#this is how I feel looking at them most of the time tbh

[coffeegnomee]

I finally finished the vod and BRO. derap just reminds me so much of eclipse zam. I think that's why i forgive all his wrongs. his leading questions, his wanting proof of change of zam choosing him over mapicc.

Derap has found himself on a team that he loves dearly. That he never wants to leave. That he refuses to leave. That was there for him at his lowest, and accepted him in when he had nothing. (and he feels like the anchor to keep zam from going evil, feels like he's making positive change on zam whom he was (and still is) convinced will go insane and evil if he doesn't take care of himself)

And every conversation he thinks zam will be the one to leave him. kick him out.

Every damn meeting in eclipse zam left being like "yippee im so glad they didn't kick me off the team!" completely, completely missing the concept that vi and subz desperately loved him and didn't want him to leave. the last thing they wanted was for eclipse to fall apart. they would change and adjust the plan as much as necessary to make zam know they wanted him to stay. that they wanted him to love the project they were working towards. and every time zam said he was okay with the plan again, they breathed a sign of relief.

But every day zam swallowed his own opinion and kept moving forward with the team. and freaking derapchu is doing the same thing. there have been so many instances of this, i could never list them all. zam thought of bringing his tree from spawn to zaun and derap almost said he hated how it looked and zam shouldn't build it, but swallowed that and said if zam wanted to build it he could. he said he wanted to start going on a murder spree and zam said he didn't want that at all, and next thing you know derap is saying he doesn't want to kill anymore. There's a hundred little instances of derap realizing his opinions differ from zam's wants and he shoves his own opinions away. if he doesn't, he will be kicked off the team.

And as derap tries to bring up what his concerns are, he shoves the responsibility for deciding the fate of the team on zam. Just like zam did. zam could not tell eclipse he wanted to leave, he wanted them to choose for him.

eclipse was doomed because zam had to face the fact that he couldn't put his needs last. that he couldn't just ignore what mattered most to him. period. and because he was terrible at confrontation and communication.

and somehow derap, despite founding this team precisely upon making zam realize he needs to put himself first and be selfish, doesn't realize he needs to do that too. and that he's not doing it. even if he rebuttled zam when zam brought that up. tbh imo he switched it up fast when zam brought that point up.

it does help that zam isn't lying to derap: unfortunately eclipse was keeping secrets from zam. big secrets.

But derap is convinced zam is still lying to him. he said it and then immediately went back on it.

And fundamentally, it was not so much that eclipse lied to zam about the wormhole, and more that zam thought they were lying when they said they weren't going to be the villains. he didn't believe that it was about protecting the three of them, not taking over the server. and it was always about protecting them. vi proved that in the end with banning himself and letting spoke completely take over the project.

There is a massive conflict of interest and a deep insecure distrust. and derap cannot admit how much that bothers him. he says he's fine with zam doing things with mapicc. he says he's just wants zam to be happy. but he is so desperately unhappy. no matter how much he insists on the opposite.

devotions only got their win (yipppe!!!) because zam refused to stop talking to mapicc and mapicc felt comfortable enough saying exactly what he thought. and then zam felt comfortable saying exactly what he thought too. both aired their real grievances, not shooting hypotheticals and asking only for the other to make choices about wether or not they would stay teamed. and it earned apologies and resolution all around. devotions w.

and mapicc compromised with zam, he didn't change his opinion for him. he still thinks mawn was good, did do good, doesn't want to let it go, but thinks it's done what it was meant to do. so he is letting it fade away. zam compromised with mapicc. he still thinks mawn was too much, that he can't join it, that he won't go against it, but thinks maybe it wasn't all bad. so he's going to help mapicc if mapicc needs help. W being secure in having your own opinions.

derap keeps changing his opinion for zam.

maybe they don't fall apart. derap is not zam. everybody is unique. but damn if the parallels aren't here and aren't looming like a storm cloud over it all.

