#this horrible goose that I adore
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your duck doodle comics have really made me love gladstone
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There are two birds that enjoy a solid romantic reputation, and I'm here to say that in both of their cases it is entirely undeserved.
Firstly, the nightingale.
Expectation:
youtube
Reality, usually happening roughly 10 meters from your ear in the dead of the night at small foghorn intensity:
The second one is the mute swan, widely regarded as the very symbol of committed romantic love.
Expectation:
Reality, armed with feathered clubs and a pervasive smell of half-digested plant-matter:
That is all.
#i'm a fan of birds#shitpost brought to you by the nighttime concerto that's keeping me awake#make no mistake I adore both species - but one is like a bargain bin bellbird and the other is in fact a horrible goose#shut up already I want to sleep
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Three for One 3
Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as dubcon/noncon, cheating, customer service abuse, and other possible triggers. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.
This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.
Summary: As a customer service associate, you’re used to work with a wide variety of characters. Your efforts to go above and beyond draw the attention of a certain set of customers who want more than what’s on the shelf.
Character: Andy Barber, Lloyd Hansen, Ransom Drysdale
Note: Let's go!
As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me <3
Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)
Love you all. Take care. 💖
Two days before Christmas. The store is left in tatters. Shelves strewn with sparse lefftovers and aisles hastily paced by those who left their shopping a bit too late. The frantic shoppers searching for a diamond among the sand grains of untouched product.
You work at arranging the remnants of the season’s beauty advent calendars on a table draped in a bright red cloth. There’s a large tag in a metal stand that marks them as ten percent off. On the other side of the holidays, they will drop to a full eighty percent off. You always believed giftcards were a better prize, not that you got many gifts.
That year, Luanne gave you a new journal and a specialty hot chocolate bomb in the department’s secret santa. You go Michelle and gifted her a copy of your favourite novel and some nail polishes. That is the extent of your shopping and gift exchanges. Except for your puppy, Ernie, who will get a bone and one of those special gourmet dog meals.
You finish your arrangement and step back, admiring your work. It’s close to close and so close to the end of the race that the shop isn’t as busy as usual. The only customers you do see are in a rush and horribly disappointed when that very specific thing isn’t in stock.
“Excuse me,” you’re drawn around the deep voice. A man strolls up the center aisle of the beauty section, the tails of his coat flicking behind him, “hi,” he uses your name as he approaches, “I’m so sorry to bother you again but can you point me to, erm,” he looks down at his phone, “a ring light?”
You hesitate. He seems to know you and you admit, he looks familiar. You’re at that point where the faces all blur together. Your one innate flaw is that you really don’t have a good memory for that, bt you definitely recognise his voice.
“Hello, sir,” you fall short of his name. You want to say Alan but you also don’t want to be wrong. “The ring lights are actually with the cellphone.” You gesture back at electronics, “I know it makes more sense to put them with cameras.”
“Ah, oh, thanks,” he nods but doesn’t move to find his quarry, he lowers his phone, “how’s your holiday going? Thing’s slowing down,” he looks around and you can’t help but do the same.
“Uh, yeah, yeah, most people are all done,” you shrug.
“Ha, wish I could say the same,” he sighs, “I thought we were done but the wife just sent me on a wild goose chase.”
“Hm, oh, well, I’m not very busy, did you need help finding anything else?”
“Really?”
“Yeah, my manager’s done for the day so doesn’t really matter if I leave my zone,” you say, “kinda boring around here.”
“You’re too sweet,” he smiles, his blue eyes deep and swirling, “and that sweater is adorable.”
You look down at your dark blue sweater with the white crochet peter pan collar. You wiggle your shoulders and grin back at him, thanking him. You know he bought some perfume for his wife but you’re still blanking on his name.
“Here’s my list,” he tilts his phone towards you and looks down, shifting closer to you as he shows you a text bubble.
“Oh my, right. I’m not sure we’ll have everything,” you teethe your lip as you go through the items, “but we’ll see.”
A message pops up over the top and you try not to read, putting your head up as you try to act like you didn’t see it. It’s not that you meant to decipher the words but your brain quickly skimmed that ‘tomorrow night?’ Not much but just feels a bit personal.
“Alright, we’ll go to electronics first, then work our way forward,” you suggest.
“Good idea,” he agrees.
You set off and he follows at just a step. You have to remember to slow down as often you’re so determined you find yourself leaving your customers far behind you. You bring him to the mobile accessories and point to the ring lights.
He considers them and rubs his chin. He points between two; “what’s the difference?”
“Oh, this one comes with a tripod extension and this one is a full kit with a mic,” you point from one to the other.
“What do you think is better for, uh, streaming?” He sounds unsure of that last word.
“I think that kit would have more to it, especially if whoever it’s for is just starting out. But I’m don’t know too much about these things.”
“I’ll take the kit,” he scoops it off the shelf, “the kid can never have enough.”
“Oh? You have kids?”
“One,” he sounds less than excited, “teenager now so he really can’t stand me.”
“I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t mean to…”
“No, no, it’s not your fault,” he forces away the shadow across his features, “you know how they can be. What about you? You going to see your parents? Spending the day with someone special?”
“Um, just Ernie,” you answer, “my puppy.”
“Cute,” he remarks, “are you guys open tomorrow?”
“Tomorrow, yeah, ‘til five,” you try to remember the next thing on his list.
He seems less concerned with the items than before, instead turn to examine a pop socket, “you have to work on Christmas Eve?”
“Yeah, closing, but I don’t mind.”
“What’s this?” He holds up a pop socket.
“It goes on your phone,” you pull out your phone and show him your daisy one, “see?” You hook your fingers around it, “it’s a grip to help you hold on.”
“Ah, makes sense,” he turns the thin package over, “kid’s always breaking his screen…”
You wait patiently as he makes up the mind to add the grip to his haul.
“What’s next?” You prompt as gently as you can.
“Oh, uh,” he looks at his phone, “video games…” he squints, “V-bucks?”
“Ah, yes, that would be a gift card,” you say, “I can show you the rack.”
He lets you lead him to the large rack of subscription cards. You point out the various currency amounts available and he rubs his brow. His forehead lines as you see the stress needling in his cheek. He’s struck with the late shopper syndrome. He’s start to feel the crush of time.
“So, just your dog?” He wonders as he picks up a $75 card.
“Yeah,” you answer softly.
“No boyfriend? Siblings?”
“Just me,” you assure him, “I don’t mind. I get to choose the dessert!”
He chuckles, “that’s a good way to look at it. Did you buy yourself something special?”
“Not really, I’ve been saving for a vacation so I put most of my overtime into that,” you explain. “You having a big dinner?”
“Last minute change, wife’s parents want to host. Had to figure out travel plans.” He looks at the giftcards again and your eyes fall to the large back curled up in his arm and the card and phone grip balanced between his fingers. He slides free a Netflix card and reads the fine print.
“Do you want a basket, sir?” You offer.
“Oh, well, sure,” he accepts as he looks down, “that’s very considerate.”
“Don’t want you to drop anything,” you smile and turn on your heel.
You go to the stack of rolling baskets beside the electronics desk. Tyler doesn’t acknowledge you as he sorts through game shells to put back on the shelf. You pull the basket behind you, rattling on its wheels as you approach the shopper by the gift cards.
“Here,” you veer it around towards him.
He bends to lower the ringlight inside and drops the smaller items into next to it; he adds the Netflix subscription along with it and holds onto the Kindle card in his hand.
“You got any of these around?” He holds up the card, “the reader?”
“Hmm, we should,” you rub your neck, “I suppose if we didn’t, you can get a tablet and download the app.”
“I guess,” he nods, “can you check?”
“Of course, sir.”
You turn away and call over your headset. Regan tells you there’s a kindle up in return they can sell. You ask them to put it aside.
“There’s one left at checkout. They’re going to have it waiting for you,” you announce proudly.
“That’s great. You like to read?” He asks.
“Oh, sure, my one vice is my book addiction,” you giggle, “how about you?”
“Well, I don’t get much of a chance with work. I’m usually burnt out from all the legal documents,” he drones grimly, “then the kid has extracurriculars or there’s a PTA meeting or the wife needs something done.”
“Sounds busy,” you say empathetically, “I hope you get some time to relax this holiday.”
“Me too,” he agrees. “I almost envy you. I’m sure your dog’s good company.”
“He’s so sweet,” you can’t help but beam at the mention of your boy.
“Big cuddler?” He asks.
“Uh, yeah,” the question is a bit unexpected, “you like dogs?”
“Never really had one. Don’t need the extra work,” he says, “but I don’t mind them.”
“That’s fair. He can be a bit needy.”
He flinches and looks down at his hand. His screen flashes and he gives an apologetic look as he raises his palm, “I’m so sorry. I need to take this.”
“Take your time, sir, I’ll wander,” you point over your shoulder with your thumb.
He mouths a thanks before he answers, “Barber.”
You back up and turn to distract yourself with the shelf of controllers and switch cases. His deep voice carries but you focus on the Sinatra carol playing overhead to drown him out. Still you can’t help but catch a few words.
“Five, yeah…no, she won’t…it’s fine…” He’s quiet for a moment before he raises his voice, “figure it out.”
His stern tone sends a chill through you. It’s a sharp contrast to his previously friendly demeanour. Well, he mentioned he’s a lawyer, you assume he has a lawyer voice, akin to your customer service one.
“Sorry,” he comes back to you, “my wife…” he takes a breath, “you don’t happen to sell wine here?”
You smile. The way he answered, it didn’t sound very affectionate but maybe he hadn’t expected his wife.
“No, sorry, sir.”
“Kidding,” he chuckles, “well, I guess I should get my butt in gear,” he flicks through his phone, “um, I assume toiletries? Face masks?”
“Oh, that’s near me,” you point back towards beauty, “there’s a special for the sheet masks.”
“Great,” he grabs the extended handle of the basket, “thanks so much for this. I’m so lost.”
“That’s fine,” you go ahead of him, “it’s the job.”
🎀
You groan as you put the last empty bin in the stack. You stand and rub your shoulders, traps sore from all the lifting and moving. The night crew will set up for the day after Christmas but in the last hour of work, you and the few others in the store scrambled to get the old displays torn down.
Luanne walks with you to the employee break room. She’s in more of a hurry as she has her three children waiting for her at their grandparents. She goes ahead of you and punches out as you wait and stretch out your arms.
“Have a good Christmas,” she says breathily as she opens her locker and pulls out her purse and jacket, folding the latter over her arm, “I’ll see you after. You’re opening, right?”
“Sure thing,” you say as you punch in your employee number. “Merry Christmas.”
“Give Ernie some pets for me,” she trills as she goes to the door. “Thanks again. You saved my ass today.”
“No problem, “ you shake your head, “Christmas Eve brings out the best.”
“Does it ever. Bye, sweetie,” she waves over her shoulder as he sweeps through the door.
You go to your locket and take out your fluffy pink sherpa coat and purse. You loop your scarf around your neck and slip your earmuffs around your head. You sit to pull on your boots and stand with an ache in your calves. You feel the fatigue finally setting in. It’s not over yet; one day off and you’re right back to the furor.
You yawn as you leave the breakroom and drag your feet across the store. You take out your phone as you pop your earbuds in and choose your holiday mix. You wave goodbye to a few other stragglers and go out the front door, Spencer locking it behind you.
It’s bitterly cold out. You’re surprised by the fresh fall of snow swirling in the air. It gives an extra sparkle to the time of year.
You scroll through your phone. The buses are on holiday hours already. The next one is in an hour. Great. You can just walk, at least until you get to the next stop. More buses stop there and you can get at least ten minutes within your building.
You trod along, kicking through the powder of snow as headlights gleam ahead of you. You walk along the narrow walk beside the hotel on the other side of the intersection and a pair of flashing tail lights blink ahead of you. A dark figure stands beside the white SUV but you can’t make out much more than their silhouette.
