the blink of an eye, and since he was part of the process in creation of it, he feels guilty

- Geras would give firm handshakes if he wasn't so opposed to mortals. you can all argue with the wall on this take

- when Geras talks to others and they ask about their futures or pasts, the people like Tomas, Tanya, or even Takeda make him sad because he (once again) feels responsible. of course, it's part of the course of their fates, but he looks at them a little longer compared to others

- since Geras would be the Keeper of Time after Liu Kang, i think he likes to use the hourglass to view his favorite memories of his friends (though he does not call them friends)

- this might be a fanon, but Geras absolutely makes sand sculptures when he gets uber bored

Liu Kang:

- i think the characters misinterpret the intention Liu Kang had for the timeline. his whole purpose was to make it so that humans had free will to create their own destinies and endings- choose your own adventure

- i think Liu Kang beats himself up from time to time when thinking over the paths of certain people. Bi Han, Tomas, Shang Tsung, even General Shao, he thinks of these people and wonders if he could have made better choices in terms of their lore and origins

- i know it's canon that Liu Kang wishes he made Johnny more humble, but damn do i believe he really regrets it at times. like, he'll openly talk about it to people like Raiden, or Kung Lao

- speaking of them, he looks at his pupils and sometimes sees the visages of his former mentor and best friend. he's content with his life as the protector of Earthrealm, but can a man dream

- Liu Kang would absolutely use the Hourglass to see his Kitana again. i'm not entirely sure how that works, but i imagine you can use it to see into the other timelines as the flow of time continues. he'd smile fondly at the image of his love training her pupils

- this plays into the Geras tea headcanon, but Liu Kang would absolutely (and proudly) ask for Geras to join him for tea. instead of talking, though, they'd sit in silence- a comfortable one

- since Liu Kang's ending in the game means he is no longer immortal, but will live rather long, i imagine him to be scared of losing his life. in previous timelines, he's died and resurrected, but this time it's permanent. that is what scares him

Sindel:

- she's the epitome of "i won't apologize, but here's a bowl of your favorite fruits"

- as she watches over her daughters through Ermac's eyes, she most definitely regrets the harshness she had towards Mileena. though she cannot personally come through Ermac due to the amount of souls it houses, Jerrod tells Mileena for her

- this might borderline fanon, but i think the reason Sindel chose blue and red/maroon for Kitana and Mileena was because blue+red=purple. kind of poetic in a sense, that her daughters make up who she is as a woman, mother, and a queen

- when Li Mei is seen through Ermac's eyes, Sindel cries. she can't hug her friend anymore, and she most definitely can't give her the proper apology she deserves after her years of mistreatment against her

- Sindel hates spicy food. idk, she just looks like she does

- Sindel definitely knew that Mileena was a lesbian before Mileena could even name it. i'd like to think she knew when Mileena shaved her head like that when she was maybe 8000 years old?

- Sindel was definitely proud of Mileena with her stance on Tarkatans and people infected with Tarkat. she definitely regrets how she treated them, and her hypocrisy, especially since they had the power to provide people with a semi-cure

Shang Tsung:

- there's a voice-line on Shang Tsung and another character saying that he was actually doing research on Tarkat and finding a cure. while the characters don't believe him (i don't blame them), i actually believe that he was doing good

- part of me still believes he brews his potions and experiments with Tarkat remedies on that island he found

- Shang Tsung is a cat guy. wave your pitch forks all you want

- Shang Tsung looks like the type of guy to visit his old home just to burn it down. with his fire powers, he absolutely would watch his childhood home burn until it became nothing but ash

- i think Shang Tsung would take leisure walks. if he's in a village, he'll take precaution to shift into a different form, but he will still make time out of his day to take a walk

- he has stacks upon stacks upon stacks upon stacks of journals and scrolls on medicine

General Shao:

- i think there are times where Shao does regret turning against the crown. his military lineage and history, and all the lessons he'd been indoctrinated with make him think like that sometimes, especially since his father had watched him overcome his illness

- i think Shao is ticklish at his horns

- Shao views Reiko like a son. he'll take care of him personally when he is sick or injured

- Shao likes nightly walks

- Shao would absolutely fuck with spicy food

- before Shao was on the run, he snuck back into his family home to grab his father's heirloom. i don't know what it would be, but it would be important enough for him to take from you

Tanya:

- if she misses a day of prayer/temple days, she is visibly dejected

- Tanya absolutely writes love notes to Mileena. sometimes it accidentally gets sent to Kitana, and she receives response notes along the lines of "please, get a room"

- she's the type of girl to stick by the schedule, and it's not just because she is Umgadi. i believe her personality to be "stick to the books", always following the rules (except for Mileena of course)

- the sisters know Tanya is jealous when they spar against her. Tanya would see Mileena on a date with a potential suitor and she'd take it out on the sparring field

- Tanya visits Li Mei for coffee or a meal. it serves as both making new friends and repairing bridges

- i think Tanya is a clean freak. you guys can talk to the hand on this take

Kitana:

- since Kitana is now a movie lover, of course she's excited when Johnny and his film crew are in the palace. she definitely asks questions on what the cameras do, what the clapperboard is, and what the editors do

- i think Kitana was a crier growing up. i could see a little Kitana telling Mileena that someone called her ugly, and Mileena would sock that idiot's face in without wavering

- Kitana and Mileena used to be close, and Kitana does whatever she can to always remind Mileena that she does love and support her

- Kitana thinks about Raiden. if she gets lucky with Mileena's schedule, she talks to her about her feelings towards him. usually it ends up with Kitana denying her feelings about him

- Kitana is a mama's girl

- Kitana secretly wishes the best for Tanya and Mileena. in public, she cannot say anything about their relationship. in private, though, she'll talk to Mileena about all the little thing she saw going on between them

=====================

and that's a wrap for that hc list

i got eight reqs i havent started, and three finished lined up in the queue, you guys are so sweet!

i can't wait to keep writing, and i'll see yall in the next fic!

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mirage-aera · 1 year ago

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•°. *࿐ Five stages of grief | TF141 + König + Keegan

ᴺᴼᵂ ᴾᴸᴬᵞᴵᴺᴳ : Reflections - The Neighbourhood

Synopsis: How the boys will cope with your death after a mission gone wrong following the five stages of grief, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance.

Word count: 2.099

Masterlist

Inspired by an acting challenge @ simplyagh0st has created on tiktok, check him out he does great content if you haven't!

"falling just as hard, I'd rather lose somebody than use somebody"

Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley has gone through so much hurt already. He promised himself that he wouldn’t let anyone close to his heart, and just rip it out again. But once you came along and managed to tear down his walls, he made a vow to himself to keep you safe, to make sure he doesn’t have to go through loss, again.

During the mission, your position gets overwhelmed by enemies. Backup is only a couple of minutes away. The team is split up, you are together with Simon, fighting off waves of enemies. Simon has unknowingly turned his back on an enemy while trying to help you. You’re his priority and he discards his own safety. You see the barrel of the gun facing his back. Not saying a word, you run up to him and turn him around. Not expecting the movement, he easily moves with you. Effectively swapping places with you. The shot rings out and pierces you through the heart. You start collapsing to the floor. He manages to catch you before you meet the ground. He pulls his pistol out of the holster and shoots the enemy with no hesitation.

He sets your body down on the floor gently. Your backup arrives and helps Simon clear out the enemies. As he looks at the dead bodies around him, he can’t help but stare at you. He’s a seasoned soldier. He knows you are dead and that nothing can help you.

As days go on without you by his side, slowly his misery turns into anger. He hates the fact that you put yourself in front of a bullet that was meant for him. He hates the fact that he failed to protect you. He hates that he got so distracted with keeping enemies away from you that he failed to notice the enemy pointing a gun at him. He hates that he let his walls down again, and let someone break his heart again. He gets colder by the day, not giving a damn for anyone or anything. He’s on a mission, to kill every single person involved in that mission that’s on the other side of your guns. He may have failed in protecting you, but he’ll be damned if he fails at this too.

"I see my reflection in your eyes.."

John ‘Soap’ MacTavish can’t believe how much of a fuck up he is. He promised you, that whenever you are around him. He’ll keep you safe. No matter what. So when he sees your empty eyes staring up at him. He can’t help but feel so guilty. He’s used to seeing his reflection in your eyes. Eyes that were so full of life, and now they’re lifeless. All because he broke his promise to you. He just stares at your body in shock. One second you were fine, even joking around with him. The next second you’re gone and he failed to protect you.

They had to drag him off of your dead body. When they put a white sheet over you, that’s when he finally stopped fighting. He had no other choice than to accept you’re dead. He wouldn’t leave your side. Even at death. He’s locked himself up in his room after getting discharged. Price said he’s a liability and that he should take some time off. But really all it did was shut him off even more. He feels so alone in your shared bedroom. Once full of laughter are now fleeting memories. He spends his day in bed, reminiscing and crying. He wants to be angry, he wants to avenge you. But he’s just so goddamn tired. His reflection staring back at him through your lifeless eyes will forever haunt him.

The only time he leaves the house is to visit you. Even then, your cheerful Johnny is no more. He just stares at your tombstone in sadness, remorse, and regret. He thinks about all of the what-ifs. He knows you would hate to see him like this, but he feels like he has no other option. His light was and always will be you. Someone has taken his light away, and the tunnel is now a dark and lonely one

"we were too close to the stars, I never knew somebody like you"

Kyle ‘Gaz’ Garrick has never expected the mission to go so awry. If anything, it was supposed to be one of the easier missions that the Task Force had to endure. So when he stares at you, lying limp on the cold hard ground. One thought is speeding through his mind. ‘No no no, she’s not dead. She can’t be dead.” Even though the signs are there, you are clinically dead. You aren’t breathing, heart stopped pumping the instant the explosion went off. Eyes staring blankly up at the sky. He rushes to you and reassures you as if you’re still alive.