[brella-boi]

Okay guys this is becoming a tradition of me seeing films recently so heres a

Sonic 3 review from a technical standpoint

Look im no film critic or anything, but i AM an animator and theres a lot of. Things. I see whether I want to or not. Its just how my brain is wired because of my profession lol

(This is full of spoilers btw so now's your time to fast scroll away)

Anyway lets begin!

The movie is great. Cool even. I liked it! But theres a lot of direction decision that I am just. Baffled by I guess?

First of all- the models are different. (Httyd ass moment) And the way they sculpted the characters lips absolutely destroys anything theyre trying to emote. It looks like theyre CONSTANTLY pursing their lips. Like they ate a lemon. Do you understand? Sonic also has much more pronounced brows which makes him look more pissed off constantly LOL

[Sonic 1 model vs sonic 3 models, pay attention to the lips]

Eggman and Dr Stone had possibly the best interactions in the entire movie. Their dynamic was fantastic, and I would argue they kinda carried the movie. Unfortunately! The ending left their issues unresolved. And Dr Stone looked entirely unbothered by the possible death of Eggman.

This brings me to some writing choices that I feel may be due to... Either infantalising or time cuts. The storyboarding of this film was just. God how do I even describe this. It feels like a lot of crucial scenes where cherry picked to be deleted between shots. Thats not good at all- and while character continuity WAS there, it really did feel like something crucial was missing in some scenes. This is especially evident in the Chao Garden scenes. Specifically when the general dies (WHY DOES HE DIE LIKE THAT. WE DIDNT EVEN SEE THE RUBBLE GO ANYWHERE OR PIN ANYONE DOWN OR SEE MASS PANIC FOR PEOPLE TO DIE?) The characters COMPLETELY gloss over his death- a death that feels like its out of a show for 8 year olds Im not going to lie to you. He just flops, delivers a line, and thats it.

It feels like the two halves of the movie were written by two different writers.

The first half is weak. The jokes are stale. And the storybeats almost feel off. The actions scenes- while there's nothing particularly offendish about them- don't *hit*. If you're an animator or writer you understand that important beats need to pack a punch. It was severely lacking in packing punches in the first half.

I also wanna speak to the animators. Are you okay? Was this made on tight deadlines? Where is the fun and whimsy? Did you outsource this? Did you give your workers a good environment or were they crunching and hating life? Or did you hire younger animators with no senior feedback because they're cheaper to hire?

Look, the animation is good. Just that. Its good. Its TV show standard, not movie standard. Its lacking a good push to the poses, its using slow keyframing between poses instead of it being snappy, with good silhouettes, with good visual gags. Instead were left with this.. subpar passable animation for every character instead of something energetic and snappy like Sonics personality. I think this is where I take the most issue with because guys come on. You didnt push the models to their limits at ALL. And Sonics speedy running is... Well read my previous points. Where are the fundamentals of animation about exaggeration? Not in Sonics run cycle.

The second half of the movie carried the first half on its back thanks to Eggman. I am SO GLAD to see giant spaceships and mechs and whatnot. Thats great! Loved to see the lovely mech models and once again- interactions between Eggman and Dr Stone. Id go as far as say they should be gay tbh (hello? The scene where theyre tied up?)

I didn't bring up Shadow entirely so far. And honestly Ive no notes about him. All my notes are entirely about just the animation and not hitting the beats well. His characterisation was great- it actually explains his aggression pretty well and then redemption. Genuinely the last arc of the movie was fantastic. And finally we got to hear a rock score to go with it. Maria was fun, the flashbacks were fun, the scientific exploration was fun. All in the second half of the movie of course!

My overall score is 6/10.

To untrained eyes the movie is going to be extremely fun- if a little more childish in some parts than others. I'm glad they took some risky moments, I'm glad the characterisation is well written. I just wish other aspects were tightened down, mainly animation and storyboarding.

6/10 but I never thought Id leave the cinema with the thoughts "I could storyboard some of these scenes in a lot more meaningful way, and Im not even a storyboarder."