You keep going, peeking up curiously as you near. The boot of the car pops up and the stranded driver searches. As you pass, you trip over an unseen shape, the metal clank painfully against your toe. You look down at the small foot jack.
“Oh, shoot, sorry,” the man stands straight and turns to you, “I didn’t see you coming. I was just grabbing the iron–”
“That’s okay,” you pick out your earbuds, “I wasn’t looking.”
“Wait,” he stops short and points a gloved finger in your direction, “it’s you. You work at the store just down the way, right?”
You know the man. He’s the one who was in the store just yesterday. There’s a flutter in your chest at the coincidence of your encounter. It happens, especially in the shopping district. Half the city at least passes through her during the holidays.
“Yeah, uh, that’s me. You finish your shopping?”
“Just about,” he tuts and shakes his head, “blew a tire. So, happy holidays to me.”
“I’m so sorry,” you look down at the snowy walk.
“Mhmm,” he grumbles, “all this snow, I can’t get the jack to work either.”
“Dang, unfortunately, I’m not help. I don’t know much about cars.”
“That’s fine, I called roadside assistance but they’re taking their damn time,” he checks his watch.
“Oh…” you utter.
“Don’t let me rain on your holiday, honey,” he says, “your toe okay?”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s fine,” you look down.
“Wait, are you walking home?” He asks.
You nod.
“Wish I could offer you a ride. This weather’s only getting worse,” he bemoans. He slips his hand into his jacket and pulls out his phone, “they should be here shortly so if–”
A set of headlights pull onto the apron and roll towards you. You look over as the man beside you does the same. You stand, somewhat dumbfounded at the unexpected run-in.
“That’s them,” he declares, “hey, guys.”
He waves as the white van pulls up. You were expecting a tow truck. Oh, well. Not your problem.
“Great, I guess I should get going,” you excuse yourself, “have a happy holi–”
As you step back, your heel catches on something. You don’t realise until your plummeting onto your ass that the man stuck his leg out behind you. You hit the ground with an oomph, barely missing the metal jack half-buried in the snow.
You hear the van door sliding open and a clatter of heavy treads. You can barely catch your breath as the world moves fast around you. The man bends over you as another rushes over, grabbing you off the ground as the two vehicles block out the street from view.
“Be nice,” the first man warns as your arms are seized. “Don’t hurt her.”
You suck in a deep breath. What is happening? You go to let out the shriek as you’re struck by the situation. This can’t be real but you’re being half-carried towards an open vehicle. A hand comes up and stifles your scream, smothering you as you’re yanked harshly forward.
“Careful,” the man girds again.
“Shut the fuck up,” the other grits and pulls you away from the other, spinning you around as he hooks an arm around your neck and covers your mouth, forcing you towards the van. He bends backwards, lifting your feet as you kick and squirm.
“Honey, calm down,” the friendly customer coaxes, “it’s okay.”
You don’t understand. Why are they doing this? Why you?
The man’s hand slips as you grab at his arms and your teeth come over the vee between thumb and index. You bite down and he yowls. Even through his leather glove, you give him a viscous pinch.
“Fuck!” He tosses you forward so your knees hit the side of the van and fall half-inside.
“Hurry the fuck up,” another voice calls from inside the van.
“Trying,” the second man snarls as you stand and let out a shrill note, only for a second before you’re caught from behind and muted again. This time the leather glove seals over your nose. “Fucking bitch.”
You’re lifted into the van, writhing and kicking as the door slides shut from the outside. You’re pinned on the floor in the seatless rear of the vehicle. You whimper as your eyes glisten with a sudden spring of tears.
That question rings in your head again; why you? You have no one to look for you, no one to care. It’s only you against them.
#andy barber#lloyd hansen#ransom drysdale#dark andy barber#dark!andy barber#dark lloyd hansen#dark!lloyd hasnen#dark!ransom drysdale#dark ransom drysdale#andy barber x reader#lloyd hansen x reader#ransom drysdale x reader#knives out#the gray man#defending jacob#fic#dark fic#dark!fic#series#multicharacter#multifandom#three for one#au
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Too Big For His Britches
I've been teasing @pinkducttape a little too much lately. As a self-imposed punishment (the joy of being a switch is that I get to be my own Dom) I wrote this horrible story staring myself, my imaginary Mommy, @pinkducttape, and their awesome Daddy, Midnight. Enjoy my attonement, I guess?
Today, I was feeling BIG! Mommy, my wife, had been so proud of me using the potty and staying accident free for the last week that she decided it was finally time for me to graduate from pull-ups to big kid undies!
Should have I felt embarrassed that, as a 32-year-old man, being allowed to wear a pair of Spider-Man underwear by my wife felt like a massive victory? Probably.
Did I? No.
The feeling of the soft cotton underwear under the jean shorts Mommy had dressed me in was far superior to the warm, bulky feel of the training pants and diapers I was now, much to used to. How could I not feel happy with my new found freedom?
Adding to my excitement was that today, the day I had graduated from 'Little' to 'Middle,' Mommy was taking me on a playdate! I was going to get to go hang out with Sunset, one of my best friends, while Mommy hung out with their Daddy, Midnight. I just knew that Little Sunsie was going to still be waddling around in diapers, while I would get to show off just how much of a big kid I was to them. It was going to be great!
It didn't take long for us to get to the secluded park where Mommy always took me for my playdates. I sat in the backseat, idly sucking my thumb while I thought about how I was going to tease my friend for still being a stinky little, while I, on the other hand, was a much more mature big kid. My wandering thoughts were interrupted by Mommy's voice.
"Baby Bean, are you drinking your water like you're supposed to be? It's going to be hot out there, and I don't want you getting dehydrated!"
I groaned as I popped my thumb out of my mouth and reached for my Bluey-themed water bottle in the cup holder. Didn't Mommy know I was a big kid? She's the one who held out my big kid undies for me to step into this morning for goose's sake! I didn't need to be reminded to drink water like some silly little baby. But, talking back wasn't worth the fight, not on a day like today. Plus, Mommy was right, as usual. It was really hot outside, and I was feeling thirsty just sitting in the car. There wasn't any harm in doing what she asked, just this one time. Having made up my mind, I replaced my thumb with the nipple of my water bottle and sucked down its contents as we drew closer to the park.
As usual, when we got to our destination, there was only one other car in the parking lot. Mommy and I both recognized it immediately. The pink and rainbow duct tape decorating it was a dead giveaway.
"Look, Baby Bean! Sunsie and Midnight are already here," Mommy said as she parked the car next to our friends' vehicle. She then turned back to me, staring at me sternly, "Now, I know you've earned the right to be a big boy today, but that does not mean you get to be rude. Make sure to be nice to Sunsie. They can't help being an adorable little pamper packer. Also, do not forget to come and tell me when you need me to take you to the potty. Got it?"
I nodded my head up and down in affirmation, happy that my Bluey water bottle hid the blush forming on my cheeks from the mention of asking Mommy to take me to the potty. And, when I nodded my head, agreeing to be nice to Sunset and ask to use the potty, I really meant it. Just because I was planning on teasing Baby Sunsie just a little, didn't mean I wasn't going to be nice to them!
I waited patiently as Mommy walked around the back of the car, opened the door and unbuckled my seat belt. Immediately, I sprinted past Mommy towards the mostly abandoned playground where I knew Sunset would be playing.
"Suuuuunnnnnssssssiiiiiiieeeeeee! We're here!" I yelled exhuberantly as I spotted my friend, sitting in the sandbox in a pastel yellow t-shirt and a pair of jean shortalls that did little to hide the thick diaper bulging at their waist. I was so excited, I didn't notice the pressure building in my bladder as I greeted my friend with a big, uncoordinated hug.
Midnight watched, smiling from their perch on a nearby park bench as I tackled Sunset into the sand in my excitement. From a distance behind me, I could hear my Mommy yelling out with an exasperated tone.
"Maddie! Careful! Don't hurt poor, little Sunsie!" She yelled breathlessly as she ran up behind me.
Sunset, for their part, was overjoyed to see me. They giggled as I wrapped my arms around them and accidentally knocked them over.
Midnight, with a better vantage of what was going on, immediately replied to my Mommy, "Oh, don't worry! It's just kids being kids! Now, get over here! We've got some catching up to do!"
The adults faded out of my awareness as Sunset and I righted ourselves, giggling in the sandbox. Sunset had clearly come prepared to play with all of their toys. Trucks, blocks, dolls, dinosaurs, and tractors were strewn about the sandy landscape my friend had constructed.
"Sunset, Sunset! Guess what?!" I asked, my excitement overflowing.
Sunset rolled their eyes at my bubbliness, but grinned good-naturedly at my excitement. "What 'Baby Bean?'" they asked, teasing me with my Mommy's nickname for me.
"That's just it!" I responded, ignoring the barb, "I'm not a baby anymore! Look! Mommy's letting me wear undies!"
I pulled down the elastic waist band of my jean shorts revealing the front of the cotton Spider-Man underwear I was wearing. Sunset's eyes grew wide. A grin spread across my face as I saw the hints of both jealousy and admiration I was hoping see in my friend's demeanor.
"That's right," I said, letting the elastic waistband of my shorts snap back into place, "no more diapers, or pull-ups, or training potties! I'm a real big boy now! I bet your Daddy will even let me babysit your stinky bottom soon!" I stuck my tongue out to emphasize my point.
As I spoke, I started to squirm uncomfortably. I felt a mounting pressure in my bladder, but it wasn't anything urgent enough to deal with yet. I couldn't leave to go potty now, just as I was starting to rub my new status in my friend's face.
"Yep, I bet it'll only be a couple weeks before I'm holding your leash, droppin' you off at daycare, before I get to go back to my REAL job!" I continued to tease Sunset. I couldn't tell if their face was getting red out of embarrassment or anger, but, frankly, high on my own increased status, I didn't care.
"Stop it, Maddie! It's cool you get to wear undies and all, but you're still just a baby like me! Nobody's gonna let you be a babysitter! You're not 'sponsible enough!" Sunset spat out unconvincingly, a hint of concern that their friend of once equal status could turn into yet another caregiver.
"Oh, Sunsie," I said, trying my best to imitate the condescending tone my Mommy used with me when I got high and mighty, "I'm not a baby like you though! Look at me, sitting in my big kid underwear. And look at you, I bet your diapers so soggy you're about to leak."
I extended one hand over to Subset's diapered crotch and squeezed it for emphasis. Too my utter delight, it was thoroughly soaked. Sunset, suddenly aware of the disastrous state of their diaper, turned bright red at my touch and tried to back away but only succeeded at falling on their back in the sand again.
"Aw! Did Little Sunsie fall down and go boom? Does the little baby in their soggy diaper not like being checked? Is it cause you want to keep playing in it like an icky little toddler? Is that why you don't wanna potty train and be a big kid like me?" I hovered over Sunset as I teased them, loving every second of watching their skin turn as red as a tomato out of fear, rage, and shame.
As I teased, Sunset couldn't even get a word out from where they lay in the sandbox. "I… No… Not… Baby… Gah… Big Kid… Diap…." Sunset's sputtering then suddenly stopped, and a big grin spread across their face. Unfortunately, I didn't notice it.
"Aw, is the little baby too little to talk! That's ok! Maybe I can go get your paci from your Daddy. Babies who waddle around in soggy pants like you shouldn't be talking like a big kid like me anyway!"
I couldn't stop. I was channeling all of the repressed anger and shame I had bottled up over the last few years as Mommy's perfect little pamper-packing, stuffy-humper. I was ready to throw every insult and taunt I had ever heard at Sunset, my friend, just so I could feel bigger and more powerful than someone else. I was becoming a monster in superhero underoos.
Luckily for me and my friendship with Sunsie, my reign of terror was cut short. From behind me, a familiar voice spoke.
"Beanie Baby! I did not just catch you bullying sweet little Sunsie. Come with me!"