“Hey, hey just keep your eyes open baby. Help is on the way.”

“You’ll be okay, you’re stronger than them.”

“Just hold on, you’re fine baby. It’s just a bruise.”

He repeats these things, both to you and him. As long as he can reassure himself that you are okay and still ‘alive’, everything will be alright. Despite the blood staining his clothes and covering his hands. He refuses to believe you are dead. Not when you are one of the most important people in his life if not the most important. You’re supposed to grow old and die together. Not abruptly by an explosion, not on the job. He has never met someone like you, someone so caring and kind-hearted. You’re a special one and he knows it.

Even as the medics put you on a stretcher and placed a white sheet over your body. Even when they pronounced you dead. He refuses to listen to them. Even when your casket gets lowered into the ground as they give you an honorary send-off. When they forced him to attend your funeral so that he won't regret it later. He still believes you are alive. Sometimes he can hear you call out to him, telling him you love him and that he should move on from you. On a few rare occasions, he swears he sees you standing before him. Or amongst the team on a briefing. And when he informs the team that you have returned, they just stare at him in pity. And repeat what they have been saying for weeks. “She’s dead and isn’t coming back.”

"(tell me you see it too..)"

John Price is a seasoned soldier. He has seen many things, things that he’d rather have not seen. But to keep the world clean, someone has to get their hands dirty. During his whole military, he has seen many comrades die, good people that didn’t deserve to die. Once he became captain he made sure that every one of his fallen brothers and sisters would get a proper and honorable send-off.

You are not an exception. Once he got the news that you’ve been KIA’d. His whole world stopped before it started turning again. His team needs him to be level-headed, not an emotional wreck. He can let his emotions out later in private. They retrieve your body from the field and bring it home. As you lay in the chopper, lifeless. He stares at you both in sadness and frustration. He knows you aren’t coming back. He’s frustrated that he couldn’t save you. Your eyes are still open, staring blankly back at him. He sighs as he closes your eyes, not bearing to see his reflection in your eyes. A reminder that he failed you, both as a partner and captain.

He was there during every step of the send-off. He made sure everything was perfect and that nothing could go wrong. You deserve to rest in peace. As the casket goes down, he can’t help but feel slightly peaceful as he watches you get lowered. He’s there until midnight, talking endlessly with your tombstone. Until he’s forced to leave you, so he can prepare for his next mission. Dealing with the bastards, and everyone involved that took you from him.

‘At least she’s free from the horrors of this world.’ He thinks to himself. From now on, he’ll strive to keep the world clean. So that you can forever lay one with the earth in peace. It’s the least he could do for you now that you can’t do it yourself. Maybe one day he’ll join you. But for now he’s content with the fact you no longer have to suffer.

"maybe it's a blessing in disguise?"

König has been spiralling since that mission, the mission where you did not return like you said you would. He regrets sending you on that mission for KorTac. He unknowingly sent you on a suicide mission. The worst part is, they never found your body. It makes him sick to think about what happened to it. He hates the way he can’t even put you to proper rest, where you want to be buried if something were to happen. He rereads the mission file over and over. He thinks that maybe, just maybe, he could’ve seen it coming from a mile away and perhaps he could’ve warned you. But the times he rereads it he realizes that there was nothing that could’ve been done for you. Every outcome would’ve likely ended with you dying. It revolts him to think he sent you to your death.

Your shared home feels so cold and lonely without your presence. He takes care of the garden for you, he waters your indoor plants. You always made him a fruit salad while he worked in his office. So he does it himself. But instead of using his favourite fruits, he makes them with your favourite. Hoping that one day, you’ll come home and join him, sharing a fruit salad together as you used to do. He heads to the cemetery daily, where your empty casket is buried. Sometimes, he’ll come with a small bowl of fruit salad.

“I’ve got your favourites, meine Taube.”

“Bitte, come home. Your plants miss you, I can’t take care of them as well as you do.”

“I wish I never sent you on that verdammt mission.”

As he speaks softly to your tombstone, a white dove perches on top of it. He looks at it as it reminds him of you. He watches as the dove takes your favourite fruits from the bowl and eats it. Eventually, it picks up the pieces of his favourite fruit and drops them on his hand. He chuckles lightly, “welcome home, Liebe.”

"falling just as hard, I'd rather lose somebody than use somebody"

Keegan Russ was already torn with the death of Ajax. But when Rorke did the same to you. His whole world crumbled. When they found out Rorke had a kill list for the Ghosts. He made a vow to himself to keep you safe, no matter what. So when Rorke captured you, he was furious. But he still had confidence in getting you back home to him. He was so close, yet so far. He realizes it’s a repeat of what happened to Ajax. That just spurred him on more to get you back faster.

But when he came face to face with Rorke. He spots your limp body behind Rorke. Oh, he so wanted to wipe that smirk off of his face, but his priority is you first and foremost. “What did you do?!” Keegan screams out in rage. When that smirk got wider, he was so tempted to put a bullet in between his eyes right there and then. “I crossed off a name on the list.” All Keegan sees is red. Rorke throws your lifeless to him.

Keegan catches your body and slumps to the floor. Rorke sees this as an opportunity to escape, and right now Keegan doesn’t give a shit. He clutches your body closer to him. Hating the way your cold skin touches him. Hating all the dried-up blood and bruises. You suffered, and he couldn’t help you. He screams in both rage and agony. He gently puts you down before trashing the room you were held in. He throws things left and right. He tears down papers from the walls.

At your funeral, he wasn’t any better. If anything, his body was running on pure adrenaline and rage. Once he gets his hand on Rorke. He will show him the wrath that he has bestowed upon him. He can’t help but continuously for not being there to protect you. He stares at your tombstone in anger. ‘How did I let you slip through my fingers?’ That is all he can think about. You were gone, because he was too late. That thought will forever linger in the back of his mind.

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iamcautiouslyoptimistic · 1 year ago

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🦅Russell Adler Headcanons

{Author's Note} Since I'm literally obsessed with this man, I thought I'd post my headcanons for him. All of these are based off of his canon backstory and character with bits of my own speculation thrown in so nothing should be too out of left field here. I may end up posting more of my thoughts on him soon so we shall see. Hope y'all like it and I'd love to hear what you think, as well as any headcanons you guys might have! Tagging @littlemissclandestine for this since she's an Adler fan. Let me know if I did this man justice lol🤭

‼️Content Warning: swearing, suggestive themes‼️

~ ~ ~

-Badass asshole

-Takes awhile for him to soften enough to really love someone

-Flirtatious jerk when he has a crush

-Shows he cares through small actions that can be hard to notice, as well as vague, rather backhanded compliments

-Shamelessly stares from behind those glasses of his

-Thinks it’s really cute when you wear his shades but would never admit it

-Stylish with heavy 70s influence

-Probably modeled for a male fashion magazine at some point LMAO

-Definitely knows how to dance

-Seems like the type to meme a bit on British people (specifically Park lol)

-Very sarcastic, sometimes to the point that you don’t realize he’s actually joking because he's always so monotone

-Secretly loves Belgian waffles (this is a reference to that one Bruce Thomas TikTok lol)

-Has a soft spot for the Beach Boys (I mean, look at that 🎶bushy, bushy blonde hairdo🎶 of his)

-Since so many people have asked and teased him about it (I see y'all in the fandom and I will not accept this slander lol) -> his hair isn’t fake, it’s actually pretty soft, very bouncy, he likes styling it

-Very particular about his appearance as it is one of the few things that he can truly control

-Prefers cats over dogs

-Can get obsessive about certain things and lose himself to them (i.e. his search for Perseus) -> Mason quote: “He spent so long searching for Perseus, he didn’t notice when he lost himself.”

-Still struggles with PTSD from his time in Vietnam, which, alongside his obsession with finding Perseus, is what led to his divorce

-Carries a lot of guilt and regret that he doesn’t like to acknowledge

-Started smoking to cope with the trauma of war, now has a nicotine addiction; when he’s really stressed, he chain smokes like a chimney

-Gets restless if he doesn’t have a cigarette

-Doesn’t sleep well and when he does, he usually wakes up every few hours

-Scars - Shrapnel? Abuse? Torture? Animal attack? No one knows and he’ll never tell

-Kiss or trace those scars and he WILL melt

-Difficult for him to let his guard down

-Has a tendency to isolate himself -> Mason quote: "You were never alone, Adler. Only in your own stubborn head."

-Always wearing those damn glasses cuz STYLE but also to hide his eyes to remain as a sort of blank, emotionless slate to other people

-Absent parents who never showed him real love or support as he grew up so he struggles to do the same for others -> they were the reason he joined the army as soon as he turned 18

-When it comes to cuddling, he loves holding you against his chest and running his fingers along your arm, cheek, or through your hair; small but intimate actions like that are his favorite

-Doesn’t like to show emotions at all, even during more intimate moments; he needs some coaxing to relax in that way, which takes time

NSFW Below👇🏻 (it's really not too bad tho)

-Sit on his lap👀

-Will pin your wrists during the sexy times🫣

-EDGING & OVERSTIMULATION

-After his divorce, he's tended to view sex as more of a transaction where both parties are fulfilling needs for each other so he'd be selfish at first but as your relationship progresses, he'd become far more generous

#russell adler #russell adler x reader #russell adler x you #russell adler headcanons #call of duty black ops cold war #cod bocw #call of duty #cod #Ren's writing #mine mine mine

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coffee-and-tea-time · 3 months ago

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S͟͞i͟͞n͟͞g͟͞,͟͞ ͟͞L͟͞o͟͞v͟͞e͟͞

Sup’! This is our little Halloween surprise!