I recommend a watch! Its not a bad movie. Its not a rock-it-out-of-the-park movie either though. I feel like maybe all the anticipation and high expectations maybe made it not as gut punching for me as it couldve been. Overall, all I can gleam from it is theres a lot of things to improve on! But nothing that really destroys it or makes it bad. Just a lot of room for improvement.

Thanks for reading!

[velvetvexations]

as an autistic trans man, sometimes I feel less safe in public presenting as a man than as a woman, because, especially in certain places, man + visibly autistic tends to be more often falsely read as "dangerous and predatory" than when people read me as a woman.

Yeah, as an autistic trans woman who doesn't pass, I feel that. <3

Honestly thank you so much for what you do on this app. I'm so glad there's people who are actually willing to stand with trans men instead of pulling the "um well I have it worse so do NOT talk about your own oppression EVER or else you're a transmisogynist!" I'm so happy I found your blog and I hope you have a great week <3

I hope you have a great week as well!

Eh a long while ago Chris Fleming made a video making fun of polyamorous people which used a lot of the same hurtful stereotypes society already perpetuates against us and I’ve not paid attention since

Noted, as someone who is also poly.

i wish the queer community didnt put so much emphasis on sexuality labels like i just want to have sex why do i need to put a word to it

very valid

about the dropout “discourse”: hot take but real life people are not representation. theyre people. real people are not queerbaiting you and real people happening to not be transfem (and I have literally seen transfems in some dropout episodes theyre just not part of the main cast) is not a lack of representation. these are real people. stop* *not you, the people being shitty about it

the complaint is not in any way coming from a genuine place tbh

hey! i just wanted to let you know how much your blog means to me as a trans guy. you and your reblogs have given me hope at trans unity, and lets me know that i-- that we-- aren't alone. so thank you for everything you do, and i greatly appreciate your support and look up to you 💛

Thank you. <3

i redownloaded etsy recently and seeing all the trans stuff saved to my favorites is so sad. i used to feel happy and proud and i wanted to be open about being transmasc. but since all the discourse got worse i just. cant bring myself to feel like it matters. it makes me feel like im trans and yet i will never matter the way other trans people do.

You do matter anon, I promise. I love you, you matter, and I'm glad you're here.

As a trans guy a lot of the self-ID'd TME transmascs weird me out so much. Like why do they all sound like "I am so strong and my power to Harm Women is immense. I could do it so much and I feel the pull to the Transmisogynist Dark Side but *unsheaths sword* I will protect them instead with my big strong testosterone arms from my fellow men" like what even is that. Who is into this.

it's so incredibly obviously bad but it reinforces some people's victim complexes so it's praxis now

a trans person will joke about their experience and a trf will jump in to assume theyre a white transmasc who has never ever faced any real difficulties for being trans

every time

Out of the many, many stupid ideas in this dumb discourse, I've finally decided the one I hate the most is that underlying implication that transmascs just aren't trans enough. It's so gross seeing people imply that we aren't really trans. Our dysphoria is minimal discomfort at most, apparently. I've seen people post about and imply that transmascs will never understand not feeling like a person or being unable to live a life pre transition and that's why we have privilege, i guess - are you kidding me? It's like our experiences are a joke to these people who are clearly so wrapped up in their online discourse bubble that they're just detached from what it's like for trans people as a whole. Sorry for the vent (would rather not post this on main and I don't have anyone to talk to) but it's just the most grating part. Also it's like. Low-key transmed shit. Thought we left that behind, c'mon.

transmeds are like ants they come back every summer

i wish TRFs had a label they proudly called themselves so i could jsut go through their tags and block them, but noooooo they HAVE to frame their transphobic bullshit as Brilliant Transfeminist Theory. like atleast radfems are fucking honest about being radfems

That's part of why I made antigonism a label for anti-TRFs to call themselves~!

[hee0soo]

How quick things can change...

Pairing — Kang Yeosang x Reader

Summary — A lot of things change in life. Some from good to bad and from bad to worse. And some go from worse to even worse real quick....