As Mommy grabbed me by the ear, yanking me away, Sunset started laughing maniacally as they laid in the sand, excited to watch Mommy deliver whatever diabolical punishment I had earned.
I whined as Mommy dragged me across the park by my ear. "Owie! Mommy! This hurts! I didn't do nothing! I just said the truth."
"Madison James! I don't want to hear it. I heard what you were telling poor Baby Sunsie over there, and it was not acceptable!" Mommy lectured as she pulled me.
My bladder was starting to ache. The nervousness and fear of my punishment only adding to my desperation. I decided to change tack.
"Mommy! I hafta go potty!" I wailed, hoping my growing desperation to pee could distract my wife from my punishment.
It didn't.
"Well, if you're as big a kid as you were telling Sunset over there, you should have no problem holding it while you're being punished."
A new panic struck me as I suddenly realized that I might not be able to do that. I didn't want to go back to pull-ups, let alone diapers like Sunset because I had an accident while in time out!
I struggled uselessly against the grip Mommy had on my ear as she dragged me to the tree nearest to the playground.
"Nose to the tree. Now!" Mommy said as we reached our destination.
Rubbing my sore ear, I did as I was told, feeling the rough bark scrape against the tip of my nose.
"You have more than earned yourself a time out little one! Bullying poor Sunsie! In front of their Daddy! Do you know how embarrassed I am of you, Little Man? Do you know how bad you made me look as a Mommy and a wife?"
A tear rolled down my cheek as my wife explained how my actions made her feel. How could I have been so careless and thoughtless to not think about how my actions reflected on her? Midnight was one of her best friends, and I had embarrassed her in front of them. Maybe I was nothing more than the thoughtless child she thought of me as.
Mommy saw my tears and, instead of comforting me, leaned into my suffering.
"That's right baby, you embarrassed Mommy. You made Mommy look bad. You made Mommy look like she can't control you. I want you to think about that while you stand here for the next, oh, let's say, 30 minutes."
"30 minutes…" I tried to protest, but before I could say more, a pacifier was shoved in my mouth.
"No talking during time out. That stays in. And yes, 30 minutes," Mommy said sternly.
I grumbled behind my pacifier as I silently calculated whether I could actually keep from wetting myself for that long. Before I could come up with a plan to both stay put and dry, my thoughts were interrupted by the familiar feeling of my shorts being pulled down to my ankles.
"Oh, and since you were so proud of these undies, mister," my wife said from behind me, "I think it's only fair you get to show them off for your whole time out."
I was glad my face was towards the tree as a deep red blush bloomed across my cheeks. I could perfectly picture my cotton clad ass on display, the red, white, and blue picture of a web that made the undies look so cool and big kid in the store, making me look so childish while standing in time out.
Making matters worse, only moments after my undies were put on display, I heard Midnight's soft giggle behind me.
"Aw! Aren't those precious?" They said condescendingly.
I fresh wave of embarrassment passed through me at those words. However, I closed my eyes, bit down hard on my paci, and settled in to survive the next 30 minutes as best I could. The pressure from my bladder was only getting stronger, but I was determined to keep my underwear dry. I was a big boy, after all, really, nearly an adult again.
After 15 minutes, my determination not to wet myself had waned drastically. With my nose still pressed to the trunk of the tree, I shifted my weight from leg to leg, only able to do a pathetic little potty shuffle rather than a full on potty dance with my shorts still wrapped around my ankles.
The sound of a crinkling diaper announced Sunset's approach. Unable to turn to look at them, I could only imagine the satisfied smirk that I was sure was plastered to their face.
"Oh no! Does the BIG boy need to go potty? You better show the poor, little baby how to keep your undies dry! You wouldn't wanna have an accident in front a little kid like me!" Sunset taunted as they toddled closer to me.
I groaned behind my pacifier, not willing to risk the consequences of talking during time out. However, although I desperately wanted to yell at my friend to go away, I knew I deserved every insult they flung at me.
It only took moments for my friend's face to appear in the corner of my vision.
"Oh no, can Big Bad Maddie not talk right now because he's sucking on his paci? I thought paci's were for babies, not big kids?"
I groaned again, the sound muffled by the shield of the pacifier as I shuffled from foot to foot in discomfort again. The pressure in my bladder was so bad I could barely focus on Sunset's words.
"Oh no! You aren't doing a potty dance, are you Baby Bean? I bet you wish you were wearing a diaper right now! You could just let go," Sunset said before there expression changed as an idea hit them, "I mean, I gotta go potty too, and I can just go right now! Listen!"
With that, Sunset smiled, scrunched up their face and let loose. The sound of soft hissing as their urine hit their diaper filled my ears. The sound was too much. I couldn't hold it anymore. Tears started to well in my eyes as I felt a warm wet stream of pee release into my once pristine Spider-Man undies, only to immediately become warm, disgusting rivers of urine, running down my thighs.
As I felt my pee run down my legs into my shoes, I also could feel my chances of becoming a big kid again drift away too. I began to bawl behind my pacifier, not just because I was ashamed of my accident, but also because I was upset at myself for the bratty behavior that got me here.
"Oh, Baby Bean! Did you piddle in your cute Lil' Spider-Man undies? Spider-Man looks sad! He's not Aquaman. He doesn't like getting all wet," Sunset teased. Their words stung more because I knew they were in a soggy situation of their own that was somehow more babyish, but also less embarrassing. "Daddy! Maddie's Mommy! Maddie has an accident!"
My fear overwhelmed my sorrow as I heard Mommy and Midnight walk up behind me.
"What was that sweet, little Sunsie?" Mommy asked my friend turned temporary nemesis.
"Baby Bean wet his undies! Go look!" Sunset responded with more excitement than I really thought was necessary.
A soft, familiar hand grabbed my shoulder, gently inviting me to turn around. I didn't want to. Maybe, if I just stayed here for a while, my undies would dry and no one would be the wiser. It was hot out, after all.
Mommy wasn't going to let me live out my delusion though. "Turn around sweetie, let's see the damage."
Her instruction and a more forceful pull got me to turn around. A dark stain covered the entire front of my underwear. The streams of urine running down my leg were far too obvious. And, even the shorts and socks at my ankles were stained from my shameful accident. I wanted to cry as Mommy forced me to hold me arms up, beant over, and tugged disappointedly on my soaked Spider-Man undies as she inspected them.
"Beanie Baby, you destroyed these poor undies! And your shorts, socks, and shoes? I thought you were a big boy?" My wife chastised me as she pulled and picked at my soaked clothing. "You were doing so good I didn't even bring a change!"
I looked up to see Midnight given Sunset a similar inspection, albeit with much less disappointment in their demeanor.
"Looks like Little Mads isn't the only super soaker here, Sunsie's diaper is pretty wet too," Midnight said as they completed their inspection, "Did you say you didn't bring a change? I've got plenty of extra diapers in my bag and maybe some spare tights. Why don't we change these little stinkers together?"
"Midnight, you are a lifesaver! Are you sure you can spare a diaper? I know how many Sunsie goes through!" Mommy responded, causing Sunset to blush for once.
"I sure do! Sunsie can be quite the pamper packer sometimes, but if my Little Sunset needs to sit in their mess for a bit, they'll survive," Midnight answered.
As Mommy and Midnight talked about diapering me with Sunset, my outrage started to grow. I just had one accident! And I warned Mommy that I needed to go! She was the one that made me stand with my nose to the tree! I shouldn't be put back in diapers! Maybe a pull-up or training pants, but a diaper was too far. I opened my mouth to tell Mommy as much.
"Mommy, this…" That was as far as I made it before my wife shot a hostile glare towards me.
"No! I will not hear a word out of you, Madison James. I trusted you to be big. I trusted you to be kind. I trusted you to keep your pants dry. Obviously, I cannot trust you. You will be going back to diapers. I will not tolerate any grief. Otherwise, I will throw you over my lap and show you just how little you are, understood?"
My stomach dropped to my toes. I hadn't been lectured like that for years. Not stupid enough to risk my Mommy's wraith, I nodded my head and responded, "Yeth, Mama." I kept suckling the pacifier, now happy it was in my mouth for the comfort it provided.
Mommy helped me take off my wet clothes before taking my hand at the same time that Midnight took Sunset's. We were both led back to the bench where our two caregivers had been chatting earlier. Sunset waddled in their soggy diaper as I walked normally, save for being completely naked below the waist. Once at the bench, Midnight quickly pulled out a large blanket laid it on the grass.
"Alright little ones, lie down," Mommy said, directing Sunset and I to lay down next to each other to be changed like the small children we were being treated as, something we'd done together hundreds of times before.
We both quickly complied with my wife's gentle command as Midnight dug through their diaper bag, getting out changing supplies for two infantilized adults.
"Um, Maddie's Mommy?" Sunset asked as we waited on our backs.
"Yes, sweetheart?" Mommy answered.
"Do you think I could get your phone and watch a show while I got changed? I've been good and haven't had any screen time all day!" Sunset begged.
From across the nearby bench, Midnight called out, "Don't give it to them! It's my fault, really, but we're really trying to break little Sunsie's screen addiction."
Sunset pouted as Mommy smiled down at them. It didn't take long for Midnight to join us with two diapers in hand.
"Let's get these babies back to clean and dry!" Midnight announced as they knelt down and began unsnapping the buttons of Sunset's shortalls.
With expert hands, Mommy and Midnight changed me and Sunset. Where normally, Sunset and I would joke and giggle as we got changed together, today, with my fall from grace, I couldn't bring myself to even make eye contact with my friend as my wife wiped my butt and other delicate bits.
Mommy and Midnight had us both changed and back up quickly. Once I was standing in nothing but a T-shirt and a diaper in the grass, Mommy pulled me to the side.
"Maddie, your behavior today has been unacceptable. Clearly, you are not ready for the level of responsibility that I thought you were. Thinking you were was my fault. So, now, until you prove me otherwise, I am demoting you back to diapers, but know that that is based on my mistake, not yours," Mommy began.
"That said," Mommy continued, "You messed up too. I warned you to be nice. I warned you to keep your pants dry. You didn't. Sunset is your friend, and you bullied them. That is not okay."
"I am not going to make you finish your time out. I don't think you would learn anything from it," Mommy lectured, "But I do need you to do one more thing before you can go back to playing. I need you to apologize to Midnight for bullying her precious little one, and I need you to apologize to Sunset for being a bad friend. Can you do that for me?"
Looking down past the bulging diaper around my waist to my bare feet, I let myself feel shame for my behavior yet again. "Yeth, Mommy," I answered, the pacifier still stuck between my lips.
With that, I waddled off to do as Mommy asked. The bulk of the diaper between my legs felt both foreign after the months of training pants and underwear, but, at the same time, frustratingly familiar.
I approached Midnight first, feeling my apology to them would be easier. I popped my pacifier out of my mouth so my apology would sound more sincere.
"Um, Sunset's Daddy? I, um, am sorry for bullying Sunsie," I said timidly.
Midnight looked at me with gentle, but stern eyes.
"Thank you for apologizing, buddy, but it's not me who you need to apologize to, is it?"
I shook my head up and down. "No, it's not."
"Who should you apologize to, baby?" Midnight asked.
"Sunset," I responded meekly, avoid eye contact with my friend's daddy.
"Yes, Little One," they said softly, "But who else?"
I looked up at Midnight, confused. Who else was there to apologize to?
Midnight smiled knowingly, then looked pointedly over my shoulder. I turned and saw Mommy picking up our make-shift changing station.
"Was how you acted nice to your Mommy?" Midnight asked.
I looked down at my feet in shame again. "No, it wasn't. I probably owe her an apology too, huh?" I answered.
"What a smart boy! Maybe you'll get another chance at undies again, yet? I don't know if I can say the same about my Sunsie," Midnight said, turning to look at Sunset for the first time since we began talking and catching them digging through their diaper bag. "Hey! Get out of there! Go play! I didn't pack your tabbie and Daddy's phone is in my pocket! No screen time!"