Yup, we asked ourselves what would happen if instead of falling on the shadow dilf’s liminal space, you fell in one that isn’t quite as sweet. - Tea

Yup Yup, and for that, we decided to write it with some of our shared phobias in mind and make our Phobiarooms with a special yan- - Coffee

Shh, no spoilers. - Tea

word count: 3.3k

tw: hehe, trick or treat? Gore! We gotta warn that one (⁠・⁠–⁠・⁠;⁠)⁠ゞ and it's written in you/yours

This really is like a cliché horror movie, cleaning pools at night sure looks like the perfect excuse for a new horror movie saga, or maybe a game, like-

"Honey, you're gonna fall off, be careful!"

The sweet voice of your coworker interrupts your train of thought, saving you from falling over the pool with the cleaning supplies. You were truly grateful that you got the night shift with her, she literally treat you so sweetly, guess she got the habit to treat people like she treat her children, but it's always sweet and never weird so, everybody just smile when she subconsciously start talking with her mom shenanigans.

"Thanks! Sorry, it's my first night shift so I guess my mind wander a little over silly horror movies"

Fuck, why are you so awkward? Hope you didn't seem so weird. Thankfully, she only smiles at you, giving you a pat on the head before continuing working. God bless her heart.

You walked with shoulders slump to the next pool, cleaning supplies rolling beside you in your cart as they are too heavy to carry by yourself. This job was tiring to say the least, but the pay was damn good, which would be sketchy if it wasn't for the fact the pools you had to clean were massive and always so fucking dirty, stupid kids. How do they manage to lose so many toys without the parents noticing?

The outside ones were more bearable, as the process was more forgiving, leaves and dirt are unavoidable when the pool is out in the wild. Inside pools though... Those were the vain of your existence, everything had to be spotless, the floors were slippery so falling was almost a given, and they always stuck you with cleaning the dressing rooms which were filthy every single time. Today you had to clean the inside pools, so to cope you dragged a coworker with you to help, also some tunes couldn't hurt.

Mindlessly chatting with your coworker you find yourselves wandering to the next pool to clean, the white tile hallways all too cold and echoey stretching farther than you remembered, but at last there the hallway ended, opening up into a round, deep and honestly disgustingly dirty pool. Your coworker comments on it too.

"I really can understand whorever plans this, why do you need hidden pools? I don't think I ever cleaned this area so they sure got some extra people cleaning this."

Your coworker agrees with you, both clueless on how they manage to keep this area a secret for special guests with so many people wandering around on a daily basis. You gotta admit, it got a fancy design, even putting some tunnels of water on the hallways that miraculously were all really clean.

"We might need a bigger vacuum.. I'll be right back" She said, turning around with a tired grunt which you second while looking down at the green-ish water. It didn't smell though, thank god, and so you started to clean a bit while waiting for your coworker to bring the bigger vacuum.

With a soft bristle broom gathering the dirt and grime off the white tiles, you hummed and quietly sang to that one song you had stuck in your head.

Fuck, stupid tiktok and his catchy 6 seconds of a song, you just can’t help but have it on repeat on your brain. Well, you have a lot of time to kill anyways. You gotta admit whatever guests they bring here are really clean, there isn't much dirt, just the minimum that people make by walking.

Your eyes drift through the white tile, from the small, barely there pile of dust you managed to gather to the edge of the circular pool in the middle of the room, the water this soft green like before, but something is… off.

The water wasn't still, it swayed ever so slightly like there was movement, and now that you focused enough, you could see this strange… string? Was it some sort of moss? A deep green mass of what looked like hair could be barely seen at the bottom of the pool through the shadows of its depth, was it there before? You couldn’t recall.

Your immediate thought is to ask your coworker if there is some kind of tool convenient enough to reach the bottom of these giant pools and take out what is down there without having to empty them. But now that you think about it, where's your coworker? Shit, she probably had some trouble in the storage room since it's always so messy there and the tools you guys need are big and difficult to carry, you should've helped her.

You start walking to the hallways once again, sweeping a little as you make your way to what you assume is the way to the storage room while that damned song was still playing on loop in your head, why did it have to be such a banger? Worsened also by those damn majestic edits people have been making… God.

Though… this is not the full story, is it?

The green mass at the bottom of the pool wasn't there before, the water indeed moved, but not on its own.

There is something down there.

As you walked, you heard the slight echo of rustling through the hallway, grunts of struggle, but very subtle. You assume it's your coworker trying to carry all those tools on her own and you feel a pang of guilt, quickening your step and calling out to her.

“Mary? Stay there! I'll help you with the stuff, sorry for not going with you!”

You said casually jogging down the hall, but then a voice makes you stop, the voice of your coworker, but…

That can't be her, can it? You still hear her grunting on the other side, down the hall… so why?

It's right behind you, coming from the pool room you just left

You keep walking, trying to ignore that voice that calls out your name, it is your coworker’s voice, but something feels off. You follow the sounds of those grunts instead and it leads you to one of the side pools, a very gorgeous design with pristine white tile and stairs leading down to a square pool, but the elegant and minimalist pool was tainted with that sight.

Mary was there, grunting with what you now knew was pain, the once green-ish waters painted a haunting shade of crimson, half of Mary was gone, her throat was disheveled, gurgling with her own blood as claw marks covered her whole arms. She struggled, but there was no saving her, she was choking on her own blood, on her own flesh.

You stood there, paralyzed by fear and the gruesome sight of a coworker torn to pieces right before you, her last breath a chilling notion now as you also heard her voice calling out for you from behind.

҉"҉H҉o҉n҉e҉y҉,҉ ҉i҉s҉ ҉t҉h҉a҉t҉ ҉y҉o҉u҉?҉"҉

The distorted voice of Mary echoed closer through the hallway, and with it a dragging sound, almost like how the vacuum’s tube dragged through the wet floors while cleaning. Your mind dissociated for a moment, unable to comprehend the situation you were in, but it didn't take long for everything to scream at you to stay alert, just as that dragging sound creeped behind you through the entrance.

You didn't dare look behind you, the thought of not being alone in a scene like this, in what you foolishly thought was the pool area you worked at. The dragging stopped, for a moment at least. Instead you heard the tapping of wet palms against the floor, then dragging again, and drops of water or whatever it was, dripping down onto the floors with a soft sound.

It took everything from you not to scream and collapse right then and there. Mary's cloudy, blood soaked eye staring blankly ahead, behind you, telling you that you were indeed not alone. Slowly, you turned around, your heart pounding so hard you dreaded the possibility of whatever this thing was hearing every beat and there it stood, a creature, a monster.

Thick, green-ish hair resembling what you saw at the bottom of the pool earlier covering its face, yet not quite hiding its eyes, shining like an opal, if it wasn't for its haunting image you'd say it was beautiful, but it wasn't. The thing stood taller than you by a lot, its snake-like body trailing behind… him? Like an endless rope of green scales that reached up to his hip, scattering along with what looked like clouds of dark green over pale mossy skin. His hands with sharp claws, probably the ones that slashed Mary into pieces, also evident by the thick amount of blood that dripped from them with soft thuds that marked each beat of your heart.

You felt the adrenaline rushing through your veins, like if an explotion went off inside you, your lungs take all the air they can in a matter of seconds.

You took off running, your legs pumping, your breath coming in ragged gasps. You never moved so fast in your life, each step a desperate attempt to escape the danger that loomed behind you. Every nerve in your body was alight with the primal need to flee, to survive. There was no time to think, only to act.

You feel a growing sense of panic as you run through the endless corridors trying to avoid the pools, you swear you can hear your heart beating on your throat as you try not to strip with the water, that thing keeps following you, no longer talking with Mary's voice but instead scream incoherently in differents voices like and old radio, are those the voices of other victims who faced the same fate as your coworker?

҉"҉O҉v҉e҉r҉ ҉h҉e҉r҉e҉!҉ ҉T҉h҉a҉t҉ ҉t҉h҉i҉n҉g҉ ҉i҉s҉ ҉n҉o҉t҉ ҉h҉e҉r҉e҉!҉"҉҉

҉"҉L҉o҉v҉e҉,҉ ҉i҉s҉ ҉t҉h҉i҉s҉ ҉a҉ ҉p҉r҉a҉n҉k҉?҉"҉҉

҉"҉I҉'҉l҉l҉ ҉b҉e҉ ҉r҉i҉g҉h҉t҉ ҉b҉a҉c҉k҉"҉҉

You spot a set of stairs leading down, and your heart leaps with hope. Could this be the exit you've been searching for?

Oh, naive little thing, you already know the answer

You start running towards the stairs, your mind is filled with expectations as you head down the stairs, finally, a way out! But as you are half through it, your heart sinks. Instead of a door or an exit, you find yourself face to face with a massive pool of water.

Desperately, you try to turn around and run back up the stairs but you move too quickly and lose your footing, your ankle twists painfully, and you are thrown off balance, your head slams against the sharp edge of the staircase. The last thing you remember is the feeling of the cold water hitting your back roughly as you fall into the abyss of the pool.

. . .

You groggily open your eyes, your vision still blurry, the room seems deathly silent and your surroundings are eerily still.

As your vision clears, you find yourself lying on the cold floor next to a large pool of water, you notice a tunnel situated in the wall opposite the pool. It seems to be the only way out of this isolated room, but you know it won't take you out of this place entirely don't you?

You carefully turn your head to the other side, trying to inspect the other side of the room. You were met with a rather curious sight; Piled up in various corners of the room are countless trinkets, personal belongings, and various objects that you usually complain about while you work.

Among the items, you see broken glasses, faded and crumpled pamphlets, forgotten toys, some broken bags and a lot of stuff in general, some of them look like they’ve been there for a long time, covered in dust and mold or straight up rusty.