Genre — horror, angst

AU/Trope Info — SerialKiller au

Wordcount — 1.4k

Warnings — murder, manipulation, blood, knives, mention of guns, torture, death

Rating — NSFW ☕️☕️☕️☕️

A/N — @surveilenceysystem merry christmas and i hope you like your present... i know you said you like all things horror but writing this my mind went into some very dark places to the point i was scared it's to much. It's still a fear tbh

Anyways all the things you chose in your little game led to this and if you wanna know what everything meant then hit me up☺️

Disclaimer: this fic is written and copyrighted by ©hee0soo on tumblr. do not rewrite or repost on any other plattforms without my permission.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED!

A year ago your life had been simple.

Going to university, studying something you were passionate about while slaving away over course work and a side job to keep you afloat. It was hard but calm, almost to calm if not to say boring.

Yes, you were bored of your life as it was. The same routines, the same people and the same things being drilled into your head by your family and friends.

“Just concentrate on your studies! Go out with friends and be good.”

Be good.

Funny, and ironic when you thought back on it.

Nobody would think what had become of you ever since you had met him.

Kang Yeosang, finished with university, a bit older and with an aura that was darker than most souls would expect when seeing his sweet, innocent and almost ethereal beauty for the first time.

He hid it well.

The darkness that lingered in his eyes when he smiled. The things he said with the most innocent of voices sometimes, making it look like he didn´t know what he was talking about when the contrary was the case.

He was… fascinating…

Your friends after all this time had still not know what to make of him, but they knew one thing. You had changed and none of them like it.

And they were right. You did change. After all, a year ago you wouldn´t have reveled in the fear of girls trying to get away from your clutches, sending a shot of pure adrenaline through your veins and making you feel more a life then you had ever felt. It was liberating in a way. Watching as they struggled once they fell into the trap you had set with Yeosang, now your lover, dragging them away together to your own little fantasy land as the man called it.

Catching the blood that was running down the sobbing girl’s forehead with your thumb you grinned at her before sticking your finger into your mouth, licking the liquid of with such pleasure one would think you ate candy.

“Don´t worry darling, it would hurt all that much…” you grinned like a cat that caught her mouse, causing the shaking girl to whimper in fear when she couldn´t free herself from the bindings holding her in place.

Yeosang was sat in his favorite old bean bag that had more stitches then fabric holding it together, enjoying the way you played with the present you had been given by him. He had noticed how restless you had become since the last one, giving him the idea to for once let you do as you pleased with it. He watched as you trailed the butterfly knife he had given you once he had introduced you to his life down her throat before cutting into her skin.

The girl screamed in pure terror and pain at the blade cutting into her skin and he could feel his dick harden in his pants.

You cooed at her. Taunting her with sweet little words that did nothing but make you more excited for what you were going to do. He was proud to see what he had made out of you.

The once good a diligent girl was now a killer that precisely did what she needed to do without regret.

You took a knife away slowly, walked around the chair, circling like a lion did her pray, grabbing into her hair and puling harshly on it. The scared girl cried out and you reacted by plunging the blade into her back. Warm blood ran down her back, dripping onto the floor and staining the once white carpet underneath her dark.

The dried patches littering the fabric being proof that many had sat in the poor girls position already.

“Pleaseee… let me go… “She whimpered weakly after having calmed down a bit and you snickered.

“No.” you said and stabbed her once more. Her voice had given out, only little noises of pain slipping out at this point.

The injuries she had sustained making her weak, life bleeding out of her with every drop of blood she lost until she was quiet.

“Now that wasn´t much fun, was it? She was dead way to quick!” you complained with a huff. Yeosang laughed quietly.

“You´re too impatient baby. Drag it out more, let them feel their pain. Let them feel how their own blood grows cold as it spills all over the floor underneath them.”

You tilted your head to the side.

“You didn´t let that detective feel his blood grow cold when you shot him in that alley.”

Coming closer you sat in his lap and buried your head in his shoulder.