As Sunset ran off chastened, I followed, wanting to apologize to my friend both because I was ordered to and because it was the right thing to do.
"Sunsie," I said as we reached to sandbox again, "I'm sorry I was mean to you. Can we still be friends?"
Sunset turned to me with their trademark bright and friendly smile. "Thanks for saying sorry, Mads! And, of course we're still friends! Who else is going to put up with my smelly butt and listen to me complain about being put in my crib early?"
Sunset followed up their statement with a big, warm hug.
"Now, let's play!" Sunset said.
I had to disappoint Sunset one more time today, though. "Sorry, Sunsie, I'll come play in a sec. I gotta go say sorry to Mommy first."
With that I turned and toddled back to Mommy, who was now sitting on the bench with Midnight again. Midnight smiled at me reassuringly as I approached, obvious remorse in my body language.
"Mommy?" I asked tentatively.
"Yes, Beanie Baby?" She responded, a note of frustration still lingering in her tone.
"I, uh, wanted to say, well," I took a deep breath, "I'm sorry. I was naughty and embarrassed you. I shouldn't have." Tears started to flow as I remembered Mommy's angry lecture at the tree. "I'll never do it again! Please, just don't hate me!"
Mommy's body language and tone softened immediately as I broke down during my apology. She stood up from the bench and wrapped me in a comforting hug.
"Oh, Baby Bean, I could never hate you! Mommy was just frustrated. Everyone is naughty sometimes! You just got a little too big for your britches!"
I nuzzled into Mommy as she hugged and reassured me. She was right. I had gotten too big for my britches. But, a nagging feeling told me that Mommy was going to keep me nice and little from now on, so that being 'too big' would never be an issue again.
#ab/dl kink#ab/dl stories#ab/dl story time#ab/dl diaper#ab/dl couple#ab/dl mommy#ab/dl daddy#cg/l little#cg/l kink#Cg/l#AB/DL#ab/dl boy#md/lb kink#md/lb relationship#Too Big For His Britches
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No, I don't think that RGU "subverts fairy tale narratives". On the contrary. I don't know how intentional the writing was on the writer's part but RGU's themes, structure, and resolution are much closer aligned to the Grimm-fashion fairy tales than the manicured opening sequence might make the viewer believe. At some points they do conciously reference fairy tales whilst alos having a good grasp on it's story contents. In fact, the opening sequence is less accurate about fairy tales than the actual plot of RGU.
Anyhow, actually a quick rambling how many fairy tale motives are in Utena. some referenced to, some overtly named, some just by my personal associciation:
The only fairy tale where the story is actually changed is Sleeping Beauty. There the visual reference is extremely strong with the duel plattform (a tower) being hidden in a forbidden forest, surrounded by thorns and roses, a princess waiting/sleeping (in her coffin) on a bed of roses. But unlike in the tale, the princess isn't woken up by the whimse of the prince but is allowed to choose if she even wants to wake up. [By the way, here's an essay comparing the pschycological literary interpretation of (The contemporary reading of) Sleeping Beauty with RGU.]
On the theme of girl locked away in a tower: Rapunzel come to my mind. Indeed Rapunzel loves her prince but he's also her co-conspirator as well as mean to escape her captivity. Their scheming is interrupted, both get horribly injured while attempting to escape. They both wnader around for a long time until their finally find each other. Scarred, they still are deeply happy to have found each other once more.
One OST track is titled "Bluebeard's castle". So fitting to be played in Akio's tower. The titular Bluebeard appears at first charming. Yet his bride discovers his secret chamber of previously killed women, relaizing what a monster her once so enarmoured husband is. It's a fairy tale beginning with a slight snese of unease, building up dread the longer the bride resides in the castle. What a perfect association for Akio's facade and body count of abuse.
The next Bluebeard in the making, Touga explicitly compares Utena with "the golden Goose"; In which every one tries to rip out the bird's golden feathers, creating a gigantic queue of greed. Even though Touga most likely wants to compare Utena to something precious worth exploiting, his comparison misses how the goose's doing finally made a princess laugh, and none actually was able to rip out the precious gold feathers.
Speaking of animals... In an conversation during which Nanami has a hard time naming her ever growing distress towards Touga's and her relationships, one statue in the background switches in the form of the "Musicians of Bremen". Nanami carriesway more animal associations than even Anthy. In fact Nanami turning into a cow is her being treated as domestic labour animal. In "The musicians of Bremen", labour animals are to be slaughtered after they can't labour anymore. So they flee their circumstances, band together (heh), and find a new home as band of misfits. Whereas the statue is a string of visual warnings about Nanami's dangerous situation, it gives me hope, that Nanami might, like the Bremen musicians, escape to a not glamorous but future full of support and friendship.
Last association coming to my mind. This is an entire free-falls association but with so many Utena-Nanami-paralles, why not make an animal comparison, too? Utena reminds me so much of the "Puss in Boots". Not destined to be anything but a cat, anything but a girl, she puts on clothing that shoul dnot be hers. It suits her quiet well. Yet the puss does it's deeds to help out their master who gave her the boots. They trick an evil magician with nothing but cleverness and ligt up their master into fortune. Utena doesn't help out of thanksfulness yet, like the cat, she does act out of care and adoration for the rose bride, and triumphs over a sinister figure that seemed once so overly powerful. LIke the wizard turning himself into a mouse, Akio turns out to not be overly powerful but actually a scared manchild who refuses to grow up, and actually isn't the allmighty figure he paints himself to be.
[Bonus: Saionji as the frog prince. Very serious analysis. Even though the popular image is one of a princess kissing a frog, and him turning into a prince, the actual tale is... not so gentle. The frog asks the princess to take hiom with her, in return to giving her back the ball that actually belongs to her. The princess feels humiliated having to play-act a romantic dinner scene at the frog's demands to sit on her side and be fed. Her protests are overruled by her father reprimanding her to hold her promise towards the frog. (Anthy mentioning how Akio is more like her father to her.) But the princess has her fill with the impertinent frog, throws him against a wall, and there: He becomes a prince. The parallels between Saionji getting beat up like a punching bag until he finally chills (somewhat) down are almost too obvious. Also, the frog and him share the colour green.]
In general, fairy tales often feature disempowered protagonists, often young women, most of the time they aren't even royalty. The protagonists often survive the most dire consequences by cleverness, resourcefulness but also their kindness to strangers - not raw power or powerful magic. I've no idea why people claim that retellings are "dark", "misbehaving", or "adult" because not only is it inaccurate to whom fairy tales were told, but even in format of children's publications, fairy tales are incredibly dark already. Children's fears of abusive parents, being neglected, mistrateatment, poverty, the world being scary being forsaken by mistakes by those who were supposed to care for the child, domestic violence, even incestuous abuse do feature in fairy tales - however, the protagonists survive the most dire of straits. Even if hurt in the process, they surivive, and "lived happily ever aftere". It's a faint, promise that they found happiness anyway. How similar it rings with "someday we will shine". If these common elements don't ressemble Utena's journey, and the circumstances of her friends, i don't know what else would bear a stronger ressemblance.
Apart from Anthy's and Akio's vague connection to godhood, and allegory, none of the kinds is special. Utena is a classic fairy tale orphan child, no special parentage, only her role as protagonist follows her fending off the darkness around her.
#RGU meta#Revolutionary Girl Utena#one of these days I will finish my long Utena-fairy tale essay. One day...!#(not kidding I spend already hours and 25 pages on this + academic lreading on fairy tales in Japan)
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Tummy ache-141 & König
Based on a request: Listen. 141 (plus König if you want) with reader being know as someone who has the sweetest voice, friendlies tone, and is everyone's friend because of this but then when they finally hear them laugh. They let out the MOST DIABOLICAL, CRAZY, ABNORMAL, AND UNNATURAL LAUGH THEY HAVE EVER HEARD COMING FROM A HUMAN BEING!!!! (This is me, I was told I laugh like a witch, or a gremlin, or a undiagnosed mental person.) Thank you 😊 ---- GN!Reader, platonic!relationship, funny laugh, fluff?? ----
Being the smallest in the team, height-wise, the men who work with you always perceive you as something tiny and adorable. Your voice has always been so sweet and soft, so when Soap tells a joke in the late hours of the night, you laugh so hard that it genuinely scares them all.
The room is dim, your shadow cast on the wall as you rock back and forth with your "gremlin" laughter. Gaz is the first one to laugh at this, finds it quite funny how a cute little thing like you can laugh this loud and so…weird? He is going to be bringing this up in the future.
Ghost is the second one to react, he begins to say his horrible jokes. His deep laughter mixed with that stare he gave you dealt the deal that you would now be known as Grim, the soldier with the laughter and his newest goal is to make you laugh as hard and as much as possible. This is why now that Soap got that laugh out of you, Ghost keeps adding more jokes to the point you start to tear up and beg for him to stop because your tummy hurts.
Price joined afterwards, cigar held between his fingers as smoke fell from his cough of laughs. Tears get wiped the louder Ghost makes you laugh. Clouds of smoke fill the room, you enjoy this small moment since it will be the last one before going on an operation. When Price can't take the pain from laughing, he walks out of the room.
Soap and König join last and all they can do is bring a louder laughter to the room. The men only bring the volume of the room to rise, everyone inside adding more fuel to the fire and without knowing, soldiers from other sides of base begin to peek into the room, wanting more on the gun. Soap is the kind of man to push people when he laughs and naturally, the tall man König is became the target.
For nearly thirty minutes the jokes and laughs came along all until everyone lay on their beds, trying to catch their breath.
This is the rare moment soldiers like them and you get. It is beautiful, truly magical to have a sit-down, to listen, to smile and to feel that just for a moment all is fine. No blood on the dark military clothes, no worry about what is out there. A gun, bullet, a cry for a medic, all that is out of this room. Warmth, friends and a good rest, that is what stays in this room. This is a good tummy ache.
A/N: having a Writing/English class and my head is only filled with what I've done for the past week. Rhetorical this and that and now what you just read is my last piece of energy.
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Duck, duck, duck, duck, Goose! | Top Gun Fanfic 🧸
Top Gun AU✈️
——
Pairing: Nick Bradshaw x Carole Bradshaw , Pete Mitchell & Tom Kazansky
Summary: When it came to kids Carole, Iceman and Maverick only had to worry about two. Bradley and his young brother, Dane. Then came Jenny. It seemed fit, 3 for 3! But when another Mitchell kid, came along they realized they had more on their hands. 4 for 4!
Characters mentioned/include: Audrey, Buzz, Wraith, Slider, Hazel, and the rest of the 86’ class
Timeline: Post-Top Gun (1986), Pre Top Gun Maverick
Warning: Canon character death mentioned
Fic type: Fluff and humorous, with small moments of angst
Previous fic —> Click here
———
There were moments like this where if you told Maverick and the others years ago, that kids would be part of the agenda they would’ve laughed at you so hard and through you were crazy.
But then the kids started coming over the years.
It started with Goose and Carole. High school sweethearts destined to get married and have kids of their own, where everyone can only wish to have a portion of what they had.
Of course, they had little Bradley Bradshaw or baby goose as he was nicknamed.
Adorable little blonde boy with cubby cheeks and a curious little smile that meant determination. He looked just like his father in every way, Maverick would tell his nephew that years to come.
It was great being a little group of 4. Memories made and laughs saved.
But sadly, then Goose died after a training accident while Carole and Bradley were there to visit them. Maverick felt horrible, so did Iceman, Audrey and the rest of the 86’ class. Gloomy painful days were to come after that.
However there was a flip side, a little surprise to come after the clouds were blowing away.
And that little beam of sunlight became Dane Bradshaw many months later.
Carole didn’t know she was pregnant at the time until Audrey pointed out how fuzzy she felt lately and honestly they couldn’t have been happier in that moment.
Maverick lightly joked, “Wow! I guess Goose really take you to bed.”