Others appear more recent, still retaining some of their original color. It’s unclear why these objects are here, but they sure do create an odd feeling. How did they end up here in the first place? Is this room like some sort of discard bin? Somehow it doesn't feel like it... It's feel more like it's someone's

҉"҉T҉r҉a҉s҉u҉r҉e҉"҉

You almost jump as you hear that radio voice again, but your hurt leg forbids you to do so, you gather all your courage to look at the direction of the voice and see that thing peeking out of the pool, can he read minds or something? What kind of creature is this?

��҉"҉T҉r҉a҉s҉u҉r҉e҉"҉

He repeats, nuzzling his face against your hand as you froze still, okey, he wasn't replying to you but rather, calling up to you? Maybe, just maybe there is a way that this could be like a fantasy book and this thing wants to help instead of eating you? He sure must know a way out… probably.

҉"҉I҉s҉ ҉t҉h҉a҉t҉ ҉y҉o҉u҉?҉"҉

You watch in speechless fear as the creature emerges from the pool, its half snakelike body undulating through the water gracefully. His long, serpentine body glides gracefully through the water, his scales glistening in the dim light.

With a surprisingly delicate touch, the thing reaches out with one of his arms, grabbing a hold of a toy resting on top of a pile. For a brief moment, the monstrous creature locks eyes with you before holding the toy up in a strangely cute display.

҉"҉I҉s҉ ҉t҉h҉a҉t҉ ҉y҉o҉u҉?҉"҉

He repeats himself in yet another voice, you focus on the toy, trying to figure out what he's trying to say. The toy is a classic waterproof toy for kids shaped like a balloon with lights and music. However, this particular toy has seen better days. The once bright lights now flicker weakly, and the familiar cheerful tune of the children's song has become distorted, sounding more like a sad, warped version of its former self…. Wait a minute.

"D-do you… want me to sing?"

You manage to ask, your voice quivering a little. The thing seems confused, like he has never heard such words in his life, his eyes fixed on you, waiting for you to comply with his silent request, so you figure out it's better to give it a try and not test the patience of the creature.

You clear your throat, trying to force out the words without stammering and then inhaling deeply, steeling your nerves, and begin to sing. Your voice wavers a little at first, but you force yourself to continue. The thing watches you intently, his eyes never leaving the focus on you.

As you sing while praying inside not to forget the lyrics of the music of the toy, he moves slowly closer to you, his long body slowly slithering across the ground in a strangely graceful manner, almost as if it's being drawn to the sound of your voice. As the last notes of the song die out, you take a deep breath and try to speak to the creature in the most simple words for him to be able to understand.

"You want me to repeat that?"

҉"҉R҉e҉p҉e҉a҉t҉"҉

You blink in shock, momentarily thrown off balance by the thing's ability to mimic your voice. But then you shake your head, you had to focus on what this creature wants, so you start singing the song again.

And again

AND AGAIN

"̶̦͎̲̜͊̏̽̔R̷̬̱̮̫̲̈́́̂e̸̦͍̮̥͙̔̈́p҈͙̣̒̀e҈̱͇̯̝̙̚̚à̸̩̲̆ͅt̶̬͚͊͒,҈̟̯͕͋͌͗̏ L̴̯̞͈̣̅̓ͅo҈̘͇̮͙̃͑̽̂̎ͅv̵̤̬̩̞̓̃̊̉e̸͇̟̓̚"̴͖͔̭̆͂

You try to sing again, forcing yourself to muster up what little energy you have left, but your throat is dry and sore. After a few moments, the coughing starts, and you simply can’t continue.

You quickly try to explain to the creature, gesturing to your throat and making coughing motions, hoping that it understands.

҉"҉H҉u҉n҉g҉r҉y҉?҉ ҉U҉n҉d҉e҉r҉s҉t҉a҉n҉d҉,҉ ҉L҉o҉v҉e҉,҉ ҉I҉'҉l҉l҉ ҉b҉e҉ ҉r҉i҉g҉h҉t҉ ҉b҉a҉c҉k҉"҉

You watch as he slowly submerges itself back into the water, its large form disappearing beneath the surface. Relieved, you attempt to stand up, trying to seize the opportunity to escape.

However, as soon as you put weight on your injured ankle, a sharp pain shoots up your leg, causing you to gasp and sink back down to the floor. Looking down, you realize the severity of your injury, the ankle purple and swollen.

You curse under your breath in pain, maybe you could crawl and hide under a pile of trinkets but it sounds really stupid, he could easily find you again, and you sure as hell don't want to risk making him angry.

You didn't have much time to figure out what you should do as he returns from the depths of the pool, and you look up, expecting it to have found something to help you. Instead, it was something completely unexpected.

He holds a horrific amount of limbs in his arms, and with an almost loving-like delight, it carefully places them on the ground beside you before giving you an expectant look, like a puppy bringing a bone to his master.

You feel your stomach clench as revulsion and horror wash over you, a cold sweat breaking out on your skin.

The creature's smile is nightmarishly sweet, his rows of sharp teeth gleaming, as he takes something from the corpse's pile and presents you with… the dismembered head of Mary.

You're paralyzed with disgust and terror as the thing act like he's offering you a top tier snack, you quickly press your lips together as he press the open cut of her neck against your mouth, trying to feed you lovingly as you force yourself to not start crying out of fear as your mouth and cheeks get painted with her blood.

҉"҉N҉o҉ ҉l҉i҉k҉e҉?҉ ҉D҉i҉f҉f҉e҉r҉e҉n҉t҉.҉.҉.҉.҉"҉҉

He finally stopped trying to feed you after seconds that feeled like an eternity. But your peace didn't last long, his cold, slimy tongue glides out of its mouth, leaving a trail of glistening saliva in its wake. Suddenly, it begins to lick your lips and cheeks, cleaning the blood, the sensation both repulsive and unnerving, putting you on the verge of throwing up.

The thing moves away from you to reach for one of the broken bags that lies on top of the pile of trinkets and rummages inside. To your surprise, it extracts actual human food and a bottle of water, both seemingly in good condition.

With an almost cat-like eagerness, the creature pushes the 'gifts' towards you, his serpentine body coiling anxiously, as if awaiting a sign of acceptance.

"T-thanks"

҉"҉T҉h҉a҉n҉k҉s҉"҉҉

You shiver as you take the food and water from his hands, your hands trembling involuntarily. The creature watches you intently, its gaze fixed on every movement you make, almost like a protective guardian watching over you. As you begin to eat, he seems to relax slightly. It seems happy to watch you eat.

"You know if… this repeat?"

You said pointing to the water and food, it's very important you have proper things to consume in order for him not to try feed you a somebody's limb again, and he nods happily, you sight in relief, at least he seems to understand you need different type diet that him, and he seem very happy to be able to provide it to you.

You're sipping the water, happy that at least you aren't going to die from starvation, and suddenly, the thing's long, snake-like limbs wrap around you in an embrace that feels both comforting and terrifying. He rests his head on top of yours, its muscular arms encircling your body, trapping you in its coils. As you tense up, feeling the panic rise, he speaks, his voice once again mimicking yours.

҉"҉R҉e҉p҉e҉a҉t҉"҉

Your voice falters as you begin to sing again, the realization of your dire situation slowly sinking in. You know deep down that there's no escape possible. There's no exit in this room except the watery tunnel placed after the void deep pool that the creature uses to move in and out, and the odds of you outrunning him are close to none.

He, however, seems completely oblivious to your despair. Its head rests calmly on top of yours, almost like it's listening intently to your voice.

҉"҉L҉o҉v҉e҉ ҉T҉r҉e҉a҉s҉u҉r҉e҉"҉҉

The creature holds you firmly in his coiled embrace, his head nuzzling against the top of yours in an affectionate manner. Your mind races in a panicked frenzy as a sickening thought takes root in your mind.

Is this your life now?

HIII, this is a really something new for us to write so I hope it came out good. My twin did a simple doodle before university stabbed him with exams, and I love it. He wanted to draw more but he's being forced to rest (no clue how he manages to draw such good doodle in a damn minute or less)- coffee

And just in case i'm giving y'all a clear version of some of his/its dialoogues:

"Honey, is that you?"

"Over here! That thing is not here"

"Love, is this a prank?"

"I'll be right back"

"Treasure"

"Is that you?"

"Hungry? Undertand, Love, I'll be right back"

"No like? Diferent..."

sorry for any misspellings or weird sentence structure ❣

image from pinterest, drawing by Tea ⚘

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notheroicnotromantic · 2 months ago

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I'll take you on a ride, I'll be your Vixen

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Lando Norris X Oscar Piastri

Word Count: ≈3,2k

Christmas Fluff, Humor, my way to cope with Qatar

Someone keeps hanging up mistletoes around the McLaren hospitality and Lando Norris? He's losing his fucking mind.

read on ao3 oder continue down below. 🫶

I’ll take you for a ride, I’ll be your Vixen

Think I only want you under my mistletoe

I might change your contact to "Has a huge North Pole"

You said you like my stockings better on the floor

Boy, I've been a bad girl, I guess I'm gettin' coal (no)

Lemme come warm you up, you been out in the snow

Baby, my tongue goes numb, sounds like "ho-ho-ho"

-⋆꙳•❅‧*₊⋆☃︎‧*❆₊⋆

Someone at McLaren is fucking with Lando Norris and it’s driving him proper mad. They’re in Abu Dhabi currently, last race of the 2024 season. After Qatar, they’re still battling it out for the Constructor’s Championship, honestly, he’d prefer not to talk about the Qatar race altogether. They had flown out for the last stop of the triple-header straight away on Monday morning, arriving about an hour later in Abu Dhabi.