“I did that to give you a chance to get away, or would you have wanted me to let them catch you?”

You shook your head.

“See, that was a different situation.” Yeosang grabbed your face and forced you to look at him by the chin. “And I do not want you to get us into another one like that ever again… do we understand each other?”

Now in moments like this, even you felt the coldness of his demeanor and a shudder ran down your spine.

“Yes, I’m sorry!”

Yeosang nodded and his serious expression left as quickly as it had come. His hold softened, turning his hand and gently stroked the side of your face.

“Great! Now finish this up and then come join me in bed. It´s late already and listening to our new doll scream made me tired.” He smiled brightly and walked past you towards the door.

Yeosang was an enigma and sometimes his hot and cold behavior through you for a spin. Like right now. But you did as you were told. Cleaning away the blood splattered all over you, the floor and your different tools you had used on the poor, now dead girl held up by the chair.

Your lover, already ready to go to sleep looked like a teddy with his soft and fluffy pjs, hair falling over his eyes and pouting that you took too long for his taste. It threw you for a spin.

“I´m gonna- get ready…” you sighed, feeling his eyes follow you until the bathroom door closed behind you.

---------

It took everything in Yeosang not to let his eye twitch at your playing around with your food. This was not what he had taught you and quite frankly, it annoyed the fuck out of him that you seemed to be getting sloppy.

Almost bored by the sight of the night, he itched to get the spark of something new back. Something that brought back the thrill of killing. The adrenaline rush that made him feel alive again and gave him something to look forward to upon opening his eyes in the morning.

And try as he might, he couldn´t find that same spark anymore.

He watched your sleeping form by his side. Things had to change and there was only one thing he knew that could achieve that.  Now he just had to wait…

The next day both you and him got rid of the body a little outside of Seoul in a forest barely anyone ever went to. It was the ideal place for your little escapades to drown their evidence in a lake surrounded by trees.

His favorite knife that he liked to carry under his jacket safely hidden out of immediate sight as to not seem suspicious to any wandering hikers that could possibly encounter them.

The trash bag vanished in the deep and Yeosang turned to face you.

A year ago he had seen potential in those eyes of yours. Now he didn´t know what he saw anymore.

“What? Do I have something on my face?” you asked and whipped at your cheek.

No… he did know…

Reaching calmly underneath his jacket he whispered sickeningly sweet, “Run.”

Horrified you froze, not wanting to realize what his words meant. But knowing what laid under the padding of his jacket you knew exactly what was about to happen.

You spun around; dropping everything you were still holding and ran as fast as you could.

Stamina had never been your thing and the freezing winter air hurt your lungs as your legs threatened to give out underneath you but Yeosang was still hot on your heels and you were determined to win this race for, as ironic as this was, your life.

“Oh, come on baby, you know you can´t escaped.” Yeosang chuckled darkly from a few meters away. You couldn´t see him but you knew he was there. Panting you hid behind a thick tree to catch your breath, looking back to check constantly when you gasped in pain all of a sudden.

The knife, previously in Yeosang’s hand was sticking out of your side.

“I´m sorry it had to come to this, but things have changed…” he whispered into your ear before everything went dark.

[dearlot]

Fucking Sister Barnes over and over again with my biggest strap on until she squirts hard <3 bonus points if it's one of those strap ons with cum

-🙄

she loves the feeling of being stretched out <3 thinking of not even telling her it's a squirting strap until you cum inside of her and she goes absolutely crazy....!!! she makes the most beautiful noises ever as you squeeze the base and pour more cum into her and traps her legs around your waist so you cant pull away :3

i think she'd get obsessed with squirting straps tbh. whether it's on you or on her, she loves it. barnes who just cant seem to keep her mouth off your strap and milk every last drop of cum from your tip.... she uses you until you're all sweaty and tired, literally refilling the strap with lube so she can ride you for the 9th time @__@

getting her thick and big dildos, watching how her hole swallows it so greedily and begs for more. thinking about securing it somehow so she can walk with one of them inside of her in public 😁 hiding her face in your neck and it just looks like shes giving you nose kisses but she's whining about how good the cock feels in her pussy and how she's already cum 3 times :(

[callivich]

Hi Calli! How about #20 and #26 for the winter asks?