“Oh Mav, play nice and that was a little secret.” Replied the Carole with a smile joking back.
Sunset chuckled, “And made sure to leave a bag of surprises afterwards.”
—
Goose really did leave a bag of surprise afterwards but they didn’t know that yet until years later.
Duck, duck, duck, duck, Goose!
—
Dane Bradshaw was the spitting image of his mother with such a warmth and gentle smile to him, he was nicknamed pooh bear.
Him and Bradley were only 2-3 years apart in age, but there will be moments where they acted like they shared the same brain cell. Being silly little ducklings, surprising people with their charm and sweet tactics.
There were days Carole would come home to the kids (along with Maverick) causing a mess in the house baking. Days where the boys will go playing with water guns and end up getting Audrey’s clothes wet.
Or with Iceman, where Bradley would show their uncle an idea for an airplane to build with boxes and other items in the house. Meanwhile Dane would collect all the ideas, wanting to go big or go bold enough to shine with their plane where Ice couldn’t have the heart to say no.
Other times, Dane was the sweetest thing in the whole entire world. A gushing image is a gentle breeze holding up flowers to his aunties such as Hazel and Audrey, making get well cards for his mama. Hugging his uncle Mav and teasing his uncle Ice with a little grin.
But he was also very protective, him and his brother, being a guard dog when it comes their mother. That goes for Hazel, Valkyrie, Audrey and whatever other lady in their lives.
————
Speaking on ladies, they were surprised at the time she arrived. It was an unexpected surprise indeed as for she came at an old hour of the night. No alert, no phone call or an letter from the post man.
Just an knock on the door in a carrier held the first half of The Mitchell-Bradshaw clan. Jennifer Penelope Mitchell, or as she was nickname princess.
Don’t worry she gets a handful of nicknames later on, so do all the kids!
Pete and Ice were in total shock at the bundle of joy brought to their attention but welcomed her with open arms nonetheless.
It took Maverick a long couple of hours, even days to fully get his head around the fact he had a daughter.
It wasn’t until Carole met her and saw the cheeky little smile that she said, “Yup, Pete she’s yours alright!”
“Yes she is.” Audrey added, blowing raspberries into her cheek.
The girls fell in love with Jenny overnight, engulfed by her sweetness but since she was Mav’s kid the girl hated to sleep and very silly. According Iceman she was stubborn like her father but Audrey would say she’s stubborn like him instead.
When Carole brought the boys to meet their cousin/future best friend, Bradley was taken back by Jenny and Dane was curious rather shy about the ideas.
“Mama! Does that mean I have to share a room with her too?” Bradley asked pointed to the girl.
“Wha’ she do?” Dane added, his vocabulary and grammar not very accurate yet.
It was silly, since Dane Bradshaw was close enough be to around less than 2 years older than her but he was curious about the situation, not wanting to share the spotlight with anyone. Same thing when for Bradley, even though he was the oldest.
Carole had to correct them saying, “No boys, you don’t have to share a room with her. And she is just a baby, so she doesn’t do much yet. But I think you guys are gonna like her a lot.”
And as always, Carole Bradshaw is correct!
Since Bradley quickly warmed up to Jenny wanting to show her everything and take the girl everywhere he went like the big brother he is to Dane. Especially when Jenny got older he got to joke around, watching over her and and play with her a lot more.
Bradley nicknamed her Jenny Penny.
Dane, since they were somewhat closer in age range per say, the two were pretty close. Dane being softer, very silly toward the girl and more importantly being protective, catching up on new things with things he learned at school and playing with her a lot of the time.
He nicknamed her JenJen.
Eventually the boys would give her the classic nickname and future callsign, JenPen.
But Jenny Mitchell wasn’t the one who got nicknames, because to her Bradley was Brad Brad and Dane was Danny Boy.
Even though as the years went on, her nicknames for them changed to Chicken and Engineer.
———
Soon enough Baby Goose, Pooh Bear, and Princess had a 4th to complete the group (hopefully)…
…Daffy Duck!
Other name being used for Austin Mitchell.
If one Mitchell kid wasn’t enough, look no more to a second one! That was another surprise that left Carole, Iceman, Audrey and Maverick himself flabbergasted at the news. But it’s wasn’t an total surprise since Maverick was known for being in the dating scene a long time, falling in and out of love with several women because the attraction was a strong thing.
Like a lot things, it never lasted too long ending up in heartbreak, loneliness and confusion, thinking it was a short fling.
But as we learned that every actions has an equal opposite reaction. That resulted in his son, in which he chuckled and sighed in awe of the little smile that entered his world. He fell in love with his kid the moment he met him.
Slider joked, “Alright, either Maverick needs to do something about the love making around here or Goose had an grand ol’ conversation about bringing four ducklings with the big man upstairs when he left?!”
Iceman glared at his best friend jokingly, “Very funny, buddy. There is no way Mother Goose had this all figured out and planned for this to happened. It was just fate!”
Maverick shut them both up carrying his son in his arms and said, “Oh shut it you two! Before we know it you’re popping out kids of your own.”
Carole smiled, “My husband wouldn’t do such a thing, even if he did I think theses were gifts. Look how cute they are!”
~~~~~
Two blondes and two brunettes, all wrapped into a cute little gift baskets from Mother Goose himself.
“Yeah no Slider’s right, Nicholas Bradshaw brought down four ducking after his departure!” Audrey added a few minutes later.
~~~~~
Austin Mitchell was a spitting imagine and reminder of his father, times 10! From his brownish-green eyes to his nose, even the floppy mess of chocolate brown locks. His smile was no different, giggling about his favorite things and moving around with so much energy that he could become the next marathon runner for god’s sake.
But like any kid here, especially a kid that belongs to Maverick Mitchell, Austin was a clumsy boy knocking into everything and getting himself stuck in troubling situations. It was cute but also kinda annoying.
“A little tornado warning should come with him.” Joked Wraith once he met the boy with a smile.
Nonetheless he was loved. Jenny was only two years old when she got her baby brother, wanting to parenting him and keep the little guy out of danger with a pout. But then again, she was also very clumsy and cheeky herself so they both ended up in a little sticky situation.
Seriously, both kids were found in the kitchen once eating one of their father’s favorite sweet treat, being honeybuns, while on the floor giggling.
Iceman snorted so loud seeing his niece and nephew happily eating the dessert that his only questions was, “How did you two get your hands on it in the first place?”
“Unca Iceee!” Austin only yelled with a little smile and sticky fingers.
“You wan’ some?” Added Jenny with the similar little smile.
Other times, Austin would be the only one brave enough for certain things, dragging Bradley along to meet new people such as when they met Wraith or Buzz for the first time. Austin scared poor Wraith with his chaotic tendencies meanwhile Buzz laughed his ass off.
Plenty of times, that chaotic charm the young boy naturally held would bring a smile to the faces he meets, like when he met Ark and Hazel. When Austin finished hanging out with Hazel, she wanted to keep this boy for herself.
…but there were some moments where Austin’s shining personality mixed with the wrong crowd.
Let’s just say Ice and Mav enrolled him into little league baseball practice for one week, but midway through that same week the coach had to call Audrey to take the kid back home. Because due to Austin’s style, tiny temper and competitive nature when his team wasn’t winning, he decide to use his baseball bat and hit one of the kids from the other team with it.
The kid went as far as to chase the other children around the field in revenge and when Audrey heard that, she couldn’t help but laugh out loud. She knew it was a bad thing and they probably had to enroll him into a different sport, but the image in her head of her nephew chasing the other kids around like a Looney Tune character was too funny.
“Yup, he was definitely Pete’s son.” She said with a smile, picking up her nephew to take him out for ice cream and a small lecture onto how it’s not nice to hit people.
Let’s just say Audrey wasn’t the only one laughing at the news that day about why Austin Mitchell might not return to baseball practice that week.
————
Speaking of Austin, since he was hopefully the last baby for now at least, they decided to set up a color coordinated system for the kids.
That meant if gifts were given, certain items were being delivered, and everyday things like cups, hats, sweaters, backpacks, socks and or etc. each child had their own version of one.
Hell, each kid had certain days set on the calendar, where they all had to do something the other wanted. Like park, mall, trips to the beach and or going to the movie theater.
It was Carole’s idea! So there were no fighting, especially since they were all so little at the time.
Bradley’s things always had a cherry red dot, cute little red label or red post it note on them. (Sometimes apple or red-orange color)
Dane’s things always had a sunny yellow dot, little yellow label or yellow post it note on them. (Sometimes bumblebee or yellow-green color)
Jenny’s things always had a rosy pink dot, little pink label or pink post it note on them. (Sometimes lilac or pink-red color)
Austin’s things always had a sky blue dot, little blue label or blue post it note on them. (Sometimes olive or blue-green color)
And honestly, it was pretty helpful at the time when they were just little kids. Since they knew once they got older, all four of them would pick certain colors to wear, act differently for types of situations and understand the concept of what is not their stuff, don’t take.
But of course like any set of children, no matter what you did or how many times you had to lecture them about a topic, they will always fight about something. Like toys, bedding, backpacks, clothes, food and things to do together.
Like when Bradley and Dane were fighting over a certain Star Wars backpack they saw at Walmart to take for back to school time.
Or when Austin and Jenny were arguing about a DC LEGO sets they both wanted to buy, Batman or Superman sets.
They were kids! You can’t prepare for everything, so the parents always stepped in making the decision for them or had to settle on a small compromise on what’s the verdict. 
——
Nonetheless, they were good kids that’s what matters.
Yes, they were all different ages with vastly different views on things and personalities but that’s what makes them unique.
They care about their children way too much and thanked Goose for sending such a wonderful set of surprises and memories to come.
But the question that the adults tend to have on their minds was, how would the world handle their set of ducklings as they grow up?
What kind of experiences they will have?
Who will fall in love and who will get their heart broken?
Will there be friends or foes that come they’re way?
So many questions but only time will tell…
———
Thank you so much for reading this! 🎬 I know, it’s not exactly formatted like my other stories per say but it was an interesting way to introduce theses kids.
What was your favorite part? 💕
Please like, share and comment for more stuff like this! ✈️
Tags: @gcthvile @msrochelleromanofffelton @gaminggirlsstuff @topgun-imagines @starkleila @whitewiccan @comfortzonequeen @sherloquestea @theloveoftoms @mandylove1000 @mallowbee4 @rooster-84 @djs8891 @novavida and etc
#top gun maverick au#top gun oc#top gun 1986#top gun fanfiction#goose bradshaw#carole bradshaw#bradley rooster bradshaw#baby goose#pete maverick mitchell#tom iceman kazansky#maverick x daughter!reader#mavdad#icepop#top gun headcanons#iceman x oc#iceman lives#top gun x oc#tom kazansky x oc#pete mitchell x oc#maverick fluff#top gun au#pete mitchell fanfiction#icemav#tgm fic#tgm oc#rooster fanfic#rooster top gun#rooster x oc#bradley bradshaw fanfiction
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You asked me this, so it seems fair to ask back:
Top 5 in9 episode endings? ^_^
Apologies it took me so long to answer this!! I had to think quite a bit about it.
5. Boo to a Goose
This was the first in9 that I got to watch the night it aired and the ending caught me completely off guard - I was not expecting a dystopian at all! It got me really excited to rewatch it the next day, and when I did it was so satisfying to notice all the little details foreshadowing the reveal. Those seeds were planted so thorough that retrospectively I can’t believe I didn’t pick up on any of it the first time! I’m a big fan of dystopian fiction; the way the ending opens up so many questions about the world these characters are living in just really fascinates me.
4. The Stakeout
Similar thoughts to Boo to a Goose. I think the way the vampiric elements are hidden in plain sight of a police procedural is such a simple yet ingenious take on both genres. Unlike Boo to a Goose, I went into The Stakeout knowing exactly what the twist would be, but it was just as enjoyable to be able to spot in real time where all the seeds were being planted.