It started straight away, when Oscar and he had walked into the team’s hospitality on that first day, just some time after lunch break. Lando had been the one to walk in first, opening up the glass door for them both and holding it out for Oscar. Waiting a little for his teammate to catch up, he failed to miss how everyone in the room had gone silent, watching the two of them arrive with curious eyes. Just as Oscar had come to a stop next to him, one of their engineers had cleared his throat. “Guess they caught another pair,” Marie from PR had said, and only then Lando realized something was wrong. Very wrong indeed.

Why? Because hanging above their heads was a mistletoe. Just Lando’s luck, really, to get caught beneath one with his teammate he’s been harbouring a silly crush on ever since the start 2024 season. Listen, maybe he’d spent a little too much time on TikTok. Getting lost in a rabbit hole of Oscar Piastri thirst trap edits had led to someone very interesting revelations. (Max had laughed at him, when he told him about it. Not about having a crush on Oscar, of course, but rather finding out about his apparent bisexuality. “You’re not quite straight, the sky’s blue. Moving on!”)

Oscar just laughs though, “Yeah, don’t think that’s meant for us, mate,” before dipping through the space left to Lando and strolling into the directions of their driver rooms. Duh, Lando thinks, of course he doesn’t want to kiss you, stupid. Maybe he’s a little flippant for the rest of the day, afterwards. Being flat out rejected like that, hurts more than he’d like to admit even now.

So, when he walks into the McLaren motorhome on Tuesday and there’s no more evil-green hanging from the ceiling, he thinks he’s safe. They’re only there to review some things for the upcoming days, a meeting about how they’ll be spending the weeks before Christmas at the factory. It’s his fault, really, for assuming it’d be a one-time thing. Like the 2024 season hadn’t been a series of the universe fucking him over. Why not go for it one last time?

The most embarrassing thing is the fact that their bosses are around this time. Lando, running a little late of course, falls onto the chair next to Oscar, when both Andrea and Zak begin to laugh. “Boys,” Zak wheezes, “I think there’s a little elf working something out for the team,” as he points upwards to the ceiling. Of course, there’s another mistletoe swinging above them, and this time around Lando feels targeted. Whoever put that up knows where Oscar and he like to sit in these debriefs. Who is fucking with them like this?

Lando splutters, “No, mate. That can’t be for us, it’s probably some of the girls playing a prank on their co-workers or something. Aren’t Ava from Marketing and Joseph from strategy dating?” Honestly, he’s not sure they have an Ava from Marketing in the team.

“You’re thinking of Lydia from PR, actually,” Oscar thinks out loud. Yeah, sure. Keep them coming universe, maybe if he takes one more loss this year he’ll just die of embarrassment. Spare them all from having to through this the next year as well. He’s just about to speak up to defend himself when Andrea interrupts, “Well, wherever it might have come from, I’ll have a talk with management, I’m not sure our employee guidelines allow such a thing.”

Thankfully, they start with the meeting then. Afterwards he thinks he’s fine. Save. Yesterday there’d only been on attack, so surely their mysterious Grinch (Lando refuses to call them an elf, considering they’re putting him through torture) must be done for the day, right?

Wrong. So wrong on every merit.

The team calls them downstairs for some sort of challenge, the last one they’ll have to film for the year. Just as they’re heading into the cafeteria, there’s giggles breaking out all around the room. Lando doesn’t dare to raise his head for a second, but he knows exactly what they just walked into. He sighs and thinks maybe it’s time to finally give in. “You guys have to kiss now,” Clara from Online Marketing explains, and Lando would like to roll his eyes hard enough for them roll into the back of his head and never return. Thanks, girlie, figured that one out already.

Oscar’s cheeks are turning into a cherry-red next to him, and he’s starting to look uncomfortable. Curse his weak heart and his darn teammate for making him want to protect the younger from everything bad, burry him in blankets and make him a hot chocolate. Fuck, there’s got to be a way for this mess to stop, right?

“Maybe if we’ll do it, they will stop,” Lando squeezes out quickly, not giving himself a chance to back out. “What!?” The Australian looks even more perplexed at that. Before he can think better of it Lando steps on to his toes, which is just adding insult to injury, and presses a soft kiss to Oscar’s cheek. “There, that should satisfy the Christmas spirits, right?”

The blush starts to make its way up to Oscar’s ears and Lando starts to worry he’ll be fired for sexual harassment of a co-worker. Fuck, he went too far, didn’t he? “I’m so sorry, Osc,” he blurts out then, and he’d really like to sprint back to his driver’s room. Maybe he’ll do that, fuck the PR team and their silly challenges. They can figure something out, maybe act like he’s sick or something along those lines, so Lando starts to make a run for it.

Doesn’t get far though, considering the tight hold that’s suddenly appeared on his wrist. There’s a smile on Oscar’s face now, and it looks even cuter with the rosy cheeks beneath warm, chocolate brown eyes. “Landers, you’re fine,” Oscar breathes, “Let’s just get through this video and then we can go and head back to the hotel, alright?”

It’s what they end up doing, the PR team have prepared a collection of different kind of Christmas sweets and pastries from around the world and their task is to make a tier list. They all are pretty mint in Lando’s humble opinion, but he’s got a sweet tooth, really. His teammate is severely less enthusiastic about some of the candy, but he caves in when Lando wants to put them into a higher tier. The power he’s got over Oscar in moments like these, and the soft gaze that’s turned towards him have caused many delusional thoughts in Lando brain. Listen, you can only read ‘Heart-Eyes-Piastri’ so many times about your own teammate before you start believing those things. Lando’s just a silly little guy at the end of the day, with a big, fat, dumb, gay crush.

Thankfully, on Wednesday they’re both at different sponsor events and off-track, so it’s easy to avoid Oscar. And any mistletoes, too. When they return for media day on Thursday, they make it through most of the day without any incidents. Well, there was that moment in the morning, where Oscar had greeted him and Lando almost spilled the tea in his mug on himself but that he can’t blame that one on anyone else.

Lando’s on his way back from the press conference when he decides it’s the perfect time to invade Oscar’s space and privacy with his stellar personality and pleasing presence. Maybe he’s also still a little hurt from that penalty. Getting put through the ringer by the press once more had caused a little more hurt. He’s learned it’s best for himself not to be alone with his thoughts on those occasions, and being able to poke at Oscar’s patience a little or tease the younger, until he gets all huffy and cute is usually a great way to improve his mood.

Just being around Oscar is enough most days, really.

More than half the time, Lando doesn’t even bother knocking anymore, so he just opens the door but before he can waltz into the room, he runs into Oscar’s back. Oscar, who’s busy trying to reach something hanging from the ceiling. No, it screams in Lando’s head. No fucking way.

“Osco?” He mumbles into the soft material of the McLaren branded polo the other is wearing. Oscar sighs softly before turning around, getting his hands on Lando’s waist and pulling him in close. Resting his cheek on top of Lando’s dark curls, “I don’t think I have to tell you what I’ve been trying to rip from my ceiling for the past ten minutes, do I?”

“Do you think the team’s filming some kind of prank?” Lando starts to think about his suggestion in greater detail and can’t say he’d put it past the PR department to plan something crazy like that.

Seems like Oscar agrees with the sentiment, nodding his head in a move that makes his chin graze the top of Lando’s head, “Honestly, I can’t say it’s not something they’d come up with it.” They separate then and Lando helps his teammate to get rid of the offence grass, Oscar putting his arms around the older one more time and lifting him up, so Lando can reach the end of the strands and pull them down. “Well, at least no one was around for that one, right?” The Brit tries to make light of the situation.

It doesn’t change the fact that the whole ordeal is humiliating and Lando’s starting to believe however might be orchestrating this might be aware of Lando’s feelings for the Australian. That would be a nightmare come true, seriously it’d be first time in his Lando might start to consider changing teams, once the offers flies onto his desk. If it saves his (and Oscar’s) dignity, he’d be able to patch up his papaya-bleeding heart. Eventually, at least.

The idea comes to him on Friday morning, as he’s chewing on his overnight oats, Jon sitting next to him and munching on a Nutella toast. Modern form of torture, really. Anyways, the idea: Maybe the only way to get through this weekend, is staying away from Oscar. As much as it pains him to do so. He’ll do it to safe the tentative friendship he managed to build with Oscar over the past two years.

Sadly, it seemed a lot easier in his head. Of course, Lando knows it’s not as easy as simply running out of a room once Oscar walks into it (which he still does of course) but in between practice session they usually like to sit down and debrief a little. Talk about how the car’s feeling beneath them and what set-up changes might work. When Lando dips out of the garage every time the younger dares to step a little closer, and he knows he’s being quite obvious about it. Judging from the disappointing look on both Will and Jon’s faces, which - rude? Mind your own fricking business.

The hurt in Oscar’s eyes though? That’s a different story altogether and Lando can’t help but feel bad about it. If only the younger could understand he’s doing it for them, not trying to ruin their relationship. Maybe he’s being uncharacteristically optimistic, thinking their friendship could still stand, after the carnation his feelings will bring to it. At the end of the day, he’s only got himself and his wretched heart to blame.

Turns out all his work has been for nothing, which is just the cherry on top. McLaren is hosting a small Christmas party at the common room Friday evening, it’s nothing compared to the actual celebrations they will hold the days before the Holiday once they’re back in Woking but it’s nice, nonetheless. Lando’s ecstatic about the Christmas pastries and Holiday hits playing in the background every year, mostly because Jon will forget about his diet for around three hours that night. It’s more than he gets on most days, so that enough is reason to celebrate.

He truly tries his best the whole time, erratically crossing the room to find himself in conversation with the person, that just happens to be standing furthest away from a certain Australian racing driver. At first, he’s locked in conversation with Zak about their holiday and break plans, coordinating a day to hit the golf court together. Then, he’s busy catching up with some of the press team, asking Lauren about her kids and their Christmas wishes. Of course, he's also with Andrea for some of the night, and Will joins them too.