Hi Kat! 💖❄️

20. Who would win in a snowball fight?

I think Ian is great at making really good snowballs, really quickly. Mickey is great at throwing them really hard though. I think Ian is trying to play fairly (only throwing at Mickey’s body) and Mickey is the first one to play dirty (like throwing snowballs at Ian’s face or perhaps even another sensitive area…..) and once he starts doing this, Ian decides to play dirty too. I’m not sure there ends up being a clear winner, I feel like the snowball fight ends when they tackle each other and start shoving snow down each other’s pants. OR maybe they have so many snowball fights that they have to keep a running tally of who has won the most fights. Not sure what the winner eventually gets but it’s something dirty 😅

I also have another idea….maybe season 1? Where Mickey keeps stalking Ian around the neighbourhood, hiding and throwing snowballs at him. And Ian is so confused and pissed off at this mystery person who keeps throwing snowballs at him. But eventually he catches Mickey before he can duck down out of sight and he should be angry because this has been going on for weeks but he can’t be and they end up having an epic snowball fight.

26. Do either of them ever get roped into dressing up as Santa for Franny and Freddie? How does this go?

I think if anyone tried to get Mickey to do it, he’d tell them to fuck off. I don’t think Ian needs to be roped in, tbh. I can see him suggesting it post-canon. Maybe he’s feeling a little disconnected from the family, now that he and Mickey don’t live with them. They’re all going to spend Christmas Day together which is great! But Ian wants to do something a little extra, so he suggests dressing up as Santa and surprising Freddie and then Franny on Christmas Eve (maybe they’re all living in different places so Santa will be travelling around the South Side!) Lip, Tami and Debbie all think it’s a great idea. So, yeah, it’s Ian and he’s great at it. He does a silly voice and dresses up and brings the kids candy (probably too much candy if the disapproving looks from the adults are anything to go by, but it’s Christmas!) The kids have the best time and Ian feels really happy. Maybe it becomes a yearly tradition until they’re too old to believe in Santa anymore.

Mickey also loves Ian in the Santa suit for entirely different reasons e.g. my Christmas roleplay fic and @whatthebodygraspsnot’s magical Santa Comes Early fic.

[an-internet-introvert]

You guys ever just remember this in Phil’s video:

[disposal-blueeee]

from this thing lolz

ty to @cherry-207 for the idea !! XPP

vargas by zarla-s

[imminent-danger-came]

Lady Bone Demon: "I've seen it countless times before your meager existence. I've witnessed cities rise and fall. I've seen the world suffer famine, disease, war, and endless turmoil—an eternity of needless pain. I thought if I helped someone with real power, guided you to be better, I could make a true difference in the world! But I now see the only true way to create the perfect world, is to start with a clean slate."

(3x13 Time To Be Warriors)

-

Azure Lion: *laughs* "I'm flattered, truly, but...were it not for Sun Wukong bringing us all together, I- without you, none of this would be possible! Your courage to stand up to the celestial host has inspired us to finally take a stand, to make a true difference in the world! And I can think of none other more suitable to lead us on our conquest than you brother."

(4x02 New Adventures)

-

Make a true difference in the world.

[girlivealwaysbean]

it's not sinking in that today might be the last day in my house and town for many months to come

[sskk-manifesto]

Next time we should just skip over ep 3 and do a chapters 84-87 reread

[bunnyboy-juice]

spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner

[museenkuss]

loving and moving my body this week (06.11.-12.11.)*

Monday. 20 MIN EVENING PILATES TO RELAX AND FEEL CALM - EASY AT HOME WORKOUT

Tuesday. Beginners Belly Dance Tutorial | Beautiful Hips & Arms!