3. How do you plead?
Steve and Reece’s ability to foreshadow is just astounding to me at times. Urban’s confession is, I think, one of my favourite twists in all of in9. What the ending reveals about Urban’s character and his relationship with Webster just adds so much dimension to characters I was already invested in. The gradual dimming of the lights throughout the episode until we’re standing in the dark watching Webster falling down into hell screaming and pleading is so so good. The build up of tension in less than 30 minutes really got me on edge - I spent the whole episode just knowing something horrible was afoot, and they did not disappoint. Not to forget Steve’s character being revealed as the Devil!!
2. Bernie Clifton’s Dressing Room
I talk about how different Wise Owl’s ending feels to me compared to the rest of the show; the ending to BCDR is the only episode that comes close to replicating how Wise Owl’s ending makes me feel. It’s not as hopeful as Wise Owl, but there is just something so beautiful about that bit of closure Tommy gets to have. Where Wise Owl’s ending opens a door for Ronnie that his father has kept locked, BCDR’s allows Tommy to close a door he’s had left open. Not too sure if that really makes any sense. The song + dance routine I just adore for many many reasons, and when the music fades into the organ coming from the next room and Tommy leaves to go to it…what a tear-jerker.
1. Wise Owl
I feel the same way as you wrote in your response to when I asked you this question, so I won’t say much. This ending just feels like something else, and I adore it so much. Compared to the endings of similar episodes, it feels a bit like a miracle that Ronnie gets to have such a hopeful ending. The visual of him growing up whilst his father flaps about pathetically behind him, and the beautiful score swelling - so impactful.
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The Great Faerun Baking Show (part two)
I've decided I'm going to run with this anyway. It is a beautiful day in Faerun and I am a horrible goose fanfiction writer. There are several things I need to get done today, so obviously I'm going to not do them and write this instead.
For those of you who are just stopping by, I had a horrible idea a while ago and this is the result. I have no idea what's going to happen or who's going to win. I’m just going to roll a D20 ‘bake check’ for everyone and write out the results, including what everyone rolled so y’all know I’m not cheating just so my druid boyfriend can win. The person with the lowest total score (out of a possible score of 60) goes home.
We've got the main 6 companions, Jaheira, Halsin, Minsc (and Boo), Minthara, Dammon, and my tav Medora (who y'all can just pretend is Alfira if you don't want someone else's tav in the story, since they're both female bards)
Week One, Cake Week: Star baker was Karlach, Minthara went home
Week Two: Biscuit Week, or "Viconia's Walking Florentine"
Signature Challenge: Sandwich Biscuits
Astarion: Bourbon biscuits. He and Shadowheart took a shot right when the bake started. He took a few more shots after that just because he could, and ended up making a bunch of vampire jokes with Noel Fielding. Despite the alcohol handicap, his biscuits turned out quite nice.
Dammon: Dulce de leche and banana biscuits. The dulce de leche overpowered the banana a bit, but the texture of the biscuits themselves were great.
Gale: Tara's coffee biscuits. He really wanted to bring back the memories of caffeine-fueled all-nighters at Blackstaff Academy. He also used a cat-shaped cookie cutter. The biscuits weren't exactly identical, and the coffee cream was a bit too runny.
Halsin: Lavender and vanilla biscuits. He used a duck-shaped cookie cutter because he likes ducks. They were all perfectly identical and the flavors were incredible. He got a Hollywood Handshake for them.
Jaheira: Malted milk biscuits. She wasn't able to get them as identical as she would have liked, and some of the biscuits were a bit underdone.
Karlach: Peanut butter and jelly sandwich biscuits. She was determined to have Paul like something with peanut butter in it. Unfortunately he still doesn't. They were also a bit messy. They were adorable in their messiness though.
Lae'zel: Pistachio custard creams. They were messy, and the dragon cookie cutter she used was a bit too delicate, resulting in some dragons missing their tails.
Medora: Raspberry and almond linzer biscuits. They had a lovely classic flavor profile, and were nearly identical.
Minsc: Coconut biscuits. He tried to use chocolate designs to make them look like tiny coconuts, but it wasn't completely successful. The flavor, however, was nice.
Shadowheart: Blackberry and earl grey biscuits. She tried to shape them like night orchids, colored with activated charcoal. However, the color made it hard to judge whether or not the biscuits were overcooked, and several of them were burned. The earl grey was so faint it was overpowered by the blackberry and the, well, burn.
Wyll: Empire biscuits. He grew up sneaking them from the kitchen as a boy, and wanted to stick to his 'classics done right' style. Unfortunately the biscuits weren't as crisp as Paul and Prue would have liked. Noel still stuck one in his pocket for later though.
Technical Challenge: Coconut Macaroons
(I think I'm going to list them from worst to best from now on)
11. Dammon
10. Shadowheart
9. Medora
8. Karlach
7. Lae'zel or Wyll (they both rolled a 9)
6. Wyll or Lae'zel
5. Halsin
4. Astarion
3. Jaheira
2. Gale
Minsc (honestly how does he keep doing so well idk man)
Showstopper: Gingerbread Showpiece
Astarion: To keep with his Brand, he decided to make a graveyard with several little gingerbread mausoleums and monuments. His, of course, was the biggest and fanciest one, with the door open and a little paper cut-out of himself coming out. Very tongue-in-cheek. Some of the monuments were sloppy, because he had so many he didn't have time to make them all super polished.
Dammon: He did his best to make an anvil, a hammer and a little piece of pulled sugar as the metal to be forged. He then discovered that despite working with molten metal on a regular basis, molten sugar still burns just as much when hitting the skin, and dropped it. He spent so much time on a backup sugar piece that the presentation on his anvil and hammer suffered a tiny bit.
Gale: His scene was an open book with a little wizard casting Fireball standing on the pages. There were huge cracks in the gingerbread book, but the wizard and his fireball were nicely detailed. He wasted a lot of time because he needed the spell piped on to the gingerbread to be ACCURATE DAMMIT.
Halsin: He created a peaceful woodland scene with trees, a family of bears, and some mushrooms. The largest bear broke, but he was able to fix it somewhat and prop it up against a tree. Bears lean against trees all the time. He hoped the judges might think it was purposeful. They saw right through him, however.
Jaheira: Years of helping her children with various projects has paid off. She somehow in the time limit created Wyrm's Crossing and just for show a poured-sugar River Chionthar. That earned her a Hollywood Handshake.
Karlach: She made an impressive replica of her tent, complete with a small army of teddy bear cookies. She even took the time to make little bears shaped like her friends and the judges. When asked if she hadn't wanted to make something more badass, she shrugged and said she could like cracking skulls and teddy bears at the same time.
Lae'zel: Her red dragon looked more like a guinea pig, unfortunately, so she changed her answer last-minute and said it was a giant space hamster. Due to its red color, though, the judges saw right through her story.
Medora: She attempted to create a lute, a mandolin and a drum. The neck of the lute broke and the piping on the drum was far from precise, but it wasn't a complete disaster.
Minsc: He made a treasure chest mimic. Originally he'd wanted the lid to open, but the hinge broke. It was still beautiful regardless, and quite big. It nearly took up the entire counter.
Shadowheart: Her little gingerbread cottage was already precariously lopsided, and when she turned to grab another piping bag it fell completely off the bench and onto the floor.
Wyll: He replicated his favorite park in Baldur's Gate out of gingerbread, even sculpting a statue with modeling chocolate. It was very impressive.
The Results
Our star baker this week with a total of 45/60 is Halsin!
And unfortunately, with a score of 9/60, Shadowheart has to leave the tent.
Feel free to play along, roll bake checks, and comment with what your Tav would make! Yeah I can't be stopped we're on to bread week next.
#I know she's everyone's favorite I'm sorry#I swear I'm not cheating with my rolls#baldur's gate 3#bg3 fanfiction#bg3 shitpost#astarion#bg3 astarion#astarion ancunin#shadowheart#bg3 shadowheart#karlach cliffgate#bg3 karlach#karlach#halsin#bg3 halsin#halsin silverbough#wyll ravenguard#bg3 wyll#lae'zel#bg3 lae'zel#bg3 gale#gale dekarios#bg3 jaheira#minsc and boo#medora#my writing#bg3 dammon
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well that happened, tadc reaction
stuffs under cut
yipee ads :D sick beats yoo new intro yipee silly pommi silly symbols is it just me or did things get… golder nauseating i think this is a dream, soo sobble oh my god this hurts to watch i don't like thit "i don't wanna play with you anymore" toy story vibes oof collission errors at their finest best girl raggy is it just me or did she get deeper?? man it's so much better watching yt on a laptop then phone "judging by what he's been teasing" FOURTH WALL BREAK canadaland BUBBLE!! local intorvert what's with the block? LARPing :,D he's so me frfr of he's smoking GUNNY ELEPPHANT MY FAVORITE THIIIING shiny manrqquiens kinda nice ngl awww kinger :D it's giving mario movie tbh "GOD" I'M CRYING AHAHAHAHHA ooooh amazing digital yuri she just like me frfr loloo kinda sweet i looove jax ha :D pomni is me jax is so slayful wacky sound effects i'ts only been thrity seconds but i love her already this si adorable WAIT SAD BACKSTORY GUMMIGOO jax has those n genes jesus christ bunny boy i swear i've seen that joke before babootka little arms georg gummigoo is precious jax is actually horrible kuh-nife jax is a masochist lesbian gangle real OH GOD NO RAGGY girly got inverted hot chokky, or diarreah i love colission errors NOO GUMMY COME BACK POOR GUMMY SAAAAVVVEEE HIIIIIIM that's not terrifying at all it's giving n learning he's a clone vibes exstestential horror yippee :D POMMY SAVE THE DINESAW you're in out of bounds dumass POOOR GUUUY NOOOO NAW WAAAAAAA D: data in a computer WAIT THEY CAN GET AWAY WITH THAT REFERENCE wow i hate this, i haaaaaate this jesus fuck my man she wouldn't last a day on copper 9 the keys come back i legit throught that was a nuke oreo wheels he's busy being emo i love his voice NO GUMMIGOO YOU'LL LIVE ON ON TURMBLR oh shit pomni therapy it's giving cabin fever oh i'm sad now YEES POMNI LET HIM COME WITH YOU CAINE WON'T MIND HAHAHAHAHAHHAAH (hyperfixating) his legs are so frucking weird bruh like yourself you worked at C&A i love him yipeeeeee colission glitches are best glitches fudge is nauseating nd i hate him md fans before a new ep: kinger why is your head in a bucket RAGATHA NO IT'S FINE SHE'S JUST IN THE ETHER kinger admin headcanon HE JUST DIED THEY MURDERED A GUY is there like a one vomit per episode requirement or sumting AWWW HE'S BEEEEST YEESSSSS GUMMIGOO GO SAVE YOUR MOMMA are they dancing? are those cahsews on the front? EVERYONE IS DEAD oh… my… god CAINE I HATE YOU CAINE CAINE CAINE I HATE YOU were her teeth clipping? ptsd flashbacks lol RAGATHA FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING GOOD PLEASE BE RIGHT oddly wholesome awww don't make me sad NO DIALOGUE? GOOSE YOU COWARD! awwwww wait noooooo this iiiissss sweeeeet I WANNA GUMMIGOOOO PLUSHIE jax looking pretty neat ngl
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who is your favorite bob's burgers character? what's your favorite aspect about them?? what's your LEAST FAVORITE??