Lando feels like he’s being watched the entire time. And he is, the way Oscar’s gaze follows him around the room makes the older sweat in his ridiculous papaya-coloured Christmas sweater. Oscar seems to be able to read Lando’s thoughts and emotions on most days, so he figures it’s no different today. Much to his own disappointment.

Eventually, the party fizzles out. Most of the employees biding their goodbye and heading back to their hotels, they still have a qualifying session tomorrow, after all. There’s nothing Lando more desperately hopes for than making up his errors to them all.

Unfortunately, it also means there’s significantly less of a buffer between him and Oscar. Only so many times Lando can hide between Jon and the wall, without it becoming ridiculous. Once the other driver crosses the room to come up to Lando, Jon in a truly evil act of betrayal, pushes Lando out from behind himself and leaves him there. Left to the wolves, Lando can’t do nothing but wait for Oscar to come to a stop in front of him.

The unimpressed stare that’s looking down on him (their height difference is less than this, Lando swears to God) makes his stomach flutter. “Hi,” Lando squeaks out. Yeah, that’s it. Play it cool, Lando thinks, he won’t notice anything’s wrong like that.

“Okay, mate. What’s wrong with you?” Oscar deadpans in reply. Lando would like for this whole fucking-him-over spiel to be over sometime soon. Can he call in sick for work tomorrow? Would Jon kill him? No, probably not.

Andrea would though and he’s way scarier.

Lando’s stuck thinking about his excuse when they get interrupted by the drawl of Oscar’s performance coach, Kim grinning at them. “Lads?” The older Australian is pointing up towards the ceiling above their heads and Lando might implode right here and there. Fuck over McLaren in the Constructor’s Championship one last time. Going out like the gods intended, maybe.

No fucking way.

But of course, when Lando raises his head properly there’s another mistletoe hanging between them. Can the aura of a motionless object be menacing? It’s a menacing mistletoe, at least in Lando’s mind. The biggest groan passes his lips. Fine, okay. Someone in the team wants Lando to destroy their teammate dynamics for ever? Let him prove to that person how grave of a mistake they’ve just made.

Without saying another word Lando grabs Oscar’s wrist and drags him along behind himself, powerwalking down the hallways until they reach his driver’s room. There’s McLaren branded hoodies flying all around the floor and Lando only notices now he’s forgotten to turn off his Switch, the Breath of the Wild soundtrack filling in the silence in the room. Rito Village by day, what a damn banger.

“It’s that what this whole thing has been about? The mistletoes?” Oscar looks properly astonished at the revelation. Like he can’t quite believe Lando’s foolishness. Honestly Lando can’t believe it himself on most days. “Lando, I don’t care about those,” Oscar explains and there’s a smile spreading on his lips. Trust Oscar Piastri to look this cute just before he’s about to shatter Lando Norris’ heart into a thousand pieces.

“I care,” he grumbles turning away from the other. It’s a senseless effort, trying to save the last of his dignity by refusing to look Oscar one more time. “I figured it out, you know? Why they keep appearing around us.”

There’s a confused noise leaving Oscar, “Uh-huh. And why do you think it’s happening?” This is it, the end of it. Lando Norris, November 13th, 1999 – December 6th, 2024, cause of death: embarrassing crush reveal.

“Whoever’s doing it must know I’ve been harbouring a stupid crush on you for most of the season. I’m sorry, Osc, I didn’t mean to drag you into it. I swear I’ll get them to back off, and then if you uh, want to put some distance between the both of us, I’d understand that too, of course,” the Brit rambles. Still doesn’t dare to turn around to look Oscar, too afraid to face the other’s feelings.

In a twist of fate, Oscar decides to remedy it by himself, grabbing a hold of Lando and turning him around. The expression on Oscar’s face is nothing like Lando expected, a white smile with bunny teeth, a warm flush to his cheeks. “Lando, I’ve had a crush on you since I was fifteen, keep up please,” he laughs before letting his hands wander to his cheeks.

Oscar pulls him up and into a soaring kiss. Lando feels like he’s just short-circuited but thankfully his brain reboots quickly and he’s kissing back. They start out quite wholesome, just a gently brushing of lips. Until Lando decides he’s had enough of Christmas cheer and let’s his tongue swipe across Oscar’s lower lip gently. He’s about to take it up a notch, when there’s suddenly cheering and clapping behind them.

They flinch apart in a flash. It’s Jon and Kim, standing in the open doorway with twin smiles on their faces. Those scheming little grinches. “Looks like our plan worked,” Jon hums, clearly pleased with himself. The rage on Lando’s face must be pretty telling, because in the next moment both of their trainers vanish back into the hallways.

Lando’s just about to run after them, when Oscar grabs him by the waist instead and drags him back, until Lando’s back collides with the other’s chest. Their difference in sizes even more obvious, with the way Oscar’s shoulders embrace his own. “Baby,” Oscar’s whispers into his ear, “I think we have some more making up of lost time to do, before we take care of those two.”

And yeah, that’s – that’s pretty fucking fair.

⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆ ₊⋆⋆꙳❅‧ ‧❆

thanks for reading xoxo

#landoscar #lando norris x oscar piastri #twinklaren #f1 rpf #ao3 fanfic #my work

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seniasworld · 3 months ago

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It's Been Three Weeks ...

(this post is simply to get my own thoughts and feelings regarding Liam Payne's death out. skip if ya don't care. <3)

It's been three weeks since Liam Payne has passed, and I am still having a hard time wrapping my brain around it. I am an old Directioner, as I discovered the boys and their music when I was about 14 or 15 and I adored them up until Zayn left the band. I remember being so shy about the fact that I, a teenage girl, was influenced to adore these 5 boys who were also teenagers at the time. Thankfully, I realized that it isn't a bad thing to find some sort of comfort in strangers, and no, I was not part of the group who failed to respect their privacy and boundaries as fellow human beans. I loved them dearly and unfortunately, cut that shit off once I had bigger life things to worry about.

About three months before the news of Liam's death, I had finally committed to deleting thousands ...thousands of memes and pictures that came with being a Directioner during their prime. I had so many photos that I hadn't even looked at in years taking up space in my drive and I had do either pay for more digital storage (lmfaooo yeah right) or delete things I didn't need anymore, so that's what I did. Oddly enough, it was kind of a relief to get rid of 99% of those images, as I really felt it was a nice way to reconnect with that part of my life without shame or guilt, but appreciation and love.

However, I received the news of his death from the only Directioner friend I stayed in touch with all these years. The same friend I stayed up all night with, talking about the boys, waiting for songs to release, crying on Skype together when the wind slightly shifted in our little world. The only friend who I committed to meeting in person multiple times throughout our lives. She sent me a news clip on TikTok and girl, when I tell you my hear sank ...shit was SUNK. I didn't want to believe it, so I didn't. I was in such a great state of denial and shock that I couldn't even find it in myself to have empathy. All I wanted to do was prove that it was some misinformation or some stupid prank. I guess that's one way to cope, right?

Anyway, the teenage girl in me was devastated. I instantly recalled certain posts that were made either on here or on Twitter back in the 1D days that talked so much about how we would miss these days and they would pass us by so quickly and before we knew it, we would be grieving the loss of one of our boys after going so long without being so obsessively invested in their lives. I couldn't believe that we were losing one of them so soon. I couldn't stand the fact that I felt guilty for not being more invested than I have been in each of their music careers, even though I shouldn't. Really, I was just surprised at the fact that an influential part of my childhood ...or rather, teenage years, was just gone and it took his passing for me to realize the impact they all had.

I considered myself a Harry girl, and iykyk, us girlies were in the trenches, but my point with this is that I still loved all the boys. I don't know if I can truly express it, but watching their interviews, performances, vlogs, interacting with them on Twitter even though I was lost in the sea of fans, even just listening to their voices in their music was comforting. I appreciated so much that these boys were told from the very beginning that they wouldn't be successful and then they just blew it out the water. I appreciated so much that even though they were put together as a last resort and even lost X-Factor, who they were as people was what caught our attention as fans. For me, they were a safe space. For a lot of us, they were physical evidence that creative, funny, and compassionate people exist and that they can be boys/men. For a lot of us, they were simply all we had to get through each day.

I'm not going to sit here and pretend that some of the news that surrounds Liam was always positive. In fact, I was kind of mad at him for my own reasons for a bit before he passed. But the fact is, his presence in the band was crucial and so heavily valued that you didn't even have to be a 1D fan for his death to impact you in some way. His voice was beautiful and the way he carried himself compared to the other boys, especially when they were younger, was unique and powerful. I am so sorry that this has happened to him and I am so hurt for those in his life who actually knew him and loved him personally. I wish it didn't take death for people to realize that compassion, patience, and accountability go so fucking far no matter who you are and what you do. I wish he was in a different situation that would have never allowed for him to go the way he did.

I want to remind you, if you are still reading this, to understand that mental health takes a huge toll and informs our thoughts and behavior. Addiction is indicative of one's inability to face themselves. And let me ask you: how many people do you think you are wiling to face when you struggle to face yourself?

We must be kind to others, but more importantly, we must be kind to ourselves. It's okay to make mistakes. Mistakes do not make you a bad person, and holding yourself and the ones you love accountable IS an act of love that will benefit the world around you.

I think this is all I have on the matter, for now. I am still quite sad, as I have experienced personal losses this year alone, so my heart goes out to those who have also been effected by Liam's unexpected passing.

If you ever want to chat or share any thoughts, follow and shoot me a message. I'll be around.