Wednesday. Everyday Pilates Mobility and Stretch | Posture, Hips and Hamstrings

Thursday. Victoria's Secret Train Like An Angel Live: Martha Hunt + Ballet Beautiful

Friday. 20 MIN FULL BODY PILATES WORKOUT FOR BEGINNERS - AT HOME PILATES or Waistline Shimmy | Belly Dance Workout

Saturday. 30 MIN FULL BODY PILATES WORKOUT FOR EVERYBODY - AT HOME PILATES

Sunday. "Chocoholics" Valentine's Day Waist Winding Workout

__

* the idea here was to find fun little ways to stay active according to my schedule this week. This is completely 'no suffering, joy only'. :)

In case the suggestion doesn't feel right for that day, here are some alternatives (12 minutes or less, can also be used as add-ons). No shame in taking it slow! Let's move according to our needs! :) nightime flexibility stretches // bedtime yoga stretch to release stress & tension // 8 min beginner's ballet flexibility. // 10 min | Beginner Belly Dance Workout | Slow & Smooth Tutorial // 15 min Gentle Pilates Workout For Beginners

[isan0rt]

I think one thing that really sticks with me in interpreting how Dark Road shapes Xehanort is the fact that Xehanort truly was raised to believe himself to be the only one truly strong enough to do what needs to be done to save the world. An interesting thing I think is to look at the way Xehanort’s apparent perception of Baldr changes after his world tour...but not really the crux of his feelings about Baldr, which is that I truly think he sees Baldr as pathetic, in both senses of the word.

Before the tour, Baldr evokes pathos from Xehanort. He feels sorry for him; he takes the time to leave flowers on his grave, but crucially, does not actually express regret for killing him. What he expresses is that he thinks this is the best outcome for Baldr; 

Xehanort: Baldr... Now you and your sister will always be together. You'll always have the light to share.

Killing Baldr was a mercy, from Xehanort’s perspective. Baldr wasn’t strong enough to handle the Darkness. He wasn’t strong enough to face a world of nuance alone. Not like Xehanort, who is determined to be strong enough. Who was born to be strong enough; who then decides to prove he’s strong enough by removing his armor in the space between worlds. 

Then, there is the comparison between Baldr’s dying words, and what Master of Masters and Xehanort express before and after his world tour:

??????: Let me guess... You thought your heart was strong enough to withstand the darkness in there.

??????: Human emotions are complex. For example, what you feel toward someone you love isn't always good or well-meaning. It can be a false kind of light. Which begs the question: are these messy feelings that emerge from love still light? Or are they darkness?

Baldr’s love for Hoder was a false kind of light. It was one that smothered, one that made her responsible for his well-being. Baldr can’t separate his own feelings from other people’s; his worldview is completely self-absorbed. Other people are having feelings at him; Hoder is there to spread her light at him. He can’t see beyond his own pain and his own needs, and what love he has for Hoder is really about what she can do for him; a love that isn’t good, or well-meaning, but toxic for both of them until it kills them both.

Xehanort knows this. His experience, as Master of Masters asks about, tells him this; he saw first-hand how that false love destroyed both Hoder and Baldr, and their classmates as collateral damage.

Baldr’s last words have this to say:

Baldr: Xehanort... Do you see now? There's them...and there's us. When we find the strength to pursue our goals, they condemn us, insisting that our strength comes from darkness.

Then Xehanort goes on his world tour (and it seems strongly implied that he travels to the future during this time, experiences Dream Drop Distance and Kingdom Hearts 3, and comes back with those memories erased, but changed by the experience);

Xehanort: Those who are weak, and who desire greater power, simply strip the strong of their power, and convince themselves they've earned it. That's how people become tainted by darkness. They believe what they want to believe, using hollow reasons as justification. They repeat this cycle, and their darkness grows.

??????: So you're saying the weak feel the need to justify their actions to maintain a sense of self. Can't let that slide?

Xehanort: No, it's better they be ruled by darkness. People carry delusions of having power, but it's a lie. 