Thank you so much @br1ghtestlight for giving me this ask!! 😭❣️ Just for the future, though, if anyone wants to give me an ask, it’ll have to be through this account, because any ask given through my main account disappears because I’m still Shadowbanned and Tumblr is mean 😒
But onto the actual question!! Well, Light, you already know my absolute favorite is 1,000% our precious baby boy, Gene. I think my favorite aspect about him is that he has some of the best lines in the show humor-wise, but he has a great deal of depth hidden underneath the surface. He’s genuinely an incredibly talented musician (even though he and show claims he only knows a few chords, come on, he’s actually super talented) and he’s such a sweet person. He doesn’t enjoy pranking people simply because it makes them confused and uncomfortable. He just wants people to be happy!! 🥺
He also has a bigger body type which is rarely commented on and he has a love of food which is super relatable to me (I just love food, pffffft). And the headcanons of him being Genderfluid gives me an insane amount of Serotonin. It just makes me insanely happy. As a Genderfluid person, it makes me feel seen and represented, even though he’s not canonically Genderfluid. Just seeing him be unapologetically himself is incredibly lovely.
Now, because there are just so many characters I love, I must list a second favorite. And that would be Bob!! Previously, I’ve said Linda, and don’t get me wrong, I still love her. She’s hilarious and amazing and truly the best wife (🎶 Best of Wives and Best of Women 🎶) but there’s just something about Bob that’s so relatable to me. He’s always tired but always tries his best. Not to mention that his passion for cooking and feeding people is just so sweet 🥹 He loves making food for people and having food bring people together!! It’s so lovely.
Bob is also super Introverted which I relate to very hard. He has a hard time making connections with other people, and has a tight-knit circle (AKA his family) that he prefers spending his time with. And he sometimes has difficulty talking to people without coming across as weird, which I also relate to. Plus, his little quirks are so endearing, like talking to inanimate objects and pretending they’re alive. And getting so hilariously excited about Thanksgiving 🤣
And Bob and Gene together brings one of the most underrated and sweetest relationships in the Belcher family. Their Father/Son relationship is always so adorable to see. The Laser-Inth will forever be my favorite Bob and Gene episode, and probably solidified these two as my favorites.
As for my least favorite, at first I was going to say that’s difficult, because I love almost every character in the show for one reason or another. But then I realized what the obvious choices are: Gloria and Al. They are the absolute worst. Linda deserves good, doting parents, and these two are the complete opposite of that in every way. Sure, maybe they were slightly better when Linda and Gayle were younger, but definitely not now. The Terminilator II: Terminals of Endearment really solidified just how awful they truly are.
Linda dropped everything to help them at the airport, even forcing Bob to close the restaurant for the rest of the day. Then the entire family went on a wild goose chase trying to track down both Gloria and Al, who somehow kept escaping from their line of sight. Only to find out that these two could’ve bought Al’s cream at the airport themselves the whole time. Not to mention the fact that they found out that Gloria just stole Bob’s charger and refuses to admit it. They keep making excuses for their horrible parenting and Linda just has to deal with it, which is wildly unfair.
Plus, Gloria once told Linda that they aren’t the type of people who build things?? Who says that to their daughter?? These two frustrate me to no end. Definitely the worst characters in the show, no contest.
Tina gets an honorable mention simply because of how relatable she is and how sweet she is. She just has such a kind heart like Gene (except when it comes to Tammy ☠️). But that’s okay, because Jimmy Jr. loves it when she’s mean 😌
As a treat for asking me this, here’s an image I found of the Burger Babies in Disney dresses!! Credit goes to whoever on Pinterest made this lovely image:
Also, because I need to be a gremlin every time I mention Gene, I’m going to promote Geneuary again, which begins on January 8!! Hype hype hype hype hype—
#asks#doodler’s daydreams#this was SUCH a fun question thank you!!#i saw a comment once saying that bob is the most dad ever and gene is the most son ever#if that doesn’t sum them up i don’t know what does 🤣#their relationship is lovely and i could spend all day talking about it and just them as characters individually#and i could also spend all day talking about how much i hate gloria and al because they’re the worst#linda (and even gayle) deserve so much better tbh#bobs burgers#geneuary2024
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2023 CHARACTER WRAP
share your top nine characters of this year
tagged by @matbaynton - sorry bestie didn't realise you'd tagged me until i was insulted i wasn't tagged when i saw emma do it. then checked my notifs and saw i was after all 😌
most will be mats. there are some non mats though!
1. chris pitt-goddard
he is just soooooo perfect. my beloved<3
2. joe starling
BEST BOY!!!!! BABY BABY BABY BABY BABY i love him sosososo much he's such a cringefail loser flop man and he's sooo beautiful and i love him dearly
3. ariel conroy + jamie winton
ariel is soooo insane and i love him!!! he's awful and terrible and perfect all at once. ough baby
and ariel's lovely lovely twin!!! like emma said u can't have one twin without the other, they're a duo. a package deal. they're also fucking 😌 real dirty 😌
4. sam pinkett
i need to knock him up. next
5. thomas thorne
the mat thru which i was introduced to mat (although i watched horrible histories when it first aired, so... reintroduced?) anyway he's perfect and i love him
6. william agar
precious little baby. adorable. perfect. not given enough love. sweet little thing. im kissing him always. also his arse 💯💯💯💯💯
7. ollie plimsolls
there is one person to blame for this. because of you, i think about him very often. and dream up scenarios involving him. and watch his scenes a lot. thanks heather xoxoxoxo
8. zagreus hadesgame
played a lot of hades again this year. his snark and his genuine loveliness make me soooo
9. edelgard von hresvelg
i looooooove her oh my goooooooood babygiiiiirl i loooooove youuuu. best part of playing black eagles is when rhea is like "kill her!!1!!" and byleth is like "no 💖"
tagging: @the-20th-century-girl @kore538 @sonnet-of-anarchy @captains-clever-goose @caps-clever-girl and idk anyone else who wants to do it x
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I promise this is the last I speak of geese, but consider: Tigerstar v Goose. The only creature he is truly scared of
Also, perhaps the Clanmew for geese could be similar to how the internet has kind of nicknamed them "cobra chickens"? Of course I'm sure there'd be an actual name for "goose" in Clanmew, but maybe popping a word for snake (or just a derogatory curse) in front of said word.
(Side note, Spicekit is actually quite an adorable name)
It's a wonderful in the four Clans, and you are a horrible Fireheart.
They probably don't liken them to snakes, simply because the one dangerous snake the Clan cats actually encounter is adders. If they have any animal similie for geese, it's "Heron Duck"
But that doesn't seem harsh enough, Bastard Goose should be really biting...
Will keep thinking about it
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The Birthday - 4
PREVIOUS CHAPTER
All I could bring myself to do was stare at the slowly cooling puddle of urine I was sitting in as a triumphant grin spread across Melody's face. I didn't want to make eye contact with the woman who had so thoroughly humiliated me. Also, as much as I hated to admit it, I was afraid that if I looked up I would accidentally catch a glance at the toilet sitting just feet in front of me. The thought of even looking at the horrific thing sent a shiver of terror down my spine. Fuck Melody's horrible, but effective, hypnotic triggers.
"My, my, you certainly did a number on that little diapy of yours, didn't you baby?" Melody asked rhetorically. "Luckily, I was prepared to really pamper you for your birthday," my wife chuckled, emphasizing her horrible pun as she began to walk out of the bathroom and back into our master bedroom.
Despite the deep shame I felt sitting mere inches from my toilet in an overflowing diaper, I couldn't help but roll my eyes at Melody's use of the Pampers®/pamper wordplay.
"Really? You've clearly read enough of my work to know how overdone that pun is?" I said as Melody left the room. "Given all of your prep work and," I stopped mid-sentence to allow myself an involuntary shudder to work it's way down my body, "inventiveness for my torture so far, I really expected more."
Melody laughed in response to my critique of her uninspired wordplay. "That's big talk coming from a little man that is SO afraid of the potty he would rather piss his pants than use the toilet like an adult."
I felt my full body flush with embarrassment. Looking down at the puddle I was sitting in again, then back up at the potty monster looming in front of me, I decided that it was time to find a more dignified (and less scary) place to banter with Melody from. My wife must have agreed, because as I began to push myself into a standing position, her voice rang out with a sing-song tone.
"Baby, it's time to stop playing in the bathroom. You don't have a good reason to be in there anyway. Come to Mommy," she ordered.
Since it was my plan to get out of our bathroom anyway, I complied. As I stood up, I scrunched my face up in disgust as I felt the weight of the wet diaper settle between my legs. The padding that I didn't even notice when I woke up, now felt like a was carrying a bag full of lukewarm, wet oatmeal between my thighs. I spread my legs out as much as possible to minimize the feeling of the wet undergarment rubbing against my skin, which, forced me into, what I knew, was a tell-tale toddler waddle as I stepped back into my bedroom.
As I walked through the door, I was greeted with Melody, kneeling on the floor, using her hand to cover a giggle as she looked up at me. I glared back at her.
"Love, you look SO adorable. Just like a pouty little toddler! I should be taking pictures of this!" She said between laughs.
It took a surprising amount of self-control for me not to stomp my foot or stick my tongue out at her. I held it together. I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of making me act more childish than she already had.
"Oh, don't be such a grumpy goose! Mommy knows how to help you. Come lay down and we'll get you in a dry bottom!" Melody said, patting a plastic, baby blue changing mat, clearly sized up to fit an adult.
More than anything else, I wanted to get out of the wet diaper taped to me. It was humiliating and disgusting. So, in the interest of getting what I wanted and avoiding additional punishments from 'Mommy,' I waddled over and laid on the changing mat like an obedient toddler.
"You know, changing my pissy diapers has to be disgusting for you. I know how much you hated changing the boys' diapers when they were younger, and, you've made it abundantly clear that you're not really into ABDL. I could just take care of this myself. It wouldn't even lessen my embarrassment. It'd be, like, extra punishment, having to clean up my own messes," I tried to negotiate.
As I stated past my naked chest and stomach, as well as my bulging, padded crotch, I watched another predatory grin grow on my wife's face.
"Now where would be the fun in that baby? Do you know any other toddlers who are trustworthy enough to change their own wet bottoms?" She asked rhetorically. "No, you don't," she answered her own question, "and, you're little tantrum about using the potty just confirmed that you are nothing more than a pathetic… little… baby." Melody lightly slapped my wet diaper after each of the last three words for emphasis.
"Plus," Melody continued as she bent over me and started to undo the tapes, "who said I didn't like this? I don't like the idea of your infantilizing and demeaning powerful women, but, seeing you reduced to my plaything is starting to turn me on."
To illustrate her point, Melody folded down my diaper, exposing my urine soaked crotch, grabbed a wet wipe, and, instead of moving to wipe me, wrapped my penis in the wet wipe and started stroking it up and down my exposed shaft. Despite my hatred of the situation, my body betrayed me again, immediately getting hard.
"Baby likes this too, doesn't he?" Melody asked, continuing to stoke me, while leaning farther over me, showing off her ample cleavage.
"Uhhh… Ahhh.. guhhh… Stop…" I whined in pleasure. Each stroke of my wife's hand causing me to thrust my hips off of the wet diaper under my ass and towards her fist.
"Too bad Mommy says that you can't get hard anymore unless your little man is snuggly wrapped in diapy," Melody said.
At the use of the hypnotic trigger, my body immediately reacted. My once long, hard cock, immediately shrunk and became flaccid in my wife's hand. The overwhelming, brain melting pleasure I was just experiencing immediately dissipated. Desperate to regain the sensation, I aggressively thrusted my now soft penis uselessly into Melody's firm grip. Nothing happened.
"Oh no! What's wrong? I thought you liked it when Mommy touched you like that?" Melody said mockingly.
"Mommy, please, don't do this!" I begged, momentarily forgetting what happened when I tried to use my wife's name.
"Oh no? Are you too little to play big boy games with Mommy now? Let's check." Melody's sing-song, condescending tone, now had a distinctive, sharp edge to it.
As I looked down at my shrinking penis, Melody began to clean me up. Grabbing a new baby wipe, she expertly wiped my groin clean. Then, with an authoritarian slap to the side of my right asscheek, "Up," she ordered. I complied, lifting my ass off the well-used diaper. Melody quickly pulled the soaked undergarment out from under me, wiped my now more easily accessible butt clean, and slide another giant diaper underneath me.