Goodnight. x

Yesenia

#liam payne #niall horan #harry styles #louis tomlinson #zayn malik #one direction #1d #grief #fangirl #directioners #coping #mental health #parasocial relationships

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theoryofwhatnow · 10 days ago

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i am actually quite depressed that i won’t be able to edit anymore after the ByteDance ban. bear with me while i ramble because the impending doom is about to kill me.

it has been my proudest accomplishment and favorite pastime to create content and share this movie with so many people. bringing in new faces and introducing people to this film who may not have EVER crossed paths with it if not for a platform like tiktok and the popularity of video editing. but now that’s all going away and there’s no substitute for it.

i can’t edit on any other software because A.) i only taught myself to use CapCut when i set out to “market” this film in the first place, and B.) because i can’t afford a better software or even a laptop to edit on. it would be useless anyway because there aren’t any other sites or apps that are as encouraging of editing and push out that kind of material.

it wasn’t ever really just a hobby, yk? i was absolutely determined to share Like Minds with however many people i could and i maintained that for over two years now, even at times when the best clips i could find were from old Youtube videos/trailers. And although i succeeded to an extent, it is incredibly disappointing to me that my endeavor will be cut short before i’m even slightly ready for it to end.

the days of explaining time and time again all the possibilities of the ending and receiving horrified but excited DMs from people who watched the film are over. i won’t ever be tagged in a new LM editor’s videos by a fellow fandom member who got to them before i did and then hold a long and heartfelt conversation with them while they gush about their enthusiasm for it. Even on this site, i won’t be able watch a few new profiles pop up after one of my videos do well and i direct them here for analysis content and just an overall fandom community that tiktok doesn’t seem to really have the algorithm to support.

i’m obviously not taking all the credit for making this film more relevant, that is not my intention or what i’m trying to say at all, i’ve had the help of a few other amazing editors that i will also be missing on tiktok specifically and also our lovely fandom residents on various social medias such as twitter, instagram and the hellsite that is Tumblr.com. but even just the dozens of DMs i receive monthly and the literal 10k+ comments weekly are so so important to me and are significant enough to have me distraught over their oncoming absence.

I’ve been so happy and honestly privileged to have taken on such a task and kept up on it for as long as i have, but i really don’t know how i’m gonna cope once i am no longer able to do it. because i have no intention of just “moving on” and forgetting this film haha.

i guess you guys are just gonna be stuck with me and have to power through how insufferable i’m gonna be now that i don’t have another place to express it.

damn this is SO SAD. i’m losing all the hard work and the profile i’ve built since i was fifteen. i hate it here.

#there’s a few upsides. but i think i just want to take some time and be negative and theatric over this #i’m also a bit mortified that it’s gonna be on its way to become lost media after this.#not that i don’t have faith in the few of us that are still here to keep it alive. but after sandman s2 how is anyone gonna hear of it if-#-they don’t like actively seek it out or know someone who’s familiar with it?#i know there’s other methods. but they just seem less effective (imo) and that makes my current situation feel hopeless #there were so many edits i was gonna make and things i wanted to share and PEOPLE i wanted to meet before this was all over #i’ve spent so much time being dedicated to this movie. it’s like my own personal burning of the library of alexandria #i will be inconsolable after the 19th so let this be a preview for all of you #like minds #murderous intent #like minds 2006 #like minds fandom #editing #tiktok

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coolingrosa · 5 months ago

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Survivors guilt within yourself (Online edition)

This may be TMI and too much dumping bout my life, but I think it’s important to talk about, especially with so many young artists looking to make it big online.

I have this weird feeling towards stepping away from the internet.

I’m not saying this is me leaving, as I never want to stop making content. However, I have definitely drifted from the online life style including discord conversations, tiktok drama, constant YouTube posts, etc.

Why? Well, I want to make a YouTube video about this one day, but to boil it down: The internet was my coping mechanism for many years.

Now that I’m out of my abusive household, I can actually STATE now publicly how I was living in a mentally and physically abusive environment for all my eighteen years of existing. Just to brush the top of it as I won’t dive too deep (that’s for a future YouTube video), but I want to give some context as to what I was dealing with: I lived in a household where my brother was a diagnosed sociopath, my father was a narcissist, and the family members around were passive to the abuse my sister, brother, and I faced. These disorders do NOT automatically make you a bad person, evident by how though my brother was not a good role model and was disruptive to my development, he was a better father figure to me than my own father and shielded my sister and I from the brunt of the abuse for many years until he moved out. However, my father is a substance abuser as well, as with this disorder, such things do not mix well. I will not go any further about the abuse besides the fact that I draw my sona with body scars for a reason. They were not self inflicted and never were, even though some assume they are. Anyone in similar environments knows how desperate you are to find a way out. My way out was online. From the ages of eleven to seventeen, I became cripplingly dependent on online life. All my friends were online. I consumed content daily to distract from my life outside my room. All was okay and stable for a bit until I began posting at fourteen.

At first, posting was very simple. I’d come home from school and draw something quick and send it on its way. However, as time went on, the attachment to online life- to my online persona- became addictive. I began posting everyday. My only focus and drawing attempts were at tiktoks or YouTube videos. I became so absorbed with likes and comments and creating content that I began to slip away from the small number of real life friends I had, until I blinked and realized that they were all gone.

I was sixteen when this hit, and it only pushed me to get more absorbed into my content, especially when I got back into Undertale.

The worst times in my life were covered up by spam posting on my TikTok- five videos in one day that hid the pain and suffering I was trying to bury. All my friends became online, and I preferred being called Rosa than my real name. I was addicted. I could never be seen without a device to draw on, to post on, or to talk on. If I didn’t have a device, I was forced to confront the reality of my living situation, and I didn’t want to do that.

This began crumbling, though, when my online life began to feel unsafe as well. Many things happened at once that made it terrifying to even look at my phone. The turmoil from losing this safe space I had spent years indulging in was soul crushing, and though it sounds silly to be so upset over losing the comfort of the internet, it was life shattering. It forced me to confront everything I had been ignoring. It forced me to be alive.

Now that I’m in college, I’ve been offline a lot, and the weird sense of survivor guilt I have towards my fifteen year old self is strange. It feels like that young girl is inside me and angry at me for leaving behind a old comfort of mine- something that was so dear- something that defined who I was and for a very long time was the only thing keeping me here.

I survived. And I have other ways to cope. And the guilt of finding those things and people is strong. But I’m happy that I found it. Though fifteen year old me is angry, I’m happy.

So…why do I say all this? Why pour my heart out after stating that my closeness to online life is what made me blind to my real life?

Because I know there are people out there who were or are thinking like me.

Building a platform for yourself is an incredible feat, and I’m forever grateful for all my followers and supporters, but creating my account is also my biggest regret. I want to say to young creators starting out to find a balance. Don’t let the numbers define you. Don’t let who you are online dictate who you are in real life. Don’t forget there even IS a real life. What happens online is minuscule to the joys of going outside and breathing in the air. Seeing the trees sway in the breeze. Though being online can be an escape, it can also be a trap. Don’t fall too deep, because when your able to swim out to safety in the future, it’ll be harder to breach the surface.

So, if I don’t post as often- if I don’t reply to comments or dms as often- it’s not me leaving or being hateful. I’m finally living. I’m breathing and allowing myself to crawl out of the rut I’ve been rotting in for years now. I’m finally alive.

So for me, take a walk outside today without your phone. Remember what it’s like to be human. It sounds silly, but I think many of us forget what it’s like to live as we did as kids. Before the internet was popularized, and walking down the street of your neighborhood was just another Saturday afternoon.

#chronically online #internet addiction #rant post #positive thoughts #positive mental attitude #Artist struggles #cooling rosa rambles

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lokilysolbitch · 5 months ago

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literally the least educated ppl on DID/OSDD1/PDID i've ever seen are fake claimers

these are inspired by tiktok comments i see on other systems videos:

"too many j names,,,,,,you must be faking" so true babes they actually have "can't have too many j names" in the diagnostic criteria great work you got it

"too many alters" pls open google

"me when i make up friends bc im lonely" so what if you used your brain and considered why a disorder caused by trauma....and unstable attachment to caregivers.............could correlate to someone being lonely. :D. next you should tell someone with eczema "me when my skin is just itchy🙄"

"DID is caused by trauma so why are you posting silly videos on tiktok" so actually you can be traumatized and use tiktok. funnily enough. especially in the disorder with amnesia that can make you forget you are traumatized hope this helps but maybe you can try thinking on your own next time tho okay?

"DID is only in 1% of the global population" yes babes. so in a school of 1000, 10 people will have DID. so in the millions of fucking tiktok users guess how many will have DID please learn your fucking percentages also pretty sure that statistic is outdated and doesn't count OSDD1, PDID, and undiagnosed folks

"but you're not diagnosed" yes DID only kicks in after diagnosis good catch

"they probably made up their diagnosis" that's just a theory you made up. do you want them to post their psychiatrist saying they have DID for a tiktok to prove themselves to some randos on the internet. you're not entitled to proof of diagnosis in the first place because remember. you are a rando on the internet

"whoever diagnosed you is wrong" THANK YOU SO MUCH RANDO ON THE INTERNET FOR YOUR VALID RESEARCHED UNDIAGNOSIS VIA TIKTOK COMMENT. you've truly convinced us all

"but you're young" okay so when do you think DID starts. google that. hope that helps

"but you're too old" okay so when do you think DID stops.

"these are oc's" well yes ! so if your brain makes up people to cope. that would make them original. if those people can control your body and hold different parts of your memories and you can't control them. that would likely be alters.