Baldr is the sheep pretending to be a wolf, slaughtering their friends to build his own power through the act. Baldr no longer evokes ‘pathos;’ now, for Xehanort, he is the other definition of ‘pathetic;’ “miserably inadequate, of very low standard.” Xehanort’s opinion is now that Baldr was too weak to handle being weaker than Hoder, being weaker than his classmates, so he killed them all, and pretended that made him strong. He told himself lies about how they were feeling things at him, and how that justified what he chose to do.

Xehanort looks down on him. Xehanort will be better than him. Xehanort is truly strong, he believes; all his life, he’s been practicing control. Managing his own feelings. Keeping them separate from those of others, not allowing them to be tainted by the emotions around him. Being flawless, to be the change he was born to be. He will do what’s necessary to make sure nothing like Baldr can ever happen again, and he won’t let feelings get in the way. It’s the reason for his existence, after all.

What comes next is too important.

[snobwhimsicality]

hello chat i am going to be a hater in tags for a moment (jst finished natlan act IV)

[quirkle2]

I was wondering if there are any rare happy ritsu moments in ur zombie au since hes always miserable I think,, like is he always miserable or is he happy/not miserable and feeling kinda good sometimes?

VWHDGDGD NO YEAH OFC HE'S HAPPY SOMETIMES im just horrible and enjoy putting him through misery

ive never been able to get a genuine smile to look right on his face in my art style either i think thats part of it. as ive said his face is just built to be mildly uncomfortable and bothered and i lean into it sm it's starting to get kinda funny

but yes ritsu is happy plenty! i think, canonically, he just seems like the type of person to me that tends to turn lemonade back into lemons. he's easy to scare and his first reaction to things is often Dread and Anxiety. he dwells on the negatives a lot and seems to be a "hope for the best, expect the worst," kinda guy, but there's a section in this post abt shigeo always loving the little things in life, and ritsu steadily learns throughout the journey on how to do that and how healing it can rly be. even if he had to grow up too fast during this whole thing and learn things a kid should never have to, the journey also gave him some good insight and lessons in other places! ritsu is smart, he figures it all out

in terms of little things here n there he's the happiest lil guy on the planet when he finds one of his favorite foods—swings his legs while he sits and munches on a kitkat bar like he's got absolutely nothin in the world to worry abt. sometimes mob does smth funny that he laughs at; for the longest time i've had this silly image in my head of mob accidentally knocking down a bucket from a store shelf and it lands on his head and he just kinda stands there and makes noises.when the noises continue out of pure curiosity about the weird echoey quality it's giving them ritsu cannot help but lose it

besides tiny things tho, when tome comes around ritsu in general is a lot happier, just cuz he has somebody to talk to that will actually respond in some way. they're sorta reluctant partners in crime at first (at least on ritsu's end) but over time and over bonding they grow to rly like each other's presence. they bicker constantly but it's almost always fond eventually, and they shove each other and playfight until mob gets antsy enough to get worked up about it. rly, tome is a godsend to ritsu's mental health—after months and months of being effectively alone with his thoughts, he finally has another person to converse with. a person His Age, too!

tome is rly good at knowing when ritsu is thinkin himself into oblivion and she's Also rly good at being the most annoying girl on the planet to yank him outta that and replace any misery with Oh My God Get Off Me You Freak. she doesn't even do this on purpose at first, but over time she learns how to tell when he's thinking too hard and, ofc, she's grown attached and she cares, so she's as obnoxious as possible to lighten the mood

when they find reigen n teru, ritsu gradually gets Much happier still. now that he knows they're safe and the gang is finally back together (and now that there's an Adult present and he can relax a lil and let himself be taken care of) his stress levels r exponentially lowered. having teru back is another instant lift to his mood—im always a big fan of teru and ritsu friendship, and i think adding tome to their dynamic simply makes it more chaotic. truly a trio of the 3 most normal teenagers in existence which will surely bring nothing but good (reigen sweats offscreen)

actually this makes me feel bad for forever torturing him im gonna go draw happy zau ritsus brb ,.,.ok imback <3