"Down," Melody said. Once again, I did as I was told, placing my butt cheeks down on the much more comfortable dry padding of the new diaper.
"Now that Mommy has you all clean, let's see if you can at least pretend to be a big boy for me," Melody said playfully.
I watched, concerned, as she leaned over me exposed groin again. However, this time, she didn't stop wear she could just easily grab my penis. Instead, she opened her mouth, and, while making seductive eye contact with me, placed my whole, soft, flaccid penis, between her lips.
I bit my lip in anticipation of what was to come. I reveled in the feeling of my wife's tongue and lips working their way up and down me as they had many times before. It felt good. But, something was wrong. Like when she was using her hand to stroke me earlier, despite everything feeling normal and wonderful, my dick wouldn't respond. It wouldn't get hard. It wouldn't get bigger. All I could do was watch as my limp penis flipped around uselessly as Melody played with it in her mouth.
"Gahhh…. What is wrong!" I screamed out in frustration.
Melody took that as her cue to stop and sit up. She grinned.
"Oh no, it looks like you are too much of a baby to play big boy games with Mommy anymore! I guess I am just going to have to wrap your little friend here back up where he belongs," she said, playfully flicking my penis.
For the second time that day, tears started to form in my eyes.
"Why did you do this to me?" I asked desperately.
"Sshh, baby, it'll be okay. Just because you can't play big boy games with Mommy outside your diapy, doesn't mean you can't have any fun at all," she responded as she folded the fresh diaper over my crotch, taped it snuggly into place, and then rubbed my penis through the front of the padded prison she had taped me in.
As soon as she put pressure on me, my cock sprung back to life with a vengeance. I almost immediately became rock hard, as if all of the pent up arousal from the ineffective hand and blow jobs earlier were released at once. Subconsciously, I thrusted my padded crotch into Melody's open palm, trying to increase the pressure on my throbbing member.
"Oh my! Someone likes his baby pants, doesn't he?" Melody teased as I humped her hand. "It must be even more than you like your wife's mouth?"
At those words, I forced myself to stop pressing my cock into the fresh diaper, and turned a deep shade of red.
"No… that's not true. I hate this. You did this to me. Fuck you!" I spat out.
Melody was undeterred by my outburst. She pressed the open palm of her hand hard into the front of my diaper, allowing her to feel the full girth of my erect penis and effectively pinning me to the floor.
"Your little man here tells a different story," Melody said with a mischievous wink. "But, if you really don't want to play in your diaper, I won't make you."
Melody lifted her hand from my diapered crotch, freeing me from her clutches. I whined a bit in disappointment when the pressure was lifted. As much as I would never admit it to my wife, her strokes did feel good. However, I was determined not to be reduced to an baby-man who would willingly cum in his diapers.
Melody stood up and started walking out of the room.
"Come on baby, if you don't want to play in here right now, we might as well go to the living room and find something else to do," she said as she started to leave.
I moved to stand up and follow, only for Melody to turn around and glare at me.
"You aren't standing up, are you? Don't you think a little boy who is terrified of the potty and can't get hard except for in his Pampers is too little to walk?" Melody asked.
I knew the question was rhetorical, but answered anyway, "No, I am plenty big enough to walk on my own, Mommy. Even toddlers who refuse to potty train can walk."
"We'll just have to see about that. Mommy says…" my wife began.
Before she could finish her sentence though, I dropped to all fours, and yelled out to cut her off. As much as I wanted to maintain what independence and control I had, I wouldn't let my stubbornness force a new, embarrassing hypnotic trigger to be planted in my brain.
"No, you're right Mommy, I can't walk. I'll just crawl."
Melody's grin stretched from ear to ear. "Good baby! You're learning! Now, come along."
I crawled behind Melody as she left the room and headed down the hall towards our living room. Being forced to follow her on the floor like a dog was humiliating, but, I quickly found it had it's advantages. Despite my anger with the way Melody had been treating me, I still found her jaw-droppingly attractive. From my vantage point on all fours, I got an excellent view of her incredible ass swinging back and forth in front of me. As I enjoyed the unexpectedly wonderful view I had, I felt my already erect penis grow harder as it gently rubbed against the padding between my legs. The view and the feeling we're so good, in fact, that I had to work to not give into the feelings of pleasure under the diaper and keep moving.
Luckily, or unluckily, depending on your point of view, for me, I didn't have to fight my urges long. It only took moments for us to reach the nearby living room. The sight that greeted me there was surprising, but not unexpected. Melody had clearly come very prepared for this weekend of torture.
For the most part, our living room was unchanged. Our potted plants still decorated the room. The room itself was dominated by the presence of a large, comfy couch and recliner. A large, 70' television hung from the wall.
Small, but notable changes had been made to the room though. In one corner of the room, in front of the couch, a slightly larger than normal pack-n-play was set up. It was sized for toddlers still, but large enough that I could guess, just by looking at it, I could lay down fully on the bottom of it, curled up.
Next to the mesh-sided contraption, between the couch and the television laid an extra large, pastel blue, fleece baby blanket. Small baby toys, like rattles, soft blocks, and teethers were scattered on top of it.
On the opposite side of the baby blanket from the pack-n-play, a baby 'activity center' was erected. Two arches, connected at their peaks, rose up from the ground. Soft baby toys and flexible mirrors dangled from the arches, set there to occupy an entertain an immobile infant, left lying under the contraption.
One last thing caught my eye from my vantage point on all fours as I crawled into the room. Propped against the wall was a giant teddy bear, the type you only see on sale at Costco or other big box stores. However, rather than being a plain tan bear, the one had been dressed up. The best wore a small pink tutu around it's waist and attached to its head was a cheap plastic tiara enlaid with fake plastic gems.
Examining the room, I had no idea what Melody's next game was, but I knew I wasn't going to like it.
"Oh look, baby, Princess Bear looks so excited to see you! She's been waiting to meet you all day!" Melody said as she watched my gaze fall on the giant stuffed bear. "Why don't you crawl in over and give her a hug?"
The suggestion that I knew was truly a command seemed harmless enough, given the rest of my humiliations that day, so I complied. I crawled over to the giant bear, wrapped my arms around it and gave it a small hug.
Melody followed me and leaned over, whispering in my ear conspiratorially as I squeezed the neck of the stuffie.
"I know a secret! Princess Bear has the biggest crush on you. She was really hoping you could have some pretend 'big kid' play time this afternoon," my wife informed me.
I released 'Princess Bear' immediately, turned, and stared at my wife in bewilderment. Did she just suggest she wanted me to hump this giant stuffed animal like one of the diaper wearing sluts in my story that would do anything to get off? I knew I was better than that. My ability to ignore my painfully erect cock, locked away in my padded prison told me that.
I couldn't help but tell Melody what I was thinking in so few words.
"Mommy, no. I am not some pathetic little diaper slut that will hump anything to get off. I can't control myself," I spat out.
"Are you sure, because your little man seems to say different," Melody said, bending down further and rubbing her hand over my diaper covered dick. I had to bite my lip to suppress the rush of pleasure.
"Yes," I moaned out in opposition.
Melody ran her hand seductively up the front of the diaper I was wearing again.
"Are you sure? Because, since we clearly can't play 'big kid' games together anymore, I thought it would be fun if I watched you play with Princess Bear while you watched me play with myself. Mommy's have needs too, you know?" Melody reasoned with me.
"No," I spat out again,"I won't be your pathetic little diaper slut."
Melody stood back up.
"We'll just have to see about that," she said, he tone shifting from seductive to menacing.
A shudder passed through me as I realized that I may have fucked up again because of my pride.
NEXT CHAPTER
#Ab/dl#ab/dl caption#ab/dl mommy#ab/dl story time#ab/dl couple#ab/dl kink#ab/dl community#ab/dl stories#humiliation kink#ab/dl diaper#diaper stories#diaper regression#The Birthday
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I made a post about the fact that I was reading acotar a couple months ago, so this is an
UPDATE (IM NOT GONNA CALL TAMLIN BY HIS NAME SO, 🤭)
I finished it and acomaf, and im halfway through acowar
I’m proud of myself for hating Tonka Truck from day one, like how can one man be such a dick wad? Like yeah, he’s traumatized, and his shift in personality was caused by his childhood and being raised as a high lords son and not learning to talk about his feelings. But trauma doesn’t justify emotional and (nearly) physical abuse👍
Feyre finally grew a brain cell (she got it from the other high lords, she got one, from all of them. Just kidding, it was only Rhysand.) and she also had a
Bad Bitchification
So she’s not just a sad sad little girl who needs a man. Love that she and Tampon broke up after under the mountain, like it’s so silly goose of her.
Fuck Ianthe, fuck her right into that rock she smashed her hand with
Rhys is such a fucking simp, it’s adorable he’s actually so fucking romantic, especially Feyre since for her the bar is underground
Mor, Cassian, Amren, and Azriel are just so chill, “oh? You want to bring this random girl who saved us into our group? Ok chill, have her bring wine” I love them so much istg
I cant tell if Lucien got a character arc or not, because he went from listening to Tortellini, to risking his life for Feyre and the Night court. But he still kinda acts the same. He changed his ways not because he really wanted to, but because he wanted to see his mate again. For all I know, right now he could one be doing these things to get closer to Elain.
Elain’s situation is horrible, especially since she had no clue what was happening and they were only able to figure out what the sitch was when Feyre and Nesta were nearly kidnapped and killed. It also makes me more intrigued for the sixth book, I wanna see if she still has her own thoughts, or if the majority of her brain has been taken over by the seer powers the cauldron gave her.
Nesta also had a
Bad Bitchification
During the span between the cauldron and the meeting with the high lords (the part that I’m currently at since I’m a slooooooow reader since I have little motivation to read at the end of the day) I also love the idea that her little “you cant tell me what to do” is fucking people over CONSTANTLY. Like five minutes pass and she’s like “I’m not coming to your weird fuck high lord meeting” then she goes to read a book. Which is so real btw.
any other interesting characters…
VIVIANE!
I LOVE HER SO MUCH!
She’s such a vibe, like get yourself a lover who would fight for you and your home and then turn out to be your fated mate so you get married, which is totally not highly situational at ALL.
#acotar#acomaf#acowar#books and reading#book review#book tok#maasverse#sarah j maas#rant post#i wanna go home#i wanna see my cat#her name is milkshake and I love her
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Get to know me 💙🧡 thanks for the tag @sunshine-gumdrop @gooses-chaos-demon and @saintofanything
Do you make your bed? No, not usually, only if I know someone is gonna see it
What's your job? I’m a student right now, so no job :(
If you could go back to school, would you? Already there buddy
Can you parallel park? I’m a passenger princess (I’m a danger to myself and others on the road)
Do you think aliens are real? Definitely
Can you drive a manual car? I can’t drive any car 🤷♀️
Guilty pleasure? gossip blogs 🤫 (i feel horrible after reading them but i'm a nosy bitch so it happens)
Tattoos? None right now, but planning on getting some this year
Favourite colour? Pink! I had a phase growing up where I hated the colour but it’s back to being my favourite
Favourite type of music? Not really sure how to describe it. I listen to a lot of Taylor Swift and Sabrina Carpenter so very teenage girlie music but also a lot of hyperpop
Do you like puzzles? Love them! My mom and I used to get a thousand piece one every christmas and solve it together
Any phobias? Actually everything in theory, my anxiety goes crazy
Favourite childhood sport? Football (Soccer)
Do you talk to yourself? Relentlessly
Tea or coffee? Coffee but I prefer something sweet
First thing you wanted to be when growing up? Ballerina
What movies do you adore? 10 things I hate about you, jennifers body, almost every norwegian movie from my childhood
Tagging @xxbuildyourowndisasterxx @sunkissedbedard @longliveyamo @stuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu @goalplz @crow-the-unknown and anyone else who wants to participate!
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