"faking hurts actual systems" which part of faking hurts systems. the part where hoards of people harass someone they decided was faking? the part where hoards of people don't do any research say someone is faking for reasons they pulled out of their ass? what specifically hurts systems. when people don't fucking believe them and are assholes about it for no reason?? okay so then it's not the faking that hurts systems then. it's you! go take a nap and stop having temper tantrums in peoples comment sections. people trying to find themselves actually won't hurt you or systems nearly as much as your blatant harassment and ignorance. hope this helps xoxoxo❤️❤️❤️

istg y'all really lose it when someone with dyed hair and eyeliner is a little weird or confusing. you are no better than a boomer. pls get it together people are staring

#did #osdd 1a #osdd 1b #pdid #did system #pdid system #osdd system #osddid #dissociative identity disorder #partial did #partial dissociative identity disorder #handmadeorganicpost

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goldfishlover52 · 2 years ago

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INCOMING BOYGENIUS THEORY

so we all know cool about it. Ruined my life. I digress. So my theory begins with their three individual verses and how incredibly similar their word choices and metaphors are (as well as melodies and lyrics) to THEMSELVES

Juliens verse for example: dive bars, cowboys, tattoos, words like "fool" and "cruel" that are more commonly used in the south or more rural states. Her verse is so incredibly *her* that its ALMOST as if she's talking about herself.... wink wink

Lucys verse: very articulate word choices (which is common amongst her solo career music) as well as more deeply rooted, uncommonly used, unique, personalized metaphors and ways of phrasing her words as if she were DESCRIBING HERSELF. She writes most of her stuff in this manner. "I came prepared for absolution, if youd only ask" is one of my favorite lines ever and it beautifully represents lucys songwriting ability and style, and this style is very much HER... again... almost like shes talking about herself...... hhhmmmm

Phoebes verse is very closely related to her solo career music as well. Her metaphors, like lucy, are deeply rooted but not as analytical as lucy's. You dont need a whole lot of brain power and understanding to really know what she's trying to say. "I can walk you home and practice method acting, ill pretend being with you doesnt feel like drowning" is a verh good example of phoebe's writing. She uses "method acting" as a metaphor and then not even like two seconds later uses "ill pretend", which is obviously just telling the listener that she's faking emotion for the sake of the other person's feelings while KNOWING its hurting her inside.

And throwback to a theory i read a while ago on tiktok, god bless the person who came up with this, i do not remember your name;

This song could very well be about their individual coping methods and how they deal with things like breakups, depression and especially the feeling of losing someone. And although this song is applicable to a lot of scenarios, this song could be about themselves!!!!!!! Their coping mechanisms!!!!

- verse one, reminiscing, nostalgic, more of a bittersweet feeling is described in juliens verse.

- verse two, preparing for absolution (release from guilt, obligation or punishment; this definition is from google) but not getting it, preparing to let go but never letting go, lingering on the feeling until it consumes you!!!!!! Helllooooo!!!!!

- verse three, knowing this person is hurting you, lack of communication and a silent understanding of "we know that we should talk about this but we both know we never will" is ttttHHHORRRROUGHLY portrayed and explained.

Just HEAR ME OUT GUYS PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!

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amyelevenn · 7 months ago

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FORMULA ONE MASTERLIST

.・。.・゜✭・✧・✫・゜・。.

prompt list here : nav here

request on profile (someone pls tell me how to link it here 😭)

last updated: sep '24

angst (a), fluff (f), hurt/comfort (hc), mature (m)

.・。.・゜✭・✧・✫・゜・。.

ꕥ Max Verstappen

winter - 1.4k you struggle to cope with the cold, but max made it all the more easier. (f)

winner of what? - 3.7k Max thinks you are going to ruin his chance at a fifth WDC, and he can't let that happen. (a) (requested!)

It's the kind of cold, that fogs up windshield glass - 1.3k a miserable winters night finds you on Max's doorstep after months of no contact. (hc)

the knife cuts both ways - 1.2k a pre-race argument between you and Max has harsher consequences than either of you were anticipating. (a)

I cried like a baby coming home from the bar - 2.8k after losing your wallet during a bar crawl, you and Max go on a drunken adventure to find what has been lost.

ꕥ Lando Norris

post-race blues - 0.7k Lando's DNF deserves love and comfort from his partner. (hc)

chat am I cooked? - 1.1k Lando's chronically online girlfriend teases him for not knowing any tiktok brain rot. (f) (requested!)

ꕥ Oscar Piastri

All I know is that you drove us off the road - 1.8k Oscar insists on taking you to the airport after a race, but faces engine problems on the way there. (f)

ꕥ Charles Leclerc

a moment of warm sun - 0.6k you and Charles connect for a brief summer fling, spent lazing in the Mediterranean sun before the season finishes. (f)

.・。.・゜✭・✧・✫・゜・。.

#formula one #formula 1 #f1 #x reader #masterlist #f1 x reader #max verstappen #mv1 #lando norris #ln4

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kindheart525 · 1 year ago

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Do you have any really silly mane six headcanons

Twilight Sparkle once smoked weed during her equivalent of college and to this day is terrified that Celestia will find out (Celestia already knows)

Twilight has very little knowledge of memes and her friends frequently have to explain new slang to her before she causes political scandals (“no Twilight ‘kys’ does not mean ‘keep yourself safe’”)

Much like a real horse, Twilight often falls asleep standing up during her late-night stress & study sessions. Spike has had to wake her up and tell her to go to bed numerous times

Twilight was that kid who reminded her teachers there was homework when they forgot. Her classmates didn’t really like her for that

Her love life is very…active lol, including when she’s in a stable and committed relationship (like active within that relationship not as a serial cheater). She loves learning new techniques if you catch my drift

Fluttershy is surprisingly confident when she’s attracted to someone, and when she’s in a committed relationship she has a lot of fun facts about animal mating patterns to share with them for…no particular reason

Unlike Twilight, Flutters is surprisingly well-versed in memes because she’s learned a lot from Discord (and also Treehugger). She doesn’t really understand the humor in all of them but she’s aware of them

(In a universe where FlutterCord is canon) She had to absolutely fight for her life in the Mane 6 meetups when she told her friends she was dating/crushing on him

Daring Do eventually loses popularity, partly because so many of her books involve actual artifact theft and social attitudes have changed, and partly because ponies just moved on to newer book series. Rainbow Dash still remains her biggest die-hard fan even when she looks pathetic doing so

Rainbow Dash acts like a big baby every time Tank hibernates for the rest of her life (he outlives her) but after the first few years it’s kind of silly

This isn’t an idea I came up with but I really like all the jokes about RD writing really bad fanfiction, and it’s a headcanon I subscribe to

(Mostly a joke because I do ship her with mares outside of my next gens) Rainbow Dash is straight but has a lot of mares asking her out because of her mane, and it’s hard to get stallions because they also think she’s gay. She also has a hard time relating to her friends who all like mares

RD doesn’t take good care of her hooves because she flies all the time and forgets to trim them due to not walking very much. Because of this, they look funky and overgrown and her friends kind of clown on her for it

When she’s older, Rainbow Dash wrecks some of her joints trying to do stunts that she did when she was younger (like carrying her “little” sister). She has the worst midlife crisis out of all her friends

When Rarity was a filly, she used to create the most elaborate and dramatic plotlines with her dolls that easily measured up to any soap opera, with betrayals, love triangles, custody battles, the whole works

She enjoys listening to soul-crushingly sad music (like Marina’s discography) during her ice cream-crying sessions, in the process roleplaying a life much more dysfunctional than she has because it helps her cope with her actual problems. Also listens to that music in a good mood if she needs to be inspired for a certain fashion piece

She overstocks her supplies to a sometimes comical extent, like she has 400 refills for her bedazzler machine. How does she have room for all that stuff? A lady never reveals her secrets, darling✨

Applejack loves singing country songs like “Thank God I’m A Country Colt” and “International Harvester” at the top of her lungs, they literally never fail to get her hyped up

(In a human context, ignoring Equestria Girls) it took her awhile to learn that Apple Bloom had TikTok and other social media accounts because she only uses Facebook on her clunky home computer

AJ is incapable of enjoying any kind of sitcom because she’s always poking holes in the plot. Her least favorite storylines are the “caught in a lie” and general miscommunication tropes

She also can’t watch well-written, dramatic tv shows either if any of the characters behave dishonestly (such as Breaking Bad)

Pinkie and Cheese once performed “Amish Paradise” for her parents and sisters (even in universes where they aren’t a couple). Reactions were VERY mixed

Also some of my “how they explain the birds and the bees to their kids” headcanons for my next gens are pretty funny

Fluttershy is really good at explaining the whole life cycle (including reproduction and death) because taking care of so many animals means she’s seen it all. Nothing squicks her out anymore. She explains things matter-of-factly but gently as she guides her little ones through various examples involving her animals.

Twilight would do a good job and be comfortable with it but she would also go overboard, giving a college-level lecture about the full reproductive process when her 10 year old daughter only wanted to know what going into heat meant. Twi’s partner calls Fluttershy in to help for the kid’s sake.

Rarity buys her daughter the pony equivalent of those Care & Keeping of You books (and her son gets the male equivalent of those books). She uses those books to bond with her kids over “becoming a mare/stallion.”

Applejack is very overprotective of Apple Bloom and probably procrastinated on giving her “the talk” only to find out that AB already learned from the other CMC (especially Scoot “left completely unsupervised 24/7” aloo /hj). A similar deal would probably happen with her own kids as well unless her partner is better about it. Even though, years before, Granny Smith was very straight with AJ like “ya wanna know how our new batch of chicks was made?”

Pinkie isn’t uncomfortable with the talk at all, except her explanation gets so convoluted and off topic that her kids go off to ask someone else.

Rainbow Dash says “go ask your father”

#AskKind #KindsThoughts #mane 6 #twilight sparkle #fluttershy #rainbow dash #rarity #applejack #pinkie pie #headcanon #my little pony #mlp fim #mlp g4 #asks open #send asks #send me asks #ask me stuff #ask me things #ask me anything

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